A celebration of America’s Oldest Teenager, spanning over 75 years of mayhem, mischief, music, and no small amount of hormones (sorry, they don’t have an appropriate m-word for that one).
Outside of the show Riverdale, which I don’t watch, I have zero idea where Archie exists in the cultural zeitgeist these days. For me, however, these stories literally taught me to read growing up and were an important stepping stone on my literary journey.
This book is a weird curation of stories from the incredibly varied Archie history and it says something about their prolific output that I had read some of these before, but a lot were brand new to me (that said, if I never read the first Archie comic ever again I’ll be just fine).
In addition to a wide assortment of core Archie comics, you get tons of side characters of variable fame. In addition to such luminaries as Sabrina and Josie & the Pussycats, you also get offerings from That Wilkin Boy, Li’l Jinx, and (shudder) Super Duck.
As a cross-section of history or as an Archie primer, it’s pretty good, but man is the quality woefully uneven when you dig into the stories proper. It also feels a little cheap that a lot of the story intros are cribbed from the Archie Americana series or similar places.
And some of the decisions they make are strange... both the Li’l Jinx and Little Archie stories featured are atypical of the most familiar art styles used for those characters. Katy Keene is only present as a series of pin-ups (arguably the most enduring feature of the character, to be fair). They highlight the brilliantly inventive Jughead’s Dipsy Doodles, but reprint the original comics before the feature really hit its stride.
In terms of good stories, there are quite a few strong entries. They wisely add the first issue of Mark Waid’s recent Archie reboot, which nearly earns this collection a bonus star on its own - it is one of the best issue #1’s I’ve ever read and the tone is perfect (I’ll likely be reviewing that series in the future). There’s a great nod to the newspaper strips that showcases Archie at his best tormenting Mr. Lodge (the capper to this one made me laugh very hard) and both Sabrina entries (especially the second one) are solid.
I was also pleased to see the immortal Archie and Jughead ‘Stomp Fritter’ story, which is absolutely ludicrous, but Jughead’s deliberate mispronunciation of France as “Frence” to make a song lyric work has been making me laugh every single time for over thirty years. Adam Hughes’ Betty & Veronica comic is also very, very good - it has some wickedly sharp dialogue (although it and a bunch of the more recent comics are only represented by a sample chapter at most... seriously, don’t put ads in your collection).
On the downside, for as good as Archie’s current output has been, I can safely say their late 80s/90s stuff is mostly a fresh coat of paint over old jokes. The Archie 3000 story (despite a welcome appearance by Mr. Svenson) is the hoariest cliche of ‘non-genius student mistaken as genius’, which... no... and the story about Jughead’s baby sister drowns in its own saccharine nature.
I would also be remiss if I did not single out the bog awful Josie and the Pussycats story from the 80s, included to show them updated for a then-current punk rock look. That’s fine, but the story proper is SO incredibly bad and just involves them in an “adventure” where they stand around until their lives are in danger (which they never realize) and they get saved by Deus ex Melody.
Sidebar - they should have swapped in the mind-blowingly insane story from the 1970s where Josie is literally possessed by a demon from Hell and they end up performing an exorcism on her instead. It is absolutely hilarious because of how straight it is played. Also, Alexandra Cabot wielding a Bible despite her canonically being a witch.
The contrast between old and new Archie could have been better represented as well. They include a violently sexist story about the girls’ football team (nicely balanced by one about women’s lib when the book reaches the 70s, mercifully) and another where Archie literally gets spanked - even the book admits this one goes a bit far.
When we come to the more modern era, however, there’s zero representation for Chuck Clayton, one of the first African American characters I ever saw in comics and basically none for Kevin Keller, who’s a pretty important milestone in LGBQT representation in western comics. It feels like a huge miss.
I had a good time going down memory lane with these stories, but the stories themselves are only partially representative of the company at its best and, frequently, just head-scratchers because I know I’ve read better Archie comics in similar veins.
Bizarre choices aside, it was a fun read. As a cross-section of history it’s probably four stars, but if you actually read the included stories, their uneven nature really drags it down to a three.