Bride-Made: A Memoir

by Mia J. Hanks

Millions of people are the unknowing victims of narcissists. By the time they realize who they are dealing with, they are often so invested in the relationship that getting out can become both daunting and dangerous. This book is one woman's journey from being groomed by a narcissist, slowly realizing she is in a toxic relationship, to eventually escaping to reclaim her self worth. Through her story you will see how narcissistic behavior wears down the self esteem, self value, and identity of its victims. This book hopes to enlighten others and encourage awareness.

212 pages, Paperback

Published February 14, 2024

Reviews

[Vanessa Cassidy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bride-Made is an eye opening, heartfelt, tearjerker book. Mia J. Hanks takes you along in her marriage and what’s it’s like being married to a narcissist. Through every chapter I cried and said “yep, I’ve been through that.” You never know the full extent of how a narcissist is and how he “preys” on his victim until you are one of them. She is truly an amazing strong person for bringing her story to life for everyone to read I one thousand percent recommend.

[Tina Howard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Educational Excellence

This book caught me by the very beginning. As I continued to read my heart ached for the writer. This book is a memoir of her 29 year abusive marriage to a totally narcissistic man. The writer details her physical and emotional abuse explicitly in detail. She lists signs of abusive narcissistic behavior and what one can get help to get out of the situation. I found it educational and intriguing.

[Stephanie Sommars Curwick · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bride-Made is a heart wrenching yet empowering account about Mia's journey surviving abuse! The writting is raw and engaging making it hard to put down! There are multiple parts in the book that i could relate to. “True intimacy isn’t about sex. It is about being able to look at your partner and say, ‘I feel safe with you’" is such a powerful and truthful line. It was also really interesting to learn where the terms Stockholm Syndrom and Gaslight came from.
It's a must read for anyone who has been through abuse, knows someone who has, or wants to better understand the complexities of trauma.

[Denise Wilt · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was definitely an interesting ride. The author describes her life with a narcissist. She reflects on her life and shares multiple stories that highlight the manipulation and abuse that she suffered. I was impressed with the authors, ability to leave the situation and then look back on it with such clarity. I appreciated that she included information about abuse, definitions, and warning signs. Definitely a good read!

[Peyton Wydick · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bride-Made is an emotional and eye opening account of what it is like to endure the wrath of a covert narcissistic. Over the span of decades, author Mia J Hanks learned to live with the covert narcissistic abuse dished out to her by her husband. She shares her story in short story fashion each chapter, building up to when she found the bravery to seek help and exit her marriage. While Mia's experiences are heartbreaking, her bravery and courage shines through the pages of this book.

The experiences Mia shares are uncomfortable, and that is just the point. So often people throw the word "narcissist" around without knowing what narcissistic behavior actually entails. Mia shares a deeply personal first hand account of what narcissistic abuse looks like in a relationship. As she tells her story, she also offers moments for reflection for readers. One anecdote shared really stuck with me as I read - relationships are not just about intimacy, they are about if you feel save with that person. This is a question worth asking yourself of all relationships in your life - romantic, familial, friendships, etc.

Covert narcissism is not secluded to romantic relationships. And, while Mia's story does focus on her marriage, her message can be applied to relationships of all kinds. I really appreciated the resources Mia included in her memoir, and her courage to share her story. There is no doubt in my mind that this book will find its way into the hands of someone who really needs to hear this story, and it will change them for the better. Thank you to Stress Free Book Marketing for the e-copy!

[Tarin Sussman · Rating 5 out of 5]

This memoir is very eye opening and informative on the ideas and complexities of dealing with a narcissist. Through telling her own experiences, Mia Hanks recalls meeting her husband for their first date and it going perfectly. As time went on, his narcissistic tendencies became more apparent and she realized he fit into the DSM-5 criteria of someone with narcissistic personality disorder. This gave her clarity and she knew a little bit more on how to deal better. The rest of the story is very powerful and should be read by anybody that has a narcissist in their life. One of the lines in the book that made me really love the sharing of this story is the following: "try as you might, you can't ever please a narcissist, for their ideals are not humanly attainable." This was something that I needed to hear and I appreciated it being shared in this memoir.

[Tina Sasso · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eye Opening & Heartfelt

Reading Mia’s story and getting an inside view of someone living in a narcissistic marriage was truly eye opening. The examples of the abuse she endured was heartbreaking to read. I was so mad on her behalf. We all use the term narcissism freely, but learning about her covert narcissist husband and the control and manipulation she endured makes my soul heart for all she’s been through. The joy stolen what should have been happy events, putting down her craft business, all those years of being put down and made to feel less than. I am so glad she got out, got help and continues to work on herself.

[Erika Reynolds · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an informative look into life with a narcissist. Hanks provides anecdotes of her marriage to a covert narcissist, from the early courting stages to 29 years into the marriage. She defines terms, provides examples and signs, and demonstrates the emotional and physical effects of narcissistic abuse. The book is pretty short, and while I found it interesting, it felt surface level for such a long marriage. Each chapter is like a vignette of a specific point in her life with her abuser that jumps around in time as opposed to a cohesive story. Overall though, this is an engaging and empowering story about surviving and overcoming narcissistic abuse.

[Zoey Wells · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a very heavy read. It follows a woman named Mia who is in a very toxic relationship. Mia’s story has a lot of life lessons in it. For example it shows that not everything is what it seems. In the book it states “to the outside world I had it all.” However she was hurting. In chapter 4 it also states that narcissism isn’t just some personality traits. It’s a disorder, a way of life. If you come across these types of people you can’t “fix” them you just have to let them out of your life.
The lessons in this book are invaluable. And this is a great read.

[Debbilly12 · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an amazing story of how one woman overcame mental abuse and regained control of her life. By all standards they had the perfect suburban life, 2 kids, nice house and cars, vacations etc. The mental abuse Mia was put through by her narcissistic husband and remained silent for years about is heartbreaking. It actually took her years to realize she was being abused and even more years to actually do something about it, remaining silent all those years. The saying you never know what goes on behind closed doors is very true.

[Virginia Marmol · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thankfully I have never been in an abusive relationship, however, this book was a well written story of hope. It's a lovely account of how a woman found hope despite her ugly past. It would be such a positive book for anyone who has gone through any type of abuse showing that healing and freedom are possible or just wants to read a story that has a positive outlook in the end.

[Lona Kaplan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I flew through this book-the stories and analysis of are engrossing. If anyone thinks they are in a relationship with a narcissist, this book provides a blueprint to use to evaluate your relationship and to try to break free! What a wonderful resource for women-the author has no trouble being real, vulnerable and authentic. She breaks down the motivations of her abuser and her own reactions and makes it all make sense with no pretense or ego getting in the way of her lens. A great read!

[MIKE WITTER · Rating 5 out of 5]

Narcissism

Very enlightening book about the world of a narcissist and their victim. This book shows that narcissists live for themselves. A must read for anyone who even thinks they may be in this type of relationship.

[Literary Reviewer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This memoir chronicles the author’s harrowing journey through a marriage overshadowed by covert narcissistic abuse. Starting from a seemingly perfect courtship filled with grand gestures, the book delves into how these acts masked deeper patterns of control and manipulation. Through raw and vivid storytelling, the author unpacks her three-decade-long experience, highlighting moments of self-doubt, realizations, and eventual awakening to her abusive reality. With each chapter, the layers of a toxic relationship unravel, exposing not only her struggles but also her resilience.

The writing is deeply personal, and I couldn’t help but feel a mix of anger and sadness at the situations described. The bathroom Diet Coke incident is a striking example of the emotional volatility she endured. Her husband’s tantrum over a minor delay in their conversation—escalating to a thrown drink—painted a clear picture of his need for absolute dominance. The author’s immediate response to clean up the mess despite being the victim highlights the insidious ways abuse manipulates self-worth. It was infuriating to see her so conditioned to keep the peace, even when it meant sacrificing her dignity.

Equally haunting is the depiction of the cruise incident. Here, the physical toll of her seasickness became another battleground for her husband’s lack of empathy. His insistence on invalidating her feelings and his public facade of concern while privately berating her for “ruining” the vacation added layers to the narrative. The juxtaposition between how he treated her in public versus private left me astounded by the double life she was forced to endure.

What struck me most was the chapter on “Books and Highlighters,” where her husband’s attempt to “fix” her highlighted his entitlement. By assigning her a stack of self-help books with instructions to color-code them, he underscored his need for control under the guise of self-improvement. Yet, her silent rebellion—using this time to research toxic relationships—was a powerful testament to her growing awareness and inner strength.

Bride-Made is a courageous testament to survival and self-discovery. It’s not just a story of abuse but a guide for others to recognize and break free from similar patterns. I’d recommend this book to anyone seeking to understand covert narcissism, especially those in toxic relationships who feel unseen or unheard. The raw honesty and relatable anecdotes make it both heartbreaking and empowering.

[Thea Ferzola · Rating 5 out of 5]

“There is nothing more confining than the prison we don’t know we are in.”
Author Mia J. Hanks precisely chose this Shakespearian quote to begin her memoir, Bride Made. While reading, it becomes apparent that Mia was not only in a prison that she was unaware of, but she helped craft it as well. This book was not easy for me to read, I saw many parallels to my life, living with a narcissist. I actually got the chills, and a slight taste of vomit in my mouth when reading what Mia so accurately describes “...they can put on an “empathic show” when it benefits them or when they need to look like the hero or the victim”. Her hero spent years grooming her to be the perfect wife, and put forth the appearance of being the perfect couple. She was forced to put her interests aside, and raise him up on every platform. Raising a child with Autism, and essentially being a single parent, didn't’ give Mia much time to contemplate her circumstances. She began to accept the abuse as normal. Fortunately, she sought the help of a therapist and later, a divorce attorney. This memoir doesn’t only retell Mia’s firsthand experience of living with a quintessential narcissist, but also has helpful information for those who may be in a similar situation. Let’s hope that Mia’s memoir will spare another woman’s misfortune of spending 29 years with a monster in disguise as a prince

[Dean · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brid-Made: A Memoir offers a powerful and necessary account of one woman's harrowing journey through narcissistic abuse. The author courageously documents her experience from the initial grooming phase through the gradual awakening to her reality, culminating in her brave escape and the challenging path to reclaiming her identity.
What makes this memoir particularly valuable is its unflinching portrayal of how narcissistic manipulation systematically dismantles self-esteem and erodes personal boundaries. The author's honest vulnerability creates an intimate connection with readers who may recognize disturbing parallels in their own relationships.
The narrative skill displayed throughout the memoir transforms what could be an overwhelming subject into an accessible and compelling read. By weaving personal experience with moments of insight, the author creates both an emotional journey and an educational resource.
For anyone questioning their relationship dynamics or supporting someone trapped in narcissistic abuse, this book serves as both validation and warning. Beyond just telling a personal story, Brid-Made fulfills its aim of raising awareness about the insidious nature of narcissistic relationships and illuminates a path toward freedom and self-reclamation that will resonate with readers long after the final page.

[Amanda Dingman · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bride-Made: A Memoir is a story about a woman enduring 30+ years of emotional abuse from her covert narcissistic husband. While a mix of a personal story and an index of information about narcissists, this story will have you incessantly flipping pages, trying to figure out what will happen next. It is a heartbreaking story that makes you gasp the more you read. You can't help but feel the narrator's emotions so deeply, and you intimately feel like you want to jump through the pages to help her escape.

While I know of narcissism and of people who have been in emotionally abusive relationships, this story further expanded my knowledge of what narcissism can look like in relationships and how it can affect families for generations. Hoping this book lands in the laps of those who need to hear this story - I'm positive it will.

Thank you to Mia for sharing your story - I know it must have been so hard, but by helping even just one person, you have done the world a great service.

Thank you to Stress Free Book Marketing for the e-copy!

[B. Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ms. Hanks in her debut novel expresses a vulnerability that is intended to help other victims recognize their position and provide those who haven’t had the same experience sympathize with her memories. Which is extremely easy to do as she utilizes stories and definitions to outline exactly why narcissistic behavior is so dangerous to be around. She shows herself as extremely intelligent, capable, and a woman of true courage because she found it in herself throughout her story.

Often times I think that memoirs are overlooked when they’re not from famous people but these are the ones that matter the most. Everyday people who can inspire others by their stories, by their actions, and Mia, she is an inspiration.

I truly enjoyed this memoir and found it a fascinating insight into how complacency cannot be allowed and that freedom can take time but is always worth the fight.

[Jennifer Carboy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bride made : a memoir by Mia Hanks was a great book . I could not put it down. Mia retells stories throughout the book about situations her family and herself were put in while living with a narcissistic spouse (father). I really did not know much about what a narcissist was until reading this book. Mia breaks down the chapters by first giving an example of a something her husband said or did and then how she handled it and realized what was so wrong about his behavior . Bride made is a great book and was so interesting that the pages just seemed to fly by. I hope Mia writes more books because I would love to read them. She has a knack for keeping the reader engaged and relating to her and then leaves you eager to find out how she made out in the end.

[Jennifer Koliatsis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mia J. Hanks should be praised for putting down on paper an all too familiar story that so many women need to read. I wanted to scream through the pages so many times at her husband out of sheer anger! She really delves into all aspects of a narcissistic relationship ranging from love bombing to financial control to physical power and of course gaslighting. I loved how she interrupts her text with pieces of crucial information such as the section title “Nine Signs of a Trauma Bond.” As a parent, it was heartbreaking to read about her own children’s experiences. Especially when her daughter started to understand her father’s poor behavior. This is truly an eye opening text and a must read for all women.

[Jacqueline Rossi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was such an interesting and eye-opening read. As a married woman, I couldn’t help but compare and learn from this book. In this compelling memoir, Hanks walks us through her life and paints the picture for us of how she was a victim of narcissistic abuse. Her definitions and research into this abuse made it clear to her that she wasn’t wrong and she was a victim. Although the stories are heartbreaking and provoking, they are also inspiring and courageous. I love how there is a “happy ending” and Mia breaks free of abuse. Her husband, the covert narcissist, broke her down mentally and depleted her self-worth. It’s eye-opening to see the steps she is taking to gain that self-worth, self-love, and true self back.

[Samantha Sesenton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eye-Opening, heartbreaking, and courageous. These are all words I would use to describe Mia's story, as she navigates us through her journey of abuse and ultimately breaking free. She not only tells her story but also provides insight and information on the characteristics of covert narcissistic abuse, which can prove to be helpful for someone going through a similar experience and may not be aware. Her explanations and stories help the reader understand the complexities of abuse and how it is not always physical. I felt so many emotions when Mia was finally able to break free from what she thought was "love" for so many years. This was truly a powerful read!

[Kaylyn Hansen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Do you have a narcissist in your life?
This book is not only the courageous story of one woman who was married to a narcissistic husband and the life she had with him, it will also help guide you and open your eyes if you believe you too have a narcissist in your life. This book will give you the clarity to see the abuse you may also be experiencing. Abuse isn’t always physical. You may be surprised to what you find out in your own life by reading Mia’s journey through her abuse and ultimately her freedom.

[Lily Schmidt · Rating 5 out of 5]

A powerful and eye-opening read, Bride-Made: A Memoir takes readers on a deeply personal journey through the insidious grip of narcissistic abuse. With raw honesty, the author details how she was groomed, manipulated, and nearly lost herself before finding the strength to break free. Her story is both heartbreaking and empowering, shedding light on the emotional toll of toxic relationships while offering hope for those seeking to reclaim their self-worth. A must-read for anyone who has struggled with or wants to better understand narcissistic abuse.

[Annie Schiavone · Rating 5 out of 5]

This story is hard to read, especially if you have had experience with a narcissist. However, through her memoir, Mia, who met this man at the young age of 19, tells stories that are so relatable and disturbing simultaneously. One quote “Narcissists feel as though they are more important than the average person…”, really struck me. This is a definite read, and I praise Ms. Hanks for her storytelling and advice, as this, in my opinion, will absolutely help someone who may be silently dealing with a similar situation.

[Charlene · Rating 5 out of 5]

a really interesting book with lots of information regarding narcissistic behavior. It is amazing how many people will be able to relate to this story. After reading this book I realized how many I know are also narcissistic. This eye opening story of Mia and her experiences dealing with a narcissistic husband while raising her two children is awe inspiring! So interesting and complex, a real page turner and a must read to be enlightened of this behavior

[Kerri · Rating 5 out of 5]

Bride-Made: A Memoir by Mia J. Hanks is a powerful and honest account of her nearly 30-year marriage to a covert narcissist. Through a collection of short stories, she shares how emotional manipulation slowly wore down her confidence and identity. The book sheds light on the hidden side of narcissistic abuse while offering hope to those trying to heal. Readers praise its raw and relatable storytelling, making it a must-read for anyone wanting to understand and overcome toxic relationships.

[Carol Schiavone · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is so sad when people find themselves in relationships with narcissists, oftentimes when it is too late. This book shares one woman's journey of being in a relationship with a narcissist. Her story will help readers see the harmful effects of narcissistic behavior on self-esteem and identity. The book aims to raise awareness and help others recognize the signs, offering hope that healing and rediscovery are possible, no matter how difficult the journey may seem.

[Valerie Henry · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOW!!! I devoured this book within hours. I thankfully have never been married to a narcissist, but I was friends with one for a short time. This book is so accurate. It's incredibly sad to read what Mia went through, but I know this book will help other people and open their eyes to what they might not see in someone. Thank you Mia for all the research you put into this book. It's so good!!!