Confronting Sexism in the Church: How We Got Here and What We Can Do About It

by Heather Matthews, Scot McKnight (foreword)

How to Fight Sexism in the Church

Despite the real progress that has been made in recent years, women continue to be silenced, wounded, and relegated to the sidelines in our churches. Many churches—even churches that outwardly affirm and platform women—remain unaware of the patterns and cultures at play that set up unseen barriers for women.

This is a book for Christians who want to learn how to do better. Heather Matthews has experienced sexism in the church firsthand. In Confronting Sexism in the Church, she explores the history and culture of sexism in our contemporary evangelical world and describes the many ways—subtle and not so subtle—that it lives on in the church today. She gives simple, practical steps for how Christians can actively fight sexism in its many forms.

The mistreatment of women has been part of the human experience from the very beginning—but in Christ, women are set free to be all they've been created to be. This book invites churches to live out that reality in all its fullness.

Genres: Womens, Theology, Nonfiction

224 pages, Paperback

Published August 27, 2024

About the author

The Rev. Dr. Heather Matthews is the Doctor of Ministry Program Manager at Wheaton College Graduate School. Dr. Matthews has also worked as a pastor, church planter, non-profit leader, and global worker for over twenty years.

Heather has a D.Min. from Fuller Seminary, an M.A. in Educational Ministry and an M.A. in Counseling Ministry from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School, and a B.S. in Biomedical Engineering from Northwestern University in Evanston, IL.

Heather’s area of expertise is women in church leadership. Heather’s broad range of personal and professional experience allows her to teach and consult on topics including abuse and trauma; gender and sexuality; healthy Christian leadership; church planting and pastoral ministry; marriage and divorce; betrayal and pornography; social and racial justice issues, cross-cultural issues, and local and global mission.

Heather has four children and lives in the Chicago suburbs.

Read an excerpt of Heather's book here:

https://www.ivpress.com/Media/Default...

Reviews

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

From the foreword to the final chapter, this book examines the reality of sexism in the church and what we can do about it. The author has clearly done careful research and she has the citations to prove it. As a woman in ministry who has lived a lot of the scenarios she described, there were sections that were painful to read because they rang so true. Her insights on what is needed to move the church forward are spot on (as are the consequences that occur when we choose to ignore the problem).

Elder boards need to read this book. Pastoral search committees need to read this book. Women’s ministry teams need to read this book. Our high school and college aged sons and daughters need to read this book.

Women are created in the image of God. God loves women. Jesus empowered women. The Holy Spirit has gifted and called women to serve the church. Will the church make space for women to flourish? Will the church benefit from men and women serving alongside one another according to their giftedness? This books shows us the need, the consequences if we don’t, and illuminates the way forward. Let’s finally move forward.

[Catherine McNiel · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is literally the story of my life. It is so important that we do actually learn to see, understand, and confront this. I would encourage anyone in church leadership, and certainly all men in church leadership, to read this carefully. I especially appreciated the last three chapters:

Chapter 9: Confronting sexism in Christian leadership

Chapter 10: Confronting sexism in a church or organization

Chapter 11: Confronting systemic cultural sexism

[Jeffrey McDowell · Rating 4 out of 5]

Matthews raises some legitimate points which must be considered and wrestled with. While I do not agree with all of her points, I did find this read eye opening and beneficial.

[Kristine Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I highly recommend this book, uncovering and exposing sexism, biases, and abuse in the Church. Only through discussion and advocacy can these issues be addressed and reformed. The book is very readable, non-technical, and fairly short, yet it is packed with useful information as well as the identification of necessary actions to improve systems and repair damage to women and the church. Pastors and men in the evangelical community should be especially encouraged to read this book and understand its implications.

Author Rev. Dr. Heather Matthews is a pastor, Doctor of Ministry Program Manager at Wheaton College Graduate School, and has a D.Min. from Fuller Seminary, an M.A. in Educational Ministry and an M.A. in Counseling Ministry from Trinity Evangelical Divinity School, and a B.S. in Biomedical Engineering from Northwestern University in Evanston, IL Despite her education and leadership skills, she has experienced sexism and abuse in and from evangelical churches. She writes as a subject matter expert and from experience.

Forward by Scot McKnight
“For the church to eradicate sexism – the systemics of sexism, and even vestiges of sexism – will require vigilance (pix).” “Women perceive these things because many are themselves victims of abuse and silence and sabotage. Women experience moments in the system differently. Women can point out what men who formed the system find invisible (pxi).”

Chapter 1: Naming the Problem
“Sexism is alive in the church and is malignant in the body of Christ because it prevents women from flourishing (p31).”

“Yet, this benevolent patriarchy still leads to unequal treatment and discrimination against women (p6).” “Christian institutions and Christian individuals were actively restricting the abundant life that I thought was available to me, and doing so in the name of Jesus. This is why Elaine Storkey says, ‘The gospel is not good news for women’ (p9).” “This is a matter of great importance. It is biblical. It is a matter of justice for half the world, and it is vital for the future of the church (p14).”

Chapter 2: What Is Sexism
“Because I was not taught as a child to identify sexism, to use my voice in the face of sexism, and to take action against sexism, when I faced sexism as an adult, I did not always recognize it, speak up against it, or take productive action for myself or others (p17).” “Because of our theology, we have been insulated from important conversations about gender and have ignored the experiences of women (p18).”

“When we are genderblind, we consciously or unconsciously ignore the dynamics of sexism. We ignore male privilege and assume that men and women have equal opportunity and experience. A similar ideology of colorblindness has played out with regard to race in America (pp18-19).”

“We can name and label women’s experiences rather than ignoring, minimizing, or rationalizing, and we can examine the systems that perpetrate these experiences (p19).” “Sexism is dislike, hostility, or unjust treatment based on sex or gender, typically against women and girls. It involves both prejudice and discrimination and encompasses a wide range of unreasonable and unfounded beliefs and unjust actions towards women, including our underlying belief that men are superior to or more valuable than women (p20).” “One in six women has been the victim of completed or attempted rape (p21).” “Androcentrism considers men as the gender-neutral standard and women as gender-specific (p24).” “Structural sexism refers to systemic inequalities related to power and resources in institutions that favor men (p24).”

“Evangelical theology that devalues women’s humanity, experience, leadership, talents, and bodies necessarily leads to sexism (p27).”

“While many women and some men have fought sexism throughout history, little has been done to structurally and systematically and holistically address these issues that have caused women immense pain throughout the history of the church (p29).”

Chapter 3: Theology of Antisexism
“If we hope to create churches and homes without sexism, we must dismantle our theology of male leadership and build a framework of belief that values women and their work in the world (p31).” “A theology of antisexism is based on three truths found in Scripture: First, women are equally created, equally chosen, and equally gifted. Second, power is given to humans not to rule over others but to share so that we might all flourish and do the work of God in the world. Third, God is unfolding his plan of redemption and restoration of all things, and God has invited us to participate in his work (p33).” “Throughout Jesus’ life, he treated women as equals with men and never restricted their roles (p36).” “Sexism is a misuse of power in which men hold power over women, and use that power for themselves while diminishing and restricting women’s God-given power (p40).”

“Throughout Scripture God is concerned about justice, and justice is a primary identifier of the kingdom of God and the people of God (p45).”

Chapter 4: A Brief History of Sexism in the Church
Matthews showcases multiple vignettes depicting the reality of sexism in the church from the Old Testament until now. “As a result [of their belief in inerrancy], fundamentalists prioritize a literal interpretation of Scripture, which was often used to support simplistic readings of the Bible regarding the role of women, and these readings came to be accepted as part of basic Christian orthodoxy (p57).” “Well-known pastor, theologian, and cofounder of CBMW [Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood] John Piper believes that Christianity should have a masculine feel. This view of God as masculine and with masculine traits has led to a version of toxic, militant masculinity that is pervasive in evangelicalism (p59).” “In each [historical] period, the church has found new ways to maintain sexism and keep women from full equality and flourishing (p61).”

“Women are still seen as sexually dangerous, created for domesticity, and unfit and unqualified for leadership in the church (p61).”

Chapter 5: A Brief History of Antisexism in the Church
“However, there is a long, rich history of antisexism in the church and women who didn’t conform to traditional gender roles (p63).” “Because may women were restricted from ministry in the church in America, they left for the mission field where they could lead and preach with freedom (p72),” “Many good historians have worked to uncover the stories of these women that were often purposefully obscured or dismissed. The stories of Black women and other women of color are even more difficult to uncover (p75).”

Chapter 6: The Price Women Pay
“This type of overt sexism is less and less acceptable in the public sphere, but it is upheld in evangelicalism and even considered biblical (p77).”

“‘It is easier to devalue and then mistreat those humans who are believed to be less like God’ (p78).”

“Women are supposed to succeed in the workplace unhindered by family and child-rearing responsibilities while at the same time continuing to take on the majority of the responsibility in the family (pp79-80).” “Many believe that an evangelical woman’s role is to support her husband’s ambitions and to provide a loving home for him, and see work at home and with the children as ‘women’s work’ (p82).” “It has been a common teaching in evangelicalism in recent years that wives must meet their husband’s sexual needs in order to keep them from being unfaithful and looking at pornography. … Once again, men’s needs are primary. Women’s needs are secondary… (p84).” “One of the most indicative signs of sexism in the church is the low number of women in leadership and pastoral ministry (p86).”

“Sadly, the evangelical church is experiencing a brain drain of female leaders because there is no place for them to lead and serve (p94).”

Chapter 7: Politics, Power, Pornography, and the Perpetuation of Sexism
“Women are viewed not only as temptations who could damage male purity but also as the antidote to men’s uncontrollable sexual desire. … They assume men cannot control their sexual desire, so women must be responsible instead (p99).”

“This objectification of women’s bodies naturally explain the current rape culture and addition to pornography by many men (p99).”

“Women’s bodies and sexuality are often seen and experienced as problems in the church (p100).”

“The Billy Graham rule is seen as wise and prudent by most, but it fails to require men to grapple with their tendency to objectify women and abuse their power over women. Again, these beliefs and practices primarily harm women who are excluded, feared, and objectified (p102).” “Fifty-seven percent of senior pastors and 64 percent of youth pastors admit to struggling with porn use (p104).” “In [Mark] Driscoll’s pornified view of marriage, men are depicted as constantly thinking about and needing sex, and wives are expected to provide pleasing sex to men in order to save their marriage, help men control their sexual desires, and even to win them to Jesus. … These views of sex make women responsible for men, make women afraid of men, and ultimately create an environment of rape and abuse (p106).” “Power imbalances make it much easier for the powerful (men) to get away with harassment and abuse, and the powerless (women) risk losing their job, reputation, privacy, financial security, community, and much more (p107).” “Victims of abuse are often held responsible for their abuse for failing to act properly feminine while men are exonerated (p108).” “According to the United Nations, as many as seven in ten women will experience physical or sexual violence in their lifetime (p109).” “Sadly, only 2 percent of rapists are ever incarcerated, and the number is even lower for partners or ex-partners, when the victim is a person of color, or when the perpetrator is a white male (p109).” “When the church is silent on issues related to domestic violence and abuse, it contributes to bad theology of male headship, and puts women in greater danger (p110).” “John Piper infamously said that a wife should endure being smacked by her husband for the greater good of saving her marriage (p110).” “More women are telling their stories of abuse in evangelical marriages and churches thanks to the #MeToo movement, but few male church leaders are listening to the real dangers that evangelical women face (p111).” “According to Lifeway, ‘Research indicates that abused women who seek help from untrained clergy typically find themselves in worse situations than before’ (p112).” “The number of evangelicals implicated in abuse scandals is staggering (p113).”

“While our culture has been moving toward greater freedom for women, the evangelical church has moved in the opposite direction by increasingly restricting women (p117).”

Chapter 8: Confronting Sexism in Relationships
“It is possible for us to have healthy sexuality that leaves space for friendship between men and women (p125).” “Segregating men and women in an attempt to prevent sexual sin is analogous to the requirement for women to hide their hair or bodies with a burqa (p126).”

“Since most men have not experienced sexism, it is easy to discount, minimize, rationalize, or ignore the experiences of women (p127).”

“Evangelical marriage is a place of privilege for men. God’s original vision for marriage is one based on partnership, equality, and mutual flourishing (p130).”

“However, in a marriage of equals, spouses both serve one another and empower one another so that each partner reaches his or her potential (p134).” “In a marriage without sexism and headship, sexual intimacy is enjoyable for both partners. The wife is not tasked to keep the man satisfied, nor is she abused in any way (p135).”

Chapter 9: Confronting Sexism in Christian Leadership
“There seemed to be no churches who welcomed me as a female leader or were willing to develop my gifts (p138).” “In order to confront sexism, we must not only address sexism in relationships but also address sexism in Christian leadership, which may be the most important and most restrictive environment for women (p138).” “Women have been fighting sexism throughout history, but they can only achieve limited change and success without the advocacy and partnership of men. … Many men have failed to use their power and influence on behalf of women (p139).”

“This is what is needed in Christian leadership – men who are habitual, courageous allies for women (p142).”

“Once women are welcomed into leadership, in order to elevate and retain gifted women, churches and organizations must invest in their leadership development (p146).” “For men, the experience of being under female leadership is essential for the development of egalitarian views and confronting sexist beliefs and actions (p149).”

Chapter 10: Confronting Sexism in a Church or Organization
“In the absence of a clear organizational commitment, individuals simply bring their personal beliefs into the organization. This leaves women in an extremely awkward and unsafe position where they are unsure if their coworkers fully celebrate their identity, leadership, and contribution (p157).” “Right theology, though, is not the only element needed in churches and organizations. Policies are needed too (p161).” “The United States is unique in the lack of support it provides to mothers and families through family-friendly policies (p164).” “There must be clear expectations regarding the respect that should be given to women in authority (p165).”

“It’s not surprising that the frequency of female preaching is extremely low since most churches have male senior pastors who are gatekeepers to the pulpit (p166).”

“Women often experience men challenging their authority, questions about their competence, and frequent suspicions about sexuality, especially in evangelical organizations (p167).” “When women are equally included in church leadership, the church’s witness to the world advances (p170).”


Chapter 11: Confronting Systemic Cultural Sexism
“We must look beyond our evangelical culture to see that systemic cultural sexism is an injustice that needs the attention of the church and people of faith. … Women suffer disproportionately because they lack power, agency, and protection compared to men and often experience further inequality because of their class, ethnicity, age, or religion (p172).” “Women and girls also face selective abortion, infanticide, child marriage, trafficking, prostitution, rape, and sexual violence in war (p173).” “When women’s lives are improved, families and communities are directly impacted because women typically invest their resources back into their families (p173).” “In the Old Testament the prophets adamantly declared that God hates injustice and that the worship of God while ignoring injustice in the world is an abomination to God (p175).”

“One of the worst forms of sexism that still exists is that women who speak up about sexual violence are routinely dismissed, discredited, and silenced (p182).”

“Very few people are willing to hold perpetrators accountable even in the face of overwhelming evidence (p183).” “May the church be known as a people who confront sexism and change the world for women (p184).”

My Conclusion
Tragically, sexism is alive and well in the Christian church and contemporary culture. Women continue to experience discrimination, sexual harassment and abuse, and barriers to flourishing as God’s image bearers. This book is a valuable and excellent resource, raising awareness of the appalling treatment of women and how this negatively impacts the witness of the church. I hope many will read this book, especially men, and will have the courage to advocate for antisexism theology, policies, and practices.

[Peridot Gilbert-Reed · Rating 1 out of 5]

Is there sexism in many churches. Yes. Is it everywhere and every breath a man speaks. No.

Matthews takes things too extreme such as with Benevolent kindness and the Billy Graham rule. As a woman who has been ministry, I can attest to various ways women can be disregarded; however, sexism is not always around every corner and under every rock as Matthews proposes.

I believe this is not a balanced look at the subject matter, but takes it to extremes. Additionally, some of the quotes in the book are from women who are not known for the Christian beliefs but rather their feminist ideology. Again, extremes.

[Cheryl Beseler · Rating 3 out of 5]

Although I am a former evangelical, I was interested in how the author described her experience as a female faith leader in the evangelical world. Her story and ideas for how to change the sexist culture that defines the church is of great interest and a monumental challenge. Although the material felt a bit redundant at times, she makes a good cause for Jesus' view that Christianity should be egalitarian and that complementarianism is not a healthy position to take to best utilize the talents of women in ministry. It was worth reading simply because it was inspiring for the case to be made.

[Dorothy Greco · Rating 5 out of 5]

I very much appreciate Matthews' premise and scholarship. Matthews exposes the embedded male bias and misogyny that continue to hold women back in many church settings. Well researched. She hits many topics that are part of this problem, including power, pornography, and sexual abuse in church settings. (As you might expect, it's not an easy book to read bcz of the content.)

[Dayla · Rating 5 out of 5]

Extremely well researched and argued. I was surprised that Doug Wilson was left out of any mentions of sexism in the church. As a lifelong evangelical church go-er, this was a great resource, at once difficult to read but hopeful. Highly recommend to anyone who cares about the future of the church, especially in America.

[Susan Howell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Heather Matthews addresses the many facets of sexism, both within interpersonal relationships and into broader spheres of organizational and systemic sexism. Her tone is one of respect and she seems to have a deep love for the church. This will be an eye-opener for those seeking to learn the extent to which sexism affects us all - individually and systemically.

[Pam · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's a revealing perspective on challenges within the evangelical church that confirms concerns I had as an attendee. I admire her courage in sharing her experiences and hope she sees the progress she envisions.

[Alana Amunrud-Sharp · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book assumes egalitarianism is correct, and as such, it could be a hard read for complementarians. But they should push through and read it anyway. The harms that have been done to women need to be seen and addressed, whatever your views on men and women in the church.

[Angela L. · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book gave me a lot to think about and consider. I do not think I agree with all that the writer has to say, but due to reading this book I have a better way to think through and consider my position on sexism in the church.

[Jen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I hope everyone reads this and then acts on it.

[Nate · Rating 5 out of 5]

Extremely important and prophetic book for the evangelical church

[Amy · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 I found her points to be occasionally overly detailed, which at times detracted from the overall message. However, I still found the book to be both challenging and enlightening overall