How to Speak Brit: The Quintessential Guide to the King's English, Cockney Slang, and Other Flummoxing British Phrases

by Christopher J. Moore

The quintessential A to Z guide to British English—perfect for every egghead and bluestocking looking to conquer the language barrier
 
Oscar Wilde once said the Brits have "everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language."
 
Any visitor to Old Blighty can sympathize with Mr. Wilde. After all, even fluent English speakers can be at sixes and sevens when told to pick up the "dog and bone" or "head to the loo," so they can "spend a penny." Wherever did these peculiar expressions come from?
 
British author Christopher J. Moore made a name for himself on this side of the pond with the sleeper success of his previous book, In Other Words . Now, Moore draws on history, literature, pop culture, and his own heritage to explore the phrases that most embody the British character. He traces the linguistic influence of writers from Chaucer to Shakespeare and Dickens to Wodehouse, and unravels the complexity Brits manage to imbue in seemingly innocuous phrases like "All right." Along the way, Moore reveals the uniquely British origins of some of the English language’s more curious sayings. For Who is Bob and how did he become your uncle? Why do we refer to powerless politicians as “lame ducks”? How did “posh” become such a stylish word?

Part language guide, part cultural study, How to Speak Brit is the perfect addition to every Anglophile’s library and an entertaining primer that will charm the linguistic-minded legions.

Genres: Nonfiction, Language, Travel, Reference, Linguistics, British Literature, Writing

128 pages, Hardcover

First published September 11, 2014

About the author

Also writes under C.J. Moore.

Reviews

[Petra X · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Tea Ceremony Unlike Japan, the tea ceremony often has no witnesses, but it has certain laid-down steps which must be done exactly for it to be a 'nice cup of tea'.
1. If there is any water in the kettle it must be poured out and refilled with fresh water.
2. Boiling water is poured into the teapot to 'warm the pot' and swirled around and then poured out.
3. Tea leaves are added, one teaspoon per cup and one for the pot.
4. Water that has just come to the boil is added and allowed to brew. Some people pop on a tea cosy at this point. It seems to be a family thing. Mine didn't.
5. The tea pot is brought to the table or into the room where guests are assembled if this is tea-as-a-meal.
6. Now we have the great division: milk in first or afterwards. My family were milk in first which is silly as you don't know how much you need to get the tea to the exact colour you like since you don't know how strong the tea is. So milk in first or not, the tea is poured and milk added or the tea cups are passed around and people add their own milk. And sugar, always granulated white sugar (or sweeteners these days).
7. In family company, the biscuits are now passed around and everyone dunks their Digestives or Rich Tea (which dissolve leaving muck at the bottom of the tea cup if you aren't really fast) and says 'what a nice cup of tea'.
8. Should it be time for a second cup, someone might say, "I'll be mother" which means they are going to pour the tea.

Note: the above is the Tea Ceremony, if guests are invited it will be between 4 pm and 4.45 pm. It might also be performed at 11 a.m. for elevenses which is a nice cup of tea with something to eat, often a biscuit to dunk, or perhaps some cake, not sandwiches. That's only for afternoon tea. And they have to be dainty. Big slabs of rough cut whole grain with cheese and pickle are not for afternoon tea not even for builders who will be happy with a packet of biscuits. Builder's tea is very strong tea, lots of tannin, very dark with lots of sugar and served only in big mugs.

Afternoon tea is served in cups with matching side plates, and the milk jug and sugar bowl should either be metal or part of the china set. Honey, agave syrup and brown sugar do not fit into the Tea Ceremony. Tea bags may be used instead of tea leaves but not for Earl Grey but people will be more pleased to know that their hostess has gone for real tea leaves. And lemon wedges instead of milk can be served with Earl Grey.

Only Americans drink Lady Grey whatever that is and it is never, ever herb tea of any kind. Guests would be horrified to be served chamomile and linden tea along with the Bourbon creams and squashed fly biscuits. The British do not know anything about sun tea because it is a sacrilege to pour water not boiling over tea, and there isn't enough sun anyway, since the chances are it's either grey or raining. A tea bag in a mug (with boiling water, never just hot) is acceptable alone or with friends in the kitchen, but nice and convenient as that might be, the British Tea Ceremony persists.

Russian tea with lemon. A biblical diversion My family drank Russian tea after lunch, which is very weak black tea with lemon. This is not because we come from Russia, which we do, but because my Jewish family kept kosher and did not eat dairy products after meat.

This comes from the biblical injunction to not cause pain to animals. It is from the story of Sarah, who to gain advantage for her son Isaac over Ishmael cooked a meal of goat kid cooked in its mother's milk to make it tender, since Abraham was very old, blind and probably toothless. Abraham had made a covenant with God that Sarah's first born would be his heir, but his favourite and eldest child was Ishmael, son of Hagar and Sarah was worried he would renege on that promise.

So Jews do not eat dairy food after flesh because it would have caused the nanny goat great pain to have her kid killed and cooked in her own milk in front of her. (We are talking tents here with the livestock gathered around, not buying cuts of meat from the butcher's in the supermarket along with a carton of milk).

It worked though. Abraham made Isaac his heir as he was supposed to do. Ishmael and his mother Hagar (of whom Sarah was jealous since she was young and beautiful in the way concubines are when the wives are old and wrinkly) got cast out into the wilderness. God took pity on them and said never mind, and told Ishmael he would be the father of a 'great and mighty nation' - the Arabs. So he did all right too, better really, since they got the oil and there's a lot more of them than there are Jews. Hitler murdered one-third of the entire Jewish population of the world

The book was a small, eclectic selection of English words and phrases common in the UK but often not fully understood by foreigners who speak a very slightly different form of English. Instead of exploring each phrase exhaustively, like me and the Tea Ceremony, much is mysteriously left out.

For example on wellies aka Wellington boots, the history is given, and that people who work in wellies like farmers wear black ones and call people sneeringly, 'green wellies' meaning they are middle class green-wellie wearers and don't actually do any manual work requiring the boots. But then where I thought we'd get a bit more on wellies, like 'give it some welly' meaning put some effort into it, or put your foot down on the accelerator (mash gas) or the horrible 'give him the welly' - kick him when he's down.

There was also 'white van man' which is explained as a stereotype for an inconsiderate, aggressive driver, but fails mystifyingly, to identify them as tradesmen or people with small commercial enterprises, like plumbers and builders going about their business (and thinking everyone else on the road is being a bit of a "Sunday driver" and needs to move out of their way).

The last chapter, 'XXXX-words (noun). Rude or censored words that cannot be mentioned within the pages of this book for fear of causing offense,' makes me think the book was directed at Americans because Fuck is a perfectly acceptable word on British TV and Gordon Ramsay who gets beeped out in the US every second or two, doesn't even bother saying it in UK programmes. Also because the correct spelling of Offence is with a c for a noun, unless it is American, then it's the same as the verb, an S.

I would like an American to read this book and write a review. It would be interesting to see it from the target audience perspective. This is a 3.5 star book to me, rounded down, but to an American it might be a lot more interesting and get a higher rating.
__________

Notes on Reading This is quite funny in two ways. If you aren't British, but American, say, the book is accurate and possibly quite amusing in its explanation of English words and phrases, If you are British though, it is quietly hilarious, very tongue in cheek. This is a particularly British humour and I think, but I might be wrong, that if you aren't British, you probably won't even notice it.

I got the book as a filler between the science books and my broken heart, it's almost as good as having a big Easter Egg filled with... Quality St (I liked the purple brazil nut one, and the green triangle chocolate). Why did I say that? Because I am feeling deprived. There are no Easter eggs of any kind on the island this year.

[Julie · Rating 3 out of 5]

A pleasant read and a nostalgic look back to bygone days of time spent growing up in England. The terms were all familiar to me. One of the most endearing is "pottering" (noun, verb). As the author writes, "Do not be misled into thinking that pottering means filling your time in trifling ways - it is a national occupation." In other words, the purpose of going out to work to earn a living is so that one can come home and 'potter' about the garden, their creative space, which they defend against neighborhood pets and other nuisances.

[Sally · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked this book because it didn't overload you with many British phrases and their meanings, but important, mostly heard of words, each with a brief history or just background. I totally recommend this book to those who would like to add a little Brit to their talk or just want get a little bit more understanding of the basic British slang. I'm so glad to have received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads :)! Those who don't necessarily find thick dictionaries appealing should go ahead and give this book a try!

[Lex · Rating 3 out of 5]

A fun quick read. I loved reading about the origins of some common and not-so-common British idioms... like "posh," or "Port Out, Starboard Home," which was the location of the cooler berths on ships back to England from India, occupied by those with the cash to afford them.

As someone who is already an Anglophile, there was not enough new in here for me to make it truly meaty, and many of the British phrases were familiar to me as an American English speaker. I think non-native English speakers would benefit more from this than I did, but I did like it.

[Veva Jack]

I LOVE this book!! If you don't have it you should buy it! It's amazing!

[Heather · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fun, but many of the phrases were already familiar. I do want to start using “Sweet Fanny Adams” though.

[Natalia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was so fascinating!
I might need to get this one.

