How to Lose a Best Friend

by Jordan K. Casomar

When a teen expresses romantic interest in his best friend, her unexpected reaction sends their relationship into a tailspin in this heartfelt and honest novel giving a new look at first love—and outcomes that aren’t happily ever after.Zeke’s world is crashing down around him, but there’s one thing—or rather one person—keeping him afloat. Imogen. His ride or die. His day one homie. His best friend. The only thing that has kept him from asking Imogen out is her parent’s “no dating until sixteen” rule. Now with Imogen’s sixteenth birthday around the corner, Zeke can finally be her boyfriend. Only, Imogen doesn’t seem to be in tune the unspoken understanding Zeke thought they that in their will-they-won’t-they, they definitely would. Instead, Imogen starts going out with her crush, Trevor, and Zeke makes it his mission to show her she made the wrong choice. Meanwhile, Imogen has been thrown off-kilter by everyone’s reactions to her move in the game she didn’t know she was playing. Suddenly, she’s hit with accusations of leading Zeke on for years, and she doesn’t even have a best friend to lean on after finding out Zeke was always counting down the days until their friendship could turn romantic—shattering her trust. Tensions reach a boiling point at a disastrous party, and Zeke insists Imogen choose between him and Trevor. Torn between the easy option and following her heart, Imogen makes the only call she can…but is she prepared for the consequences?

Genres: Romance, Young Adult, Contemporary, Realistic Fiction, Audiobook

336 pages, Hardcover

First published September 10, 2024

Reviews

[Maren’s Reads · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5-5⭐️

[Rose · Rating 4 out of 5]

Initial reaction: Very strong 4 star read for me for a YA book that I'm glad I picked up upon release. This is not your typical romance story, and I'm actually glad to have picked it up. I don't think we get as many teen books where the characters who are "fated" to be together just because they're life-long friends actually end up at odds. Imogen is such a strong voice in this book and I loved her. I wanted to throttle Zeke and his behavior towards Gen, but it's satisfying to see his narrative arc and how he ends up coming to terms. Manny is probably one of my favorite side characters here as well, lol.

Full review: I let myself sit with my reaction for "How to Lose a Best Friend" and it still hits home with me for how well it treated this respective subject. Beyond glad that I had the chance to read it. Picked it up the day it released, on audio. This is the story of Imogen (Gen) and Zeke, alongside their wider friend group. They are best friends, are quite comfortable in their respective fandoms (Zeke loves X-Files, Gen loves books, writing, and Outlander). Gen is about to turn 16 and be avaliable to date. Zeke has been waiting a while to be able to tell Gen how he feels and make their relationship official.

Imogen could not be dreading that fact any more than she already is. Because she kissed Zeke for the first time since they were nine-years old, just to see if the spark was there...and nothing. All dread. Nothing like what she imagined being in love would be like. But it's her best friend, she loves Zeke - just NOT in that way.

There are so many layers of drama in this book that I found myself seated for all of it. At first I was nervous because I wondered "Is this book really going to go there? Will it actually take the leap and have the reader realize that these two are definitely not meant to be together and belong with other people? Examine the fallout?" To my pleasant surprise, it does. And it does not pull punches, so much of this book hurt to read/watch unfold. If I were ever around a person like Zeke doing some of the things that he did to Gen, I would be like "Boy bye, never want to see you again in my entire existence." It comes late in the book, but when Gen shoves him out of the house, it was so satisfying to watch considering everything he puts her through. The manipulations, the revenge playing, the blatant ignoring of her wishes. I won't spoil all that happens, but you know it's coming, it's just how and waiting for the other shoe to drop.

But being fair to Zeke, he's a teenager going through a number of different things and this narrative does show his reckoning with a number of terrible things he does (which I appreciated, it doesn't redeem what he did. He has to accept that fact and he does). Gen was one of my favorite characters in this, because I very much identified with her navigating really NOT wanting this respective relationship, making an effort to tell Zeke, feeling heartbroken when she can't and he keeps pushing the issue, and...well making decisions she probably shouldn't. She goes through a lot of fallout for what happens at her birthday party. The realistic way this shows what happens at the school and the isolation Gen feels is a gut-punch. I wanted to hug her so many times.

Manny, one of the side characters - best friend to Zeke and part of the same friend group as him and Gen, is my favorite character of the work. He was awesome. He provides a lot of comic relief in the book, but he's so much more than that and is a fully realized character in himself. My boy tries so hard to warn Zeke and be supportive to Gen at the same time, but you can tell the spaces where he gets caught between them and feels hurt. (And it feels true to his character the way he candidly points it out, lol.) Cara was also a realized character with her own feelings and friendship to Gen, though there are moments that friendship is tested in the fallout (and misunderstandings) that arise from the rift between Zeke and Gen.

I think really the only reason why this didn't get a full five stars from me is that the narrative draws out a little too long on some of the conflict, so much that you can feel it drag towards the final quarter of the book. I appreciated the ending for what it offered, because it does give closure and acceptance for the cast at large. Some of the references here are a little dated (possibly more than believable for some current teen readers who may not know them because of how long ago they released.). But I think that's forgivable considering some refs (like X-Files and Outlander) are intimate to the characters through their consistent use and you can tell Zeke and Gen are invested in their particular fandoms/hobbies. The narrative makes that clear for those big things, while others don't land as well.

I'm definitely tuned in to see what Casomar writes next. This is a strong debut novel - loved it.

Overall score: 4/5 stars.

[Lit_Vibrations · Rating 5 out of 5]

Special thanks to @mtvbooks & @simonteen for my gifted copy‼️

I fell so in love with this book it’s soooo cute and adorable. It’s a YA novel that will keep you engaged because Zeke had me laughing at his affection for Imogen. Not that it wasn’t cute but if doing to much was a person it would def be him. The boy was so in love and over the top with it. Imagine a guy applying all the right pressure to get your attention but he’s not the guy you want. I thought this was going to be a friends-to-lovers thing but it came with a twist because they almost went from friends-to-enemies.

Zeke and Imogen have been friends for so long that everyone around them thinks they’d make the perfect couple. With that extra pressure from friends and family Zeke thinks it’s only right to make Imogen his girl. But Imogen wasn’t sure if dating Zeke was something she wanted to do. So, she kissed him AGAIN confirming nothing’s there. But Zeke took that kiss to heart and was ready for marriage.

I loved everything about this book. The authors message posing the question can a guy and a girl be friends without catching feelings. In our MC’s case I would say yes and no lol Zeke proved that love will make you do some crazy things. The rumors, him being warned to fall back, Imogen’s 16th bday party, and what he said to her parents crossed a line that no real friend should but a childish boy madly in love would.

Overall, this was a great read highly recommend if you’re looking for something quick, cute, and fluffy but has messy drama. The author touched on themes involving a sick parent, financial struggles, entitlement, the complexity of teenage relationships, dealing with rejection, losing your virginity, first loves, and so much more. It was a must I add this to my top fav YA books of the year‼️

[Douvonté · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book needs to be read in middle and high schools. For real.

[D.T. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Won an ARC in a Goodreads Giveaway!

I really enjoyed how quickly the setting and characters were established. The friends are all distinctive and fun. Zeke and Imogen have been friends forever and are predicted to fall in love. But when that doesn’t happen Zeke shows his raw behind.

There’s entertainment value here, but it also relays a good principle/lesson without being preachy. The way entitlement is shown and built over time is exceptional. Also, the nword is used so often here that I thought they were New Yorkers. But they're from Chicago.

Anyway, the characters are such a highlight. Manny was absolutely hilarious and my favorite character here. If y'all would just listen to Manny, 75% of this story wouldn't exist.

There are dual povs from Zeke and Imogen, which had their own voices and uniqueness. Zeke does some grimy things but you can still tell at the core he’s not an evil person. We see how a lot of men contort themselves into thinking they are owed something for their kindness or assets. And how manosphere/red pill/incel BS makes teenage boys susceptible. The story even acknowledges how others can contribute to this downfall.

I loved Imogen's narrative voice; she's romantic and creative. A rare character in fiction who loved to journal and write, and I believed it. I used to fill up notebooks with stories and even romance scenes, so she felt undoubtedly relatable. The author even got the teenage girls affinity to reading books to fanfiction pipeline. Above all, I thought the teens sounded natural.

Anyway, read this! Zeke's entitlement may be a necessary evil to wade through, but the story's worth it. It was a joy to read, and I'll keep an eye on more stories from Casomar.

Ending spoiler: I'm glad Zeke didn't end up with Cara again, and she found someone else. Having boundaries is good! I was really thinking the story was going to show sometimes when you mess up with your friends this badly, you won't stay friends. It will be hi and bye only. That it's okay to forgive someone and end a friendship.

And that just because you apologize doesn't make things return to how they were.

But I figured the happy ending would allow them all to reconnect.

[Ahvital · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really good

[Sydney · Rating 1 out of 5]

Holy cow, how many swears can you fit in the first page?

The blurb on the back sounded interesting, but the book was a whole different story. I could barely make it through the first page, let alone even attempt to finish the book. This book was written about teens of color, and I, not being well versed in that type of living or speech, did not get it. I understand the want to be relatable to your target audience, but I didn't catch on. I could not handle the swearing, insults, mentions of inappropriate/unrelated topics.

Definitely a disappointing book to receive as a goodreads giveaway. I would not recommend this.

[Evin · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book really riled me up. It was tense from start to finish and I was a little stressed out.

The dialogue had a consistently high intensity (the teasing, the rambling, the banter, the arguing, etc) and pretty much everyone had the same speaking voice except for Imogen. In addition to the constant barrage of high stress situations, the book just lacked a dynamic act structure. It felt like it was dialed up to the max at all times and I was unsure where we we could go or if there was actually going to be an opportunity for character growth.

Zeke was awful, almost to the point where I found it unrealistic. He'd been the golden boy, accustomed to praise and always getting his way. He was stubborn, understandably, but he veered into delusional territory and I don't know what Casomar's intention was with this.

Imogen I didn't love either. Instead of confronting her problems she chose to ignore them, put other people in uncomfortable positions, and then when faced with the consequences of her actions she handled things poorly and didn't exactly take responsibility. When she finds out that Zeke is going to profess his love in front of everyone at her party, she asks Manny to talk him out of it and instead goes running around with her new boyfriend. She lets Zeke continue to put his effort and energy into something that she has no care or respect for, not that Zeke was in the right but Imogen knew what was coming and she let it happen. In the end we acknowledge that no one was blameless but this lesson could have been better emphasized instead of being delivered as an aside by Manny or as a fleeting thought in Imogen's internal monologue.

In the end, how did these characters grow? Imogen has known from the start that she didn't have feelings for Zeke, where does she go from here? She apologizes for her mistakes but that's not the same thing as character development. None of the characters really have an opportunity to demonstrate that they've matured. They're just going through the motions of responding to Zeke's terrible decisions, decisions made in the pursuit of what he wants above all else. His only real impetus for character development is the eventual realization that he can't have what he wants, beat into him by every single person around him on multiple occasions because it's so incredibly hard for him to get it through his thick skull. But how is this growth? What is our new normal?

I would give this book three stars for the concept. I appreciated the twist on a common trope, but the story was really lacking in execution. The characters were not differentiated enough, their motivations were singular and very little agency was demonstrated in the way of them, there was little to no growth displayed at the end that felt earned.

I was motivated enough to read to the end. I wanted to know what would happen. I'm rooting for Casomar, but what he has here is not a fully developed story but rather a single interesting idea.

[Iyana · Rating 4 out of 5]

this is an excellent book that addresses how young boys grapple with their feelings in the face of rejection. it’s clear sighted and nuanced without being punitive or treating Zeke as disposable.

and still I had to knock a star because as much as I love the space to allow boys to grow from their mistakes, Imogen’s experience doesn’t land the way I had hoped. I think in the face of angry boys, we need girls who get angry too. That doesn’t mean it needs to be a space they live in, or force them into a stereotype, but the fact that Imogen never outright expresses how hurt and angry she is about how badly Zeke treated her is frustrating. And though many of the points Zekes apology to her are accurate, that he never names that he was manipulative, that he tried to isolate her from loved ones, that he was cruel to someone he loves, is a pitfall. In a book that wants to tackles masculinity for young boys, naming wrong behavior is important and was a missed opportunity. But I still WHOLEHEARTEDLY want this book in classrooms, and in young people’s hands. it’s a deeply felt and sharp debut.

[Caitie · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.75 rounded up to 3 stars.

I liked the idea behind this one, but it did not really work for me. There was just something about the writing that didn't delve deeply enough for me...I wanted the two main characters to be more than cookie cutter. Zeke, the male lead, was incredibly entitled and believed he was smarter than the people around him. Which is why he believed that Imogen needed to be with him, and why tell her this at her birthday party when it's finally "okay," for her to date?!

I did not appreciate the fact that it seemed like people turn on Imogen without thinking about how she felt about this whole thing. I realize that teenagers don't think things through (yay for developing brains) but this was too much. I feel bad for both of the characters but no one seemed to question either of their actions.

[Tim Krause · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an enjoyable read that really articulated the difficulties and complexities of communicating how you feel about someone. While Zeke and Gen are teenagers, the lessons they learn are applicable well beyond adolescence.

The dialogue, side characters, and natural relationships between the main characters make the pages of this book fly by. It is quite tense; I found myself reading faster and faster as the party approaches, hoping that Zeke would eventually come to his senses. The consequences, and Zeke's core misinterpretation that Imogen owed him something, are realistically portrayed in the aftermath of the party. Zeke and Imogen (and their parents) both learn from the events in the first half, but their growth seems natural and not forced.

Very entertaining dialogue, Manny is the man! Looking forward to whatever Casomar will be serving up next.

[MG · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars rounded up. This was sort of an interesting take on the friends to lovers trope, scratch the lovers. It's definitely not a rom-com, though it is all about relationships and people's expectations regarding other people's relationships. I found it refreshing.

The characters were messy and (mostly) realistic. The dual perspective saved Zeke. Without it, I think he would've been completely unlikable. Imogen definitely fared better and I rooted for her throughout. This wasn't a happy book, but it was interesting and satisfying to read.

I read an ARC of this book from NetGalley. All comments are my own.

[Leigh's Novel Hour · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars
This was a fun book! It’s seems the theme for YA lately is crappy parents. I really appreciated the character development in this book. I think it’s really important to have stories that reckon with toxic masculinity and misogyny. This book is very much in conversation with Not so Pure and Simple by Lamar Giles.

While Imogene’s POV was useful I’m not sure it was entirely needed. I think her chapters could have been spent further developing Zeke’s character. But she offered interesting perspective. This book had a lot going on that didn’t feel fully fleshed out but it was still enjoyable all the same.

[Gwen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved the dual POV in this book. Seeing the 2 completely different conflicting sides made the story so much better and a lot more enjoyable. There is strong language at parts, but it is a book about teenagers so it's fitting! Coming from a female perspective, the POV from Imogen was really relatable and hit home about pressures with dating expectations in high school. This book did such a great job making the reader feel part of the story. I went through so many emotions reading this book, from laughing out loud to anger towards a character, and even sadness. I would give it 5 stars, but some parts seemed to drag on for longer than they needed to. But over all, I would recommend this book to anyone!!

[Ms. Nigeria Nigeria Parker · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was really cute, and not because I’m a Parker. lol Zeke is wrong for his lie to her parents. In this book I laughed and cried. My parents wanted me to date my best friend. I did, but it was.. we are better friends. But I didn't want to disappoint him or my parents. But I couldn't do it. He did a lot of crazy things after I left. So believe me when I say this book is relatable it is. I cried and laughed. But it reminded me to not do this to my son's. Lmao… Jordan we need at least one more book of these characters. Great job.

[Tara · Rating 4 out of 5]

notes I made for myself while reading:

Trevor just got the info dump of his life on his first day of school.

feeling very big inspiration from Friday night lights with the working at a froyo shop, the big shot athlete, the Panthers 👀

the itchy uncomfy feeling is palpable.

also Imogen saying "why should I have to do anything or say something when he's the one all bent out of shape" is a mood.

i literally had chills as Zeke started talking. I wanted to grab him by his ear and DRAG him into a conversation with Imogen.

Bless Manny.

dads who apologize!!!

[Kellylynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Totally engaging and easy read about teenagers with high expectations and learning how to trust each other. All of the characters were engaging and well developed. Zeke truly was a jerk and self centered. Imogen slowly learned how to stand up for herself. Plus Cara and Manny, the group dynamic was true to high school drama.

The hard part is the story did start to get a bit preachy about doing the right thing.

I won this in one of the giveaways.

[Joya · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 stars

I needed that boy to be humbled sooner, but also at the same time, it was so realistic. It just made me mad enough that I could not handle it. This would still be a good book for teens to read because it was so realistic and often I have found many boys to act in my own experience.

Just remember, nobody ever owes you anything (unless it is money/something they have borrowed from you).

[KeetonReads · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5-4 ⭐️
I liked the unexpected storyline a lot. The idea of best friends who were pressured to be on a path to love, but the path was not to be…that seemed fresh compared to many YA books with similar friendship-to-romance storylines. But after the turning point, the whole thing seemed rushed, for the main storyline with Zeke as well as the side stories (dad, baseball, Trevor)

Overall a good story with a different perspective

[Max Goldfine · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book let's you know each character personally, while also leaving a bit of mystery about them. This book also connects with many things middle and high schoolers go though. I recommend this book 100% because it touches memory's that have never been touched, and it also has you always wondering what happens next.

[Anna Sobotka · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5-4
Love that this ya romance did something a little different. Love that the "friendzone" and "don't give up on love" narratives were under serious scrutiny. Wish Manny wasn't such a trope (why don't best friends get rounded out?). Read it in a day and had a great time.

[gloria the moth :p · Rating 1 out of 5]

i really didn't like it. though i didn't exactly reach the end. the beginning was just a sign that it was not for me. the casual use of the n word made me a bit uncomfy, and i just don't like the idea of it, if i'm honest.

[Aυѕтιη]

rtk but like...y'all know you can read books not about you and survive the experience right? Even if the characters use language that's not in your vernacular?

juuuuust checking.

[Alyssa Rosesmith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cute story- great lesson. Would definitely recommend to some younger versions of me & my friends!!

[˗ˏˋ christie ♡ ˎˊ˗ · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5/5

[Skyler R · Rating 5 out of 5]

A book I wish I'd read as a young man, about navigating relationships that don't always take the shape you'd hoped for.

[Kellee Moye · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book made me feel SO MANY EMOTIONS. I got SO mad, you should have heard me venting to my library clerk. You know a book is good when you are gossiping about it like it is real life. It truly kept me reading–I had to know what was going to happen (and if it was going to make me more angry!).