What do you think?
Rate this book
Parenting Your Child with ADHD: A No-Nonsense Guide for Nurturing Self-Reliance and Cooperation
It is now possible for concerned parents to treat their child’s attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) without medication. This book shows them how. Written by a supervising psychologist who specializes in child behavioral issues, Parenting Your Child with ADHD presents a groundbreaking program for parents seeking to reduce their child’s inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity and strengthen his or her capacity for self-reliance and cooperation. This unique program promotes positive ways of interrelating and shows parents the five main ways they may have unwittingly reinforced ADHD symptoms in the past. Far from encouraging parents to strictly manage ADHD children, this approach promotes independence in kids so that less discipline and surveillance is necessary.
Specifically, this book helps parents promote cooperation by phrasing their requests in specific ways, reduce pressure on their child, and acknowledge the child’s preference as a way to make cooperation a more attractive choice to him or her. Parents learn to resolve problems related to messiness, inappropriate silliness and intrusiveness, chores and helping family members, coordinating schedules, sneaking and stealing, noise and yelling, and overreacting. The second part of the book moves on to issues that take place outside the home, such as shopping excursions, family outings, and travel. Finally, parents learn ways to increase their child’s independence and cooperation with schoolwork and compliance in the classroom environment. The child learns the value of being knowledgeable without the motivation of punishment or gift rewards.
Specifically, this book helps parents promote cooperation by phrasing their requests in specific ways, reduce pressure on their child, and acknowledge the child’s preference as a way to make cooperation a more attractive choice to him or her. Parents learn to resolve problems related to messiness, inappropriate silliness and intrusiveness, chores and helping family members, coordinating schedules, sneaking and stealing, noise and yelling, and overreacting. The second part of the book moves on to issues that take place outside the home, such as shopping excursions, family outings, and travel. Finally, parents learn ways to increase their child’s independence and cooperation with schoolwork and compliance in the classroom environment. The child learns the value of being knowledgeable without the motivation of punishment or gift rewards.
- GenresParenting
201 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2012
52 people are currently reading
42 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
June 7, 2013
this book is full of blame toward parents. some of the material is helpful, but the overall tone is hostile.
January 15, 2014
DONT BOTHER WITH THIS BOOK. I tried to read this all the way through, but by chapter three I had been told so many times that my daughters ADHD was my fault, that I allowed her to develop the problems, and that I was irresponsible for medicating her, that I was honestly sick to my stomach. The author is so educated that they are ignorant. Spend some time with a parent and their ADHD child ether than making your lofty proclamations from your childless position.
May 11, 2021
The rating is about 2.5--this had some good advice, though I don't think my child actually has ADHD so some things that I think would likely really bother someone who actually deals with ADHD didn't bother me personally as much. He starts off by saying that some people use Ritalin and it can work, but he's going to outline some alternatives, but then throughout the book it's obvious that he doesn't agree with using it and anyone who does is just sidestepping whatever the real issue is. So that's a bit extreme.
I read this because I recognized a couple behaviors that seemed to match ADHD and while I don't think my child technically qualifies for ADHD, I was interested to see if some coping strategies would be affective for him. We all want our children to be self-reliant and cooperative, right?
Generally I felt like the book was too vague on basically everything. He gave a couple of example stories, but they didn't feel like references to real people rather just examples he came up with to prove his point which isn't really that helpful. Some of the example dialogue was helpful, but others were just unrealistic and frankly I don't think would be helpful in the moment. Some of his "tips" were laughable, like when he mentioned that many kids with ADHD often have another learning disability such as dyslexia, and his tips for helping them with reading, writing and math were, "Read aloud so it sounds just like talking, draw his letters and numbers exactly as shown, and memorize math facts (e.g. single-digit addition, subtraction, or multiplication)" I really don't see how any of that is helpful unless you were doing nothing to help them with school at all to begin with.
I think he's trying to use some concepts from "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk" but did a horrible job trying to convey it. The most useful things I got from the book were when he labeled ADHD behavior so I feel more equipped to identify it when it's happening and what to do to try to prevent it.
I probably wouldn't have bothered to finish it, but it's such a short book I felt like I should just finish it so I could really give it a chance, but I felt like it just got worse as it went on.
I read this because I recognized a couple behaviors that seemed to match ADHD and while I don't think my child technically qualifies for ADHD, I was interested to see if some coping strategies would be affective for him. We all want our children to be self-reliant and cooperative, right?
Generally I felt like the book was too vague on basically everything. He gave a couple of example stories, but they didn't feel like references to real people rather just examples he came up with to prove his point which isn't really that helpful. Some of the example dialogue was helpful, but others were just unrealistic and frankly I don't think would be helpful in the moment. Some of his "tips" were laughable, like when he mentioned that many kids with ADHD often have another learning disability such as dyslexia, and his tips for helping them with reading, writing and math were, "Read aloud so it sounds just like talking, draw his letters and numbers exactly as shown, and memorize math facts (e.g. single-digit addition, subtraction, or multiplication)" I really don't see how any of that is helpful unless you were doing nothing to help them with school at all to begin with.
