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When Church Is Hard
As a bishop of a young single adult ward, Tyler Johnson once hosted a Q&A night in which ward members could submit any question anonymously. Many members’ questions echoed the thoughts of one person, who asked, “Growing up, the restored gospel meant so much to me. It was intuitively important. As time passes, however, the gospel simply doesn’t seem important. The irony is, I want it to matter. I want it to regain that intuitive importance in my life. Can you please help me understand why it matters?”
In When Church Is Hard, you’ll find empathy and understanding about challenges you may face as you navigate life in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the context of current-day issues. You’ll also discover how the decision to stay can be not only reasonable but a powerful commitment to furthering the common good—including the good of marginalized members. Find a new perspective on how committing your life to discipleship in the restored Church can be a daring, beautiful, even countercultural act that confirms the best of what’s within us and offers theological richness found nowhere else.
If you are struggling with questions and seeking to square your intuitive sense of the good found in the Church with questions about its history, doctrine, culture, or practices, this book is for you.
In When Church Is Hard, you’ll find empathy and understanding about challenges you may face as you navigate life in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the context of current-day issues. You’ll also discover how the decision to stay can be not only reasonable but a powerful commitment to furthering the common good—including the good of marginalized members. Find a new perspective on how committing your life to discipleship in the restored Church can be a daring, beautiful, even countercultural act that confirms the best of what’s within us and offers theological richness found nowhere else.
If you are struggling with questions and seeking to square your intuitive sense of the good found in the Church with questions about its history, doctrine, culture, or practices, this book is for you.
241 pages, Kindle Edition
Published June 1, 2024
66 people are currently reading
267 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 75 reviews
October 14, 2024
I really enjoyed this book. I thought it would focus more on what to do if someone offends you at church, and while it briefly touches on that idea, it’s definitely not the focus. The author disclaimers at the beginning that he can’t speak for everyone’s experiences and he’s not trying to pretend to understand everyone and their life circumstances. I think he did a great job of addressing concerns mindfully and compassionately.
Pre 2020 me probably would have been confused by this book and I wouldn’t have enjoyed it. However, from 2020 to 2022, my world, political, and faith perspectives shifted, and I saw things so differently than I had my whole life up to that point. This book voices many of my thoughts and feelings over the past few years.
This book is not for everyone. I’m sure some people would find this discussion to be a nonissue and others would find the thoughts in this book to be trite compared to the complexities of a faith journey and the human experience. Still, I thought the author did a great job of being open and candid. I’m pleasantly surprised that Deseret Book published this book. It was really well done. I listened to the audiobook and I’m considering getting a hard copy to look through and reference again.
Pre 2020 me probably would have been confused by this book and I wouldn’t have enjoyed it. However, from 2020 to 2022, my world, political, and faith perspectives shifted, and I saw things so differently than I had my whole life up to that point. This book voices many of my thoughts and feelings over the past few years.
This book is not for everyone. I’m sure some people would find this discussion to be a nonissue and others would find the thoughts in this book to be trite compared to the complexities of a faith journey and the human experience. Still, I thought the author did a great job of being open and candid. I’m pleasantly surprised that Deseret Book published this book. It was really well done. I listened to the audiobook and I’m considering getting a hard copy to look through and reference again.
June 7, 2024
Tyler Johnson has written a book that delivers a monumental message of hope, love and acceptance. It is an impactful addition to such books as: “Planted” by Patrick Mason; “Faith after Doubt” by Brian D. McLaren and “The Crucible of Doubt” by Terryl Givens. It may be one of the more important books written addressing the sometimes-uncomfortable issues of those who feel left-out, minimalized, and doubting their beliefs of their faith and the Church it represents.
There is no finger pointing or trying to find a villain responsible for those who find it difficult to live their faith. But a reasonable exploration of the spiritual journey we all have. When Johnson referenced a quote from one of David Brooks’ books, he had me connected with his appreciation and requirement for empathy and the responsibilities we have with our relationships.
This book is uplifting and powerful in its tender teachings of what is included in the exercising of faith and love towards others and ourselves. Who among us has not had a moment of wondering who we are, where we have come from and what is our destiny. For those who have served missions and now find their lives vaguely empty and confusing, this book may offer some reflective comfort.
At the end of the book, there is a Medicine Man from the Reservation, who is now ill and seeing a doctor but is silent meeting with the physician. It is a poignant moment. The doctor ask the Indian if he can dance. The Indian understands the dance he uses to heal. He tells the doctor he can teach the physician how to dance, but the physician must find the music. The music is the lasting faith that is within each of us to find and remember.
There is no finger pointing or trying to find a villain responsible for those who find it difficult to live their faith. But a reasonable exploration of the spiritual journey we all have. When Johnson referenced a quote from one of David Brooks’ books, he had me connected with his appreciation and requirement for empathy and the responsibilities we have with our relationships.
This book is uplifting and powerful in its tender teachings of what is included in the exercising of faith and love towards others and ourselves. Who among us has not had a moment of wondering who we are, where we have come from and what is our destiny. For those who have served missions and now find their lives vaguely empty and confusing, this book may offer some reflective comfort.
At the end of the book, there is a Medicine Man from the Reservation, who is now ill and seeing a doctor but is silent meeting with the physician. It is a poignant moment. The doctor ask the Indian if he can dance. The Indian understands the dance he uses to heal. He tells the doctor he can teach the physician how to dance, but the physician must find the music. The music is the lasting faith that is within each of us to find and remember.
August 5, 2024
It’s no secret that the LDS church is losing people in droves (especially young people). So it’s not surprising that Deseret would release a book like this in an attempt to convince people to stay. As a Christian Pastor, I was grieved by the amount of manipulation, red herrings, and double think in this book. So much so that I had to write a complete blog response.
https://cross4acrown.blogspot.com/202...
https://cross4acrown.blogspot.com/202...
August 26, 2024
I didn’t get everything I had wished from this book but it wasn’t bad. Especially his testimony at the end was really powerful.
Read
August 6, 2025More accurate title: Letters to a Young Woke Mormon Considering Leaving the Church
Tyler Johnson addresses essentially 3 specific issues Gen Z and Millenials commonly have with being active members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints:
- Testimony: Why does my testimony seem to shrink even when I’m doing the right thing? How do I know I’m not just experiencing confirmation bias?
- Social good: How can I feel OK about belonging to a church that hurts LBGTQ+ folks and people of color?
- Dealing with imperfect church leaders: How do I reconcile a “true” church with racist leaders? How do I deal with historical questions about polygamy?
Tyler also addresses what he thinks are the major theological strongpoints of the church. He argues (I think persuasively) that these are overlooked and uniquely beneficial to modern society.
I love Tyler, and I’m so grateful his thoughts (especially the graphs I’ve seen him draw so many times) are publicly accessible. Honestly, I’m impressed by Deseret Book for publishing something so sympathetic to people who leave the church.
I didn’t love the individualist language spread throughout the book (“you know what’s best for you and despite having listened to hundreds of people, I do not know what it’s like to be you”) after reading one of the beginning chapters about how individualism is ruining us as a society. I don’t know what the right balance is, but that dissonance bothered me.
I loved the section on the theological strengths of the church. So beautiful (but not new to me). But I didn’t feel my issues with why church is hard were really explored, and it felt lonely reading over and over again about how tough life in the church is for *other* people (specifically not straight white people).
The structure of the book didn’t feel super polished to me. Tyler worked very hard to give credit and context to each passage he quoted and that often detracted from the flow. Also I am not well-read enough to understand most of the poetry. 😬
Tyler Johnson addresses essentially 3 specific issues Gen Z and Millenials commonly have with being active members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints:
- Testimony: Why does my testimony seem to shrink even when I’m doing the right thing? How do I know I’m not just experiencing confirmation bias?
- Social good: How can I feel OK about belonging to a church that hurts LBGTQ+ folks and people of color?
- Dealing with imperfect church leaders: How do I reconcile a “true” church with racist leaders? How do I deal with historical questions about polygamy?
Tyler also addresses what he thinks are the major theological strongpoints of the church. He argues (I think persuasively) that these are overlooked and uniquely beneficial to modern society.
I love Tyler, and I’m so grateful his thoughts (especially the graphs I’ve seen him draw so many times) are publicly accessible. Honestly, I’m impressed by Deseret Book for publishing something so sympathetic to people who leave the church.
I didn’t love the individualist language spread throughout the book (“you know what’s best for you and despite having listened to hundreds of people, I do not know what it’s like to be you”) after reading one of the beginning chapters about how individualism is ruining us as a society. I don’t know what the right balance is, but that dissonance bothered me.
I loved the section on the theological strengths of the church. So beautiful (but not new to me). But I didn’t feel my issues with why church is hard were really explored, and it felt lonely reading over and over again about how tough life in the church is for *other* people (specifically not straight white people).
The structure of the book didn’t feel super polished to me. Tyler worked very hard to give credit and context to each passage he quoted and that often detracted from the flow. Also I am not well-read enough to understand most of the poetry. 😬
July 23, 2024
These are the church books I want to read. This bold narrative helps me realize that my thoughts and core beliefs have a place in this church. This book gives me hope that the ‘us vs them’ teachings are ending. We are all God’s children and there is a place for each of us. What a fantastically bold book.
Thank you Deseret Books for shifting your publishing to be more inclusive (more BIPOC books please!) And thank you to the author, Tyler Johnson, for writing a book that encourages us all to be more loving, inclusive, and to hold onto hope despite the pain.
Thank you Deseret Books for shifting your publishing to be more inclusive (more BIPOC books please!) And thank you to the author, Tyler Johnson, for writing a book that encourages us all to be more loving, inclusive, and to hold onto hope despite the pain.
September 2, 2024
I think the author had some good philosophy about why church, but honestly there were some things that seemed off to me. It seemed only helpful for people who are not in line with gospel teachings, but I was hoping to read about how things can be hard even when you are in the gospel. I can't explain well, but this book didn't leave me with good feelings, but I do think he had some great points, but not a great book
July 17, 2025
this book took me MONTHS to finish, but it's because i read this as I went along my own spiritual journey. tyler validated some of my deepest fears of the doubts I have about church, while also embracing and welcoming the growth that comes with your own personal reflection. this isn't a book about how to stay in the church, this is a book about the process of reconnecting with yourself and with God, if that's what feels right to you. this book was the closest I got to scriptures for many many months, and I am truly grateful for the peace I found turning these pages.
August 12, 2024
Wow- I liked this book a lot. I actually think I'd like to incorporate this book into my gospel study and read sections of it at a time so I can think about it more (I listened to it). This book has just the type of message that I want to hear- it's about how to keep faith but acknowledge and try to improve the challenging parts about membership in the Church.
November 1, 2024
Some parts of this book were FANTASTIC, others “meh”— a SOLID 4 stars, may deserve 4.5
I listened to this book, but I would encourage others to read it because it is rather dense.
I found this book on Deseret Bookshelf and my interest was piqued. As an actively-participating member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints with quite a few friends and family members that have detached themselves from the church, I thought this could be a helpful read. I was not mistaken! It expresses candidly some of the very real feelings had among church members in the 21st century, and takes a big-picture view of faith that promotes increased love and understanding. I especially loved the first half of chapter 9 that brought the big ideas of the book all together.
Fav ideas of the last hour or so of listening:
- inward discipleship vs outward discipleship
- building Zion/gathering Israel = more of the focus of our covenants
Although it is much larger than a conference talk, I felt like a lot of the ideas in the book relate well to Elder Dale G Rendlund’s October 2024 General Conference talk “‘This Is My Gospel’—‘This Is My Church’.”
I listened to this book, but I would encourage others to read it because it is rather dense.
I found this book on Deseret Bookshelf and my interest was piqued. As an actively-participating member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints with quite a few friends and family members that have detached themselves from the church, I thought this could be a helpful read. I was not mistaken! It expresses candidly some of the very real feelings had among church members in the 21st century, and takes a big-picture view of faith that promotes increased love and understanding. I especially loved the first half of chapter 9 that brought the big ideas of the book all together.
Fav ideas of the last hour or so of listening:
- inward discipleship vs outward discipleship
- building Zion/gathering Israel = more of the focus of our covenants
Although it is much larger than a conference talk, I felt like a lot of the ideas in the book relate well to Elder Dale G Rendlund’s October 2024 General Conference talk “‘This Is My Gospel’—‘This Is My Church’.”
November 7, 2024
Warning this is a Church book and would be very interesting/hard if not a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I read this to understand my son and some friends of mine. It was so incredibly helpful. The things that seem so simple in the gospel are not to others. These younger generations have information thrown at them from all sides and this book helps understand how their minds are processing. This book can help so many people see what others see and how to help. I wish everyone could read those solid in testimony and those who struggle.
February 3, 2025
There were some good points in here. It was full of empathy and love.
To me, it felt more geared toward educating someone who wants to better understand what their friends are going through who have questions/doubts rather than directly helping those who are themselves doubting.
I think it’s a decent resource for building empathy and understanding and could definitely be helpful for certain people!
To me, it felt more geared toward educating someone who wants to better understand what their friends are going through who have questions/doubts rather than directly helping those who are themselves doubting.
I think it’s a decent resource for building empathy and understanding and could definitely be helpful for certain people!
August 29, 2024
I didn't have anything I disagreed with. My problem is, surprisingly, I no longer know what it is like to not know. I've thought a lot about this lately. So, all his advice seems grounded and good, but I can't really tell the merit of the advice. I particularly liked the last analogy he used.
October 23, 2024
Some good ideas, but for some reason this book just didn't resonate with me. It was OK, but wasn't quite what I was expecting. At first I thought maybe it was the narrator of the audiobook who was a little flippant but then realized that the narrator was the author.
October 9, 2024
I wanted to understand more and know how to listen to the concerns of those around me. The first half was a little slow with not much new information, but the second half was pretty great.
July 18, 2024
Part 1: When Faith Falters
1/Our Brave New World: Those raised in depression see life full of scarcity. Our culture shapes us. We are becoming cyborgs. Shift in how people relate to each other (digital age/internet/cell phones). Digital age causes phone to be extension of body. Past: find info from encyclopedia and library. Now all history of church is readily available. People don’t trust (80% trust to 20% trust over last 50 years) the government (or other institutions) anymore. We are a nation that celebrates individual independence. Church is easier for a white male than to others. News used to be delivered by white men and presented as the way it is. Underrepresented are now able to share story through social media. Life views are are formed through a 1000 fractured mirrors reflecting back at us: we learn about ourselves and society from others. These mirrors have been shattered by social media (our own personal BB gun). Twitter is better at tearing down verses building up. It is difficult for young people moving away from home to have BB guns putting out all their mirrors.
2/Who needs church anyway: Living in the city, the author feels he doesn’t need a car. Some feel church is unnecessary. Problem with church: outdated concept to younger people. U.S. is a less communicative people. American politics influences churches (focus on family). Many churches associate with right wing politics. Young people don’t want to associate with churches who support certain political views. Institutional religion is losing its moral compass. Scripture can be welded as a weapon. Scriptures are a ballast (provides stability) for our life. In scriptures, you don’t read about people living in bliss. Declaration of Independence has a gap of what is written and what is being done. That gap is what gives us the need for scripture (where we are and where we need to be). Church worship allows us to be in the trenches with people who are not like us (others). The ‘protected’ make public policy and ‘unprotected’ live with consequences of policy. Protected and unprotected would live, love, and worship together.
3/What does it mean to Believe? Esperanza has spiritual experience while looking at stars and camping and she feels infinitely important. Esperanza reads Book of Mormon and joins church. We evaluate information (balance false verses true on scale). These spiritual feelings don’t hold up well next to scientific method. We should not limit how God speaks to us. Gumball theology: reading scriptures is money, burning bosom is gumball. Moroni 10:4 sets expectation for immediate answer in a specific way. Charting spiritual certainty over time (Esperanza’s shoots straight up vertical and remains there). Precept on precept (graph goes up and down slowly climbing). Knowledge: Accept truth with overwhelming evidence. Believe: Accept truth without compelling evidence, requires greater courage. Alma 32 describes slow growth of a seed. 2 Nephi 4:17 wretched man that I am. Harold B Lee: Testimony is fragile and as hard to hold as a moonbeam. Haight’s book: Righteous Mind. Subconscious (Elephants) and Rational minds (Elephant riders) can steer elephant. Elephant is already leaning toward or away. Doubt’s Role is belief’s prerequisite and companion. BYU devotional: Stand forever. Ignorant doubt: limits of current knowledge and spurs us to new spiritual horizons. Questioning doubt: suspicion that claim is not true. Dizzying doubt: state of believer’s heart when truth disarms him. Visceral doubt: elephant has turned away from still believing rider, impulse strains the reins. Believing doubt: realizing certainty is likely never to arrive – spiritual gift. All of them suggest incompleteness. Destructive Doubt: Pleasure in destroying belief. Is truth the main concern of doubt? Uchtdorf: We can block the growth and knowledge our heavenly Father intends for us. How often has the Holy Spirit tried to tell us something we needed to know but couldn’t get past the massive iron gate of what we thought we already knew. D&C 46:13-14 not knowing and choosing to believe.
4/Why and how we Believe: Experiment upon the word: believing better than nonbelieving? Currently, proliferation in militant atheism. Believing without evidence makes it difficult but brave. Reasons to believe: Missionary Hancock’s (threatening to come home due to unbelief) mom: pray with your feet, not your knees. Gibbons: Believe verses unbelief – neither are entirely rational. Church can fashion us into better people. Theology (rescues us from meaningless of society): identity (child of God), adversity (suffering is wound into fabric of universe - 2 Nephi 2:1), empathy (respond as Savior did/our hearts are turning cold), eternity (judged on what we most desire over time). Heaven is a chance to learn to love more deeply and become the beings God wants us to be. Social media causing people not to care about community. Wards are islands of social sanity (meaningful refuge). Hyper individualism – people live further and further apart from others. Power of covenants: link us to the rock of Jesus Christ.
Part 2: When God Stays Silent
5/Ethics of Faith: Esperanza reads scriptures and attends church. She develops cracks in testimony due to church history. Reyna Aburto: Black clouds may also form in our lives, which can blind us to God’s light and even cause us to question if that light exists for us anymore. Derrick: gospel was beautiful music and then it began to fade and eventually could hear nothing at all. Integrity: If I am not feeling the spirit, can I keep living the gospel and attending the temple? Belief motivates behavior. Less belief = less living of gospel principles (fidelity to gospel standards). We would be wise not to wane in our confidence. Jeffrey R. Holland: If it was right when you prayed about it, it is right now. Face your doubts. See the beauty unfold before you. Live as disciples live to bring us into proximity of Jesus. Impulse makes decision before conscious thought occurs. Heart transplant: patient receives a new heart – walk and not be weary and run and not faint. Faith keeps our discipleship aloft when our confidence falters. Rarely accomplish anything great without Loyalty bringing us through the periods where we want to give up. Every believer has gone through times when it is difficult to believe. Joseph vexed by God’s absence: D&C 121. Mother Teresa: struggled with doubt, terrible darkness in me as if everything is dead. CS Lewis: God abandoned him when his wife died. Jesus: despair of divine withdrawal (why has my God forsaken me?). Response to God’s absence defines who we become. Faith has difficulty springing back to where it was before the challenge (spiritual foundation shaken). We can never return to who we were (our faith will be different). Some see leaving church as the only option after challenge (requires humility to stay, faith is mellowed – we have more empathy).
6/When Belief Fades: Mary at the tomb (John 20). Mary had preeminence as a disciple. She is the first to see the risen Lord; only one to see him alone. When she sees Him, she has great difficulty believing it is Him. She cannot accept the reality of his resurrection. How can she not believe? She is one of the strongest believers; her baffling faithfulness even after He died. Idea of resurrection was a new thing. Believing is complex. Belief waxes and wanes and faith sustains us. Young woman: Testimony had become a pile of ashes (zero hour). Mary had an ember of sweet belief (feel her way toward the light)
Part 3: When your Heart Breaks:
7/A Church Both Living and True: Margret Young (on church membership): given name and blessing (& other blessings throughout life) using priesthood authority. Problem is what the church is and what we want it to be. Paradox of Restoration: open cannon; other churches are closed cannon. God will yet reveal many great and important things. Other churches know what they believe. Whatever we say we believe is not all we believe (many great and important things are still yet to come). Change is part of our church and ongoing revelation. Faith in prophets: President Kimball is our present day, Job. Joseph Smith preached a gospel of inclusion (Blacks); and that was changed and then reinstated. Church would be perfect if it was run by perfect beings. Nephi (2Ne 33:3-4) has written that my words will help them, I recognize that my words are weak, and I am weak. Moroni (Ether 12:23-25) if only I could write powerfully. Imperfection of prophets draw us back to repentance and Jesus Christ.
8/Healing the Body of Christ: Mainstream are heartsick for those who do not fit in. Young members feel church does not offer a warm place for all of God’s children. Church should offer Respite/healing/comfort to all members. Alma’s band in the wilderness (baptismal covenants) are bound together in empathy and compassion (bind us to each other and God). Black man joins church and is called epithet. Another YW feels need for more gender equality. Jesus encourages empathy. Jared prepares stones to shine forth in darkness (Jared embarrassed by his offering). We know our church falls short with regards to inclusion. Alisa is a safe haven for LGBTQ in the church (ability to bind wounds/oil in hollow places). Pain keeps us alive (prevents further injury). When the body of Christ is hurting, most of us are not called as a brain; however, as a finger I have obligation to relay pain messages to brain. Kimball: Revelation will never come unless it is desired. We must be the change we wish to see in the church. BYU is becoming less diverse, and those students have worse outcomes. Denying genuine pain for others is like denying the very suffering Christ felt for them. Jesus calls us but doesn’t force us. Zion will always beckon.
9/Believing and becoming: Journey of Christian faith is not for the faint of heart. Faith is about becoming. Hope, meekness and charity give faith life. Pray unto the Father with all energy of heart for charity. Prophets and scriptures are meant draw our eyes to God. Knowing God changes who we are. Faith keeps our diligence aloft when we doubt. Teflon Frying pan traded for stainless steel pan: scrubbed burned residue with sponge and then tried steel wool. Einstein: light is waves and particles (both true – paradox/dual nature). Confirmation bias: has everything I’ve learned at church been a lie? Church is like light (dual nature). Church is body of Christ (people); gospel is a transformative power (grace). Intellectual queries should not eclipse the real work of discipleship (action, loving God and others). Emma Lou Thayne: progressive woman who had become someone who loved others. Disciple ship that blesses the world. Inward facing discipleship (read, eat, wear) prepares us but is insufficient (self-centered/self-righteous). Inward discipleship mellows, teaches, calms, and prepares us to build Zion. Walking the covenant path (steps are transformative spiritual experiences). Baptism (D&C 20:37 – prepare by being humble/broken heart/serve Him; Mosiah 18 – mourn & comfort, witness of God & covenant community) and Endowment (sacrifice/obedience/gospel/chastity/consecration). Sacrifice and consecration (then: deed property to church & now: all that the Lord has blessed us). All that we have is given to us as a stewardship (building people is same as building the church). Garments remind me of that the covenant to consecrate is ever binding. Considering all I gave you spiritually and materially, what did you do to show your love for me to bless the world? Esperanza walks to church and she sees a man holding his hands out and her heart breaks open and she buys him breakfast (tasted charity).
Afterword: Hearing the Music Again: Lux Aeterna – Edward Elgar (wrote when he was ready to give up composing). Spent hours preparing for performance of this song in Santa Clara mission. Doctor asks medicine man to teach him to dance. He does, but emphasizes that the doctor has to ‘hear the music.’ Alma: can you hear the song of redeeming love?
1/Our Brave New World: Those raised in depression see life full of scarcity. Our culture shapes us. We are becoming cyborgs. Shift in how people relate to each other (digital age/internet/cell phones). Digital age causes phone to be extension of body. Past: find info from encyclopedia and library. Now all history of church is readily available. People don’t trust (80% trust to 20% trust over last 50 years) the government (or other institutions) anymore. We are a nation that celebrates individual independence. Church is easier for a white male than to others. News used to be delivered by white men and presented as the way it is. Underrepresented are now able to share story through social media. Life views are are formed through a 1000 fractured mirrors reflecting back at us: we learn about ourselves and society from others. These mirrors have been shattered by social media (our own personal BB gun). Twitter is better at tearing down verses building up. It is difficult for young people moving away from home to have BB guns putting out all their mirrors.
2/Who needs church anyway: Living in the city, the author feels he doesn’t need a car. Some feel church is unnecessary. Problem with church: outdated concept to younger people. U.S. is a less communicative people. American politics influences churches (focus on family). Many churches associate with right wing politics. Young people don’t want to associate with churches who support certain political views. Institutional religion is losing its moral compass. Scripture can be welded as a weapon. Scriptures are a ballast (provides stability) for our life. In scriptures, you don’t read about people living in bliss. Declaration of Independence has a gap of what is written and what is being done. That gap is what gives us the need for scripture (where we are and where we need to be). Church worship allows us to be in the trenches with people who are not like us (others). The ‘protected’ make public policy and ‘unprotected’ live with consequences of policy. Protected and unprotected would live, love, and worship together.
3/What does it mean to Believe? Esperanza has spiritual experience while looking at stars and camping and she feels infinitely important. Esperanza reads Book of Mormon and joins church. We evaluate information (balance false verses true on scale). These spiritual feelings don’t hold up well next to scientific method. We should not limit how God speaks to us. Gumball theology: reading scriptures is money, burning bosom is gumball. Moroni 10:4 sets expectation for immediate answer in a specific way. Charting spiritual certainty over time (Esperanza’s shoots straight up vertical and remains there). Precept on precept (graph goes up and down slowly climbing). Knowledge: Accept truth with overwhelming evidence. Believe: Accept truth without compelling evidence, requires greater courage. Alma 32 describes slow growth of a seed. 2 Nephi 4:17 wretched man that I am. Harold B Lee: Testimony is fragile and as hard to hold as a moonbeam. Haight’s book: Righteous Mind. Subconscious (Elephants) and Rational minds (Elephant riders) can steer elephant. Elephant is already leaning toward or away. Doubt’s Role is belief’s prerequisite and companion. BYU devotional: Stand forever. Ignorant doubt: limits of current knowledge and spurs us to new spiritual horizons. Questioning doubt: suspicion that claim is not true. Dizzying doubt: state of believer’s heart when truth disarms him. Visceral doubt: elephant has turned away from still believing rider, impulse strains the reins. Believing doubt: realizing certainty is likely never to arrive – spiritual gift. All of them suggest incompleteness. Destructive Doubt: Pleasure in destroying belief. Is truth the main concern of doubt? Uchtdorf: We can block the growth and knowledge our heavenly Father intends for us. How often has the Holy Spirit tried to tell us something we needed to know but couldn’t get past the massive iron gate of what we thought we already knew. D&C 46:13-14 not knowing and choosing to believe.
4/Why and how we Believe: Experiment upon the word: believing better than nonbelieving? Currently, proliferation in militant atheism. Believing without evidence makes it difficult but brave. Reasons to believe: Missionary Hancock’s (threatening to come home due to unbelief) mom: pray with your feet, not your knees. Gibbons: Believe verses unbelief – neither are entirely rational. Church can fashion us into better people. Theology (rescues us from meaningless of society): identity (child of God), adversity (suffering is wound into fabric of universe - 2 Nephi 2:1), empathy (respond as Savior did/our hearts are turning cold), eternity (judged on what we most desire over time). Heaven is a chance to learn to love more deeply and become the beings God wants us to be. Social media causing people not to care about community. Wards are islands of social sanity (meaningful refuge). Hyper individualism – people live further and further apart from others. Power of covenants: link us to the rock of Jesus Christ.
Part 2: When God Stays Silent
5/Ethics of Faith: Esperanza reads scriptures and attends church. She develops cracks in testimony due to church history. Reyna Aburto: Black clouds may also form in our lives, which can blind us to God’s light and even cause us to question if that light exists for us anymore. Derrick: gospel was beautiful music and then it began to fade and eventually could hear nothing at all. Integrity: If I am not feeling the spirit, can I keep living the gospel and attending the temple? Belief motivates behavior. Less belief = less living of gospel principles (fidelity to gospel standards). We would be wise not to wane in our confidence. Jeffrey R. Holland: If it was right when you prayed about it, it is right now. Face your doubts. See the beauty unfold before you. Live as disciples live to bring us into proximity of Jesus. Impulse makes decision before conscious thought occurs. Heart transplant: patient receives a new heart – walk and not be weary and run and not faint. Faith keeps our discipleship aloft when our confidence falters. Rarely accomplish anything great without Loyalty bringing us through the periods where we want to give up. Every believer has gone through times when it is difficult to believe. Joseph vexed by God’s absence: D&C 121. Mother Teresa: struggled with doubt, terrible darkness in me as if everything is dead. CS Lewis: God abandoned him when his wife died. Jesus: despair of divine withdrawal (why has my God forsaken me?). Response to God’s absence defines who we become. Faith has difficulty springing back to where it was before the challenge (spiritual foundation shaken). We can never return to who we were (our faith will be different). Some see leaving church as the only option after challenge (requires humility to stay, faith is mellowed – we have more empathy).
6/When Belief Fades: Mary at the tomb (John 20). Mary had preeminence as a disciple. She is the first to see the risen Lord; only one to see him alone. When she sees Him, she has great difficulty believing it is Him. She cannot accept the reality of his resurrection. How can she not believe? She is one of the strongest believers; her baffling faithfulness even after He died. Idea of resurrection was a new thing. Believing is complex. Belief waxes and wanes and faith sustains us. Young woman: Testimony had become a pile of ashes (zero hour). Mary had an ember of sweet belief (feel her way toward the light)
Part 3: When your Heart Breaks:
7/A Church Both Living and True: Margret Young (on church membership): given name and blessing (& other blessings throughout life) using priesthood authority. Problem is what the church is and what we want it to be. Paradox of Restoration: open cannon; other churches are closed cannon. God will yet reveal many great and important things. Other churches know what they believe. Whatever we say we believe is not all we believe (many great and important things are still yet to come). Change is part of our church and ongoing revelation. Faith in prophets: President Kimball is our present day, Job. Joseph Smith preached a gospel of inclusion (Blacks); and that was changed and then reinstated. Church would be perfect if it was run by perfect beings. Nephi (2Ne 33:3-4) has written that my words will help them, I recognize that my words are weak, and I am weak. Moroni (Ether 12:23-25) if only I could write powerfully. Imperfection of prophets draw us back to repentance and Jesus Christ.
8/Healing the Body of Christ: Mainstream are heartsick for those who do not fit in. Young members feel church does not offer a warm place for all of God’s children. Church should offer Respite/healing/comfort to all members. Alma’s band in the wilderness (baptismal covenants) are bound together in empathy and compassion (bind us to each other and God). Black man joins church and is called epithet. Another YW feels need for more gender equality. Jesus encourages empathy. Jared prepares stones to shine forth in darkness (Jared embarrassed by his offering). We know our church falls short with regards to inclusion. Alisa is a safe haven for LGBTQ in the church (ability to bind wounds/oil in hollow places). Pain keeps us alive (prevents further injury). When the body of Christ is hurting, most of us are not called as a brain; however, as a finger I have obligation to relay pain messages to brain. Kimball: Revelation will never come unless it is desired. We must be the change we wish to see in the church. BYU is becoming less diverse, and those students have worse outcomes. Denying genuine pain for others is like denying the very suffering Christ felt for them. Jesus calls us but doesn’t force us. Zion will always beckon.
9/Believing and becoming: Journey of Christian faith is not for the faint of heart. Faith is about becoming. Hope, meekness and charity give faith life. Pray unto the Father with all energy of heart for charity. Prophets and scriptures are meant draw our eyes to God. Knowing God changes who we are. Faith keeps our diligence aloft when we doubt. Teflon Frying pan traded for stainless steel pan: scrubbed burned residue with sponge and then tried steel wool. Einstein: light is waves and particles (both true – paradox/dual nature). Confirmation bias: has everything I’ve learned at church been a lie? Church is like light (dual nature). Church is body of Christ (people); gospel is a transformative power (grace). Intellectual queries should not eclipse the real work of discipleship (action, loving God and others). Emma Lou Thayne: progressive woman who had become someone who loved others. Disciple ship that blesses the world. Inward facing discipleship (read, eat, wear) prepares us but is insufficient (self-centered/self-righteous). Inward discipleship mellows, teaches, calms, and prepares us to build Zion. Walking the covenant path (steps are transformative spiritual experiences). Baptism (D&C 20:37 – prepare by being humble/broken heart/serve Him; Mosiah 18 – mourn & comfort, witness of God & covenant community) and Endowment (sacrifice/obedience/gospel/chastity/consecration). Sacrifice and consecration (then: deed property to church & now: all that the Lord has blessed us). All that we have is given to us as a stewardship (building people is same as building the church). Garments remind me of that the covenant to consecrate is ever binding. Considering all I gave you spiritually and materially, what did you do to show your love for me to bless the world? Esperanza walks to church and she sees a man holding his hands out and her heart breaks open and she buys him breakfast (tasted charity).
Afterword: Hearing the Music Again: Lux Aeterna – Edward Elgar (wrote when he was ready to give up composing). Spent hours preparing for performance of this song in Santa Clara mission. Doctor asks medicine man to teach him to dance. He does, but emphasizes that the doctor has to ‘hear the music.’ Alma: can you hear the song of redeeming love?
October 22, 2024
I listened to this one and loved it. The first few chapters were especially enlightening for me. The way he explained the way people may be thinking today seemed really accurate to my experiences. I love his concern for the thoughts and feelings of others as well as his clear desire to bridge understanding between different beliefs. He encourages more love, compassion and listening as we strive for more unity in our broken world.
January 23, 2025
What a beautiful message of hope. Thank you Tyler Johnson, I hope many people will read this book and find the peace and encouragement they need.
October 3, 2024
Wow this book Changed my life this book helped me understand my feelings. This taught me so very deeply emotionally I cried a few times because I felt forgotten. This book made me decide that I will go back to church.
February 12, 2025
I feel like church really is hard for so many reasons and a book written to address those reasons briefly and then to strengthen members and help them know how much God loves them would have been an amazing tool for church members.
In my opinion, this book didn’t do that
I read this book in the hope that it would help me better minister to others around me and I thought it might be a resource I could share with those who are having a hard time attending church. But it is not a book written to strengthen those members who actually struggle with being at church.
This book lays out the struggle between doubt and faith, support for the lgtb movement and briefly women wanting the priesthood.
There are so many other reasons why church can be hard. The author gave a quick list in a small paragraph mentioning what some of those might be but focused mainly on two. I think the author cares a lot about other people but is more of an echo chamber for them and somewhat elevates those who struggle in those two ways instead of teaching and testifying of truth and strengthening others in their faith in Christ.
There is a large section of the book given to addressing doubt and faith. The author throws away Elder Corbridge’s counsel and testimony to “Doubt not” so quickly and introduces an academic circus about how doubt can mean different things and that it is not a bad thing after all. In fact, it is brave and something to be admired.
There are three instances in the scriptures where doubt is directly addressed by the Lord that I can think of:
1) D&C 6:36 “Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not” this is a very clear directive. Does the Lord expect perfection from us, no. But this is what the Lord wants us to strive for.
2) John 20:27-29, “Then saith he to Thomas, Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side: and be not faithless, but believing.
28 And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God.
29 Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.” Jesus made a direct point to show Thomas his weakness in doubting and told him that those who had not seen him would be blessed for their belief.
3) Mark 9:17-24 (I’ve only included 22-24) “but if thou canst do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us. 23 Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth. 24 And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.” This is a beautiful example of a father who was asking the Lord to heal his son. When the Lord told Him it would be possible if he believed, this loving father asked the Savior to help him believe and the Savior did.
God knows of our weakness and wants to strengthen us, pretending that doubt is something to be praised instead of improved, doesn’t help us.
A lot of the book is focused on members who struggle with gender confusion/same sex attraction. The author comes across as rebuking members who do not support the LGTB movement and he is just waiting for the church to come around instead of teaching those who are struggling about how much God loves them and helping them see who they are:
A Child of God: The idea that everyone is a spirit child of God Child of the covenant: The idea that people are part of a covenant with God Disciple of Jesus Christ: The idea that people are followers of Jesus Christ
President Nelson has said that these three identities are enduring and should not be replaced by other identifiers. He also taught that people can find purpose, direction, and meaning in life by understanding their identity as a child of God and that understanding these identities can help people make better choices and overcome challenges. This should be the framework of church.
At the end of the book, the author said that the purpose of this life is just to do good wherever you are, but that is not the purpose of this life. Our purpose is to Come unto Christ and to be perfected in Him (Moroni 10:32) and to join God in His work “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man”. (Moses 1:39) It is to do things to help us change from the natural man to become more godly. Not just to “do good” in the world.
If I was to write a book about what to do when church is hard, I would acknowledge a larger variety of ways church can be hard for members and why. I would talk about how God understands our sorrows, frustrations and how hard it is. And it is hard. Then I would discuss our purpose on earth that focusing on coming unto Christ and being perfected in Him and joining Heavenly Father in His work will bring us peace and understanding in this life and prepare us for the next. I would help others to grow their relationship with their loving Heavenly Father. This is what helps us overcome hardships in this life. I would help them understand that God’s ways are not always our ways and teach how to submit our will to the Lord’s. Then I would encourage members to go to church looking for ways to lift and serve others. When we look for a community to conform around us or make us feel like we belong, we generally leave feeling dissatisfied. Luke 9:24 “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.”
It is an incredible miracle…When we look outward and focus on others, we are filled with God’s love and church becomes a joyful place and our burdens become lighter.
God loves us and I am grateful for everything that God has taught me and helped me overcome in my life.
In my opinion, this book didn’t do that
I read this book in the hope that it would help me better minister to others around me and I thought it might be a resource I could share with those who are having a hard time attending church. But it is not a book written to strengthen those members who actually struggle with being at church.
This book lays out the struggle between doubt and faith, support for the lgtb movement and briefly women wanting the priesthood.
There are so many other reasons why church can be hard. The author gave a quick list in a small paragraph mentioning what some of those might be but focused mainly on two. I think the author cares a lot about other people but is more of an echo chamber for them and somewhat elevates those who struggle in those two ways instead of teaching and testifying of truth and strengthening others in their faith in Christ.
There is a large section of the book given to addressing doubt and faith. The author throws away Elder Corbridge’s counsel and testimony to “Doubt not” so quickly and introduces an academic circus about how doubt can mean different things and that it is not a bad thing after all. In fact, it is brave and something to be admired.
There are three instances in the scriptures where doubt is directly addressed by the Lord that I can think of:
1) D&C 6:36 “Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not” this is a very clear directive. Does the Lord expect perfection from us, no. But this is what the Lord wants us to strive for.
2) John 20:27-29, “Then saith he to Thomas, Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side: and be not faithless, but believing.
28 And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God.
29 Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.” Jesus made a direct point to show Thomas his weakness in doubting and told him that those who had not seen him would be blessed for their belief.
3) Mark 9:17-24 (I’ve only included 22-24) “but if thou canst do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us. 23 Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth. 24 And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.” This is a beautiful example of a father who was asking the Lord to heal his son. When the Lord told Him it would be possible if he believed, this loving father asked the Savior to help him believe and the Savior did.
God knows of our weakness and wants to strengthen us, pretending that doubt is something to be praised instead of improved, doesn’t help us.
A lot of the book is focused on members who struggle with gender confusion/same sex attraction. The author comes across as rebuking members who do not support the LGTB movement and he is just waiting for the church to come around instead of teaching those who are struggling about how much God loves them and helping them see who they are:
A Child of God: The idea that everyone is a spirit child of God Child of the covenant: The idea that people are part of a covenant with God Disciple of Jesus Christ: The idea that people are followers of Jesus Christ
President Nelson has said that these three identities are enduring and should not be replaced by other identifiers. He also taught that people can find purpose, direction, and meaning in life by understanding their identity as a child of God and that understanding these identities can help people make better choices and overcome challenges. This should be the framework of church.
At the end of the book, the author said that the purpose of this life is just to do good wherever you are, but that is not the purpose of this life. Our purpose is to Come unto Christ and to be perfected in Him (Moroni 10:32) and to join God in His work “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man”. (Moses 1:39) It is to do things to help us change from the natural man to become more godly. Not just to “do good” in the world.
If I was to write a book about what to do when church is hard, I would acknowledge a larger variety of ways church can be hard for members and why. I would talk about how God understands our sorrows, frustrations and how hard it is. And it is hard. Then I would discuss our purpose on earth that focusing on coming unto Christ and being perfected in Him and joining Heavenly Father in His work will bring us peace and understanding in this life and prepare us for the next. I would help others to grow their relationship with their loving Heavenly Father. This is what helps us overcome hardships in this life. I would help them understand that God’s ways are not always our ways and teach how to submit our will to the Lord’s. Then I would encourage members to go to church looking for ways to lift and serve others. When we look for a community to conform around us or make us feel like we belong, we generally leave feeling dissatisfied. Luke 9:24 “For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.”
It is an incredible miracle…When we look outward and focus on others, we are filled with God’s love and church becomes a joyful place and our burdens become lighter.
God loves us and I am grateful for everything that God has taught me and helped me overcome in my life.
December 19, 2024
Here's a book review about "When Church is Hard" by Tyler Johnson, focusing on the points you requested:
Book Review: When Church is Hard by Tyler Johnson
Tyler Johnson's "When Church is Hard" delves deeply into the complexities of modern church life, offering a nuanced and often challenging exploration of the struggles and contradictions faced by individuals and communities within religious institutions. This is not a light read; Johnson presents a rigorous analysis, drawing upon sociological insights, theological reflections, and personal anecdotes to paint a picture of contemporary church life that is both insightful and unsettling.
The book tackles a range of thorny issues, including:
The tension between individual autonomy and communal belonging: Johnson masterfully examines how the emphasis on personal choice and individual expression can clash with the expectations of conformity and obedience often found within religious communities.
The struggle to reconcile faith with social justice: He grapples with the uncomfortable reality that many churches, despite their professed values, fail to adequately address issues of poverty, racism, and inequality.
The impact of power dynamics and hierarchical structures: Johnson critically analyzes how power imbalances within church organizations can lead to abuse, silencing, and a stifling of genuine spiritual growth.
The challenges of navigating diverse theological perspectives: He explores the difficulties of fostering meaningful dialogue and finding common ground amidst a landscape of increasingly fragmented and polarized religious beliefs.
Strengths:
Scholarly Rigor: Johnson's writing is deeply researched and meticulously documented, drawing upon a wide range of sources from academic literature to personal testimonies.
Intellectual Honesty: The author does not shy away from confronting uncomfortable truths and challenging long-held assumptions about church life.
Relevance to Contemporary Society: The book resonates powerfully with the challenges faced by individuals and communities in today's complex and rapidly changing social and cultural landscape.
Weaknesses:
Demanding Readership: The book's dense prose and complex arguments may not be accessible to casual readers.
Potentially Off-Putting for Some: The critical and sometimes unflinching analysis of church life may be unsettling or even offensive to some readers.
Overall:
"When Church is Hard" is a significant contribution to the ongoing conversation about the role of religion in contemporary society. It is a challenging but ultimately rewarding read for those seeking a deeper understanding of the complexities and contradictions of church life. This is a book for serious readers who are willing to engage with difficult questions and grapple with the realities of faith in the 21st century.
I hope this review provides a helpful overview of "When Church is Hard."
Book Review: When Church is Hard by Tyler Johnson
Tyler Johnson's "When Church is Hard" delves deeply into the complexities of modern church life, offering a nuanced and often challenging exploration of the struggles and contradictions faced by individuals and communities within religious institutions. This is not a light read; Johnson presents a rigorous analysis, drawing upon sociological insights, theological reflections, and personal anecdotes to paint a picture of contemporary church life that is both insightful and unsettling.
The book tackles a range of thorny issues, including:
The tension between individual autonomy and communal belonging: Johnson masterfully examines how the emphasis on personal choice and individual expression can clash with the expectations of conformity and obedience often found within religious communities.
The struggle to reconcile faith with social justice: He grapples with the uncomfortable reality that many churches, despite their professed values, fail to adequately address issues of poverty, racism, and inequality.
The impact of power dynamics and hierarchical structures: Johnson critically analyzes how power imbalances within church organizations can lead to abuse, silencing, and a stifling of genuine spiritual growth.
The challenges of navigating diverse theological perspectives: He explores the difficulties of fostering meaningful dialogue and finding common ground amidst a landscape of increasingly fragmented and polarized religious beliefs.
Strengths:
Scholarly Rigor: Johnson's writing is deeply researched and meticulously documented, drawing upon a wide range of sources from academic literature to personal testimonies.
Intellectual Honesty: The author does not shy away from confronting uncomfortable truths and challenging long-held assumptions about church life.
Relevance to Contemporary Society: The book resonates powerfully with the challenges faced by individuals and communities in today's complex and rapidly changing social and cultural landscape.
Weaknesses:
Demanding Readership: The book's dense prose and complex arguments may not be accessible to casual readers.
Potentially Off-Putting for Some: The critical and sometimes unflinching analysis of church life may be unsettling or even offensive to some readers.
Overall:
"When Church is Hard" is a significant contribution to the ongoing conversation about the role of religion in contemporary society. It is a challenging but ultimately rewarding read for those seeking a deeper understanding of the complexities and contradictions of church life. This is a book for serious readers who are willing to engage with difficult questions and grapple with the realities of faith in the 21st century.
I hope this review provides a helpful overview of "When Church is Hard."
January 30, 2025
This book is an argument for why one might stay in the LDS Church when confronted with legitimate reasons for leaving. Just that framing represents a seismic shift in Mormon discourse. Johnson intentionally does not say that one should or must stay in the Church, and he admits that there are legitimate reasons for leaving—that there can be a moral case for movement in either direction.
For the framing alone, I think this book is worth reading for those with skin in the game. It’s short and easy to read. The more of us who realize that there are sincere spiritual, moral, and intellectual reasons for staying or leaving, the less fraught our conversations around those entrances and exits will become.
Johnson strikes me as sincere—more so than many apologists. While I left the book understanding why he is a practicing Mormon, I don’t think he succeeds in explaining why the LDS Church (to the exclusion of all other churches or religions) is the place to be. He almost concedes as much: “You might respond, Yes, but Paul’s teachings are the common heritage of all Christians—can’t this same scenario play just as well in any Christian church, or in any church at all? To that I respond, Perhaps.”
He then goes on to argue that the LDS Church is unique in the community that it fosters, primarily through its lay ministry and its geographic formation of congregations. Those really aren’t unique features of Mormonism or (I think) anything close to the most compelling argument for Mormon community. Other people, like Terryl Givens, have made more forceful arguments on that point. But I’m past judging people over their reasons for staying or leaving.
For the framing alone, I think this book is worth reading for those with skin in the game. It’s short and easy to read. The more of us who realize that there are sincere spiritual, moral, and intellectual reasons for staying or leaving, the less fraught our conversations around those entrances and exits will become.
Johnson strikes me as sincere—more so than many apologists. While I left the book understanding why he is a practicing Mormon, I don’t think he succeeds in explaining why the LDS Church (to the exclusion of all other churches or religions) is the place to be. He almost concedes as much: “You might respond, Yes, but Paul’s teachings are the common heritage of all Christians—can’t this same scenario play just as well in any Christian church, or in any church at all? To that I respond, Perhaps.”
He then goes on to argue that the LDS Church is unique in the community that it fosters, primarily through its lay ministry and its geographic formation of congregations. Those really aren’t unique features of Mormonism or (I think) anything close to the most compelling argument for Mormon community. Other people, like Terryl Givens, have made more forceful arguments on that point. But I’m past judging people over their reasons for staying or leaving.
January 21, 2025
I thought this was a deeply thought about and studied book and really appreciate the author's insights and feelings. I recognize not all may appreciate it as I have; I took 11 pages of personal notes and quotes from the book.
Two of my favorite insights were: one, his interpretation of how Mary may have felt when the Savior was crucified and at the tomb when his body was taken. How her faith and her hope may have felt for not, yet she still loved him and wanted to believe.
Two, I also appreciate his sharing a metaphor from David Holland about the rocks the brother of Jared brought to the Lord. The brother of Jared self-admittedly offered a weak idea to provide light...rocks. Yet, he asked the Lord to touch the rocks so there might be a way to cross the ocean not in darkness. "At the end of the day, any offering that any of us individually brings to the Lord will always be hopelessly and categorically insufficient. The divinity that illuminates any of our individual offerings springs not from the offerings themselves but from the grace infused into them by the Lord." In other words, we need the Lord to make our efforts truly Christlike.
Dr. Johnson also sincerely wants church to be a safe place where all may feel the love of God. I couldn't help but think of church as a school...yes with imperfect teachers and imperfect students, but still striving to be a place to learn, grow, love, support, mourn with, and minister to each other.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1G...
Two of my favorite insights were: one, his interpretation of how Mary may have felt when the Savior was crucified and at the tomb when his body was taken. How her faith and her hope may have felt for not, yet she still loved him and wanted to believe.
Two, I also appreciate his sharing a metaphor from David Holland about the rocks the brother of Jared brought to the Lord. The brother of Jared self-admittedly offered a weak idea to provide light...rocks. Yet, he asked the Lord to touch the rocks so there might be a way to cross the ocean not in darkness. "At the end of the day, any offering that any of us individually brings to the Lord will always be hopelessly and categorically insufficient. The divinity that illuminates any of our individual offerings springs not from the offerings themselves but from the grace infused into them by the Lord." In other words, we need the Lord to make our efforts truly Christlike.
Dr. Johnson also sincerely wants church to be a safe place where all may feel the love of God. I couldn't help but think of church as a school...yes with imperfect teachers and imperfect students, but still striving to be a place to learn, grow, love, support, mourn with, and minister to each other.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1G...
May 28, 2025
The first half was amazing! I marked so many quotes that rang true to me. I felt that the last half wasn’t as focused and impactful. Definitely worth the read for me.
A few favorite quotes-
Sometimes, believing is hard. But, sometimes, life’s most transcendent experiences reveal themselves only to those who persist in belief through shattering periods of doubt.
And in our best incarnations we are not just there, but really there for all of it. What is the call to “minister” if not an invitation to do just that? Within our covenant Christian communities, there is no such thing as a sorrow that is meant to be born alone.
We would cock a skeptical eyebrow if a friend said, “You should really stop paying so much attention to your spouse’s virtues and focus on her/his vices. I’m afraid you’re guilty of confirmation bias.” And we would be right to be skeptical. In the same way, we should understand that if we fear jumping into the restored Christian life with both feet because it will expose us to allegations of confirmation bias, we may miss out on the sweet fruits that can come only from a lifetime of devoted discipleship. If I spend too much time dealing with historical accounts and the abstract details of theology, I can inadvertently pull myself away from the beating heart of restored Christianity.
I believe that even after a dark night of the soul, through the tenacity of faith and the reality of Christ’s grace, belief can be reborn into something new and beautiful, over and over and over again.
A few favorite quotes-
Sometimes, believing is hard. But, sometimes, life’s most transcendent experiences reveal themselves only to those who persist in belief through shattering periods of doubt.
And in our best incarnations we are not just there, but really there for all of it. What is the call to “minister” if not an invitation to do just that? Within our covenant Christian communities, there is no such thing as a sorrow that is meant to be born alone.
We would cock a skeptical eyebrow if a friend said, “You should really stop paying so much attention to your spouse’s virtues and focus on her/his vices. I’m afraid you’re guilty of confirmation bias.” And we would be right to be skeptical. In the same way, we should understand that if we fear jumping into the restored Christian life with both feet because it will expose us to allegations of confirmation bias, we may miss out on the sweet fruits that can come only from a lifetime of devoted discipleship. If I spend too much time dealing with historical accounts and the abstract details of theology, I can inadvertently pull myself away from the beating heart of restored Christianity.
I believe that even after a dark night of the soul, through the tenacity of faith and the reality of Christ’s grace, belief can be reborn into something new and beautiful, over and over and over again.
August 17, 2024
This book is so inspiring, so refreshing, so faith-filled and so beautiful! It is full of the author’s personal experiences and insights that really make you think. I just finished listening to it and I want to listen again right now! My heart is bursting!
This book touched me deeply and profoundly. It has inspired me to be a better disciple of Jesus Christ. I am buying copies to share because this message is to good to keep to myself!
I first found out about Tyler Johnson when I took a class he was teaching at BYU Education Week last summer. I loved that class so much and was excited to see that he had written a book. He is an oncologist, professor at Stanford, young adult institute religion instructor at Stanford, podcast host, parent, and author. His perspectives are fresh and thoughtful, especially when it comes to marginalized church members. He shares through his experiences how many traditional church cultures and doctrines are hurtful and damaging to some church members. We can be so much better! I believe Tyler shares in this book exactly what a disciple of Christ needs to be. I am so inspired.
This book touched me deeply and profoundly. It has inspired me to be a better disciple of Jesus Christ. I am buying copies to share because this message is to good to keep to myself!
I first found out about Tyler Johnson when I took a class he was teaching at BYU Education Week last summer. I loved that class so much and was excited to see that he had written a book. He is an oncologist, professor at Stanford, young adult institute religion instructor at Stanford, podcast host, parent, and author. His perspectives are fresh and thoughtful, especially when it comes to marginalized church members. He shares through his experiences how many traditional church cultures and doctrines are hurtful and damaging to some church members. We can be so much better! I believe Tyler shares in this book exactly what a disciple of Christ needs to be. I am so inspired.
January 13, 2025
I can’t adequately describe how moving this book was for me. It is one part exploration of the crucible of doubt we all face, and one part increasing understanding of the pain too often felt by those who feel they are on the fringes of church. Though I have my own personal ups and downs with religion, I have been relatively shielded to not have to face the painful and soul crushing realities which church presents for some of my loved ones. I have a better understanding that each individual’s journey may sometimes include a cessation of public worship in order to reorient the true purpose of their lives (whatever that looks like for them). For me I feel recommitted to collective empathy, addressing how my own religion gets in the way of true worship, and living with compassion for everyone. Very good book!
February 17, 2025
I enjoyed the book and loved the focus at the end of doing a better job building Zion. One story that stayed with me is Darius Gray, who felt prompted to join the church then faced some racism and persecution and STILL chose to stay in the church. This book addresses some areas where people might struggle or question such as finding faith in mortal prophets and those who feel marginalized in the church, but honestly, I thought he would delve in deeper and into more subject areas that are hard. Instead, he focuses quite a bit on belief and faith.
While the book was interesting, I don't think it was worthy of holding a whole Institute class on the book. (And I'm very surprised permission was granted for that purpose as it is not church-approved material.)
While the book was interesting, I don't think it was worthy of holding a whole Institute class on the book. (And I'm very surprised permission was granted for that purpose as it is not church-approved material.)
August 22, 2024
Very insightful and though-provoking. I admit my mind wandered as I listened to this at times. It wasn't the content, just me. There is a lot of meat here and I like how he champions staying the course and not abandoning faith when it seems like that is the only thing to do, while still validating the experiences of one who is struggling with the church, doctrine, or faith in general. I also appreciate his invitation for all church members to step up and work to succor, heal, and lift each other, rather than viewing someone in crisis with the attitude of "That's a you problem." Our covenants demand that we help build everyone up. That is very much an "us" problem and the solution is love.
December 23, 2024
I thought the author did a great job in helping readers understand why church might be hard for some and what we (strugglers and members alike) can do about it. I thought the book was sensitive and insightful, championing both the gospel and the church (however one might define it) and yet showing a that a more nuanced way of looking at Church membership and a more accepting "body of Christ" might be what is needed. I liked the examples and analogies given. I liked the author's respect for things I hold sacred, for those with questions, and for those who might not have any idea that others might be having a hard time, and for those who just want to understand. I will read this one again.
February 14, 2025
Read this book at the request of my mom, presumably as a way to convince me I need to stay in the church. It did not do that.
The author does an excellent job at putting a finger on the problems that so many people, especially young people, have with the church. But when he gets to his reasons for why those things shouldn't mean walking away it falls flat. His reasons range from "faith takes believing even when you aren't sure" to "if you leave you can't be like Jesus" and, my favorite, "you are a pinky finger of the church, not the brain. You don't know why the church does things just like the pinky finger doesn't know why the brain does things."
Great set up, terrible follow through.
The author does an excellent job at putting a finger on the problems that so many people, especially young people, have with the church. But when he gets to his reasons for why those things shouldn't mean walking away it falls flat. His reasons range from "faith takes believing even when you aren't sure" to "if you leave you can't be like Jesus" and, my favorite, "you are a pinky finger of the church, not the brain. You don't know why the church does things just like the pinky finger doesn't know why the brain does things."
Great set up, terrible follow through.
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