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Doctor Who Target Books (Numerical Order) #120
Doctor Who: The Romans
The TARDIS crew members have taken a break from their adventures and are enjoying a well-deserved rest in a luxury villa on the outskirts of Imperial Rome.
But in the gory grandeur that is Rome, things don’t stay quiet for long. If the time-travellers can save themselves from being sold as slaves, assassinated by classical hit-men, poisoned by the evil Locusta, thrown to the lions, maimed in the arena and drowned in a shipwreck, they still have to face the diabolical might of the mad Emperor Nero.
As if that isn’t enough, they also discover that, although Rome wasn’t built in a day, it was burnt down in considerably less time...
But in the gory grandeur that is Rome, things don’t stay quiet for long. If the time-travellers can save themselves from being sold as slaves, assassinated by classical hit-men, poisoned by the evil Locusta, thrown to the lions, maimed in the arena and drowned in a shipwreck, they still have to face the diabolical might of the mad Emperor Nero.
As if that isn’t enough, they also discover that, although Rome wasn’t built in a day, it was burnt down in considerably less time...
128 pages, Mass Market Paperback
First published October 28, 1987
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221 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 46 reviews
August 16, 2018
‘The Romans’ is one of my favourite First Doctor stories, so it’s no great surprise that I loved the novelisation too!
I’ve always enjoyed the fun playfulness of this serial, the fact that Donald Cotton has taken the story and written it in such a unique and interesting way makes it one of the best Target novels in the range.
Told through a series of diary entries, notes and letters from all the main characters POV it really gives the story an authentic feel.
There’s no other Doctor Who novel quite like this one, the style might not be to everyone’s taste but it’s probably the only story that they could do this with.
I’ve always enjoyed the fun playfulness of this serial, the fact that Donald Cotton has taken the story and written it in such a unique and interesting way makes it one of the best Target novels in the range.
Told through a series of diary entries, notes and letters from all the main characters POV it really gives the story an authentic feel.
There’s no other Doctor Who novel quite like this one, the style might not be to everyone’s taste but it’s probably the only story that they could do this with.
December 31, 2020
Other opinions are available, but to my mind ‘The Romans’ is the first time we see Doctor Who get just a tiny bit complacent (it wouldn’t be the last); coasting on public goodwill and the charm and chemistry of its regular cast, the series’ first attempt at a comedy historical, which could have been a bold subversion of the genre, falls flat largely because it just isn’t all that funny. Dennis Spooner has a rather broad brushstrokes approach to comedy at the best of times, and in this story he squandered a funny concept with lazy dialogue, obvious slapstick and a whole episode of sub-Carry On innuendo. I’m not saying there aren’t good moments in there, but it’s all pretty laboured, and rather destroys any sense of tension at the same time. Doctor Who wouldn’t get the pseudo-historical right until its next season, when two sublime scripts by Don Cotton would successfully combine precision comedy with genuine tension and even tragedy. So it is perhaps fitting that, having novelised his own television stories, Cotton also got to show us what ‘The Romans’ might have been.
His novelisations of ‘The Myth Makers’ and ‘The Gunfighters’ already demonstrate his love of language and gift for voice, being written as a Homeric eye witness account and a parody of American Western fiction respectively. With ‘The Romans’ he goes full David Mitchell and tells the story through a series of different eye witness accounts, finding every bit of comic potential in journal entries and letters by a colourful array of characters, and transforming Spooner’s rather heavy-handed farce into genuine wit. The Doctor himself is represented by a journal that perfectly captures (and only ever-so-slightly heightens) the blinkered self-assurance of Hartnell’s incarnation - in fact there’s something very pure and back-to-basics in portraying the Doctor not as a hero but as a guileless explorer, innocently blundering his way from one near-death incident to another. The amoral enthusiasm at experiencing all aspects of history, however unpleasant, is perfectly in keeping with the character we first encountered, and his innocent surprise at the attempts at his life combined and mild irritation at every interruption provide the book with some genuinely laugh-out-loud moments.
Ditto the letters that Ian Chesterton writes to the headmaster of Coal Hill school as a continuing attempt to explain his absence; or the ‘jottings from Nero’s scrapbook’; or the extracts from Nero’s wife’s Commonplace Book (‘even to bring this little note-book up to date requires more time than I can really spare from keeping my wits about me, and ensuring that I am not imposed upon or murdered in some way’) – each chapter snapping instantly into a recognisable ‘voice’ that gains comic momentum with every return (the sadistic centurion who writes to his mother about his adventures has a perfectly formed journey of his own). And the absurdity of each of these characters even finding the time to write down what is happening to them becomes a very funny motif in its own right, as the unlikely coincidences of the main characters almost crossing paths and just missing each other stack up. The ideas here (and the story’s conflaglatory climax) are Spooner’s, but it takes Cotton’s brilliance to realise them properly, with a linguistic verve that I honestly think bears comparison with Kingsley Amis or Michael Frayn.
Does this unapologetically humorous approach lose some of the story’s dramatic tension? Perhaps. Though as I suggested before, there wasn’t a huge amount of that to start with. The jeopardy of Ian’s situation in particular is exchanged for the amusingly matter-of-fact way that he takes it in his stride, and we are denied the small moment of pathos when Tavius is revealed to be a Christian with progressive views towards slavery (though again Cotton doesn’t miss the opportunity for a joke acknowledging this). Perhaps Cotton’s novelisations of his own scripts remain more successfully rounded for this reason, though as an exercise in delivering Doctor Who as out and out comedy this is his tour-de-force. It certainly blows out of the water the many attempts to turn Douglas Adams’ style into Doctor Who prose, and some thirty-something years after its publication possibly remains the funniest, and most stylishly written, that Doctor Who has ever been in any format.
Unique and about as good as Doctor Who in prose has ever got.
His novelisations of ‘The Myth Makers’ and ‘The Gunfighters’ already demonstrate his love of language and gift for voice, being written as a Homeric eye witness account and a parody of American Western fiction respectively. With ‘The Romans’ he goes full David Mitchell and tells the story through a series of different eye witness accounts, finding every bit of comic potential in journal entries and letters by a colourful array of characters, and transforming Spooner’s rather heavy-handed farce into genuine wit. The Doctor himself is represented by a journal that perfectly captures (and only ever-so-slightly heightens) the blinkered self-assurance of Hartnell’s incarnation - in fact there’s something very pure and back-to-basics in portraying the Doctor not as a hero but as a guileless explorer, innocently blundering his way from one near-death incident to another. The amoral enthusiasm at experiencing all aspects of history, however unpleasant, is perfectly in keeping with the character we first encountered, and his innocent surprise at the attempts at his life combined and mild irritation at every interruption provide the book with some genuinely laugh-out-loud moments.
Ditto the letters that Ian Chesterton writes to the headmaster of Coal Hill school as a continuing attempt to explain his absence; or the ‘jottings from Nero’s scrapbook’; or the extracts from Nero’s wife’s Commonplace Book (‘even to bring this little note-book up to date requires more time than I can really spare from keeping my wits about me, and ensuring that I am not imposed upon or murdered in some way’) – each chapter snapping instantly into a recognisable ‘voice’ that gains comic momentum with every return (the sadistic centurion who writes to his mother about his adventures has a perfectly formed journey of his own). And the absurdity of each of these characters even finding the time to write down what is happening to them becomes a very funny motif in its own right, as the unlikely coincidences of the main characters almost crossing paths and just missing each other stack up. The ideas here (and the story’s conflaglatory climax) are Spooner’s, but it takes Cotton’s brilliance to realise them properly, with a linguistic verve that I honestly think bears comparison with Kingsley Amis or Michael Frayn.
Does this unapologetically humorous approach lose some of the story’s dramatic tension? Perhaps. Though as I suggested before, there wasn’t a huge amount of that to start with. The jeopardy of Ian’s situation in particular is exchanged for the amusingly matter-of-fact way that he takes it in his stride, and we are denied the small moment of pathos when Tavius is revealed to be a Christian with progressive views towards slavery (though again Cotton doesn’t miss the opportunity for a joke acknowledging this). Perhaps Cotton’s novelisations of his own scripts remain more successfully rounded for this reason, though as an exercise in delivering Doctor Who as out and out comedy this is his tour-de-force. It certainly blows out of the water the many attempts to turn Douglas Adams’ style into Doctor Who prose, and some thirty-something years after its publication possibly remains the funniest, and most stylishly written, that Doctor Who has ever been in any format.
Unique and about as good as Doctor Who in prose has ever got.
January 3, 2025
Donald Cotton was chosen to novelise this story on the basis of the original author being dead, and his novelisations of his own comically inclined Hartnell stories. Cotton chooses to tell the story in an epistolary format, including delightfully ridiculous conceits such as Ian writing letters home. He plays up the absurd at every opportunity, from the Doctor’s delusions of his musical prowess to the farcical moments where characters just miss each other. Like the best comedies it has the benefit of brevity, giving us a short but sweet routine before getting off the stage.
December 31, 2022
Doctor Who novelisations tend to be quite faithful affairs, novelising (it must be said) a lot of stories that perhaps weren’t crying out to come alive in prose. Some of them expand interestingly on what we got on screen, perhaps building up a minor monster into something really scary or taking an unpopular side character and making it clear the programme makers felt the same way as the audience. But in general, you know what you’re getting.
In comes Donald Cotton, who already wrote very funny scripts in the first place, and then set about novelising them as memorably as he could. The Myth Makers recasts a minor character as Homer and he recounts the whole thing - or the bits he could plausibly have witnessed, in as sardonic a fashion as he can muster. The Gunfighters hands the whole thing to an ageing Doc Holliday, who remembers it in his distinctly booze-sodden cowboy way. Now we get The Romans - scripted by Dennis Spooner, but perhaps the most knockabout comedy of the three. And Cotton goes for broke: we get around half a dozen viewpoints as the tale comes to us in a series of letters. As it’s Donald Cotton, they’re all quite acerbic and terribly funny.
The Romans, both on screen and in print, has a bit of a rep. It’s knowingly a farce, so it doesn’t fit with a lot of fans’ Doctor Who worldview. The novelisation bears little resemblance to anything else in the Target range. However, more fool the other books. So many dreary stories could have an interesting second life if the author put their stamp on them like this. Hell, they should have let Donald Cotton adapt more scripts. Wouldn’t you rather read The Mutants from the whimsical viewpoint of its demented baddie? Might Underworld move a bit quicker if the Greek mythology came to the front, and a pompous balladeer told you the whole thing?
We’ll never know. But The Romans, which was already a funny and well-paced adventure, only sharpens when split into different narratives. It becomes even funnier that the Doctor thinks Ian and Barbara are safe in their villa this whole time - even ignoring the entreaties of a slave at an auction who looks uncannily like Barbara - and heightens the moral greyness of the character at that time when he, for example, accidentally lets a lot of lions loose in a colosseum, but isn’t that bothered because his would-be assassin is still in there.
The only negative I can think of is that everyone seems to be completely irritated by everyone else, but since the misunderstandings of the plot have lead to a constant dance of life and death you can sort of forgive bad tempers. If only all Doctor Who books were, if not just like this, at least as considered as this.
In comes Donald Cotton, who already wrote very funny scripts in the first place, and then set about novelising them as memorably as he could. The Myth Makers recasts a minor character as Homer and he recounts the whole thing - or the bits he could plausibly have witnessed, in as sardonic a fashion as he can muster. The Gunfighters hands the whole thing to an ageing Doc Holliday, who remembers it in his distinctly booze-sodden cowboy way. Now we get The Romans - scripted by Dennis Spooner, but perhaps the most knockabout comedy of the three. And Cotton goes for broke: we get around half a dozen viewpoints as the tale comes to us in a series of letters. As it’s Donald Cotton, they’re all quite acerbic and terribly funny.
The Romans, both on screen and in print, has a bit of a rep. It’s knowingly a farce, so it doesn’t fit with a lot of fans’ Doctor Who worldview. The novelisation bears little resemblance to anything else in the Target range. However, more fool the other books. So many dreary stories could have an interesting second life if the author put their stamp on them like this. Hell, they should have let Donald Cotton adapt more scripts. Wouldn’t you rather read The Mutants from the whimsical viewpoint of its demented baddie? Might Underworld move a bit quicker if the Greek mythology came to the front, and a pompous balladeer told you the whole thing?
We’ll never know. But The Romans, which was already a funny and well-paced adventure, only sharpens when split into different narratives. It becomes even funnier that the Doctor thinks Ian and Barbara are safe in their villa this whole time - even ignoring the entreaties of a slave at an auction who looks uncannily like Barbara - and heightens the moral greyness of the character at that time when he, for example, accidentally lets a lot of lions loose in a colosseum, but isn’t that bothered because his would-be assassin is still in there.
The only negative I can think of is that everyone seems to be completely irritated by everyone else, but since the misunderstandings of the plot have lead to a constant dance of life and death you can sort of forgive bad tempers. If only all Doctor Who books were, if not just like this, at least as considered as this.
January 16, 2025
4,5 ⭐️
Cuando decidí leer este libro, pensaba que sería la típica novelización de TARDIS, es decir, que un narrador en tercera persona me relataría los acontecimientos vistos en el serial “The Romans” de 1965, añadiendo, quizá, un detalle extra o dos. Pero lo que me encontré al empezar fue mucho mejor.
El planteamiento es que el historiador Tácito manda una carta a su editor —vamos a concederle ciertas licencias a este libro, porque lo vale— explicándole por qué no le ha enviado todavía los capítulos de su obra que cubren el gran incendio de Roma del año 64. Resulta que ha encontrado unos documentos sorprendentes escritos por gente que estuvo en la ciudad en los días previos al incendio: el propio emperador Nerón y su esposa, Popea; la envenenadora de la corte neroniana; un legionario a quien han ordenado cometer un asesinato; unos hombres llamados Doctor e Ian Chesterton, y una mujer llamada Barbara Wright. Tácito dice que, de comprobarse la autenticidad de estos documentos, todo lo que se creía saber sobre el incendio del 64 es incorrecto. (Tácito odia con toda su alma a su editor, por cierto, y su prólogo es faltosísimo.
Por tanto, cada capítulo del libro está escrito desde el punto de vista de los personajes arriba mencionados. Cada uno tiene su personalidad, su propia voz, sus chistes internos… Lo que lo hace tremendamente divertido de leer. En especial los capítulos del Doctor y de Nerón, porque ambos tienen un ego desmesurado y un delulu encima que no pueden con él. Los de Ian también están bastante graciosos, porque su intención es escribir una especie de crónica con la que justificarle al director del colegio en que Barbara y él trabajan el motivo de su ausencia.
¿Añade detalles a la trama original del serial? Oh, ya lo creo que sí. Tanto que ni siquiera todos los sucesos suceden exactamente igual que en la serie, lo que me ha sorprendido mucho. Pero eso no es malo, al menos en mi opinión, solo diferente.
Cuando decidí leer este libro, pensaba que sería la típica novelización de TARDIS, es decir, que un narrador en tercera persona me relataría los acontecimientos vistos en el serial “The Romans” de 1965, añadiendo, quizá, un detalle extra o dos. Pero lo que me encontré al empezar fue mucho mejor.
El planteamiento es que el historiador Tácito manda una carta a su editor —vamos a concederle ciertas licencias a este libro, porque lo vale— explicándole por qué no le ha enviado todavía los capítulos de su obra que cubren el gran incendio de Roma del año 64. Resulta que ha encontrado unos documentos sorprendentes escritos por gente que estuvo en la ciudad en los días previos al incendio: el propio emperador Nerón y su esposa, Popea; la envenenadora de la corte neroniana; un legionario a quien han ordenado cometer un asesinato; unos hombres llamados Doctor e Ian Chesterton, y una mujer llamada Barbara Wright. Tácito dice que, de comprobarse la autenticidad de estos documentos, todo lo que se creía saber sobre el incendio del 64 es incorrecto. (Tácito odia con toda su alma a su editor, por cierto, y su prólogo es faltosísimo.
Por tanto, cada capítulo del libro está escrito desde el punto de vista de los personajes arriba mencionados. Cada uno tiene su personalidad, su propia voz, sus chistes internos… Lo que lo hace tremendamente divertido de leer. En especial los capítulos del Doctor y de Nerón, porque ambos tienen un ego desmesurado y un delulu encima que no pueden con él. Los de Ian también están bastante graciosos, porque su intención es escribir una especie de crónica con la que justificarle al director del colegio en que Barbara y él trabajan el motivo de su ausencia.
¿Añade detalles a la trama original del serial? Oh, ya lo creo que sí. Tanto que ni siquiera todos los sucesos suceden exactamente igual que en la serie, lo que me ha sorprendido mucho. Pero eso no es malo, al menos en mi opinión, solo diferente.
April 23, 2024
So this book is written as a series of letters and journal entries from different characters, telling the story through a variety of viewpoints. It's an inspired decision which sets this book apart from the other Target novelisations, and perfectly compliments the story's already humorous tones. The characters all had distinct (and often comic) points-of-view and I felt it made it easy to visualise the action that was going on. 4 stars.
January 24, 2023
As Doctor Who celebrates its sixtieth anniversary later this year, the Target audiobooks line looks to complete the range that began a decade and a half ago. For the first seven months of the year, the range is releasing one story from each classic series Doctor that hasn't seen the audio light of day until now.
And honestly, the range may not get a better classic Who release than the first novel of the year, "The Romans."
After a recent diet of novels did little more than translate the shooting script to the printed page, "The Romans" is a delightful breath of fresh air. Told in epistolatory style, the varying first-person viewpoints are well-done and delightful. Whether it's the Doctor believing that the slave he keeps seeing looks an awful lot like Barbara to Ian wondering if an alternate timeline through his actions and writings to Nero's uncertainty as to whether he rules Britain or not, the shifting perspectives keep you on your toes -- and laughing all the way.
This may be one of the wittiest and laugh-filled entries from the Target line, with Cotton clearly not giving two figs and going for the gusto. This may not please the strictest of fans who want the novel to mimic what the story we got on-screen. However, this one falls into that canon of later Target books that enhanced and deepened the enjoyment of the TV stories. (I can't wait to get to this serial in my current rewatch of the classic series if only to recall the various thought processes and reflections Cotton gives us here).
The audiobook only enhances the enjoyment of this novel, featuring a wide range of talented narrators bringing each person's section delightful to life. The cover gives away which actors appear, though the version I purchased didn't detail who narrated which part (or at least if it did, I didn't look), thus ensuring some smiles and pleasant surprise over the all-too-brief running time of the audiobook.
My only disappointment comes that the audio range couldn't lure William Russell out of retirement to read the portions of the story told from Ian's point of view. But that is just nitpicking what is one of the more enjoyable and delightful entries in this range.
Listening to "The Romans," I now feel I have to listed to Cotton's other two books for the range, though I may take a bit of a gap between then. Right now, most other Target books are going to pale in comparison to this one.
A superb beginning to celebrating sixty years of Doctor Who.
And honestly, the range may not get a better classic Who release than the first novel of the year, "The Romans."
After a recent diet of novels did little more than translate the shooting script to the printed page, "The Romans" is a delightful breath of fresh air. Told in epistolatory style, the varying first-person viewpoints are well-done and delightful. Whether it's the Doctor believing that the slave he keeps seeing looks an awful lot like Barbara to Ian wondering if an alternate timeline through his actions and writings to Nero's uncertainty as to whether he rules Britain or not, the shifting perspectives keep you on your toes -- and laughing all the way.
This may be one of the wittiest and laugh-filled entries from the Target line, with Cotton clearly not giving two figs and going for the gusto. This may not please the strictest of fans who want the novel to mimic what the story we got on-screen. However, this one falls into that canon of later Target books that enhanced and deepened the enjoyment of the TV stories. (I can't wait to get to this serial in my current rewatch of the classic series if only to recall the various thought processes and reflections Cotton gives us here).
The audiobook only enhances the enjoyment of this novel, featuring a wide range of talented narrators bringing each person's section delightful to life. The cover gives away which actors appear, though the version I purchased didn't detail who narrated which part (or at least if it did, I didn't look), thus ensuring some smiles and pleasant surprise over the all-too-brief running time of the audiobook.
My only disappointment comes that the audio range couldn't lure William Russell out of retirement to read the portions of the story told from Ian's point of view. But that is just nitpicking what is one of the more enjoyable and delightful entries in this range.
Listening to "The Romans," I now feel I have to listed to Cotton's other two books for the range, though I may take a bit of a gap between then. Right now, most other Target books are going to pale in comparison to this one.
A superb beginning to celebrating sixty years of Doctor Who.
July 30, 2018
I absolutely adore the TV Episode. The blend of comedy and gravitas storytelling I think was nailed perfectly. You can tell William Hartnell had a personal enjoyment recording this story. The fans were very mixed on this story during its original transmission, and people still are mixed about 'The Romans.'
I can't say the same about the novelisation. I know it's trying to go for something different in the delivery of the story. It goes for internal monologues, diary entries from the point of view of the Doctor and Ian when their stories are being told. It's a cool way to tell the story because it's a historical, so it makes sense; however, I am sadly not a fan and it doesn't work.
Shame.
I can't say the same about the novelisation. I know it's trying to go for something different in the delivery of the story. It goes for internal monologues, diary entries from the point of view of the Doctor and Ian when their stories are being told. It's a cool way to tell the story because it's a historical, so it makes sense; however, I am sadly not a fan and it doesn't work.
Shame.
May 25, 2013
An epistolary tale can be gripping and engaging. But this poor presentation of an otherwise interesting story makes me want to never another of these novelizations again.
And I own all of them.
From letters written by an assassin to his mother, to journal entries somehow kept by an English schoolteacher while chained to an oar in a slave galley, this book tries so hard to prove itself funny and daring that it fails on every level to capture the excitement, humor and action of the original serial, and ultimately just makes you sad.
Avoid this book at all costs.
And I own all of them.
From letters written by an assassin to his mother, to journal entries somehow kept by an English schoolteacher while chained to an oar in a slave galley, this book tries so hard to prove itself funny and daring that it fails on every level to capture the excitement, humor and action of the original serial, and ultimately just makes you sad.
Avoid this book at all costs.
March 22, 2022
I started reading the Target Doctor Who books around 1975 at the age of 7. At the time, they were the only way to experience old serials as it was well before commercially available video recordings. Around the early 1980s as I entered my teens I found other interests and I don’t recall reading them since. In the late ‘80s the videos started to appear and I bought each one as they came out, viewing many stories for the first time. I’ve since collected all the DVDs and now the Blu-rays as they are released. The BBC must love me!
Some time ago I decided to collect all the novelisations. It’s only in the last couple of months though that I have decided to read them in transmission order. I’ve been alternating two targets to one other, more demanding book. At around 140 pages each they are an easy read; a pleasant way to spend an hour or two. I had no plans to do any reviews because at the end of the day they’re aimed at 14 year olds and they’re adaptations of TV stories – plenty of wheezing, groaning materialisations from the TARDIS and fast paced, easy to follow storylines. Experimentation didn’t happen until the New Adventures, right?
That was what I thought until I read The Romans… I hated this book so much that I feel the urge to write a review to analyse why.
The Romans is the third (and final) Doctor Who book by Donald Cotton, based on a script by Dennis Spooner. The story is a parody of Quo Vadis. It was transmitted between 16/1/1965 and 6/2/1965 and the novel was published in September 1987. For completeness, the VHS was released Sept 1994 and the DVD in February 2009. In the DWM poll of 1998 the story was placed 111 of 160; in the 2013 poll it was 131 of 241. So it’s not a Genesis of the Daleks style classic, but it’s not a Twin Dilemma style clunker either.
Donald Cotton (1928-1999) wrote, often in a comedic manner, for stage, radio and TV. He was invited to write for Doctor Who by an old acquaintance, story editor Donald Tosh, who with incoming producer John Wiles, wanted to push the boundaries of Doctor Who. They wanted Cotton to deliver a historical high comedy, which he duly delivered as the Myth Makers. Tosh and Wiles were impressed and commissioned another, which became the Gunfighters. After Tosh and Wiles both resigned in December 1965, the incoming team of Gerry Davis and Innes Lloyd disliked both historicals and comedies in Doctor Who. Consequently Cotton never wrote for Doctor Who again (apart from a rejected outline). He went on to co-create Adam Adamant Lives! (which was developed by DW creator Sydney Newman, had original DW Producer Verity Lambert, and also had an episode directed by a young Ridley Scott!)
His first two novelisations are of his own stories, the Myth Makers was released in April 1985 and the Gunfighters the following July. He was asked to adapt the Romans because of its openly comedic elements. (It’s original writer, Dennis Spooner, had passed away in 1986 and anyway had not been involved in any of his story’s Target novelisations, continuing through his career to work in TV, contributing to some very famous programmes).
Cotton chose to present the Romans in the first person through various characters’ letters and documents. Nothing wrong with that idea, but it makes the story actually quite difficult to follow (just as well the episodes still exist!). That’s not the big problem though.
There are two really serious issues I have with Cotton’s adaptation. One is the absolutely awful characterisation. This was Vicki’s first full story and she’s presented as little more than an irritant to an almost unrecognisable Doctor, who constantly misreads situations and congratulates himself on how clever he is while demeaning others. Ian also suffers in this manner. There is no indication of his friendship with any of the other TARDIS occupants, especially Barbara. Seriously, why would he write a journal to his old Headmaster? I found myself reading his sections in the Michael Palin character’s voice in the Monty Python’s Flying Circus Cycling Tour episode (s03e08), particularly the gladiator section, Document XVI, p67-71. This story is the 12th full serial of Doctor Who. Three of the TARDÍS crew have been together all that time, through numerous perils. You would think they hardly knew each other from the way they behave in this book.
My second issue is that someone at the publisher seemed to forget to tell Donald about the age group the book was aimed at. It is ridiculously wordy. I appreciate it’s supposed to be for comic effect but “concatination”? Throughout the book I was reaching for a dictionary! If I was a teen I’d have stopped reading. The wordiness added nothing to the comedy or the story-telling, in my opinion.
Here’s a paragraph from page 46…
“High-rise temples, where priests ponder their impenetrable penetralia, impossibly jostle with unimaginably impractical palaces, fumbling for a foothold amongst a crawling sprawl of tenebrous tenements; inimical, I would say, to any proper sense of community in the populace, who seem for the most part an ill-kempt lot and ripe for revolution, if the Praetorian Guards were prepared to let them get away with it!”
I can’t see Terrance Dicks writing that!
Perhaps the novelisation being written 22 years after the original transmission is also part of the problem. The show had changed beyond all recognition (as had society) in the intervening period. The author was also 58/59 years old at the time of writing. Tastes had changed. Apparently the Gunfighters is also epistolary in style. I hope it’s better than this tripe, which must surely be amongst the worst of the DW Target books. I’ll be very surprised if I come across anything worse in my forthcoming trawl through them. I’ll certainly not be revisiting The Romans in book form again.
Some time ago I decided to collect all the novelisations. It’s only in the last couple of months though that I have decided to read them in transmission order. I’ve been alternating two targets to one other, more demanding book. At around 140 pages each they are an easy read; a pleasant way to spend an hour or two. I had no plans to do any reviews because at the end of the day they’re aimed at 14 year olds and they’re adaptations of TV stories – plenty of wheezing, groaning materialisations from the TARDIS and fast paced, easy to follow storylines. Experimentation didn’t happen until the New Adventures, right?
That was what I thought until I read The Romans… I hated this book so much that I feel the urge to write a review to analyse why.
The Romans is the third (and final) Doctor Who book by Donald Cotton, based on a script by Dennis Spooner. The story is a parody of Quo Vadis. It was transmitted between 16/1/1965 and 6/2/1965 and the novel was published in September 1987. For completeness, the VHS was released Sept 1994 and the DVD in February 2009. In the DWM poll of 1998 the story was placed 111 of 160; in the 2013 poll it was 131 of 241. So it’s not a Genesis of the Daleks style classic, but it’s not a Twin Dilemma style clunker either.
Donald Cotton (1928-1999) wrote, often in a comedic manner, for stage, radio and TV. He was invited to write for Doctor Who by an old acquaintance, story editor Donald Tosh, who with incoming producer John Wiles, wanted to push the boundaries of Doctor Who. They wanted Cotton to deliver a historical high comedy, which he duly delivered as the Myth Makers. Tosh and Wiles were impressed and commissioned another, which became the Gunfighters. After Tosh and Wiles both resigned in December 1965, the incoming team of Gerry Davis and Innes Lloyd disliked both historicals and comedies in Doctor Who. Consequently Cotton never wrote for Doctor Who again (apart from a rejected outline). He went on to co-create Adam Adamant Lives! (which was developed by DW creator Sydney Newman, had original DW Producer Verity Lambert, and also had an episode directed by a young Ridley Scott!)
His first two novelisations are of his own stories, the Myth Makers was released in April 1985 and the Gunfighters the following July. He was asked to adapt the Romans because of its openly comedic elements. (It’s original writer, Dennis Spooner, had passed away in 1986 and anyway had not been involved in any of his story’s Target novelisations, continuing through his career to work in TV, contributing to some very famous programmes).
Cotton chose to present the Romans in the first person through various characters’ letters and documents. Nothing wrong with that idea, but it makes the story actually quite difficult to follow (just as well the episodes still exist!). That’s not the big problem though.
There are two really serious issues I have with Cotton’s adaptation. One is the absolutely awful characterisation. This was Vicki’s first full story and she’s presented as little more than an irritant to an almost unrecognisable Doctor, who constantly misreads situations and congratulates himself on how clever he is while demeaning others. Ian also suffers in this manner. There is no indication of his friendship with any of the other TARDIS occupants, especially Barbara. Seriously, why would he write a journal to his old Headmaster? I found myself reading his sections in the Michael Palin character’s voice in the Monty Python’s Flying Circus Cycling Tour episode (s03e08), particularly the gladiator section, Document XVI, p67-71. This story is the 12th full serial of Doctor Who. Three of the TARDÍS crew have been together all that time, through numerous perils. You would think they hardly knew each other from the way they behave in this book.
My second issue is that someone at the publisher seemed to forget to tell Donald about the age group the book was aimed at. It is ridiculously wordy. I appreciate it’s supposed to be for comic effect but “concatination”? Throughout the book I was reaching for a dictionary! If I was a teen I’d have stopped reading. The wordiness added nothing to the comedy or the story-telling, in my opinion.
Here’s a paragraph from page 46…
“High-rise temples, where priests ponder their impenetrable penetralia, impossibly jostle with unimaginably impractical palaces, fumbling for a foothold amongst a crawling sprawl of tenebrous tenements; inimical, I would say, to any proper sense of community in the populace, who seem for the most part an ill-kempt lot and ripe for revolution, if the Praetorian Guards were prepared to let them get away with it!”
I can’t see Terrance Dicks writing that!
Perhaps the novelisation being written 22 years after the original transmission is also part of the problem. The show had changed beyond all recognition (as had society) in the intervening period. The author was also 58/59 years old at the time of writing. Tastes had changed. Apparently the Gunfighters is also epistolary in style. I hope it’s better than this tripe, which must surely be amongst the worst of the DW Target books. I’ll be very surprised if I come across anything worse in my forthcoming trawl through them. I’ll certainly not be revisiting The Romans in book form again.
December 9, 2024
Donald Cotton's Doctor Who (and) The Romans was perhaps the Target novelisation I was most excited about by reputation. And it lives up to the hype. Written as a satirical epistolary novel, we are handed a collection of documents in various characters' own voices that tell the story, often in unreliable narration that could help explain why Cotton keeps the main beats, but completely changes the details. Under his pen, the assassin is a legionnaire with mommy issues instead of a subverbal caveman. Ian's Greek ally is a 8-foot Olympian who doesn't like Ian so much. He changes some beloved scenes for entirely new humorous ones so that the episodes and the book each stand alone, neither necessarily better than the other, and therefore both relevant. Sadly, Barbara seldom writes a document (Vicki never does), so she's mostly seen through others' eyes. Where Cotton does improve the story is in lending more humor to the straightforward moments of violence - the slavers don't come with swords but with a con, the arena is more grandiose and has more comedy of errors - and it also gives the leads more agency in some matters. The prose is verbose, alliterative and clever, and might send you running to your dictionary, so it's a lot of fun. Might end up being my favorite Target of all time.
October 13, 2023
This was a part of my 60th Anniversary read-throughs of classic Who. I started with an unearthly child and have now read to this 4th story of the second season. So far, this has been the worst of the Target novels I have read so far. I give credit for attempting something different, but this did not work. The story is told as if from a collection of manuscripts from the diaries and letters of both the main cast and the Romans themselves. It is very distracting, full of lame attempts at humor, stuff that didn’t makes sense, plot holes, etc. All in all I did not like it, but it is blessedly short and easy to skim. Next up, The Web Planet! aka Doctor Who and the Zarbi, Target #73. Interesting note. Target didn’t decide to number their books until late in the game, and so the gave the numbers in alphabetical order up to the time of this new policy. Doctor who and the Zarbi is the last of the alphabetized group for Target’s initial books. Everything after is numbered as they are published.
December 19, 2025
‘Doctor Who: The Romans’ by Donald Cotton was written in 1987. ‘Doctor Who: The Romans’ is based on the 12th television serial of ‘Doctor Who’ which is the fourth adventure of the second season of the first doctor played by William Hartnell. ‘Doctor Who: The Romans’ is a comedy adventure and centres around the Doctor and his companions, Ian, Barbara and Vicki travelling back to Ancient Rome and there experiences there including with Emperor Nero.
‘Doctor Who: The Romans’ is now out of print so I listened to the audiobook narrated by a lot of different actors reading the different characters. This was a really good audiobook as the story is told as a form of diary entries by the different characters and I felt the actor who portrayed WIlliam Hartnell’s Doctor was uncanny with his characterisation and voicing of the Doctor. This is a very funny book in places. A good read for a ‘Doctor Who’ fan.
‘Doctor Who: The Romans’ is now out of print so I listened to the audiobook narrated by a lot of different actors reading the different characters. This was a really good audiobook as the story is told as a form of diary entries by the different characters and I felt the actor who portrayed WIlliam Hartnell’s Doctor was uncanny with his characterisation and voicing of the Doctor. This is a very funny book in places. A good read for a ‘Doctor Who’ fan.
February 9, 2024
pdf; 93 pages
On screen a comedy (of errors?) of sorts here the narrative is presented in the form of an epistolary novel, with various letters and journal extracts covering the salient plot points. The crew are separated early on - Doctor takes Vicki to Rome on an educational visit, Barbara is taken by slavers, as is Ian, who ends up shackled to a galley rowing bench. Eventually they reach the Rome - where Nero is smitten with Barbara, the Doctor is assumed to be the famous musician/lyrist Maximus Petullian, despite his lack of accomplishment on that instrument, Ian is shipwrecked and then ends up in the arena, Vicki briefly apprentices with the Palace poisoner...
Actual historical accuracy is slight - but it's an engagingly quick read, somewhat different in style to the usual novelisations.
On screen a comedy (of errors?) of sorts here the narrative is presented in the form of an epistolary novel, with various letters and journal extracts covering the salient plot points. The crew are separated early on - Doctor takes Vicki to Rome on an educational visit, Barbara is taken by slavers, as is Ian, who ends up shackled to a galley rowing bench. Eventually they reach the Rome - where Nero is smitten with Barbara, the Doctor is assumed to be the famous musician/lyrist Maximus Petullian, despite his lack of accomplishment on that instrument, Ian is shipwrecked and then ends up in the arena, Vicki briefly apprentices with the Palace poisoner...
Actual historical accuracy is slight - but it's an engagingly quick read, somewhat different in style to the usual novelisations.
January 20, 2021
Somewhere between a 2 and a 3 for me. The TV story was an unusually comedic one, which isn't bad sometimes as a change of pace, but I don't think Doctor Who would have been anywhere near as long lasting if always like that.
But the novel seems to take this even further, and the style of narration as such really extends the sitcom sort of aspect to it, and a bit further than I would like. Towards the end at least the different perspectives intertwined well, but before that it really just seemed a bit disjointed, and a bit too forced in trying to find the humour, which the TV story from memory did better.
But the novel seems to take this even further, and the style of narration as such really extends the sitcom sort of aspect to it, and a bit further than I would like. Towards the end at least the different perspectives intertwined well, but before that it really just seemed a bit disjointed, and a bit too forced in trying to find the humour, which the TV story from memory did better.
September 11, 2017
Probably the most entertaining Doctor book I have read so far. I liked that the author wrote the book in a series of journal entries/letters and such. It was a creative way to do it. And it was hilarious to hear things through the Doctor's point of view, especially since most books he seems callous and mean. It almost had a Terry Pratchett feel to it. The downside of this book is that it contains a majority of Roman story cliches. It's one big cliche, so much so I wonder if it was suppose to be a parody.
January 11, 2023
Doctor Who : The Romans (1987) by Douglas Cotton is the novelisation of fourth serial the second series of Doctor Who. The companions are Vicki, Barbara and Ian.
The Doctor and crew land in ancient Rome and proceed to get split up, meet Nero, get captured by slavers, get into a shipwreck, avoid getting assasinated, get chased by lions and compose music for Nero.
The book is written in diary segments from the point of view of various characters involved. It’s different, fun and it works.
The Romans is a fun Doctor Who book. Well worth it.
The Doctor and crew land in ancient Rome and proceed to get split up, meet Nero, get captured by slavers, get into a shipwreck, avoid getting assasinated, get chased by lions and compose music for Nero.
The book is written in diary segments from the point of view of various characters involved. It’s different, fun and it works.
The Romans is a fun Doctor Who book. Well worth it.
May 19, 2024
Well, that was … different. I can’t decide if this was a serious attempt to do a new style of novelisation or if he was taking the piss because he didn’t want to write it but had a contractual obligation.
I don’t object to the idea of the tale being told through a series of diary extracts and letters, but the tone throughout doesn’t sound like any of the established characters. There are large parts of the broadcast version missing, large parts heavily modified, and entirely new sections not in the TV version.
I think it’s trying to be comedy as the Nero in the TV version was a bit over the top. It doesn’t work for me. This is a book ripe for a new, more sensible, edition.
I don’t object to the idea of the tale being told through a series of diary extracts and letters, but the tone throughout doesn’t sound like any of the established characters. There are large parts of the broadcast version missing, large parts heavily modified, and entirely new sections not in the TV version.
I think it’s trying to be comedy as the Nero in the TV version was a bit over the top. It doesn’t work for me. This is a book ripe for a new, more sensible, edition.
October 7, 2025
If you take this in the lighthearted manner it was written in, it is an entertaining book. The old t.v. serial this is based off of was meant to be a comedy and although I really liked it l, I think the book did it better. I enjoyed that the story was told through the Doctor’s pretentious diary entries, Nero’s self deluded scrapbook, Poppea’s scheming commonplace book, and, my favorite, Ian’s long winded journal entries to the headmaster. Seeing these hilarious events through the serious and flabbergasted eyes of the characters highlighted the farce this was meant to be.
March 30, 2019
An ok adaptation of a Hartnell story. Unfortunately, most of the comedic sequences seem to have been missed out ( Ian and Barbara winding each other up about getting ice from the freezer etc), and the almost constant use of alliteration becomes somewhat distracting. Having said that, Cotton tells the story very well, and the prose is certainly not dumbed down for younger readers. Very much worth reading.
May 18, 2021
Much like the television version, I wish Nero as a creep wasn't played so much for laughs. Mostly I really enjoyed this though, definitely a standout in terms of the novelisations I've read so far. It's very different from the version on TV in a lot of ways, but I personally like that - it makes them feel more like they can exist side-by-side, rather than one or the other standing in for each other.
April 10, 2023
Such historical shenanigans! I was half-expecting someone to pop up and say, “Carry on, Doctor.” This is a bit of a hoot, and the ridiculous conceit of it being constructed of “historical documents” such as letters and journal entries makes it even funnier. I seem to recall a the time of publication that some fans didn’t quite, er, Cotton (sorry) to this particular style of novelisation, but we are a fairly hidebound breed at times.
May 8, 2018
42 WORD REVIEW:
Without reference to the televised serial, this odd and irreverent epistolary novelisation comes across as something of a fever dream. Even in context, it takes liberties in elevating and expanding upon the plot’s farcical elements. Nonetheless, a funny and uncommonly erudite read.
Without reference to the televised serial, this odd and irreverent epistolary novelisation comes across as something of a fever dream. Even in context, it takes liberties in elevating and expanding upon the plot’s farcical elements. Nonetheless, a funny and uncommonly erudite read.
