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Backbone: The Modern Man's Ultimate Guide to Purpose, Passion and Power
You deserve the best of life.
And your life deserves the best of you.
What does it mean to be a powerful happy man in today’s world? What does it take for a man to know himself, know his mission in life, and live a life of strength, honor, and wisdom?
Learning to be a good man used to be part of our culture; sons learned from fathers, nephews learned from uncles, apprentices learned from masters. But today this rarely happens. Modern men have to figure it out by themselves. Backbone is a practical, step-by-step guide to help men know themselves deeply, root out weaknesses, enhance strengths, and upgrade their experience of life.
Backbone combines no-nonsense wisdom with brutally honest exercises to help men to:
• find their purpose and be on track with their vision
• access and hone their spiritual and emotional intelligence
• get free from unhelpful beliefs, patterns, and habits
• live an amazing, powerful, passion-filled life
And your life deserves the best of you.
What does it mean to be a powerful happy man in today’s world? What does it take for a man to know himself, know his mission in life, and live a life of strength, honor, and wisdom?
Learning to be a good man used to be part of our culture; sons learned from fathers, nephews learned from uncles, apprentices learned from masters. But today this rarely happens. Modern men have to figure it out by themselves. Backbone is a practical, step-by-step guide to help men know themselves deeply, root out weaknesses, enhance strengths, and upgrade their experience of life.
Backbone combines no-nonsense wisdom with brutally honest exercises to help men to:
• find their purpose and be on track with their vision
• access and hone their spiritual and emotional intelligence
• get free from unhelpful beliefs, patterns, and habits
• live an amazing, powerful, passion-filled life
272 pages, Hardcover
First published May 5, 2015
60 people are currently reading
575 people want to read
About the author
David H. Wagner
7 books13 followersDavid H Wagner is a spiritual teacher, men's group leader, and proud father who has dedicated his life to the exploration of personal transformation. He travels widely leading workshops and retreats for people from all walks of life from all over the world. He is the host of The Whole Manchilada Podcast, is a featured meditation teacher on Yogaglo.com, and serves on the faculties of Kripalu and Omega Institutes.
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
February 2, 2016
Heteronormative.
Hypermasculine.
Garbage.
I took about 10% of the good things away from this book. The rest... absolutely a waste of time. He has no clue how "real" men should work and bases the entirety of his teaching on how to be hypermasculine and enforce gender stereotypes in a society that is attempting to diverge from them.
I would recommend this to no one. I have had a series of Tweets to the author, and he hasn't responded yet. I'd be interested in talking to him about this, but I will not push the issue further.
Last thing: Just because you explain WHY it's okay to use derogatory words that are degrating to women does NOT make it okay. It makes you look more like an asshole.
Hypermasculine.
Garbage.
I took about 10% of the good things away from this book. The rest... absolutely a waste of time. He has no clue how "real" men should work and bases the entirety of his teaching on how to be hypermasculine and enforce gender stereotypes in a society that is attempting to diverge from them.
I would recommend this to no one. I have had a series of Tweets to the author, and he hasn't responded yet. I'd be interested in talking to him about this, but I will not push the issue further.
Last thing: Just because you explain WHY it's okay to use derogatory words that are degrating to women does NOT make it okay. It makes you look more like an asshole.
November 12, 2021
Preface: If you're hypersensitive and easily offended, if you think masculinity automatically equals TOXIC masculinity, and you enjoy being that way, you do you. But this book is NOT for you.
If you're sensitive and easily offended and want to change that, there's a great deal of wisdom and practicality here.
If you want to step into your power as a man, to take hold of your life and make things happen instead of letting things happen to you, this book could benefit you.
If you want to learn some basic knowledge and skills that men should ideally know, reading this book could be useful in stepping into your masculinity and learning some of the basic things you need to understand about what being a man is all about.
I'm not saying this is a complete guide to being a man at all. I don't even necessarily agree with everything in this book. What I AM saying is that it can be one tool in your masculinity toolbox.
If you read this and think it promotes toxic masculinity or think it encourages the degradation of women or teaches lack of respect, then you've completely misunderstood its message. It does have an overarching message, and if you get caught up in being offended by Wagner's language or anecdotes, if you get offended by his way of speaking, then you probably need this book more than anyone, my guy.
Bottom line: the world desperately needs more strong men. Not disrespectful jerks that abuse others and lack respect for women, but strong, masculine men who aren't afraid to take charge of situations and be leaders in their workplaces, communities, and households. Men who act in spite of fear or reservation, men who look out for the good of others, who love their girlfriends, wives, daughters and mothers, and strive to protect them at all costs. This book is about promoting those values. If you can get past the semantics and not be offended on every page, you may glean some wisdom and practicality from this book. And you'll be a better man because of it.
If you're sensitive and easily offended and want to change that, there's a great deal of wisdom and practicality here.
If you want to step into your power as a man, to take hold of your life and make things happen instead of letting things happen to you, this book could benefit you.
If you want to learn some basic knowledge and skills that men should ideally know, reading this book could be useful in stepping into your masculinity and learning some of the basic things you need to understand about what being a man is all about.
I'm not saying this is a complete guide to being a man at all. I don't even necessarily agree with everything in this book. What I AM saying is that it can be one tool in your masculinity toolbox.
If you read this and think it promotes toxic masculinity or think it encourages the degradation of women or teaches lack of respect, then you've completely misunderstood its message. It does have an overarching message, and if you get caught up in being offended by Wagner's language or anecdotes, if you get offended by his way of speaking, then you probably need this book more than anyone, my guy.
Bottom line: the world desperately needs more strong men. Not disrespectful jerks that abuse others and lack respect for women, but strong, masculine men who aren't afraid to take charge of situations and be leaders in their workplaces, communities, and households. Men who act in spite of fear or reservation, men who look out for the good of others, who love their girlfriends, wives, daughters and mothers, and strive to protect them at all costs. This book is about promoting those values. If you can get past the semantics and not be offended on every page, you may glean some wisdom and practicality from this book. And you'll be a better man because of it.
September 15, 2019
I'm a autistic man
I have autism, and after reading this it's my belief that this will help any man I started using the teachings in this book and I've been doing far better than I have ever been I've learned more from this book than 23 years of my 26 year old life I am actually happier than I thought was allowed for a person of my disability if I can improve my life you can too if you apply the lessons in this book please read this thing.
I have autism, and after reading this it's my belief that this will help any man I started using the teachings in this book and I've been doing far better than I have ever been I've learned more from this book than 23 years of my 26 year old life I am actually happier than I thought was allowed for a person of my disability if I can improve my life you can too if you apply the lessons in this book please read this thing.
July 3, 2017
Above average book with very practical information to use. I would recommend for your masculinity library!
May 1, 2023
Some interesting concepts, but I couldn't finish the book. Couldn't get past the hyper masculinity and focus on heterosexual men.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 29, 2024
Super. Must read!
December 29, 2015
It's okay and worth a read for men who have never taken a mans course or been part of a brotherhood. It's full of cliches about male dominance, assertion, responsibility and fatherhood/husbandry but well-written nonetheless. I like the concise format with a review and summary at the end of each chapter.
I can't say that this is earth-shattering or stuff I hadn't heard or thought of before, at least at age 50 and having experienced a divorce, but the book did a decent job of integrating and synthesizing my thoughts developed on this subject. The doctrine sounds exactly like I heard my friend always say about a Justin Sterling Mens Weekend he partook in. I don't know to what extent, if any, that Justin's and David's lives crossed paths but it seems like they must have.
I can't say that this is earth-shattering or stuff I hadn't heard or thought of before, at least at age 50 and having experienced a divorce, but the book did a decent job of integrating and synthesizing my thoughts developed on this subject. The doctrine sounds exactly like I heard my friend always say about a Justin Sterling Mens Weekend he partook in. I don't know to what extent, if any, that Justin's and David's lives crossed paths but it seems like they must have.
June 23, 2015
Goodreads win. Will read and review once received.
Even though I am not a man but a woman I found this book to be interesting and enlightening. I do plan on passing this book along. The book was a pretty quick read. It took about two days to read. I loved the size of the font. It wasn't too small and not too big. I can see this book being of help and popular with men and young men. This was a definitive good read. Something I would highly recommend.
Even though I am not a man but a woman I found this book to be interesting and enlightening. I do plan on passing this book along. The book was a pretty quick read. It took about two days to read. I loved the size of the font. It wasn't too small and not too big. I can see this book being of help and popular with men and young men. This was a definitive good read. Something I would highly recommend.
April 8, 2016
Honestly, I didn't finish it... I know, I know, I am not a guy so the book wasn't really tailored to me but I was hoping to actually gain something from it. But it really seemed like common sense and stuff that is regurgitated in magazines and on TV. It was just spiced up a bit with terminology and nice formatting.
September 10, 2017
Interesting. A bit cultish for my taste, but for those needing to be raised, even after reaching adulthood, there are useful bits. I don't think there are masculine standards that we've forgotten, but personal standards are neglected. There is no across-the-board prescription.
August 22, 2016
I won it in a contest and read it for review but I very much enjoyed the zen approach to being a better man. It was a modern, direct and honest way to look at your life.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews