The Mirror Within: A New Look at Sexuality

by Anne Dickson

Clears up misconceptions about human sexuality, discusses body image, masturbation, orgasm, and lesbianism, and considers the nature of love and friendship.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Feminism

192 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1985

About the author

I am a psychologist by profession and have for over three decades been working as a trainer and educator. To those who already know of my work through reading one of my books or attending a workshop or lecture, a warm welcome too.

My commitment and passion have always been to equality, honesty and nonaggression: through both the facilitation of classes, workshops and ongoing courses in an extraordinarily diverse range of contexts and cultures and also through my books, I have attempted to teach and encourage others who are similarly interested in upholding these same values.


The key to what I do - and what I have always done - is authentic communication as the basis of sincere relationship whether that is with our nearest and dearest, with colleagues, with friends or with those we hardly know. Taking responsibility for what we want (or don't want) and for how we express ourselves requires sensitivity to the requirements of love for oneself and others. How do we balance these needs? How do we learn to set limits and say 'no' in unclear relationships? Are we happy with the quality of our relationships? Which people do we really want around us? How can we handle conflict and tension in ways that respect different viewpoints and needs instead of solely aiming for a win/lose outcome? How do we break out of old habits of fear and conditioning and learn to find our real inner voice?

My personal and professional commitment though goes far beyond the limits of self-development for the sake of self-development. Equality, honesty and nonaggression stand in stark contrast to prevailing cultural norms of individualism, competition, dishonesty and aggression. Setting up this website is an attempt to reach out and establish contact with others who also find it hard to maintain these values in today's world: who are keen to promote equality and compassion and an alternative to those models of power we see all around us which continue to do untold harm at every level of existence.

Reviews

[Cherry Goh · Rating 4 out of 5]

A thought-provoking and important book on women and sexuality. The message is still very relevant for today and I particularly liked chapter on women’s sexual stereotypes (the ‘slut’, the ‘madonna’, the ‘virgin’ etc) as well as the chapter examining the way society treats women; both were helpful for my personal reflection.

Since this was written in the 80s some of the wording used is dated but it does not take away from the power of the message for women to reclaim their bodies. The book is full of suggested exercises and questions for deeper thinking, and I can see how helpful this would be if used in a support group/ group of female friends.

Overall I enjoyed this book on an important and under-discussed topic.

[Lisa de Jong · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent book that gives the reader and thorough understanding of how sexuality has evolved throughout history and where different cultural norms and stereotypes come from. The focus is on female sexuality. A good read to learn what your parents don't tell you and what you didn't hear in the school yard :)

[Alejandro Quesada · Rating 3 out of 5]

Una mirada profunda y auténtica sobre la sexualidad femenina desde una perspectiva única: la de las propias mujeres, para las mujeres.

Para empezar diré que este libro no me aportó muchas ideas nuevas, pero sí reforzó lo que ya sabía, añadiendo datos nuevos a los libros que he leído previamente sobre esta temática.

Ahora bien, lo que más me sumergió en la lectura fueron los capítulos que abordan la Imagen Corporal y los Sentimientos de las mujeres, ya que ofrecen una visión y un análisis bastante profundos y que ha sido nuevo para mí.

Como hombre, me identifiqué mucho con los capítulos centrados en los roles masculinos y la sexualidad de los hombres, proporcionando una perspectiva esclarecedora sobre la complejidad de estas dinámicas. Y un capítulo particularmente impactante fue 'Mujeres que aman a otras mujeres', desafiando y redefiniendo los roles tradicionales.

Sin embargo, y esto referente al libro en su conjunto, hubiera preferido una perspectiva menos cargada de negatividad en varios capítulos. A pesar de que el libro se escribió hace dos décadas, considero que ya en esa época había propuestas para desafiar los estereotipos impuestos por el patriarcado y es por eso que eché en falta una exposición más amplia de esas posibles soluciones.

Aun así, me encantó la inclusión de 'Sugerencias prácticas' al final de casi todos los capítulos. Considero que esta estructura proporciona herramientas de calidad para trabajar en los conceptos explorados durante toda la lectura. Sin duda me ha llevado a cuestionar muchas ideas preconcebidas y ha resultado ser un excelente libro para cerrar el año.