Badass Bonita: Break the Silence, Become a Revolution, Unearth Your Inner Guerrera

by Kim Guerra

Almost every Latina has heard the phrase calladita te ves más bonita—you look most beautiful when you are silent. It's a message rooted in machismo passed from generation to generation, and one that poet and Latine therapist, Kim Guerra, grew up on. In Badass Bonita, Guerra tells a story of coming into her own power, and guides readers through the process of finding their own. Rejecting what she was taught as a girl, she learned to use her voice and the more she listened to that inner niña, the more she unearthed her inner guerrera. Vowing never to be calladita again, she now teaches Latine women to find their voices, healing the stories and emotional wounds that have kept them silent. Tackling tough conversations around machismo, mental health, trauma, and intersectional identities, Badass Bonita is a guide that will help Understand underlying sources of wounds and trauma, Shift from self‑silencing and into revolutionary self‑love, Build confidence and bring positive change to relationships, family and community. Lyrical and accessible, written in Kim’s signature poetic, Spanglish style, Badass Bonita is perfect for readers of My Grandmother's Hands and Este dolor no es mío, — for mothers, daughters, therapists, and mujeres poderosas everywhere ready find their wings.

Genres: Nonfiction, Latinx, Self Help, Feminism, Social Justice, Audiobook, Psychology

272 pages, Hardcover

Published September 17, 2024

Reviews

[Tomes And Textiles]

In certain moments, I felt like I was in the room with my own therapist. This was a beautiful and healing read about becoming your very own Badass Bonita. Full review to come.

[Jessica Markulik · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thanks to Netgalley for this ARC. 3.5 stars rounded down. I loved the bilingual writing style though there were many grammar errors (in both languages) which I'm hoping will be fixed by publication. This book has a powerful message but it can sometimes feel a little corny. The affirmations at the end of each chapter were a little much for me.

[Socorro Borunda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read and listened to the audiobook. This book was beautifully written. It hit home with a lot of things Kim talked about- especially being a Latina woman. It is a very powerful book & it takes time to process every little thing she talks about. If I would’ve read this book a few years back- it probably would’ve triggered me & it would’ve been harder to process. But now that I’m in my healing journey, I was able to pause, reflect & accept my feelings. I loved that she has sections of reflections & questions that I was able write about in my journal. Currently reading for our book club & it’s a perfect book for discussions.

[SussyO · Rating 4 out of 5]

Empowering and encouraging to put me 1st - thanks!

[StylesPlenty · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is filled with beautiful empowering messages that will make you rethink things and appreciate things more.

Thank you to NetGalley and Grand Central Publishing for the ARC of this book in exchange for my honest review.

[marianna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I practically devoured this book—5 out of 5!

“Your voice is powerful and necessary. What you have to say is important, because who you are is important. Calladita no te ves más bonita. Fuck that. ¡Usa tu voz, mija!”

It resonated deeply with me due to my upbringing around machismo mindsets. I connected with Kim Guerra's references to being told how to be a “good woman,” “una buena esposa,” and “una buena hija.” I found it confusing and frustrating that as a child I was never asked if I wanted to learn how to be those things. It was expected of me, so I listened. Only until the third grade lol. Me alegro mucho de haber superado esa mentalidad.

Kim Guerra touches on the correlation between Latina's mental health struggles and “the pressure to self-silence or self-sacrifice to be respected and accepted” instead of standing up for themselves. In other words, Latinas are taught to serve men and be quiet from the start.

This book reinforced my belief that I should continue to speak my mind and stop shrinking myself to appease others (particularmente el ego masculino).

Siempre seré la niña contestona en mi familia. Llevaré ese título como una insignia de honor y me vale toda madre lo que diga la gente.
Como dice el dicho, “La vida, larga o corta, que sea buena es lo que importa.”

[Empanadani · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I started reading this, I was disappointed in the writing. It's not beautiful and it's corny. When I got to the last chapter, I still felt that way, but there's a warmth and positive energy within the words. It's a book expressing itself without shame. I ended up having to have a pen with me every time I opened the book because I needed to underline phrases and sentences that made me feel seen and understood. I wrote thoughts in the margins. I wrote questions and answers to her prompts. It was a conversation with another Latina that understands my dysfunctional Mexican family even though she's never met them.

She also includes reflection questions, exercises, and affirmations. It's an interactive book in that way.

There's a lot of hope in this book. It makes me want to be a believer.

[Melissa L. · Rating 4 out of 5]

I feel like for the right person, this book will be so enlightening. I just wasn’t in the headspace for all this encouragement to break through every LatinX trauma. I guess I don’t fully relate. However, moving forward I will make time to talk to my inner niña. 4 stars because I will never not support a female Latina writer.

[Christine Camarillo · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5…. 4 maybe…. many feelings about this book but my main struggle was that the style of writing that self help book use feels so unnatural to me (personal problem)

[Gema · Rating 5 out of 5]

There’s a healing power in every word Kim writes. This is one of those books you’ll always carry with you. It’s definitely not one to read in a single sitting; it calls for pauses and serious contemplation. I love how Kim unequivocally challenges the harmful elements of Latino culture while still uplifting its beautiful parts. It’s so dope that a queer Latina wrote this. I’m in awe.

There are so many memorable quotes, but my favorite is:
Enamórate de ti.
Enamórate de tus sueños.
Enamórate de tu libertad.

[Lilea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Can I give this 6 stars? Likely my favorite book of 2024. A must read for Latinas, chicanas, y mujeres poderosas!

[Yamilet · Rating 4 out of 5]

Badass Bonita is a book written for all those little girls who were told, “calladita te ves más bonita,” a phrase that has echoed through generations, silencing voices and stifling the vibrant spirits of young Latina women. This book challenges what Latina women have been taught their whole life and tackles themes commonly associated with the Latina experience, such as machismo, marianismo, racism, abuse, and homophobia. But more than just a reflection of struggles, this book serves as a powerful guide to breaking the cycle of intergenerational trauma, offering insights for healing and empowerment.

As someone who has navigated the turbulent waters of these experiences, I can confidently say that this book has become the closest thing to therapy for me. It resonates deeply, not just through its words, but through the understanding and validation it provides. The author articulates the unspoken pain that many Latinas carry, revealing how we often hesitate to discuss our traumas due to a lifetime of conditioning that teaches us to endure quietly. We are led to believe that sharing our struggles is a sign of weakness and that seeking therapy is reserved for those deemed “crazy.” This stigma perpetuates a cycle where pain remains unaddressed, and healing feels out of reach.

I have long searched for a book that not only acknowledges our struggles but also offers a roadmap for navigating the complexities of growing up as Latinas. Badass Bonita does just that, providing not only solace but also actionable steps to cope with trauma and dismantle the barriers that keep us from living our fullest lives. Through its pages, the author encourages her readers to embrace their stories, reclaim their voices, and step into their power, all while recognizing the strength that comes from vulnerability.

Badass Bonita champions the idea that our voices matter, our stories are valid, and that healing begins when we dare to speak our truth.

-------------
Favorite quotes:

- We didn’t choose the soil we were born into, but we can choose the garden we will plant.

- F*** being calladita!

- I am healing for my inner niña, my daughters, and their daughters.

———————
Some notes:

- The author uses spanglish throughout her book, often speaking in Spanish and then back to English. She provides some translations, but could become difficult to read/understand if you do not have much familiarity with Spanish. However, do not let that discourage you <3

- The book provides reflections after each chapter if you like to journal or would like to start journaling.

[Living My Best Book Life · Rating 5 out of 5]

Badass Bonita is the perfect read to celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month with. I am buying a copy for my sister, my primas, and my besties. Kim Guerra speaks from her soul and empowers women and Latinas to speak up and live authentically.

I grew up in a multigenerational household full of strong Latinas. My abuela spoke her mind and have everyone scared to get on her bad side...but not me because I was her favorite ;). In our culture, machismo is apparent and it can be hard to find a place to fit in and even when you dream big you can be told that you are a woman...that's only men's work. I did experience most of this from outside my family. I was always in the books and felt like I was shamed for it. But I had the best support system from my immediate family. My parents and grandparents always told me the best advice and I feel like that is exactly what Kim is trying to do with this book. Give advice based on her experiences so that no one ever feels like they are supposed to stay silent.

I feel so empowered after reading this. I was reminded that being proud of my culture doesn't mean I have to stay within the norms. It's important to challenge yourself and continue to grow. I loved her reflections and exercises to make you think so that you can understand yourself better. I think many people will learn the importance of self-love and being authentic to yourself is a winning combination.

[Denise Hatcher · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an easy-to-read book about growth, self-understanding, self-acceptance, and self-empowerment. The use of English and Spanish and her at times colorful vocabulary added a laid back tone to the book and its powerful messages. The twelve chapters explain and provide examples of how our live experiences and the people in them shape us into the individuals we become, but we can choose to learn to live our lives in the way that makes us happy, fulfilled, and true to ourselves. On page 159 she explains, “Society loves telling women who and how to be.��� Throughout the 247 pages, the author offers advice from her own experiences about how she learned to accept who she is and what she deserves in life, which at times meant having to unlearn messages she had heard for a long time. The final chapter, The Mariposa Effect, reiterates that our growth, development, and self understanding can undo past cycles of damage, and empower us, as well as those around us. On page 217 she explains, “The Mariposa Effect happens when one woman gives herself wings and inspires other women to do the same.” And, that is what this entire book does: it gives its readers permission to fly and become the happiest version of who they can be.

[Katelyn Palmer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Holy shit that’s good.
She touches on ideology like:
-reparenting
-coming to save your inner child/vowing to your inner child your coming to rescue her/it.
-innerchild work/ shadow work visualizations, meditations, and affirmations

All for you how live yourself TRULY. This girl has done some deep psychological work. This is really impressive psychological ideology. This is empowering self love type stuff. Nurturing yet strong and empowered and self respecting and unwavering self love and self devotion. Powerful.

And I’m incredibly impressed by the organization of the charts and the bullet points, it just makes the ideas and concepts easy to read and digest when they’re that organized. And all the information is relevant and poignant. Some books have this kind of organized information the concepts are vague and pointless; some books it just seems like they add the charts and bullets so they look like they know what they’re doing and to make the book LOOK more professional. This book actually is rich helpful concepts and the organizations and bullet points are actually very useful and clean and rich in content/concepts.
And I love the mix of Spanish and English; it’s perfectly intertwined.
Love this book. I’m so impressed and glad she wrote it.

[Clary Turcios · Rating 4 out of 5]

“I’m choosing to write a love story between me and my inner niña.”

This book was everything. Seeing thoughts, feelings, and experiences reflected on the page was both affirming and heartbreaking. It was affirming because it reminded me that no one is alone, yet disheartening because so many women, especially Latinas, carry these same wounds.

Badass Bonita is full of beautiful, powerful messages for every woman who was ever told, “Calladita te ves más bonita.” It’s for the ones learning to speak louder, love themselves harder, and heal the parts of themselves they were taught to hide.

Kim Guerra writes with raw honesty about machismo, marianismo, racism, homophobia, abuse, and generational trauma. Many of us have had to hide parts of ourselves, feel silenced, or endure abuse that was dismissed. Guerra doesn’t just name these struggles; she shows how they echo through family lines, how culture and expectations silence women, and offers tools like reflections, affirmations, and questions to begin breaking free.

Reading Badass Bonita felt like therapy in written form. It’s a reminder that healing isn’t linear, that voices matter, and that loving your inner niña is one of the bravest things you can do.

“Fuck being calladita.”

[Dulce Hernandez · Rating 5 out of 5]

is truly a powerful and healing read. Kim’s words make you feel seen, understood, and validated in a way that’s hard to describe. Through her storytelling and shared experiences, you begin to realize you’re not alone in what you’ve been through.

Love the quote in the end what she said: "Change is beautiful, change is badass and change starts with you..." you have all you need to give yourself wings ahora atrevate a volar."

She gently reminds you of your worth and gives you the strength to see yourself with more love and compassion. As I continued reading, I felt lighter, more powerful, and more comfortable in my own skin. It honestly felt like a step forward in my personal journey—especially emotionally.

This book is more than just a read; it’s an experience of self-love and healing. I’m so grateful to Kim for creating something so real and empowering.

[Elizabeth · Rating 3 out of 5]

Won this in a Goodreads giveaway!

I really enjoyed Kim Guerra's book. Although I'm not Latina myself, I appreciated how she encourages Latina women to boldly step into their power. She does this by so honestly explaining and illustrating her own journey into the FBC lifestyle, providing practical and wise steps other women can take to dismantle the beliefs and behaviors that are ingrained into them and that perpetuate a harmful, misogynistic culture and instead embrace themselves fully. The questions and practices (such as affirmations) she poses throughout the book are useful and thoughtful, the historical and scholarly info helpfully exposes readers to theory and grounds them in a basis for Guerra's claims, and the incorporation of Spanish in the primarily English text is spot on.

[Vinnie or Vin · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a fellow Latina, you can be rest assured that your time will not be wasted with this read and rather give you back some time. This book delves into the raw Mexican roots that make us up for better or worse and it's up to us to whether we just take it or leave it. She helps us look at the ugly side that is being Mexican and shows us that life can still be beautiful. A book like this gives you a big hug and doesn't let go but in a good way though! Kim also talks about her life growing up which is also very helpful when it comes to learning and unlearning the Latinx life. She also gathers a lot of ways to take back your life that was taken from us. Badass Bonita is an everlasting and ethereal read that will shake you for the better.

[Valerie Contreras · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was something that I really needed. I found it very inspiring and eye opening. This book talks about so many important topics that many Latinos, especially women/girls, face all the time. The layout is very cohesive as it has a specific topic, then the author tells us about her own experience, and then it has affirmations/reflections. I feel very heard from this book and it feels very healing for me.

It is a a beautiful and well thought out book that many Latinas can use as a resource to heal. I definitely recommend for everyone to read this book.

Thank you to Kim Guerra, the publisher, and NetGalley for this e-ARC.

[Trinidad Acosta-Christon · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely loved this book! I have never related so much to something. Kim does a beautiful job of describing what it's like to be a Mexican (although she uses the term "Latine" to encompass all Latinos and Latinas, in a gender neutral fashion) woman, but also one that is queer. The amount of trauma that we (especially as women) grow up with in our culture is astounding, and many just don't understand it. I highly recommend this book to all women who are not white, because I feel like other cultures can relate. It is in Spanglish, but Kim does a good job of repeating what she says in Spanish, in English, so that a non-Spanish reader will understand the vast majority of what's written.

[Xenia · Rating 5 out of 5]

At first I wasn't sure how this book would pertain to my life because I always thought I had it pretty easy. But then I realized maybe I needed to read for my mother, my grandmother and my daughter. This book made me think about how I feel! What I feel about myself worth, my past, my present & my future. It made me think about how I project myself, what I have picked up from past generations and what I show to future generations. It made me think about how my grandmother, my Tias and my mother were treated as the grew up. I didn't think I had intergenerational trauma, but I know that it was there in my past, and I want to make sure it does not escape into my future.

[S · Rating 1 out of 5]

It's a DNF for me. I was really enjoying this and it made so much sense to me as a Latin American immigrant woman, but once she started messing with the Spanish language to accommodate third pronouns, she lost me. DO. NOT. MESS. WITH. THE. SPANISH. LANGUAGE!! She could have written these bits in English, which is more fluid and gender friendly than Spanish, which is so much more rigid. I did not mind the "Spanglish" because that is how our communities speak in this country, but just because you speak a certain way does not mean that is how you should write.
It's too bad because the message of this book is probably very powerful but I guess I'll never know.

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75/5 stars

I think this is more of a me-thing and not generally about this book but I had to power through this.

It also addresses the relationship between a Latina and her mother, and I don’t have so many issues with my mom. She’s my girl.

It addresses machismo and homophobia, but never really delves into the relationship between a latina and her father/the men in her family other than through other women. It’s great for what it is and did allow me to do some self-reflection on how to change and become a better woman but also how to not pass on generational trauma, such as body image issues.

[enchantingprose · Rating 4 out of 5]

I devoured this book and that’s not an easy feat for a nonfiction book for me. This book is poetic with dense long chapters. (My only reason it’s not 5 stars). I do fear is very niche to only Latina Americans since it’s half memoir / testimony of the author’s experience. However Latina Americans need a voice and this one is a good one to hear.
She is a butterfly coming to remind the catapillars where they will end up. It has empowering affirmations. It does go off a bit on the lgbt side but in saying mainly be who you want to be.

[Soph · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Fuck being calladita."

I know this book wasn't written for me, as I'm not Latina. But the ways in which Latine and Greek cultures are similar is heartbreaking. As women, some experiences are global. This book is a love letter to everyone who was raised and brainwashed to be the good little wife, the person who is selfless to the point of self-destruction. It's a conversation with an older sister, a therapist, the mum we all needed to hear this from. This book is a hug and a gentle push to break free from society's inhumane demands.

[Tamar Vazquez · Rating 3 out of 5]

Loved the concept of this book and I loved all the topics that were talked about in this book because I feel like they are very important things that need to be talked about in the Latino community. There was a lot of things that were said that really made me reflect on my life and in my healing journey. I rate this book a 3.5 only because the first part of the book I couldn’t really relate to it although the topics are still very important in the Latino community I felt like they were not personal to me. Overall I liked this book and I think it’d be perfect for someone who is in their healing journey and needs a reminder that they are a badass Bonita💗

[Nina · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good energizing read

I loved learning more about Latin culture. I thought a lot was relatable on a personal level but also just as a human dealing with machismo, women's bodies, relationship y and boundaries, self love and so much more. I don't think any of the topics for me were revolutionary. I talk about these things wit friends a lot but I will say the reflexiones were the hard part. Stopping actually reflecting on yourself. Good start for certain people and just energizing for me with clear work that still needs to be done.

[Amarilys · Rating 5 out of 5]

Powerful message of breaking chains and self healing for all women but specifically Latinas. The cultural references are so relatable and the call for our communities to do better is loud. The lack of Latin/Spanish speaking mental health professionals is something I too have felt and is what inspired me to back to school and pursue a career in mental health. To see my same thoughts and feelings echoed on the page was both so disheartening and affirming.

[Jackie Paiz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very empowering and beautifully written in both English and Spanish. Listening to the audiobook was such a lovely experience! As a therapist it was wonderful hearing a lot of the concepts I discuss with clients written in such an accessible and informative manner. I will definitely be taking many of the affirmations listed in this book with me.