The Sleep Sense Program -- Proven Strategies For Teaching Your Child To Sleep Through The Night

by Dana Obleman

The Fastest, Easiest & Most Gentle Way To Get YOUR Child Sleeping Through The Night

“Baby won’t sleep? If you’re the parent of a baby (or older child) who isn’t sleeping through the night, you owe It to yourself to check out The Sleep Sense Program by Dana Obleman.”

First published in 2005, it’s a step-by-step system that over 32,000 parents have trusted to teach their babies and toddlers how to fall asleep on their own... and sleep through the night!

The Sleep Sense Program gives you everything you need to solve common sleep problems like:

Your child will ONLY fall asleep when nursing or bottle feeding. This is one of the most common causes of sleep problems, and you'll learn how to fix it quickly! Your child needs a soother or pacifier in order to get to sleep. Of course, whenever that soother falls out, YOU'RE the one who has to go put it back in.  You are waking up with your child once, twice, three (or more) times each night. The reason? Your little one needs to learn to fall asleep WITHOUT your help. You'll learn a few different strategies for solving this. Your child needs to be rocked, bounced, or taken for a car ride in order to nap. Or (even worse) your child seems to REFUSE to take a nap -- despite the fact that he or she seems tired.  Your OWN lack of sleep is starting to take a toll on you and your family. Studies prove that infant sleep problems are closely linked to postpartum depression. 

… and much more!

What makes The Sleep Sense Program SO Effective?

While many other books use a “one-size-fits-all” approach, The Sleep Sense Program shows you the exact method you should use based on two important factors:

Your child’s age, and Your child’s personality.

For example, the approach a parent of a sensitive 3-month-old should take is VERY different from the one you’d use for a stubborn 2-year-old!

More Than Just Getting Your Baby To Sleep At Night

Yes, The Sleep Sense Program will teach you how to get your child to fall asleep (and stay asleep) at night, but there’s also special sections on:

Sleep issues when travelling Sleep adjustments in case of illness How to make naps longer How to make bedtime stress-free How to create a sleep sanctuary for your child

In short, The Sleep Sense Program by Dana Obleman really DOES give you everything you need to get your child sleeping through the night!

Compelling Reasons Why You Should Teach Your Baby To Sleep Well:

Sleep experts and pediatricians agree that a good night's sleep is SO important for babies and young children. Consider these statistics:

Children who sleep longer have higher IQs. (Sleep Med. 2010 March 11) Children who get at least 10.5 hours of sleep per night are significantly less likely to be obese. (Pediatrics.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

250 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2007

Reviews

[Joni · Rating 5 out of 5]

I liked this one because it was written in plain English, got to the point without any extra fluff, and the strategies included just made sense to me. It's only available as a PDF through the Sleep Sense website (it's not a book), but I think it will work well for me in conjunction with some of the things I've picked up from the other books I've read.

Update: this was hands-down the most helpful resource for getting my baby to sleep through the night (which she started doing at about 11-12 weeks of age). The unfortunate reality of sleep training is that it will take some crying (definitely from the baby and possibly from the mom), but for me it was worth it. By no means did I just make my baby "cry it out," and that is not what this book teaches. But there was about a week of rough nights with crying and then suddenly, it just clicked and now I put my daughter into her crib AWAKE, and she falls asleep on her own, and sleeps for 11-12 hours. Sometimes she will stir or even wake up in the night, but she almost always puts herself right back to sleep on her own. Such a blessing for a tired working mom!!!

[Andrea · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have read quite a few books on helping your baby sleep through the night. It has been so hard because I don't want to let him "cry it out" but this book has some GREAT ideas. It's perfect for me because it teaches him to fall asleep on his own but with me in the room. I love that because then he knows that I am there and haven't left him alone but at the same time, I let him work it out on his own. I hate that I have to let him cry but at the same time, I am allowed to briefly give him support and love. After following the program for 10 days, he now sleeps 11 hours straight!! Before this he woke up 2 to 3 times a night! I am a new woman!

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

For the first 8 weeks of Jamie’s life, the struggle to achieve successful and sustainable breastfeeding consumed me. Several subpar weighted feeds with the IBLC convinced me that he was not transferring enough milk. As a result, every time he was fussy, I assumed that he was hungry and we gave him an extra “dessert bottle” to supplement. I was pumping up to 9x a day to keep up. It turns out that he was getting plenty of milk (gaining over and above the recommended 1 oz per day). It was not until several weeks later that I realized the fussiness happening an hour after he ate was overtiredness, not hunger. He had never really seemed to sleep the ~18-20 hours a day that newborns are supposed to, which I thought was a result of a personality trait, and not of our failure to pay attention to wake windows and provide him the opportunity to nap at the right moments.

I learned a lot from this book that I want to try, including the following at bedtime:
- Put him to bed earlier, between 7-8pm
- Do a consistent 20-30 bedtime routine in the bedroom. We will try: read 1-2 books > milk > diaper change > song > say “goodnight Jamie”
- The first night results in an average of 45 minutes of crying but might be up to 2 hours. Second night crying average is 25 minutes; third night crying average is 15 minutes. There may be ups and downs for weeks
- If baby wakes in the night, wait 10 minutes to see if he will go back to sleep. Then try voice soothing. Then try gentle touch. If you must pick up, delay gratification. Change the diaper and walk around. Baby will be less likely to associate waking up with the immediate gratification of milk. When you do give milk, do it in the dark nursery and ensure baby stays awake. Put him back to bed calm and awake!
- If baby wakes at 5am, treat it like a nighttime waking. If baby wakes at 6am or after, treat it like the start of the day. Give the first feeding of the day in the living room or kitchen to signal day has begun

For naps, I want to try:
- Naps should happen at the same time each day and in the same place he sleeps at night
- Naptime routine should be 5-10 minutes. We will try book > song > say “goodnight Jamie.” At the end of the routine, put baby in crib calm, awake, and without a pacifier
- If you put baby down for nap and he does not sleep, wait 1 hour and 10 minutes (checking on him with voice or gentle touch as often as you like, or not at all). When 70 minutes have passed, take baby out for 20-30 minutes of playtime and then go back to attempt a nap. If another 1 hour and 10 minutes passes and he has still not slept, do an “emergency contact nap”
- If baby wakes up after a short nap (anything less than 1 hour), wait 10-15 minutes before you even go into his room. Then go in and try voice or gentle touch. If 30 minutes passes and he has not gone back to sleep, get him up. You might have to move up the next nap to compensate

“Letting your child live in a perpetual state of tiredness is far worse than letting him cry for an hour or so over a few days.”

“Although children are constantly testing and pushing their boundaries, they are always very reassured when they discover that the rules have stayed the same.”

Thank you so much to Bill, Haley, and Emma for sharing this resource!!

[Robyn · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars. The preamble in this book was very boring. Part of it was just an ad for itself and the authors sleep program she is selling and part of it is very basic sleep knowledge and examples to explain basic sleep knowledge. It was repetitive and I only read the chapters that pertained to me. I have a 4 month old so I didn’t read the chapters on 1 year+ and 0-3 month olds or on twins. She has kind of a narrow view on what works for families. And I really don’t like her nap time method. I would recommend Richard Ferber’s sleep book over hers. I am not even done his book yet but he sounds much more knowledgeable about sleep. Their night time methods are very similar, though Ferber offers more options for varying sleeping arrangements.
I do like some of her bedtime routine suggestions though.

[Amanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I debated buying this many times with my son but wasn't sure it would really help. When my daughter was 18 months old and still getting up five times a night, I reached the point that I simply had to try something. Within a week, she was getting up once at most and now is consistently sleeping 11-12 hours straight. It's not rocket science, but it is a clear, step by step plan. And if you're like me and completely sleep deprived, you need someone to just give you a plan.

[Lisa London · Rating 4 out of 5]

This method of sleep training truly does work if you put in the time and effort! Dana answers all the questions lingering in the backs of parents' minds about baby sleep and crying. Not giving this five stars because the writing itself has multiple spelling and grammatical errors which need some editing.

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

So many sleep training books—where to turn?! I was referred to Dana Obleman’s Sleep Sense by a friend in my Mommy group and I am so glad she told me about this. I’m on Day 8 of using the Sleep Sense and so far it has been working for me and my family. After reading practically all of the different methods, this one isn’t so new and groundbreaking but I like that it’s eclectic. My absolute favorite is that if you purchase specific packages (decent prices too!) you get daily videos, phone support, email support, and multiple books. I felt supported the whole way through. Whenever I had a question, somewhere in the book or videos it was answered.

[Claire Grant · Rating 4 out of 5]

In society today people won’t allow their babies to cry because it “damages them”. I was so against sleep training initially, but when you’re waking 15 times a night because your baby can’t self soothe, and you’re so sleep deprived… it’s a form of torture. I got recommended this book and I’m a few days into the program and it’s changed my life. My four month old can already self soothe. He sleeps through the night with a quick feed in the middle. His day sleeps are longer than 35mins. I’m also a better mum and he’s a happy baby. Read it, and teach your baby to self soothe. Teaching your baby to self soothe is not harmful, it’s teaching him his first skill in life.

[Arwen Telian · Rating 3 out of 5]

I thought the book was well written, and had the added benefit of getting to the point, which many books on this topic don't do. But, the book isn't saying anything new, I found the exact same info on many parenting websites, for free! She does package it in a way that you feel less guilty for letting your child cry, and many parents need that.
Unfortunately, I cannot rigidly follow her advice, as there is something intrinsically wrong about hearing my baby cry, and not going to his aid. Her advice is sound though, and I will be incorporating some of her advice into my little one's sleep time routine.
One last thing, I read the ebook, and found it a bit off putting that every chapter ended with her offering a discount for her full package (videos, helpline, et al).

[Steph B · Rating 2 out of 5]

Personally, I would not recommend anyone buy this. The author is highly repetitive; literally repeating the exact same thing over and over - in one case the next sentence even, just worded slightly different. She contradicts her own written words throughout. Lastly, the same information is available everywhere through a simple Google search. I gave her 2 stars because the basis of the book, and the overall information (if you remove all the repetition) is a decent book with solid and valid suggestions to try.

[Lottie · Rating 1 out of 5]

cryi it out with extra steps or sacrificing your childs trust just to get a better sleep or based on scientific research without proper resources

terrible

might work on some choldren but definetly that is a 1 of 1000000 chance

[Riin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Väga asjalik ja toetav raamat, kuidas õpetada last läbi öö magama. Kõik inimesed ärkavad öö jooksul korduvalt, aga me oskame kohe magama jääda. Beebidele/väikelastele tuleb seda õpetada - kes oleks võinud arvata 😃
Eeldasin, et 1-aastane laps võiks seda ise osata. Vb mõned oskavad. Kuna Marie (1a1k) ei oska öö läbi magada, ja tema öised ärkamised on hakanud mind negatiivselt mõjutama (päevane unisus ja mälu halvenemine jm), alustasime hiljaaegu selle õppeprotsessiga.

Üsna lühikese aja jooksul sai Marie iseseisvalt juba paari minutiga ööunne (meie juuresolekul ja toetusega, paitamine jms). Probleeme on veel öiste ärkamistega, aga raamat õpetas meeles hoidma, et õpetan lapsele olulist oskust kogu eluks - iseseisvalt ja rahulikult uinumist.
Osa asju oli raamatus vastukäivad mu mõtetele ja teistele uneteooriatele (nt päevauni peaks siis lapsel ka olema kodus ja võrevoodis, mitte nt õues ja kärutades - siis ei saaks ju kuskil jalutades käia!)

Mõned nõuanded veel:
* ole järjepidev
* jälgi unerituaali (raamatud, õhtune pesu jm) - laps teab, mida oodata ja mis järjekorras
* töötage kaasaga koos tiimina, tehke kasvõi 20-minutilisi vahetusi, kui laps on öösel üleval
* Laps nutab voodisse pannes, kuna see on uus olukord talle, et peab olema voodis ärkvel. Kui ta õpib ära, et tema paneb end ise magama, ilma kõrvalise abita, siis läheb ta edaspidi kiiremini ja nututa tuttu
* ole tugev! Esimesed ööd on kõige keerulisemad, siis annavad paljud alla ja laps õpib sellest, et järgmine kord nutab ta kauem, et saada oma tahtmist. Nii juhtus ka meil, et andsin alla. Aga loomulikult ei kadunud mu probleemid sellega ära. Loodan, et suudame sel korral paremini

[Jess · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is great. I’m about to have my first child and read the book proactively to help me instill healthy sleep habits from the start.

The overall message of this book is to train your child to fall sleep on their own—instead of them relying on you to fall asleep. If you nurse them, rock them, or sing to them until they fall asleep, they’ll learn they need you in order to fall asleep. This means when they awaken in the middle of the night, they’ll cry for you to help them get back to sleep because it’s the only way they know how to sleep.

This pattern is bad for both you and the baby. The baby’s dependent upon you to get to sleep when they wake up several times during the night. And you have to get up several times each night to get them back to sleep, which deprives you of sleep.

My sleep coach recommended this book to me a few months ago. While she now works with adults, she began her career coaching parents of infants who couldn’t get their babies to sleep.

I’m glad I asked her for this book recommendation. It’s solid. I plan to implement these strategies with my baby from the time she's a newborn.

[Sezen Gosin · Rating 1 out of 5]

I wish I had never read or applied this technique to my daughter . It is the worst thing you can do to a child especially in the first 7 years of their life when they need you do the most . I am afraid that this program damaged my daughter for life as she is now 6 and so scared of dark and being alone . Crying it out , taking their favorite toys , closing the door on them when they need you the most when they are so little when they need you the most ?! I don’t know how on earth I even followed all this horrible advise through . My younger daughter who I ever sleep trained sleeps like an anger every night when my daughter who has been tortured because of this evil program still has many issues . Do yourself a favor and educate yourself on the importance of parents being there for their kids when they need you the most to comfort them especially during the first 7 years of their life . Once you missed that boat that boat is gone forever , you have a child with deep issues in your hand for life .

[Catalina · Rating 5 out of 5]

A really good book that helps you understand the importance of sleep and gives you tactics to implement with your children from newborn to toddlers.
Highly recommend to any parent struggling to get their kids to sleep through the night.

The only thing that I didn’t like was the fact that it was a bit repetitive if you read it all. But it has good strategies to follow, will definitely implement when my baby is born.

[Korina · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is the technique I chose to use for my daughter. I love that it gives two options (stay in the room or leave and check in) and everything is done step by step. You know each night what you should be doing and how the baby should be reacting. Although Dana's strategies can be strict, there is some flexibility for you to adapt to your own child.

[Christine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn't follow this program exactly but learned many tools that did help my baby learn to self soothe. Baby figured it out around 5 months, and everyone was sleeping much better! Also, join this Facebook group and the one for Rebecca Michi Slumber Academy for great sleep tips and advice from other parents.

[Alexandra · Rating 5 out of 5]

If I could give this book 10 stars I would!
My daughter was waking up at least 2x every night since she was 5 months!
This book is so easy to use -and I refused to do the cry it out method-I felt so confident doing Dana’s method and now my daughter sleeps from 8pm-6am every night! And it took less than a week!

[Amelie · Rating 1 out of 5]

Would give it a 0.5 if I could. Some information is true, like newborns can get overstimulated, but the whole idea that babies need to be taught how to sleep and best from day one is completely off the mark. It ignores all available knowledge we have on infant brain development and attachment theory. It's recommended to rely on the latter rather than outdated recipe-like parenting advice.

[Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Sleep Sense Program is a wonderful tool for learning to teach healthy sleep skills to children. Ordinarily, I rate books for the quality of the content, but this book is a tool and has to be rated that way. The book is written for the sole purpose of transmitting content. The writing is concise, to the point, and riddled with a typos. It isn't meant to be read from cover-to-cover either (though I did, because I don't feel that I can mark a book off my READ list unless I've read it cover-to-cover).
However, this book was incredibly useful to me. In reading it, I learned how to get my daughter to fall asleep at 7:30 in the evening (as opposed to 2:00 and 3:00 am!) The book is filled with practical examples and case studies and "what ifs" and FAQs that I found very helpful. This is a necessary read for all new parents.

[Paula · Rating 4 out of 5]

Practical and easy to follow. While I didn't implement the author's sleep program exactly as she suggested, I took away many tips that were useful in helping my 4mo sleep better. A helpful resource for anyone who's getting ready to have a baby or wants to help a child have more success sleeping.

[molly · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 month old

Very straightforward direction to helping our son learn to sleep. We weren't having him take enough naps, now that he does he's sleeping through the night! It's amazing the amount of sleep little babies need but what a difference it makes when they get it.

[MICHIKO Fisher · Rating 1 out of 5]

Unfortunately the program suits certain children but not all. It doesn’t articulate what to do in certain circumstances, and how to readjust the program depending on the child’s needs. Lacks academic approach and specific details and more of a self promotional contents.

[Megi Popova · Rating 2 out of 5]

There is too much repetition throughout the book. The essence is that you have to leave your child to learn how to get to sleep on its own, remove any props and don't use as sleep methods rocking, nursing to sleep, hugging to sleep, etc. I think these are all common sense.

[Julie Mitchell · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pretty basic but good advice. There's repetition in chapters so you don't always need to read it too deeply, but the parts I did need, I reread several times.

[Katrina McBride · Rating 3 out of 5]

Easy to read...we'll see how easy to implement...

[Alexa (Fernandez) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Only on night 2

The author is right. Every night you implement these strategies, the struggling and crying decreases. Just be consistent so your child knows what to expect.

[Sandra · Rating 3 out of 5]

Book is alright but I liked Kim West's book much more.

[Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book.

[Doroti · Rating 2 out of 5]

Involves a lot of crying.
Too much to deal with.