My Brother's Ashes are in a Sandwich Bag

by Michelle Brasier

Your future is not guaranteed. And isn’t that fucking freeing? If you found out you had less time to live than the average bear, how might you spend it? That’s a question comedian Michelle Brasier has been asking herself since her dad died of cancer, then her brother, and she was told there’s a high chance she’ll get it too. She’s only young (oh my god so young, and such great skin) but she has been through a lot and it’s taught her to live each day like it’s her last – because it just might be.   From teenage fumblings in the back of a car in Wagga Wagga (teen pregnancy capital of Australia), to performing with Aunty Donna and her own sell-out comedy shows, Michelle invites you into the highs (seeing Jason Momoa drinking a Guinness next a classic car in SoHo) and the lows (getting dumped ¾ of the way through Pirates of the Caribbean).   It’s an examination of the tiny things and the big things – how much it hurts to be a woman and a person, and how funny it is to try and get into shapewear and how funerals are silly. It’s self help for those of us who hate self help. A bit of a laugh and a bit of a cry. Balance. Yoga in the morning, whisky in the evening.  Heartbreaking and hilarious, My Brother’s Ashes are in a Sandwich Bag moves between grief and joy, reminding us that life’s too short to be taken seriously. 

Genres: Nonfiction, Audiobook, Memoir, Biography Memoir, Humor, Biography, Comedy

303 pages, Paperback

First published September 4, 2024

Reviews

[Eilish Gilligan · Rating 5 out of 5]

i was lucky to get my hands on an advance copy of this beautiful book, and i feel so lucky to have been able to read it early!

i think the best way to describe this book is that often i would find myself crying at the beginning of a paragraph, and then laughing out loud by the time it was over. michelle brasier has such a strong, clear voice, and sometimes her observations were so eerily accurate i had to read it again to check that she really just echoed my own thoughts (i.e. always feeling like you want to get changed when in sydney, and holding the belief that no one 'normal' would ever describe themselves as an empath).

i just LOVED this book, and as someone who feels everything so deeply all the time i felt that i found a kindred spirit here

[Kayla Hunnisett · Rating 5 out of 5]

Utterly besotted! One for the girls!!! I met Michelle very briefly at an Ultimo Press night in a bar in Chippendale in February and she was magnetic, warm, hilarious, real. She did a reading from her book and it made me cry and I vowed to buy her book when it came out and I’m damn glad I did. Loved it, loved it, loved it!!!

[EmG ReadsDaily · Rating 4 out of 5]

Humorous, entertaining and plenty of raw insights into the fragility of life, grief and resilience.

[Donna · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book! It was funny and sweet and gut wrenching all at once.
The only negative thing I can say about it is that it is a true travesty that Michelle has never watched Dirty Dancing. May this be rectified.

[Morgs · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bounced back and forth between laughing out loud and feeling immense sadness for Michelle and the heart break she has experienced. A vulnerable, gut wrenching, funny, relatable and ultimately heart warming book that I didn't want to put down.

[Eva · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love the girl one from Aunty Donna. Swung between laughing and crying so often throughout this. Audiobook performance experience is a must.

Also related-ish but reading Froomes' book and this B2B and they both had a chapter about how thinking about being skinny is women's Roman Empire, uncanny and also depressing.

[Elyssa Hawkins]

No rating since it’s a memoir, but if you’re an Aussie girl with a darker sense of humour, this is a MUST read. Obssesed with how seen I felt reading this, absolutely phenomenal ❤️

[Clementine · Rating 5 out of 5]

hard to describe how this made me feel without sounding a bit live laugh love, which the book never does because she’s such a funny and capable writer. had to just accept that I’d be laughing and crying fairly consistently the whole time lovely lovely lovely

[Alex LB · Rating 4 out of 5]

The first few chapters of this book had me laughing and crying at the same time. I was blown away by Michelle's beautiful writing, her almost spoken-word performance of her audiobook, her honesty and vulnerability. I would have loved to see her perform her show Average Bear, which is the thesis of this memoir: If you found out you had less time to live than the average bear, how would you spend it? There were chapters scattered throughout about her brother, who died young from cancer, that would pack an emotional punch out of nowhere, and I would have to stop washing the dishes and go sit down to process it. Alternatively, Michelle sounds like a lot of fun, and boy does she get into some crazy scrapes! But as the book went on, it started to lose shape, and its central thesis was lost. There are a lot of chapters about the film and television industry, comedy, the Fringe, that are somewhat interesting to an outsider, but felt more like a conversation Michelle should be having with her comedy friends. There were a lot of names I recognized from Australian comedy and thought, hey, I know them! But these references felt very important and heartfelt between Michelle and that person, and not necessary for me as the reader. I enjoyed it, but as with most memoirs, I think, would I recommend this to someone who doesn't know who this person is? The answer in this case is probably not, even though it is excellently written and brilliantly performed. But if you're a millennial woman interested in alt comedy and concerned about your mortality, definitely give this one a go.

[Eleni · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love Michelle and her philosophy of life. Really enjoyed the short chapters. It was definitely a pick up put down read and never felt I had to go back and reread anything. I laughed and cried. If I ever meet Michelle, expect a big hug!

[G · Rating 2 out of 5]

There are some beautiful passages in this book, but I could not finish this. It’s like reading a memoir on shuffle - it jumps around with no coherent flow. Forced comedy is priority over any kind of story telling which is a shame as there were moments of stunning writing between the wreck.

[Courtney Shannon · Rating 5 out of 5]

a moving account of love, grief, and womanhood, with super sharp writing that swings between wildly funny and utterly crushing. i highly recommend listening to the audiobook, narrated by the author.

[Emily Conaghan 🐛 · Rating 5 out of 5]

I own the first ever signed copy of this book!!

[Em Cow · Rating 4 out of 5]

Whilst this book has some beautiful reflective moments and discussion of grief, it's jumpy to the point of confusion, selling out opportunities for storytelling to make a laugh instead. Michelle Brasier touches on the grief and process of losing both her father and brother to cancer, but the book also flits between lists and anecdotal moments of other relationships in her life or significant events (by no means chronologically, some of it repetitively.)

[Caitlyn Barker · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don’t think I’ve ever read a book that had me laughing just as much as it had me crying.

Michelle’s voice in her written word is so strong.
We already know she is a talented comedian, but this book really proves her craft of poetry and lyricism.

She says she feels like an almost, but from the outside I see such a full and whole being. What a gift we are all receiving by her sharing herself with the world in all of her art forms.

[Annabel Bowles · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is utterly brilliant. Michelle, I wanna join your witch coven!!

I laughed and cried and saw the world again in full colour. A reminder to love the absolute shit out of your friends and tell them why you love them. To see the best in people, to become friends with the secondary characters in your life. That you’ll have dozens of life-changing, affirming friendships and many of them will be fleeting and that’s okay. Make silly mistakes and stop caring about being cool. Be a bonobo!!

[Natalie Turner · Rating 5 out of 5]

So funny, relatable and sad. Loved every bit of this - I read the physical book but I think I need to listen to the audiobook!!

[Meg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Michelle Brasier is so talented! I will consume all her content forever. I am so grateful to her for sharing her stories.

[Carla · Rating 4 out of 5]

⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

Michelle is a fantastic writer and a master at injecting comedy into even the saddest moments of her life

[Jess Brien · Rating 5 out of 5]

Best memoir of 2024! A good dose of perspective to remember to be grateful and love the shit out of this life!

[maddie · Rating 5 out of 5]

amazing memoir, please audiobook it!!! i’m constantly in awe of michelle and this was such a heartbreaking yet heartwarming read and i loved it

[Madeleine Sparks · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is the equivalent of one of my favourite Dolly Parton quotes: “Laughter through tears is my favourite emotion!”

11/10 no notes

[Chloe Elisabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Michelle Brasier is a national treasure. This book will break your heart and piece it back together again - with strict instructions to live your life as enthusiastically and authentically as Michelle and also a Labrador called Eva.

[Lucy Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Michelle is a pure, unflinching talent. I am in awe of how she does it.

I’ve poured over every word of this book multiple times, and I felt so seen and heard by some of the stories and anecdotes she tells. I can’t recommend “My Brothers Ashes” enough to anyone that will listen to me!

[Rosie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding debut from one of Australia’s most charming, disarming and fascinating comedians. Couldn’t put it down!

[violet · Rating 5 out of 5]

laughed and cried the entire time

[Ellie Nunan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fucked good. Imagine a good friend making you really laugh and then suddenly you’re crying but they didn’t mean make you cry it’s just what they said was fucking sad and then you laugh again.

[Megan Emerson · Rating 5 out of 5]

‘My Brother's Ashes Are In A Sandwich Bag’ by Michelle Brasier has instantly become my top read of 2024 so far! The startling transparency was completely, addictingly engrossing from the very first line (and it’s worth it for the excellent playlists sprinkled throughout).

It was an achingly poignant self-indulgence into the nostalgia and humour of living through pain, grief, illness, womanhood, heartbreak, Buffy, queerness (same thing) and horniness (ditto). Mostly, though, it paints a vivid picture of what it means to find yourself swept up in the magic of the people around you.

The descriptions are masterfully tactile in their simplicity. The specificity of the places, people, sensations that have made up Michelle are brought to life with a tender wit.

Her voice carries so singularly that I bought the audiobook to listen to her speak certain chapters after reading them and laughed out loud on public transport (ew) multiple times. I highly recommend the audiobook method of consumption. (It has a terrifically sad line that was cut from the book still in it, that Michelle mentioned during her Melbourne book launch.)

I particularly resonated with the sentiment of becoming a ‘featured extra’ in people’s lives. The idea that simple acts of vulnerability and fleetingly shared experiences can impress you in the minds of strangers was compellingly beautiful to me. Imagine the poetic beauty and UTTER shock to find that this would be further driven home by Michelle briefly recounting a moment between her and I on the last page of the book. Post-show whisky and trauma dumping goes hard. So when I say this felt written for me, you guys, it basically was.

[Kim Wakefield]

Michelle Brasier is an Australian comedian. Her father died of cancer, her brother died of cancer, and there's a high chance she will get cancer too. She's a rambler, rambling about her teen years in Wagga Wagga, her comedy shows, and other weird, endearing, and occasionally profound ramblings.

I didn't know who Michelle Braiser was before listening to this book. Now that I've listened, I know she's absolutely mental. I know I want to be her friend. I know there should be more stories about 30+ year old women telling their stories unapologetically, with zero fucks given, being completely unhinged, while doing exactly what they want.

[Kali · Rating 4 out of 5]

Humourous, sad and honest. A lot of very earnest chats about loved ones, friendship, relationships and life's difficult moments. Made me giggle at times at the authenticity, thrown in between a passage of quite heavy material.

So many good quotes: "I'm forever trying to bring all of the groceries from the car to my apartment in one trip, but I've never done it without dropping something and breaking it. We can't hold everything. It's ok to drop some things. You know where they are on the ground, just grab them when you need them. ..............

So put something down. And talk to each other. Or learn to juggle really well and join the circus."