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The Old Haunts
In spare, evocative prose, Allan Radcliffe tells a wistful coming-of-age story and paints a tender portrait of grief in all its complexities. Recently bereaved Jamie is staying at a rural steading in the heart of Scotland with his actor boyfriend Alex. The sudden loss of both of Jamie's parents hangs like a shadow over the trip. In his grief, Jamie finds himself sifting through bittersweet memories, from his working-class upbringing in Edinburgh to his bohemian twenties in London, with a growing awareness of his sexuality threaded through these formative years. In the present, when Alex is called away to an audition, Jamie can no longer avoid the pull of the haunted by an inescapable failure to share his full self with his parents, he must confront his unresolved feelings towards them. In spare, evocative prose, Allan Radcliffe tells a wistful coming-of-age story and paints a tender portrait of grief in all its complexities.
156 pages, Paperback
Published September 14, 2023
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January 17, 2026Source of book: NG
Relevant disclaimers: None
Please note: This review may not be reproduced or quoted, in whole or in part, without explicit consent from the author.
And remember: I am not here to judge your drag, I mean your book. Books are art and art is subjective. These are just my personal thoughts. They are not meant to be taken as broader commentary on the general quality of the work. Believe me, I have not enjoyed many an excellent book, and my individual lack of enjoyment has not made any of those books less excellent or (more relevantly) less successful.
***
This is absolutely stunning.
The Old Haunts is a careful exploration and grief identity, from the perspective of Jamie, a gay Scottish man, who has come for a week-long holiday in rural Scotland with his boyfriend Alex in order to process the death of both of his parents. The book moves between the present (the holiday, Jamie’s relationship with Alex, his slightly dissatisfying present as an art teacher) and the past (growing up working class with cautious parents who loved each other and loved him, but couldn’t understand him).
It’s a relatively slim volume, coming in about 150 pages, and hyper-focused on this specific moment of Jamie’s life, where the past and present have collided, demanding a painful re-evaluation of both. But, fuck me, if it isn’t fucking perfect. There isn’t a single word out of place. Every moment captured with the kind of precision that only comes from a context that acknowledges how inevitably moments fade and how some moments (like Jamie’s boyfriend meeting his parents) can never come to be. Yes, it’s a very quiet and introspective book--nothing per se happens--but, for me, it was profoundly, profoundly emotionally resonant. It did leave my crying by the end but in a gentle, almost cleansing way. Rather than the “I’m going to destroy you, okay?” approach that a lot of non-commercial queer books seem to be taking right now.
Insert my usual disclaimer about how books about queer pain have value. But I also think it’s important that we’re allowed to be more than our pain. And The Old Haunts is about love, as much as it is about pain. The pain of loving people who love you only because they don’t know the totality of you. But the way love can exist in the space between full understanding too:
I’ve read a few reviews which have felt this story doesn’t say anything “new” about its themes of love, grief, and identity. Obviously people can think whatever they like about books they’ve read. That’s fully their prerogative. But I think to come to that conclusion about These Old Haunts is to miss the depth and the specificity of the work. Maybe it’s just me, and I just have a bee in my bonnet--wouldn’t be the first time--but I feel queer and from a working class background is its own, often recognised identity category, within a more homogenised perception of queerness-in-general. I think, for me, The Old Haunts captures this in a way that made me feel really seen and spoken to. I’m not Scottish, of course, (and this is a book steeped in Scottishness, as much as it is steeped in working classness and queerness) but there is a cultural and linguistic blurring around the border. So many of Jamie’s memories feel close in some way to my own (”For tea, she’d made a lasagne. The appearance of any dish with a three-syllable name meant a special occasion”) and it led to some deep reflection, as it hit me kind of hard and out of nowhere that people like Jamie and me, queers who have gone on to blend relatively effectively into arty southern middle-classness, were made by, and now carry memories of, a world that, in a very real sense, no longer exists.
So yes. The Old Haunts means a lot to me. But even putting aside the personal dimension, I will absolutely die on the hill of it being one of the most exquisitely written books I’ve read for a long time. It’s not ornate, by any means. Very much the reverse, the prose is sparse but also striking (for example, there’s a brief mention of Alex’s stack of bracelets ‘hissing’ up and down his arm, which made me swoon with its sheer clarity). But, couple that with its emotional complexity and deceptively detailed character work, and it catapulted Radcliff straight onto my favourite author list.
And he didn’t even need to include a dragon.
Relevant disclaimers: None
Please note: This review may not be reproduced or quoted, in whole or in part, without explicit consent from the author.
And remember: I am not here to judge your drag, I mean your book. Books are art and art is subjective. These are just my personal thoughts. They are not meant to be taken as broader commentary on the general quality of the work. Believe me, I have not enjoyed many an excellent book, and my individual lack of enjoyment has not made any of those books less excellent or (more relevantly) less successful.
***
This is absolutely stunning.
The Old Haunts is a careful exploration and grief identity, from the perspective of Jamie, a gay Scottish man, who has come for a week-long holiday in rural Scotland with his boyfriend Alex in order to process the death of both of his parents. The book moves between the present (the holiday, Jamie’s relationship with Alex, his slightly dissatisfying present as an art teacher) and the past (growing up working class with cautious parents who loved each other and loved him, but couldn’t understand him).
It’s a relatively slim volume, coming in about 150 pages, and hyper-focused on this specific moment of Jamie’s life, where the past and present have collided, demanding a painful re-evaluation of both. But, fuck me, if it isn’t fucking perfect. There isn’t a single word out of place. Every moment captured with the kind of precision that only comes from a context that acknowledges how inevitably moments fade and how some moments (like Jamie’s boyfriend meeting his parents) can never come to be. Yes, it’s a very quiet and introspective book--nothing per se happens--but, for me, it was profoundly, profoundly emotionally resonant. It did leave my crying by the end but in a gentle, almost cleansing way. Rather than the “I’m going to destroy you, okay?” approach that a lot of non-commercial queer books seem to be taking right now.
Insert my usual disclaimer about how books about queer pain have value. But I also think it’s important that we’re allowed to be more than our pain. And The Old Haunts is about love, as much as it is about pain. The pain of loving people who love you only because they don’t know the totality of you. But the way love can exist in the space between full understanding too:
I love to look at Alex when he doesn’t know I’m there. I love him in profile; unawares, walking head down, eyes half-shut, smiling to himself about something he’s remembered. I love the bits of him he can’t see: the lively crown of hair, the nape of his neck. A label is sticking out of his collar, or the tail of his shirt has come untucked, exposing underwear and skin, and the sight just about breaks my heart.
I’ve read a few reviews which have felt this story doesn’t say anything “new” about its themes of love, grief, and identity. Obviously people can think whatever they like about books they’ve read. That’s fully their prerogative. But I think to come to that conclusion about These Old Haunts is to miss the depth and the specificity of the work. Maybe it’s just me, and I just have a bee in my bonnet--wouldn’t be the first time--but I feel queer and from a working class background is its own, often recognised identity category, within a more homogenised perception of queerness-in-general. I think, for me, The Old Haunts captures this in a way that made me feel really seen and spoken to. I’m not Scottish, of course, (and this is a book steeped in Scottishness, as much as it is steeped in working classness and queerness) but there is a cultural and linguistic blurring around the border. So many of Jamie’s memories feel close in some way to my own (”For tea, she’d made a lasagne. The appearance of any dish with a three-syllable name meant a special occasion”) and it led to some deep reflection, as it hit me kind of hard and out of nowhere that people like Jamie and me, queers who have gone on to blend relatively effectively into arty southern middle-classness, were made by, and now carry memories of, a world that, in a very real sense, no longer exists.
So yes. The Old Haunts means a lot to me. But even putting aside the personal dimension, I will absolutely die on the hill of it being one of the most exquisitely written books I’ve read for a long time. It’s not ornate, by any means. Very much the reverse, the prose is sparse but also striking (for example, there’s a brief mention of Alex’s stack of bracelets ‘hissing’ up and down his arm, which made me swoon with its sheer clarity). But, couple that with its emotional complexity and deceptively detailed character work, and it catapulted Radcliff straight onto my favourite author list.
And he didn’t even need to include a dragon.
October 30, 2023
2.5, rounded up.
This is a short, sweet, and I'd bet autobiographical debut novel about Jamie, a young man coming to grips with the sudden death of both parents, while navigating what is apparently his first serious gay relationship. London-based would-be artist Jamie and wannabe actor Alex travel to Scotland to the places Jamie grew up, and interspersed with this journey are flashbacks to his childhood and college years, coming to terms with his burgeoning sexuality and how that impacts his relationship with his parents.
Nothing terribly dramatic happens, and it's a road that has been well travelled down numerous times before in better novels. This lack of anything new or fresh to say about the coming out experience is why I can't rate it any higher - that, and the fact much of it seems over-written - like the author composed it with a thesaurus handy so that he could inject three or four adjectives, where one good one would have sufficed. Not great, not awful, and I probably won't remember much of it in a week's time.
This is a short, sweet, and I'd bet autobiographical debut novel about Jamie, a young man coming to grips with the sudden death of both parents, while navigating what is apparently his first serious gay relationship. London-based would-be artist Jamie and wannabe actor Alex travel to Scotland to the places Jamie grew up, and interspersed with this journey are flashbacks to his childhood and college years, coming to terms with his burgeoning sexuality and how that impacts his relationship with his parents.
Nothing terribly dramatic happens, and it's a road that has been well travelled down numerous times before in better novels. This lack of anything new or fresh to say about the coming out experience is why I can't rate it any higher - that, and the fact much of it seems over-written - like the author composed it with a thesaurus handy so that he could inject three or four adjectives, where one good one would have sufficed. Not great, not awful, and I probably won't remember much of it in a week's time.
December 27, 2023
Yay I loved getting wrecked by a little gay book! 🥲✌️ Really lovely writing, totally vibed with it from the start. Gimme the indie movie nowwwwww.
December 5, 2024
I was sent this earlier in the year in a parcel containing the 2024 McKitterick Prize shortlist. It’s been instructive to observe the variety just in that set of six (and so much the more in the novels I’m assessing for the longlist now). The short, titled chapters feel almost like linked flash stories that switch between the present day and scenes from art teacher Jamie’s past. Both of his parents having recently died, Jamie and his boyfriend, a mixed-race actor named Alex, get away to remote Scotland. His parents were older when they had him; growing up in the flat above their newsagent’s shop in Edinburgh, Jamie felt the generational gap meant they couldn’t quite understand him or his art. Uni in London was his chance to come out and make supportive friends, but being honest with his parents seemed a step too far. When Alex is called away for an audition, Jamie delves deeper into his memories. Kit, their host at the cottage, has her own story. Some lovely, low-key vignettes and passages (“A smell of soaked fruit. Christmas cake. My mother liked to be organised. She was here, alive, only yesterday.”), but overall a little too soft for the grief theme to truly pierce through.
Originally published on my blog, Bookish Beck.
Originally published on my blog, Bookish Beck.
March 18, 2024
What a glorious book. It is billed as fiction yet reads like the best of memoir/auto-fiction.
Jamie is our protagonist. He and his boyfriend Alex are in Scotland following the death of Jamie's mother, hot on the heels of his father's death. He is struggling and a series of episodes, past and present form a beautifully configured cut and paste picture of his relationship with his parents, the course of their lives and how he has been shaped.
For a sparsely written story, I felt Radcliffe squeezed meaning out of every sentence so fluidly. I found it an extraordinary insight into the weight of memory and re-appraisal from a distance.
Jamie is our protagonist. He and his boyfriend Alex are in Scotland following the death of Jamie's mother, hot on the heels of his father's death. He is struggling and a series of episodes, past and present form a beautifully configured cut and paste picture of his relationship with his parents, the course of their lives and how he has been shaped.
For a sparsely written story, I felt Radcliffe squeezed meaning out of every sentence so fluidly. I found it an extraordinary insight into the weight of memory and re-appraisal from a distance.
July 24, 2023
Well, this one took me by surprise. Jamie is spending a week away in rural Scotland with his boyfriend, Alex. After recently losing his parents, he starts to reflect on memories, and the narrative takes on a past and present structure that worked so well. The whole aching feeling of this book just resonated with me. I couldn't pick one fault with it. It's very well done, and just really lovely, too. I would definitely recommend it to anyone and everyone.
Big thanks to Fairlight Books for the gifted netgalley arc😊
Big thanks to Fairlight Books for the gifted netgalley arc😊
July 30, 2023
This story focuses on Jamie and his boyfriend Alex amongst a beautiful Scottish backdrop. Jamie has recently lost both his parents and he is not dealing with his grief and loss well. He reminisces through previous interactions from his childhood to his university life and how he was not completely honest with them regarding his feelings and sexuality and now it is too late to be his authentic self around them.
This story was really well written, moving almost seamlessly between past and present to bring us a storyline present day as well as poignant memories and the emptiness of loss that Jamie wasn’t ready to deal with.
The only negative I could find with this story is that it is only 91 pages and I could have swallowed a lot more of Jamie and Alex.
Thank you to NetGalley and Fairlight Moderns for an advanced copy of this story in exchange for an open and honest review.
This story was really well written, moving almost seamlessly between past and present to bring us a storyline present day as well as poignant memories and the emptiness of loss that Jamie wasn’t ready to deal with.
The only negative I could find with this story is that it is only 91 pages and I could have swallowed a lot more of Jamie and Alex.
Thank you to NetGalley and Fairlight Moderns for an advanced copy of this story in exchange for an open and honest review.
August 14, 2023
Received an arc from NetGalley, thanks!
Grief is like a violin, and Allan Radcliffe played on it with extreme delicacy. Unfortunately, my ears were deaf for it. It wasn't bad, rather quite charming, yet it didn't get to me like I wished.
Grief is like a violin, and Allan Radcliffe played on it with extreme delicacy. Unfortunately, my ears were deaf for it. It wasn't bad, rather quite charming, yet it didn't get to me like I wished.
February 19, 2024
I listened to the abridged version of this on BBC Radio 4. The book explores grief (after the death of the narrator's parents) and memories of childhood. The narrative cleverly takes on a past and present structure and that worked really well. I am tempted now to read the whole book as it was really lovely.
October 7, 2023
A well-written debut novel exploring themes of grief and memory. I wasn’t sure whether I was going to like this book at first, but after 80 pages or so found that I had become quite invested. The book has a lot more emotional depth than I had originally anticipated. There are some very touching moments as the main character recalls the memories of his upbringing and his late parents. The writing is sparse and elegant, but the dialogue between the two main characters, Jamie and Alex, was confusing at times. I agree with another reviewer who said jt was hard to figure out who was actually speaking. 3.5 stars rounded up.
August 9, 2023
•Coming of Age
•Bildungsroman
•Past and Present
•Twenties in London
•Grief and Resentment
•Loss of parents
•Edinburgh, Scotland
It has a lot of reminiscing memories. There are two main characters and they both have poignant back stories. They have opened their heart to each other. While losing one of the parent in early age and revisiting the memories of childhood and growing up. They have shared keen observations about life, people and unforgettable memories
Jamie and Alex know each other so well. They have grown up together. Jamie shares a poignant story of grandmother. Revisiting and reminiscing the memories have their own delight. And the sudden loss of both of Jamie’s parents and sudden turn of events. While Alex is an actor. The book is evocative, coming of age and filled with grief, resentment and confrontation. It’s not easy to open one’s heart, it takes a lot of time and effort to understand each other and go through their state of mind.
Thank you Netgalley
•Bildungsroman
•Past and Present
•Twenties in London
•Grief and Resentment
•Loss of parents
•Edinburgh, Scotland
It has a lot of reminiscing memories. There are two main characters and they both have poignant back stories. They have opened their heart to each other. While losing one of the parent in early age and revisiting the memories of childhood and growing up. They have shared keen observations about life, people and unforgettable memories
Jamie and Alex know each other so well. They have grown up together. Jamie shares a poignant story of grandmother. Revisiting and reminiscing the memories have their own delight. And the sudden loss of both of Jamie’s parents and sudden turn of events. While Alex is an actor. The book is evocative, coming of age and filled with grief, resentment and confrontation. It’s not easy to open one’s heart, it takes a lot of time and effort to understand each other and go through their state of mind.
Thank you Netgalley
August 2, 2023
Many thanks to the publisher for sending me an advanced reader copy of this book for review.
This book is really a series of short stories following Jamie, a young man on vacation with his newish boyfriend Alex. Jamie recently lost both of his parents in rather quick succession, and is struggling with the immense grief weighing him down. We spend time both with Jamie, Alex, and Kit (their AirBnB host), and in the past in the various memories Jamie has with his parents. In these memories, we get to learn about the complex, sometimes troubled yet kind people Jamie's parents were, and we grow to understand the deep feeling of loss Jamie has.
This story was sweet, it really was. But I feel like it was more of an attempt at endearment that didn't quite land. We got to spend a lot of intimate time with our small cast of characters, and I genuinely enjoyed learning more about them. I loved learning more about the complex relationship and love Jamie had for his parents. I appreciated Jamie and Alex's "new boyfriend" relationship, it was really well executed. And I loved Kit, their host who seemed so genuine and kind.
However, there were a few stylistic choices that I think interfered with my enjoyment of the book. Firstly, few characters really had a distinct voice. Kit and Jamie's father come to mind as very unique, but everyone else blended together in tone. While this isn't a huge deal, it became troublesome with the formatting of dialogue. You see, the author rarely included markers such as 'Jamie remarked' or 'Kit inquired' or 'Alex asked', opting instead to allow the context of the passage indicate who is speaking. But because most of the characters didn't have a distinct voice, I was often confused as to who exactly was saying what. It wasn't until the middle of the book that I realized that it was Alex who was actually a person of color and not Jamie, and it was Jamie's old house they were hoping to visit, not Alex's.
This was further complicated by the fact that the dialogue was so stilted and inauthentic, it felt like an entire book of people talking past each other. No one seemed to really be engaging in conversation, rather just speaking at whomever was in the room with them. There were other stylistic inclusions that I suppose were Jamie's thoughts appearing mid-passage, but they felt so out of place and lacking context, I felt that they took me out of the narrative, questioning "What does that mean? Where is that from? Why is that there?"
Lastly, and this is more of a funny observation, but it took me until the very end of this book to realize that Alex was not a vampire. Yes, really. In the first chapter (titled 'We don't drink beer'), Kit says to the boys "you two...need to get inside and get your beers in the fridge" with Alex's response being:
"'Oh, we don't brink... beer,' Alex said, flashing his fangs"
I had to end up looking up if 'fangs' was some UK slang term (I thought I was familiar with English slang until I read this book), and it doesn't seem to be. Was Alex flashing his... teeth... in response? Why would he do that? Why would they be referred to as fangs? Why was specific emphasis put on 'beer' implying that it was something else they drink? So bizarre it stuck with me for the rest of the book.
All in all, I found this to be okay. It was short, and it was sweet. I just wish some of those aspects had been polished up a bit more so I wasn't pulled out of the narrative as often. Otherwise, I think it would have really resonated with me.
This book is really a series of short stories following Jamie, a young man on vacation with his newish boyfriend Alex. Jamie recently lost both of his parents in rather quick succession, and is struggling with the immense grief weighing him down. We spend time both with Jamie, Alex, and Kit (their AirBnB host), and in the past in the various memories Jamie has with his parents. In these memories, we get to learn about the complex, sometimes troubled yet kind people Jamie's parents were, and we grow to understand the deep feeling of loss Jamie has.
This story was sweet, it really was. But I feel like it was more of an attempt at endearment that didn't quite land. We got to spend a lot of intimate time with our small cast of characters, and I genuinely enjoyed learning more about them. I loved learning more about the complex relationship and love Jamie had for his parents. I appreciated Jamie and Alex's "new boyfriend" relationship, it was really well executed. And I loved Kit, their host who seemed so genuine and kind.
However, there were a few stylistic choices that I think interfered with my enjoyment of the book. Firstly, few characters really had a distinct voice. Kit and Jamie's father come to mind as very unique, but everyone else blended together in tone. While this isn't a huge deal, it became troublesome with the formatting of dialogue. You see, the author rarely included markers such as 'Jamie remarked' or 'Kit inquired' or 'Alex asked', opting instead to allow the context of the passage indicate who is speaking. But because most of the characters didn't have a distinct voice, I was often confused as to who exactly was saying what. It wasn't until the middle of the book that I realized that it was Alex who was actually a person of color and not Jamie, and it was Jamie's old house they were hoping to visit, not Alex's.
This was further complicated by the fact that the dialogue was so stilted and inauthentic, it felt like an entire book of people talking past each other. No one seemed to really be engaging in conversation, rather just speaking at whomever was in the room with them. There were other stylistic inclusions that I suppose were Jamie's thoughts appearing mid-passage, but they felt so out of place and lacking context, I felt that they took me out of the narrative, questioning "What does that mean? Where is that from? Why is that there?"
Lastly, and this is more of a funny observation, but it took me until the very end of this book to realize that Alex was not a vampire. Yes, really. In the first chapter (titled 'We don't drink beer'), Kit says to the boys "you two...need to get inside and get your beers in the fridge" with Alex's response being:
"'Oh, we don't brink... beer,' Alex said, flashing his fangs"
I had to end up looking up if 'fangs' was some UK slang term (I thought I was familiar with English slang until I read this book), and it doesn't seem to be. Was Alex flashing his... teeth... in response? Why would he do that? Why would they be referred to as fangs? Why was specific emphasis put on 'beer' implying that it was something else they drink? So bizarre it stuck with me for the rest of the book.
All in all, I found this to be okay. It was short, and it was sweet. I just wish some of those aspects had been polished up a bit more so I wasn't pulled out of the narrative as often. Otherwise, I think it would have really resonated with me.
July 26, 2023
The Old Haunts tells its story in bits and pieces. We follow Jamie, who has recently lost both of his parents, as he spends a week in Scotland with his boyfriend, Alex. However, boiling the book down to this very small plot point does not do it justice. The real heart of the book comes from Jamie's memories of his parents, from his childhood to his young adult life to the very near past. It feels somehow like both a coming of age story and a story of grief and mourning at the same time.
This is a very short novel, but Radcliffe's prose is beautiful and pulls no punches. There are so many small yet poignant moments tucked into this one for the reader to really sit with.
Thank you to Fairlight Books and NetGalley for the arc!
This is a very short novel, but Radcliffe's prose is beautiful and pulls no punches. There are so many small yet poignant moments tucked into this one for the reader to really sit with.
Thank you to Fairlight Books and NetGalley for the arc!
Read
September 14, 2023I lost my mother in my late 20s and my father about a decade later, and the pain of losing the two people I was closest to for most of my life was devastating and crippling. I don’t think I realized how much Allan Radcliffe’s new novel, The Old Haunts is steeped in the protagonist’s memories of his parents and his grief after losing them both.
Radcliffe’s novel is centred on Jamie’s life after his most recent loss: his mother’s death after a car accident she’s involved in. But Jamie’s memories are written about so beautifully that it’s clear to see that Jamie’s small, three-person family is a stronger unit than he realizes. Jamie’s memories of his parents and his conversations about them with his boyfriend Alex and Kit the woman he’s renting a holiday home from are beautifully written and evoke such strong emotions in the reader that Jamie’s pain is palpable.
This dual timeline story is heartbreaking, but it is also full of hope, especially as Jamie makes the conscious decision to both revisit his hometown and “keep going”. Jamie finds solace in his relationship with Alex and his friendships and determines to return to his work as an artist in order to do justice to the memory of his mother and father.
I loved this story about an incredibly beautiful and healthy relationship that a son has with his parents. The story is an homage to parents who want only the best for their only child without spoiling them with material goods but rather with unconditional love and support. And with a large body of work being published about unhealthy parent/child relationships, this felt like a breath of fresh air!
If you’re a fan of reading about healthy familial and romantic love, healing after grief, or bildungsroman stories, then this might be for you!
*3.5
Many thanks to NetGalley and Fairlight Books for allowing me to read an ARC of Allan Radcliffe’s touching novel, The Old Haunts in exchange for an honest review.
Radcliffe’s novel is centred on Jamie’s life after his most recent loss: his mother’s death after a car accident she’s involved in. But Jamie’s memories are written about so beautifully that it’s clear to see that Jamie’s small, three-person family is a stronger unit than he realizes. Jamie’s memories of his parents and his conversations about them with his boyfriend Alex and Kit the woman he’s renting a holiday home from are beautifully written and evoke such strong emotions in the reader that Jamie’s pain is palpable.
This dual timeline story is heartbreaking, but it is also full of hope, especially as Jamie makes the conscious decision to both revisit his hometown and “keep going”. Jamie finds solace in his relationship with Alex and his friendships and determines to return to his work as an artist in order to do justice to the memory of his mother and father.
I loved this story about an incredibly beautiful and healthy relationship that a son has with his parents. The story is an homage to parents who want only the best for their only child without spoiling them with material goods but rather with unconditional love and support. And with a large body of work being published about unhealthy parent/child relationships, this felt like a breath of fresh air!
If you’re a fan of reading about healthy familial and romantic love, healing after grief, or bildungsroman stories, then this might be for you!
*3.5
Many thanks to NetGalley and Fairlight Books for allowing me to read an ARC of Allan Radcliffe’s touching novel, The Old Haunts in exchange for an honest review.
February 15, 2024
Audio book on BBC Sounds.
Jamie reflects on his parents' life after their death; how his grief makes him feel like a boy, alone; worrying he won't remember details he wants to hold on to; the way a smell or nostalgic place can take you right out of the present moment and back to a particular time and place in your life.
We also see how complex families can be, as Jamie reflects on how his parents handled his sexuality; decisions he's made with the sole aim of pleasing his parents.
This is such a thoughtful, beautiful book.
"What if I forget the shape of them?"
Jamie reflects on his parents' life after their death; how his grief makes him feel like a boy, alone; worrying he won't remember details he wants to hold on to; the way a smell or nostalgic place can take you right out of the present moment and back to a particular time and place in your life.
We also see how complex families can be, as Jamie reflects on how his parents handled his sexuality; decisions he's made with the sole aim of pleasing his parents.
This is such a thoughtful, beautiful book.
"What if I forget the shape of them?"
August 14, 2023
whew, that was tougher than i had expected. don’t get me wrong, the writing was beautiful and i liked it very much — but it made me a little anxious at times, and i even cried a little, which can be a good thing, but it all felt a little too cathartic for my current state of mind. still, it’s a pretty much fantastic book, and i would recommend it to those ready to tackle its main topics.
i received an arc of this book from netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
i received an arc of this book from netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
October 31, 2024
a lovely, quaint little novel about the grief of losing your parents and how they live on in your memories, with a little bit of navigating identity and relationships sprinkled in. the book has a sombre feeling all throughout, and there are some really touching moments. it didn't resonate with me completely, but maybe that's because i didn't let it, with the thoughts of losing my parents being too difficult to even consider or relate to
January 19, 2024
A coming of age and a coming out novel that does what it says on the tin . A Hansel and Gretel motif brings home the protagonist's orphan status as he seeks out family memories in the Scottish Highlands .
September 1, 2023
Having read some of the author’s beautiful short stories, this evocative novella fully lived up to my expectations for a character-driven, emotionally astute read. What I loved most was that the characters are allowed to grow and breathe and really lead the story, rather than relying on contrived situations or gimmicks to maintain interest. This means that it deals with big themes of memory, loss and coming to terms with the past, without being pretentious or clunky. That description could make it sound quite a heavy read - which it is emotionally at times - but it’s leavened with moments of humour and a humane approach to its characters that really carry it through.
August 20, 2023
Sometimes, when parents pass away, it can feel like your childhood has died along with them. For queer adults, whose childhoods, even when raised by loving parents, were often marked by secrets and shame, this double passing, the death of the chance to be a full and complete person in your parents’ eyes, can be a greater loss, a heavier burden, than expected. That is where this delightful novella starts, where childhood love, happiness, and regret become overwhelmed by a grief that is difficult to express. There isn’t a lot of plot, per se, its exactly what is promised in the blurb…. Our protagonist’s parents have died, his boyfriend arranges a holiday in the countryside to help take time to process his loss, and he tries to do just that, even as his boyfriend is called back to the city for work. But plot isn’t the point, nor is some revelatory, instantaneous catharsis. The novella has a real sense of place, the isolation of the country is reflected in the language and the tone, and it all fits together really well. There is a bit of a dreamlike quality, as we move back and forth between the present and memories of the past as well as stories of the past without clear delineation, not in an intentionally confusing way but in the way that a mind sunk in grief is living in more than one place at once. This novella is a portrait of grief and love, which is to say of life, with the twinge of that special melancholy of those looking at middle-age on the horizon while still tasting the lingering sweetness of youth. Real transformations are often the quiet ones, the ones that sneak up on us without announcing themselves, and this story shares what one of those may feel like.
All the secondary characters had enough details to let them feel grounded, like more than placeholders, and our protagonist felt rounded and complete, even though we experienced his whole life in snippets, which in some ways made him more of a mirror for the audience than a real person. It is hard to draw a reader in when presenting a subdued setting with uncomplicated prose without any strong plot to drive the narrative, when the central conflict has already happened and the story is all denouement, and yet this novella mostly succeeds. I was left wanting a little more, finishing the story and being satisfied but also feeling like I had heartstrings that were anticipating being plucked yet remained stilled and quiet. It is hard to say what or where I would have wanted more though, as this story is really well-balanced, felt compelling while I was in the middle of it, and feels complete. If you are in the mood for some light introspection and grappling with ideas of self and happiness through the lens of grief and loss there is a lot of comfort, though not necessarily answers, to be found in this cozy story.
I want to thank the author, the publisher Fairlight Books, and NetGalley, who provided a complimentary eARC for review. I am leaving this review voluntarily.
All the secondary characters had enough details to let them feel grounded, like more than placeholders, and our protagonist felt rounded and complete, even though we experienced his whole life in snippets, which in some ways made him more of a mirror for the audience than a real person. It is hard to draw a reader in when presenting a subdued setting with uncomplicated prose without any strong plot to drive the narrative, when the central conflict has already happened and the story is all denouement, and yet this novella mostly succeeds. I was left wanting a little more, finishing the story and being satisfied but also feeling like I had heartstrings that were anticipating being plucked yet remained stilled and quiet. It is hard to say what or where I would have wanted more though, as this story is really well-balanced, felt compelling while I was in the middle of it, and feels complete. If you are in the mood for some light introspection and grappling with ideas of self and happiness through the lens of grief and loss there is a lot of comfort, though not necessarily answers, to be found in this cozy story.
I want to thank the author, the publisher Fairlight Books, and NetGalley, who provided a complimentary eARC for review. I am leaving this review voluntarily.
August 7, 2023
allan radcliffe’s ‘the old haunts’ is a stunning debut that flicks between past and present to tell the story of recently bereaved jamie, as he embarks on a rural get-away with his actor boyfriend alex and reflects on his recent loss. in what becomes an intimate exploration of grief and queer identity, jamie reminisces on his early years in edinburgh and his twenty-somethings spent in london, and how his late parents interweaved through these memories.
radcliffe's prose is probably the most compelling element of 'the old haunts', purely because of how stunning it was. the author was able to convey the intimacy of jamie and alex's relationship, the intense grief associated with parental loss and the various settings - rural scotland, edinburgh in the 1990s and london - so beautifully. it is also rare to find narratives which can so seamlessly move between past and present, however radcliffe's prose was so seamless at weaving memories into jamie's present in rural scotland. unfortunately, whilst i found the prose in 'the old haunts' to overall be beautiful - this is genuinely where i believe radcliffe excels - there was some odd phrasing that i just couldn't get past. again, this is only for a small percentage of the novel, but i felt that some wording was questionable, such as referring to alex's teeth as 'fangs' early in the book.
admittedly, this novel did not have a great amount of plot, however, this is not something i usually find essential in fiction, and there didn't necessarily need to be excess plot points for this novel to work, as it was more character and theme focused story. perhaps this can attest to how much i enjoyed my reading experience of 'the old haunts', in that i wasn't ready for the story to end, but i do also have to comment on how underwhelming the ending was. it felt abrupt, as if the author didn't quite know where and how they wanted to finish jamie's story. this probably is my greatest complaint about 'the old haunts' because i felt that compared to the rest of the novel, the ending just fell short of my high expectations.
whilst i overall thought this was a really sweet novel that was able to effectively explore the central themes of grief and coming of age through beautiful prose, i am unable to say that 'the old haunts' was that special or memorable for me. i can see, though, that there will be a certain demographic who will perhaps be able to engage more deeply with this text. however, i am super excited to see tender queer fiction re-defining the scottish canon. it's what we all needed!
thank you NetGalley and Fairlight Books for providing this arc in exchange for an honest review!
radcliffe's prose is probably the most compelling element of 'the old haunts', purely because of how stunning it was. the author was able to convey the intimacy of jamie and alex's relationship, the intense grief associated with parental loss and the various settings - rural scotland, edinburgh in the 1990s and london - so beautifully. it is also rare to find narratives which can so seamlessly move between past and present, however radcliffe's prose was so seamless at weaving memories into jamie's present in rural scotland. unfortunately, whilst i found the prose in 'the old haunts' to overall be beautiful - this is genuinely where i believe radcliffe excels - there was some odd phrasing that i just couldn't get past. again, this is only for a small percentage of the novel, but i felt that some wording was questionable, such as referring to alex's teeth as 'fangs' early in the book.
admittedly, this novel did not have a great amount of plot, however, this is not something i usually find essential in fiction, and there didn't necessarily need to be excess plot points for this novel to work, as it was more character and theme focused story. perhaps this can attest to how much i enjoyed my reading experience of 'the old haunts', in that i wasn't ready for the story to end, but i do also have to comment on how underwhelming the ending was. it felt abrupt, as if the author didn't quite know where and how they wanted to finish jamie's story. this probably is my greatest complaint about 'the old haunts' because i felt that compared to the rest of the novel, the ending just fell short of my high expectations.
whilst i overall thought this was a really sweet novel that was able to effectively explore the central themes of grief and coming of age through beautiful prose, i am unable to say that 'the old haunts' was that special or memorable for me. i can see, though, that there will be a certain demographic who will perhaps be able to engage more deeply with this text. however, i am super excited to see tender queer fiction re-defining the scottish canon. it's what we all needed!
thank you NetGalley and Fairlight Books for providing this arc in exchange for an honest review!
October 7, 2024
The Old Haunts has made the long list for this year’s Saltire Society First Book Award and was shortlisted for the McKitterick Prize 2024 and this doesn’t surprise me in the least. It may be a slim volume at just over 150 pages but my goodness it’s so beautifully written.
On the face of it, it’s a simple enough story. Jamie has recently lost his mum and is finding her death very difficult to deal with. Away for a few days with his boyfriend Alex, memories bubble to the surface of his life growing up in Edinburgh and as a young man at art college in London discovering his sexuality. Yet there were so many sentences that just made me pause and reflect. With Jamie as the first person narrator throughout, we come to realise along with him that not all his memories are reliable. Not through intent but just because we all remember things differently and memories can be flawed. I don’t know if it was deliberate or not but I noticed that the place they were staying Aumrie, is a Scots words for a cupboard or room where you keep utensils or food, a pantry I suppose. This seemed to mirror the way that Jamie had stored up and tidied away all his memories over the years.
I was very moved by Jamie’s relationship with his parents both as a boy and man. His parents clearly loved him but didn’t really understand their sensitive boy. In turn, Jamie loved them but didn’t want to hurt and disappoint them. His world was so different from theirs. Allan Radcliffe writes so insightfully about Jamie’s guilt at not having shown his true self to his parents and to an extent having avoided seeing them so he didn’t have to be honest. It was particularly poignant reading about the small things which suddenly would bring back a memory and grief, something many readers will identify with.
The Old Haunts is an affecting and moving book. It’s cleverly titled too with the old haunts being a phrase for places you used to go as well as perhaps referring to the memories that haunt Jamie. I highly recommend this touching, beautifully crafted novel.
On the face of it, it’s a simple enough story. Jamie has recently lost his mum and is finding her death very difficult to deal with. Away for a few days with his boyfriend Alex, memories bubble to the surface of his life growing up in Edinburgh and as a young man at art college in London discovering his sexuality. Yet there were so many sentences that just made me pause and reflect. With Jamie as the first person narrator throughout, we come to realise along with him that not all his memories are reliable. Not through intent but just because we all remember things differently and memories can be flawed. I don’t know if it was deliberate or not but I noticed that the place they were staying Aumrie, is a Scots words for a cupboard or room where you keep utensils or food, a pantry I suppose. This seemed to mirror the way that Jamie had stored up and tidied away all his memories over the years.
I was very moved by Jamie’s relationship with his parents both as a boy and man. His parents clearly loved him but didn’t really understand their sensitive boy. In turn, Jamie loved them but didn’t want to hurt and disappoint them. His world was so different from theirs. Allan Radcliffe writes so insightfully about Jamie’s guilt at not having shown his true self to his parents and to an extent having avoided seeing them so he didn’t have to be honest. It was particularly poignant reading about the small things which suddenly would bring back a memory and grief, something many readers will identify with.
The Old Haunts is an affecting and moving book. It’s cleverly titled too with the old haunts being a phrase for places you used to go as well as perhaps referring to the memories that haunt Jamie. I highly recommend this touching, beautifully crafted novel.
September 28, 2023
Do you ever read a book that is short in length, and when you finish, you just sit there stunned and baffled that a slim volume just packed all of that into it and left you with so many feelings? This is where I am after finishing Allan Radcliffe's "The Old Haunts"
The story is coming of age story, but one of grief. We meet Jamie, whos parents are recently deceased, and his boyfriend Alex, in rural Scotland. The death of Jamies parents is so present, it envelopes the couple, and we are given the gift of sifting through Jamie's memories. What I can best describe as small bursts of present times and vignettes of the past.
Radcliffe's writing blew me away with such subtle details that brought a very realistic touch to the book. I won't give things away, but just by the mere mention of movement of characters was so impactful into showing the dynamic between them.
This isn't just a beautifully nuanced book about grieving the loss of a loved one, but also the loss of yourself, wonderfully expressing grief of not coming out and not being your true self. When the opportunity is gone, where are we left?
I feel like I am not doing this book justice here, so you know what to do...get a copy and read it!
The story is coming of age story, but one of grief. We meet Jamie, whos parents are recently deceased, and his boyfriend Alex, in rural Scotland. The death of Jamies parents is so present, it envelopes the couple, and we are given the gift of sifting through Jamie's memories. What I can best describe as small bursts of present times and vignettes of the past.
Radcliffe's writing blew me away with such subtle details that brought a very realistic touch to the book. I won't give things away, but just by the mere mention of movement of characters was so impactful into showing the dynamic between them.
This isn't just a beautifully nuanced book about grieving the loss of a loved one, but also the loss of yourself, wonderfully expressing grief of not coming out and not being your true self. When the opportunity is gone, where are we left?
I feel like I am not doing this book justice here, so you know what to do...get a copy and read it!
October 16, 2023
The Old Haunts by Allan Radcliffe 🌲
In this short but powerful novel, The Old Haunts tells a story in fragmented memories of our protagonist Jamie, who has recently lost both of his parents in a relatively short period of time. We open with Jamie visiting his homeland of Scotland with his boyfriend Alex after his parents death. Jamie begins to reflect on the impact the grief has taken on him by recounting memories of his parents and the impact they had on his life. This grief is coupled with Jamie's battle to accept his own sexuality as a young man and how this impacted his relationship with his parents. Jamie's memoires take you from his childhood to his recent memories and how his parents shaped much of his life.
The story is a quiet and realistic tale of a normal family and the profound effect our loved ones have on our life, Jamie has a good relationship with his parents throughout most of his life but like most of us wishes to become something more than them. The story is reflective and sometimes quite heartbreaking as it feels like an account of grief whilst also being a coming of age story. I also appreciated that, as someone with a Scottish background, the language used reflected the Scottish vernacular very well.
Thanks to Fairlight Books for this copy.
In this short but powerful novel, The Old Haunts tells a story in fragmented memories of our protagonist Jamie, who has recently lost both of his parents in a relatively short period of time. We open with Jamie visiting his homeland of Scotland with his boyfriend Alex after his parents death. Jamie begins to reflect on the impact the grief has taken on him by recounting memories of his parents and the impact they had on his life. This grief is coupled with Jamie's battle to accept his own sexuality as a young man and how this impacted his relationship with his parents. Jamie's memoires take you from his childhood to his recent memories and how his parents shaped much of his life.
The story is a quiet and realistic tale of a normal family and the profound effect our loved ones have on our life, Jamie has a good relationship with his parents throughout most of his life but like most of us wishes to become something more than them. The story is reflective and sometimes quite heartbreaking as it feels like an account of grief whilst also being a coming of age story. I also appreciated that, as someone with a Scottish background, the language used reflected the Scottish vernacular very well.
Thanks to Fairlight Books for this copy.
September 14, 2023
My thanks to NetGalley and Fairlight Books for an e-ARC of this novel.
Fairlight is a newish publisher out of Oxford, who will promote new young talent.
Jamie and his boyfriend Alex head off to Scotland for a week, hoping to help Jamie heal from the recent death of both of his beloved parents. The location they choose is a small town Jamie remembers going to with his parents when he was a child, staying at a white cottage they then search for in the area. The "old haunt".
The story of Jamie's youth, his relationship with his parents, and being an outsider (gay, a loner [safer that way!] and artistic, in the closet until college) is told in a series of flashbacks in this short novel. Well done dealing with all of these aspects throughout the book.
If a book about death and grief can be called "charming" this is it. Quick "pencil sketches" of his life in college and in his early 20's, but Radcliffe gets his point across.
Fairlight is a newish publisher out of Oxford, who will promote new young talent.
Jamie and his boyfriend Alex head off to Scotland for a week, hoping to help Jamie heal from the recent death of both of his beloved parents. The location they choose is a small town Jamie remembers going to with his parents when he was a child, staying at a white cottage they then search for in the area. The "old haunt".
The story of Jamie's youth, his relationship with his parents, and being an outsider (gay, a loner [safer that way!] and artistic, in the closet until college) is told in a series of flashbacks in this short novel. Well done dealing with all of these aspects throughout the book.
If a book about death and grief can be called "charming" this is it. Quick "pencil sketches" of his life in college and in his early 20's, but Radcliffe gets his point across.
February 9, 2024
'The only advantage of losing a parent at an early age is that you have less to forget'.
'I feel like I’ve something heavy in my head. A brick maybe. Make that a boulder. A fuck-off boulder. Rocks in my chest and stones in my throat. And they keep getting bigger and heavier. And the heaviness makes me feel tired and I wish they would just burst, breaking me open, letting my insides spill out onto your nice beige carpet. All that anger, all sadness gone. That would feel good, I think. I’d like that, sure. I’d feel… I’d feel light again'.
‘I love to look at Alex when he doesn’t know I’m there. I love him in profile; unawares, walking head down, eyes half-shut, smiling to himself about something he’s remembered. I love the bits of him he can’t see: the lively crown of hair, the nape of his neck. A label is sticking out of his collar, or the tail of his shirt has come untucked, exposing underwear and skin, and the sight just about breaks my heart’.
'I feel like I’ve something heavy in my head. A brick maybe. Make that a boulder. A fuck-off boulder. Rocks in my chest and stones in my throat. And they keep getting bigger and heavier. And the heaviness makes me feel tired and I wish they would just burst, breaking me open, letting my insides spill out onto your nice beige carpet. All that anger, all sadness gone. That would feel good, I think. I’d like that, sure. I’d feel… I’d feel light again'.
‘I love to look at Alex when he doesn’t know I’m there. I love him in profile; unawares, walking head down, eyes half-shut, smiling to himself about something he’s remembered. I love the bits of him he can’t see: the lively crown of hair, the nape of his neck. A label is sticking out of his collar, or the tail of his shirt has come untucked, exposing underwear and skin, and the sight just about breaks my heart’.
February 3, 2024
This was a quick, pleasant enough read. Good writing for sure - sparing and clear. I
was more interested in the landlady at the holiday rental, Kit, more than the main character, Alex. Her ready ease with her tenants, her humour and warmth was appealing. She was just what Alex needed really, a maternal stranger, to help him move through this stage of grief that he was experiencing. The setting on Loch Tay was lovingly drawn - anyone who has been knows what a stunning area it is. Equally so, the east end of Edinburgh, with its strong community ties. Places where it should be easy to belong, but how difficult it can be to really belong anywhere until you are truly at home in your own skin. Thoughtful.
was more interested in the landlady at the holiday rental, Kit, more than the main character, Alex. Her ready ease with her tenants, her humour and warmth was appealing. She was just what Alex needed really, a maternal stranger, to help him move through this stage of grief that he was experiencing. The setting on Loch Tay was lovingly drawn - anyone who has been knows what a stunning area it is. Equally so, the east end of Edinburgh, with its strong community ties. Places where it should be easy to belong, but how difficult it can be to really belong anywhere until you are truly at home in your own skin. Thoughtful.
February 27, 2024
*I received an ARC via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Thanks for the free book!*
"The Old Haunts" is a very touching queer coming of age story tackling grief and loss. Jamie's parents have died and while on a trip with his boyfriend Alex in Scotland, he's remembering growing up, remembering his parents, remembering hiding his sexuality from him. The book might not be to everyone's liking because it is not loud or flashy, it's quiet and poetic and ponders more than having a fast-paced plot. I enjoyed it though. It feels very real too, almost autobiographic but I of course have no idea if that is true (it also doesn't matter).
4 stars
"The Old Haunts" is a very touching queer coming of age story tackling grief and loss. Jamie's parents have died and while on a trip with his boyfriend Alex in Scotland, he's remembering growing up, remembering his parents, remembering hiding his sexuality from him. The book might not be to everyone's liking because it is not loud or flashy, it's quiet and poetic and ponders more than having a fast-paced plot. I enjoyed it though. It feels very real too, almost autobiographic but I of course have no idea if that is true (it also doesn't matter).
4 stars
August 30, 2023
Loved this collection of fabulously evocative memories, strung together to form a novel about a young Scottish man coming to terms with the loss of his parents, whilst also navigating a new relationship. The prose is haunting and provides a wonderful window into complex emotions without being sentimental or cloying. As Jamie explores his memories a picture emerges of his growing up as a sensitive young gay man trying to exist in a loud rough school and world.
With thanks to Netgalley and the Publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
With thanks to Netgalley and the Publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
September 24, 2023
A beautiful, tender short novel, set against the glorious backdrop of the wild Scottish landscape (which plays its part in setting the atmosphere). It's a slow-moving story of Jamie, coming to terms with the recent loss of both parents in short succession, and his actor boyfriend Alex. Full of the 'what if' questions we all ask ourselves at moments of loss, this is a quiet joy to read, full of emotional punch and wonderfully written. Short but powerful, this deserves to be read by anyone who cares about storytelling. 5 stars.
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