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Still Alive
V expects a tug-of-war romance with the charming yet withholding LEX to cure her early-2000s ennui, but her family’s chaos threatens to derail her overdue adulthood. This fast-paced swirl of memory and action hurtles toward a surprisingly hopeful end. Sexy, with razor-sharp humor and heart-tugging romance, STILL ALIVE is a novel to fall into, in love with, and find yourself changed.
290 pages, Paperback
Published February 8, 2024
9 people are currently reading
198 people want to read
About the author
LJ Pemberton
1 book15 followersLJ Pemberton is the author of Still Alive, which was longlisted for the 2025 Dublin Literary Award.
Publishers Weekly called Still Alive a “fresh and vivid debut.” This heady exploration of love and disillusionment in the contemporary age follows the misadventures of V as she contends with love, family dysfunction, and the “crummy job market of the aughts” in “aching prose.” Jason Christian, for Full Stop, said: “I keep thinking of Still Alive as a queer Fight Club (1996) for the millennial generation…If Fight Club touted moralistic dogma and material deprivation as a path to liberation, Still Alive laughs in the face of such naïve confidence in easy solutions.”
Available at asterismbooks.com, barnesandnoble.com, bookshop.org, amazon.com, and wherever books are sold.
Her essays, poetry, and award-winning stories have been featured in The Baffler, Exacting Clam, Los Angeles Review, Northwest Review, and elsewhere. She currently reviews fiction for Publishers Weekly.
Find out more at ljpemberton.com.
Publishers Weekly called Still Alive a “fresh and vivid debut.” This heady exploration of love and disillusionment in the contemporary age follows the misadventures of V as she contends with love, family dysfunction, and the “crummy job market of the aughts” in “aching prose.” Jason Christian, for Full Stop, said: “I keep thinking of Still Alive as a queer Fight Club (1996) for the millennial generation…If Fight Club touted moralistic dogma and material deprivation as a path to liberation, Still Alive laughs in the face of such naïve confidence in easy solutions.”
Available at asterismbooks.com, barnesandnoble.com, bookshop.org, amazon.com, and wherever books are sold.
Her essays, poetry, and award-winning stories have been featured in The Baffler, Exacting Clam, Los Angeles Review, Northwest Review, and elsewhere. She currently reviews fiction for Publishers Weekly.
Find out more at ljpemberton.com.
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
October 15, 2025
It’s all in the prose. The articulation of the emotions and feelings of a confused, restless person, relating those from young childhood to young adulthood—not told linearly, because consciousness isn’t linear—is superb. Also admirably, the story is never confusing, even when it shifts in time, even when numerous friends are sometimes briefly mentioned at various times, and even with sentences sometimes being long and, I hesitate to say, rambling, because that has a negative connotation and these always have a point and are never boring. But yes, they ramble, in that way our minds do and in the way the narrator does, literally and figuratively, as she returns to the places and defining moments of her childhood that may or may not have everything to do with the person she is.
March 15, 2024
David Foster Wallace once said “Fiction’s about what it is to be a fucking human being. If you operate, which most of us do, from the premise that there are things about the contemporary U.S. that make it distinctively hard to be a real human being, then maybe half of fiction’s job is to dramatize what it is that makes it tough. The other half is to dramatize the fact that we still 'are' human beings, now. Or can be.”
In this dazzling debut, Pemberton offers both of Wallace’s halves – the forces that make it hard to live in the US right now, and the things we do despite them – in abundance. As we follow the narrator, V, across the country and through various jobs, she describes Tinder, temp work, breakups, hookups, dystopian politics, road trips, memories of a not-so-happy childhood, and moments of soul-nourishing friendship. The book crackles with life, lust, pain, and raw beauty.
When I read something, I like to fold down the corner of pages with passages I want to return to. And by the time I finished “Still Alive,” there were dozens of folded pages.
When V describes an early-teen-years relationship: “I knew then that I loved her without knowing what that meant, just that I liked being in the world with her, and I liked it best when we could be alone.”
Describing the way this country conditions us to think: “That’s the American way–blame yourself, your lack of self-control, your indulgence, not the landlord, your employer, the government.”
Describing a certain kind of family: “We were all inside the house, alone.”
Describing what it felt – and still feels – like online after the 2016 election: “I wanted to rage, stand proudly against the creeping authoritarianism that extended from Washington, but I took the coward’s route. I dove into the twitterverse and other internet metaplaces to commune and rant. We knew it was not enough, that screaming in a barrel is an impotent match against martial brutality, but I think we hoped that someone was listening. If men could be radicalized in chat rooms, couldn’t they also learn to love themselves and people not like them, somewhere on the web?”
This is an utterly unique book. I’ll read whatever Pemberton publishes next.
In this dazzling debut, Pemberton offers both of Wallace’s halves – the forces that make it hard to live in the US right now, and the things we do despite them – in abundance. As we follow the narrator, V, across the country and through various jobs, she describes Tinder, temp work, breakups, hookups, dystopian politics, road trips, memories of a not-so-happy childhood, and moments of soul-nourishing friendship. The book crackles with life, lust, pain, and raw beauty.
When I read something, I like to fold down the corner of pages with passages I want to return to. And by the time I finished “Still Alive,” there were dozens of folded pages.
When V describes an early-teen-years relationship: “I knew then that I loved her without knowing what that meant, just that I liked being in the world with her, and I liked it best when we could be alone.”
Describing the way this country conditions us to think: “That’s the American way–blame yourself, your lack of self-control, your indulgence, not the landlord, your employer, the government.”
Describing a certain kind of family: “We were all inside the house, alone.”
Describing what it felt – and still feels – like online after the 2016 election: “I wanted to rage, stand proudly against the creeping authoritarianism that extended from Washington, but I took the coward’s route. I dove into the twitterverse and other internet metaplaces to commune and rant. We knew it was not enough, that screaming in a barrel is an impotent match against martial brutality, but I think we hoped that someone was listening. If men could be radicalized in chat rooms, couldn’t they also learn to love themselves and people not like them, somewhere on the web?”
This is an utterly unique book. I’ll read whatever Pemberton publishes next.
November 14, 2025
Thank you to the author, who was generous in providing me with a signed paperback copy of her book. All views and opinions are my own.
-
Often, these days, I find myself reading something horror related, or something in the greater expanse of speculative fiction. However, I enjoy taking a break, and reading something beyond genre realms. What does that entail? Go to any book store, look online, or visit your local library and you will find a multitude of volumes that are touted as great examples of narrative prose literature. It can make the task of finding a book that resonates with you, daunting. I look for those books, those writers, who manage to breath life, deliver something new, to prose literature. This is exactly what I found in L.J. Pemberton's debut novel " Still Alive".
Humans are messy, the bulk of our lives are not big, dramatic events, fantastic achievements and sould crushing tragedies. Our leaves are like skeines of yarn. Each strand are the little anxieties, the inner monlogues and jokes we tell ourselves and then laugh about later. They're the embarrasing situations that come up in adolescance, that continue to arise right before bed, on the eve of your 40th birthday. Pemberton's novel exists purely in the moment. To call it stream of consciousness, I feel would be doing the work a disservice, because what is a life but just that "a stream of consciousness".
Folk Singer and poet Utah Philips often described time as an "immense long river", we float along on in the moment, but the past never truly leaves us. This struck me while somewhere deep within this novel. Soon after I realized that the way Pemberton talks about lived experience, about time, to me was evocative of Kurt Vonnegut. Pemberton, and Vonnegut come to this with their own style, their own personal voices. Yet, they both hit upon the same concept. In Slaughter House Five, Billy Pilgrim views the length and breadth of his life from the now, his place on Tralfamadore, the past the present, all exist together in the moment, which is Tralfamadore.
In her own unique way, Pemberton approaches this same idea, this same way to look at life, approach time. "We are in the house", as Pemberton states in her novel. "We are in the house" which is the moment. speculation about the future flows into examination of the past. Still Alive presents all this in a voice, and with a narrative cadence that is beautifully written, seamlessly shifting that moment of now from past to present, to future, and round again.
Prior to reading this book, I had been considering the nature of place, of home, specifically how it relates to those of us of my generation, who never had solid roots in a given place. The desire for a stable anchor, a geographic location we can point to, beyond that something that remains in our heart. Still alive speaks directly to that desire, that yearning, many of us intimately know.
Because for some of us, those who seem to be ever moving, traveling, home remains a moment, a memory, an idea held inside. It's flimsy transparent sheet with cryptic designs that only makes sense to ourselves, we hold it up before each place we live, hoping that one day, the two match. "we are in the house" , yet we remain in the present, and home remains illusive, roots non existent.
-
Often, these days, I find myself reading something horror related, or something in the greater expanse of speculative fiction. However, I enjoy taking a break, and reading something beyond genre realms. What does that entail? Go to any book store, look online, or visit your local library and you will find a multitude of volumes that are touted as great examples of narrative prose literature. It can make the task of finding a book that resonates with you, daunting. I look for those books, those writers, who manage to breath life, deliver something new, to prose literature. This is exactly what I found in L.J. Pemberton's debut novel " Still Alive".
Humans are messy, the bulk of our lives are not big, dramatic events, fantastic achievements and sould crushing tragedies. Our leaves are like skeines of yarn. Each strand are the little anxieties, the inner monlogues and jokes we tell ourselves and then laugh about later. They're the embarrasing situations that come up in adolescance, that continue to arise right before bed, on the eve of your 40th birthday. Pemberton's novel exists purely in the moment. To call it stream of consciousness, I feel would be doing the work a disservice, because what is a life but just that "a stream of consciousness".
Folk Singer and poet Utah Philips often described time as an "immense long river", we float along on in the moment, but the past never truly leaves us. This struck me while somewhere deep within this novel. Soon after I realized that the way Pemberton talks about lived experience, about time, to me was evocative of Kurt Vonnegut. Pemberton, and Vonnegut come to this with their own style, their own personal voices. Yet, they both hit upon the same concept. In Slaughter House Five, Billy Pilgrim views the length and breadth of his life from the now, his place on Tralfamadore, the past the present, all exist together in the moment, which is Tralfamadore.
In her own unique way, Pemberton approaches this same idea, this same way to look at life, approach time. "We are in the house", as Pemberton states in her novel. "We are in the house" which is the moment. speculation about the future flows into examination of the past. Still Alive presents all this in a voice, and with a narrative cadence that is beautifully written, seamlessly shifting that moment of now from past to present, to future, and round again.
Prior to reading this book, I had been considering the nature of place, of home, specifically how it relates to those of us of my generation, who never had solid roots in a given place. The desire for a stable anchor, a geographic location we can point to, beyond that something that remains in our heart. Still alive speaks directly to that desire, that yearning, many of us intimately know.
Because for some of us, those who seem to be ever moving, traveling, home remains a moment, a memory, an idea held inside. It's flimsy transparent sheet with cryptic designs that only makes sense to ourselves, we hold it up before each place we live, hoping that one day, the two match. "we are in the house" , yet we remain in the present, and home remains illusive, roots non existent.
March 26, 2024
Rep: bi mc, butch lesbian li, gay side character
April 9, 2024
Wow! Beautiful and intense novel! So rich with life, friendship, love, desire, and humor. And the PNW references! I loved the stream of consciousness narrative, especially since our hero, V, is such a witty observer of everything going on around her.
August 14, 2024
Was a semi quick read, I enjoyed the writing style
September 2, 2024
STILL ALIVE's prose is like both tumbling and watching someone tumble down a hill. Wide-eyed adrenaline swirling across sentences and paragraphs with uninterrupted momentum and just when you feel you might lose control entirely you find yourself sitting at the bottom in a sunset field of wildflowers. And sometimes LJ Pemberton lets you rest and enjoy the good fortune of the view and sometimes she walks up and punches you in the stomach. This is a book about a certain kind of life, not as a series of discrete episodes building to a conclusion, but a continuum through which our founding traits evolve and expand and regress and congeal. Past, present, and future constantly weaving in and out of each other, spinning the wide-eyed awe of childhood into the insidious anxiety of adulthood. Knowing the same finger that held a Barbie's hand also knows exactly where and how hard to press against a lover but also understanding this clarity is not enough to survive in a system that doesn't care about your fingers unless they are pushing the correct buttons at the correct time. Balancing wonder and need, love and sustainability, money and desire. It's all here rendered in beautifully precise elevations of mundane, absurd, tragic, and ecstatic moments of existence. The silent study of the early years, the shallow pretentions of early adulthood, and the wiser distillation of those extreme opinions tempered with age that begin to form an ethos and striving to find a path to match. Maybe it won't ring a bell with every reader, but I certainly recognized myself in these pages. It is a full body read and you feel the pain and love that went into its creation. It's possible I haven't read enough of the right kind of books, but I've never read anything quite like this.
April 27, 2024
Visceral. Painful. Beautiful. Pemberton has a way with words. I look forward to seeing what comes next.
Some of my favorites lines:
"I began to wonder if every heartache wasn't just practice for the eternal separation between the living and the dead."
"I have always been good at lying because the lies I tell are goals I haven't committed to."
"Her memories were now nonsense without context, precious solely because she had made them so, and I had no place for her things because I did not know her reasons. I would never understand her context."
"Time lost to hurt, all edge without a handle."
Some of my favorites lines:
"I began to wonder if every heartache wasn't just practice for the eternal separation between the living and the dead."
"I have always been good at lying because the lies I tell are goals I haven't committed to."
"Her memories were now nonsense without context, precious solely because she had made them so, and I had no place for her things because I did not know her reasons. I would never understand her context."
"Time lost to hurt, all edge without a handle."
July 10, 2024
i wish i could put into words how good the words in this book are.
December 8, 2024
At first I wasn't sure if I'd finish this one but I'm glad I did. It reads like a journal or like someone's thoughts. A relatable story of growing up queer and with a "troubled" family in the 2000s on
April 9, 2024
You know when the remaining pages are fewer and fewer and you slow down reading because you don't want the book to end? This beautifully written book was good company in a way that only a story full of what's true and heartfelt can be. I just wish I could read it again for the very first time.
February 1, 2025
I don't know what to say. *So* well-written the whole way through. Every sentence. The characters, the imagery, the settings. Moving with V through time, through her relationships feels so natural. The parts of her life presented parallel to her childhood memories works so well and again, all of it is so vivid you could touch it. The littlest details, every speck fits so well into place. Frankly blown away and so happy I read it.
Read
October 23, 2024totally unrateable to me; simultaneously 1,2,3,4, and 5 stars. great atmosphere of course. recommended to me by my polycule of course
February 6, 2025
A great story about a life lived. I'm so glad to have stumbled across this beautiful work of fiction that embraces the (millennial America) human experience, through poignant, attention keeping writing that feels honest and relatable and often punches you in the gut. I'm not NOT V, and I really enjoyed seeing life through her eyes and experiences. This may be one of my favorite books ever. Kudos to LJ Pemberton!
July 17, 2024
Now this here is some fine writing. Wow.
July 12, 2024
This is such a diverse book:
*It is exquisitely written. There are so many paragraphs, sentences and even words that evoke such feeling and depth that they must be chewed, swallowed and digested to begin to appreciate them. I wanted to savor so many of them but that kept me from plowing through.
*This is a terrible book. I am yes, a gay woman and I hope that we as a culture have gotten past the point where many people believe that all gay women [and men] are like our protagonist here. I was so bored with the repetition of her relationship with one woman at different times in her life that I found myself skipping paragraphs that I am sure held afore mentioned gems. There are other relationships to the story and oddly enough they are repetitive too. As if our "star" followed script each time she was with a certain person.
I was so, so disappointed in this book. I was hoping for much more.
*It is exquisitely written. There are so many paragraphs, sentences and even words that evoke such feeling and depth that they must be chewed, swallowed and digested to begin to appreciate them. I wanted to savor so many of them but that kept me from plowing through.
*This is a terrible book. I am yes, a gay woman and I hope that we as a culture have gotten past the point where many people believe that all gay women [and men] are like our protagonist here. I was so bored with the repetition of her relationship with one woman at different times in her life that I found myself skipping paragraphs that I am sure held afore mentioned gems. There are other relationships to the story and oddly enough they are repetitive too. As if our "star" followed script each time she was with a certain person.
I was so, so disappointed in this book. I was hoping for much more.
August 20, 2024
This book truly has it all, it is funny, sweet, a little heartbreaking, and very relatable. Everything about it is clever and interesting and you can feel the intentionality in each call back and flash of memory as you learn more about V and Lex and their on again of again love. Throughout reading this book I found myself wavering in uncertainty about whether or not I wanted them to work out just as much as the characters themselves were and became fully immersed in their lives and their love. Despite all of the literal and figurative moving that happens throughout the novel no one is ever left out or forgotten about which was seriously wonderful to me as I am always wondering what happened to the fun side characters in every book. I wasn’t sure if this book would be for me when I started it but I can easily say this will be in my top five of the year now that I’ve finished it.
July 31, 2024
Tender and nostalgic, but it's always difficult to write an objective review for a book that found you right when you needed it. I'm very grateful this popped into my life when it did, and that it created the space to give me room to breathe every day.
dnf
February 12, 2024DNF @ 40%
Well written, but I'm just not feeling the story.
Well written, but I'm just not feeling the story.
March 31, 2024
The writing is good but I had zero engagement with the wearisome narrator.
April 16, 2024
If a natural disaster occurred, this book is the first thing I would grab.
July 28, 2025
I wanted to like this so badly but the style of prose was just not for me. And it’s hard to root for such a passive main character!
August 17, 2025
LJ Pemberton gives us a decapitated head in the third paragraph of Still Alive, and never lets up from there. We follow V as she tries to make her way through the world, always coming back to that first scene: "We were all inside the house," she says, so many times, still trying to understand her childhood, her parents, and her brother as she tries to find the meaning of her own life.
I loved this book for so many reasons, but mainly because of the propulsive writing itself. Pemberton writes with urgency, as if she were writing flash fiction rather than a novel, needing to make the best possible use of the available space, so that every single sentence is intense. I kept stopping to highlight passages, like these:
"the darkness and the velvet paintings and the smoke made it feel like rules were for other people"
"I hope for disaster as we leave, something bigger than us that could dwarf what drama we have created for ourselves in the heartache. I want to focus on a different pain."
But I also loved the character of V, finding that I could identify with her struggles even though my life is nothing like hers. I wanted her to succeed. I wanted her to be happy.
Outstanding novel. Highly recommended.
I loved this book for so many reasons, but mainly because of the propulsive writing itself. Pemberton writes with urgency, as if she were writing flash fiction rather than a novel, needing to make the best possible use of the available space, so that every single sentence is intense. I kept stopping to highlight passages, like these:
"the darkness and the velvet paintings and the smoke made it feel like rules were for other people"
"I hope for disaster as we leave, something bigger than us that could dwarf what drama we have created for ourselves in the heartache. I want to focus on a different pain."
But I also loved the character of V, finding that I could identify with her struggles even though my life is nothing like hers. I wanted her to succeed. I wanted her to be happy.
Outstanding novel. Highly recommended.
June 7, 2025
Loved this book. Adrift in the reified world.
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews