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The Resilient Parent: Everyday Wisdom for Life with Your Exceptional Child
The Resilient Parent combines honesty, humility, and grit with humor and spirituality to offer practical pearls of wisdom for parents of children with special needs. Mantu Joshi, a father of children with neurobehavioral special needs, shares personal and authentic experiences to illustrate ways his fellow parents can find the resilience that is within them – resilience that is absolutely crucial when parenting complicated, behaviorally-challenged children. Drawing from spiritual practices that span the globe as well as from his training as a Methodist minister, Joshi offers slight shifts that create a new framework to view children’s behaviors. These short essays – most which can be read under 5 minutes – boost parents resiliency for a more balanced life. Parents of children with neurobehavioral special needs such as Autism, ADHD, FASD, learning disabilities, attachment problems, trauma, mental health diagnoses, developmental and intellectual disabilities, and others will find hope, solace, and solid strategies in this book.
- GenresParenting
166 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 7, 2014
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
May 16, 2014
Full disclosure that the author is my cousin, so a biased but proud ranking. A personal look by the adoptive father of two special needs children into learning how to cope. Structured as vignettes followed by questions and prompts, this book will help not only parents with special needs children, but parents who are single or overwhelmed in their daily roles. Joshi has a gift for rising above, and his background in ministry allows him to offer something of more depth than the usual platitudes.
August 1, 2014
Eleven years of parenting a child with ADHD and other special needs has gradually but persistently depleted my battery. Emptied my bucket. Worn away my resilience. I’ll spare you the details of my pitiful decline. Instead, picture me at the public library, searching the catalog for books on reviving one’s creative spirit. Getting one’s groove back. Regaining one’s resilience. And finding…nothing.
And then I hear about a new book, The Resilient Parent: Everyday Wisdom for Life with Your Exceptional Child, written by Mantu Joshi. I download it on my Kindle, and as I read, I cry. Joshi’s words touch me, massaging a tight knot of pain that I carry deep inside. This. This book. This is the book I’ve been looking for.
In a series of very short, accessible chapters, Joshi, a part-time minister, part-time writer, and full-time stay-at-home dad, presents slices of life with his three kids, two of whom have special needs (Nicole, 6, has sensory issues and ADHD “…with a leaning toward Oppositional Defiant Disorder.” Michael, 5, “…is on the verge of being diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder.”) The scenes he outlines are real and recognizable to parents like us, from the struggle to get out of the house on time in the morning, to the way fatigue, isolation, and living in a battle zone can turn a naturally optimistic person into anything but. Then, for each situation, he suggests how a simple shift in attitude or taking some small action can make a difference, for beleaguered parents as well as the whole family.
Here’s an example:
“I was hurting and sinking before I realized the simple truth: my happiness could not depend on my children getting better. In fact, even if they got worse, I needed a new capacity to be happy….Being happy has nothing to do with comfort or progress. It has everything to do with acceptance and peaceful living.
When we operate with these assumptions, we can accept ourselves and our children as they are. Acceptance takes off the pressure. At the same time, it gives us back the responsibility for our own spiritual care.”
This slim volume can be read from cover to cover in one sitting, one short chapter per day as one might read a book of affirmations, or opened to a random page when the need strikes. The coffee stained cover and dog-eared pages of my own copy reflect my ongoing fight to make life a little better for me and my family. With this book (and my daily dose of Paxil) I know I can do more than merely survive.
(A version of this review appears in the Summer 2014 issue of ADDitude magazine.)
And then I hear about a new book, The Resilient Parent: Everyday Wisdom for Life with Your Exceptional Child, written by Mantu Joshi. I download it on my Kindle, and as I read, I cry. Joshi’s words touch me, massaging a tight knot of pain that I carry deep inside. This. This book. This is the book I’ve been looking for.
In a series of very short, accessible chapters, Joshi, a part-time minister, part-time writer, and full-time stay-at-home dad, presents slices of life with his three kids, two of whom have special needs (Nicole, 6, has sensory issues and ADHD “…with a leaning toward Oppositional Defiant Disorder.” Michael, 5, “…is on the verge of being diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder.”) The scenes he outlines are real and recognizable to parents like us, from the struggle to get out of the house on time in the morning, to the way fatigue, isolation, and living in a battle zone can turn a naturally optimistic person into anything but. Then, for each situation, he suggests how a simple shift in attitude or taking some small action can make a difference, for beleaguered parents as well as the whole family.
Here’s an example:
“I was hurting and sinking before I realized the simple truth: my happiness could not depend on my children getting better. In fact, even if they got worse, I needed a new capacity to be happy….Being happy has nothing to do with comfort or progress. It has everything to do with acceptance and peaceful living.
When we operate with these assumptions, we can accept ourselves and our children as they are. Acceptance takes off the pressure. At the same time, it gives us back the responsibility for our own spiritual care.”
This slim volume can be read from cover to cover in one sitting, one short chapter per day as one might read a book of affirmations, or opened to a random page when the need strikes. The coffee stained cover and dog-eared pages of my own copy reflect my ongoing fight to make life a little better for me and my family. With this book (and my daily dose of Paxil) I know I can do more than merely survive.
(A version of this review appears in the Summer 2014 issue of ADDitude magazine.)
February 22, 2014
The Resilient Parent provides optimism and real-world ways to find joy within a parenthood troubled by a child's special needs. Joshi's optimism and ability to find moments of joy within madness is a real gift. Yet, he is genuine and forthcoming with his frustration and struggles as well. This book was like a light that cut through the darkness of some really troubling times with my son with ADHD. I dog-eared many pages to come back to in trying times, to be reminded that there can be joy, even then.
April 24, 2018
I love the way it is written in snippets so busy parents can come back to it if necessary. However- I could NOT put this book down! I go back to it often for reminders.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 1, 2017
I recommend "The Resilient Parent" by Mantu Joshi, highly to everyone. The book gives insight on how to transform one's own-self. It is like a daily devotional reading to remind ourselves to spend each day by applying certain basic principles in our lives. Thanks, Mantu!
February 23, 2017
Using snippets from his life with 2 special needs children, the author give advice on how to cope. It is well written. We were given peeks into his life, but I wish that more was written about it so that we could see how all the pieces and advice fits together.
August 1, 2014
I always think of resilience like a rubber band ball. A single rubber band can get stretched to breaking, can get old and weathered and frail, or can be damaged and become useless. But if all the bands are wrapped together then it creates real resilience. Each strand is a different element - wisdom, love, emotion, drive, determination, doggedness - add them all together you get true resilience. As parents of kids with special needs, we can be the rubber band or we can be the ball! The Resilient Parent teaches you how to be the ball. The essays are deceptively simple. Each is a wonderful opportunity to meditate on parenting.
April 1, 2014
I really wanted to like this book on living with a special needs child, but I found it overly simplistic and vaguely irritating
October 4, 2015
A pretty good book with some good perspectives and ideas, I guess I was just hoping for more!
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews