And Always One More Time: A Memoir

by Margaret Mandell

Every year, more than a million women find themselves grappling with the devastating loss of a life partner—a loss that shatters their present and leaves their future in doubt. At 65, Margaret Mandell faces this heart-wrenching reality when she loses her husband of 45 years to a fast-moving disease. The bed is now half-empty, her body betrays her, and laughter seems elusive.

In the depths of longing and haunted by memories, Mandell embarks on a journey of healing through the written word. She begins to write letters to the man she loved in a poignant process of retracing their shared history. But when a tender-hearted college professor steps quietly into her life and listens attentively as Mandell reads her accumulating stack of letters out loud, her world is transformed in profound and unexpected ways.

And Always One More Time is a story that delves deep into the human experience, reminiscent of C.S. Lewis's A Grief Observed in its wisdom and Joyce Carol Oates's A Widow's Story in its suspense. It offers universal truths about love, loss, and resilience, much like Steve Leder's The Beauty of What Remains. With potent and swift-moving words, this book can be devoured in a single sitting. It is a beacon of hope for those navigating the aftermath of the greatest loss.

Genres: Memoir

144 pages, Kindle Edition

First published March 12, 2024

Reviews

[Abby Hauptmann · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a true love story. I had the pleasure of meeting her on a plane and got to hear her story. As soon as we landed, I bought the book. I highly recommend reading!

[Fredricka Maister]

As a writer of personal essays on grief and healing, I was especially interested in reading Margaret Mandell’s debut memoir, “And Always One More Time.” Her book chronicles her journey mourning the devastating loss of her beloved husband of over 40 years, painfully adjusting to a life alone without him, and finding the courage and willingness to embrace a second chance to deeply love again. At 130 pages, this memoir can easily be read in a few sittings. I, on the other hand, took my time re-reading and savoring every paragraph in this eloquently written story of love, loss, and hope. My verdict after such a thought-provoking and satisfying reading experience: “And Always One More Time” is a must-read for anyone who is navigating or has navigated the loss of a loved one or, for that matter, anyone seeking an inspiring, uplifting story to read in these challenging times. My congratulations, kudos, and brava to Margaret Mandell. May she continue to heal and grow.

[Raymond Sherbaum Jr. · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a lover of books and a writer who is in the process of composing my own memoir, I learned about a book entitled And Always One More Time at a book fair held at a library celebrating local authors. I was privileged and honored to have had the opportunity to talk to author Margaret Mandell. We spoke for quite a while as she told me about her book and was so gracious to talk to me about the art of memoir writing. I was beyond thrilled! Margaret signed my book with a beautiful inscription, which I could not help reading repeatedly because of its emotional impact on me as a new writer.

When I got home after the book event, I began reading And Always One More Time. After reading the first few chapters, I was immediately drawn to the story; the eloquence of the words stirred my emotions. I found myself tearing up because of the author’s honesty and insight which made me think about events in my own life that come from a place of vulnerability. Margaret Mandell tells her story in such a way that I often felt I was reading poetry written in prose. The exquisite writing ushers the reader into the universality of loss and the ability to come full circle to emerge from the darkness to find that happiness is always a possibility.

[Ruth Mermelstein]

I love this book! Through Margaret’s letters and chapters, we share her deep love, loss and grief. We join her as she learns to function on her own, and then miraculously finds and accepts new love. Margaret realizes that two men can coexist in her heart. Both she and her new love honor her old love.
Margaret’s descriptions of her emotional journey, and some missteps, are particularly moving. We all lie in bed at night replaying past words and actions that we wish we could take back. Margaret bravely and dispassionately lays hers out on the page. We forgive her human foibles and hope she forgives herself.
We all suffer disappointments and loss. And Always One More Time assures us that we can find happiness again in the future.

[Carole A. · Rating 5 out of 5]

"And Always One More Time" is unique in its willingness to convey the angst of death and grief in a tone that is both brutally honest and filled with notes of resilience and hope. Thanks to her collection of the letters she wrote to her deceased husband, Ms. Mandell has created a format that allows the reader to engage with her in what feels like an in-person conversation. Her telling of her experience is short and sweet....it consists of easily digested essays that transition easily from one to the next while simultaneously blending different threads and themes. If you seek comfort at a difficult time, this story of loss and renewal is the one to read.

[Natalie Nowak · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked this book up from a little library in the neighborhood, which felt serendipitous because this is a memoir about losing a loved one; in the authors case her husband, in my case my mom to cancer.

It was a beautiful story giving readers hope that even after the worst can happen - loss of your most loved person, that life does go on and it can still be beautiful and there is hope.

I’m a bit too fresh in my grief to feel very optimistic, but it was nice to read this authors life story and I hope that things will get better for my family as well.

[Amelia Griggs · Rating 5 out of 5]

Unique and Moving Memoir About a Journey of Loss and Love

A heartfelt and eloquently written memoir filled with emotion, vulnerability, and hope.

I appreciated the author’s honest and detailed account of navigating the deep grief of losing a loved one, and the difficult yet inspiring journey of learning to live and love again.

The story is emotional, at times funny, and ultimately uplifting. A touching reminder that even after deep loss, it’s possible to open your heart and find love again.

[Carolina Marques Borges · Rating 5 out of 5]

An Elegant, warm, real, and beautiful book about Love in its many forms. I adore her writing style. Elegant yet simple. Her paragraphs are warm, honest, real. I could have finished reading this book in one weekend, however I decided to slow down my reading pace to not miss a thing (either a great laugh or a miserable cry). I have been recommending it to every single person that I encounter, including colleagues, students, and family.

[Sally Klein-Katz · Rating 5 out of 5]

This wonderfully unique memoir took me on a journey that had me soaring, laughing, and crying. I could sense, taste, feel and experience what Margaret shared in every page. Living through her words deep grief and tentative hope and loving again, left me feeling hopeful and happy. This is such a masterful memoir, very revealing, very honest, and humorous as well as extremely hopeful! An absolute must read! You won’t be able to put it down, I couldn’t!

[Dana Stein · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book as a gift in the afternoon. I sat down to read it early evening and could not put it down to the end. It is two love stories in one and so beautiful. This is story that can apply to many people who have lost a spouse or partner. I enjoyed it immensely and found it such an easy read. I would recommend this book to all.

[Olivia Klein · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simply wonderful. You’ve brought us all to beautiful, heart string pulling tears - like a masterfully played harp.. beautiful, calming, tearful, cheerful, and moving. The best kind. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

[Caitlin Cohen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Peggy brings signature joy and nuance to a complex and often conflicting emotional experience that many of us can barely imagine. This book is human, informative, kind, and also meticulously paced… a fun read, if such a thing can be said about a book on grief.

[Angela Hoy · Rating 5 out of 5]

A wonderfully written tribute to love and loss. Mandell's words carried me along through the curves in her journey as she faces the unknown and the unexpected. This story makes room for grief to abide alongside joy as it celebrates imperfection with cautious hope. Be sure to read the prologue!

[Maya Muir · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. It is truly a story of love, and loss, and love again. Mandell writes beautifully about the pain of losing someone you thought you'd have forever, and then the surprise of finding a new love. This book is about more than that, though. It's about family, community, and what it takes to make relationships work, and raise kids in a loving home. The book is slim, but it packs a punch. The writing is beautiful, and the pace fast--I was left simultaneously wanting more, but perfectly satisfied. This is a lovely book, a book to remember!

[KK · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautifully written book of love, loss and courage. Winding through time, Mandell takes the reader on a well-crafted path of discovery and reflection. I thoroughly enjoyed this book.

[Charissa Wilkinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a painful book to read, as you can feel the love Mrs. Mandell still holds for her husband.

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

This easily-read, tightly-woven literary tapestry traces an epic hero's journey. In a narrative of shining hope, Mandell moves from loving warmth through profound grief, emerging into a renewed capacity for radiant joy.

[Marguerite Chandler · Rating 5 out of 5]

Can a "one more time" relationship be worth it? Perhaps with generosity and compassion, we can learn to see with new eyes and love again. AND ALWAYS ONE MORE TIME by Margaret Mandell reads like a novel, but it's actually a beautifully-crafted memoir of loss--and the possibility of living newly. We read the author's love letters to her husband of 49 years who has suddenly died. She's left with the large suburban house they both cherished, many supportive friends, and two caring, adult children, but ultimately she's alone. We journey with her through the anguish she experiences, the choices she makes, the wrenching question she keeps confronting, "Who am I now?" while trying to get through each day and hold onto fragments of gratitude. She learns to love her body again. Her daughter marries. She moves into an apartment in the city. Her mother dies. She meets a man through Silver Singles, an on-line dating site. How do you learn to laugh at yourself and navigate the dating world at age 70? When you're finally able to feel the ground under your feet, how do you open your life to chaos and change? In the magic of this book, Margaret Mandell shows us the courage it takes to face her inevitable fears and reimagine herself through COVID, incompatibilities, and unrealistic expectations. There's much to learn from bitter times, but we also need to see that they can be a bridge to sweeter days. AND ALWAYS ONE MORE TIME by Margaret Mandell is both.