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کتاب کار اضطراب اجتماعی و کمرویی: تکنیکهای اثبات شده و گامبهگام برای غلبه بر ترس
کمرویی شدید و اضطراب اجتماعی شایعترین نوع اختلال اضطرابی و در واقع ناتوان کنندهترین نوع آن است به طوری که حدود پنج درصد افراد جامعه درگیرش هستند. آنتونی و سوینسون بر اساس تجارب بالینی خود در کار کردن با این افراد یک راهنمای گام به گام مبتنی بر تکنیکهای رایج درمان این حوزه با تکیه بر مبانی درمان شناختی رفتاری و درمان مبتنی بر حوزه پذیرش و تعهد، کتاب حاضر را تدوین کردهاند تا اصول تکنیکی قوی را به زبان بسیار ساده برای درمانگران و مراجعان شرح دهند.
این کتاب یک اثر ساده، روان و سلیس برای مداخلات افراد این حوزه میباشد.
این کتاب یک اثر ساده، روان و سلیس برای مداخلات افراد این حوزه میباشد.
428 pages, Paperback
First published November 1, 2000
282 people are currently reading
1986 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 28 of 29 reviews
March 3, 2018
I understand that people are justifiably suspicious of anything associated with the words "self help." But for me... I just reached a point where I was like, "Enough is enough is enough!" I needed help with my social anxiety, and I found it in this book.
The exercises in this book are easy to complete and heavily grounded in research. They are based on the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy approach, which 1) has you complete a self-assessment of your anxiety, 2) has you practice cognitive strategies to help change your maladaptive thinking patterns and 3) has you practice exposure training, in which you systematically and repeatedly expose yourself to the situations and sensations that make you nervous.
I went full Tracy Flick on this and made a binder, with a divider for each of the three parts. I've been working steadily through the book since late August, filling each section with exercises that I photo copied from the book then completed. I also added a fourth section for journaling about my progress and a fifth section for interesting articles and stuff I found that doesn't fit anywhere else.
The hardest part has been the exposure training. It's the real engine of CBT. You can reason with the rational part of your brain with things like "What's the worst that could happen?" and so on, but that anxiety-ridden part of your brain that's not so different from a cockroach's will keep right on futzing in circles until you confront the problem head on. John B. Watson did it with kids who were terrified of bunny rabbits, and I've done it to myself over my fear of getting thrown off the bus for not having the right fare. The 'C' in CBT helps you rationalize your way through your anxiety, and the 'B' helps the rest of your brain catch up. Because once you've gotten on 15 buses in a row without the proper fare, like I did, and nothing even remotely bad happened, it's pretty silly to keep thinking that #16 is going to be a catastrophe.
CBT and this book have been a revelation to me, and I can't recommended them enough. CBT, so's ya know, has also been found to work for people with depression, eating disorders, and other forms of anxiety. And if you have social anxiety but would prefer a more traditional therapist-and-medicine approach, there's information in this book about that, too.
The exercises in this book are easy to complete and heavily grounded in research. They are based on the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy approach, which 1) has you complete a self-assessment of your anxiety, 2) has you practice cognitive strategies to help change your maladaptive thinking patterns and 3) has you practice exposure training, in which you systematically and repeatedly expose yourself to the situations and sensations that make you nervous.
I went full Tracy Flick on this and made a binder, with a divider for each of the three parts. I've been working steadily through the book since late August, filling each section with exercises that I photo copied from the book then completed. I also added a fourth section for journaling about my progress and a fifth section for interesting articles and stuff I found that doesn't fit anywhere else.
The hardest part has been the exposure training. It's the real engine of CBT. You can reason with the rational part of your brain with things like "What's the worst that could happen?" and so on, but that anxiety-ridden part of your brain that's not so different from a cockroach's will keep right on futzing in circles until you confront the problem head on. John B. Watson did it with kids who were terrified of bunny rabbits, and I've done it to myself over my fear of getting thrown off the bus for not having the right fare. The 'C' in CBT helps you rationalize your way through your anxiety, and the 'B' helps the rest of your brain catch up. Because once you've gotten on 15 buses in a row without the proper fare, like I did, and nothing even remotely bad happened, it's pretty silly to keep thinking that #16 is going to be a catastrophe.
CBT and this book have been a revelation to me, and I can't recommended them enough. CBT, so's ya know, has also been found to work for people with depression, eating disorders, and other forms of anxiety. And if you have social anxiety but would prefer a more traditional therapist-and-medicine approach, there's information in this book about that, too.
April 2, 2012
Very well written and laid out. I've yet to see any substantial results and I have my doubts. I feel it will be unique to each person. I could see some benefitting next to none from this, and for some it being a life-changer. If you've reached the point where you're reading this and debating whether you should invest in it or not, then I very much recommend it. Even if its not very effective, it will at least elicit some understanding and action.
May 2, 2021
Everyone knows what it feels like to be afraid. Fear is a basic human emotion. In humans, fear is controlled, in part, by an area of the brain called the limbic system. The limbic system includes some of the deepest, most primitive structures of the brain—structures shared by many less “evolved” animals. In fact, there is reason to believe that the emotion of fear is present across most, if not all, animal species. Most organisms display specific patterns of behavior when confronted with danger and often these “fearful” behaviors include forms of aggression or escape. Therefore, the intense feelings we experience when we are exposed to an immediate danger often are called the “fight or flight” response. Although most people use the terms “anxiety” and “fear” interchangeably, behavioral scientists who study emotions assign somewhat different meanings to these and other related terms. Anxiety is a future-oriented feeling of dread or apprehension associated with the sense that events are both uncontrollable and unpredictable. In other words, anxiety is a nagging feeling that occurs when a person believes a negative event may occur in the future and that nothing can be done to prevent it. People who feel anxious tend to dwell upon and ruminate about the possibility of danger. This tendency to dwell on future negative events is called worry. Anxiety is also associated with uncomfortable physical feelings such as arousal (for example, sweatiness, increased pulse), tension (for instance, tight muscles), and pain (like headaches).
There is no question that when anxiety is too intense it can interfere with performance; however, mild to moderate amounts of anxiety are actually helpful. If you never became even slightly anxious under any circumstances, you probably wouldn’t bother doing the things that must be done. Why would you bother preparing an assignment on time, dressing nicely for a date, or eating healthy food if you weren’t concerned about the consequences of not doing these things? In part, it is anxiety that motivates us to work hard, prepare for challenges, and protect ourselves from possible threats.
In contrast to anxiety, fear is a basic emotion that occurs when an individual is confronted with an immediate real or imagined danger. Fear leads to a sudden, intense physiological alarm reaction that essentially has one purpose – to get the person away from the danger as quickly as possible. When people feel fearful, their bodies go into overdrive to ensure that escape is fast and successful. Heart rate and blood pressure increase to transfer blood to the large muscles. Breathing quickens to improve the flow of oxygen throughout the body. People sweat to cool off the body and perform more efficiently. In fact, all of these symptoms of arousal and fear are designed to make escape easier, allowing for survival in the face of danger.
Panic attack is the clinical term used to describe the experience of intense fear that takes place even though no realistic danger is actually present. Panic attacks can be triggered by specific situations that people fear (for example, giving an oral presentation, being in a high place, seeing a snake) or they sometimes occur out of the blue, without any obvious trigger.
To summarize, fear is an emotional reaction to an immediate danger, whereas anxiety is a state of apprehension about some future threat. For example, worrying about giving a presentation that is a week away is a reflection of anxiety, whereas experiencing an adrenaline rush while in the midst of giving a presentation is usually an example of fear.
___________________________________________
If any of you guys have a social anxiety disorder, shyness, or feel insecure all of the time then this book may help you immensely. Read this book or simply put your situation in the comment box, I'll help you out.
There is no question that when anxiety is too intense it can interfere with performance; however, mild to moderate amounts of anxiety are actually helpful. If you never became even slightly anxious under any circumstances, you probably wouldn’t bother doing the things that must be done. Why would you bother preparing an assignment on time, dressing nicely for a date, or eating healthy food if you weren’t concerned about the consequences of not doing these things? In part, it is anxiety that motivates us to work hard, prepare for challenges, and protect ourselves from possible threats.
In contrast to anxiety, fear is a basic emotion that occurs when an individual is confronted with an immediate real or imagined danger. Fear leads to a sudden, intense physiological alarm reaction that essentially has one purpose – to get the person away from the danger as quickly as possible. When people feel fearful, their bodies go into overdrive to ensure that escape is fast and successful. Heart rate and blood pressure increase to transfer blood to the large muscles. Breathing quickens to improve the flow of oxygen throughout the body. People sweat to cool off the body and perform more efficiently. In fact, all of these symptoms of arousal and fear are designed to make escape easier, allowing for survival in the face of danger.
Panic attack is the clinical term used to describe the experience of intense fear that takes place even though no realistic danger is actually present. Panic attacks can be triggered by specific situations that people fear (for example, giving an oral presentation, being in a high place, seeing a snake) or they sometimes occur out of the blue, without any obvious trigger.
To summarize, fear is an emotional reaction to an immediate danger, whereas anxiety is a state of apprehension about some future threat. For example, worrying about giving a presentation that is a week away is a reflection of anxiety, whereas experiencing an adrenaline rush while in the midst of giving a presentation is usually an example of fear.
___________________________________________
If any of you guys have a social anxiety disorder, shyness, or feel insecure all of the time then this book may help you immensely. Read this book or simply put your situation in the comment box, I'll help you out.
unfinished
March 13, 2015Shyness may not be a disorder, but it sure is an inconvenience.
January 1, 2016
You know a book is going to be tremendously helpful to you when the very first story is pretty much written for you. The first story in this book is about a woman who is nervous about her wedding. She is not necessarily worried about the actual marriage but the ceremony, she doesn't like being the center of attention. This story had me pegged! Not only does this workbook go through different senarios but is full of advice to give a person self-confidence.
The workbook is full of journaling lines to recognize areas that maybe you didn't know you needed help in. It also has charts to fill out so that a person can start to see patterns and to see how to order situations in to easy to hardest to deal with. There are scales to fill out, areas to checkmark and questions to answer.
As a SAHM of 3 and a homeschooler I do not have the time or money to seek clinical help. This book has been a great help in dealing with areas that I need help in.
I received this book for free in exchange for my honest review. All opinoins are my own.
The workbook is full of journaling lines to recognize areas that maybe you didn't know you needed help in. It also has charts to fill out so that a person can start to see patterns and to see how to order situations in to easy to hardest to deal with. There are scales to fill out, areas to checkmark and questions to answer.
As a SAHM of 3 and a homeschooler I do not have the time or money to seek clinical help. This book has been a great help in dealing with areas that I need help in.
I received this book for free in exchange for my honest review. All opinoins are my own.
January 1, 2020
I never knew how normal and okay my anxiety was, until i read this book, recognized all the symptoms and related behaviors. I have always thought that I have one of a kind hard-awkward-personality suffering from many different things.
This book taught me that all i was having is social anxiety alone, nothing more, nothing less, nothing abnormal.
It is always good recognizing your conditions in details it really helps you heal.
It was recommended to me by my therapist who way too nice to insist i read this, however, after reading it i think i would insist recommending it for others suffering from shyness and social anxiety.
This book taught me that all i was having is social anxiety alone, nothing more, nothing less, nothing abnormal.
It is always good recognizing your conditions in details it really helps you heal.
It was recommended to me by my therapist who way too nice to insist i read this, however, after reading it i think i would insist recommending it for others suffering from shyness and social anxiety.
July 17, 2014
This book has proven to be a good resource outlining for adult clients how worry, fear and panic adversely affect life and work. It interrupts interpersonal and performance situations. The author uses as cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) approach that we know works for many kinds of anxiety.
Strategies such as journaling, exposure, monitoring forms, symptom reduction testing forms, goal setting, working with automatic thoughts (the cognitive piece), and understanding the diagnostic criteria are all featured in the pages of this book. Worth the read if you struggle with shyness and social anxiety.
Strategies such as journaling, exposure, monitoring forms, symptom reduction testing forms, goal setting, working with automatic thoughts (the cognitive piece), and understanding the diagnostic criteria are all featured in the pages of this book. Worth the read if you struggle with shyness and social anxiety.
October 6, 2022
One of my children struggles significantly with shyness and social anxiety and this truly helped to understand and learn new techniques for dealing with it.
He's now really making strides in socialising and has joined various clubs at school.
I'm truly grateful to the author for this opportunity to understand the issues that lie behind anxiety and how to deal with them.
He's now really making strides in socialising and has joined various clubs at school.
I'm truly grateful to the author for this opportunity to understand the issues that lie behind anxiety and how to deal with them.
January 31, 2024
Not sure why this was gifted to me but it was ok ig
July 15, 2025
I'm not usually one for self-help books, but a friend recommended this one, and I'm glad I gave it a shot. It's straightforward and doesn't use a lot of fluff.
The book makes it clear that social anxiety is a pretty common thing. It breaks down why you feel the way you do in social situations—the physical stuff like sweating or shaking, the thoughts you have, and how you try to avoid things.
What I found most useful was the idea of questioning your own anxious thoughts. It guides you through a process of figuring out if your fears are actually realistic. It's about looking at the evidence, which sounds a bit clinical, but it's actually just a practical way to stop your mind from running wild.
It also talks about facing the things that make you anxious, but in a gradual way. You start with small steps, like making eye contact with a cashier, and work your way up. The idea is to prove to yourself that the bad things you're imagining usually don't happen.
This workbook gives you a good understanding of what's going on in your head and a solid plan for how to start tackling it. It's not a magic fix.. it takes work.
While this book is great for understanding the bigger picture of anxiety, I did find myself wishing for more on just the basics of starting and holding a conversation. For anyone who feels the same, especially younger guys just trying to figure out how to navigate social stuff without it being a big deal, a book I heard about called The Unspoken Challenge by R.D. Peter might be a good next step. It sounds like it's more focused on just mastering small talk and building confidence from the ground up.
The book makes it clear that social anxiety is a pretty common thing. It breaks down why you feel the way you do in social situations—the physical stuff like sweating or shaking, the thoughts you have, and how you try to avoid things.
What I found most useful was the idea of questioning your own anxious thoughts. It guides you through a process of figuring out if your fears are actually realistic. It's about looking at the evidence, which sounds a bit clinical, but it's actually just a practical way to stop your mind from running wild.
It also talks about facing the things that make you anxious, but in a gradual way. You start with small steps, like making eye contact with a cashier, and work your way up. The idea is to prove to yourself that the bad things you're imagining usually don't happen.
This workbook gives you a good understanding of what's going on in your head and a solid plan for how to start tackling it. It's not a magic fix.. it takes work.
While this book is great for understanding the bigger picture of anxiety, I did find myself wishing for more on just the basics of starting and holding a conversation. For anyone who feels the same, especially younger guys just trying to figure out how to navigate social stuff without it being a big deal, a book I heard about called The Unspoken Challenge by R.D. Peter might be a good next step. It sounds like it's more focused on just mastering small talk and building confidence from the ground up.
July 1, 2020
I don’t know why I was thinking this book would have a lot of in-depth stuff to it. It really doesn’t. Basically you go through and fill in all the answers about how highly triggered you are by certain situations, and you have a few lines here or there to write about past experiences, or what goals you have for the future. There are sections about the definition of social anxiety and the types of therapies and medications that help. I did feel somewhat reassured knowing that other people have negative thoughts and expectations of outcomes of situations but overall this book is just that: a book. Gotta change your mindset to positive and/or neutral flexible thoughts. Overall I felt this was a waste of money.
Want to read
March 12, 2021Manual práctico para el tratamiento de la timidez y la ansiedad social
Manual práctico para el tratamiento de la timidez y la ansiedad socialUno de los mejores libros para aprender a superar tus miedos con una de las terapias que ha demostrado científicamente su eficacia: la cognitivo-conductual. Mediante un sistema paso a paso y varios ejercicios prácticos descubrirás tus fortalezas y aprenderás a cambiar tus pensamientos negativos por otros más realistas, mientras empiezas a exponerte gradualmente para dejar atrás tus temores. Y todo avalado por investigaciones psicológicas.
Te lo recomiendo si: quieres vencer tu timidez y mejorar la confianza en ti mismo aprendiendo a controlar racionalmente tus pensamientos. Valoración 8/10.
Manual práctico para el tratamiento de la timidez y la ansiedad socialUno de los mejores libros para aprender a superar tus miedos con una de las terapias que ha demostrado científicamente su eficacia: la cognitivo-conductual. Mediante un sistema paso a paso y varios ejercicios prácticos descubrirás tus fortalezas y aprenderás a cambiar tus pensamientos negativos por otros más realistas, mientras empiezas a exponerte gradualmente para dejar atrás tus temores. Y todo avalado por investigaciones psicológicas.
Te lo recomiendo si: quieres vencer tu timidez y mejorar la confianza en ti mismo aprendiendo a controlar racionalmente tus pensamientos. Valoración 8/10.
June 17, 2024
I found a few of the tools and systematic ways to combat anxiety to be helpful, but it wasn't anything that I hadn't learned before. I saw that this was highly recommended, but I imagine it is far more helpful for those who have never really examined the origin of their anxiety and/or for those who don't have a lot of experience with CBT.
I did like rereading more about "the door experiment" and making the connection between that and the Spotlight Effect. I want to focus on remembering that others notice far less details about us compared to what we can often fixate on about ourselves!
I did like rereading more about "the door experiment" and making the connection between that and the Spotlight Effect. I want to focus on remembering that others notice far less details about us compared to what we can often fixate on about ourselves!
April 23, 2023
I have been reading this book for months and slowly applying the strategies consistently and I can definitely feel the improvements ( the fact that I am making this comment is prof) it's not a book that's gonna turn you into master communicator in work and personal life but if you are suffering with social I think it's definitely worth a shot
December 4, 2020
Also found in abandoned book pile. Seems like solid advice. Talks about building up your tolerance to anxiety-inducing situations and managing your negative thoughts. Lots of resources in the back for further study.
April 22, 2021
Same old techniques in every self help manual for anxiety ever written. On the plus side, has a list of some ideas for exposure therapy. In the negative, it really shows its age when anything related to the internet shows up.
Read
November 27, 2023No sé cómo calificar este libro, así q no lo wa hacer.
Práctico, útil, un poco simplista uwu, pero muy detallado en la perspectiva desde la q se trabaja. Para revisitar
Práctico, útil, un poco simplista uwu, pero muy detallado en la perspectiva desde la q se trabaja. Para revisitar
Read
April 17, 2024it has a lot of technics to use that you can bit your shyness and your anxity. I think anyone muts read it.
Read
July 16, 2024Available at the TAMU-SA Library:
https://tamusa.on.worldcat.org/oclc/1...
https://tamusa.on.worldcat.org/oclc/1...
Want to read
June 20, 2017Please do not read yet I have not finished book.
It has good information so far. I am not wild about the textbook style and it doesn't have a personality and especially when it needs to in the personal accounts (I hate to say it but they feel made up, don't feel like real people. I've heard the stories too many times before.) As for one of the very first personal accounts presented about a young woman afraid to get married at the altar because so many people would be watching her... I can understand that. I have even thought about that myself if and when I ever get married. But my question is... How did she manage to get in a relationship w/ social anxiety? So many skip over that. I have had dates myself. But I won't lie it dies makes me nervous. Still. After this many years. Especially if I am attracted to him. I still think about a guy I knew right after college. I let my social anxiety get in the way there. I just thought it was my red hair and tendency to blush! Ha! Ha! Anyway, I hope as I read on the "personal accounts" seem more real instead of composites. I have issues going to the hair dresser, for instance. Having to make the small talk or even the weird silences is terrible. But I am realizing, oh yeah, "me too." I will finish my review soon & rate the book. Right now it is a 3/5.
It has good information so far. I am not wild about the textbook style and it doesn't have a personality and especially when it needs to in the personal accounts (I hate to say it but they feel made up, don't feel like real people. I've heard the stories too many times before.) As for one of the very first personal accounts presented about a young woman afraid to get married at the altar because so many people would be watching her... I can understand that. I have even thought about that myself if and when I ever get married. But my question is... How did she manage to get in a relationship w/ social anxiety? So many skip over that. I have had dates myself. But I won't lie it dies makes me nervous. Still. After this many years. Especially if I am attracted to him. I still think about a guy I knew right after college. I let my social anxiety get in the way there. I just thought it was my red hair and tendency to blush! Ha! Ha! Anyway, I hope as I read on the "personal accounts" seem more real instead of composites. I have issues going to the hair dresser, for instance. Having to make the small talk or even the weird silences is terrible. But I am realizing, oh yeah, "me too." I will finish my review soon & rate the book. Right now it is a 3/5.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 3, 2013
This book was recommended to me by a therapist who uses it to inform her own practice. The books includes a comprehensive, yet brief overview of the disorder. The cognitive-behavioural strategies are clearly and concisely presented, and the suggestions for exposure exercises are excellent. It seems like this would be a very helpful resource for individuals wishing to overcome shyness and social anxiety. Of course, merely reading the book will not help. Insight alone is not enough; if you want to improve your anxiety, you must consistently and persistently practice the techniques to alter your thoughts and behaviours.
February 25, 2014
Skimmed some and read other parts. Seems really good, but I don't think it will be that helpful to me personally. I'm already doing all the things that he suggests for my post-social events anxiety. I did pick up some references to other books and some good tips for my ATLOSCon 2014 talk on Social Skills. I guess I just expected more surprises, you know?
Currently reading
March 22, 2010Chapter Six, which is about identifying and changing anxious thoughts and behavior, is amazing. I think I will be referring to this periodically for the rest of my life, and that probably every single person on the planet could benefit from reading it.
February 9, 2021
This book provides the foundations of Cognitive Behavior Therapy methodology to overcome difficulties.
3 methods are proposed:
- Exposure to anxiety provoking situations
- Challenging current beliefs and replacing with more probable ones
- Development of appropriate communication skills
3 methods are proposed:
- Exposure to anxiety provoking situations
- Challenging current beliefs and replacing with more probable ones
- Development of appropriate communication skills
August 23, 2021
Some basic CBT coupled with advice to put yourself out there under the name of exposure and...some helpful tips on how to make a presentation? You might want to try therapy if you want to get your money's worth. This book is just too simplistic and shallow for my taste.
October 9, 2012
This should be recommended reading for anyone with SA.
June 20, 2015
super
Want to read
May 20, 2010Recommended by Ali for patients
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