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All That There Is(n't) To Know About Frogs
Critics have called this book “utterly useless” and “infuriatingly inaccurate.” Within its pages, multi-award-losing scientist Amelia E. Clawford presents a guide to all the facts she made up instead of actually doing research on the topic. Blatantly false, laughably contradictory, and entirely void of anything close to actual insight, All That There Is(n’t) To Know About Frogs will equip you with nothing you have ever needed to know about frogs.
- GenresNonfiction
48 pages, Kindle Edition
Published February 29, 2024
3 people are currently reading
89 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews
December 21, 2023
I did not enjoy this book. (That’s for you, Edward Dedward Wilbur. I, too, don’t want Amelia’s ego any bigger)
Not that I think this book is an ego grower. I had a lot of fun and I’m definitely considering the possibilities of using this book for funny Christmas presents in the future. Amelia has a funny sense of humour. I think this book fills a niche that had to be filled (but only by this one book. We don’t need others). In the history of the universe, a book like this was bound to be written.
Amelia just did it first AND did it best.
This is like if Emily Wilde’s Encyclopedia of Faeries was dropped on its head as an infant. And left on the ground.
Very excited about all these new non-facts I now know.
Not that I think this book is an ego grower. I had a lot of fun and I’m definitely considering the possibilities of using this book for funny Christmas presents in the future. Amelia has a funny sense of humour. I think this book fills a niche that had to be filled (but only by this one book. We don’t need others). In the history of the universe, a book like this was bound to be written.
Amelia just did it first AND did it best.
This is like if Emily Wilde’s Encyclopedia of Faeries was dropped on its head as an infant. And left on the ground.
Very excited about all these new non-facts I now know.
January 5, 2025
Re-read (out loud this time)!
Absolutely enjoyable little read. I'm so happy. :) I love frogs and the style is exceptionally funny.
I love how there was a little storyline woven throughout the "non-research."
The politics section is still my favorite. Haha.
Absolutely enjoyable little read. I'm so happy. :) I love frogs and the style is exceptionally funny.
I love how there was a little storyline woven throughout the "non-research."
The politics section is still my favorite. Haha.
February 23, 2024
5/5 Stars - So funny that I tripped while standing on an unmoving treadmill.
Well, well, well. Where to begin with this one... All That There Is(n't) To Know About Frogs is the least factual book you will ever read. That being said, it did teach me more than my college biology course (probably because I paid zero attention in that course. But hey, I still walked away with an 'A').
The Frog Book (because I don't have time to type the full title again) is chaotic satire centered around frogs, cheese, and prison. If that does not sound good to you, then you probably should not read it. However, if it does sound good to you, then you should read it. You'll learn nothing, but it might cause you to have an extensional crisis where you contemplate what "truth" even is. Maybe you'll realize that it is the frogs who hold the secrets of the universe and that within their ponds, and that they are waiting and watching... waiting and watching until the time to act arrives. Maybe you'll realize that you should be afraid of them. Maybe it's too late...
Anyway! Read the Frog Book!
This review was not endorsed by frogs in any way, shape (excluding trapezoids), or form, and the opinions expressed about the motives of frogs are as non-factual as the book that is being reviewed.
Well, well, well. Where to begin with this one... All That There Is(n't) To Know About Frogs is the least factual book you will ever read. That being said, it did teach me more than my college biology course (probably because I paid zero attention in that course. But hey, I still walked away with an 'A').
The Frog Book (because I don't have time to type the full title again) is chaotic satire centered around frogs, cheese, and prison. If that does not sound good to you, then you probably should not read it. However, if it does sound good to you, then you should read it. You'll learn nothing, but it might cause you to have an extensional crisis where you contemplate what "truth" even is. Maybe you'll realize that it is the frogs who hold the secrets of the universe and that within their ponds, and that they are waiting and watching... waiting and watching until the time to act arrives. Maybe you'll realize that you should be afraid of them. Maybe it's too late...
Anyway! Read the Frog Book!
This review was not endorsed by frogs in any way, shape (excluding trapezoids), or form, and the opinions expressed about the motives of frogs are as non-factual as the book that is being reviewed.
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August 5, 2024***CONTENT GUIDE***
Recommended Age Rating: Most likely to be enjoyed by readers aged 12-21, but I would consider it appropriate for all ages. However, it is up to the reader (and for younger readers—the reader’s parent/guardian) what they consider appropriate to read.
Language: N/A (strongest word used is dang)
Violence: a very mild amount of offscreen violence (mild spoiler: a bird is eaten by a frog). Weapons are mentioned in passing.
Romance/s3xual content: N/A
Substance Abuse: uhhh…a character consumes excessive amounts of coffee. Idk if that counts.
Chaos Meter: 187,387,009
Disclaimer: This is mostly based on my memory, and while I’m fairly certain this is all correct, I may be slightly off. While I think this book is completely clean for all ages, that is just my opinion. Please do your own digging rather than relying solely on my opinion. Feel free to email me at amelia.procrastiwrites@gmail.com if you have questions about content in All That There Is(n’t) To Know About Frogs.
I had way too much fun writing this book, and I hope y’all have way too much fun reading it :)
Recommended Age Rating: Most likely to be enjoyed by readers aged 12-21, but I would consider it appropriate for all ages. However, it is up to the reader (and for younger readers—the reader’s parent/guardian) what they consider appropriate to read.
Language: N/A (strongest word used is dang)
Violence: a very mild amount of offscreen violence (mild spoiler: a bird is eaten by a frog). Weapons are mentioned in passing.
Romance/s3xual content: N/A
Substance Abuse: uhhh…a character consumes excessive amounts of coffee. Idk if that counts.
Chaos Meter: 187,387,009
Disclaimer: This is mostly based on my memory, and while I’m fairly certain this is all correct, I may be slightly off. While I think this book is completely clean for all ages, that is just my opinion. Please do your own digging rather than relying solely on my opinion. Feel free to email me at amelia.procrastiwrites@gmail.com if you have questions about content in All That There Is(n’t) To Know About Frogs.
I had way too much fun writing this book, and I hope y’all have way too much fun reading it :)
May 7, 2024
Pure, delightful, Lemony Snicket-esque chaos that balances on the knife's edge of brilliantly clever and absolute ridiculousness.
March 18, 2024
Delightfully useless! I had the absolute pleasure of editing this book and must I say it was beautiful. Kinda sad my editor's notes got cut but we win some we lose some. You should get this book, you'll learn so many things that aren't true.
February 29, 2024
If you're looking for a one-sitting read about frogs (or what not to know about them) and a perfect way to celebrate LEAP DAY, this is the book for you!
"Now, frog that jumped out of the book when I finished it, can you please put the knife down, I gave this book a good review."
"Now, frog that jumped out of the book when I finished it, can you please put the knife down, I gave this book a good review."
March 23, 2025
Positively horrendous book. ;) Utter nonsense. Complete gibberish.
I definitely won't be taking an island vacation in the near future, nor will I be looking for any strange trees in the middle of the ocean. :D
I definitely won't be taking an island vacation in the near future, nor will I be looking for any strange trees in the middle of the ocean. :D
February 29, 2024
5/5 ⭐
This book is utterly chaotic and absolutely hilarious. I laughed so many times when I was reading it out loud with my mother. And I learned absolutely nothing 🐸
I wholeheartedly recommend it if you want a short comedy about frogs and nonfrogs (and so many in between).
This book is utterly chaotic and absolutely hilarious. I laughed so many times when I was reading it out loud with my mother. And I learned absolutely nothing 🐸
I wholeheartedly recommend it if you want a short comedy about frogs and nonfrogs (and so many in between).
October 18, 2024
absolutely hated this book, what an useless thing to know about frogs who in fact do not exist
March 15, 2025
Delightful!
I'm not exactly sure what I just read, but I absolutely loved it! It was so much fun! This is the perfect read if you need a smile!! :)
I'm not exactly sure what I just read, but I absolutely loved it! It was so much fun! This is the perfect read if you need a smile!! :)
March 7, 2024
This book is amazing and hilarious. I laughed so much and am now educated in non-frog facts. I thoroughly enjoyed it and want to start a petition to have it read in the “BBC Narrator” voice. 10/10 recommend.
February 21, 2024
I just want to say, this book was incredibly inspiring, but also disappointingly inaccurate (*sighs*). I'd like to think that the forgies would enjoy vending machines, unless I'm wrong. Also, no way they have the finesse of a peanut butter sandwhich. That's too kind. I'd say they have the stutter of a cream cheese bagel, from my personal experience.
February 7, 2025
I don't know how this got in my kindle but I decided I should finally read it. It's not really my sense of humor I think
July 5, 2024
a review by a very human not-frog. (Ribbit)
I was told I needed to write a bad review even if I enjoyed this book. So here goes.
The book “All there Is(n’t) to Know About Frogs” is absolutely NOT a brilliant masterpiece of frog non-knowledge. It certainly WON’T make you laugh out loud while your family is trying to have a serious conversation, causing all eyes to turn to you (not that that’s ever happened to me before), and it definitely has NO responsibility for my newly developed fear of vending machines.
If you’re looking for a charming little book that’s sure to make anyone smile, DON’T pick up this one.
Thank you 🐸🪷
(Ribbit)
I was told I needed to write a bad review even if I enjoyed this book. So here goes.
The book “All there Is(n’t) to Know About Frogs” is absolutely NOT a brilliant masterpiece of frog non-knowledge. It certainly WON’T make you laugh out loud while your family is trying to have a serious conversation, causing all eyes to turn to you (not that that’s ever happened to me before), and it definitely has NO responsibility for my newly developed fear of vending machines.
If you’re looking for a charming little book that’s sure to make anyone smile, DON’T pick up this one.
Thank you 🐸🪷
(Ribbit)
March 21, 2024
I have come to the realization that if I had as many Eureka moments as Amelia allegedly has, all plot points that I struggle with in my own projects would be fixed. XD
The evident love of cheese throughout this wonderful book definitely has my support.
My favorite piece of advice NOT from frogs is "If you can't sleep, try this new invention called Staying Awake All Night! It's like getting a good night's sleep, but much, much worse."
It was so fun reading this as a published work after having beta read! I'm so proud of you, Amelia, for braving the scary world of publishing for the first time.
The evident love of cheese throughout this wonderful book definitely has my support.
My favorite piece of advice NOT from frogs is "If you can't sleep, try this new invention called Staying Awake All Night! It's like getting a good night's sleep, but much, much worse."
It was so fun reading this as a published work after having beta read! I'm so proud of you, Amelia, for braving the scary world of publishing for the first time.
July 5, 2025
Utter chaos with a hint of stork. Laughed more than I thought I could.
May 2, 2024
This book saved my life. At the lowest point in my life, I was battling a hippopotamus armed with naught but an extremely large butterfly net. My hope was gone and I was losing greatly. But just when my butterfly net was broken, I remembered that in my back pocket rested a copy of Amelia E. Clawford’s All That There Is(‘nt) To Know About Frogs! I pulled out the book, swiftly using it to defend against what would have been my opponent’s fatal blow. This book held such awesome power that the hippopotamus assassin was driven back by it, and decided to leave me to live my life in peace. So all you who have angered the Organization Of Hippo Assassins (OOHA), this book may very well be your best friend.
September 1, 2024
Blatantly false with no useful information whatsoever.
All That There Is(n't) To Know About Frogs contains absolutely no information of value, nor does it pretend to. You can read this book and come away with no more knowledge than you had before.
You do, however, come away with more appreciation for the Alfonso's Triple Frog, the Gorf froG, the Stork, and the Xk,ymjchxetsyrhft Frog. These are all completely fake types of frogs, which I'm appreciative of because I did not want to have to fill my house with vintage vending machines to avoid them.
Props to the frog guard, the real (but of course not real at all) MVP.
#FreeAmelia
All That There Is(n't) To Know About Frogs contains absolutely no information of value, nor does it pretend to. You can read this book and come away with no more knowledge than you had before.
You do, however, come away with more appreciation for the Alfonso's Triple Frog, the Gorf froG, the Stork, and the Xk,ymjchxetsyrhft Frog. These are all completely fake types of frogs, which I'm appreciative of because I did not want to have to fill my house with vintage vending machines to avoid them.
Props to the frog guard, the real (but of course not real at all) MVP.
#FreeAmelia
March 1, 2024
An absolute riot of a book. If the forgs mentioned did exist, they would stage a revolution and ban this book. I enjoyed every false moment of this book of inaccurate facts about nonexistent frogs.
The firgfirgfirgfirgfirg living in the basement of my top deck wishes to acknowledge one slight discrepancy in this book. Frogs of all nature typically become very wrathful when stepped on, which this book claimed was false. Beware. Do not step on frogs, nonexistent or otherwise.
The firgfirgfirgfirgfirg living in the basement of my top deck wishes to acknowledge one slight discrepancy in this book. Frogs of all nature typically become very wrathful when stepped on, which this book claimed was false. Beware. Do not step on frogs, nonexistent or otherwise.
March 25, 2024
Quite a (non)horrible book, didn't teach me anything about frogs.
April 7, 2024
All That There Is(n’t) To Know About Frogs is the most nonsensical fun I have ever read. It made absolutely no sense but at the same time it also weirdly did. It was nonscientific in the most scientific way possible.
Imagine Winnie the Pooh wrote a book about frogs but it’s all made up. That’s what it feels like to me.
Next to Percy Jackson, there’s no other book that made me laugh this much.
Also the underlying story? I need a sequel.
10/10 recommend it if you want a good laugh and something to instantly raise your mood.
I don’t think many people could pull off writing a book like this and Amelia Clawford did it brilliantly!
Imagine Winnie the Pooh wrote a book about frogs but it’s all made up. That’s what it feels like to me.
Next to Percy Jackson, there’s no other book that made me laugh this much.
Also the underlying story? I need a sequel.
10/10 recommend it if you want a good laugh and something to instantly raise your mood.
I don’t think many people could pull off writing a book like this and Amelia Clawford did it brilliantly!
November 3, 2024
Let me tell you what you absolutely need to know: the writing and humor of this book is so engaging that I read the ending publisher's note, about the author, AND all of the acknowledgements. And when a book's dedication makes you laugh, you know you're in for a treat.
ATTITKAF is exactly that: a treat, especially if your schedule is slammed 25/8 like mine is or you're in a reading slump. Or both (like I was). This book takes EXTREMELY little commitment and yet immensely rewards you for the little you give it. It was the first book I've ever annotated because I wanted to remember everything that made me smile and everything that made me actually laugh at loud. The book has quite a bit of pink markings now.
Inexpensive, short, and hilarious—the absolute PERFECT gag gift for friends and family for Christmas, birthdays, Valentine's Day, and St. Patrick's Day (they can wear this as a green hat), and a perfect reward for those moments of alone time. Get this book, because no part of you will regret it, and that's a rare find.
ATTITKAF is exactly that: a treat, especially if your schedule is slammed 25/8 like mine is or you're in a reading slump. Or both (like I was). This book takes EXTREMELY little commitment and yet immensely rewards you for the little you give it. It was the first book I've ever annotated because I wanted to remember everything that made me smile and everything that made me actually laugh at loud. The book has quite a bit of pink markings now.
Inexpensive, short, and hilarious—the absolute PERFECT gag gift for friends and family for Christmas, birthdays, Valentine's Day, and St. Patrick's Day (they can wear this as a green hat), and a perfect reward for those moments of alone time. Get this book, because no part of you will regret it, and that's a rare find.
Displaying 1 - 23 of 23 reviews