I think he's trying to use some concepts from "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk" but did a horrible job trying to convey it. The most useful things I got from the book were when he labeled ADHD behavior so I feel more equipped to identify it when it's happening and what to do to try to prevent it.
I probably wouldn't have bothered to finish it, but it's such a short book I felt like I should just finish it so I could really give it a chance, but I felt like it just got worse as it went on.
July 29, 2020
TL:DR
Full 5 stars from me for:
- Concise writing, short book
- Lists of verbal responses from parent to child
- Clear and encouraging
- Practical advice for very specific situations
- Relevant enough that it's still helpful for my pre-k child though it's for ages 5+
I understand the negative reviews, kind of, but every few pages of this book I found myself closing the book, putting my hands over my face, and thinking "oh my gosh, I do this, this ismy son, I parent this way, this is so us."
So my son is 3.5. I've noticed he's got quirks since before his first birthday. It has taken me this long to consider he may have something like ADHD, and while he's really too young for any formal diagnosis, he ticks off every box for ADHD behaviours--beyond typical toddler behaviour, that is. As I read this book, it was like finally, FINALLY, someone understood how my son is different and exhausting me. I try so hard to do the right things for him, I've read all the "difficult child" and "angry mom" books and blogs, and in this book I finally got some real direction on how to parent him how he *needs*, not just what "works" for other kids/my other son. I hope that makes sense.
This book is geared for ages 5 and up. Most of the discipline and routine suggestions aren't age appropriate for a toddler/pre-k or aren't applicable anyway, but enough of it will fit right in. I found the parental direction clear, practical, well organized, and encouraging.
This book is no longer or wordy than it needs to be! Seriously, so many parenting books are unnecessarily long. The chapters are well organized. There are sooo many helpful tips and tricks! Similar to the wonderful book, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk, this author lists helpful phrases and responses.
Full 5 stars from me for:
- Concise writing, short book
- Lists of verbal responses from parent to child
- Clear and encouraging
- Practical advice for very specific situations
- Relevant enough that it's still helpful for my pre-k child though it's for ages 5+
I understand the negative reviews, kind of, but every few pages of this book I found myself closing the book, putting my hands over my face, and thinking "oh my gosh, I do this, this ismy son, I parent this way, this is so us."
So my son is 3.5. I've noticed he's got quirks since before his first birthday. It has taken me this long to consider he may have something like ADHD, and while he's really too young for any formal diagnosis, he ticks off every box for ADHD behaviours--beyond typical toddler behaviour, that is. As I read this book, it was like finally, FINALLY, someone understood how my son is different and exhausting me. I try so hard to do the right things for him, I've read all the "difficult child" and "angry mom" books and blogs, and in this book I finally got some real direction on how to parent him how he *needs*, not just what "works" for other kids/my other son. I hope that makes sense.
This book is geared for ages 5 and up. Most of the discipline and routine suggestions aren't age appropriate for a toddler/pre-k or aren't applicable anyway, but enough of it will fit right in. I found the parental direction clear, practical, well organized, and encouraging.
This book is no longer or wordy than it needs to be! Seriously, so many parenting books are unnecessarily long. The chapters are well organized. There are sooo many helpful tips and tricks! Similar to the wonderful book, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk, this author lists helpful phrases and responses.
January 14, 2019
I felt so attacked even in the first chapter that I chose not to finish. I’ve read better books that I didn’t feel attacked and that have seem to help us better than this one!
April 10, 2024
DNF, but it read more like a “parenting with love and logic” book. The advice is solid, but I just didn’t feel like I was getting anything entirely new or helpful.
March 16, 2017
I didn't read much of this book. It talks about ADHD like it isn't real saying kids don't have A.D.D. they do it, etc. I wish people who don't believe in ADHD wouldn't write books about it.
January 28, 2014
This book was a breath of fresh air. Having been told my overactive child needed medication by the school psychologist and family doctor I was tempted but as a responsible parent something told me to look further. The simple question I kept asking was, If you place your child on medication--when will it stop? Simple answer is NEVER. This book shows an engaged, responsible parent how to avoid the medication trap. EVERY parent should read it with an OPEN mind. The results are truly amazing. THANK YOU Dr. Wiener!
April 16, 2013
This was a fantastic book that not only helps with building self-reliance and cooperation with children, it works for adults too! I find myself phrasing things differently when I speak to anyone that I have a relationship with. For parents, it offers ideas/examples to help you and your child communicate in a way that will make the child a productive and competent member of society. It is a must read for not only parents struggling with their child's behavior but all parents!
August 6, 2018
I think this book is helpful for those who want to move beyond thinking about ADHD as only a disease and offer parenting interventions to help their child in addition to treating the body mind/emotions through medical treatment and therapy
July 2, 2022
If you’re a parent looking for books to help your child with ADHD, skip this one.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews