Horse Girl Fever: Stories

by Kevin Maloney

Horse Girl Fever is a hilariously weird collection, part autofiction, part outlandish daydream, that celebrates the horse girl within all of us.

From cult author of The Red-Headed Pilgrim, Kevin Maloney delivers a vision of the world that is hysterical, terrifying, and true. A cuckolded husband finds a new identity as a ghost. A homeowner has a nervous breakdown while building a pergola. An angst-ridden teenager finds his spiritual equal in the mosh pit of an Alice in Chains concert. 

In fourteen brutally funny stories, Horse Girl Fever plunges the reader into a world of misfits—inept drug smugglers, tattooed office workers, and philosophical strip club bouncers—who fumble toward the light but often end up flailing. Maloney’s writing conjures a dazzling spectrum of pain, joy, and humanity, peeking into the darkest corners of reality while high on Whippets.

Genres: Short Stories, Fiction, Horror

146 pages, Paperback

First published January 7, 2025

About the author

Kevin Maloney is the author of The Red-Headed Pilgrim (Two Dollar Radio, Jan 2023), Horse Girl Fever (CLASH Books, 2025), and Cult of Loretta (Lazy Fascist, 2015).

At times a TJ Maxx associate, grocery clerk, outdoor school instructor, organic farmer, electrician, high school English teacher, and teddy bear salesman, Kevin currently works as a web developer and writer. His stories have appeared in Hobart, Barrelhouse, Green Mountains Review, and a number of other journals and anthologies.

He lives in Portland, Oregon, five blocks from his very hot and talented fiancée Ryan-Ashley Anderson.

Reviews

[Grace Stafford · Rating 2 out of 5]

It’s fine, I guess. I’m just reminded why I don’t read many male authors.

[nathan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Major thanks to NetGalley and Clash Books for sending me an ARC of this book in exchange for my honest thoughts:

"𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥 [𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯] 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘨𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺, 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘶𝘱 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯."

THE Richard Brautigan of our modern times. I love everything that Clash Books puts out. Sharp. Witty. Inventive. And never boring. Beyond jejune, this titty-obsessed collection of stories delight, poke fun, and surprise in complete nonchalance.

[Sara Wiser · Rating 1 out of 5]

A great example of why white men shouldn't be allowed to write.

What started as a really exciting find turned into a genuinely disgusting and painful read. Every single story positioned the female characters as not only objects for the male's sexual fantasies & desires to be projected onto, but only seemed to value them when they were in states of inebriation and whacked out on ketamine (I'm not even kidding, this is literally what the 'Horse Girl Fever' story is referring to). The amount of times I had to read about the narrator playing with his own dried semen in this book should make me eligible for a fucking Severance-level full brain reset. The only story in this entire collection that was somewhat good was "Pergola", but even then, it had the same issues as before. Newsflash: just because you exist in poverty does not excuse fucking creep behavior.

[Lorin (paperbackbish) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you Clash Books for my free ARC of Horse Girl Fever by Kevin Maloney — available Jan 7!

» READ IF YOU «
🎠 were a horse girl, or loved one
😹 enjoy humorous, wacky short stories
💔 love silly stories but with heart

» SYNOPSIS «
This is a collection of stories by Kevin Maloney, 14 of them in fact. They're short and mostly outrageous, from the perspective (often) of a broken middle-aged man, or a pitcher on acid, or a teenager in a mosh pit. It's a wild bunch of stories, all different but entertaining!

» REVIEW «
I tend to prefer anthologies by a singular author, and Horse Girl Fever was no exception. It's a riot! The titular title was one of my favorites, but truly I enjoyed them all. Though hilarious and outrageous and full of silly situations, there is a lot of heart between the pages of this book, and I definitely found that it will linger with me for a while. I'll be seeking out more Kevin Maloney for sure!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[Laura Donovan · Rating 5 out of 5]

“There was this boy, Lester MacDougall, a name that almost demands a bloody nose.”

“I locate a giant. He has a goatee. His t-shirt says, ‘I shit bigger than you.’ This seems true.”

“Dance like John Travolta or I’ll kill you.”

There are dozens of laugh out loud one-liners in this 140-page book of no skips short stories. The author, Kevin Maloney, is no stranger to heartbreak and disappointment, yet all his stories are infused with humor, humility, and a little hope that things might work out better next time. This short collection spans a decade of life in Portland, pre and post-pandemic. Many of these stories are timeless (unreliable transportation is always an issue in Portland), and others are a harsh reminder that 2015 was a decade ago (Candy Crush comes up a lot and crushes my soul a little bit with each reference). Kevin Maloney shows us the fleeting nature of modern trends and even the worst kind of feelings. This bicentennial baby is the ideal candidate to write a story called 1776. This is a fun ride from start to finish.

[Zach Zoeller · Rating 4 out of 5]

My favorite part about Kevin Maloney’s fiction is that it makes you want to write and to be alive.

[Curtis · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has big "Pete from Ghosts" vibes. It's always worth keeping a friend who's always getting cheated on, it helps you feel better about yourself.

[Ben · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fantastic book if you need a punch of alt-lit to liven up your reading diet.

[programmira · Rating 1 out of 5]

Would give 0 if I could. Misogynistic to its core. Not naming the women in his book but calling them Hannah #1 #2 #3? U serious? Who publishes a book like this in 2025. objectifying them all! Women are just sexual objects to him and he has 0 shame in showing that.

[Meg Scarbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

omg I loved this weird lil book. I did feel like it started on a high and fizzled out by the end but I enjoyed them all nonetheless. and that cover alone deserves alllll the stars

thx to my besties at netgalley for a copy of this arc in exchange for an honest review

[Andreas · Rating 2 out of 5]

consistently weird and sometimes funny, but I reckon I would have enjoyed it more if I was straight (or if I had a breeding kink)

[Austin Zamudio · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Horse Girl Fever" is so stupid in all the right ways. Maloney had me legitimately laughing out loud from his deadpan humor and general nonsense.

My favorite stories are: Horse Girl Fever; Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard; and, Epicenter.

I appreciate how the titular story was the third one in. So often, that story is nestled deep within a collection, and it was refreshing to see it so early. It's clear why "Horse Girl Fever" was chosen as the namesake.

As the collection progresses, it seems like Maloney struggled to tow the line of genuine inventive humor and "quirky alternative white guy humor." It turns out that you CAN have too many stories about depressed and messy straight guys.

Overall, I recommend "Horse Girl Fever" as a silly, short palette cleanser. When the humor hits, it hits hard. Unfortunately, when it misses, it's just really cringe.

[Carina Stopenski · Rating 4 out of 5]

a compelling collection with equal parts introspection and silliness. autofiction can be hit or miss for me, but since that was only a sliver of this collection i found it was easier to get through. i thought it was also very cool to have a through line of different locales or themes in the stories to have a tether between them.

[Xanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilariously (sym)pathetic, endearingly cringe-inducing.

I did not exactly feel like the target audience –most of these are first-person stories about a man struggling after a divorce–but I really enjoyed this collection, that (mostly) chronicles male anxiety. So much so, actually, that I read half of it in the bookstore and then decided to buy it, even if just because I felt Kevin Maloney deserved the sale for making me laugh out loud so much.

[Kenzie Keaton · Rating 2 out of 5]

i really enjoyed the first four or so stories but then they all became very repetitive….. very much “i’m a man and i do drugs and everyone hates me and i’m a failure but i’m not doing anything to change it” and maybe i just hate men but it got annoying real fast LOL

[Lindsey Woods · Rating 2 out of 5]

an angry, coke ridden short story collection of a mid life crisis

can any woman exist in this author’s world without being an object?

the back cover described the collection as brutally funny - found jt brutal, but hardly funny

[Lizzy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kevin Maloney seems to be obsessed with women and drugs. These stories are all batshit insane, fever dreamy and pretty nonsensical at times, but I really enjoyed them

I have no clue how someone could even come up with half these stories, some people's imaginations are... very unique...

[Maddy Lunde · Rating 3 out of 5]

damn this shit barely had any horses in it fr

[Krista Reynolds · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't know wtf I just read, but I couldn't put it down. Each story manages to suck you in quickly and have you questioning the words on the page. I loved it and can't wait to check out any other work he has.

[Kasie Cavanagh · Rating 5 out of 5]

☕☕☕☕☕ Five Cups of Coffee. Brilliant.

I would love to be in the mind of this author.
Maybe.
Maybe not.

This was a find at a local indie bookstore known as Book + Bottle in Saint Pete, Florida. It was the last copy on the shelf. I have been introduced to a whole new world by this publisher, Clash.

I’m gonna give you all the trigger warnings in the world. Done. Perfect. Now you have them.

Horse Girl Fever: 14 Short Stories by Kevin Maloney.

You have to read a story or two and then take a break because these stories are like pulling the curtain back and looking inside someone’s soul.

I liked Hannah’s and Horse Girl Fever stories so far.

I felt like I was on a teeter totter and trying to play the game Operation or Perfection. It’s that constant spinning feeling, as if surrealism is swallowing you whole, and slow, because surrealism is a python or a boa.

This book is genius. I tell you, simply genius.

For me, this could be a new version of the series Tales From the Loop or Electric Dreams. Name it what you want, but I pick:
After School Special About Your Potential Future Adult Life.
Yes. Let’s start there.

@kevinrmaloney
@clashbooks

Stories That Made Me Feel Something (and Why)

Hannah’s
Pure unapologetic ridiculousness. A surrealist version of the Stepford Wives. Of course, this is just my opinion.

Horse Girl Fever
If I were born gender male, I imagine this is exactly how my life would have went. I am very impressed how true lies are the ones we tell ourselves. This author is not afraid to expose.

Wrath of the Red Eyed Wizard
Even though this short story was a neurotic episode of The Bachelor, in the end you find what you’re looking for in a partner in the most unexpected places at the most unexpected times, and that’s when it becomes truth.

Malaria Diaris
My favorite fever dream story I have ever read. The train wreck about to happen, but the train is on fire and it never stops. The wreck actually does not come to fruition. The two lovers wake up not knowing if they’re alive or dead. You gotta read it.

End Times, Charleston Avenue
I like this story because you get to look inside someone else’s yard during COVID times. I always wondered what everybody else was doing. What were we doing? Well, if you read this story, you will know exactly what it was that we were doing. Man, were all of us doing the same thing?

Epicenter
Because they want an entire movie written and centered around a 370 lb man who is a bouncer at a strip club but also doubles as the girl’s choreographer and medic.

Thoughts That Stuck With Me

Something I question is the author thinks his beautiful family, Loud Turkey, and his son Fennel Fox. I don’t know if those are their real names. I feel like after I read this book, potentially they are.

Then I turn the page to the end and I get to see a picture of the author, and the entire time I read this book I had a different image in my head. So thanks for that. It was unexpected.

Ohh, you wanna know why? Wait. It was unexpected. I was expecting a serial killer profile picture. But really, what does the serial killer look like?

I look forward to reading some of these other books that are listed in the back by the publishing company. I also look forward to seeing Kevin Maloney contributing to a potential new series on a streaming service.

Quotes

“Hanna #3’s vagina was like a telescope eye piece.”

“September dragged a wool sweater across the sky and our clandestine subaquatic master aboard Tory club got nipped in the bud by the start of a new school year.”

“18 year old boys with drug connections were the priests and redeemers of the existentially meaningless suburbs of Portland OR in the mid 1990s.”

“But for a few months she was mine and I loved her stupidly and completely and I rooted for her in the dark like a child after a night of bad dreams.”

“I start crying. And lets me. It’s my turn. In our relationship, we take turns being insane. My time is now.”

“I am willing to accept all personality flaws for a lifetime of physical love.”

“I want to be their sadness and their experience. Mostly I want the heroine of their shaved beaver, a minute lost in the nadir of their youth and then I want to disappear and be dead forever.”

“Every time I see her I imagine a baby deer falling out of its mother’s Regina standing up all wobbly legged and like Bambi those big dumb eyes looking at the world like it’s a brand new thing I want to get down on my knees and wrap my arms around her and smell the deer vagina on her skin.”

“I have discovered something middle-aged women are incredible at sex the world is full of them it’s like finding out that topsoil can get you as high as cocaine.”

“The room smelled like cunnilingus and pineapples.”

“My whole life I kept falling in love with the wrong people and now I’m found someone that made my teeth hurt I loved her so much but I was probably dying from parasites today.”

“He stumbled from our Hut like newborn babies popping out of our mother’s vagina is covered in slime.”

“They were magic underwear said Astrid when you die you get to your own planet.”
I love this quote most specifically because I enjoy theology and different people’s perspectives on the subject.

“When a beautiful woman dances for a piece of shit like you your job is to watch and say thank you and tell her how pretty she is you don’t cry like your dog just died.”

“But the robitussin makes me see angels every time I cough.”

“10,000 words long the approximate length at which story becomes the novella.”
I appreciate this quote because the author is actually referencing something that Rachel and I debated all the time. A novella versus a short story versus an essay versus a chap book.

The author puts a quote from Wikipedia in the book:
Dock Ellis threw a no hitter on June 12th, 1970. He later stated he accomplished the feat under the influence of LSD. Well, based on the source you could decide whether or not it’s true. Then I’m pretty sure if you read this particular book on LSD you’d have a few things to say to Wikipedia.

[Bethany · Rating 5 out of 5]

“A few days later at recess, Horse Girl and Max disappeared behind the janitor’s shed for almost thirty minutes. When they reappeared, Horse Girl’s sweatshirt was on backwards. In confidence, Max informed us that they’d done basically everything, including kissing with their mouths open. He said that while their spit went back and forth, her eyes straightened out, and the surprise of her uncrooked gaze gave him the power of a Jedi Knight.

This sounds crazy, but it was around this time that Max became frighteningly good at dodgeball. First, he hit Larry Weaver square in the glasses and shattered them. Then he hit Leonard in the kidney, and Leonard had to have some kind of operation. Then he pegged me in the forehead, and I lost the ability to read for six months and had to repeat fifth grade.”

- from “Horse Girl Fever”

The first words that come to mind regarding HORSE GIRL FEVER are absurd, appalling, and downright hilarious. This collection of autofiction features an array of characters snagged in the threads of self-imposed disasters, often amplified under the influence of intoxicants. Maloney’s bold narrative voice delivers a unique level of abrupt insanity that made me gawk at the page in dismay. I couldn’t help but read passages aloud to anybody in close proximity (including my boss, which was…a choice on my part), and needless to say, just about everyone was invested.

“Hannahs,” for example, follows a freshly divorced individual that finds himself haunted by hints of his ex wife, Hannah, in just about every woman he meets following their split. Every woman is another Hannah, whether that be their real names by coincidence or that be the guy’s skewed perception of reality trying to make light out of a disorienting situation.

“King of the Pit” involves a pair of inebriated Lollapalooza attendees beating the shit out of each other before collectively deciding to become friends and let go of their tumultuous pasts. All the while, others in the sticky crowd are flinging each other into the air. (My mom got a good chuckle out of this one, saying, “Yeah, this is exactly what it was like during Alice in Chains.”)

“1776” is a 4th of July story covering a feverish man dancing with his partner on her rooftop amongst angels and fireworks and dead people. Though he is high off of couch syrup, he realizes just how screwed up America actually is and always has been.

These are just a fraction of the pieces that have stuck with me long after I finished them, but my favorite has to be “The Informant.” It doesn’t get much better than a dipshit tripping on stolen pills, snitching on himself in the most comical scenario possible.

“I sat on a chair and kicked my legs up on the cashier’s desk, which reminded me that I had legs.

‘Are you high on drugs?’ he asked.

‘Bing,’ I said, pointing my finger at one of the centipedes floating through the air, shooting it with a laser beam.’

‘Bing?’ he asked.

‘I don’t think it’s safe in here. I’ve never seen a gas station crawling with so many bugs.’

It was true. They were everywhere. It was a wonder they kept their water so clean.

I guess I said something interesting, because suddenly there were six or seven cashiers surrounding me, all of them asking questions. Things like: “Why are you in Arizona?’ and ‘Are you transporting drugs across state lines?’

I tried to be coy, but the pills I took made it impossible for me to lie. I confessed that my buddy Spider and I were hauling 25 pounds of black tar heroin from Mexico to Portland, which we hoped to unload for about two million dollars.”

- from “The Informant”

I’ve seen the label “fever dream” being thrown around here and there, and while I agree, I’d even go further to add that this is a full on tripping balls experience. Literally. I wasn’t keeping track, but I’m nearly certain that just about every story involves a character getting absolutely blitzed on substances. While drugs play a major motif connecting each story, I feel like their purpose acts mainly as a catalyst toward self-destruction or self-realization in the lives of characters undergoing bleak circumstances.

The shock value may catch you off guard at first, but deep down there lies a deeper message behind every piece, often featuring situations that would normally present themselves as upsetting. Grief, rejection, and angst show up as frequent themes, either served as consequences to the protagonists’ own actions or handed to them by those dear to them. The execution of blunt sincerity reminds me of the punk songs my mom used to introduce me to growing up. At first, we used to keel over at just how diabolical some of the lyrics were, but later, she’d show me that “no, see, this issue is what they were getting at beyond the humor.” Was it the comedy that enhanced the truth, or the truth that enhanced the comedy?

What I enjoy most about HORSE GIRL FEVER is how earnest these narratives are. Maloney isn’t afraid to strip his characters down to the very shame that prompts them to make questionable choices. These characters, rooted in allusions to reality, long for understanding and connection. Even the most aimless of protagonists stumble their way toward accountability and, in some cases, hope for a more graceful future ahead.

Doesn’t that make you want to give this collection your attention? I’m tempted to start over from the beginning and enjoy it a second time.

“‘It’s cold,’ I say, meaning the beer, but Anne knows I really mean: ‘This earth. The darkness that is waiting.’

I start crying. Anne lets me. It’s my turn. In our relationship, we take turns being insane. My turn is now.

I cry, and the collar of my Pendleton shirt gets dark from tears.

Sugar ants crawl up my pant leg seeking sugar.

Fuck off, little ones.

I’m building a pergola. A crooked one. No one will find their way in.”

- from “Pergola”

[Alyssa · Rating 2 out of 5]

DNF about 60% of the way through. I'm very tired of fiction about mediocre white men being mediocre and expecting a great deal of sympathy for their terrible life, caused by their terrible decisions. The absurdism was interesting but holy cow. The straights are not ok. If I never read another book in my lifetime that gives no traits to women beyond the physical features of their reproductive anatomy, it will be too soon. I probably shouldn't even be typing this but honestly, when can we move beyond misogyny as a defining literary feature of "the edge"? Like what if we just didn't?

[Plague Rat · Rating 1 out of 5]

Every story is repetitive and has the same extract themes and plotting.

40 something man wronged by a woman goes on a bender. Sees women through the lense of wanting to sleep with them or take photos of their ‘beaver’ and mentions owning or wanting to own a hot tub.

There. Just saved you having to read 14 of the exact same short story.

[Kat Yoakum · Rating 3 out of 5]

I get it you like Denis Johnson

[Ashley · Rating 4 out of 5]

"I was in a lot of pain, so I decided to stay on the ground for a while. It was sort of pleasant. A soft rain fell from the sky. I watched those tiny droplets fall through the yellow glow of a security light and wondered if any part of me was broken. Then I realized pretty much all of me was broken and wouldn't get any better, and that's why people have to die one day, to make room for a less fucked up generation."

When I first heard about this book, all that kept jumping out at me was how many times it was touted as "funny" - which, honestly, sort of made me hesitant. I have a less than stellar history with books that are described so heavily as hilarious, but, if Horse Girl Fever is comedic in any way, it's in the darkly tragic way life is also comedic, it feels horrible but you can't help but laugh at the absurdity. From the blurb of this book I could never have guessed how deeply affecting it would be, nor did I imagine so many ruminations on suicide and addiction, or such a deep exploration of the most gruesome parts of life. I could never have guessed that such a short, whimsical little novel could be as bleak or impactful as this.

There's just something so magical about the intensity of this book that makes me more than a little sure that the author is well acquainted with heartbreak and suffering, which does make the experience feel so much more authentic. From start to finish, Horse Girl Fever is fun, but, it's also fucking horrible. Bleak, despairing literature like this will always make me proud to be a reader. Witty and beyond inventive, delightful but also bizarre, this messed up little book is story after story of the broken and defeated. Not many authors could achieve, or would dare even try to achieve what Kevin Maloney has here, sure, some try, but authenticity is everything, to impart this level of bleakness onto your readers, you have to truly understand.

"In 1996 a mutual acquaintance, a home burglar named Eddie told Horse Girl that he was out of coke but had something way cooler. She jammed the needle in her arm and finally those pretty horses ran free over the grassy hills of her doped brain. About a year later she died, and when the paramedics made her walk again, she was a shattered, cross-eyed Christ. But for a few months she was mine and I loved her, stupidly and completely, and I rooted for her in the dark like a child after a night of bad dreams."

The single biggest compliment I can give this novel is that it made me want to start writing again, it made me realize once again, how happy I am to be right here, to exist in a time when this book also exists. It's a very strange experience, and sort of makes you feel as if you've been drugged yourself, but, reading Horse Girl Fever also makes you realize something, just how utterly pedestrian most books we're sold actually are. I will forever root for literature that's daring enough to challenge the status quo. Long nights sat up smoking, discussing the end of the world, discussing your eventual death and what happens when you're gone, discussing the literature that changed you the most, that's the exact feeling this novel will have you chasing.

"Everything is terrible, which is why alcohol will always be holy. I want somebody to murder me, but first I want Martha. We are the last people in this experiment. Everybody else is dead. You can tell from their eyes. They look hopeful."

[Robert Warf Burke · Rating 5 out of 5]

This collection is a wild ride and one that is deceptively longer than its 115 pages would indicate. I mean this latter part in the best way possible.

The first half of the collection, up until "The Informant," straddles this beautiful line of humor and magical realism, and does so very effectively. Stories like "Ghost," "Hannahs," "Horse Girl fever," "The Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard," and "Epicenter," all operate in this realm of reality seen through the gonzo eyes of each stories narrator--of which you could argue is a similar character in each. These early stories up until "The Informant," are really compelling, with tons of excellent lines and sequences. One of my favorites sequences was from "Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard" where the narrator finds himself hooking up with Janet Schmidgall (what a name lol) whom he initially dislikes. The lines near the end of this story, "I've discovered something: middle-aged women are incredible at sex. The world is full of them. It's like finding out that topsoil can get you as high as cocaine," represents the killer humor Maloney employs throughout these pieces. Really there's a ton of hilarious one liners and observations--particularly observations of the self that the narrators find themselves expressing.

Around the time of "The Informant," the stories transition into two categories. The first being stories that are almost full gonzo acid territory. Stories like "No-No" or "Bloop" would be examples of this. They are smartly very short--which is good as they feel the longest in the collection. This is more so due to them requiring more of your attention, but the writing is always excellent in these. The other stories in this final third of the book are what I describe as a cross between the earlier stories, but more based in reality--and especially based in Covid. I find the latter choice with regard to Covid to slow down the overall pacing of the collection, but I was still so compelled with Maloney's writing and voice, I could care less about reading about Covid. And the final story, "Epicenter"--so fucking good! I won't spoil anything about it, but I love Gravedigger!!

That is to say, go read this collection--it's not one you'll forget from an author you won't want too either.

[Ashton · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Horse Girl Fever" is a contemplation on the intersections of drug abuse, alcoholism, and white male audacity, with a hefty dose of sexual maladjustment for good measure. A slew of first person protagonists limp their way through life without any meaningful differences between them. Every short story could, in tone and in actuality, be various chapters from the same protagonist's life. This makes the succinct stories blend together in an unholy way, leaving very little ground for one rumination to stand out above another.

"Horse Girl Fever" does partially redeem itself with its writing quality. Its sharp prose and blunt descriptions create an engaging and original tone. But on the whole, I found myself simply racing to the end of this collection, ready to wrap it up in the hasty fashion all of its stories were.

[V ❣️ · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of the best - and funniest - short story collections I’ve read.

A man who only dates women named Hannah, a bloody duel in an Alice In Chains mosh pit, malaria filled mosquitos, crying when building a pergola, cocaine everywhere, and of course - Horse Girl.
Every one of these stories flows seamlessly with one another, and the nostalgic factor is at its peak. Hilariously entertaining, perfectly paced, whimsical and stream of conscious. This is best read when you’ve just been kicked out of a strip club, in the alleyway with the neighborhood rats. Chefs kiss.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher who provided me with an ebook copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All of these thoughts and opinions are my own.

[Kris V · Rating 4 out of 5]

First time reading Maloney’s writing. This story collection feels semi-autobiographical and fantastical thanks to the drug use detailed throughout.
What I got from it ultimately is he loves women, is fascinated and haunted by them hence the title, Horse Girl Fever. He’s also very prideful of being from Portland, a city I’ve yet to visit. Great read on a line-by-line basis, more than half of the stories broke my heart for the narrator. Such longing to be seen, and for life and love to have meaning.
It’s a small book so recommend for anyone looking for easy to read, original writing that’s at times beautiful and at others heartbreaking.

[:D · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is weird and cyclical but also kind of fun. I expected it to be short stories that weren’t linked to each other, like “The Illustrated Man”. It was more like “Sidewalk Dancing”, but I liked that book a whole lot more than this one.
Found myself laughing sometimes. I didn’t really like this book but it was slightly endearing to me and was easy read so I finished it.

I don’t know what it’s like to be an insecure, serial-divorcing man but I did feel the ups and downs of life in this read.
Favorite chapters were all in the middle: “King of the Pit” “Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard” and “Pergola”.