October 31, 2022
An amusing and unusual retelling of the 1st Doctor story The Romans.
The story is told using a variety of diary entries, letters and extracts from autobiographies.
The Doctor's journal entries are sublime, as are Chesterton's letters to the headmaster of Coal Hill School.
Quite probably my favourite Target novelisation.
The story is told using a variety of diary entries, letters and extracts from autobiographies.
The Doctor's journal entries are sublime, as are Chesterton's letters to the headmaster of Coal Hill School.
Quite probably my favourite Target novelisation.
October 7, 2024
Verbally dexterous, epistolary, and ambitiously deviating from the TV story with fresh dialogue and jokes, this is an intelligent and scant read that will tire those who dislike long sentences but please those who enjoy lexical prowess.
March 30, 2021
A fantastic edition to the novelized Dr. Who collection, and the only one to be written in a journal like format. Each chapter is written through the perspective of another character which makes this a definite page turner that I recommend to all Doctor Who fans alike.
January 13, 2023
http://nhw.livejournal.com/1021250.html
I had been looking forward to this one, famed as one of the best Doctor Who novelisations, and I was not disappointed. Cotton has recast the narrative of Dennis Spooner’s TV script into epistolary/diary form: letters from Ian Chesterton to his headmaster, the Doctor’s own diary, letters from Ascalis the assassin and Locusta the poisoner, and contributions also from Barbara, the Emperor Nero, and Nero’s wife Poppæa (but not Vicki); the whole thing framed in a covering note by Tacitus (obviously written several decades later). Eye of Heaven, the best of the spinoff novels featuring Leela, also featured multiple first-person viewpoints, and I’ve read first-person narratives in other First Doctor stories, but this is the only case of the whole thing being ostensibly done from written records (the Doctor having compiled everything and then left it behind in the villa for the archivists to discover).
Admittedly, as an actual story it’s no great shakes, and purists will be disappointed that we lose a lot of the funny lines from the TV version and one of its major comic elements (the two pairs of time travellers not actually meeting each other in their wanderings). But the whole thing is done for language and laughs; it’s meant to be fun, and it is fun, and that’s all you can really ask.
https://fromtheheartofeurope.eu/the-romans-by-jacob-edwareds-and-dennis-spooner-and-donald-cotton/
Now that I’ve read almost all of the Doctor Who novelisations (apart from the very latest ones), I appreciate even more the imaginative flexibility that Cotton was allowed to bring to the story. But it’s interesting that the Ian Chesterton of the novel is clearly a teacher at a minor public school, rather than the secondary modern or comprehensive Coal Hill that we see on screen. It’s also regrettable that the women characters don’t get as much bandwidth on the page as they did on screen.
I had been looking forward to this one, famed as one of the best Doctor Who novelisations, and I was not disappointed. Cotton has recast the narrative of Dennis Spooner’s TV script into epistolary/diary form: letters from Ian Chesterton to his headmaster, the Doctor’s own diary, letters from Ascalis the assassin and Locusta the poisoner, and contributions also from Barbara, the Emperor Nero, and Nero’s wife Poppæa (but not Vicki); the whole thing framed in a covering note by Tacitus (obviously written several decades later). Eye of Heaven, the best of the spinoff novels featuring Leela, also featured multiple first-person viewpoints, and I’ve read first-person narratives in other First Doctor stories, but this is the only case of the whole thing being ostensibly done from written records (the Doctor having compiled everything and then left it behind in the villa for the archivists to discover).
Admittedly, as an actual story it’s no great shakes, and purists will be disappointed that we lose a lot of the funny lines from the TV version and one of its major comic elements (the two pairs of time travellers not actually meeting each other in their wanderings). But the whole thing is done for language and laughs; it’s meant to be fun, and it is fun, and that’s all you can really ask.
https://fromtheheartofeurope.eu/the-romans-by-jacob-edwareds-and-dennis-spooner-and-donald-cotton/
Now that I’ve read almost all of the Doctor Who novelisations (apart from the very latest ones), I appreciate even more the imaginative flexibility that Cotton was allowed to bring to the story. But it’s interesting that the Ian Chesterton of the novel is clearly a teacher at a minor public school, rather than the secondary modern or comprehensive Coal Hill that we see on screen. It’s also regrettable that the women characters don’t get as much bandwidth on the page as they did on screen.
December 25, 2010
I found this book in a box while I was cleaning in the Garage. I am not sure why I saved the book, but I decided to give it a read. While I am sure this Doctor Who adventure made for great TV. The book version of this adventure was a rather disorganized read. The story is told from "discovered" historical documents or diary entries. This taints the story drasticly from one characters point of view to the other. This point of view might have been interesting at one time, but I found it very anoying in this case. The characters are all ignorant of their surroundings, very opinionated and for the most part totally delusional as to what is happening around them. It was a bit anoying while I'm sure the writer of the book was trying to be amusing.
Do not get me wrong, the book is amusing and a very very fast short read. The book is so short that any problems can be over looked simply because you will be done so quickly.
Do not get me wrong, the book is amusing and a very very fast short read. The book is so short that any problems can be over looked simply because you will be done so quickly.
July 11, 2014
This novelization is even funnier and more lighthearted than the original story. Of Donald Cotton’s three novelizations, all humorous, The Myth Makers is the best. But The Romans has a farcical humor to it that makes it an enjoyable read. Especially humorous are Ian’s “diary” entries addressed to his former Coal Hill schoolmaster, that describe the various life-threatening predicaments he has been forced to endure as a Roman slave. There is much murder and intrigue about, but it’s handled so funnily that it doesn’t come across as graphic. The story takes place in Nero’s Rome, just before the Great Fire, and, uniquely, for a Doctor Who book, is told in letters and diary entries from the main characters, all framed by the story of Tacitus trying to compile all of the documents together to send to his doubtful publisher. Vicki is underused, and the Doctor is mostly unwitting and bumbling here.
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