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Pugnus
Pugnus
In a life he eventually decides to leave, we meet Jeremy through the eyes of both his most critical audience, and his biggest fan...
After spending the best part of his adult life in the limelight, Jeremy easily gets work based on who he used to be. Somewhere between taking just enough guest slots to keep the fans happy, and owning a highly sort after spot fairly close to his family in a leafy part of London, what he wants is still just out of reach...
Luckily the smile still reaches the eyes, but sometimes what you need is a mug of vodka and two tablets from the piss yellow bottle, to get it there.
'As Jeremy’s last days unfold the secret world his fans don’t get to see, Pugnus reveals a starkly honest glimpse into some of the prolifically experienced, yet vehemently unspoken taboos, which are often hidden in plain sight.'
“ Saturday *10.32am* (Ashley)
Food, sleep, and jingle ball. All that any good boy could want. As long as he could make Jeremy laugh and keep him safe, it was a good day as far as Ashley was concerned.
Saturday *10.33am* (Jeremy)
He lit up and inhaled the bitter sweet combination of petrol and tar. The lighters lid felt smooth and cold as he gently flipped it with a satisfying plink, up and back down. A metronome for his thoughts. Out of habit, he placed his thumb pad directly over the familiar uneven grain of words inscribed into the metal, to hide them or be closer to them, he was never sure… ”
‘This story is by no means unique in the real world. What is unique however, is finding it being told from this vantage point in the literary world. Not only because we get to listen to his dogs thoughts on the seemingly mundane but happy time they spend together, but because we get to listen to Jeremys own thoughts on the mediocre, or maybe even privileged daily build up that leads him to take his own life. A true lived experience for the main character, and also for myself as an onlooker. This tragic death by suicide and many of the things that lead to the final hours of Jeremys life, have been explored with truly fresh eyes.’
‘Yet again, this author breaks new ground in opening up the realities so many people experience and yet are never quite seen. Brave and honest writing, forging a whole new genre.’
“ Thursday *6:31pm* (Jeremy)
The smell of Chanel always made him feel sick. As he pulled out of her drive waving, his stomach was churning. As soon as he was out of the cul-de-sac, he pulled over, almost tore his shirt in his haste to remove it as the perfume had penetrated to its core, mocking him in its expensive way, and pulled on a jacket that he left in the car for emergency rain. He tipped two tablets from the piss yellow bottle, turned the stereo up as loud as it would go, and wheel spun off, taking the tablets with his free hand as he headed for the motorway at sixty-five, feeling sicker by the minute ”
‘What you see, depends on how you look’
*TRIGGER WARNING* - Contains reference to suicide and other material some people may find upsetting
In a life he eventually decides to leave, we meet Jeremy through the eyes of both his most critical audience, and his biggest fan...
After spending the best part of his adult life in the limelight, Jeremy easily gets work based on who he used to be. Somewhere between taking just enough guest slots to keep the fans happy, and owning a highly sort after spot fairly close to his family in a leafy part of London, what he wants is still just out of reach...
Luckily the smile still reaches the eyes, but sometimes what you need is a mug of vodka and two tablets from the piss yellow bottle, to get it there.
'As Jeremy’s last days unfold the secret world his fans don’t get to see, Pugnus reveals a starkly honest glimpse into some of the prolifically experienced, yet vehemently unspoken taboos, which are often hidden in plain sight.'
“ Saturday *10.32am* (Ashley)
Food, sleep, and jingle ball. All that any good boy could want. As long as he could make Jeremy laugh and keep him safe, it was a good day as far as Ashley was concerned.
Saturday *10.33am* (Jeremy)
He lit up and inhaled the bitter sweet combination of petrol and tar. The lighters lid felt smooth and cold as he gently flipped it with a satisfying plink, up and back down. A metronome for his thoughts. Out of habit, he placed his thumb pad directly over the familiar uneven grain of words inscribed into the metal, to hide them or be closer to them, he was never sure… ”
‘This story is by no means unique in the real world. What is unique however, is finding it being told from this vantage point in the literary world. Not only because we get to listen to his dogs thoughts on the seemingly mundane but happy time they spend together, but because we get to listen to Jeremys own thoughts on the mediocre, or maybe even privileged daily build up that leads him to take his own life. A true lived experience for the main character, and also for myself as an onlooker. This tragic death by suicide and many of the things that lead to the final hours of Jeremys life, have been explored with truly fresh eyes.’
‘Yet again, this author breaks new ground in opening up the realities so many people experience and yet are never quite seen. Brave and honest writing, forging a whole new genre.’
“ Thursday *6:31pm* (Jeremy)
The smell of Chanel always made him feel sick. As he pulled out of her drive waving, his stomach was churning. As soon as he was out of the cul-de-sac, he pulled over, almost tore his shirt in his haste to remove it as the perfume had penetrated to its core, mocking him in its expensive way, and pulled on a jacket that he left in the car for emergency rain. He tipped two tablets from the piss yellow bottle, turned the stereo up as loud as it would go, and wheel spun off, taking the tablets with his free hand as he headed for the motorway at sixty-five, feeling sicker by the minute ”
‘What you see, depends on how you look’
*TRIGGER WARNING* - Contains reference to suicide and other material some people may find upsetting
135 pages, Hardcover
Published February 9, 2024
About the author
Sarah Monie
8 books6 followersOverview -
Small self-published human, battling bad spelling and low to medium self worth ;)
(*AKA The odd thought doodler and occasional adult :D)
Details -
Name: Sarah
Place of birth: Earth
Age: Yes, I do
Hopes:
Changing the world, one story at a time x
Fears:
Spelling tests, Brown envelopes, My Manager asking to speak to me
Goals:
Adulting 10- Fun 10
Realistic Goals:
Adulting 7- Fun 5
Current Goals Score:
Adulting 1- Fun 0
Favourite quote:
"Always look harder at what you can already see" - Me 2001
And remember... What you see depends on how you look & your perspective depends on where you stand.
Stay muchy,
Sarah x
Small self-published human, battling bad spelling and low to medium self worth ;)
(*AKA The odd thought doodler and occasional adult :D)
Details -
Name: Sarah
Place of birth: Earth
Age: Yes, I do
Hopes:
Changing the world, one story at a time x
Fears:
Spelling tests, Brown envelopes, My Manager asking to speak to me
Goals:
Adulting 10- Fun 10
Realistic Goals:
Adulting 7- Fun 5
Current Goals Score:
Adulting 1- Fun 0
Favourite quote:
"Always look harder at what you can already see" - Me 2001
And remember... What you see depends on how you look & your perspective depends on where you stand.
Stay muchy,
Sarah x
Ratings & Reviews
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Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
June 29, 2024
I have to say, as I finished this one I re-read it all!
So many things conveyed in a relatively short book. I wish I could have 'met' Jeremy, and maybe been there for some of the things he faced alone. Such an emotive and beautifully honest narrative, and another superb win for depicting real peoples experiences of the hidden things in life.
Suicide is a tough subject. This is one of the best fiction stories I have found that brings the real human side of someone's experiences of the struggles some of us have with mental health and feeling alone. Very different approach and style and as good as 'Graceful', without a doubt! :') Now firmly one of my favorite authors!
So many things conveyed in a relatively short book. I wish I could have 'met' Jeremy, and maybe been there for some of the things he faced alone. Such an emotive and beautifully honest narrative, and another superb win for depicting real peoples experiences of the hidden things in life.
Suicide is a tough subject. This is one of the best fiction stories I have found that brings the real human side of someone's experiences of the struggles some of us have with mental health and feeling alone. Very different approach and style and as good as 'Graceful', without a doubt! :') Now firmly one of my favorite authors!
April 28, 2024
Picked this up as a bit of a wild card as not heard of the author but liked the feel. More a novella than a full novel, which I prefer. Absolutely blew me away and this doesn't happen often. Don't want to spoil it, but HAD to share, as this is a hidden gem! Give it a chance, you won't be disappointed if you like a serious, punchy read.
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews