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Breaking Butterflies
The closest he will ever come to happiness is when he's hurting her. Will she let him? A beautiful and twisted story of first love and innocence lost -- written when the author was just eighteen.
Sphinxie and Cadence. Promised to each other in childhood. Drawn together again as teens. Sphinxie is sweet, compassionate, and plain. Cadence is brilliant, charismatic. Damaged. And diseased. When they were kids, he scarred her with a knife. Now, as his illness progresses, he becomes increasingly demanding. She wants to be loyal -- but fears for her life. Only the ultimate sacrifice will give this love an ending.
Sphinxie and Cadence. Promised to each other in childhood. Drawn together again as teens. Sphinxie is sweet, compassionate, and plain. Cadence is brilliant, charismatic. Damaged. And diseased. When they were kids, he scarred her with a knife. Now, as his illness progresses, he becomes increasingly demanding. She wants to be loyal -- but fears for her life. Only the ultimate sacrifice will give this love an ending.
272 pages, Hardcover
First published April 1, 2014
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954 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 209 reviews
July 5, 2014
I don't even really know where to start with this book. While reading it all I could think was "this reading is somehow intoxicating but this story is really one of the worst I have ever read." So, I guess you can take that for what it is.
From the first page I was a fan of the writing, it was strong, pretty and sucked me in as fast as could be. I enjoyed Sphinx's (yes, her mother named her Sphinx) voice even though I didn't really come to like her for who she was. The pace of the story was also really fast, stuff kept happening, people kept moving, emotions kept rising and that really kept me engrossed in the story. It was a trainwreck really, you know you shouldn't look but you just can't take your eyes off of it.
Ok, now I have run out of nice things to say about this book. The actual storyline was probably one of the worst I have ever read and it led me to shake my head and laugh out loud while reading it often (and the latter was not for HA-HA reasons, it was for YOU-HAVE-GOT-TO-BE-FUCKING-KIDDING-ME reasons.) Essentially the story is about a girl and a boy who were born to women who were best friends. These best friends had made a pact when they were younger that one would have a boy, the other would have a girl, then their offspring would get together and have babies and they would become grandmothers together. Everything went according to plan until the boy came out a sociopath. Sphinx is a good girl with a strong head on her shoulders but Cadence is unable to feel emotions of any sort. He doesn't understand what it is to feel for someone, or react to occurrences around him in an emotional way. I think here is where my biggest problem with the story lies. See, Cadence was literally a textbook sociopath. It's like the author looked up the definition and encompassed everything she read into this one guy and didn't give us anything to make us feel for him. He was terrible in every scene he was in, he felt absolutely nothing and he was just a fucking dick. I am well aware that this is how sociopaths are but in the scope of this story it just made everything not work. It didn't make sense that people would feel emotionally connected to him in any way and it left me, the reader, hating everything about him.
The utter harshness of Cadence's character also led me to question other characters in the novel. For some reason, unbeknownst to me, Sphinx feels a connection to him. She fights to be there for him in any way that she can even when he is utterly terrible to her at every turn. You guys, he literally NEVER did anything nice in this book. NOT ONCE. These two were friends when they were kids but after Cadence cut Sphinx's face with a Swiss Army knife his mother packed him up and they moved to London. This was when they were 10, at 16 Cadence gets sick and says he wants to see Sphinx so his mom flies her and her mom out to be with him. After all that time apart, after him CUTTING HER FACE WITH A KNIFE, she feels this intense loyalty that even makes herself consider KILLING HERSELF when he dies so that they can go out of this world together and have it be ART. I shit you not folks, this is the story, I wouldn't believe it if someone relayed it to me either. Perhaps the “glue that held these two together” was supposed to be their need to fulfill the pact that their mother’s had made when they were younger but I am just not buying any of that mumbo jumbo.
I really don't have it in me to rant about this rubbish anymore so I am going to cut myself off there but just stay away. Stay far, far away. It really is sad though because I think the writing was strong, but the story was just so bad that no amount of impeccable writing could have ever saved it.
An Advanced Reader's Copy was provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
--
For more of my reviews, visit my blog at Xpresso Reads
From the first page I was a fan of the writing, it was strong, pretty and sucked me in as fast as could be. I enjoyed Sphinx's (yes, her mother named her Sphinx) voice even though I didn't really come to like her for who she was. The pace of the story was also really fast, stuff kept happening, people kept moving, emotions kept rising and that really kept me engrossed in the story. It was a trainwreck really, you know you shouldn't look but you just can't take your eyes off of it.
Ok, now I have run out of nice things to say about this book. The actual storyline was probably one of the worst I have ever read and it led me to shake my head and laugh out loud while reading it often (and the latter was not for HA-HA reasons, it was for YOU-HAVE-GOT-TO-BE-FUCKING-KIDDING-ME reasons.) Essentially the story is about a girl and a boy who were born to women who were best friends. These best friends had made a pact when they were younger that one would have a boy, the other would have a girl, then their offspring would get together and have babies and they would become grandmothers together. Everything went according to plan until the boy came out a sociopath. Sphinx is a good girl with a strong head on her shoulders but Cadence is unable to feel emotions of any sort. He doesn't understand what it is to feel for someone, or react to occurrences around him in an emotional way. I think here is where my biggest problem with the story lies. See, Cadence was literally a textbook sociopath. It's like the author looked up the definition and encompassed everything she read into this one guy and didn't give us anything to make us feel for him. He was terrible in every scene he was in, he felt absolutely nothing and he was just a fucking dick. I am well aware that this is how sociopaths are but in the scope of this story it just made everything not work. It didn't make sense that people would feel emotionally connected to him in any way and it left me, the reader, hating everything about him.
The utter harshness of Cadence's character also led me to question other characters in the novel. For some reason, unbeknownst to me, Sphinx feels a connection to him. She fights to be there for him in any way that she can even when he is utterly terrible to her at every turn. You guys, he literally NEVER did anything nice in this book. NOT ONCE. These two were friends when they were kids but after Cadence cut Sphinx's face with a Swiss Army knife his mother packed him up and they moved to London. This was when they were 10, at 16 Cadence gets sick and says he wants to see Sphinx so his mom flies her and her mom out to be with him. After all that time apart, after him CUTTING HER FACE WITH A KNIFE, she feels this intense loyalty that even makes herself consider KILLING HERSELF when he dies so that they can go out of this world together and have it be ART. I shit you not folks, this is the story, I wouldn't believe it if someone relayed it to me either. Perhaps the “glue that held these two together” was supposed to be their need to fulfill the pact that their mother’s had made when they were younger but I am just not buying any of that mumbo jumbo.
I really don't have it in me to rant about this rubbish anymore so I am going to cut myself off there but just stay away. Stay far, far away. It really is sad though because I think the writing was strong, but the story was just so bad that no amount of impeccable writing could have ever saved it.
An Advanced Reader's Copy was provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
--
For more of my reviews, visit my blog at Xpresso Reads
November 21, 2014
1½ Stars
One word? Chilling. Breaking Butterflies, although has passages of brilliance, the storyline was not only unique, but was based on one characters mental illness which was portrayed with shock and horror. But the overall storyline was unhinged. It follows the story of Sphinx, who begins by telling us how her mother met Cadence's mother all those years ago. How the two created a pact to always follow their dreams, marry and both bare children for them to grow together and marry. Childhood promises that followed both women into adulthood, and yes, they were both devastated with Cadence's diagnosis as it destroyed the vision of the future both women still held.
Ladies, you're grown women. Your daughter is a doormat and the other, your son is one snap away from mass killings. Think it might be time to let that dream slide.
Sphinx had always been the quiet one, allowing Cadence even as children to dictate the terms of their twisted friendship. Although the adults in his life sensed there may have been an issue with the boy's mental health, no one chose to pursue it. It wasn't until he took to Sphinx with a flick knife, and only then did his mother pack him up and leave the country, running from the issue that increasingly needed to be addressed. Both mother's only cared about their friendship with eachother, and not the toxic friendship these two children had. So when we forward to after Cadence is diagnosed, I expected that perhaps he was finally seeking help.
But he was diagnosed with Leukemia, not a mental illness.
In a sick sense of obligation, Sphinx takes it upon herself to provide a sense of happiness during Cadence's last days. But now with a terminal illness, he has been given the freedom to do and say what he pleases and his mother and Sphinx only enable his behavior. His estranged friend actually begins to believe that she can make a difference, that Cadence actually wants her there, but he only wants to continue to hurt her. And it's not only Sphinx that suffers the consequences. Cadence's character was everything I'd expect him to be, sinister, malicious and cold. His character is unlike any of seen in young adult, and although I was horrified, I couldn't put it down. It was akin to watching a horror, covering your eyes, bracing yourself and reading on the edge of your seat.
But I couldn't enjoy it. It wasn't badly written, but the storyline was just so incredibly disturbing that I really didn't know what the overall message of Breaking Butterflies was. That parents can be irresponsible and let you down? That as long as you're dying, you can mentally and physically abuse others? That it's alright to find yourself attracted to a sociopath, because the passion in which he inflicts the pain captivates you? Definitely one for mature young adult reader that enjoys dark psychologically disturbing storylines. The cover is lovely though.
One word? Chilling. Breaking Butterflies, although has passages of brilliance, the storyline was not only unique, but was based on one characters mental illness which was portrayed with shock and horror. But the overall storyline was unhinged. It follows the story of Sphinx, who begins by telling us how her mother met Cadence's mother all those years ago. How the two created a pact to always follow their dreams, marry and both bare children for them to grow together and marry. Childhood promises that followed both women into adulthood, and yes, they were both devastated with Cadence's diagnosis as it destroyed the vision of the future both women still held.
Ladies, you're grown women. Your daughter is a doormat and the other, your son is one snap away from mass killings. Think it might be time to let that dream slide.
Sphinx had always been the quiet one, allowing Cadence even as children to dictate the terms of their twisted friendship. Although the adults in his life sensed there may have been an issue with the boy's mental health, no one chose to pursue it. It wasn't until he took to Sphinx with a flick knife, and only then did his mother pack him up and leave the country, running from the issue that increasingly needed to be addressed. Both mother's only cared about their friendship with eachother, and not the toxic friendship these two children had. So when we forward to after Cadence is diagnosed, I expected that perhaps he was finally seeking help.
But he was diagnosed with Leukemia, not a mental illness.
In a sick sense of obligation, Sphinx takes it upon herself to provide a sense of happiness during Cadence's last days. But now with a terminal illness, he has been given the freedom to do and say what he pleases and his mother and Sphinx only enable his behavior. His estranged friend actually begins to believe that she can make a difference, that Cadence actually wants her there, but he only wants to continue to hurt her. And it's not only Sphinx that suffers the consequences. Cadence's character was everything I'd expect him to be, sinister, malicious and cold. His character is unlike any of seen in young adult, and although I was horrified, I couldn't put it down. It was akin to watching a horror, covering your eyes, bracing yourself and reading on the edge of your seat.
But I couldn't enjoy it. It wasn't badly written, but the storyline was just so incredibly disturbing that I really didn't know what the overall message of Breaking Butterflies was. That parents can be irresponsible and let you down? That as long as you're dying, you can mentally and physically abuse others? That it's alright to find yourself attracted to a sociopath, because the passion in which he inflicts the pain captivates you? Definitely one for mature young adult reader that enjoys dark psychologically disturbing storylines. The cover is lovely though.
September 21, 2014
I'm really not understanding why so many people have given this a one star rating.
Some cited that Cadence was too textbook SEMI SPOILER sociopath. Well...as do most things being a sociopath comes with signs and symptoms...kind of have to have all or half to be diagnosed... so yeah... he kind of would have to be textbook...
Some hated Sphinx and her decisions. While I find her weak in the area of being a pushover she often explains herself in the book. She doesn't want to disappoint her mother and her old best friend is dying and since Sphinx has emotions she feels bad even if the dudes a dick. That's understandable as well.
I loved this book and finished it in one setting. Nothing like the typical YA love triangles and forgotten plots.
It is different and while a strange topic it's refreshing to read after everything else.
Side note this was written on a phone so my spoiler stuff is written before hand instead of tagged or highlighted. Sorry!
Some cited that Cadence was too textbook SEMI SPOILER sociopath. Well...as do most things being a sociopath comes with signs and symptoms...kind of have to have all or half to be diagnosed... so yeah... he kind of would have to be textbook...
Some hated Sphinx and her decisions. While I find her weak in the area of being a pushover she often explains herself in the book. She doesn't want to disappoint her mother and her old best friend is dying and since Sphinx has emotions she feels bad even if the dudes a dick. That's understandable as well.
I loved this book and finished it in one setting. Nothing like the typical YA love triangles and forgotten plots.
It is different and while a strange topic it's refreshing to read after everything else.
Side note this was written on a phone so my spoiler stuff is written before hand instead of tagged or highlighted. Sorry!
July 24, 2016
Why did I read it? Because the title was so mysterious and the cover so beautiful and promised me of a great story. The content totally shattered the promise in millions of tiny pieces. Disappointed.
I gave it two stars just because of the beautiful writing style. What made me give it only two stars? The book's bad story plot. OK, Let's swim in the details now.
What was good?
The writing style, it was so powerful,so addictive and kind of sucked me right in. But,the whole beauty went down in drain with the miserable plot.
I don't really have more good things to say about it. To the more fun part, what I didn't like:
Miserable plot story, well this is a story about a girl called Sphinx, yes you read it right, "Sphinx", not the half-human, half-lion mythical creature; and a boy called Cadence. They were born to women who were earlier best friends, and made a pact years ago, promising each other that both their children will marry each other in future. But, promises like that are very dangerous.
Cadence can be compared to a psych who finds pleasure in harming others and Sphinx can be concluded as a crazier psych who "loves"-if that is the right word, Cadence, even when he tries to harm her. In the whole book, Cadence did not even do one nice thing with Sphinx, not even a perfect smile was granted to her. One word for Cadence: Irritating and one word for Sphinx:"Nuts". I mean if a person tries to harm you, cuts your face with a knife, and does all does cruel things to you, would you go around making yourself believe that you love that person. Of course not! You don't want to invite your death. Well, this Sphinx-girl was so crazy that after all the things Cadence did to her, she tried to suicide. Not because she wanted to run away from Cadence but to be WITH him after death, as Cadence dies of a terminal-illness.
I guess after-death thing would have been sweet,only if they both really loved each other. But in this, it was just simple stupidity, nothing else, just stupid. I feel like Cadence is a bad master and Sphinx is a loyal pet. That's the relationship between them.
Both of their mothers were so engrossed in keeping their friendship strong and their promise unbroken that they didn't notice that one of them was trying to kill the other off, and the other one was ready to die for their sake. Not Ideal mothers, are they?
I grew so angry and frustrated over the characters, all of them. They were just so, so... ugh a can't find a right word. Wait, let me think, they were complete idiots who didn't know how to stop shittting around and make each other's life miserable. I didn't like any of them. Not even a single one.
I don't even feel like talking much about it, which in my case, is quite unusual as I LOVE to talk about books, god or bad. Maybe the writer was unable to sum a nice plot, and all the readers found were pieces written about cruel scenes in good writing. I just couldn't extract the message out of it. Maybe it had some dark mysterious stories(which I love) but it was only a dark story, even the most strongest of writing style couldn't save it from going down the pitch.
I gave it two stars just because of the beautiful writing style. What made me give it only two stars? The book's bad story plot. OK, Let's swim in the details now.
What was good?
The writing style, it was so powerful,so addictive and kind of sucked me right in. But,the whole beauty went down in drain with the miserable plot.
I don't really have more good things to say about it. To the more fun part, what I didn't like:
Miserable plot story, well this is a story about a girl called Sphinx, yes you read it right, "Sphinx", not the half-human, half-lion mythical creature; and a boy called Cadence. They were born to women who were earlier best friends, and made a pact years ago, promising each other that both their children will marry each other in future. But, promises like that are very dangerous.
Cadence can be compared to a psych who finds pleasure in harming others and Sphinx can be concluded as a crazier psych who "loves"-if that is the right word, Cadence, even when he tries to harm her. In the whole book, Cadence did not even do one nice thing with Sphinx, not even a perfect smile was granted to her. One word for Cadence: Irritating and one word for Sphinx:"Nuts". I mean if a person tries to harm you, cuts your face with a knife, and does all does cruel things to you, would you go around making yourself believe that you love that person. Of course not! You don't want to invite your death. Well, this Sphinx-girl was so crazy that after all the things Cadence did to her, she tried to suicide. Not because she wanted to run away from Cadence but to be WITH him after death, as Cadence dies of a terminal-illness.
I guess after-death thing would have been sweet,only if they both really loved each other. But in this, it was just simple stupidity, nothing else, just stupid. I feel like Cadence is a bad master and Sphinx is a loyal pet. That's the relationship between them.
Both of their mothers were so engrossed in keeping their friendship strong and their promise unbroken that they didn't notice that one of them was trying to kill the other off, and the other one was ready to die for their sake. Not Ideal mothers, are they?
I grew so angry and frustrated over the characters, all of them. They were just so, so... ugh a can't find a right word. Wait, let me think, they were complete idiots who didn't know how to stop shittting around and make each other's life miserable. I didn't like any of them. Not even a single one.
I don't even feel like talking much about it, which in my case, is quite unusual as I LOVE to talk about books, god or bad. Maybe the writer was unable to sum a nice plot, and all the readers found were pieces written about cruel scenes in good writing. I just couldn't extract the message out of it. Maybe it had some dark mysterious stories(which I love) but it was only a dark story, even the most strongest of writing style couldn't save it from going down the pitch.
November 30, 2023
There are quite a few books which come to you for the very first pages; Breaking Butterflies is one of them, as the first meeting between the two little girls is absolutely delicious. So we are starting high, continue in the same manner, up to some point in which the reader begins to feel uncomfortable for the things happening.
The main guilt is on Cadence, an egocentric spoiled little piece of garbage. His illness is nobody's fault, so his rudeness and lack of manners cannot be excused, not to mention the pure kindness he's surrounded.
But the girl makes all the money. Sweet, serious, sensible, glad to see her escaping the bad spell...
The main guilt is on Cadence, an egocentric spoiled little piece of garbage. His illness is nobody's fault, so his rudeness and lack of manners cannot be excused, not to mention the pure kindness he's surrounded.
But the girl makes all the money. Sweet, serious, sensible, glad to see her escaping the bad spell...
June 4, 2014
Originally posted on Once Upon a Bookcase.
WARNING! I cannot review this book in the way I want to for Mental Health Awareness Month without spoiling it. Read no further if you don't want it spoilt for you.
Reading the above synopsis, who could fail to be intrigued by this book? Two teens drawn together, one of whom can't feel! Surely the makings of an amazing and really interesting story, right? Sadly, I'm afraid not - at least not for me.
When they were seven years old, Sphinx and Cadence's mothers made a plan; they would each have one child, one a boy and one a girl, and they would grow up and get married. The plan is something that Sphinx has held on to, the way her life was supposed to go. But when Cadence falls ill, the plan is broken. Cadence needs Sphinx more than ever, and she's determined to do what she can for him, whatever it takes, even if it hurts her. With Cadence's volatile behaviour, that's more than likely.
This is going to be a really difficult book to review, because I didn't enjoy it. At all. I can't work out if the plot was good and just didn't work because of the author's writing ability, or if the story itself was also not very great. If it wasn't for the fact that I want to read books covering a variety of mental health issues for MHAM, I would have put this book down a fifth of the way in.
Let me talk about the writing before I go into the story in too much detail. I'm no editor, so I could be wrong, but this felt really badly written to me. The style felt amateurish to me; the fact that Sphinx thought Cadence shone brightly was constantly repeated; his light, the fire in his eyes, etc, etc. If there was any point she could talk about his light, Anjelais would have her do so. I got tired of hearing about it. When reading about authors editing on their websites or Twitter, they mention cutting out scenes that don't add to the story, that don't need to be there. There were so many! Like the one with the kid who's mum is helping him wash his hands in the toilet? There was no reason for them! And ideas that were repeated over and over, like Sphinx was only just thinking of it for the first time. And Sphinx's inability to explain things to her mother. Trying to explain why she wanted to extend her trip in England visiting Cadence made her sound like a child rather than a 16-year-old, pretty much simply, "Please, mum, I have to!" But why? As the reader, we know, but if she's trying to convince her mother to let her with no why, no mother is going to let her. Except for hers. And there was far too much emphasis on this childhood plan of their mothers', as if it was actually something important. It was just such a hard, hard slog to get through, and it's only 257 pages long.
I do think it's because of this that I didn't like the plot. I couldn't warm to Sphinx; she was unbearably annoying and immature, and simply not believable for me. She made ridiculous decisions, and her reasons for them were just so wrong, I was thinking, "Can you hear yourself?! Are you serious?!" I didn't like her, I didn't care about her, and I wasn't too bothered about what happened to her. Which isn't great, considering we're supposed to be horrified by Cadence's behaviour.
So, Candence. He has been diagnosed as a sociopath, and his actions are unbelievable. They're shocking and atrocious, but I don't think his story was written well enough. Although Sphinx sympathised with him, I found him really unsympathetic, which I don't think is great when presented with a character who has mental health issues. I don't know enough about sociopaths (or Anti-Social Personality Disorders, which a sociopath has, if my research is correct) to know if Cadence is a fair representation. I'd like to think not, because he's written as a monster.
Dictionary.com defines a sociopath as "a person with a psychopathic personality whose behavior is antisocial, often criminal, and who lacks a sense of moral responsibility or social conscience." Where that is mostly true for Cadence, that's not what's focused on in regards to his mental illness, what's focused on is his inability to feel; pleasure, sadness, any strong, passionate emotion that isn't anger. This side of sociopathy is discussed further on HealthGuidance.org. He gauges how he's supposed to react by watching Sphinx, because he doesn't feel these emotions himself. He's constantly trying to feel something, and can't. So he hurts, bullies, threatens people. Reading what's said on HealthGuidance.org, I feel it's possible for me to be more sympathetic to me as a reader Cadence if the story was written differently. Perhaps I'm wrong, but considering Cadence has a mental illness, the way he is portrayed in this story made me feel really uncomfortable, because I hated him. That doesn't sit right with me. Perhaps it's Sphinx as a flawed narrator, perhaps it's how Anjelais wrote the story, I didn't understand Cadence enough to feel anything other than complete abhorrence for him. And that really isn't right. I suppose it didn't help that there was an attitude of, "Oh, he has a mental illness and he's ill, so we'll tiptoe around him and let him get away with whatever he wants." I disagreed with that completely.
I really want to read more books with sociopaths in them, simply because I think this book may have done them a disservice. I need to read a sympathetic book on sociopaths. I need to fix this reaction. I very much doubt I'll be reading anything by Anjelais again.
But maybe you will have a different reaction to Breaking Butterflies; do read some other reviews before deciding not to read it. Don't base your decision on my review alone.
Thank you to Chicken House for the review copy.
WARNING! I cannot review this book in the way I want to for Mental Health Awareness Month without spoiling it. Read no further if you don't want it spoilt for you.
Reading the above synopsis, who could fail to be intrigued by this book? Two teens drawn together, one of whom can't feel! Surely the makings of an amazing and really interesting story, right? Sadly, I'm afraid not - at least not for me.
When they were seven years old, Sphinx and Cadence's mothers made a plan; they would each have one child, one a boy and one a girl, and they would grow up and get married. The plan is something that Sphinx has held on to, the way her life was supposed to go. But when Cadence falls ill, the plan is broken. Cadence needs Sphinx more than ever, and she's determined to do what she can for him, whatever it takes, even if it hurts her. With Cadence's volatile behaviour, that's more than likely.
This is going to be a really difficult book to review, because I didn't enjoy it. At all. I can't work out if the plot was good and just didn't work because of the author's writing ability, or if the story itself was also not very great. If it wasn't for the fact that I want to read books covering a variety of mental health issues for MHAM, I would have put this book down a fifth of the way in.
Let me talk about the writing before I go into the story in too much detail. I'm no editor, so I could be wrong, but this felt really badly written to me. The style felt amateurish to me; the fact that Sphinx thought Cadence shone brightly was constantly repeated; his light, the fire in his eyes, etc, etc. If there was any point she could talk about his light, Anjelais would have her do so. I got tired of hearing about it. When reading about authors editing on their websites or Twitter, they mention cutting out scenes that don't add to the story, that don't need to be there. There were so many! Like the one with the kid who's mum is helping him wash his hands in the toilet? There was no reason for them! And ideas that were repeated over and over, like Sphinx was only just thinking of it for the first time. And Sphinx's inability to explain things to her mother. Trying to explain why she wanted to extend her trip in England visiting Cadence made her sound like a child rather than a 16-year-old, pretty much simply, "Please, mum, I have to!" But why? As the reader, we know, but if she's trying to convince her mother to let her with no why, no mother is going to let her. Except for hers. And there was far too much emphasis on this childhood plan of their mothers', as if it was actually something important. It was just such a hard, hard slog to get through, and it's only 257 pages long.
I do think it's because of this that I didn't like the plot. I couldn't warm to Sphinx; she was unbearably annoying and immature, and simply not believable for me. She made ridiculous decisions, and her reasons for them were just so wrong, I was thinking, "Can you hear yourself?! Are you serious?!" I didn't like her, I didn't care about her, and I wasn't too bothered about what happened to her. Which isn't great, considering we're supposed to be horrified by Cadence's behaviour.
So, Candence. He has been diagnosed as a sociopath, and his actions are unbelievable. They're shocking and atrocious, but I don't think his story was written well enough. Although Sphinx sympathised with him, I found him really unsympathetic, which I don't think is great when presented with a character who has mental health issues. I don't know enough about sociopaths (or Anti-Social Personality Disorders, which a sociopath has, if my research is correct) to know if Cadence is a fair representation. I'd like to think not, because he's written as a monster.
Dictionary.com defines a sociopath as "a person with a psychopathic personality whose behavior is antisocial, often criminal, and who lacks a sense of moral responsibility or social conscience." Where that is mostly true for Cadence, that's not what's focused on in regards to his mental illness, what's focused on is his inability to feel; pleasure, sadness, any strong, passionate emotion that isn't anger. This side of sociopathy is discussed further on HealthGuidance.org. He gauges how he's supposed to react by watching Sphinx, because he doesn't feel these emotions himself. He's constantly trying to feel something, and can't. So he hurts, bullies, threatens people. Reading what's said on HealthGuidance.org, I feel it's possible for me to be more sympathetic to me as a reader Cadence if the story was written differently. Perhaps I'm wrong, but considering Cadence has a mental illness, the way he is portrayed in this story made me feel really uncomfortable, because I hated him. That doesn't sit right with me. Perhaps it's Sphinx as a flawed narrator, perhaps it's how Anjelais wrote the story, I didn't understand Cadence enough to feel anything other than complete abhorrence for him. And that really isn't right. I suppose it didn't help that there was an attitude of, "Oh, he has a mental illness and he's ill, so we'll tiptoe around him and let him get away with whatever he wants." I disagreed with that completely.
I really want to read more books with sociopaths in them, simply because I think this book may have done them a disservice. I need to read a sympathetic book on sociopaths. I need to fix this reaction. I very much doubt I'll be reading anything by Anjelais again.
But maybe you will have a different reaction to Breaking Butterflies; do read some other reviews before deciding not to read it. Don't base your decision on my review alone.
Thank you to Chicken House for the review copy.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 5, 2014
I will say before I begin that I may not be the best audience for this book. I have degrees in psychology so the subject matter involving the sociopathic Cadence did nothing but annoy my sensibilities. I have to say with regret that I did not like or enjoy this book. Sphynx and Cadence are the children of life-long friends, their mothers having been best friends since they were seven; so much so that at seven they decided on their "life plan". This plan involved their children one day being best friends and then getting married and having children of their own. They didn't plan on Cadence being a monster. When the children were ten Cadence cuts open Sphynx's face, leaving a scar and causing his mother to take them both to live in England, away from Sphynx and her mother. When the kids were even younger, Cadence catches a butterfly and crushes it emotionlessly in his hand, only crying when he saw what the appropriate reaction was. Given my education (and people without it would probably know too) I immediately knew that the character was a sociopath. I admit I thought the story was about something else; namely a teenage couple who had an abusive relationship. This was a whole lot worse. Cadence is diagnosed with leukemia when they are 16 and asks that Sphynx come to England to see him, and for some unknown reason she agrees. Not only that she decides she has to stay until the end, even though he is nothing but cruel and terrible and on several occasions physically attacks her. She learns that he was diagnosed as a sociopath and for another unknown reason feels sorry for him. She thinks of all the emotions he can't feel and somehow thinks this is something to empathize with. Perhaps this is because the author was very young, but sociopaths cannot miss what they never had. The author paints the character of Cadence as someone to sympathize with, but that is akin to feeling sorry for Ted Bundy because he killed all those people. The final straw for me was that for quite some time Sphynx debates killing herself to die with him simply because he tells her they are meant to die together. This is ridiculous and made me really dislike her character. Then she tells him she loves him, because, presumably, she heard a line in a song that said "love means watching someone die". There was not even one aspect of Cadence worth such emotion, and if someone had such emotion that person would also be mentally ill. So while I very rarely give very bad reviews, this book unfortunately warranted one. The writing was actually very good, it was just the plot, if for no other reason than it must have been very poorly researched. And slightly dangerous. Every day a teenage girl decides she can fix the monster she loves and trust me it never goes well. They aren't all sociopaths of course, but to give the emotionless depth they don't possess is not something any author should do when writing for a teenage audience.
March 27, 2015
This book is amazingly hectic! It is literally worth the tears I shed and and the time I spent up late at night when I was supposed to be asleep for school. I'm wrecked and heartbroken right now and I will never get over the ending. Totally deserves 5 stars!
February 8, 2017
I'm not sure I have the words for this one
It's like watching a car accident happen in front of your eyes. You want to look away but can't because you need to know what happens next.
Hands down the creepiest relationship I've ever read about in a YA novel
It's like watching a car accident happen in front of your eyes. You want to look away but can't because you need to know what happens next.
Hands down the creepiest relationship I've ever read about in a YA novel
July 17, 2014
This review appears on Happy Indulgence. Check it out for more reviews!
Reading Breaking Butterflies is akin to sinking into a deep web of intrigue, not being able to tear yourself away but knowing the end result is going to be disastrous. It is an interesting and horrific representation of two children who are inexplicably drawn to each other, one a sociopath, and one an empathetic girl with no self-preservation skills whatsoever.
Two little girls make a lifelong pact that they will be best friends, pursue particular careers, and have two children who will fall in love and get married. This pact will be a frustrating, dogged point of reference throughout the book, as these two girls are now grown adults who are the mothers of Sphinx and Cadence.
Cadence has a damaged mind and body, who has been diagnosed as a sociopath and has leukemia. He is terrifying, cold and heartless with an unusual charisma about him, and has suckered Sphinx into his clutches who can’t seem to get away from him. He uses her as a a point of reference for how he should act when it comes to certain situations, like crushing a butterfly between his hands and subsequently crying afterwards. Witnessing Cadence’s complete disconnection to people’s feelings and what is right and wrong was both horrifying and heartbreaking, as he struggles to just feel which seems to come so easily to the people around him.
Throughout the book, Cadence will spiral into his own demise, and Sphinx will be dragged down with him. Sphinx really annoyed me at her character, as she continually makes stupid decisions throughout the book. As a child, Cadence slices her cheek with a knife, and she’s scarred for life. But when Cadence is diagnosed with leukemia, does she stay away? Nope, she goes and sees him one last time and stays with him, despite her parents’ unease, Cadence’s threats, and her own intuition. She does everything Cadence tells her to, and even considers when he asks her to kill herself.
Some other conveniences during the book just made me shake my head in disbelief.
- Sphinx’s dad was really upset when she got hurt the first time when they were a kid, so why would he let her go to him again when they became older? Why would he let her stay there by herself? This is where the stupid pact is brought up to manipulate her mother into letting her stay, come on ladies, it’s time to let it go.
- When Cadence is diagnosed with leukemia, his mother Leigh does not put him through chemotherapy. Because she wanted to make the limited time he had to live as normal as possible. WHO DOES THIS?
- Cadence and Sphinx fall through a glass table and hurt themselves badly, where Cadence has a head injury. They don’t call the ambulance because Sphinx doesn’t want her parents to know. So instead, they get into the car and drive to the hospital. Again, WHO DOES THIS? Leigh just sounds like a complete failure of a mother.
- Sphinx just can’t bring herself to tell Leigh, or her own parents about Cadence’s disturbing and threatening behaviour. Why? Because she’s stupid.
There is no other book I’ve encountered that explores a teenage sociopath as deeply as Breaking Butterflies does, and it was utterly captivating and horrific. Written in a beautiful manner, I can’t believe the author was only 18 when she wrote this. Unfortunately, the illogical conveniences had me make me suspend my disbelief during several moments during the book, making it seem more unrealistic than it needed to be. If you enjoy psychological thrillers though, I recommend you give this a go.
Reading Breaking Butterflies is akin to sinking into a deep web of intrigue, not being able to tear yourself away but knowing the end result is going to be disastrous. It is an interesting and horrific representation of two children who are inexplicably drawn to each other, one a sociopath, and one an empathetic girl with no self-preservation skills whatsoever.
Two little girls make a lifelong pact that they will be best friends, pursue particular careers, and have two children who will fall in love and get married. This pact will be a frustrating, dogged point of reference throughout the book, as these two girls are now grown adults who are the mothers of Sphinx and Cadence.
Cadence has a damaged mind and body, who has been diagnosed as a sociopath and has leukemia. He is terrifying, cold and heartless with an unusual charisma about him, and has suckered Sphinx into his clutches who can’t seem to get away from him. He uses her as a a point of reference for how he should act when it comes to certain situations, like crushing a butterfly between his hands and subsequently crying afterwards. Witnessing Cadence’s complete disconnection to people’s feelings and what is right and wrong was both horrifying and heartbreaking, as he struggles to just feel which seems to come so easily to the people around him.
Throughout the book, Cadence will spiral into his own demise, and Sphinx will be dragged down with him. Sphinx really annoyed me at her character, as she continually makes stupid decisions throughout the book. As a child, Cadence slices her cheek with a knife, and she’s scarred for life. But when Cadence is diagnosed with leukemia, does she stay away? Nope, she goes and sees him one last time and stays with him, despite her parents’ unease, Cadence’s threats, and her own intuition. She does everything Cadence tells her to, and even considers when he asks her to kill herself.
Some other conveniences during the book just made me shake my head in disbelief.
- Sphinx’s dad was really upset when she got hurt the first time when they were a kid, so why would he let her go to him again when they became older? Why would he let her stay there by herself? This is where the stupid pact is brought up to manipulate her mother into letting her stay, come on ladies, it’s time to let it go.
- When Cadence is diagnosed with leukemia, his mother Leigh does not put him through chemotherapy. Because she wanted to make the limited time he had to live as normal as possible. WHO DOES THIS?
- Cadence and Sphinx fall through a glass table and hurt themselves badly, where Cadence has a head injury. They don’t call the ambulance because Sphinx doesn’t want her parents to know. So instead, they get into the car and drive to the hospital. Again, WHO DOES THIS? Leigh just sounds like a complete failure of a mother.
- Sphinx just can’t bring herself to tell Leigh, or her own parents about Cadence’s disturbing and threatening behaviour. Why? Because she’s stupid.
There is no other book I’ve encountered that explores a teenage sociopath as deeply as Breaking Butterflies does, and it was utterly captivating and horrific. Written in a beautiful manner, I can’t believe the author was only 18 when she wrote this. Unfortunately, the illogical conveniences had me make me suspend my disbelief during several moments during the book, making it seem more unrealistic than it needed to be. If you enjoy psychological thrillers though, I recommend you give this a go.
October 8, 2014
This is one of those books that I honestly don’t know where to even start to tell you about. When I started it, I didn’t read the blurb inside so I had no idea what I was getting into. This might be a little on the long side, and a little ranty, and with spoiler so I thought I would warn you. The writing was good and I liked this part of the book, and the book is a fast read, it just wan’t for me.
This is a story that follows a young girl and a young guy, their mothers growing up were best friends. They made this strange plan that when they grew up, their children would grow up and end up together. When Sphinxie and Cadence were little they were close just like the mothers hoped, but it didn’t take long to figure out that there was something wrong with Cadence. His irradic behavior and temper set in motion some events that no parent can ignore. And the mothers somewhat grew apart, and so did Sphinxie and Cadence. It is when Cadence become ill that Sphinxie ends together with him again.
Character wise, I will start with Sphinxie. She was naive, and some decisions that I couldn’t understand. Why put yourself through someone verbally or emotionally abusing you, but she does. I thought to myself, can she really not see what it going on, and I spent most of the time frustrated with her. Cadence was everything that I know about what a sociopath is. He’s manipulative and his mood swings were frightening. Even at the end, I still had not found one redeemming quality in him. Sphinxie’s mother wasn’t much better, and against her father wishes she still allows her contact with Cadence. Cadence’s mother accepted his behavior as everything normality. It was hard to find a reason to connect with any of them.
The plot itself it where this lost me even more. There were so many things that happened that just wasn’t right but at the same time it was addictive. Anyway, both Sphinxie and Cadence’s mother had a wonderful friendship growing up, and it wasn’t any wonder that they wanted to still be friends when they grew up, and especially their children being friends. Cadence got mad at Sphinxie and took a knife and cut her, in her face, then he killed a bird and never felt a thing, no sympathy, regret or emotion. Excuses were made and life went on though. Cadence was diagnosed with being a sociopath when he got a little older, but when he became ill, Sphinxie and her Mom went to visit and Sphinxie felt this draw to him, which was something I never understood. He treated her horribly, he’d yell, throw things, shut himself in his room, you name it, he did it. I think I kept reading just to see if anything ever changed, maybe as he got sicker he would be different. Sadly, I didn’t get anything more than what I did the entire book.
Once I finished reading, I still wasn’t sure what I thought about this. It is a book that sticks with you, just in the way I would have liked it to. I will say, that I recommend checking out some other reviews before writing this one off, you might have a different reaction to this than I did.
For more review, check out Visit Book Live Forever
April 6, 2014
I didn’t totally know what to expect from Breaking Butterflies by M. Angelais before I headed in. I mean, the blurb I happened to read for it was pretty vague—not that I pay much attention to them anyway—and the concept behind the cover isn’t truly clear until one gets to know the story/characters a little. So I went in with a broad mind and hoped for the best.
Well, turned out, the best is very nearly what I got.
In Breaking Butterflies, we meet Sphinx, a young teenager, as impressionable as her mother with a friendship she can’t say no to, and a connection she *almost* can’t control.
And the other half of this friendship? Cadence. Indifference personified to Sphinx’s eagerness. The moon to Sphinx’s moth tendencies. And quite possibly one of the creepiest characters I’ve ever seen written so subtly—so subtly, in fact, that even the reader can be left wondering if their doubts about him are imagined.
Enhancing this subtle writing is the voice of Sphinx as narrator. Because the detached way in which she relays the story to the reader is almost masterful. Almost as though looking back in a whimsical sense, a hint of disbelief in her tone at what, exactly, she endured, how they even got there, and what the outcome could have been had she not found the strength within herself to make it different. Also, I have great appreciation for this detachment extending to her recounts of Cadence’s behaviour. Whilst her actual descriptions of the character himself were glowing and vibrant and made you believe the yearning he instilled inside her, made him believable as a pariah, even, the clinical descriptions of everything that occurred between them gave the impression of mental and emotion scarring—the kind that resides within a person’s subconscious as a permanent tenant. It makes such a refreshing change for the ‘damaged’ character to not be romanticised, and Sphinx’s storytelling ensured a disconnection from him for the reader—rightly so—which helped take the story to a whole other level. And, although Sphinx’s voice sounded older in wisdom, it never once strayed from her age, giving such an authentic tone to the overall telling of the story and heightening the believability of what most would find incredible unless they have experienced such a relationship themselves.
I don’t really want to go into too much depth for fear of ruining the story for others. But this tale is about so much more than the blurb I read suggests. It tells tales of how parent actions can affect the offspring, of childhood friendships built on need, of bonds and family and sickness—both mental and physical—and strengths and weaknesses, of manipulation, and (perhaps the strongest elemental of all in here) how history certainly can have a habit of repeating itself—in a terrifying way.
I saw this in another review: “It’s like watching a car accident happen in front of your eyes. You want to look away but can’t because you need to know what happens next.” <
So … love dark and twisted and foreboding tales that are so subtly creepy you’re not even aware that it’s sending shivers down your spine until it’s too late and you’re hooked? Then, you definitely want to check out Breaking Butterflies, for sure.
Well, turned out, the best is very nearly what I got.
In Breaking Butterflies, we meet Sphinx, a young teenager, as impressionable as her mother with a friendship she can’t say no to, and a connection she *almost* can’t control.
And the other half of this friendship? Cadence. Indifference personified to Sphinx’s eagerness. The moon to Sphinx’s moth tendencies. And quite possibly one of the creepiest characters I’ve ever seen written so subtly—so subtly, in fact, that even the reader can be left wondering if their doubts about him are imagined.
Enhancing this subtle writing is the voice of Sphinx as narrator. Because the detached way in which she relays the story to the reader is almost masterful. Almost as though looking back in a whimsical sense, a hint of disbelief in her tone at what, exactly, she endured, how they even got there, and what the outcome could have been had she not found the strength within herself to make it different. Also, I have great appreciation for this detachment extending to her recounts of Cadence’s behaviour. Whilst her actual descriptions of the character himself were glowing and vibrant and made you believe the yearning he instilled inside her, made him believable as a pariah, even, the clinical descriptions of everything that occurred between them gave the impression of mental and emotion scarring—the kind that resides within a person’s subconscious as a permanent tenant. It makes such a refreshing change for the ‘damaged’ character to not be romanticised, and Sphinx’s storytelling ensured a disconnection from him for the reader—rightly so—which helped take the story to a whole other level. And, although Sphinx’s voice sounded older in wisdom, it never once strayed from her age, giving such an authentic tone to the overall telling of the story and heightening the believability of what most would find incredible unless they have experienced such a relationship themselves.
I don’t really want to go into too much depth for fear of ruining the story for others. But this tale is about so much more than the blurb I read suggests. It tells tales of how parent actions can affect the offspring, of childhood friendships built on need, of bonds and family and sickness—both mental and physical—and strengths and weaknesses, of manipulation, and (perhaps the strongest elemental of all in here) how history certainly can have a habit of repeating itself—in a terrifying way.
I saw this in another review: “It’s like watching a car accident happen in front of your eyes. You want to look away but can’t because you need to know what happens next.” <
So … love dark and twisted and foreboding tales that are so subtly creepy you’re not even aware that it’s sending shivers down your spine until it’s too late and you’re hooked? Then, you definitely want to check out Breaking Butterflies, for sure.
May 30, 2015
I really really didn't like this book. Every time I read it I wanted to burn it or shred it.
June 8, 2015
First Thoughts: I've seen this statement alot for this novel, "it has an abusive relationship and it romanticizes abuse."
If you're a sociopath, it doesn't give you a free pass to hurt and abuse others. From what I have studied from psychology over the years, I just don't blame them when they do because they have an illness. Their brains aren't the same like the rest of us. They're mentally ill, they lack a moral conscious, and they feel no remorse or empathy. I don't believe you can compare this relationship to other abusive relationships, they're not exactly the same. Sociopaths aren't just mental illness free reckless men with anger management issues. They're more dangerous. Sociopaths are born, not created overtime like some reckless men. I wouldn't call this an abusive relationship but a more intense, destructive relationship. It can destroy both partners. As for romanticizing abuse, that wasn't what the author was doing. He was trying to portray a different relationship that cannot be helped.
Characterization & Romance: Cadence is manipulative, sometimes emotionless, he uses Sphinx and crushes her like a butterfly. Cadence might seem heartless, but Sphinx still has emotions that make her stay. If you loved someone so much, wouldn't you want to be there for them in their last moments? I understand Cadence is not your average love interest, I would think twice to be around him. Although, I wouldn't abandon my son if he was mentally sick even if he treated me like crap, so why would you abandon a partner you love? The heroine knows this is wrong, Cadence is not normal, but it's her choice to still stay with him. I don't think it's because she loves him, I think it's because he needs her even though he cannot say it. I don't think this is a love story or a romance book, it's more psychological. There is hardly any romance in this novel though, the feelings are there but there isn't any mushy gushy stuff. They don't even kiss okay?
There are a couple of errors about sociopaths in the book, it's probably because the author wrote this book at a such a young age, he was only eighteen. Sphinx could be considered brave for even dealing with Cadence or incredibly stupid for wanting to be around someone insane. Sphinx knows she doesn't deserve to be treated as a doormat, but I realized she's just trying to be there for someone else no matter how hard that can be. I wouldn't exactly judge her for that though. It's easier to make up your mind about a human being who doesn't have an mental illness and they hurt you anyway, you can leave them - but I would find it quite difficult to leave someone who has an mental illness. I wouldn't call Sphinx a doormat but rather helpless.
Plot: The actual plot was fascinating, this novel had many twists and turns down the way. The author presented a sick, destructive relationship that isn't too common in Young Adult, I found that really unique and different. I found it realistic for the most part, it would have baffled my mind if Cadence somehow changed because of love but he doesn't. He remains true to himself. I didn't agree with all he did, but I did empathized with him. One thing that bothers me about this book is the parents. Leigh and Sarah, I would never let a sociopath guy near my child and vice versa. I empathize yes, but they're still dangerous. The book is horrifying and intense, although I would have liked to see more darkness in this novel, it could have been five butterflies for me if it was more developed. This book should have been made more for adults and not teenagers because it can be taken the wrong way. Overall, I won't forget a book like this again, it does make an impact on the reader. The writing is fantastic, it's easy to get lost into a novel like this. It can be hard to read Breaking Butterflies though, it's not a book for everyone but I found it a unique novel. I would have liked to know Cadence's POV as well. This is a twisted book, you don't want to keep reading, but at the same time you cannot wait for what happens next. I would rate it 4 butterflies.
Source: Review Copy was sent via Scholastic.
If you're a sociopath, it doesn't give you a free pass to hurt and abuse others. From what I have studied from psychology over the years, I just don't blame them when they do because they have an illness. Their brains aren't the same like the rest of us. They're mentally ill, they lack a moral conscious, and they feel no remorse or empathy. I don't believe you can compare this relationship to other abusive relationships, they're not exactly the same. Sociopaths aren't just mental illness free reckless men with anger management issues. They're more dangerous. Sociopaths are born, not created overtime like some reckless men. I wouldn't call this an abusive relationship but a more intense, destructive relationship. It can destroy both partners. As for romanticizing abuse, that wasn't what the author was doing. He was trying to portray a different relationship that cannot be helped.
Characterization & Romance: Cadence is manipulative, sometimes emotionless, he uses Sphinx and crushes her like a butterfly. Cadence might seem heartless, but Sphinx still has emotions that make her stay. If you loved someone so much, wouldn't you want to be there for them in their last moments? I understand Cadence is not your average love interest, I would think twice to be around him. Although, I wouldn't abandon my son if he was mentally sick even if he treated me like crap, so why would you abandon a partner you love? The heroine knows this is wrong, Cadence is not normal, but it's her choice to still stay with him. I don't think it's because she loves him, I think it's because he needs her even though he cannot say it. I don't think this is a love story or a romance book, it's more psychological. There is hardly any romance in this novel though, the feelings are there but there isn't any mushy gushy stuff. They don't even kiss okay?
There are a couple of errors about sociopaths in the book, it's probably because the author wrote this book at a such a young age, he was only eighteen. Sphinx could be considered brave for even dealing with Cadence or incredibly stupid for wanting to be around someone insane. Sphinx knows she doesn't deserve to be treated as a doormat, but I realized she's just trying to be there for someone else no matter how hard that can be. I wouldn't exactly judge her for that though. It's easier to make up your mind about a human being who doesn't have an mental illness and they hurt you anyway, you can leave them - but I would find it quite difficult to leave someone who has an mental illness. I wouldn't call Sphinx a doormat but rather helpless.
Plot: The actual plot was fascinating, this novel had many twists and turns down the way. The author presented a sick, destructive relationship that isn't too common in Young Adult, I found that really unique and different. I found it realistic for the most part, it would have baffled my mind if Cadence somehow changed because of love but he doesn't. He remains true to himself. I didn't agree with all he did, but I did empathized with him. One thing that bothers me about this book is the parents. Leigh and Sarah, I would never let a sociopath guy near my child and vice versa. I empathize yes, but they're still dangerous. The book is horrifying and intense, although I would have liked to see more darkness in this novel, it could have been five butterflies for me if it was more developed. This book should have been made more for adults and not teenagers because it can be taken the wrong way. Overall, I won't forget a book like this again, it does make an impact on the reader. The writing is fantastic, it's easy to get lost into a novel like this. It can be hard to read Breaking Butterflies though, it's not a book for everyone but I found it a unique novel. I would have liked to know Cadence's POV as well. This is a twisted book, you don't want to keep reading, but at the same time you cannot wait for what happens next. I would rate it 4 butterflies.
Source: Review Copy was sent via Scholastic.
August 1, 2014
I don’t what to feel about this book, well first of it’s a real page turner. It’s a good book actually it’s a little scary and heart breaking. The story is about 2 mothers who made a promise to each other when they were still young, that when they get older their kids will marry each other. So eventually that happened Sphinx and Cadence was born. They grew up side by side and throughout their childhood there is something obviously wrong with cadence like when the time when Cadence put a knife on Sphinxie’s face which left a mark. After that incident they grew up apart, well Cadence’s family moved to England and then he was diagnosed with Leukemia and that he was dying. And lastly he was also diagnosed as a sociopath.
The book was beautifully written, it captures the personality of someone who is considered as a sociopath. Sphinx knew that being near Cadence is dangerous but she decided to stay with him till the end, because she thinks that only her can and will ever understand cadence. The part that I liked most was the emotion that Cadence’s mom was portrayed in a book. It showed very unconditional love that a mother has for her son. No matter how hard it was dealing with his son, she still treats him like there’s nothing wrong with him and for me that love is real.
I may have mixed emotions with this book but I recommend this book and see for yourself.
The book was beautifully written, it captures the personality of someone who is considered as a sociopath. Sphinx knew that being near Cadence is dangerous but she decided to stay with him till the end, because she thinks that only her can and will ever understand cadence. The part that I liked most was the emotion that Cadence’s mom was portrayed in a book. It showed very unconditional love that a mother has for her son. No matter how hard it was dealing with his son, she still treats him like there’s nothing wrong with him and for me that love is real.
I may have mixed emotions with this book but I recommend this book and see for yourself.
August 20, 2014
No I understand and get the book but all in all just found it odd and disturbing.
April 23, 2017
"Everyone loved Cadence's eyes, people always said how beautiful they were, how different they were. How utterly out of the ordinary. Sometimes, I thought, being ordinary is best. It was the first time in my life that I realized that something can be so unusual as to be broken, so extraordinary that it means there is something wrong there. "
Cadence, a brilliant, talented and beautiful sociopath.
Sphinx, a submissive normal girl, whom was able to do a(almost)nything for him.
For a terrifying, abusive, dangerous, inhumane, damged boy.
Why? Because she loved him...
What’s wrong with Sphinx?
Any person would stay away from Cadence, even when is dying.
Sphinx’s everlating stubbornness, in not leaving him is nerve-wracking.
Cadence was a disturbing character, but belive it or not Sphinx was even more creepy, once she didn´t even hesitate to stay by his side.
Cadence, a brilliant, talented and beautiful sociopath.
Sphinx, a submissive normal girl, whom was able to do a(almost)nything for him.
For a terrifying, abusive, dangerous, inhumane, damged boy.
Why? Because she loved him...
What’s wrong with Sphinx?
Any person would stay away from Cadence, even when is dying.
Sphinx’s everlating stubbornness, in not leaving him is nerve-wracking.
Cadence was a disturbing character, but belive it or not Sphinx was even more creepy, once she didn´t even hesitate to stay by his side.
February 28, 2022
Scuze dacă vouă v-a plăcut cartea, dar pe mine m-a enervat teribil. 😤
Am citit multe cărți, dintre care multe cu personaje feminine slabe, dar cartea asta le întrece pe toate.
Nici povestea nu mi-a plăcut, singurul motiv pentru care am terminat cartea a fost să văd dacă lui Sphinx îi vine mintea la cap. 🥴
Am citit multe cărți, dintre care multe cu personaje feminine slabe, dar cartea asta le întrece pe toate.
Nici povestea nu mi-a plăcut, singurul motiv pentru care am terminat cartea a fost să văd dacă lui Sphinx îi vine mintea la cap. 🥴
December 4, 2019
4.5 stars!!
I honestly don't understand all the one-star ratings. The main complaints I have seen...
“Cadence had no growth!”
Most Sociopaths don’t.
“What was the point of this story?? I don’t get it!” The point of this story is overcoming your inner demons in this case Sphinx’s demon is Cadence.
Unfortunately to properly defend this novel I will have to go into spoiler territory. So if you haven’t read it what I want you to take away from this review is the fact that this story is disturbing, so disturbing that it settles in the corners of your mind plaguing you for days. But there is beauty in between the madness, Beauty and strength. It is so worth the read.
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
........
It saddens me it seems so many have missed the point, does no one else come to the conclusion Sphinx is deeply depressed? Her mind has been so brain washed, so warped it is almost impossible to separate delusion from reality. This is why she still sees Cadence in a positive light at times. He was her best friend for ten years, her entire childhood. Childhood is such an important stage of ones life, it’s where your brain is developing and Cadence had his hands as firmly grasped on Sphinx as he did that butterfly. And what did he do with that beautiful creature? He crushed it and that is precisely
what he was trying to do Sphinx.
That night he cut her he only showcased what he had been doing to her emotionally for years. Their mothers bless their hearts they meant well I truly believe that but they were so codependent on each other that they drilled it into their children’s head they were soulmates. You do not plan for your newborns to marry each other because you are best friends.
Yes it’s stated their parents didn’t mention the marriage bit until they were older but it doesn’t really matter. They were absolutely obsessed with the plan and Sphinx and Cadence picked up on it.
Sometimes I thought Cadences mother was more upset about her failed plan rather than her child’s diagnosis. ( Not the cancer, I’m talking about him being diagnosed as a sociopath.)
Others have questioned her motives for going down to see him and choosing to stay. Do others not pick up on the sheer desperation of her depression? Now it’s never stated that she has depression but I absolutely believe she does. She needed closure. She needed to separate the reality from delusion.
Sometimes when you’re away from someone long enough, no matter how horrible they were to you eventually the bad memories start to be altered in your mind or evaporate all together. And that’s what happened here.
Cadence was ripped away from her so fast, ( as he should have been) but just because someone is bad for you doesn’t mean you won’t miss them, mourn their absence, even be lost without them as if you were missing a limb. Sphinx missed him so deeply and due to her severe manipulation she had put Cadence on a pedestal. This beautiful dark angel who’s light only shined on rare moments he was with her.
So you see she had to face him, she had to conquer that manipulation or she would have lived her life in the past. Holding on to that scar as if it were a gift from someone she loved forever. Now that scar is a reminder, a reminder that beauty can be evil, beauty can be deceiving, it can slither in your mind and hold on so tight you forget to breathe. But that scar also represents strength because she won.
In the end his manipulation could have ended her life but she beat him. The beautiful irony as she dropped that knife. Not the same knife that had scarred her all those years ago but for symbolic purposes it very well may have been. As that metal hit the floor she chose life. She choose to survive. And let me tell you something if you suffer through depression or anxiety, or anything else that makes you feel emotionally exhausted, drained, like you don’t have what it takes to go on but yet you get up everyday and fight, YOU ARE WINNING.
Sphinx won, she won and now the healing can truly begin and that is beautiful.
Yes this story is disturbing and tragic but it’s also raw and riveting.
