Be a People Person: Effective Leadership Through Effective Relationships

by John C. Maxwell

You can bring out the best in people! In Be a People Person , America's leadership expert John Maxwell helps you Being a leader means working with people, and that's not always easy! Whether in your office, church, neighborhood, or elsewhere, your interpersonal relationships can make or break you as a leader. That's why it's so important to be a "people person" and develop your skills in tapping that most precious of all people.

Loaded with life-enriching, life-changing principles for relating positively and powerfully with your family, friends, colleagues, and clients, Be a People Person is certain to help you bring out the best in others—and that's what effective leadership is all about.

Genres: Leadership, Business, Nonfiction, Self Help, Personal Development, Relationships, Christian

192 pages, Hardcover

First published August 1, 2005

About the author

John Calvin Maxwell is an American author, speaker, and pastor who has written many books, primarily focusing on leadership. Titles include The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership and The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader. Some of his books have been on the New York Times Best Seller List.

Reviews

[Venus Guyos · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great dig from this one:
The secret of "The People Person" is CHARISMA (gift of grace)which stands for:
C: Concern/to show care
H: Help/to reach out
A: Action/to make things happen
R: Results/to produce
I: Influence/to lead
S: Sensitivity/to feel and respond
M: Motivation/to give hope
A: Affirmation/to build up

Say, CHARISMA!

[J.D. Estrada · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having talent is a wonderful thing, but talent alone does not a winner make. A winner is so because they have talent, discipline, and more often than not work well with others. The way you treat others says more about yourself than you think and this book is a lovely reminder of that. Through his down to earth style, John C. Maxwell offers various perspectives and new angles to see how you treat others. It is honest and spoken from his perspective, which means there are Bible quotes and a lot of examples based on his experience with churches and congregations. I mention that small caveat because I suspect that people of other denominations, may be turned off by it, which would be a shame since I think there are plenty of things here to apply to life regardless of race, creed, gender, or nationality. Am I saying this book is a game changer? No; but I am saying that if you take these words to heart it CAN be a game changer like many books within this genre.

That said, there are "dad" jokes, real life accounts, and a whole lot of honesty, and that's what I think is most importantly. If you look at what is being said and shared, it's a condensed book of lovely reminders of how to be a better person. Sure, the title says be a people person, but the focus is on you being better, and thusly a people person.

Personal growth is something a lot of people aren't into and conformity is a current day plague where people play it safe. This book is about being honest, about being you, about not pushing the blame onto other people, of recognizing your inner light and letting it shine by inspiring others to shine.

Does it offer leadership tips that will help people? Of course. It is full of them, but the main thing for leaders and bosses to take with this book is that if you don't insist on dropping the boss attitude and treating others as peers instead of subordinates, this will merely look good on your bookshelf.

So the invitation is there. Read. Internalize. Apply to your life. Be kind. Encourage. Inspire. And please, repeat as often as humanly possible.

[John Ready Reader One · Rating 3 out of 5]

Maxwell always delivers meaningful leadership insights. This particular book is told with a lot of knowledge gained from his work as a pastor in a Christian church (es). The leadership principles are valid in any leadership role across the board. My main issue with this one is that it seems Maxwell was trying to put in every cliche statement he could in this one. E.G. "Its hard to fly like an eagle when you are surrounded by turkeys." It felt like every single leadership principle was followed by some cliche. A couple if fine but it started to drag on me. Its like that leader that repeats the same ones over and over and everyone rolls their eyes and thinks "here he goes again."

[Bruce · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very good book on relationships and communication skills - uses his experience as a Pastor in America and makes great comments relevant to all walks of life. Well written.
Listened via audio-books - easy to follow

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

There are some good thoughts here about leadership and being a good person. Here are some quotes I liked:

"Do we run from problems or face them? Do we talk more about bad news or good news? Do we give people the benefit of the doubt, or do we assume the worse? (p. 13)"

"What's the key to relating to others? It's putting yourself in someone else's place instead of putting them in their place. Christ gave the perfect rule for establishing quality human relationships. We call it the Golden Rule (p. 13)."

"The happiest people are those who have invested their time in others. The unhappiest people are those who wonder how the world is going to make them happy (p. 20)."

"We cannot underestimate the value of a single person (p. 21)."

"Treat others as you want them to treat you. Treat them as if they are important; they will respond according to the way that you perceive them (p. 22)."

"The two great marks of a Christian are that they are giving and forgiving (p. 23)."

"Too often people wait too long to forgive other people (p. 24)."

"There's a difference between hearing people and listening to them. Listening is wanting to hear (p. 26)."

"You want others to encourage you, appreciate you, forgive you, listen to you, understand you (p. 28)."

"The happiest day of your life will be the day when you realize 'we' really is the most important word in the English language (p. 29)."

"Using the word CHARISMA as an acrostic, we can define the outstanding characteristics of charismatic people:
Concern (the ability to show you care)
Help (the ability to reach out)
Action (the ability to make things happen)
Results (the ability to produce)
Influence (the ability to lead)
Sensitivity (the ability to feel and respond)
Motivation (the ability to give hope)
Affirmation (the ability to build up) (p. 32)."

"Charismatic people are helpers (p. 34)."

"Help others with difficulties.
Tell them it takes time.
Expose yourself to their problems in order to relate to them.
Assure them of your confidence in them.
Creatively show them how to deal with their problems.
Offer Hope to them through the process (p. 35)."

"Charismatic people... are adept at taking advantage of the mood, feeling, and spirit of any situation (p. 38)."

"Take the initiative to find a need and take action (p. 39)."

"The secret of motivating others is providing them with hope (p. 39)."

"Do you convey hope or despair to those around you? Learn affirmation skills, problem-solving techniques, ways to verbally encourage others, and convey belief and support in others (p. 40)."

"We tend to become what the most important person in our life things we will become (p. 40)."

"Charisma is being more concerned about making others feel good about themselves than you are in making them feel good about you! (p. 42)"

"Our choice of associates will have a tremendous bearing on our confidence level (p. 46)."

"If the first thing confidence does is to stabilize you, the second thing it does is to stretch you (p. 49)."

"The moment you place a label on someone, you begin to treat him or her accordingly (p. 50)."

"God thought so much of you, believed in you, and saw you as a person of such worth, that he allowed his son to die so that you could live (p. 52)."

"Confidence is not the result of an absence of problems... Confidence is a result of trusting God in our problems (p. 53)."

"Another way to increase your confidence is to quit comparing yourself with others (p. 57)."

"Confidence is not a constant; it fluctuates according to your success/failure ratio (p. 58)."

"Confidence can provide the momentum you need to be the person God meant you to be (p. 60)."

"Contentment is being confident that you measure up to any test you are facing because Christ has made his strength available to you (p. 61)."

"Establish your worth according to God's value system (p. 62)."

"'Leadership is the capacity and will to rally men and women to a common purpose and the character which inspires confidence' (Bernard Montgomery, p. 65)."

"True leadership comes from serving others (p. 65)."

"People who are called discover something bigger than themselves: a mission, a challenge, a goal, or a movement that draws them into an arena (p. 67)."

"Good communicators are able to convey a strong belief in their people; there is a very high trust factor (p. 70)."

"Everyone faces problems. The ability to creatively find solutions will determine the success or failure of each difficulty (p. 74)."

"Real leaders have something to give, and they give it freely (p. 75)."

"A goal is a dream with a deadline (p. 87)."

"Effective persuasion takes into account a person's emotions (p. 89)."

"Leaders have two important characteristics: They are going somewhere, and they are able to persuade other people to go with them (p. 93)."

"To 'persuade' means to use sweetness to get people to do things (p. 98)."

"A person of integrity is one who has established a system of values against which all life is judged (p. 105)."

"The first priority of any Christian should be his or her relationship with God... Our second priority should be our family responsibilities and our third concern should be our ministry or career commitments (p. 106)."

"Do I make decisions based on what is right or what is most easily accepted? Am I a leader or a follower (p. 110)?"

"The key to encouragement is in knowing what gives people courage, what spurs them on to action (p. 117)."

"People are encouraged to continue behavior that brings them rewards... Behavior that is rewarded is behavior that will continue (p. 118)."

"A positive attitude is at the top of the list. No matter how smart or gifted a person is, it his or her attitude is not what it should be, it affects the entire team (p. 120)."

"An organization's most important asset is not its buildings, land, or holdings. It is the creative minds within that organization (p. 121)."

"Success is held in the hands of those who provide the solutions (p. 121)."

"Encourage and reward quality work instead of fast work that is mediocre (p. 123)."

"There are two kinds of egoists: those who admit it and the rest of us (p. 124)."

"Reward your people with the opportunity of further career education (p. 125)."

"How do I see myself? How do I see others? How do others see me? Our perspective determines how far our relationships will develop (p. 128)."

"The Good Samaritan was a social outcast--despised, ignored, and rejected by society. He knew what it was like to be passed by and uncared for, but he also had experienced the cure (p. 130)."

"The key to successful relationships really gets down to responsibility (p. 131)."

"It is important never to reward or give attention to moody people (p. 135)."

"Stay emotionally healthy yourself. Do not elevate people to positions of leadership in order to rescue them (p. 137)."

"Never reprimand while angry (p. 140)."

"Most of the time our relational problems stem from the fact that we ourselves have problems or issues that haven't been resolved (p. 141)."

"'Criticism is something you can avoid easily by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing' (p. 145)."

"Don't take yourself too seriously. If you can develop the ability to laugh at yourself, you will be much more relaxed when given or giving criticism... We are approved by God; we don't have to win the approval of others and look good in their eyes (p. 147)."

"It is possible to confront without ruining a relationship, but use caution (p. 153)."

"Petty criticism is the mark of a small mind (p. 154)."

"Don't compare one person with another. Deal with people on an individual basis (p. 155)."

"People need to see what they ought to be (p. 161)."

"'Your children pay more attention to what you do than what you say' (Zig Ziglar, p. 162)."

"Anticipate they will do their best (p. 164)."

"Accept your personal responsibility (p. 164)."

"Help others be successful. Develop confidence in others by helping them experience success (p. 168)."

"The key to consistent and dependable trust lies in the character of the person who leads (p. 170)."

"The second characteristic of winning teams is that they are risktakers (p. 176)."

"The third characteristic of winning teams is they continue to try harder (p. 179)."

"The fourth characteristic of a winning team is that each member cares about the success of every other member (p. 180)."

"Interests and values pretty much determine how and to what extent one uses his talents (p. 185)."

"Expect continued growth and departmental growth... The whole is more important than its parts... Learn how to influence people and develop people (p. 186)."

[Amanda · Rating 2 out of 5]

I generally try to avoid reading books with a smiling picture of the author on the cover, but randomly picking out an ebook from my library app tricked me into reading this. I thought the book would focus on general leadership skills which it did in early chapters, but it’s primarily focused on being an effective church leader which isn’t quite what I was after. The first chapter or two were good but then I became tired of the anecdotes that filled every page. The actual content is fairly light, so I’ll give it two stars.

[Jonathan Tomes · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are some great principles to think on and revisit. The author has an odd way of using Scripture to appeal to authority for his points. Often, the text doesn't have anything to do with what he is saying. Still, Maxwell knows a thing or two about leadership and it is worthwhile to pay attention.

[Cynthia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Cliched and trite. Couldn't finish it.

[Dave Courtney · Rating 3 out of 5]

And easy read, but yet full of great bits of wisdom that can transform how you look and deal with with and find success with the relationships around you. While the book is geared towards leaders, but at the same time anchors itself in the old adage that everyone is a leader in some capacity. The truth is much of what you will find in these pages can apply to our everyday interactions, although there certainly are a few chapters that dive more explicitly in to a defined leadership role that some may want to skim over.

As with all leadership books, the approach and the words must be put alongside the type and character of leadership that the author embodies. While John Maxwell speaks in a universal sense, there are methods and leanings that cater to his specific form of success. Truth needs to be balanced with the reality that there are different types of leaders to which different methods apply. That said, I think he keeps his words balanced enough and checked not only by his own personal learnings but by what others of different character types of taught him as well.

If there is an underlying theme that runs through the pages it would be the importance of encouragement in relationships. There is no hiding his passion for this art (and he does describe it as an art form). While encouragement requires creativity and risk, the bottom line is that without positive encouragement one cannot move forward in forming successful relationships. It is what forms trust and allows others to be led towards success. And that should be the primary motivation for each of us, is to see others succeed. That is what being a leader is all about, and it is what defines the nature of good relationships. It this the one character trait that separates accessible and attractive personalities from the rest, the desire and ability to positively encourage others around them.

If you don't find yourself in a specific leadership position you may find that there are better books to speak to your situation. One thing I should add as well, just as a personal opinion, is that the first half of this book is stronger than the bottom half. I found the most memorable parts packed in to the first few chapters which definitely hooked me in, and admittedly it loses some of the luster (and begins to focus more on business leadership) as you move through the final chapters. But as the book firmly believes, all of us have an opportunity to take a hold of leadership positions in our individual circumstance, and this is a good truth to remember. Figuring out who we are, what we are gifted at and who we can affect and impact with those gifts towards becoming all that they can be is something we can all aspire to. And the principle layed out in "Be a People Person" are some great principles to guide us towards becoming that. Whether you are leading a company, a Church, a small group of people, a family, a group of friends or an individual relationship, the concept remains the same... it's all about the person or the people and helping them succeed with who and where they are.

[Cornelia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Relațiile, fie cele profesionale, de amiciție sau familiale, joacă un rol important în viață fiecărei persoane. Fie că suntem extroverți sau introverți, sociabili sau nu, nu putem nega faptul că în fiecare zi din viață ne ciocnim de oameni, în mediul profesional, colegi, prieteni, cunoștinte, familie, chiar și persoana din fața tejghelei de la magazin. Dar cum ne raportam la cei din jur? Cum putem avea o influență în viețile celor din jur? Cum putem avea succes în afaceri și familie? Acestea sunt câteva din întrebările survolate de cartea Cum să fii popular/How to be a people person de John C. Maxwell.

Mie personal nu-mi plac cărțile în care mi se spune ce să fac, dar această carte mi se pare foarte utilă din mai multe motive: în primul rând, prezintă argumente foarte plauzibile și exemple- atât exemple biblice cât și din viața de zi cu zi-, în al doilea rând este centrată pe schimbarea atitudinii și prezentarea unor pași simpli care au success în relațiile cu oamenii. De asemenea, cartea este ușor de citit și te face să gândești. Îmi place că la sfârșitul fiecărui capitol este o mică sinteză cu ideile principale din el, dar și un mic exercițiu prin care îți iei angajamentul de a pune în practică principiile din capitol în 3 moduri.

Principiul cel mai simplu în relațiile cu oamenii este dezvoltarea calităților care ne atrag atunci când le întâlnim la alții. “Care este cheia stabilirii relațiilor cu ceilalți? Este de a te pune pe tine însuți în locul celorlalți și nu de a-i pune la locul lor.” În alte cuvinte, zicala din popor Ce ție nu-ți place, altuia nu-i face nu își pierde din actualitate.

Cei mai fericiți oameni sunt cei care și-au investit timpul în ceilalți. Cei mai nefericiți oameni sunt cei care se întreabă cum poate lumea să-i facă pe ei fericiți. Găsește lucrul în care ești bun, specializează-te în el, până devii tu însuți special.

[christianchicklit · Rating 3 out of 5]

John Maxwell is one of the leading authorities on how to be an effective leader. This book contains a wealth of great examples and anecdotes to help illustrate his principles, but I found most of the principles to be based on common sense (but nevertheless very good reminders).
• Treat others as you would want to be treated: encourage them, appreciate them, forgive them, listen to them, understand them.
• In life you’re either going to see people as your adversaries or your assets and that is how you will relate to them.
• Be more concerned about making others feel good about themselves than you are making them feel good about you…don’t try to sell other people on your, try to sell them on themselves.
• The charismatic person will risk getting out of his comfort zone in order to make others feel comfortable.
• Roadblocks to charisma are: pride, insecurity, moodiness, perfectionism, oversensitivity, negativism.
• Those who are powerful in leadership understand that one of the key tasks of management is to find ways to grow people.
• We motivate best from the other person’s perspective.
• Leadership is not a position that one is given. It is a position that one earns by proving faithful.
• When a leader stumbles, others fall.
•Etc.
A great review of all the things that are needed to be a great leader – especially the chapters on being an encourager, loving difficult people and how to be a person who can handle criticism.

I received a complimentary e-copy of this book from David C Cook in exchange for a fair and unbiased review.

[Alvir · Rating 3 out of 5]

“Be a People Person” is a good book to help train leaders on how to handle their relationships. John Maxwell dives into the character of a leader who is people-oriented. In this book, he teaches the reader how he can develop the same traits in their life.

I appreciate Maxwell’s approach to leadership. Although, his books often rehash some of the same ideas, his leadership philosophy is character based. That is, he does not spoon feed you a specific step-by-step approach, but rather delves into the roots of what makes an effective leadership.

What made the book so helpful to me, were the chapters where he wrote on dealing with difficult people and on how to handle criticism. He offers some practical approaches, that I will be referring to over and over again.

For those who are looking to read Maxwell’s “Be a People Person,” I would say it is worth the read. However, if you have read any of Maxwell’s previous works, be prepared to come across ideas that he has no doubt dealt with in his other books.

[Trent · Rating 5 out of 5]

Take Aways:

- Leaders have two important characteristics: they are going somewhere, and they are able to persuade other people to go with them.

- The key to greatness is to be in reality what we appear to be - Socrates

- Remember these truths: A person must soon forget himself to be long remembered. He must empty himself in others to discover a fuller self. He must lose himself to find himself. Forget yourselves into greatness. Empty yourself into adventure. Lose yourself into immortality.

- The measure of a leader is not in the number of people who serve him but the number of people he serves.

- Confidence in oneself is the cornerstone.

-The called leader tends to reproduce other called leaders.

-Self-Confidence carries a conviction; it makes others believe in us.

-Don't try to sell other people on you, try to sell them on themselves.

-The best way to become a person that others are drawn to is to develop qualities that we are attracted to in others.

[Kenny · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a good book on getting started in working with and leading others.

Maxwell did an amazing job in covering a large amount of essential topics that beginners will find helpful, as well as providing references should one want to explore further. For the "more experienced" readers, these book is a great checklist/reminder on what makes a great leader, and these reminders will be beneficial throughout different seasons in life.

However, as I may have hinted in previous paragraph, some of the topics are a bit too shallow. For readers who have read different literature on people in the past (How To Talk So Kids Will Listen, How To Win Friends & Influence People), while the book would be a good reminder, you may not find its content useful to help you grow further. You may want to check out the books mentioned by Maxwell at the end of each chapter if you're interested in the topic.

[D. Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Go beyond the "be good, do good work" mantras to get to the real meat and potatoes of what makes someone a highly sought out individual.

There are books on how to be influential individuals. This great book by leadership guru John C Maxwell takes that to a whole new level.

Regardless of whether you identify yourself as an introvert or extrovert, Be A People Person insights work for people in every personality type and social background.

Great insights for leaders and managers of all types, as well as anyone looking to improve your relationship-building capacities in social and civic capacities.

[Bob Pollock · Rating 5 out of 5]

John Maxwell is one of a handful of authors who know how to develop a concept and give you practical application for daily use. This book is no exception.

I had read this book five or six years ago, but decided to pick it up, again. It still remains relevant.

When I read a business or personal development book I usually hope to get one concept which I'll use forever. With Maxwell's books, I get several.

Maxwell ranks among the greats like Stephen Covey, Peter Drucker, Dale Carnegie, and Orrin Woodward.

This book is a MUST READ!

[Majuchan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Leadership is about other people.

I rarely read non-fiction books, but I really enjoyed reading this one.

Maxwell gives leadership advices through building positive relationships with people. The book’s approach is easy to understand and uncomplicated to apply in our daily life.

It teaches readers how to value other people by encouraging, respecting, trusting and bringing the best to other people. It also guides in understanding difficult people.

A perfect book for someone uninterested with other people. Maxwell imparts ways to develop your interest about others.

[L.S. · Rating 3 out of 5]

John Maxwell este cunoscut in lumea evanghelica pentru abilitatile sale de oratorie si leadership. Titlul in romana are aceasta forma probabil din ratiuni de marketing, titlul original fiind Be a people person (Cum sa fii la dispozitia oamenilor). Traducerea este importanta deoarece strategii de leadership sunt prezentate dintr-o perspetiva crestina fara ca aceasta carte sa fie una de nisa evanghelica.

[Ayu Prameswary · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bagi yang membaca versi terjemahannya seperti saya, ada dua pilihan:

Fokus pada maksud dan tujuan John C. Maxwell menulis buku ini. Artinya kamu harus benar-benar fokus sehingga tidak sempat memperhatikan hasil terjemahan yang bisa membuatmu merobek-robek halaman-halaman yang tengah kamu baca ini.

atau

simpan di sudut yang tak terlihat atau letakkan dengan baik dalam kotak berisikan barang-barang yang sudah tidak terpakai, lalu pergilah ke toko buku dan beli english version saja.

sekian :)

[Heather Denigan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good, basic principles (you know, the kind you need CONTINUOUS help to remember!) soundly applied. Someone once said that simple principles when applied become profound. Maxwell does that here. He seems to address pastors more particularly in this book than in "Developing the Leader Within You;" taking note of the lessons here, combined with sound Christian doctrine, ought to make for an effective minister, shepherd, and servant in God's kingdom. Good stuff for parents too.

[Erik P. · Rating 4 out of 5]

A solid book

All very helpful but he seemed to meander from his theme a little. I appreciate the character advice very much, however, I think he missed the opportunity to clearly explain how engendering these traits and skills will help you "Be a People Person." As I think about it, his theme of self improvement and treating others well seems to be consistent. Maybe the book was just mistitled.

(He Maxwell does love his lists doesn't he?!)

[Nyakallo Lephoto · Rating 4 out of 5]

Be a People Person is another of John C Maxwell's leadership books. In this volume he concentrates in being a leader that has the people on her side.

He takes you in a step by step journey on how to be a person people willingly choose to associate with and easily follow.

Ideal read for anyone wanting to their develop confidence and learn to influence others.

Download Book Review in Sesotho https://www.datafilehost.com/d/49494d33 8/10

[Kevin Spear]

This book did an outstanding job of showing how your attitudes towards others can help or hinder your goals. It starts with how you can be a someone likes and respects, then how to deal with people around you. I would recommend it to anyone who wants a well-rounded strategy on working with those we come into contact with every day.

[Tracey · Rating 3 out of 5]

All very good information. My biggest challenge with this book is that it was clearly written before my intellectual time. His stories and examples are interesting but it isn't until he actually explains afterwards that I understand the point he was trying to make. The people and events he refers to have no meaning for me. I did like the book however and took notes to look back on.

[Martha · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book would be a good read for someone who is challenged with dealing with or getting along with other people. It shares basic concepts that help build better working relationships and increase communication. Since I have read so many of Maxwell's books, it was a good reminder of these skills, but did not keep my total interest like some of his other books.

[Gracielle Balantakbo · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's a very short book but it took me some time to finish when I could have easily breezed through a 500-page fiction novel in a single day. I guess because of all the years I've spent reading fiction, my thoughts tend to drift away when my imagination is not being stretched. Still, I learned a lot from this book and I hope to apply them in life.

[Marc Daly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Still a Great Read for Leaders and Those Looking to be Leaders

While published in 1989, this book contains timeless leadership truths. Maxwell provides clear, instructive ways to grow and lead. Additionally, each chapter includes an opportunity to reflect on how you will apply the principles taught.

[Komi · Rating 3 out of 5]

John Maxwell does a good job describing ways for us, as individuals, to become a people person. It gives principles at the end of each chapter to apply to your daily lives. The one reason I gave it a three instead of a 4 or 5 stars is because there is just too many stories mixed within the directions of principles.

[Elise Zen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Book I read for work- honestly really good. Great insights on how to be a better leader and put others first. Gave good biblical examples of how Jesus led and servant leadership. Also great truths about how to reward people in the workplace and why the people you work for should actually care and develop you.

[AyЯa Acuña · Rating 2 out of 5]

The first few chapters really got me hooked so I was sort of disappointed when I lost interest at the middle part to the end. Basically, the things this book is teaching us is something that not only the people person does. It's what every good leader does I reckon.