Let Her Go

by Dawn Barker (Contributor)

A powerful and haunting novel about family, motherhood and letting go from the author of Fractured.

How far would you go to have a family?
What would you hide for someone you love?

Confused and desperate, Zoe McAllister boards a ferry to Rottnest Island in the middle of winter holding a tiny baby close to her chest, terrified that her husband will find her or that her sister will call the police.

Years later, a teenage girl, Louise, is found on the island, unconscious and alone. Flown out for urgent medical treatment, when she recovers she returns home and overhears her parents discussing her past and the choices that they've made. Their secrets, slowly revealed, will shatter more than one family and, for Louise, nothing will ever be the same again.

Let Her Go is a gripping, emotionally charged story of family, secrets and the complications of love. Part thriller, part mystery, it will stay with you long after you close the pages wondering ... What would you have done?

Genres: Contemporary, Fiction, Mystery, Womens Fiction, Womens, Australia

352 pages, Paperback

First published June 24, 2014

About the author

Dr Dawn Barker is a psychiatrist and author. She grew up in Scotland, then in 2001 she moved to Australia, completed her psychiatric training and began writing.
Her first novel, Fractured, was selected for the 2010 Hachette/Queensland Writers Centre manuscript development programme, was one of Australia's bestselling debut fiction titles for 2013, and was shortlisted for the 2014 WA Premier's Book Awards.
Her second novel is Let Her Go.

Dawn lives in Perth with her husband and three young children.

Reviews

[Suz · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this emotionally charged family drama to be an engrossing read. It was an easy pick up and put down read; engrossing and compelling. I found it waned in the last third, therefore I settled on 4 stars.

Written by a child psychiatrist, I sensed the telling was authentic, and the subject matter serious and conflicting. The author stated in her notes she was interested in writing about surrogacy and the emotions compelled upon those family members involved.

Stepsisters, Zoe and Nadia appear to be quite close. Zoe has lupus (explained well I thought, as I have rheumatology issues and I found it to be well considered and presented) and cannot have children. She’s suffered so much physically and mentally losing a handful of pregnancies.

Nadia, a psychologist with three children of her own, takes a leap and decides to carry a child for her sister, combined with Zoe’s husband’s sperm. Being in the industry of psychology, I found Nadia’s character to be flawed, she was not altruistically motivated, and this was evident I think when her husband tried to turn her around and question this whole idea. This character was unlikeable and I questioned everything she did.

Zoe finally has her baby, but a birth mother’s attachment overrides everything and Nadia accuses Zoe and her husband of many things, where I saw Nadia being the mentally unwell party.

I did not love any of the characters, I found the relinquishing mother’s group dangerous and ill-informed for Nadia’s cause. The story was told between time lines, the times of birth and conception, and the child’s adolescence, where I enjoyed the past a lot more. Such a complex issue, where each side had its merits, but for me, I clearly sided with one sister more. This is good writing, where the reader questions things and creates pros, cons and internal debate.

A very well written contemporary story with parts thriller and drama, this book had been on my TBR for 9 years. Better late than never, right?! Recommended easy reading, fans of AWW will like this one, I'm sure.

[Sharon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Zoe McAllister has longed to be a mother, but after three miscarriages and dealing with the debilitating disease of lupus since she was a teenager it seems the odds were against her. And then the day came when her doctor told her she would never be able to have a child, Zoe felt nothing but headache and pain. Zoe’s dream of of having a family with Lachlan was never going to happen and it was the hardest thing she would have to come to terms with emotionally and mentally. Lachlan did all he could, but he worked away a lot so he wasn't really aware of just how much this was effecting Zoe.

Then one day, Zoe’s half-sister Nadia offered, Zoe and Lachlan something that would change their lives forever. Zoe’s life long dream was about to come true and she and Lachlan couldn't be happier or could they? Not long after their dream came true was when, Lachlan suddenly changed and his moods were intolerable and then not long after, Nadia had also started to change. This should’ve been the happiest time of their lives, but it was all starting to fall apart.

Seventeen years later, Louise a very out of control teenager and has done nothing, but give her parents a lot of grief which starts to take its toll on everyone. But things are about to get a lot worse when, Louise starts to find out some family hidden secrets. Will this family be able to work through their problems and start to be a real family again or is it too late?

A well written story which touched on some sensitive issues. For me personally this was a hard book to read at times, but in saying that I still really enjoyed it and I have no hesitation in recommending it.

[ReadAlongWithSue recovering from a stroke★⋆. ࿐࿔ · Rating 4 out of 5]

Crying at Christmas.
Oh geez.
What an emotional story.

Two sisters.
One through medical problems have had three miscarriages so far so her sister decides to surrogate and carry a baby for her.
I often wonder how a woman can do that then give the baby away. I’m aware it’s for helping, self sacrifice and all that, yet still as a mom I ponder.

Those that do it for the right reasons I admire. Even if I don’t think I could.

The emotions that came with this was intense, very intense. I was right within these pages, I felt both sisters pain.

The author did a fantastic job with this storyline.

If you’ve not read this and need a weepy book, this is it. Tissues at the side.

[Dale Harcombe · Rating 4 out of 5]

Four and a half stars
Zoe McAllister has suffered all her life with Lupus. She has also had several miscarriages before she finally finds out she is unable to have a baby of her own. She is devastated. But then her half sister Nadia comes up with a solution. Though Zoe’s husband Lachlan, who is often absent with work, and Nadia’s husband Eddie have misgivings, the women are convinced the plan will work. The plan goes ahead. In the end it doesn’t work out at all as Zoe and Nadia expect.
This novel had me emotionally involved from the outset. Much of the reason for that is because the characters are so well drawn. The reader gets to experience not only the situation from Zoe’s point of view but also that of Nadia.
To me the weakest parts of the story and the hardest to read were that to do with the teenage Louise, probably because I found her hard to like. She is a selfish- absorbed and irresponsible teen. With her actions, she gives those who love her a lot of grief. I wanted to shake her and tell her to wake up to herself. However Louise’s view and actions are essential to the story. And she wasn’t the only one I wanted to shake at times, for some of their decisions, which simply shows how involved in the story I was. All the characters came across as real and three dimensional.
The story makes you think how you might respond in similar circumstances. I also liked the West Australian setting around Fremantle, Perth and Rottnest Island. A great riveting read by an Aussie author. This is my first book by this author and I would be keen to read another by her.

[Brenda · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5★s

For Zoe McAllister the heartbreak of three miscarriages plus lupus, the disease she had had since she was sixteen years old, never went away. But the day the doctor told her she would never be able to have a child was devastating – her great and overwhelming wish was to become a mother; now it would never happen. It would just be her and Lachlan growing old together without the happy laughter of children to fill their lives.

So the day that Nadia, Zoe’s half-sister offered a solution to hers and Lachlan’s heartbreak was one of confusion but tentative joy. And three long years later, Zoe was at last holding her dream in her arms. But her happiness was tempered by a ripple of unease; she was confused by Lachlan and his moodiness. Nadia didn’t seem to be herself – what was wrong? What was happening within her previously close knit family?

Seventeen years later, Louise was rebellious – into drugs, drinking, smoking; all the things she knew her parents abhorred. But she was determined to be her own person – she fought her parents every step of the way. They didn’t understand her – they had no idea how she was feeling, did they? Suddenly everything began spinning out of control as Louise discovered secrets – secrets from her past that she had no idea about. As these secrets slowly came to the surface, the fragile demeanour of Louise and her family began to crack. Would their lives ever be the same again?

This is the second novel by Aussie author Dawn Barker and I thoroughly enjoyed it. The topic was emotional and the reality of what happened was there every inch of the way. The main characters, Zoe, Lachlan, Nadia and Louise, all had flaws, some more than others. The side characters played a great part as well – but I didn’t find myself loving any one character, rather their parts were played well to complete the story as a whole. I did find myself wanting to shake a couple of them now and then though!

All in all, this is a powerful novel about love and all its emotions; plus the desire to help a loved one and the consequences of those actions. A novel I have no hesitation in recommending highly.

[Lizzy Chandler · Rating 4 out of 5]

Let Her Go by Dawn Barker

Two sisters – step sisters – one, Nadia, is happily married with three children; the other, Zoe, has suffered a debilitating illness and a number of miscarriages, and finds herself infertile. Both have reasons for wanting to have a baby: Zoe, to complete her long-held desire to be a mother; Nadia, ostensibly, to help her deserving sister. After years of counselling and legal advice, they enter into a surrogacy agreement. They are adults. They care for each other. What could possibly go wrong?

Fast forward seventeen years to a troubled teenager, Louise, who is getting busted for stealing drugs, self-harming, engaging in drunken sex and whose performance at school is deteriorating. She knows her – unnamed – parents are fighting, senses it has something to do with her, but has no idea of the trauma that followed her birth or the bitter custody dispute that tore her extended family apart.

In Let Her Go Dawn Barker – a psychiatrist by training – successfully juggles different points of view as well as jumps forward and backward in time. Throughout the novel, the reader has a sense that something really terrible could happen – or maybe has happened already – but the suspense isn’t gratuitous. It derives organically from the fraught emotional situations she forces her characters to confront. As I approached the novel’s climax, I was struck by the story’s similarity to the Judgement of Solomon, as if Barker had taken elements of this classic dilemma and brought it alive in a modern context. Both women have good claim to the child; how will the child’s best interest be served?

If Barker’s debut novel Fractured grabs the reader and forces her along a terrifying path, Let Her Go is more like a slow burn, but it’s no less powerful for that. For anyone who has yearned for a child and not been able to conceive or carry to term, the narrative is excruciatingly real at times, almost unbearable. Similarly, Barker captures the pressure on a marriage of women coping with hormones, fears and jealousies. Both Zoe and Nadia are portrayed at times in a poor (but very human) light. Zoe comes across occasionally as unreasonably demanding and judgemental towards her husband, a man with secrets who has never seemed as enthusiastic about the surrogacy and who fails to pull his weight. In portraying the deteriorating relationship, Barker uses irony to good effect: the reader is ahead of Zoe in sensing the effect of her behaviour on her husband, and waits in suspense for the explosion we fear will come. Nadia (understandably) seems at times to be selfishly blind to anyone’s needs but her own, and the reader is torn, sympathetic to her suffering, but alarmed at the lengths she is willing to go to get her way.

This review appeared first on my blog.

[Shelleyrae at Book'd Out · Rating 4 out of 5]

Zoe is devastated when she learns that the disease she has battled her entire life has robbed her of the chance to have a child of own, so when her step sister, Nadia - already a mother to three healthy, adorable children - offers to be a surrogate for Zoe and her husband Lachlan, Zoe is thrilled and determined to make it work. Three years later, Nadia places a newborn baby girl in her sister's grateful arms but is she really prepared for the reality of letting the child, her daughter, go?

Examining the ethical issues surrounding altruistic surrogacy, and the complications that can affect such arrangements, Let Her Go, by Dawn Barker, is an absorbing and thought provoking novel.

Barker's characters are believable, ordinary people with familiar flaws and insecurities. My sympathies were torn between Zoe, desperate in her desire for a child, and Nadia, whose generous intentions are corrupted by an instinct she can't control. The author portrays these two women, and their decisions and actions, with extraordinary sensitivity and compassion, acknowledging the complicated situation that extends beyond simple judgements.

"No one ever knows the effect on the future of the things we do now; we just have to do what we think is right at the time."

In including the narrative of seventeen year old Louisa, Barker adds another layer of perspective to the issue and exposes the hubris of judging what is in a child's best interest. The author asks, what happens when the child's best interest conflicts with our own ability to provide it?

Other issues touched on in Let Her Go included mental illness, disability and domestic violence. These elements help to both flesh out the characters, and the motivations for the choices they make during the story.

Part family drama, part psychological thriller, the pacing of Let Her Go is ideal, with shifting timelines drawing out the subtle, but ever present, suspense. I was never entirely sure how the story would unfold, constantly anticipating the unknown.

A compelling, poignant novel about motherhood, family, loss and love, Let Her Go is a story that is hard to let go of.

[Elif · Rating 2 out of 5]

Bazen neden ucuz kitap alıyorum diye kendime kızıyorum. Kızma sebeplerimden biri de bu oldu. Tamam, 5 tl olabilirsin. Ama biraz okunası ol ya.
Spoiler vererek kafa göz dalıyorum. Üvey kardeşi için taşıyıcı annelik yapan Nadia’nın dönekliği. Kızını elinden alırlar diye korka korka yaşayan Zoe’nun acizliği. Karısının taşıyıcı anne olmasına aldırmayan bir adet gamsız koca Eddie. Çalıştığı madende birinin ölümüne neden olunca işi bırakıp ev erkeği olmaya karar veren Lachlan. Tanrı aşkına! Bu ismi çok aramış mı yazar?
Kitabı hiç beğendim. Belki ne okuduğunu bilerek okursan olabilir. Hani bu annelikle ilgili deyip başlarsan belki. O da belki. Yayınevinin gücüne gitmesin ama olmamış. 👎🏻

[MarciaB - Book Muster Down Under · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dawn Barker is truly becoming one of my go-to authors for stories that highlight powerful emotional issues, cultivating them into stories which will have us constantly thinking, questioning and, for some of us, in this lifetime, experiencing. In Fractured, her debut novel, Dawn addressed the subject of oft-times undiagnosed post-natal psychosis. In Let Her Go, she attempts to decipher the complexities, ethics and emotional morass of altruistic surrogacy and the effects of a decision which, sadly, affects more women than we know about.

In a recent interview held with Annabel Smith here, she had this to say about the inspiration behind Let Her Go:

“I first thought about writing Let Her Go after watching a documentary about a woman with a medical illness who used a surrogate mother to have a child. In the show, her husband was very much in the background, and when the surrogate mother attended the child’s first birthday party, it was clear that she was still very much attached to the child she had carried. There was something in the body language of both women that made me wonder how they both really felt, behind their smiles.
I then heard more and more about the advances in fertility treatment, and read stories in magazines about people buying eggs and embryos overseas, then paying women to carry the children for them.
I personally felt conflicted: being a mother myself, I would never deny anyone the right to experience the joy of being a parent, but there are ethical issues to consider. I wanted to write Let Her Go to explore my own feelings about this complex issue.”

Where does the guilt end? How hard must it be to not be able to bear a child? How far would we, as women, go to have a child? How do our men really feel? These are just some of the questions that Dawn has us asking ourselves in Let Her Go, as she narrates the lives of Zoe, Nadia and Louise.

With the Prologue setting the scene against the backdrop of Rottnest Island (affectionately known by locals as “Rotto”) just off the coast of WA, the reader is automatically cast into Gothic waters as we see a woman clutching a child to her chest with the salty spray and roiling movements of the ferry and its diesel fumes assaulting her senses, intensely adding to the inner turmoil she is experiencing.

Skip back a few weeks and, in the first chapter, we are introduced to Zoe McAllister. Having developed an auto-immune disease in her teenage years, it has ultimately destroyed her chances of successfully carrying a child to full-term, and she has begun to face the bleak reality that she will never be able to bear children. While her husband, Lachlan, assures her that he loves her, despite her inability to carry and bear the children she wishes for, she can’t help but feel that she is a failure, especially since his job on the mines takes him away from home for weeks at a time, leaving her to pick up most of the pieces after each miscarriage.

Her sister, Nadia, also married with three beautiful children of her own, has borne witness to the distress and pain that Zoe suffers after each miscarriage, known in Australia as a “gestational mother’s incentive”. After much deliberation and discussion with her husband, Eddie, she comes to a decision and intervenes, offering to be a surrogate for Zoe. But this is not a quick process and it takes a further three years before Zoe is holding her bundle of joy in her arms.

However, when the unthinkable happens and Zoe’s only chance at raising a child becomes threatened, one of these women will need to harvest the power to let the child go.

Dawn, a qualified child psychiatrist, skilfully shows us all three sides of the story by presenting us with the personal dilemmas of the two families, their direct relatives, as well as those of the child. While there is no question that Louise is absolutely and unconditionally loved by Zoe, both her and Nadia discover that it’s not as easy as just signing legal documents when it becomes painfully apparent that legalities will never be able to sever the incredible bond formed between a mother and a child at conception.

To put it mildly, I was hopelessly conflicted as Dawn delved so far into the psyches of both Zoe and Nadia that I wondered whether it would all be worth it in the end. As a mother of two beautiful children myself, Dawn presents us with such a compellingly real situation that I couldn’t help but find myself empathising with both of these women - each of them on a different journey, for the love of one child.

What would I have done in their circumstances? Well, it’s not as easy to take sides as everyone thinks because each of us has their own valid thoughts on the situation and, our own perceptions as mothers and what’s best for our children, can become jaded because of the emotional ties we have with them. It must be even more difficult though when the surrogate, like Nadia, shares an even closer relationship with the mother of the child and I could understand that the insecurities must be overwhelming.

But what of Louise? She, it seems, will find herself in the midst of an identity crisis which we can only hope will have a happy ending.

While Dawn addresses the issues of surrogacy in this profound psychological novel with both a deft and sensitive hand, she also touches on many other themes from domestic violence, chronic illness, underage drinking, marital instability and alcohol abuse to psychological problems like self-harm, anxiety and depression. As we navigate today’s world filled with many hindrances to procreation and unhappy endings (particularly in relation to the current surrogacy case here in Australia featuring baby Gammy and his twin sister), it becomes all too easy to be the judge and not the judged! Although the twins’ much publicised situation bears no similarity to that of Louise, the ethical dilemmas and long-lasting effects remain the same.

[Jenn J McLeod · Rating 5 out of 5]

I could not let it go! I had to keep reading. I love books that keep me guessing and this storyline is cleverly contrived. Also enjoyed were the well drawn characters. Their motivations and conflicts had me constantly changing my opinion of who I wanted to champion. I enjoyed Fractured, but I loved Let Her go, mostly because I think I related to the story more. BUt Dawn's writing of both books make for fabulous and thought-provoking reading. Well done, Dawn for delivering another fascinating story.

[Nur · Rating 2 out of 5]

İyi bir yazım dili var, düşük puan vermek istemezdim ama çok kötüydü. Direndim, bitireyim dedim ama elime alasım gelmedi ve iki kitap bitireceğim süreyi boşa harcadım. Bu kadar iten bir kurgu, itici karakterler yazmak kolay iş olmasa gerek. Kitabın başında sizi neyin beklediğini biliyorsunuz zaten. Ve bunun siniriyle okuyorsunuz. *spoiler* Zoe'nin evlatlık çocuğu kabul etmemesi, Nadia'nın kahraman olma isteği ile gelen kararlar.Nadia'nin sonradan pişman olacağı, çocuğa da Zoe'ye de acı çektireceği çok açık. Yazar sizin Nadia ile empati kurmanızı istiyor ama mümkün değil. Kimse bunun için onu zorlamadı. Yapmasa kimse suçlamazdı. Sırf dram olsun diye böyle anlamsız bir ilişki oluşturmak çok gereksiz. Zoe geçirdiği hastalık nedeniyle psikolojik olarak dağınık, bunu anlayabiliyorsunuz ama diğer karakterlerin anlayışsızlığı sizi deli ediyor. Kitabın son yüz sayfasını okumaya dayanamadım, sadece gözden geçirdim, atlayarak baktım. Dram olacaksa bile mantıklı olsun, böyle itici, insanı sinir krizine sokan bir kurguya daha denk gelmemiştim.

[Kathryn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow! The back of the book says “LET HER GO is a gripping, emotionally charged story of family, secrets and the complications of love.” And I can testify that “gripping” and “emotionally charged” are very appropriate adjectives to use. If anything, I think this is even better than Fractured, and I gave it 5★. A word of caution, however: this is perhaps not the best book to be reading if you are very hormonal or feeling excessively emotional. It would be a difficult read for anyone struggling with infertility, especially the first four chapters. Although it might be a good read for anyone considering becoming a surrogate or engaging one as it does highlight some of the potential pitfalls, although I don’t know enough about it, and perhaps it just presents a worst-case scenario...

The characters and their circumstances are totally believable (except for about 20 pages almost at the end of the book, which I thought a bit far-fetched). It is easy to see how different situations and how people react to things can take their toll on marriages and my heart broke for Zoe and Lachlan as I read, and, to a lesser extent, Nadia.

I found it difficult to put this book down, and I’ve devoured it over a 24-hour period!

[Sue Wallace · Rating 5 out of 5]

Let her go by Dawn Barker.
Zoe and her husband Lachlan have been trying to get pregnant for years. She has had 3 miscarriages and have been told she cannot have a baby. Her sister Nadia offers to surrogate for her and gives her a girl. But can she give her up and let Zoe have her?
This was a moving and emotional read with brilliant characters. I cannot begin to understand what the family went through. Bought tears to my eyes. 5*. Highly recommended. Netgalley and canelo.

[Carol - Reading Writing and Riesling · Rating 5 out of 5]

My View:
Intense, fast moving with contemporary social issues, a great read.

Have you ever read a book where from the very beginning you go “oh no, something terrible is going to happen, I can just feel it?” This is one of those books; from the very first page I was hooked and I was on hyper alert, I just knew this narrative was not going to end well. I was conflicted, I was so engaged with the narrative, with the characters, with the plot lines but at the same time I really didn’t want to turn the next page and discover that the “worst” had indeed happened. I read about one hundred pages and had to take a break; I needed an emotion free few days before I could pick this up again and complete the read.

And what a read it is – as with Ms Barker’s earlier book, Fractured, the characterisations and psychological profiling are superb. Ms Barker weaves an intricate plot that presents the reader with many contemporary social issues to consider and to place one’s self in the characters situations and wonder “what would I do/have done, would I do things differently?”

The pace is fast, the action and drama intense and personal and yet so easily identifiable with situations in our own lives or the lives of people we know and love it breaks your heart. After finishing this book my only regret is that I will not be able to attend the Perth launch of this fantastic book. Bravo Dawn Barker, I hope the launch goes brilliantly.

[Kathy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dawn Barker, yet again, has that amazing ability to be able to get into the minds of her characters as well as the reader……loved ‘Let Her Go’ from the very first page. Zoe is inconsolable when after numerous miscarriages discovers that the disease she has battled since she was 16 has also robbed her of the chance to have a child of own. Nadia, Zoe’s stepsister and a mother of three, offers to be a surrogate for Zoe and her husband Lachlan. Fast forward three years, Nadia places newborn baby girl Louise in her sister's grateful arms but can Nadia let her baby girl go? Also, we go further forward into Louise’s life as a 17 year old girl and follow her struggles to belong….Fantastic page-turner, hard to put down…highly recommend A++

[Faye · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the second novel of Dawn Barker, I loved this one as well, touching story and interesting subject felt for all of the characters. Definitely an author I want to read more of.

[Rebecca]

Originally reviewed on Got Books, Babe?

Let Her Go by Dawn Barker is a fascinating, compulsive novel which delves deep into the complexities of surrogacy and the consequences, if it doesn’t go to plan, that may follow. Barker captures the emotion and entanglement that such an act of love can leave in its wake, and snapshots in the most moving way how regret can affect the lives of those involved not only in the present, but in the past and future also. With an abundance of serious issues dealt with by the author in a tender yet informative way, Let Her Go by Dawn Barker is a novel of two mothers caught in a web of morals and fears, of love, grief, loss, family and lastly, marriage. Barker displays to the reader just how far-reaching one act of innocent love can ricochet throughout the years and how devastating that act can turn out to be.

In Dawn Barker’s ‘Let Her Go’, readers are introduced to Zoe and Nadia, who are sisters through the marriage of Zoe’s mother, Rosemary, and Nadia’s father, Martin. The novel gets off to a heart-breaking start in which Zoe and husband, Lachlan, discover that they are unable to have children. Understandably hopeless and lost in her own thoughts, it becomes clear to Zoe’s family that she is struggling to come to terms with what she has learnt of her body, and she is unable to let it go. She and Lachlan have always dreamt of having their own children, so the news is devastating and renders Zoe silent and discouraged. That is, until Nadia, mother to three of her own children, steps forward with an idea that will allow Zoe’s happiness and fulfilment to return to her. Nadia will be a surrogate for Zoe and Lachlan’s child. Having birthed three healthy babies already, she is certain that it’s the best way to help her sister in her time of need, and isn’t this better than having someone nameless from somewhere else in the world do it for them? When Zoe hears of what Nadia is willing to do for her, she can hardly contain her happiness. She is, of course, confused at first, and cautious, but once the ball gets rolling, it quickly becomes firm in Zoe’s mind. She and Lachlan will have a baby after all, and she cannot thank her sister enough for agreeing to carry their baby for them. It’s a dream come true.

But of course, things are never quite so simple and the problems quickly begin to arise once baby Louise is handed over to Zoe and Lachlan. This is where the novel really picks up its pace and I felt myself growing more and more consumed by this gut-wrenching story the deeper I fell into it. Once baby Louise is handed over to her new parents, Nadia begins to feel things that she didn’t prepare herself for. Regret. Loss. Grief for a child that was never intended for her, but for Zoe and Lachlan instead. These emotions hit Nadia like a freight train, and before she even becomes aware of it, she can hardly bear to stay away from Louise for more than a few days at a time. Zoe begins to pick up on her sister’s desperation to be near her baby. She understands it. Nadia carried Louise so of course there is a connection between them but surely Nadia understands that Zoe is Louise’s mother? Isn’t that what the surrogacy was about in the first place?

I was utterly gripped from the moment things began to change in this novel. What is first an uplifting & wonderful idea put forward by a loving sister quickly becomes something much more challenging and treacherous for everyone involved. Zoe suddenly finds herself unwilling to leave Louise in Nadia’s desperate hands, and Nadia can’t seem to tear herself away from the baby she carried. Not only does Barker focus on the transformation between these two women, but there was so much going on in the background too. Lachlan, Zoe’s husband, has issues of his own to deal with, and Nadia can’t seem to find anyone who understands how she is feeling. There doesn’t seem to be a single soul out there who can help her as she struggles with deciding on what’s right or wrong.

I was wrapped up completely in this dramatic tale, waiting with baited breath to see how it would end for the sisters, and for Louise. Barker writes a convincing and emotionally-draining novel, one which I found myself unable to put down the closer I got to the final chapter. I realised, as I continued to turn the pages, that I was emotionally invested in these characters. I wanted what was best for each of them and couldn’t seem to relax until I finally found out how Barker would choose to end this novel. I was absolutely fascinated by these women and the situation they had come to find themselves in. It’s a novel that certainly stands out to me in this genre, because the author truly forces the reader to think deeply about the circumstances and think about what they would do in such a situation.

Hard-hitting and raw, Let Her Go by Dawn Barker provides a rich and intriguing insight into the world of two sisters and the catastrophic consequences of an innocent decision that eventually splits their once-loving relationship into two. Written boldly and with emotion aplenty, this novel will have you, too, weighing up the wrongs and rights, and placing your own opinion into the pages as you progress. Strikingly moving, Let Her Go by Dawn Barker is a novel that will remain with me for quite some time. Got Books, Babe? Is awarding Let Her Go by Dawn Barker with a rating of four stars. A must-read for lovers of gripping women’s fiction who enjoy family dramas and the topic of motherhood.

[Mel Roberts · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such an emotional story which had me in tears a number of times.

The subject of infertility affects a lot of families, not just the couple struggling to conceive. Whilst surrogacy offers a solution, its far reaching effects and consequences can be felt for a life time.

I liked the way to book covered how this affected every family member, not just Louise and her parents. More detail about her brother and sisters would have been valuable though.

I was a little disappointed that the book seemed to only cover Louise now, and her first year of life. There was no real explanation as to why she was so troubled as a teen.

Overall I enjoyed the book and would consider reading more from this author in the future.

[Lauredhel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Zoe clings to baby Louise on the Rottnest ferry:

"Zoe turned to look out to sea. She hunched over so that her chin covered the head of the baby held against her chest, as if they were one being, as if she could make enough room for the child to simply melt into the space in front of her heart, where no one could ever take her away. Is that how it would have felt to have borne her?"

As the story unfolds in shifting timelines, we find out why Zoe is escaping to Rottnest in midwinter with a baby she didn't carry. We also learn why Louise is found unconscious on Rottnest Island seventeen years later, and how the keeping of a family secret can undermine relationships and wound those kept in the dark.

One thing I loved about this book is the deep exploration of what it can mean to be a mother, from two people's points of view (there are, of course, many more!). That feeling of having a part of your heart existing outside of your body, of that incredible physical closeness to one tiny person, is a hellishly difficult one to describe, but Let Her Go has a good go at it.

And then there is the disability angle:

"She’d spent her life having to relinquish control to other people, to her illness. Not a week went by without hearing about someone who’d beaten the odds: run a marathon after shattering their spine; swum the Channel after having limbs amputated; been cured of an incurable cancer. But this wasn’t a case of showing determination; there was no miracle waiting for her around the corner if she only fought harder. If only. It was luck, bad luck."

Zoe's infertility is caused by lupus, and other characters develop issues with mental illness. This book examines the effect infertility can have on people and partnerships, and it also takes a long hard look at how ableism can wielded as a weapon against families dealing with disability, even by those who supposedly love them. This is a tough and close-to-home topic, and I feel it was done well here. Another of the more powerful aspects of the book is Zoe's experience of feeling utterly alone and despairing in her infertility and grief for her lost pregnancies, surrounded by people complaining about how exhausted they were from parenting. I was crying for her every time someone apologised, "Oopsie, that was insensitive, wasn't it?"

Another thing I adore in a book is a vivid, effective sense of place. Let Her Go is set in Perth/Fremantle, my hometown, and throughout the book the setting plays a part - the layout of the city, how the summer's heat feels, the native vegetation, and more. And of course, I love a book where the Indian Ocean plays a large part!

"[Zoe] held out her right hand, palm up, as she had been taught as a child, and looked at the silhouettes of islands on the horizon. Her thumb pointed at Rottnest; her index finger to Stragglers Rock; her middle finger to Carnac Island, where Lachlan fished, returning with stories of sea lions and tiger snakes; her ring finger to Garden Island; and her pinky to Penguin Island. The palm of her hand, right here where she lived and where her daughter now lived, was Fremantle. She smiled and curled her palm tightly closed, holding onto home, onto family."

Let Her Go is a terrifically written book, with adept pacing and just enough mystery to keep the pages turning (and turning, and turning...)

ETA: Another great thing about this book! Dawn Barker is a medico, so I didn't have to feel the urge to pick up a red pen and med-pick errors in the book. That side of it just worked.

Content notes for infertility & pregnancy loss, relinquishment, alcoholism and drug use, domestic violence, sexual consent issues, self-injury.

[Jules Farrington · Rating 2 out of 5]

Storyline
Zoe, a woman with lupus, is told she is will never be able to bear children. The story focuses on her journey through the trials and tribulations of surrogacy. It is interwoven with a story about a troubled teenager, who steals pharmaceuticals and hangs out with a rough crowd.
Likes
This definitely kept me guessing - what will be the outcome of all this drama? Will things ever get better for the family?
Dislikes
The characters and relationships were toxic - I can't name a single character that I liked. They were constantly out to bring each other down, and meddle in everyone's affairs. At the start this read like surrogacy propaganda, and while I understand that the story needed to be told in a way that explained Zoe's choice, there was some pretty awful reasons. E.g.: By the time a child's been fostered by dozens of families, not to mention the neglect and abuse that got them there in the first place, they've often got issues . Also frustrating that Zoe's lupus was hardly mentioned in the book, it seemed like an easy plot device which was discarded very quickly.

[Janine · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book had me hooked from the very beginning. Dawn's previous book "Fractured" was one of my top picks for last year, and this new one is up there as well.

The subject of surrogacy is a painful and controversial one but the author handles this issue so well, as she is a Psychologist as well as an author. You see things from all perspectives, the surrogate mother, the adopted mother (who are step sisters), the two husbands and of course the child.
As things progress in this book you can't help but feel for all parties involved and you can sympathise with each one of them.

Another wonderful thing is that the Author comes from Western Australia and cities from this area are highlighted in the book which gives an insight into this part of Australia as well. I am a huge fan of this Australian author and I think author's like Jodi Picoult should start to get worried, Dawn Barker has arrived!

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was surprised by this book. I could see where the book was going, and at one point I wondered whether I should pursue the story, but Barker flips between families and times which leaves a shadow of doubt about ones assumptions and the story becomes quite the page turner.
I found Barker's first book "Fractured" a much more compelling story, perhaps due to the subject matter and the consequences that followed, though this story is by no means less significant.
I enjoy Dawn's Barker's writing. There is an easy flow and a clear delivery in her story telling.

[Chloe · Rating 4 out of 5]

The second book I've read from this author - and I must admit to not liking it as much as Fractured. I give it 3.5 stars
Why? Some parts just seemed a little forced to me, but that said ... I LOVE that it's Australian, and I love the different subject matter (because it's not something I've read much about before).

[Allyce · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think that Dawn Barker could be the next Jodi Picoult! 'Let Her Go' is even better than her debut and 'Fractured' was pretty impressive. It was just such a difficult situation and I really felt for all the characters involved. I was so heartbroken but also really happy-it was such a bittersweet ending. I would highly recommend and I think mature readers would probably appreciate it more, especially if they have had kids themselves. Such a good read!

[Janine · Rating 4 out of 5]

I didn't enjoy this as much as Fractured but still a great read. I found Zoe annoying at times which made it harder to identify with her.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not bad! It was an entertaining read but kind of felt like it lead to nowhere! I kept waiting for something....

[Angela · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was really torn on this one. (There are some spoilers so tread carefully). It's so well written, and the plot flows so smoothly, that other than the somewhat abrupt ending, I really enjoyed reading it. However, and here's a disclaimer: I neither have nor want kids, so maybe it was for this reason that I 100% could not connect to the 2 women who were the main characters in this story. I found them alternatingly selfish, annoying, overly dramatic, and incapable of accepting the consequences of their own decisions. I think it's a mark of the writer though, that she was able to get me to react so strongly to them. Zoe, a woman who has tried and failed, after dealing with a lifelong chronic illness, to get or stay pregnant, has finally realized that her dream will never come true. (Normally, my heart aches for women like this. My choice to not have children does not mean I don't have massive sympathy for someone who wants, but can't have.) Then, her stepsister Nadia steps forward to offer to be a surrogate for her, using Zoe's husband's sperm and Nadia's egg, at least then the baby will feel like it's "Zoe's" and not some strangers. (This is where I really started to dislike Zoe. She swoops in after her step sister makes the offer, gives her husband exactly .4 seconds to get used to the idea before losing her shit that he's not leaping out of his skin with joy, and refuses to give any thought whatsoever to using a stranger as a surrogate, or adopting.) The entire family, both couples involved, go through counseling, psychological assessments, etc. Everything seems hunky dory. Even though both husbands are on the sidelines damn near screaming - HEY DON'T DO THIS IT'S PROBABLY A BAD IDEA YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO HAVE ISSUES...blah blah, they decide to proceed. It's apparent right from the birth that Nadia is not doing well. (This is where I started to really dislike Nadia. She's already given birth 3 times to 3 beautiful kids of her own, knows how she felt when they were born and can imagine how she would have felt had someone taken them, and she STILL though it was a good idea to carry a baby she'd have to give up. Nah, bruh. You made this bed, sleep in it.) Then Nadia made the brilliant decision to join a "support" group of other mother's that gave up their children, and of course they do, they all encourage her to do what she can to get her kid back. This woman actively plots and plans against someone she considers her own sister, and then when presented with the perfect opportunity because of an incident with said sister's husband, is off to the races to work with an attorney to rip her own sister's child away from her. Things escalate from there, and then its a short few chapters to the end, which I found somewhat abrupt. We get to alternate viewpoints between Zoe, Nadia, and Louise, the child and really the only innocent party in this sh** show of family dynamics.

[☘Tara Sheehan☘ · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a difficult book to read in an emotional context and I’m still not sure how I feel about it. The writing isn’t the problem, it’s just that it touches upon some really difficult subjects and as a mother I felt as if I kept putting myself in the shoes of each of these women wondering what I’d do in their shoes.

Living in the States where surrogacy is such a common practice, widely accepted across most of the country and there are very few issues I at first had some trouble understanding the foundation of the issues the characters faced. Barker does a good job of guiding her readers through this topic so you can understand the challenges faced, why and how even when you think the ink is dry on the contract and you can breathe that may not be the case.

I found myself hurting so much for Zoe at times but also being really irritated with her because she comes off very selfish and single minded in that she seems willing to destroy her marriage to have a child. Even after she finally gets that dream she continues to act in a manner only thinking of herself. Her husband begins spiraling out of control, he’s obviously having severe psychological issues but she doesn’t do anything or tell anyone what’s happening until it’s too late. It feels like she continues in that vein with her child and only finally gets help for her when her own job/life gets put into a bind. I had a lot of trouble liking this character.

Then you have Zoe’s sister Nadia who was the biological surrogate. The author set up there would be a conflict right away because it was made known that Nadia wanted more children and to stay at home so it seemed naïve to think she’d be able to hand over her biological daughter to her sister without issue. I know it seemed like Nadia was kind of being set up to be the ‘villain’ in this story but I ended up liking her more and would have ended the story differently just because of how much I preferred Nadia over Zoe.

This would be an excellent book to read in a book club to talk about the issues of motherhood, pregnancy, thoughts on surrogacy, etc. I’d be particularly curious to get a man’s point of view.

[Sandra · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was my first read by this author which I enjoyed reading from a paperback gifted to me by another reader. I found the subject to be emotional and very relevant to situations in my life and the lives of loved ones. Infertility and loss is a subject I have heard and read so much about recently in books like "A Womb in the Shape of a Heart" by Joanne Gallant, "Hold My Girl" by Charlene Carr and others over the past years. I greatly sympathized with Zoe, her losses and her longing to have a child; however I found the contract between Nadia and Zoe to be unrealistic and unfair to each of the mothers and, in all honesty, to baby Louise. I could understand if Nadia was willing and able to express the first milk to give Baby Louise the benefit of that extra nourishment, but having her actually breast feed the baby over the first few weeks created a bond which was difficult to break, and made life extremely difficult for both mothers. I think being a surrogate would be very difficult under any circumstance, but the contract and agreements in this situation seem unrealistic and impossible for the adoptive mother. I also wondered about the two birth certificates i.e. wouldn't it be more logical to have the actual DNA parents on the original birth certificate, namely Lachlan and Nadia and then have Zoe adopt with Lachlan? I would guess different countries have different rules.

Overall, an interesting read, well-written, lots of things to think about and discuss. The only mystery I saw was why Lachlan was acting the way he was, and kudos to the author, as I guessed many things, but an accident at his work site certainly was not any of my guesses. LOL I found the ending of the book a little flat and I didn't quite get 'the Ah moment'.

[Linda Tilling · Rating 4 out of 5]

A 4* review for Let Her Go by Dawn Barker which i downloaded from the Author on my kindle. "After years of struggling to conceive, Zoe and her husband face the prospect of never having a family. When Zoe’s stepsister, Nadia, offers to be a surrogate it presents the perfect solution for everyone" Sounds like a dream come true, or does it? With Zoe's husband Lachlan donating the sperm, a baby girl Louise is born and Nadia hands the baby over to her sister. However, none of them imagined just how hard it would be to know someone else was also mother to your child. As the pressure on Zoe and Nadia mounts, they make choices that there is no going back from.

This is a fascinating, compulsive novel set in Australia, which explores the complexities of surrogacy and the far reaching consequences it can have for both families. The Author beautifully captures the emotion and entanglement that such an act of love can leave in its wake, and the way that regret can affect the lives of everyone. Nadia's husband thought the process was simple; get pregnant, have the baby and hand it over to your sister. However, Nadia experiences a sense of loss, grief and desperation to reclaim Louise as her own. Whereas Zoe wants her to have as little to do with baby Louise as possible so that she can bond as her mother. The 2 sisters are caught in a web of morals and longing for a happy family which takes a toll on their marriages.

The Author brilliantly displays to the reader just how devastating one innocent act love can be and i was constantly torn between feeling sympathy and understanding for both sisters/mothers. I did not know how the book was going to end, which is a good thing for me, and i was pleased with it. But Dawn Barker certainly put me through a whole plethora of emotions and moral discussions in my head and highlighted how uncertain the act of surrogacy can be and i believe it is a book that should be read by anyone contemplating it. There are certainly lessons to be learned here.