Coming of Age: Growing up Muslim in Australia

by Amra Pajalic (Editor), Demet Divaroren (Editor)

In this refreshing and fascinating collection, twelve Muslim-Australians - some well known, some not - reveal their candid, funny and touching stories of growing up with a dual identity.

Muslim people in Australia come from over seventy countries and represent a wide variety of cultural backgrounds and experiences. Yet we are constantly bombarded by media stories feeding one negative stereotype. What is it really like to grow up Muslim in Australia? In this book, famous and not-so-famous Muslim-Australians tell their stories in their own voices.

The beard, the hijab, the migrant - these are all familiar images associated with Muslim people. But delve deeper and there are many other stories: the young female boxer entering the ring for her first professional bout; a ten-year-old boy who renounces religion; a young woman struggling to reconcile her sexual identity with her faith. These honest and heartfelt stories will resonate with all readers, providing different snapshots of Muslim life in Australia, dispelling myths and stereotypes, and above all celebrating diversity, achievement, courage and determination.

'Coming of Age is the kind of book that will change how readers look at the world... Coloured with many shades of humour, warmth, sadness, anger, determination and honesty, it will resonate with readers from all backgrounds and beliefs.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Australia, Religion, Essays, Anthologies, Biography

200 pages, Paperback

First published February 1, 2014

About the author

Amra Pajalić is an award-winning author, educator, and PhD researcher of Bosnian heritage whose work explores how fiction represents the Bosnian genocide.

Amra Pajalić won the 2009 Melbourne Prize for Literature's Civic Choice Award for her debut novel The Good Daughter, now re-released as Sabiha's Dilemma (Pishukin Press, 2022). The anthology she co-edited, Growing up Muslim in Australia (Allen and Unwin, 2014), was shortlisted for the 2015 Children's Book Council of the year awards and her memoir Things Nobody Knows But Me (Transit Lounge, 2019) was shortlisted for the 2020 National Biography Award. Her short story collection The Cuckoo's Song (Pishukin Press, 2022) features previously published and prize-winning stories.

She is the author of the Sassy Saints series, Sabiha's Dilemma, Alma's Loyalty, and Jesse's Triumph, and the forthcoming Seka Torlak historical-mystery series, beginning with the prequel The Tree That Stood Still and the first book in the series Time Kneels Between Mountains. Her companion essay collection Fragments of History: The Essays Behind the Story, examine the legacy of the 1995 Srebrenica genocide.

She works as a high school teacher and is completing a PhD in Creative Writing at La Trobe University exploring representations of the Bosnian genocide in fiction. Her work blends storytelling with historical analysis to confront dehumanisation and preserve cultural memory. Her website is www.amrapajalic.com.

Amra Pajalic also writes romance under pen name Mae Archer
https://www.goodreads.com/mae_archer

Be sure to follow Amra on BookBub for the latest on sales https://www.bookbub.com/authors/amra-...

Reviews

[Ruby · Rating 4 out of 5]

I finished this book with tears in my eyes. What an amazing insight it was for me, a white bread, non-Muslim woman living comfortably and without conflict in a culture that NEVER questions me, ostracises me, simplifies my beliefs, vilifies me, tokenises me... How I have taken that for granted.

I also realised (with some discomfort) how many stereotypes I had in my own mind about Islam and Muslims. I was very interested to read, for example, that Muslim communities have existed in Australia since the 1800s. For some reason, I assumed that Islam in Australia was a relatively modern phenomenon.

The coming of age stories made me realise what a tricky business it is for young Muslims to be caught between two cultures, often never really fitting neatly into either. It would be a great high school book to include in an English curriculum, to get young people talking about these sorts of issues.

Also, I really enjoyed the spectrum of people and cultures that contributed to the book, and their very diverse relationship to their faith. I was glad to read about devout Muslims, lapsed Muslims, and also those who had to reconcile their faith with their sexuality or other beliefs.

I have always been curious about what life must be like, growing up following a faith that attracts so much stigma and misunderstanding. It must be weird to be constantly linked with terrorism or not recognised as a 'real' Muslim.

How important these books are. How overdue it has become for people to engage in a proper dialogue about this stuff.


I was so moved by this book I wrote to one of the editors, something I have never done before. This was a very thought-provoking book that I would recommend to anyone wanting to read more about what it is to be a modern Australian Muslim.

[Rania T · Rating 4 out of 5]

Growing up in Australia's multicultural spaces always has its set of challenges, whatever background you are from, but more so when you are negotiating your identity during the trials and tribulations of adolescence. There are countless memoirs, articles, fiction pieces and films that explore 'coming of age' in the Australian literary canon that have made their mark in shaping aspects of this nation's psyche.

Enter the Australian Muslim 'coming of age experience.' Although mainstream media has painted an image of Muslims as one homogenous body that challenges the very existence of the 'Australian' way of life, this is far, far, far from the truth. The stories in this collection show us that what it means to be Muslim in Australia is shaped by so many factors be they cultural, environmental, physical, emotional, or spiritual. That to pigeonhole somebody within the confines of a particular perception or stereotype because of what you have been lead to believe, rather than making the effort to find out is just not on.

The diversity of the experiences of every writer who has contributed to this collection, means that anybody reading will be able to relate in some way. This book will make an excellent addition to any secondary school library and is a great teaching resource, being a good meditation on adolescence in this country.

This book also shows us that in the end, we are all the same, and should confront our prejudices and challenge stereotypes in any shape or form. It would be great to read more stories such as these, and look forward to more in the future.

[Annie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Growing up a Muslim, hijab wearing Aussie of Indonesian heritage, I related to this book and the stories within very much. Sadly, the battle is real and when we say this, it's not to play victim - it's simply to call it what it is. These honest stories resonated with me and I believe them to be insightful for all readers as it provides different snapshots and perspectives of Muslim life in Australia that most importantly, dispel myths, stereotypes, and above all celebrates diversity, courage and friendship. A beautiful coming of age book that is said to be "coloured with many shades of humour, warmth, sadness, anger, determination and honesty, it will resonate with readers from all backgrounds and beliefs" I really enjoyed reading these short stories and quite fun to read stories by people I know..

[Kelsey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Such a great book, and destined for high school curriculum I'm sure. Suitable for any YA readers.

Every featured story is interesting; some resonate more than others, but all contributors have something worthwhile to say. All experienced downright meanness from other people growing up merely because of ethnic/religious difference, which is so sad and so unnecessary. While white people were not the only ones guilty of this, all contributors experienced racism on various levels from white people, which is shameful. Some literally never found a white friend, even when they tried. Disgusting. But none let this experience define them, and none let it abate their affections and loyalties to their adopted country. Not all of the writers are even still Muslim and yet they suffer discrimination for being Muslim anyway. My own personal feelings is that bogan Australian culture could learn a lot from people who manage to enjoy themselves ~without alcohol and ~without oversexualisation of everything/everyone, but it's a culture firmly convinced it knows everything already and is always right, so I'm thinking that will never happen. It's a shame.

Many of the contributors are professional writers, and I've added their listed works to my ever-growing TBR list.

[Serena · Rating 4 out of 5]

So far I am finding this novel really thoughtful, insightful and educational. Listening to people and their stories is a great way to learn.
So far I have loved the stories. Growing up in a Eurocentric Australia, keeping faith, the divide between cultures, dealing with discrimination, being an atheist however being identified as 'Muslim' by white Australians due to being born in Iran, being an LGBTIQ Muslim Australian. These stories also explain Islam and how each person connects with their faith differently.

Some stories have brought tears to my eyes. I recommend this novel highly.

[Ali · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book has been out for awhile, and since its release, Black Inc have been releasing anthologies with similar titles, but a slightly different format. It was impossible not to compare these differences - in particular, the recent releases contain far more contributions. I missed the extra diversity - not only in experience but also in writing style and approach to the brief.
Having said that, the twelve contributions here are all very strong. Most memorable for me was perhaps xxx's account of growing up in a multiplicity of communities, each of which is flattened into a single identity in our public narratives: the contrast between the richness of her world, and the inability of stereotypes to accommodate it. I also appreciated the window into Michael Muhammad Ahmad's life, having long been a fan of his work.

[Emmaby Barton Grace · Rating 5 out of 5]

not technically part of the growing up in australia series by black inc books - but nonetheless, the same premise and i really enjoyed/got a lot out of it. with that being said, i feel this fell short in comparison by having a much more limited range of stories (though i guess that meant each story could be longer...) - though, i did appreciate there was still some diversity in having one written by a lesbian, another from country australia, coming from a diverse range of background etc.

i am definitely an ignorant white australian when it comes to knowing anything about religion (christianity included!) so it was interesting to learn more about islam - it had never even occurred to me that there are different types of muslims - and that some of these are minorities/there can be considered a community hierarchy where some may be viewed as ‘less’ muslim

other themes that stood out: the tensions of growing up in multiple cultures/religions - and being ‘too muslim’ for australia but ‘not muslim enough’ at the same time; the need for role models and representation - especially intersectional ones (e.g., queer muslims); the ignorance of australians; impact of internalised racism/islamophobia, what the hijab represents

alyena mohummadally and randa abdel-fattah’s pieces stood out to me the most - exploring body image and queerness as a woman and a muslim

a quote that stood out: “i wanted to make sure i wasn’t seen by australia as an exception - oh, but he’s one of the good ones”

[Zahra · Rating 3 out of 5]

A great eye-opener to the inside struggles of adolescent Muslims. Thumbs up!

[B. R. Kyle (Ambiguous Pieces) · Rating 3 out of 5]

General Observations:
~Technicality: Now, I understand that this book is a short story anthology with multiple authors (some of whom are men) and that Amra Pajalic and Demet Divaroren are the editors of this book. however as I’ve before stated, about 50% of the short stories are written by women who may have multiple heritage and personal identity labels, but the majority of them do identify with the Australian way of life (though being Australian is not the only identifier they have and that’s perfectly fine). So I’m including it in the Australian Women Writer’s Challenge.

~Basic Overview: My favourite parts were the introduction chapters, as the authors gave brief description of what their specific Islamic culture and practices, what their ethnic background, how those two identity labels worked together was and how it could separate from other people who identify with Islam and Australian. For those who are worried that is book has heavy theological discussions, don’t worry it doesn’t and while it some stories do contain references to particular verses in the Quran, it’s mostly short and explained with footnotes. So even for someone like myself, who has no knowledge of Islamic culture, the references were easy to understand.

~Narrative Elements: I’m not usually into short story anthologies but Coming of Age worked for me. All the writers had interesting but different stories to tell,they all had different cultural influences and were all in different stages of their life (you know, just like regular people). The stories were well written and engaging. This book should most certain be mandatory reading for VCE. however, there were consistent cultural differences with Australian culture and similar reactions from the authors even though they all had different experiences (though a lot of them did originate from the surrounding suburbs of Sydney in New South Wales). I have noticed that immigrants who show a talent or interest in Sports do tend to have more positive experiences with Australian culture or blend in with Australian culture easier (though it’s not always a guarantee). It did highlight things I was already aware of like how the Australian Education System does very little to help accommodate students who speak a language other than English at home and how Australians should place a higher value on academical discipline over sporting achievement. I also loved reading about the inter-generational households, the majority of my cousins and extended family lived either in New South Wales or Queensland, so I never had that inter-generational contact growing up.

~Time Marches On: With current events happening, books like these need to be written, published and read. However, with books like these, there is a risk of events like the Cronulla riots (it’s difficult to believe that it’s been over ten years since that happened) and the 2002 Bali Bombings from becoming dated. Although I know most Australians would like to think that Racial Tensions with Islamic communities are a thing of the past, however recent conflict surrounding The Bendigo Mosque and The Daily Show’s coverage of the 2013 Australian Election campaign prove otherwise.

[Natasha (jouljet) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Coming Of Age: Growing Up Muslim In Australia Eds Amra Pajalic and Demet Divaroren

An anthology of 12 people's stories of often being a teen in Australia, whilst working through the cultural differences of being Muslim in a predominantly white, Christian society.

This collection features broadly different stories and experiences, and the diversity of cultural backgrounds as is the Muslim communities in Australia. From managing one's own acceptance of faith, to strict family rules, to trying to fit in, or deal with racism. Being the cultural mediator for parents is a strong theme, a story many first generation Aussies will tell.

This is a good, but seemingly simplified collection of stories, perhaps because it was marketed for young readers. An introduction to individual differences and experiences of Islam, different expressions of faith, and ways of honouring one's background in often hostile times and environments. But also of personal triumph and identity affirmation.

Read during Ramadan, to contribute to my understanding of this important time in the yearly calendar for so many in Australia.

[Zak · Rating 5 out of 5]

Although I very highly disagree with much contents of the book I found it to be inextricably honest and intriguing. The anthology is composed of various perspectives from young Muslims(or Muslim associated) young teens growing up in Australia in the late nineties to early 2000s. Unsurprisingly, it reaffirms the idea of perspectivism and the multifaceted nature of human identity by sharing such a wide range of different 'Muslims'. Each with their own unique relationships with Islam some rejecting it and others being completely devoted. The consistent surfacing of various political issues that effected Muslims, including the 9/11 attack, the Bali bombings and the 2000 Sydney Gang rapes, were effective in reminding us of the prejudice nature of labels. An inspiring rugby player who works with the youth and a fanatic suicide bomber may both call themselves Muslims, however, they are two completely separate entities whose actions are independent of each other and the label they attach to themselves. Amra calls us to judge distinctly rather than following our instinct of believing the generalisations that we make of various communities.

[Read3r’z Re-Vu · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Muslim people in Australia come from over 70 countries and represent a wide variety of cultural backgrounds and experiences. Yet we are constantly bombarded by media stories feeding one negative stereotype. What is it really like to grow up Muslim in Australia? In this book, famous and not-so-famous Muslim-Australians tell their stories in their own voices.”
Growing up a Muslim, hijab wearing Aussie of Indonesian heritage, I related to this book and the stories within very much. Sadly, the battle is real and when we say this, it’s not to play victim – it’s simply to call it what it is. These honest stories resonated with me and I believe them to be insightful for all readers as it provides different snapshots and perspectives of Muslim life in Australia that most importantly, dispel myths, stereotypes, and above all celebrates diversity, courage and friendship. A beautiful coming of age group that is said to be “coloured with many shades of humour, warmth, sadness, anger, determination and honesty, it will resonate with readers from all backgrounds and beliefs”

- Annie

[Aj · Rating 3 out of 5]

Underwhelming.

I was expecting something great, and this book really did not deliver. Some of the stories were quite powerful, but most... were not.

The combination of reddit atheism, hypocrisy, fatphobia, and more presented in this collection was disappointing.

There were some positives, essays that explored personal connection and conflict with Islam in the context of a mostly white Australia.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautiful stories of the Muslim experience in Australia. All the contributors bring a unique perspective and it’s a must read for Aussies… especially if you want to be aware of how your actions affect others.

[Helen · Rating 3 out of 5]

A terrific collection of short essays by Australian Muslims.

[Elfrida Shade · Rating 4 out of 5]

Although I myself am not Muslim I found this book helped me to gain a better insight into the Muslim population. Thank you so much for helping me better understand my fellow teens beliefs and values.

[juLiA · Rating 3 out of 5]

Only read a few of the stories and they were written very genuinely. This is a great book about those lost voices in Australia.

[Sarah Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this anthology. It was nice to read about lived experiences that so closely resemble my own. Representation matters for this very reason.

[Patch Hadley · Rating 3 out of 5]

This collection of short memoirs shares the challenges of growing up Muslim in Australia. I love that the focus of Coming of Age is on the struggles of being a young person, irrespective of religion. This makes the authors relatable to junior readers everywhere.

I wondered if there were going to be girls like me from the Middle East. Would there be any Muslim students in my class? And how many of them would have just arrived in Australia as I had? Would they speak Arabic like me? Would I be able to keep up with the schoolwork? Would I make friends? – Muslim Footprint by Arwa El Masri page 84

Coming of Age features “mishmash” Muslims who migrated from all over the globe, or who, despite being born in Australia, are still viewed as “Other”. Instead of focusing on religion – risking alienating many readers – this book is about being a teen, making friends, and fitting in.

I love how these stories encourage us to let go of preconceived ideas. They prove how often our generalisations are wrong. These authors describe growing up in a range of contexts. I think the strong sporting feature is perfect for Australian junior readers, as sport is ingrained in Australian culture and is a crucial melting pot for social acceptance amongst school kids. Reading about boys and girls from Muslim backgrounds in these contexts reminds us that everyone should be allowed to be and do whatever they dream.

I didn’t know what the right path was for me; I didn’t know what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I felt I should have all the answers and it scared me that I didn’t. I was always trying to please others before pleasing myself. I wanted to be accepted but I didn’t known how to accept myself – Fighting Spirit by Bianca Elmir page 35

Some of the stories focus on body image, rebelling against parents, and not knowing what direction to take after school. In these stories, being Muslim has little or nothing to do with the author’s struggles. Reading these experiences shows us that they share our journey and are the same as us.

I wasn’t strong enough to face a society that would judge me because of what I was wearing without knowing me – Muslim Footprint by Arwa El Masri page 88

I strongly feel Coming of Age has the power to create change in the attitudes of young people. In Australia, we’re surrounded by people with different backgrounds and beliefs, but who share our struggles and have incredible stories to tell. I hope this book can help young readers stop seeing Muslim people as “Other”, and accept them as friends who are on the same journey.

This review can also be found on my blog Paige's Pages.

[AnnetteW · Rating 3 out of 5]

Part of the blurb on the back of this book says that it "peels back the stereotypes". While in some cases this was definitely true, I actually found that quite a few stories reinforced stereotypes! The female kickboxer told by her soccer coach that she needed to play a sport where she could hit someone; the rugby league star constantly surrounded by groups of young men spoiling for a fight; the young men with their hypocritical drinking and taking drugs while praying 5 times a day, using and abusing and denigrating western women but sending home for virgin brides; the taxi driver telling his passenger what he would do if he had Salman Rushdie in his cab; the young people subjected to more racism and religious bias by other branches of Islam and their compatriots than from local Aussies; I felt all these images perpetuated views of Muslims held by so many people. With some exceptions I also felt that the book could have been called Growing up Muslim in just about anywhere in the West, there didn't appear to me much that was uniquely Australian about most of the experiences. While I certainly appreciate the struggles of one sort or another faced by all the authors and admire their courage and tenacity in forging their own path, for me a strict religion is just another obstacle placed in the way of anyone trying to grow up and navigate the road to a good life in the 21st century. It is not an easy time to be a young person and anything that makes you feel separated from others and ultimately yourself just makes life harder. Sadly that's what religion and strict cultural practices can do, although the goals of both are diametrically opposed to what is actually often the result. I found it telling that so many of the stories were about struggles against families who had done their best by bringing their families to Australia for a better life but had been unwilling or unable to understand that they were coming to a vastly different culture; one that has inherent in its fairly unrestricted lifestyle, so many temptations and offers of a totally new way of looking at, and doing things. All power to all those people who have managed to stay true to themselves while embracing a different way and making a space for themselves. We make it easy for people to come to Australia but sadly we don't always offer help or understanding once they are here. And that also makes it difficult for young people in particular.

[Alyce · Rating 3 out of 5]

liked that they had a variety of different stories and even though some of them clashed with each other, one about a guy losing his religion and another about finding strength in religion, it still revolved around being viewed as muslim. Was good to have diversity, so each story had a different message.

[Helena Rann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another brilliant addition to “Growing Up… In Australia”. Time and time again we see these groups “othered” in Australian society, when we are really so diverse that there can be no other. These books are always a timely reminder that we all have our own growing up story and we are all individuals.

[Zohal · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.25 Stars

[Aaron · Rating 5 out of 5]

An interesting read, 12 autobiographical entries from different people of how it was to grow up Muslim in Australia.