There is beauty in between the madness, beauty and strength.
Strength from the mother who loved her son unconditionally though getting nothing in return but a broken heart time and time again.
Beauty from the mother who settled for a long distance friendship for what was best for her daughter, who loved and trusted her daughter enough to make her own decisions while doing her best to keep her safe.
And last but not least both from the girl with the kind heart, the girl who sat by her dying friend until his last moments despite the pain he caused her. The girl who was perhaps the one shining moment in Cadence mother’s life. Both for the girl beautiful enough inside to care but strong enough to live, to fight.
Sphinx refers to Cadence several times in the book as shining but I think it was just her own reflection deflecting off his eyes the entire time.
I honestly don't understand all the one-star ratings. The main complaints I have seen...
“Cadence had no growth!”
Most Sociopaths don’t.
“What was the point of this story?? I don’t get it!” The point of this story is overcoming your inner demons in this case Sphinx’s demon is Cadence.
Unfortunately to properly defend this novel I will have to go into spoiler territory. So if you haven’t read it what I want you to take away from this review is the fact that this story is disturbing, so disturbing that it settles in the corners of your mind plaguing you for days. But there is beauty in between the madness, Beauty and strength. It is so worth the read.
SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS
........
It saddens me it seems so many have missed the point, does no one else come to the conclusion Sphinx is deeply depressed? Her mind has been so brain washed, so warped it is almost impossible to separate delusion from reality. This is why she still sees Cadence in a positive light at times. He was her best friend for ten years, her entire childhood. Childhood is such an important stage of ones life, it’s where your brain is developing and Cadence had his hands as firmly grasped on Sphinx as he did that butterfly. And what did he do with that beautiful creature? He crushed it and that is precisely
what he was trying to do Sphinx.
That night he cut her he only showcased what he had been doing to her emotionally for years. Their mothers bless their hearts they meant well I truly believe that but they were so codependent on each other that they drilled it into their children’s head they were soulmates. You do not plan for your newborns to marry each other because you are best friends.
Yes it’s stated their parents didn’t mention the marriage bit until they were older but it doesn’t really matter. They were absolutely obsessed with the plan and Sphinx and Cadence picked up on it.
Sometimes I thought Cadences mother was more upset about her failed plan rather than her child’s diagnosis. ( Not the cancer, I’m talking about him being diagnosed as a sociopath.)
Others have questioned her motives for going down to see him and choosing to stay. Do others not pick up on the sheer desperation of her depression? Now it’s never stated that she has depression but I absolutely believe she does. She needed closure. She needed to separate the reality from delusion.
Sometimes when you’re away from someone long enough, no matter how horrible they were to you eventually the bad memories start to be altered in your mind or evaporate all together. And that’s what happened here.
Cadence was ripped away from her so fast, ( as he should have been) but just because someone is bad for you doesn’t mean you won’t miss them, mourn their absence, even be lost without them as if you were missing a limb. Sphinx missed him so deeply and due to her severe manipulation she had put Cadence on a pedestal. This beautiful dark angel who’s light only shined on rare moments he was with her.
So you see she had to face him, she had to conquer that manipulation or she would have lived her life in the past. Holding on to that scar as if it were a gift from someone she loved forever. Now that scar is a reminder, a reminder that beauty can be evil, beauty can be deceiving, it can slither in your mind and hold on so tight you forget to breathe. But that scar also represents strength because she won.
In the end his manipulation could have ended her life but she beat him. The beautiful irony as she dropped that knife. Not the same knife that had scarred her all those years ago but for symbolic purposes it very well may have been. As that metal hit the floor she chose life. She choose to survive. And let me tell you something if you suffer through depression or anxiety, or anything else that makes you feel emotionally exhausted, drained, like you don’t have what it takes to go on but yet you get up everyday and fight, YOU ARE WINNING.
Sphinx won, she won and now the healing can truly begin and that is beautiful.
Yes this story is disturbing and tragic but it’s also raw and riveting.
There is beauty in between the madness, beauty and strength.
Strength from the mother who loved her son unconditionally though getting nothing in return but a broken heart time and time again.
Beauty from the mother who settled for a long distance friendship for what was best for her daughter, who loved and trusted her daughter enough to make her own decisions while doing her best to keep her safe.
And last but not least both from the girl with the kind heart, the girl who sat by her dying friend until his last moments despite the pain he caused her. The girl who was perhaps the one shining moment in Cadence mother’s life. Both for the girl beautiful enough inside to care but strong enough to live, to fight.
Sphinx refers to Cadence several times in the book as shining but I think it was just her own reflection deflecting off his eyes the entire time.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 4, 2014
As quick overview of Breaking Butterflies I'd say that the plot had an interesting mix of fairy-tale clichés, Grimm twists, and was just a unique story to tell. The writing style was simple, yet captivating. Also, there was a great sense of what it feels like to be a teenager that I often think is missing from many YA books. I'm glad I read it, but I don't think I would have picked it up without a friend's recommendation. It has elements of both lighthearted teenage love-story and dark mental illness induced self-destruction and abuse.
**SPOILERS** Read on at your own risk.
In a bit more detail here are some other thoughts about Breaking Butterflies. What I, as a 16 year old girl, felt this book did excellently was capture many teenage emotions realistically. The conflicted feeling that Sphinx describes of hiding everything inside herself, but wanting someone to figure out something is wrong and help her, but also feeling like she needs to be strong so she shouldn't reveal anything.
Also, the loyalty that Sphinx felt to Cadence even though he had hurt her in so many ways. I felt that it reflected the worry of a teenager that they might not find something that meaningful again, so the terror of letting it go, even if it is abusive, but possibly losing that level of meaning forever. To me, Breaking Butterflies captured the feeling of being almost grown up, but not quite there yet and trying to deal with issues that can't be discussed with either parents or peers.
A few things that bothered me about Breaking Butterflies, but others may find irrelevant: SCHOOL?? What happened to it? Sphinx is 16 and going to high school and then suddenly it's almost never mentioned again. When you're in school it takes up a lot of time, plus there is homework, and just because your life emotionally derails school doesn't just vanish! Thing two: Sphinx playing soccer. If she is as devoted to playing as she makes out to be, then she would be missing a lot and most people feel guilty for missing team practices and games. And with her powerful sense of loyalty, it seems like she might feel the tiniest bit guilty for basically dropping out of her whole life to stay with Cadence.
One interesting thing about the way that the story is written is that there are relatively few plot lines (either good or bad), and the book focuses on them narrowly (again, good or bad), but each plot line is emotionally complex and has lots of thinking behind it (good). The writing did seem a bit amateur, but I think that can be expected from a book written by such a young author. However, Anjelais did tackle an unusual and difficult set of issues in Breaking Butterflies including abusive relationships, loyalty, love, and mental illness.
**SPOILERS** Read on at your own risk.
In a bit more detail here are some other thoughts about Breaking Butterflies. What I, as a 16 year old girl, felt this book did excellently was capture many teenage emotions realistically. The conflicted feeling that Sphinx describes of hiding everything inside herself, but wanting someone to figure out something is wrong and help her, but also feeling like she needs to be strong so she shouldn't reveal anything.
Also, the loyalty that Sphinx felt to Cadence even though he had hurt her in so many ways. I felt that it reflected the worry of a teenager that they might not find something that meaningful again, so the terror of letting it go, even if it is abusive, but possibly losing that level of meaning forever. To me, Breaking Butterflies captured the feeling of being almost grown up, but not quite there yet and trying to deal with issues that can't be discussed with either parents or peers.
A few things that bothered me about Breaking Butterflies, but others may find irrelevant: SCHOOL?? What happened to it? Sphinx is 16 and going to high school and then suddenly it's almost never mentioned again. When you're in school it takes up a lot of time, plus there is homework, and just because your life emotionally derails school doesn't just vanish! Thing two: Sphinx playing soccer. If she is as devoted to playing as she makes out to be, then she would be missing a lot and most people feel guilty for missing team practices and games. And with her powerful sense of loyalty, it seems like she might feel the tiniest bit guilty for basically dropping out of her whole life to stay with Cadence.
One interesting thing about the way that the story is written is that there are relatively few plot lines (either good or bad), and the book focuses on them narrowly (again, good or bad), but each plot line is emotionally complex and has lots of thinking behind it (good). The writing did seem a bit amateur, but I think that can be expected from a book written by such a young author. However, Anjelais did tackle an unusual and difficult set of issues in Breaking Butterflies including abusive relationships, loyalty, love, and mental illness.
November 3, 2014
Eine so wunderschöne aber auch eigenartige Geschichte die mich zum weinen gebracht hat. Die Idee ist für mich komplett neu und daher auch etwas ganz Besonderes. Das Buch kann ich euch nur ans Herz legen!
♥
♥
January 28, 2020
ridiculous and boring
April 6, 2015
*Worum geht's?*
Sphinx und Cadence sind für einander bestimmt, für einander geschaffen. Schon als ihre Mütter noch Kinder waren, wurden für sie Pläne geschmiedet. Sie sollten miteinander aufwachsen. Beste Freunde werden. Sich lieben lernen. Und tatsächlich schien es für lange Zeit so, als würden der hochbegabte Cadence und die durchschnittliche Sphinx dem Plan ihrer Mütter folgen. Doch Sphinx ist die einzige, die Cadence‘ wahres Ich erkennt. Sie kennt seine strahlende Persönlichkeit, mit der er jeden um seinen Finger wickelt, ebenso gut wie seine grausame Seite, die ohne mit der Wimper zu zucken Schmetterlinge tötet. Als Cadence Sphinx mit einem Messer verletzt und das grausame Spiel zwischen ihnen überspannt, bricht der Kontakt schlagartig ab. Erst viele Jahre später treffen Sphinx und Cadence wieder aufeinander. Denn Cadence ist schwer krank und sein letzter Wunsch ist es, Sphinx wiederzusehen. Sphinx lässt sich darauf ein – und ist schon bald wieder eine Gefangene seines grausamen Spiels…
*Meine Meinung:*
Dass einen in „Killing Butterflies“ keine zuckersüße Geschichte erwartet, wird einem schon klar, wenn man sich nur den Klappentext durchliest. Denn M. Anjelais Debütroman handelt von einer befremdlichen ersten Liebe, die von genau den Dingen geprägt wird, die man für gewöhnlich nicht mit ihr verbindet. „Killing Butterflies“ ist eine Geschichte über Manipulation, Schmerz und Gewalt, eine Geschichte, die ihre Leserschaft spalten wird. Vor allem aber ist es ein Roman, der einen als Leser an seine persönlichen Grenzen treibt und eiskalt unter die Haut geht.
Wie stark diese Geschichte ist, wie sehr einen „Killing Butterflies“ tatsächlich verstören kann, lässt sich nach den ersten verschlungenen Seiten noch lange nicht erahnen. Obwohl M. Anjelais ab der ersten Seite eine unbehagliche Atmosphäre aufkommen lässt, die sich von Absatz zu Absatz verdichtet, beginnt der Roman relativ ruhig. Man lernt Sphinx als Protagonistin kennen, Cadence als ihren besten und begabten Freund, ihre Mütter, die selbst seit Kindertagen miteinander befreundet sind und sich immer eine gemeinsame Zukunft für ihren Nachwuchs gewünscht haben. Eine besinnliche Geschichte, die so schön hätte werden können - wenn nicht alles anders gekommen wäre. Wenn Cadence nicht so anders geworden wäre.
Cadence ist ein sehr extremer Charakter, der einen ebenso stark fasziniert wie abstößt. Man spürt ab dem ersten Moment, dass mit dem begabten Jungen etwas nicht stimmt, dass er das Leben anders wahrnimmt als Sphinx. Cadence sorgt dafür, dass man „Killing Butterflies“ mit einem mulmigen Gefühl liest und nach jeder seltsamen Szene mit ihm das Bedürfnis hat, das Buch zu pausieren. Durchzuatmen. Sich von ihm zu distanzieren. Und doch schafft man es nie, „Killing Butterflies“ tatsächlich zur Seite zu legen. Cadence zieht einen in seinen einzigartigen Bann, fasziniert mit jeder Faser seines Körpers. Man will mehr von ihm als Charakter erfahren, ihn kennenlernen, zu jedem Preis.
Genau das ist auch der Punkt, bis zu dem ich mich mit Sphinx, der Protagonistin des Romans, noch identifizieren konnte. Obwohl sie, das herzensgute Mädchen, nach ihren Erfahrungen mit Cadence allen Grund hätte, um ihn nie wieder sehen zu wollen, willigt sie ein, ihm nach all den Jahren während seiner letzten Tage zu begleiten. Sie sollte ihn fürchten, doch sie fühlt sich von ihm angezogen, ist an ihm als Person stärker interessiert als es ihr gut tut. Sie erliegt seinem Charme, seiner Ausstrahlung, so wie man selbst. Bis zu einem gewissen Zeitpunkt war Sphinx für mich ein normales Mädchen mit einem starken Charakter, eine Protagonistin, die einem ans Herz wächst und der man gerne durch die Seiten hindurch beistehen würde.
Die Geschichte entwickelt sich allerdings in eine Richtung, die einen früher oder später an seine persönlichen Grenzen treibt. Ja, M. Anjalais beschäftigt sich mit einem außergewöhnlichen und faszinierenden Thema in „Killing Butterflies“, das einen wahrlich an die Seiten fesselt und nicht mehr loslässt. Der Verlauf der Handlung nimmt jedoch Formen an, auf deren Extreme und Grausamkeit ich niemals vorbereitet war. Die junge Autorin verfügt über einen eindringlichen und stechenden Schreibstil, mit dem sie Cadence‘ Worte und seine Handlungen direkt unter die Haut ihrer Leser schreiben kann. Mit „Killing Butterflies“ wird es einem eiskalt, schaurig, unwohl. Dennoch löst sich niemals das Band, das einen als Leser an die Seiten fesselt.
So sehr mich die Geschichte auch mitgerissen und fasziniert, mich auf paradoxe Weise begeisternd abgestoßen hat, so enttäuscht muss ich zugeben, dass mich Sphinx ab einem gewissen Punkt nur noch hat den Kopf schütteln lassen. All mein Verständnis, das ich für sie und ihre Faszination für Cadence hatte, verschwand in Folge ihrer naiven und unglaublichen Handlungen und Gedankenstränge im Nichts. Ich verlor meine Beziehung zu ihr gänzlich und war im wahrsten Sinne des Wortes von ihr angeekelt und entsetzt. Durch Sphinx‘ Einstellung, die mich ernsthaft daran zweifeln ließ, wer in „Killing Butterflies“ wirklich krank ist, verschob sich auch mein Blickwinkel auf die Geschichte auf eine Weise, die ich nur bedauern kann.
*Fazit:*
„Killing Butterflies“ von M. Anjelais ist kein Buch für schwache Nerven. Diese Geschichte ist so extrem, vor allem auf psychischer Ebene so krank, brutal und grausam, dass mir beim Lesen ganz anders geworden ist. „Killing Butterflies“ hat mich verstört – und doch war ich zugleich so fasziniert von der Geschichte, dass ich das Buch innerhalb kürzester Zeit verschlang. Cadence und seine Art zogen mich unweigerlich in ihren Bann, ließen mich nicht los, bis ich schließlich mit zitternden Händen die letzte Seite erreicht hatte. Ich wollte immer mehr erfahren und weiterlesen und geriet in einen mitreißenden Lesefluss, einen Strudel aus den schrecklichsten und interessantesten Gefühlen. „Killing Butterflies“ ist wirklich kein Buch, das ich bedingungslos weiterempfehlen kann. Es ist es wert, gelesen zu werden, sofern man es sich selbst denn zutraut! Für mich war es ein gewagtes Experiment, das mich mit seiner Idee und seinem grausamen Charakter begeisterte, mich mit seiner Protagonistin jedoch maßlos enttäuschte. Für „Killing Butterflies“ vergebe ich 3 Lurche.
Sphinx und Cadence sind für einander bestimmt, für einander geschaffen. Schon als ihre Mütter noch Kinder waren, wurden für sie Pläne geschmiedet. Sie sollten miteinander aufwachsen. Beste Freunde werden. Sich lieben lernen. Und tatsächlich schien es für lange Zeit so, als würden der hochbegabte Cadence und die durchschnittliche Sphinx dem Plan ihrer Mütter folgen. Doch Sphinx ist die einzige, die Cadence‘ wahres Ich erkennt. Sie kennt seine strahlende Persönlichkeit, mit der er jeden um seinen Finger wickelt, ebenso gut wie seine grausame Seite, die ohne mit der Wimper zu zucken Schmetterlinge tötet. Als Cadence Sphinx mit einem Messer verletzt und das grausame Spiel zwischen ihnen überspannt, bricht der Kontakt schlagartig ab. Erst viele Jahre später treffen Sphinx und Cadence wieder aufeinander. Denn Cadence ist schwer krank und sein letzter Wunsch ist es, Sphinx wiederzusehen. Sphinx lässt sich darauf ein – und ist schon bald wieder eine Gefangene seines grausamen Spiels…
*Meine Meinung:*
Dass einen in „Killing Butterflies“ keine zuckersüße Geschichte erwartet, wird einem schon klar, wenn man sich nur den Klappentext durchliest. Denn M. Anjelais Debütroman handelt von einer befremdlichen ersten Liebe, die von genau den Dingen geprägt wird, die man für gewöhnlich nicht mit ihr verbindet. „Killing Butterflies“ ist eine Geschichte über Manipulation, Schmerz und Gewalt, eine Geschichte, die ihre Leserschaft spalten wird. Vor allem aber ist es ein Roman, der einen als Leser an seine persönlichen Grenzen treibt und eiskalt unter die Haut geht.
Wie stark diese Geschichte ist, wie sehr einen „Killing Butterflies“ tatsächlich verstören kann, lässt sich nach den ersten verschlungenen Seiten noch lange nicht erahnen. Obwohl M. Anjelais ab der ersten Seite eine unbehagliche Atmosphäre aufkommen lässt, die sich von Absatz zu Absatz verdichtet, beginnt der Roman relativ ruhig. Man lernt Sphinx als Protagonistin kennen, Cadence als ihren besten und begabten Freund, ihre Mütter, die selbst seit Kindertagen miteinander befreundet sind und sich immer eine gemeinsame Zukunft für ihren Nachwuchs gewünscht haben. Eine besinnliche Geschichte, die so schön hätte werden können - wenn nicht alles anders gekommen wäre. Wenn Cadence nicht so anders geworden wäre.
Cadence ist ein sehr extremer Charakter, der einen ebenso stark fasziniert wie abstößt. Man spürt ab dem ersten Moment, dass mit dem begabten Jungen etwas nicht stimmt, dass er das Leben anders wahrnimmt als Sphinx. Cadence sorgt dafür, dass man „Killing Butterflies“ mit einem mulmigen Gefühl liest und nach jeder seltsamen Szene mit ihm das Bedürfnis hat, das Buch zu pausieren. Durchzuatmen. Sich von ihm zu distanzieren. Und doch schafft man es nie, „Killing Butterflies“ tatsächlich zur Seite zu legen. Cadence zieht einen in seinen einzigartigen Bann, fasziniert mit jeder Faser seines Körpers. Man will mehr von ihm als Charakter erfahren, ihn kennenlernen, zu jedem Preis.
Genau das ist auch der Punkt, bis zu dem ich mich mit Sphinx, der Protagonistin des Romans, noch identifizieren konnte. Obwohl sie, das herzensgute Mädchen, nach ihren Erfahrungen mit Cadence allen Grund hätte, um ihn nie wieder sehen zu wollen, willigt sie ein, ihm nach all den Jahren während seiner letzten Tage zu begleiten. Sie sollte ihn fürchten, doch sie fühlt sich von ihm angezogen, ist an ihm als Person stärker interessiert als es ihr gut tut. Sie erliegt seinem Charme, seiner Ausstrahlung, so wie man selbst. Bis zu einem gewissen Zeitpunkt war Sphinx für mich ein normales Mädchen mit einem starken Charakter, eine Protagonistin, die einem ans Herz wächst und der man gerne durch die Seiten hindurch beistehen würde.
Die Geschichte entwickelt sich allerdings in eine Richtung, die einen früher oder später an seine persönlichen Grenzen treibt. Ja, M. Anjalais beschäftigt sich mit einem außergewöhnlichen und faszinierenden Thema in „Killing Butterflies“, das einen wahrlich an die Seiten fesselt und nicht mehr loslässt. Der Verlauf der Handlung nimmt jedoch Formen an, auf deren Extreme und Grausamkeit ich niemals vorbereitet war. Die junge Autorin verfügt über einen eindringlichen und stechenden Schreibstil, mit dem sie Cadence‘ Worte und seine Handlungen direkt unter die Haut ihrer Leser schreiben kann. Mit „Killing Butterflies“ wird es einem eiskalt, schaurig, unwohl. Dennoch löst sich niemals das Band, das einen als Leser an die Seiten fesselt.
So sehr mich die Geschichte auch mitgerissen und fasziniert, mich auf paradoxe Weise begeisternd abgestoßen hat, so enttäuscht muss ich zugeben, dass mich Sphinx ab einem gewissen Punkt nur noch hat den Kopf schütteln lassen. All mein Verständnis, das ich für sie und ihre Faszination für Cadence hatte, verschwand in Folge ihrer naiven und unglaublichen Handlungen und Gedankenstränge im Nichts. Ich verlor meine Beziehung zu ihr gänzlich und war im wahrsten Sinne des Wortes von ihr angeekelt und entsetzt. Durch Sphinx‘ Einstellung, die mich ernsthaft daran zweifeln ließ, wer in „Killing Butterflies“ wirklich krank ist, verschob sich auch mein Blickwinkel auf die Geschichte auf eine Weise, die ich nur bedauern kann.
*Fazit:*
„Killing Butterflies“ von M. Anjelais ist kein Buch für schwache Nerven. Diese Geschichte ist so extrem, vor allem auf psychischer Ebene so krank, brutal und grausam, dass mir beim Lesen ganz anders geworden ist. „Killing Butterflies“ hat mich verstört – und doch war ich zugleich so fasziniert von der Geschichte, dass ich das Buch innerhalb kürzester Zeit verschlang. Cadence und seine Art zogen mich unweigerlich in ihren Bann, ließen mich nicht los, bis ich schließlich mit zitternden Händen die letzte Seite erreicht hatte. Ich wollte immer mehr erfahren und weiterlesen und geriet in einen mitreißenden Lesefluss, einen Strudel aus den schrecklichsten und interessantesten Gefühlen. „Killing Butterflies“ ist wirklich kein Buch, das ich bedingungslos weiterempfehlen kann. Es ist es wert, gelesen zu werden, sofern man es sich selbst denn zutraut! Für mich war es ein gewagtes Experiment, das mich mit seiner Idee und seinem grausamen Charakter begeisterte, mich mit seiner Protagonistin jedoch maßlos enttäuschte. Für „Killing Butterflies“ vergebe ich 3 Lurche.
May 12, 2019
O carte ciudatica pentru inceput, o poveste bazata pe un plan ce il fac cele doua prietene in copilaria lor, Leight si Sarah. Un plan care m-a enervat si sincer nu am inteles-o pe fiica lui Sarah. Cum poate sa accepte asa ceva de la un copil bolnav psihic. Pe scurt doua fetite in copilaria lor au devenit prietene pe viata si au facut un plan sa isi casatoreasca copii intre ei si sa duca mai departe prietenia lor. Acest lucru nu a prea decurs asa cum au vrut ele. Dupa ce s-au casatorit, Leight a avut un baiat, pe Cadence si Sarah o fata , pe Sphinxie. In urma unei intamplari din copilaria lor, Sarah il ura pe Cadence dar totodata incerca sa il inteleaga, dupa ce medici i-au pus un diagnostic grav, atat mental cat si fizic. Dupa ce a aflat ca e bolnav si ca nu mai are mult de trait a decis sa mearga in vizita la el si sa ramana alaturi de el pana la sfarsit. Sincer , Sphinxie se purta ca o marioneta in preajma lui Cadence lucru care m-a enervat. Abia am asteptam sa dau fila cu fila sa vad ca se intampla pana la sfarsit...
March 23, 2023
Ich weiß gar nicht, was ich so richtig sagen soll...
'Killing Butterflies' hat mich total verstört und mich mehr als einmal weinen lassen.
Ich habe, als ich den Klappentext gelesen habe, eine völlig andere Geschichte erwartet. Ich dachte, es sei eine Liebesgeschichte, aber das Buch war alles andere als eine schöne Liebesgeschichte.
Die Geschichte von Spinx und Cadence beginnt total schön. Aber auf einmal kommt ein Wendepunkt, der mich verstört, schockiert und fassungslos zurückgelassen hat. Ich hab kurz überlegt, dass Buch abzubrechen, aber ich wollte trotzdem unbedingt wissen, wie es weitergeht. Als bei Candence dann eine Krankheit und Spinx bei ihm bleibt hab ich so viel in Frage gestellt, war schockiert und trotzdem fand ich es toll von Spinx. Ich muss sagen, dass ich totale Angst um sie hatte und fast froh war, dass es mit Cadence zu Ende war.
Wenn ihr das Buch lesen wollt, dann möchte ich hier eine größes TW aussprechen! Es werden sehr schwere Themen behandelt und das Buch wirkt sehr verstörend. Man muss sich dessen bewusst sein, dass ist keine leichte Lektüre und dennoch war es trotzdem eine interessante Geschichte. Die Schreibweise ist auch total anders als gewohnt, aber es lässt sich relativ leicht lesen.
'Killing Butterflies' hat mich total verstört und mich mehr als einmal weinen lassen.
Ich habe, als ich den Klappentext gelesen habe, eine völlig andere Geschichte erwartet. Ich dachte, es sei eine Liebesgeschichte, aber das Buch war alles andere als eine schöne Liebesgeschichte.
Die Geschichte von Spinx und Cadence beginnt total schön. Aber auf einmal kommt ein Wendepunkt, der mich verstört, schockiert und fassungslos zurückgelassen hat. Ich hab kurz überlegt, dass Buch abzubrechen, aber ich wollte trotzdem unbedingt wissen, wie es weitergeht. Als bei Candence dann eine Krankheit und Spinx bei ihm bleibt hab ich so viel in Frage gestellt, war schockiert und trotzdem fand ich es toll von Spinx. Ich muss sagen, dass ich totale Angst um sie hatte und fast froh war, dass es mit Cadence zu Ende war.
Wenn ihr das Buch lesen wollt, dann möchte ich hier eine größes TW aussprechen! Es werden sehr schwere Themen behandelt und das Buch wirkt sehr verstörend. Man muss sich dessen bewusst sein, dass ist keine leichte Lektüre und dennoch war es trotzdem eine interessante Geschichte. Die Schreibweise ist auch total anders als gewohnt, aber es lässt sich relativ leicht lesen.
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September 28, 2018Tom Marcus Anjelais, or M. Anjelais' novel Breaking Butterflies, is a fiction book about a first love. This book is about a first love and the hardships that Sphinx faces through her experience with the boy who hurt her. Sphinx goes through difficult times and pain which helps her grow stronger and eventually find peace.
M. Anjelais made the setting, characters, and plot very unique. The setting takes place in two countries that are very different, but alike. The main characters are opposite of each other, one is caring and the other only depends on them self. The plot in this book is very different from other books and causes you to continue reading so you can find out what happens next. These three elements of fiction make this book very interesting and unique.
I really enjoyed reading this book, I liked how the story ended peacefully, but I don't like how an animal died. This story was very interesting and I didn't lose interest while reading it. I would rate this book 4 out of 5 stars. I would recommend this book to people who like excitement and aren't afraid of violence.
M. Anjelais made the setting, characters, and plot very unique. The setting takes place in two countries that are very different, but alike. The main characters are opposite of each other, one is caring and the other only depends on them self. The plot in this book is very different from other books and causes you to continue reading so you can find out what happens next. These three elements of fiction make this book very interesting and unique.
I really enjoyed reading this book, I liked how the story ended peacefully, but I don't like how an animal died. This story was very interesting and I didn't lose interest while reading it. I would rate this book 4 out of 5 stars. I would recommend this book to people who like excitement and aren't afraid of violence.
May 21, 2023
O poveste groaznica! 4 stelute!
February 17, 2018
Heartbreaking 😢
September 30, 2015
{My Thougts} – Two seven year-old girls named Leigh and Sarah plan out their entire lives underneath a tent sheet. They map out their whole lives from what they’ll be when they grow up, to what they will name their children, to even what their children will do when they grow up. Some plans run into bumps and then new plans need to be made to replace the old failed plans and this book is about planning, re-planning and replacing failed plans of the future.
Leigh and Sarah decide that they will each have one child a piece. Leigh a boy and Sarah a girl. They decide to name their children Sphinxie and Cadence. Sphinxie and Cadence grow up knowing the plan their mother’s had hatched that day under the sheet tent. They two children grow up being bestfriends or believing at least that that is what they are to one another. They grow up celebrating birthdays together, playing with one another and being around one another all the time.
Around the time they are ten Cadence does something unthinkable. He hurts Sphinxie, he cuts her with a knife and causes her to need 15 stitches. After that Leigh and Cadence move to England. The plan has started to crumble. The plan has started to fall a part. Leigh has problems dealing with Cadence. He ends up seeing many doctors and eventually he gets two diagnosis. Once Leigh shares with Sarah and the other she keeps secret.
When Cadence is sixteen he asks for Sphinxie to visit. He wants to see her. He wants to spend time with her. She feels drawn to him and she goes. Her and her mother go all the way to England so that she can see her childhood friend again. Cadence tells Sphinxie the secret his mother kept. The secret that hadn’t been shared. The secret had she had she known she probably would not have been so willing to visit.
Ever since Sphinxie was little her parents and her had known that Cadence was different, troubled a child that had issues and problems. She learned just what all that meant when he told her his secret, what was wrong with him what the doctors told him and his mother.
—————
When I had first started reading this book my first thoughts were that child has some serious problems. I guessed as to what his issues were and I wasn’t far off, the hints within the book really do help you to understand and realize what you are going to read in the later pages.
I think Cadence although a troubled boy had his own conflicts with life. I think he had his own way of dealing with things and he had his own way of figuring things out because he really had no other choice. I can’t begin to relate with him as I have not dealt with such issues but I can some what understand him in a way. Although I am not sure one can truly understand an individual such as him.
Sphinxie. She was such a normal, loving, emotional child. She was curious. She loved the idea of her mother’s plan for her. She, like her mother wanted it to come true. Sometimes things change. She felt drawn to him, I think because of that plan that had been made. She felt that she needed to be there for him no matter the danger she put herself in. In the end, she was brave. She was braver then I would even have been at 16. I couldn’t imagine going through all the things she went through because of Cadence. I couldn’t, but all of it only made her stronger. She is truly a character to look up to and admire. Despite all the bad that her life had been because of that boy, in the end she found a way to turn it all into something good and positive. A lesson every teenager can learn.
I highly recommend this book for anyone that is having struggles with relationships, mental illness and just lost in todays world. It is so easy to be just lost and want to follow some one else’s lead. This book shows you what can happen when you do that and when you choose to stop!
Leigh and Sarah decide that they will each have one child a piece. Leigh a boy and Sarah a girl. They decide to name their children Sphinxie and Cadence. Sphinxie and Cadence grow up knowing the plan their mother’s had hatched that day under the sheet tent. They two children grow up being bestfriends or believing at least that that is what they are to one another. They grow up celebrating birthdays together, playing with one another and being around one another all the time.
Around the time they are ten Cadence does something unthinkable. He hurts Sphinxie, he cuts her with a knife and causes her to need 15 stitches. After that Leigh and Cadence move to England. The plan has started to crumble. The plan has started to fall a part. Leigh has problems dealing with Cadence. He ends up seeing many doctors and eventually he gets two diagnosis. Once Leigh shares with Sarah and the other she keeps secret.
When Cadence is sixteen he asks for Sphinxie to visit. He wants to see her. He wants to spend time with her. She feels drawn to him and she goes. Her and her mother go all the way to England so that she can see her childhood friend again. Cadence tells Sphinxie the secret his mother kept. The secret that hadn’t been shared. The secret had she had she known she probably would not have been so willing to visit.
Ever since Sphinxie was little her parents and her had known that Cadence was different, troubled a child that had issues and problems. She learned just what all that meant when he told her his secret, what was wrong with him what the doctors told him and his mother.
—————
When I had first started reading this book my first thoughts were that child has some serious problems. I guessed as to what his issues were and I wasn’t far off, the hints within the book really do help you to understand and realize what you are going to read in the later pages.
I think Cadence although a troubled boy had his own conflicts with life. I think he had his own way of dealing with things and he had his own way of figuring things out because he really had no other choice. I can’t begin to relate with him as I have not dealt with such issues but I can some what understand him in a way. Although I am not sure one can truly understand an individual such as him.
Sphinxie. She was such a normal, loving, emotional child. She was curious. She loved the idea of her mother’s plan for her. She, like her mother wanted it to come true. Sometimes things change. She felt drawn to him, I think because of that plan that had been made. She felt that she needed to be there for him no matter the danger she put herself in. In the end, she was brave. She was braver then I would even have been at 16. I couldn’t imagine going through all the things she went through because of Cadence. I couldn’t, but all of it only made her stronger. She is truly a character to look up to and admire. Despite all the bad that her life had been because of that boy, in the end she found a way to turn it all into something good and positive. A lesson every teenager can learn.
I highly recommend this book for anyone that is having struggles with relationships, mental illness and just lost in todays world. It is so easy to be just lost and want to follow some one else’s lead. This book shows you what can happen when you do that and when you choose to stop!
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