Y’All Ain’t Right: Southern Extreme Horror

by Edward Lee, Joe R Lansdale, Kasey Lansdale

Y’ALL AIN’T RIGHT is an anthology of Southern Extreme Horror stories featuring 17 of the best extreme horror authors in the genre. From gator infested swamps to the overgrown backwoods, be careful how far you venture off of the main road. And if you hear banjos… well, you better paddle faster!Featuring stories —Kasey Lansdale & Joe R. Lansdale—Edward Lee—Jeff Strand—Wrath James White—Kristopher Triana—Kristopher Rufty—Ryan Harding—Christine Morgan—Daniel J. Volpe—Bridgett Nelson—Gregory Norris—Candace Nola—Eric Butler—Douglas Ford—Lucas Milliron—Patrick R. McDonough

Genres: Horror, Fiction, Anthologies, Short Stories

193 pages, Paperback

First published February 6, 2024

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.

Edward Lee is an American novelist specializing in the field of horror, and has authored 40 books, more than half of which have been published by mass-market New York paperback companies such as Leisure/Dorchester, Berkley, and Zebra/Kensington. He is a Bram Stoker award nominee for his story "Mr. Torso," and his short stories have appeared in over a dozen mass-market anthologies, including THE BEST AMERICAN MYSTERY STORIES OF 2000, Pocket's HOT BLOOD series, and the award-wining 999. Several of his novels have sold translation rights to Germany, Greece, and Romania. He also publishes quite actively in the small-press/limited-edition hardcover market; many of his books in this category have become collector's items. While a number of Lee's projects have been optioned for film, only one has been made, HEADER, which was released on DVD to mixed reviews in June, 2009, by Synapse Films.

Lee is particularly known for over-the-top occult concepts and an accelerated treatment of erotic and/or morbid sexual imagery and visceral violence.

He was born on May 25, 1957 in Washington, D.C., and grew up in Bowie, Maryland. In the late-70s he served in the U.S. Army's 1st Armored Division, in Erlangen, West Germany, then, for a short time, was a municipal police officer in Cottage City, Maryland. Lee also attended the University of Maryland as an English major but quit in his last semester to pursue his dream of being a horror novelist. For over 15 years, he worked as the night manager for a security company in Annapolis, Maryland, while writing in his spare time. In 1997, however, he became a full-time writer, first spending several years in Seattle and then moving to St. Pete Beach, Florida, where he currently resides.

Of note, the author cites as his strongest influence horror legend H. P. Lovecraft; in 2007, Lee embarked on what he calls his "Lovecraft kick" and wrote a spate of novels and novellas which tribute Lovecraft and his famous Cthulhu Mythos. Among these projects are THE INNSWICH HORROR, "Trolley No. 1852," HAUNTER OF THE THRESHOLD, GOING MONSTERING, "Pages Torn From A Travel Journal," and "You Are My Everything." Lee promises more Lovecraftian work on the horizon.

Reviews

[Stitching Ghost · Rating 4 out of 5]

From absurdist horror to horror poetry this anthology offers a great example of just how large the scope of extreme horror can be. Yes, these tales are vile and gross but they're not JUST that.

If you have the sense of humor for it there's a handful of stories in there that are absolutely hilarious but there are some stories that have a lot more emotional impact.

[Hail Hydra! ~Dave Anderson~ · Rating 4 out of 5]

All three of us turned and looked. In the far back of the station wagon were three unconscious bodies, bound and gagged.

“You almost fucked it all up,” she explained as we turned on the dirt road heading through the woods towards our house.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, ya pieces of shit,” Maw said as she lit up a cigarette. “That there is your present.”

[The_5ft_reader · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent collection from some Excellent authors!

[Stefanie Duncan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fun and nasty lil’ Anthology. The author line-up is exquisit - Jeff Strand, Kristopher Rufty, Bridgett Nelson, Lucas Milliron, Edward Lee, Ryan Harding, Wrath James White, Christine Morgan, Eric Butler, Candace Nola, Daniel J Volpe, Kristopher Triana , and more..

I have it 4 Stars because a few short stories were meh however, Wrath James White story “Obama Lover” and “Kin” by Kristopher Triana were my favorites.

[Keli · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not expected

This book is a great horror/humour selection with some terrific stories! Wouldn't recommend it for young kids though. I hope there's another one in the wings - I'll be watching for it!

[Mtm66]

3.5

[Thomas Hobbs · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great stories of nasty and disturbing stuff to keep you up all night in this anthology by multiple authors.

[Liam Underwood · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’m continuing on with reading my way through both Aron Beauregard and Daniel J. Volpe’s bibliographies in publication order (as best as I can), and am slowly inching closer to their collaborative effort Sew Sorry, which is my next Volpe read although it is not my next Beauregard read. To ensure I keep getting hits of Volpe I have been turning to anthologies that he has contributed to, resulting in me reading Y’all Ain’t Right: A Reckoning of Southern Extreme Horror edited by K. Trap Jones. I’ve previously read Counting Bodies Like Sheep: An Extreme Horror Anthology which is also edited by Jones and published by Evil Cookie Publishing. Now, I was very pleasantly surprised by Counting Bodies Like Sheep , especially following the disappointment of Frightening Fables: An Anthology Compiled by Literati Publications so my hopes were high for these sixteen short stories (plus a bonus one). There’s also a couple of names here who are familiar to me (I have books of theirs sat on my shelves) but who I haven’t yet got around to checking out any of their work, so I was looking forward to getting to experience some of their writing.

The Moonshining – Jeff Strand
Y’all Ain’t Right quite quickly sets the tone and immediately unearths the biggest issue I had with this collection – a lot of these short stories rely on stereotypes and familiar tropes. I’ve previously read Twentieth Anniversary Screening by Jeff Strand, which I thought was okay, and I have to confess I thought The Moonshining was also only okay.

Sweet Pea – Kristopher Rufty
A little while ago I picked up a bunch of Kristopher Rufty’s books, but I haven’t gotten around to making a start with them yet (too many other reading projects on the go before I embark on a new one!) so I was excited to finally get to experience his writing. I enjoyed Sweet Pea – it’s a fun twisty tale that I feel would’ve benefitted from being allowed a little more room to breathe.

Cherrified – Bridgett Nelson
Reading like a literary mash-up of Jennifer’s Body (2009) and Teeth (2007), I quite enjoyed Cherrified. I also liked Nelson’s contribution to Counting Bodies Like Sheep , so was pleased to see her returning here.

Each of Us Sinners – Lucas Milliron
Milliron is another returning author from Counting Bodies Like Sheep , and whilst I liked his entry in that book, I must admit that Each of Us Sinners didn’t really work for me. At times I found the writing to lack clarity, and this short leans a little too heavily on tropes that, only four stories in, are already feeling tired. The ending didn’t really land for me either.

A Header Tale – Edward Lee
Lee is another returning author, although in Counting Bodies Like Sheep he teamed up with Roman Neznayu, so I was curious to see if this read any different. I really enjoyed the writing style here and I thought the reveal of exactly what A Header Tale actually means was delightful. I didn’t realise when reading this short that it is a companion piece to a book by Lee titled Header, which I am now quite curious to check out.

Toad Juice – Patrick R. McDonough
I really wanted to like Toad Juice. An extreme horror short written from the perspective of a dog? Sign me up! However, despite the concept being brilliant, I can’t say I was wild about the execution. The obvious comparison to make here is that this feels like an extreme Southern take on Cujo .

Genital Grinder 2.5 – Ryan Harding
This is now the second occasion where Y’all Ain’t Right has provided a short story that acts as a companion piece to another book, this time being Genital Grinder. If I had known this going in I would’ve preferred to have read those books before experiencing these companions, but alas, there was no indication. I thought this short was okay, but I do feel like it maybe would’ve worked better with previous familiarity to the characters.

Obama Lover – Wrath James White
White is another author who I have books by sat on my shelf that I just haven’t gotten around to reading yet, but Obama Lover has only amplified my curiosity. This stands in stark contrast to the other stories included here, as not only has White delivered a poem, but it also resists some of the more familiar tropes found throughout this book. It’s packed with barely contained rage that reads very effectively. A truly impressive short.

Yoofo – Christine Morgan
I’ll be honest, Morgan’s contribution to Counting Bodies Like Sheep was one of my least favourite entries in that book, so I was pleasantly surprised to find I didn’t mind Yoofo. I enjoyed the sense of humour here and I’ll admit that the reveal of the meaning of the title made me smile.

Welcome to Clifton, TX – Eric Butler
I like the concept of Welcome to Clifton, TX, but I couldn’t help but find myself wanting more. Butler doesn’t really give any explanation, so instead we’re left with a short sharp stab of horror, but not a lot of understanding as to why. Still, this is a fun entry, and I don’t think being left with wanting more is a bad thing.

Back Road – Candace Nola
Nola is another name I am familiar with but have yet to read anything by, so I was looking forward to reading Back Road. Thankfully, this doesn’t disappoint. I enjoyed the air of mystery here, and the depiction of the descent into depravity is very effective. Also really liked the sting at the end.

Good Grief, It’s the Ejaculantern! – Douglas Ford
I’m sorry but Good Grief, It’s the Ejaculantern! really didn’t work for me. Throughout the entirety of this short I kept being reminded of Hallowpeen: A Halloween Sentient Object Romance , which I think is better than this entry and that really isn’t saying much.

Kiki – Gregory L. Norris
I liked Kiki just fine, but I did find it to be a bit predictable. Norris’ writing is decent, I just think conceptually this doesn’t really do anything unexpected. It’s ultimately okay but nothing special.

Swamp Water Boogie – Daniel J. Volpe
I found Volpe’s contribution to Counting Bodies Like Sheep to be a little lacking in his signature style (potentially a side-effect from that entry being a collaborative effort with Dustin LaValley) but I can’t say the same for Swamp Water Boogie. This is much more aligned to the Volpe writing I know and love, combining sex and horror beautifully. This is a really really strong entry – surprisingly not my favourite, but definitely one of the better short stories included here.

Kin – Kristopher Triana
I’ve previously read Gone to See the River Man by Triana, and am very keen to read more of his work. Kin is, I think, my favourite of the short stories collected here. I thoroughly enjoyed this. A fantastic protagonist and a strong concept executed really well with a sting at the end that I did not see coming.

Tremble – Kasey Lansdale & Joe R. Lansdale
Both Kin and Tremble are two of the longest entries collected here, and I think both benefit from the additional pages to allow the story and characters space to breathe. This is another decent short, but it does lack bite.

3 Brothers’ Creek – K. Trap Jones
Unfortunately Y’all Ain’t Right ends rather limply with 3 Brothers’ Creek. This short is all over the place, with the narrative jumping around in a way that is convoluted and characters that, by this point in the book, are rather tedious. Jones just about manages to bring it together by the end, but I can’t say it’s a particularly enjoyable journey getting there.

Y’all Ain’t Right marks a step down from Counting Bodies Like Sheep for me. I think restricting the scope to stories set in the South has massively limited the variety on offer, and there are often instances where multiple short stories seem to be treading over the same ground. I found myself quickly growing tired of the repetition of stereotypes and tropes. Despite this, there are very few entries here that just flat-out didn’t work for me – the majority ended up being just okay. Thankfully there are still some really solid entertaining short stories that rise to the top, particularly Kin, Swamp Water Boogie, and Obama Lover. I will say that I do think Y’all Ain’t Right works well as a way of experiencing authors whose names you may be familiar with, but as a whole I did find the variance in quality notable.

3/5

[Danny Welch · Rating 4 out of 5]

Y'All Ain't Right is Evil Cookie's horror anthology for 2024. So far I've found these anthologies to be quite the mixed bag, but I've definitely found a few favourites in them. This one I've had my eye on for a while now. Edward Lee writing another Header story? Yes, please!

The Moonshining:
Their grandfather sent Gator and his cousin Brody III to his moonshine shack for the winter to make sure their family interests are safe. It isn't long before they run out of food and drink. In order to survive, desperate measures have to be taken.

Jeff Strand has written a hilarious and gruesome story on cannibalism. It's a grim narrative that doesn't take itself seriously and has some brilliant gags. Really enjoyed this one. 8.5/10

Sweet Pea:
Luke has been cheating on his wife for a while now. His wife's best-friend is just too beautiful to resist. So when she finds out, she abandons them across the road, but that's only the beginning of his problems. Luke is about to discover a terrifying truth.

Kristopher Rufty has written an engaging story about betrayal and murder. It's very much the type of scenario you've heard many times in the news, but Kristopher plays it off in such a bizarre and twisty manner that it keeps you on the edge of your seat. 8/10

Cherrified:
A bizarre condition causes her virginity to return whenever someone takes it. She didn't know this initially, but now she realizes she can use it to take revenge on the people who have hurt her.

Bridgett Nelson has written a bizarre and gruesome story about a woman's vagina that turns deadly when her cherry heals itself. A fun story with a very uncomfortable ending. 8/10

Each of Us Sinners:
Debra and her wife Helen decide to see Debra's sister one last time before she passes away from cancer. Big Bertha, her sister, is an odd individual, and she's withholding a terrifying secret.

I didn't really care for this one. I liked the concept, but it got a bit too weird and silly for my tastes. 4/10

A Header Tale:
Dory Ann Slate has a story to tell Marla, of the time a violent and selfish man brutally murdered and raped her sister. Marla is about to find out that headers aren't myth.

Edward Lee has written an unsettling tale of rape and revenge. I love how Lee handled the first-person narrative in this. 9/10

Toad Juice:
Zelda loves her owner, Scott, but doesn't like it when he covers his nuts with peanut butter and makes her lick it off. She's always wanted to kill a toad and eat it and today's her chance. But in doing so she inhales something she shouldn't have and soon a hunger like no other rises in her.

Patrick R. McDonough has written a disturbing story about a dog inhaling a drug from a toad that leads her to attacking and eating humans who she believes to be toads. There are moments of dark humor in this, but the premise is really horrible. If you're frightened of dogs, stay away from this one. 9/10

Genital Grinder 2.5:
Its December 2003, Greg and Von are to see a porn star by the name of Ginny. They can't wait to have some action with the anal queen herself. But when she turns the table on them, they decide to teach her a lesson.

I haven't read Genital Grinder, but this story certainly gives you a taste of what to expect in that collection. Ryan Harding has written a disturbing and graphic short story of genital torture. It's an uncomfortable and page-turning read that concludes with a stomach turning finale. 8/10

Obama Lover:
He enjoys killing; but he only enjoys killing bad people. When he sees a racist white man knock over a black woman, he decides to teach him a lesson he'll never forget.

Wrath James White has written a brutal and graphic poem about a family loving black man who enjoys killing people who do terrible things to others. 9/10

YooFo:
Clayton is taking his younger brother to an area where the men take their homecoming dates for a bit of hanky-panky. What he doesn't expect, however, is for a YooFo to crash-land instead. Riley, his brother, is about to see tits of a different kind.

Christine Morgan has written an amusing tale of a pair of right-wing young boys coming across a group of aliens, after intending to spy on some high schoolers and their homecoming dates. 8/10

Welcome to Clifton, TX:
Justin has invited his brother and his girlfriend to a concert he's won tickets for, but unfortunately, he has an ulterior motive. Sleepy Ryan stops the car near a house that's nearly finished construction, but when they all wake up, they find themselves in a nightmarish situation with no way out. An angry man in a bunny suit is on their tail and he intends to destroy any trespassers that stand in his way.

Eric Butler has written a fun and gruesome story of a group of people stopping at the wrong place at the wrong time. It's a story that raises a lot of questions but doesn't give any answers. That may be disappointing to some, but I quite liked that aspect of it. 7/10

Back Road:
Miranda's father has been through a lot in the past year, losing his wife and now his beloved cat. Miranda, as a surprise gift, decides to find a taxidermist to fix the feline up. Taking a mysterious back road, however, it isn't long before Miranda and her friends find themselves in trouble, one that they might never escape from.

Candace Nola has written a disturbing and gruesome story of a back road trip gone wrong. It's a very unsettling story with a likable cast of characters and a shocking ending. 10/10

Good Grief, It's The Ejaculantern!:
Our narrator can't dress his house up all fancy for Halloween this year, so instead he decides to tell the young'uns a story. A story of a young woman desperate for sex, but in her lust she brings forth a deadly god.

Douglas Ford has written a gruesome yet funny story that's bizarre and silly, but a lot of fun. 8/10

Kiki:
Both she and her father hate his children from his first marriage. They took everything away from him and she's always been jealous of them. Now it's time for her revenge.

Gregory L. Norris has written a violent black comedy that is fast-paced and relentless. The twist is predictable, but it's fine. I enjoyed this story to an extent, but it didn't really click with me either. 6/10

Swamp Water Boogie:
Mitch and Gary have illegally obtained dynamite in the hope of luring crocodiles to their doom. But when they release the explosives in the nearby lake, they instead release something far worse and far more terrifying.

Daniel J. Volpe has written a brilliantly terrifying and unsettling monster story that's very graphic and brutal. I loved the concept of the creature in this one and what it can do. It has a very chilling and gruesome ending. 10/10

Kin:
Merle's son has gone too far this time. He's murdered his sister and with the police in this county being crap as they are, it seems it's up to Merle's kin to take out the trash for themselves. But as they hunt for his son, they soon realize something sinister has found its way into the woods and it intends to destroy what's left of his family.

Kristopher Triana has written a very unnerving and grim revenge tale that unfolds into a horrifying monster story. It's a well-written narrative that will have you on the edge of your seat. An incredible story with a really cool concept. 10/10

Tremble:
It's been years since the disaster that happened at his high school and now he's an old man. Why does he have a soundproofed room? What happened to the band? Why was Belinda so angry at the end? He has a story to tell, and he doesn't think you'll believe it.

Kasey Lansdale & Joe R. Lansdale have written a tragic story that concludes with a devastating and violent finale. It's a story about a girl with an intense and supernatural vocal talent that is equally beautiful and dangerous. It's a heartbreaking story that reminded me of Carrie. 10/10

3 Brothers' Creek:
People have been going missing and now a detective wants to question a trio of brothers who might know what happened to them. The local authorities, however, know that these 3 are more trouble than they're worth.

K Trap Jones concludes this collection with a story that's admittedly hilarious but at times very uncomfortable. I wasn't too sure where this story was going, since it felt like it was getting sidelined quite a bit, but once you get to the actual ending you realize what's really been going on and why. 5/10

Overall: It's definitely the strongest of the Evil Cookie anthologies I've read so far, really enjoyed this collection. 137.5/170.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars. This was a great collection of stories that take place in the South. Most of the stories were great - however, there were a few that weren’t for me. While several authors were familiar to me, I discovered many new authors that I’ve never read work from before. Great read for any fan of anthology Splatterpunk horror.

[Michael · Rating 1 out of 5]

If there is something "extreme" here, it's the extreme stupidity of these stories. There is nothing even remotely scary in these scribblings, they would have been just laughable if they hadn't been so poorly written. Don't waste your time on this trash.

[PJ · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was completely unhinged. I skipped the first story about halfway for the gratuitous use of the Q word but the rest of these....I mentally what the fuck'ed a couple times. With any collection of short stories some of these were really really good. Gory, creepy, and really messed up and some of them not so much. Read with warning. These take every portrayal of southern "Hill jack" people and amplify it by 1,000 and then add murder and mayhem into the mix. It was like short stories written by the people who live in a B version of The Hills Have Eyes and I really enjoyed it.

[Sea Caummisar · Rating 5 out of 5]

Audio version:
at first, I couldn't figure out what speed to listen..I usually keep my audios at the same speed, but this one I had to slow down a bit. and the voice took a minute to grow on me.. but now it could be my most fave voice ever . also these stories are high-larious!!! great listen .. thanks to an author friend for a ACX code

[ScarlettAnomalyReads · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 rounded up to 4

This was a fun, horrifying, terrible, gore read, and as a southern lady, i cackled reading this one.

I will need to read more from Edward ASAP, I think I saw one about a TV i need to check out.

I already love Jeff Strand and Landsdale, so this is someone else to absolutely add to the list for me .

[Stephanie · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not for me.

[Robert · Rating 2 out of 5]

Only story worth a damn is the Lansdale's. Otherwise, waste of time.