Horse Girl Fever: Stories

by Kevin Maloney

Horse Girl Fever is a hilariously weird collection, part autofiction, part outlandish daydream, that celebrates the horse girl within all of us.

From cult author of The Red-Headed Pilgrim, Kevin Maloney delivers a vision of the world that is hysterical, terrifying, and true. A cuckolded husband finds a new identity as a ghost. A homeowner has a nervous breakdown while building a pergola. An angst-ridden teenager finds his spiritual equal in the mosh pit of an Alice in Chains concert. 

In fourteen brutally funny stories, Horse Girl Fever plunges the reader into a world of misfits—inept drug smugglers, tattooed office workers, and philosophical strip club bouncers—who fumble toward the light but often end up flailing. Maloney’s writing conjures a dazzling spectrum of pain, joy, and humanity, peeking into the darkest corners of reality while high on Whippets.

Genres: Short Stories, Fiction, Horror

146 pages, Paperback

First published January 7, 2025

About the author

Kevin Maloney is the author of The Red-Headed Pilgrim (Two Dollar Radio, Jan 2023), Horse Girl Fever (CLASH Books, 2025), and Cult of Loretta (Lazy Fascist, 2015).

At times a TJ Maxx associate, grocery clerk, outdoor school instructor, organic farmer, electrician, high school English teacher, and teddy bear salesman, Kevin currently works as a web developer and writer. His stories have appeared in Hobart, Barrelhouse, Green Mountains Review, and a number of other journals and anthologies.

He lives in Portland, Oregon, five blocks from his very hot and talented fiancée Ryan-Ashley Anderson.

Reviews

[Grace Stafford · Rating 2 out of 5]

It’s fine, I guess. I’m just reminded why I don’t read many male authors.

[nathan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Major thanks to NetGalley and Clash Books for sending me an ARC of this book in exchange for my honest thoughts:

"𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥 [𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯] 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘺𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘨𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯’𝘵 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘺, 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘮 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘶𝘱 𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯."

THE Richard Brautigan of our modern times. I love everything that Clash Books puts out. Sharp. Witty. Inventive. And never boring. Beyond jejune, this titty-obsessed collection of stories delight, poke fun, and surprise in complete nonchalance.

[Lorin (paperbackbish) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank you Clash Books for my free ARC of Horse Girl Fever by Kevin Maloney — available Jan 7!

» READ IF YOU «
🎠 were a horse girl, or loved one
😹 enjoy humorous, wacky short stories
💔 love silly stories but with heart

» SYNOPSIS «
This is a collection of stories by Kevin Maloney, 14 of them in fact. They're short and mostly outrageous, from the perspective (often) of a broken middle-aged man, or a pitcher on acid, or a teenager in a mosh pit. It's a wild bunch of stories, all different but entertaining!

» REVIEW «
I tend to prefer anthologies by a singular author, and Horse Girl Fever was no exception. It's a riot! The titular title was one of my favorites, but truly I enjoyed them all. Though hilarious and outrageous and full of silly situations, there is a lot of heart between the pages of this book, and I definitely found that it will linger with me for a while. I'll be seeking out more Kevin Maloney for sure!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[Laura Donovan · Rating 5 out of 5]

“There was this boy, Lester MacDougall, a name that almost demands a bloody nose.”

“I locate a giant. He has a goatee. His t-shirt says, ‘I shit bigger than you.’ This seems true.”

“Dance like John Travolta or I’ll kill you.”

There are dozens of laugh out loud one-liners in this 140-page book of no skips short stories. The author, Kevin Maloney, is no stranger to heartbreak and disappointment, yet all his stories are infused with humor, humility, and a little hope that things might work out better next time. This short collection spans a decade of life in Portland, pre and post-pandemic. Many of these stories are timeless (unreliable transportation is always an issue in Portland), and others are a harsh reminder that 2015 was a decade ago (Candy Crush comes up a lot and crushes my soul a little bit with each reference). Kevin Maloney shows us the fleeting nature of modern trends and even the worst kind of feelings. This bicentennial baby is the ideal candidate to write a story called 1776. This is a fun ride from start to finish.

[Sara Wiser · Rating 1 out of 5]

A great example of why white men shouldn't be allowed to write.

What started as a really exciting find turned into a genuinely disgusting and painful read. Every single story positioned the female characters as not only objects for the male's sexual fantasies & desires to be projected onto, but only seemed to value them when they were in states of inebriation and whacked out on ketamine (I'm not even kidding, this is literally what the 'Horse Girl Fever' story is referring to). The amount of times I had to read about the narrator playing with his own dried semen in this book should make me eligible for a fucking Severance-level full brain reset. The only story in this entire collection that was somewhat good was "Pergola", but even then, it had the same issues as before. Newsflash: just because you exist in poverty does not excuse fucking creep behavior.

[Zach Zoeller · Rating 4 out of 5]

My favorite part about Kevin Maloney’s fiction is that it makes you want to write and to be alive.

[Curtis · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has big "Pete from Ghosts" vibes. It's always worth keeping a friend who's always getting cheated on, it helps you feel better about yourself.

[Ben · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fantastic book if you need a punch of alt-lit to liven up your reading diet.

[programmira · Rating 1 out of 5]

Would give 0 if I could. Misogynistic to its core. Not naming the women in his book but calling them Hannah #1 #2 #3? U serious? Who publishes a book like this in 2025. objectifying them all! Women are just sexual objects to him and he has 0 shame in showing that.

[Meg Scarbie · Rating 4 out of 5]

omg I loved this weird lil book. I did feel like it started on a high and fizzled out by the end but I enjoyed them all nonetheless. and that cover alone deserves alllll the stars

thx to my besties at netgalley for a copy of this arc in exchange for an honest review

[Andreas · Rating 2 out of 5]

consistently weird and sometimes funny, but I reckon I would have enjoyed it more if I was straight (or if I had a breeding kink)

[Austin Zamudio · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Horse Girl Fever" is so stupid in all the right ways. Maloney had me legitimately laughing out loud from his deadpan humor and general nonsense.

My favorite stories are: Horse Girl Fever; Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard; and, Epicenter.

I appreciate how the titular story was the third one in. So often, that story is nestled deep within a collection, and it was refreshing to see it so early. It's clear why "Horse Girl Fever" was chosen as the namesake.

As the collection progresses, it seems like Maloney struggled to tow the line of genuine inventive humor and "quirky alternative white guy humor." It turns out that you CAN have too many stories about depressed and messy straight guys.

Overall, I recommend "Horse Girl Fever" as a silly, short palette cleanser. When the humor hits, it hits hard. Unfortunately, when it misses, it's just really cringe.

[Carina Stopenski · Rating 4 out of 5]

a compelling collection with equal parts introspection and silliness. autofiction can be hit or miss for me, but since that was only a sliver of this collection i found it was easier to get through. i thought it was also very cool to have a through line of different locales or themes in the stories to have a tether between them.

[Xanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilariously (sym)pathetic, endearingly cringe-inducing.

I did not exactly feel like the target audience –most of these are first-person stories about a man struggling after a divorce–but I really enjoyed this collection, that (mostly) chronicles male anxiety. So much so, actually, that I read half of it in the bookstore and then decided to buy it, even if just because I felt Kevin Maloney deserved the sale for making me laugh out loud so much.

[Kenzie Keaton · Rating 2 out of 5]

i really enjoyed the first four or so stories but then they all became very repetitive….. very much “i’m a man and i do drugs and everyone hates me and i’m a failure but i’m not doing anything to change it” and maybe i just hate men but it got annoying real fast LOL

[Lindsey Woods · Rating 2 out of 5]

an angry, coke ridden short story collection of a mid life crisis

can any woman exist in this author’s world without being an object?

the back cover described the collection as brutally funny - found jt brutal, but hardly funny

[Maddy Lunde · Rating 3 out of 5]

damn this shit barely had any horses in it fr

[Krista Reynolds · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't know wtf I just read, but I couldn't put it down. Each story manages to suck you in quickly and have you questioning the words on the page. I loved it and can't wait to check out any other work he has.

[Alyssa · Rating 2 out of 5]

DNF about 60% of the way through. I'm very tired of fiction about mediocre white men being mediocre and expecting a great deal of sympathy for their terrible life, caused by their terrible decisions. The absurdism was interesting but holy cow. The straights are not ok. If I never read another book in my lifetime that gives no traits to women beyond the physical features of their reproductive anatomy, it will be too soon. I probably shouldn't even be typing this but honestly, when can we move beyond misogyny as a defining literary feature of "the edge"? Like what if we just didn't?

[Plague Rat · Rating 1 out of 5]

Every story is repetitive and has the same extract themes and plotting.

40 something man wronged by a woman goes on a bender. Sees women through the lense of wanting to sleep with them or take photos of their ‘beaver’ and mentions owning or wanting to own a hot tub.

There. Just saved you having to read 14 of the exact same short story.

[Kat Yoakum · Rating 3 out of 5]

I get it you like Denis Johnson

[Ashley · Rating 4 out of 5]

"I was in a lot of pain, so I decided to stay on the ground for a while. It was sort of pleasant. A soft rain fell from the sky. I watched those tiny droplets fall through the yellow glow of a security light and wondered if any part of me was broken. Then I realized pretty much all of me was broken and wouldn't get any better, and that's why people have to die one day, to make room for a less fucked up generation."

When I first heard about this book, all that kept jumping out at me was how many times it was touted as "funny" - which, honestly, sort of made me hesitant. I have a less than stellar history with books that are described so heavily as hilarious, but, if Horse Girl Fever is comedic in any way, it's in the darkly tragic way life is also comedic, it feels horrible but you can't help but laugh at the absurdity. From the blurb of this book I could never have guessed how deeply affecting it would be, nor did I imagine so many ruminations on suicide and addiction, or such a deep exploration of the most gruesome parts of life. I could never have guessed that such a short, whimsical little novel could be as bleak or impactful as this.

There's just something so magical about the intensity of this book that makes me more than a little sure that the author is well acquainted with heartbreak and suffering, which does make the experience feel so much more authentic. From start to finish, Horse Girl Fever is fun, but, it's also fucking horrible. Bleak, despairing literature like this will always make me proud to be a reader. Witty and beyond inventive, delightful but also bizarre, this messed up little book is story after story of the broken and defeated. Not many authors could achieve, or would dare even try to achieve what Kevin Maloney has here, sure, some try, but authenticity is everything, to impart this level of bleakness onto your readers, you have to truly understand.

"In 1996 a mutual acquaintance, a home burglar named Eddie told Horse Girl that he was out of coke but had something way cooler. She jammed the needle in her arm and finally those pretty horses ran free over the grassy hills of her doped brain. About a year later she died, and when the paramedics made her walk again, she was a shattered, cross-eyed Christ. But for a few months she was mine and I loved her, stupidly and completely, and I rooted for her in the dark like a child after a night of bad dreams."

The single biggest compliment I can give this novel is that it made me want to start writing again, it made me realize once again, how happy I am to be right here, to exist in a time when this book also exists. It's a very strange experience, and sort of makes you feel as if you've been drugged yourself, but, reading Horse Girl Fever also makes you realize something, just how utterly pedestrian most books we're sold actually are. I will forever root for literature that's daring enough to challenge the status quo. Long nights sat up smoking, discussing the end of the world, discussing your eventual death and what happens when you're gone, discussing the literature that changed you the most, that's the exact feeling this novel will have you chasing.

"Everything is terrible, which is why alcohol will always be holy. I want somebody to murder me, but first I want Martha. We are the last people in this experiment. Everybody else is dead. You can tell from their eyes. They look hopeful."

[Robert Warf Burke · Rating 5 out of 5]

This collection is a wild ride and one that is deceptively longer than its 115 pages would indicate. I mean this latter part in the best way possible.

The first half of the collection, up until "The Informant," straddles this beautiful line of humor and magical realism, and does so very effectively. Stories like "Ghost," "Hannahs," "Horse Girl fever," "The Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard," and "Epicenter," all operate in this realm of reality seen through the gonzo eyes of each stories narrator--of which you could argue is a similar character in each. These early stories up until "The Informant," are really compelling, with tons of excellent lines and sequences. One of my favorites sequences was from "Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard" where the narrator finds himself hooking up with Janet Schmidgall (what a name lol) whom he initially dislikes. The lines near the end of this story, "I've discovered something: middle-aged women are incredible at sex. The world is full of them. It's like finding out that topsoil can get you as high as cocaine," represents the killer humor Maloney employs throughout these pieces. Really there's a ton of hilarious one liners and observations--particularly observations of the self that the narrators find themselves expressing.

Around the time of "The Informant," the stories transition into two categories. The first being stories that are almost full gonzo acid territory. Stories like "No-No" or "Bloop" would be examples of this. They are smartly very short--which is good as they feel the longest in the collection. This is more so due to them requiring more of your attention, but the writing is always excellent in these. The other stories in this final third of the book are what I describe as a cross between the earlier stories, but more based in reality--and especially based in Covid. I find the latter choice with regard to Covid to slow down the overall pacing of the collection, but I was still so compelled with Maloney's writing and voice, I could care less about reading about Covid. And the final story, "Epicenter"--so fucking good! I won't spoil anything about it, but I love Gravedigger!!

That is to say, go read this collection--it's not one you'll forget from an author you won't want too either.

[Ashton · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Horse Girl Fever" is a contemplation on the intersections of drug abuse, alcoholism, and white male audacity, with a hefty dose of sexual maladjustment for good measure. A slew of first person protagonists limp their way through life without any meaningful differences between them. Every short story could, in tone and in actuality, be various chapters from the same protagonist's life. This makes the succinct stories blend together in an unholy way, leaving very little ground for one rumination to stand out above another.

"Horse Girl Fever" does partially redeem itself with its writing quality. Its sharp prose and blunt descriptions create an engaging and original tone. But on the whole, I found myself simply racing to the end of this collection, ready to wrap it up in the hasty fashion all of its stories were.

[V ❣️ · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of the best - and funniest - short story collections I’ve read.

A man who only dates women named Hannah, a bloody duel in an Alice In Chains mosh pit, malaria filled mosquitos, crying when building a pergola, cocaine everywhere, and of course - Horse Girl.
Every one of these stories flows seamlessly with one another, and the nostalgic factor is at its peak. Hilariously entertaining, perfectly paced, whimsical and stream of conscious. This is best read when you’ve just been kicked out of a strip club, in the alleyway with the neighborhood rats. Chefs kiss.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher who provided me with an ebook copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All of these thoughts and opinions are my own.

[Kris V · Rating 4 out of 5]

First time reading Maloney’s writing. This story collection feels semi-autobiographical and fantastical thanks to the drug use detailed throughout.
What I got from it ultimately is he loves women, is fascinated and haunted by them hence the title, Horse Girl Fever. He’s also very prideful of being from Portland, a city I’ve yet to visit. Great read on a line-by-line basis, more than half of the stories broke my heart for the narrator. Such longing to be seen, and for life and love to have meaning.
It’s a small book so recommend for anyone looking for easy to read, original writing that’s at times beautiful and at others heartbreaking.

[:D · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is weird and cyclical but also kind of fun. I expected it to be short stories that weren’t linked to each other, like “The Illustrated Man”. It was more like “Sidewalk Dancing”, but I liked that book a whole lot more than this one.
Found myself laughing sometimes. I didn’t really like this book but it was slightly endearing to me and was easy read so I finished it.

I don’t know what it’s like to be an insecure, serial-divorcing man but I did feel the ups and downs of life in this read.
Favorite chapters were all in the middle: “King of the Pit” “Wrath of the Red-Eyed Wizard” and “Pergola”.

[Tiffannie · Rating 5 out of 5]

📚✨ Hey, fellow weird girl book lovers, you’re in for a treat! I’m absolutely obsessed with Horse Girl Fever! Each story is a sharp, nostalgic gem, effortlessly blending into a brilliantly entertaining read. Whether it's a guy with a thing for dating only Hannah's or wild escapades involving a whole lot of cocaine, this collection is perfect for a quirky, delightful escape. Grab it and dive in—especially if you’re settling in from an unexpected spot. You’re going to love every minute! Thank you for the ARC!

[Steph Kvellestad · Rating 5 out of 5]

Horse Girl Fever is everything that I LOVE in a short story collection. It is a little weird, a little wonderful, and absolutely well-written. I received the ARC this morning and I just finished it a few minutes ago. If you're like me, then clear your afternoon. It's time to read.

If you're looking for your next short story read, be sure to check out Horse Girl Fever!

Many thanks to NetGalley and CLASH Books for the ARC!

5/5 Stars

[🐌]

i wish some of the stories were longer. these were all previously published in various magazines and i can kinda tell. like the trope of middle aged guy who was scorned by a woman and now is going on a bender got old very quickly. im not next to the book rn so i might update this later but my fav stories were the ghost guy and the teenager moshing. my least favorite was horse girl fever and the one with the wizard tattoo.