The Happy High Achiever: 8 Essentials to Overcome Anxiety, Manage Stress, and Energize Yourself for Success—Without Losing Your Edge

by Mary E. Anderson

A game-changing road map for ambitious people to transform chronic stress and anxiety into sustainable happiness and success.

Throughout her years as a licensed clinical psychologist, Mary E. Anderson, PhD—known affectionately as “Dr. A” by her clients—has noticed a Talented, productive, and often brilliant patients—from business executives to lawyers to grad students—constantly arrive on her couch, drop their flawless facades, and describe feelings of self-doubt, burnout, and worry.

The Happy High Achiever brings Dr. Anderson’s unparalleled expertise to the wider world. The book is a practical guide to her 8 Essentials, a set of powerful principles with actionable, science-based strategies to combat the unique pressures and pitfalls of high-performing individuals. These CBT-based tools help ambitious people like you live free of the perpetual anxiety and fear of failure that can hold you back, and instead enjoy both happiness and high achievement.

The Happy High Achiever will teach

Why striving for perfection actually limits you How to navigate uncertainty with less worry and more ease How to find relief in moments of overwhelm How to overcome the three most problematic ways of thinking that plague high achievers Why gratitude is rocket fuel for your success How to get clear about what you really want for your life How to effectively manage stress to boost your calm and confidence and enhance your performance
Most importantly, you’ll learn anxiety is not the price of admission for your success. You have the power to optimize your life and be your best. You can be a happy high achiever.

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Business, Audiobook, Leadership, Mental Health, Health

257 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 24, 2024

Reviews

[Maddie Faria · Rating 5 out of 5]

Recommend this to anyone whose perfectionism has started to harm more than help. Anderson does such a wonderful job of highlighting the ways high achievers brains can create obstacles to success, and provides incredibly poignant and translatable strategies to help overcome the anxiety of perfectionism. Will be rereading and rereading til the cows come home

[Alona · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’ll give this a 2.75/5 only because there were things that reframed the way I looked at my work day while listening to this, but generally super repetitive and not very unique in the takes. I appreciated the reminder though. Seeking a good Spotify audiobook reccomendation 🥲

[Debra · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you to Balance for my copy. My opinions are my own.

Driven, high-achieving people can be at risk for high levels of worry, self-doubt, and burnout. Perfectionism, not setting boundaries, and people-pleasing are easy challenges for high-achievers to have. Dr. Anderson presents these challenges and what she calls the “8 essentials” for overcoming them in an optimistic way, using lay terminology and explanations for ordinary people and spaces throughout for individual guided reflection and action. It provides the basic building blocks for how to continue being a high achiever but in a healthy way. Given that, I would recommend this book for someone who is just starting out in exploring solutions, though there is always something to learn from each other no matter how far along the journey you are. A big part of perfectionism is comparing ourselves to others and measuring success based on others’ approval. That’s unhealthy. Excellence should be the goal, not perfection, and there are both internal and external factors that affect that. In the end, taking care of one’s self it’s important, not selfish, so take the steps you need to be happy and healthy.

[Raghavi · Rating 5 out of 5]

concrete examples and a tangible framework propel this book into a new league in the “self-help” genre, setting it apart from other similar books

[♡︎.ᐟજ⁀➴ Erie · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Happy High Achiever 🌟📚

As an ambitious woman striving for success, I've often felt the relentless pressure to perform, accompanied by the lingering shadows of anxiety and self-doubt. Dr. Mary E. Anderson's "The Happy High Achiever" is a beacon of light, offering a transformative roadmap to manage stress, overcome anxiety, and cultivate sustainable happiness and success.

🌱 The 8 Essentials: A Science-Backed Path

At the heart of this practical guide lies the 8 Essentials, a set of powerful principles grounded in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Dr. Anderson, a licensed clinical psychologist, draws upon her extensive experience to provide actionable strategies tailored to high-achieving individuals. Each chapter is dedicated to one of these essentials, seamlessly blending scientific research with real-life anecdotes, making complex concepts accessible and engaging.

🌟 Challenging Perfectionism & Embracing Uncertainty

One of the most profound takeaways is understanding how the pursuit of perfection can limit our potential. By navigating uncertainty with less worry and more ease, we can unlock new levels of personal and professional growth. Dr. Anderson masterfully guides us through the process of reframing our thoughts and embracing the unknown.

🧘‍♀️ Overcoming Overwhelm & Problematic Thinking

The book provides invaluable tools for finding relief in moments of overwhelm and overcoming the three most problematic ways of thinking that plague high achievers. Dr. Anderson's expertise in health psychology shines through as she equips us with strategies to manage stress effectively, boosting our calm, confidence, and overall performance.

🥰 Gratitude & Clarity: Fuel for Success

Gratitude, as Dr. Anderson eloquently illustrates, is rocket fuel for our success. By cultivating a gratitude practice and gaining clarity about our true desires, we can create a life aligned with our values and aspirations. This shift in perspective allows us to enjoy both happiness and high achievement, dispelling the myth that anxiety is the price of admission for success.

Expert Endorsements & Personal Impact

The glowing endorsements from renowned psychologists and authors such as Scott Barry Kaufman, Seth Gillihan, Jill Stoddard, Chris Bailey, and Peter Salovey further attest to the book's credibility and transformative power. Personally, "The Happy High Achiever" has been a game-changer, challenging my preconceived notions about achievement and providing a sustainable path to happiness and success.

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐/5 – A must-read for ambitious achievers seeking to shed the shackles of anxiety, imposterism, and burnout. Dr. Anderson's down-to-earth, accessible, and practical guide is a life-changing resource for anyone committed to reaching their highest potential while enjoying the journey. 🌟

[Susanna Bloderer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dr. Mary Anderson is a psychologist that works with high performers from various fields. This book - so she says - is directed at people who love their "To-Do Lists".

As someone who has a list for everything, I felt like the blurb of the book spoke to me, and so did its contents. I love how gentle and non-judgemental the author was, using language that normalises our (=The High Achievers') struggles rather than condemning them.

I felt, strongly, that the intention of the book was to remove the shame attached to feeling like nothing you do is ever good enough, which is why there was also a (very necessary) chapter about practising self-compassion.

The reason I am not rating this book higher- although it's well-referenced, interesting enough and inoffensive - is that a lot of the advice is cookie-cutter for many self-help books: sleep enough, exercise, eat healthily, take breaks.

The parts that I found helpful was to have a place where you can go mentally when you feel overwhelmed in the moment - what other books are often lacking is that when you have a busy life, you might not always be able to rest when you feel stressed - so Dr. Anderson's advice is actually implementable. Also, she says it's important to give yourself small rewards and have something to look forward to - because even anticipation in itself does wonders for your mental health, something that's definitely true for me.

Also, she gave more realistic suggestions on how to combat perfectionism - to strive for excellence instead, because everyone makes mistakes. This wasn't something I liked to hear on an emotional level, but understood cognitively - not giving yourself grace is a recipe for burnout.

I had scrapped a project I had been wanting to do for ages because I felt like I didn't know enough about it and didn't know where to even start. That part really spoke to me, and shook me out of my perfectionism paralysis. I can happily report that since reading this chapter and taking it to heart, I've started my research and even took some notes and made a rough outline.

Overall, one has to be realistic with the expectation one has in a self-help book: it can only appeal to a broad audience and can never take into account individual circumstances. If you're aware of these limitations and find you're self-sabotaging yourself because of your high expectations in yourself - I can highly recommend you give "The Happy High Achiever" a try. I already had a real-life benefit from the book that I was able to apply.

[Avery Horton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic book, especially for people in high stress careers. I see a lot of reviews saying that “there’s nothing in here that’s not in other self-help books”, and while I can’t speak to that, I CAN say that everything in this book is well thought out and FIRMLY based in clinically proven practices. The strength of this book is in the digestible format, actionable steps, and the SPECIFICITY. If you don’t feel like this book is for you within the first couple of chapters, it’s probably not- but for me it felt like Dr. A was reading my mind. And I would prefer a book that does exactly what it claims for a specific audience, than a generalist self-help tome that’s somehow supposed to speak to everyone.

Everything in the book is firmly based on Dr. A’s experience as a licensed clinical psychologist, and based in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy [CBT] (a proven therapeutic technique based on years of practice and research). She ALWAYS cites her sources, and even when she is pulling quotes from blogs they connect back to her clinically-backed essentials. It’s almost better to think of this book as a “CBT Quick Start Workbook for Perfectionists” - if you’re not going to put in the work by journaling, returning to the exercises, and commuting these essentials to memory and putting them in practice, you’re not going to feel better. Dr. A’s gift is in making it convincing, easy to remember, start, and scaffold. She also has radical compassion for her audience and a unique understanding of how people who fit into the target audience think.

All in all one of the best books I’ve ever picked up, and it’s making me better and less anxious every day. 10/10 couldn’t recommend more.

[Mohammad AlSaeed · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is an inspiring exploration of the tension between ambition and fulfillment. Chapter 11 stood out for its relatable analogy of the "moving goal posts," capturing the struggle of never feeling satisfied despite achieving success. Chapter 12's discussion on legacy is equally powerful, urging readers to reflect on what truly matters. While the book offers profound insights, I felt certain sections could have included more actionable strategies. Overall, it’s a motivational read, deserving 4 out of 5 stars.

[Lizzy Chan · Rating 2 out of 5]

I picked up this book due to its title. However, upon flipping through a few pages and appendices, I find that it directly borrows ideas and references from other self-help books such as Mindset by Carol Dweck and Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg. The references sections are ridden with blogs and books. You are better off seeing a personal licensed professional that could tailor advice for you.

[Owen Scotting · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great read! As a young adult who’s anxiously awaiting what’s to come, this book did an excellent job at providing useful tips for avoiding my anxious burnout. Although some parts of the book are quite repetitive, the repetition allowed me to integrate the ideas into my psyche. Would definitely recommend!

[Vicki · Rating 4 out of 5]

I won this book in a giveaway and I’m happy I did. It seems to be geared towards people still in the workforce but I found many helpful tips for me as a retired high achiever. Post it notepad chore list ftw! And now I will be passing it on the friends and family who will find helpful tidbits on their own.

[Caroline Ruby · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book that got me out of my reading slump-but not necessarily because it was amazing, but because it was what I needed. Reframed the way I look at things with respect to anxious thoughts and negative self-talk, but it did get quite repetitive. Would still recommend to anyone struggling with perfectionism or anxiety.

[Isabel Garcia-Rovira · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed listening to this audiobook. It came at the right time for me. The content was great and full of practical tips, and it’s something I can see myself returning to whenever I’m feeling a bit lost or in need of a reset.

[B · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mellow read with good and simple advice. Good examples and good pointers.

[Rebecca Yang · Rating 2 out of 5]

No longer the target audience for this book. There’s nothing here that hasn’t been covered in countless other self-help books.

[Alessia · Rating 4 out of 5]

as a chronic over achiever this was much needed, would recommend!

[Otis · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not a bad quick read. Worth checking out if you haven't read a lot of self development books. Fairly repetitive though, so if you are familiar with the topic then maybe give this one a miss.

[Jil · Rating 4 out of 5]

Etwas repetitiv, aber letztlich schön und vor allem motivierend geschrieben.
Hält was der Titel verspricht :)

[Sam · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting book. Full of useful tips to become a happier person who wants to achieve more