Dancing with Fireflies

by Clemens Carl Schoenebeck

Dancing with Fireflies is a story of our family living in the darkness and intermittent light of my mother's paranoid schizophrenia. It is about three brothers dancing to the hide-and-seek choreography demanded by my mother's voices in our own search for safety; A telling of my father's stubborn determination to keep his family together, trying to fix what can't be fixed; and the near-tragedy prevented by his three young boys when he reached his breaking point. My mother's own history is woven into this memoir, shedding light and perhaps some understanding of the darkness into which she was so often called; a frightening place she never asked to visit. Despite the veil of mental illness which surrounded my family, we had our moments of laughter and gratitude for those treasured moments when the sunshine, however briefly, illuminated us. We shared adventures that all families experience. The reader need not be a survivor of mental illness to appreciate our story. Most of all, this is a story of healing between me, the oldest son, and my mother---years after her death.

Genres: Nonfiction

316 pages, Kindle Edition

First published October 8, 2013

About the author

Although I was born in Boston, I really grew up in State College, PA. My father, who immigrated from Germany, worked as a machinist at the Penn State University. I was the oldest of three brothers, all of whom graduated from State College High School, before moving on to Penn State. I then moved on the Tufts University School of Dental Medicine, graduating in 1962. After serving time in the Army, I returned to New England, where I practiced my dental profession for about 40 years. Shortly after the birth of my first granddaughter, I was inspired to write poetry. I've had many poems published in various poetry journals. Three of the poems were nominated for the Pushcart Prize. Eventually I was invited to join a short story writer's group. This opened the door for the writing and publishing of my memoir, Dancing with Fireflies.
Today my wife and I live in Swampscott, MA. My daughter lives nearby with her family, including my two granddaughters who can charm me into buying lunch on a moment's notice.

Reviews

[Briar's Reviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dancing with Fireflies by Clemens Carl Schoenebeck

This memoir is a beautiful retelling of the author's life - specifically how it was to live with a mother with schizophrenia.

Mental Illness is a big part of today's society - mainly because people have finally accepted that mental health is a big issue, bigger than people ever realized. Reading a book that is a biography about mental illness and how it was in the past was truly a beautiful experience for me. This book was beautifully written and unlike some biographies seemed brutally honest. It didn't sugarcoat this man's life - it was an honest retelling, and I truly respect that.

The descriptions of Clemens's family as well as his Mother's illness and hallucinations was incredible. It spread some light on a mental illness that I have no relation to - I never understood it (apart from a man with schizophrenia coming into my Grade 11 Health class to explain what it was), and this book really helped me better grasp what it actually is (not what soap operas tend to tell us).

There is many layers to novel - of course there are sad times, but there is also joy and humor at different parts. This man is not asking for sympathy or trying to make you cry, he's opening your horizons to a new experience and life experiences many might not have seen or understood before. It's also written so anyone can pick this book up. You don't need to have a doctorate, you don't need to only read YA - it's made for anyone and everyone (adult/YA age groups of course, not for children but it's definitely a PG story).

I also appreciated the pictures that went along with this story. It helped you connect deeper with Clemens and his story - there's pictures of people with faces and emotions. It's truly beautiful.

Overall, this is a motivational and inspirational book for me. It shows someone else's life and gives you a sense of empathy - you can understand how having a mother with schizophrenia would be hard, but that was still Clemens's Mother. She was a real woman in this real world.

Five out of five stars.

I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a beautifully written memoir about a young boy dealing with his mother's mental illness and the effect of her illness and hallucinations on her family. The author takes an honest look at his life and his family in this powerfully written story about his boyhood. The poetic language and vivid imagery made this story come to life. I highly recommend this book. It brought tears to my eyes; not because of the sadness of the story, but because of the joy, beauty and humor that the author found in his childhood despite the challenges that he and his family faced.

[Ginger · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a wonderful memoir which is difficult to put down. I read it in two days and continued to think about it for two weeks. Truly a must read

[Glenn · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author spoke at my Rotary Club meeting a couple of weeks ago and I was so taken not only by the nature of the story he summarized but by his fluid, lyrical presentation that I immediately downloaded his book, and just finished it. In my work I am often called upon to defend people with schizophrenia. Dr. Schoenebeck described his book as a memoir about what it was like growing up in a family with a schizophrenic Mother. Because of my work, I thought this topic would interest me. But this book turned out to be so much more.

This was a heartfelt rendering of a life, defined in many ways by a sick Mother, but more definitively molded by a loving, resilient, and strong family. This book was very personal. I could feel the expiation exuding from the author's guts as he described the bad times and good times of his childhood, and ultimately of his, and his brothers' role reversals as their parents aged.

This book teaches by example to forgive...to love...to be kind...never to give up. These were and are real people and the strength of character to which they clung was an inspiration. Thank you, Dr. Schoenebeck, for sharing your story.

[Linda · Rating 5 out of 5]

This memoir really got under my skin. Although simply written, Schoenebeck has a way of putting words together that are lyrical and vivid. He tells of his life experience in a way that made me feel I was there. His description of his final mile race as a high school senior gave me goosebumps. I look forward to the opportunity to meet the author when he visits my book group when we discuss his book.

[Thea · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book starts out explaining in detail pictures that have been included. Almost as if the writer is trying to gather himself for the pages to come. At chapter six the book takes a turn the writer opens up and his childhood is pored out before you. Mental illness does not just affect one person it affects the entire family.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really really enjoyed this powerful memoir about a boy growing up with a mother with schizophrenia. It really was about how the family coped with and lived with her illness. There were funny sections and heart wrenching ones but what you were left with was hope. The author came to our book group! What a gift! Please read this book!

[Marcia · Rating 3 out of 5]

The first and last part of this book I found held my interest. The middle seemed to drag on. At times the writing was sensitively descriptive, at other times plain and dull. I do give the author kudos for his introspection and ability to share his emotions and past.

[Jackie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was so meaningful, I will never forget it. I felt like I was right there reliving his childhood with him. Well done!

[Kathleen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phenomenal writing. Tender storytelling. Wonderful father he had. I loved everything about this book and author!

[Laura · Rating 2 out of 5]

I feel like this book had very little to do with schizophrenia. It was disappointing

[Connie · Rating 5 out of 5]

FTC Disclosure: I received this book free from Goodreads hoping I would review it.