[Justine Olawsky · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the sort of little, randomish book that one always feels a bit guilty about counting as a 'book.' It took maybe 2 hours to read through, and while charming and fun, it certainly was neither challenging nor substantial. However, when one is chugging toward a 60-book goal this year, one is likely to go ahead and count any wood-pulp-and-book-glue concoction with a front and back cover and an ISBN. So, one did; namely, I did.

If you love all things British, you will like this book muchly. If you do not, then you will probably think that these Brits are pretty self-absorbed with their own insularity, quirks, and foibles. I tend toward the former way, of course, but the latter makes sense to me, too. Maybe my reading lists lately have been too full of "Brits on Brits." We get it already. You're all very clever with words and you use hypocrisy as an art and you like to queue. OK, so that little rant might lead you to think that I did not actually enjoy this book as much as the 4 stars would suggest. Ah, but I did, and not even in the curate's egg sort of way, but in its entirety.

First of all, "the curate's egg" -- an expression I had never heard before reading this collection, but one so evocative, I can hardly wait to incorporate it into my banter. Curate's egg, a noun phrase that describes something good in parts, but not on the whole. It comes from a cartoon from 1895 wherein a curate is eating breakfast with his bishop and is struggling to finish his egg. His bishop remarks, "I'm afraid you have a bad egg, Mr. Jones." The poor curate with all deference and anxiety makes eager reply, "Oh no, my Lord, I assure you that parts of it are excellent!" That is a useful sort of idea -- the gentle put-down.

Also, I was gratified to learn the apocryphal history of one of my favorite British expressions, "Bob's your uncle." I actually had someone say this to me when giving me directions in London a couple years ago. It thrilled me to the tips of my toes. It originally began, perhaps, in an act of nepotism in a government appointments, and the idea of how easy it is to hold a job when "Bob's your uncle."

There are countless other phrases and words that will fascinate and maybe even flummox. The author's voice, which plays a gentle editorializing role, is likable and not particularly intrusive. There is very little about Cockney rhyming slang (you would think it would take up a larger part of the book, based upon the subtitle) which is fine by me. I am not a fan of that linguistic tic. Just say 'hat' you weirdos.

[Kelly-Louise · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a fun, humorous little book about British sayings. If you are an Anglophile at all, or if you enjoy learning about the history of languages, you will enjoy this. I had never heard of the Cockney rhyming slang before, which was pretty fascinating. Now that I've read it, I will ship off my copy to my English mother since it will surely give her a chuckle or two.

The one British saying I didn't get an answer to in this book is the term "donkey's years." So, I looked it up online at http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/do.... And lo and behold, it seems to have come about because of Cockney rhyming slang:

Donkey's years

Meaning

A very long time.

Origin

A query at the Phrases and Sayings Discussion Forum asked if the British slang term for 'a very long time' was donkey's years or donkey's ears. My first thoughts were, "donkey's years of course - what would ears have to do with it?". It turns out that I was being rather hasty. Donkey's years is now the more commonly used slang term when meaning 'a long time', but donkey's ears, although used little in recent years, has been a jokey alternative for some time - certainly from the early 20th century, viz. E. V. Lucas' Vermilion Box, 1916:

"Now for my first bath for what the men call 'Donkey's ears', meaning years and years."

This slightly pre-dates the earliest printed version that I can find of donkey's years, in the US newspaper The Bridgeport Telegram, 1923:

"With a heavy make-up, you'll be the cutest vamp I've seen in donkey's years."

It is quite likely that donkey's ears was the earlier form and that it originated as rhyming slang, in an allusion to the length of the animal's ears. Donkey's ears/years is often shortened just to donkeys. That is characteristic of rhyming slang, as in syrup (of figs) - wig or plates (of meat) - feet.

Donkey's ears works as rhyming slang whereas donkey's years doesn't. In rhyming slang the last word of a short phrase is rhymed with the word that gives the slang meaning; for example, trouble and strife - wife, apples and pears - stairs, etc. It makes little sense for the phrase to have originated in slang form as donkey's years, as that would rhyme 'years' with 'years'.

The migration from donkey's ears to donkey's years was no doubt aided by the belief that donkeys live a long time. There's some truth in that. Lively Laddie, a donkey who had lived up to his name for many years while plying his trade on Blackpool Pleasure Beach was, until his death at age 62, a contender for the 'oldest living donkey' title.

[Bookworm · Rating 3 out of 5]

Midly amusing book. This short little book looks at some common (and not so common) British words and phrases. It's arranged roughly by theme with words associated with that particular theme (food, people, language, manners and mannerisms, etc.). The explanations are relatively short (a paragraph or a bit more) and moving onto the next entry.
 
That's basically it. It's perhaps more helpful if you've not as familiar with some of the words/phrases and might make a good gift for someone who is going on a trip to the region/studying abroad, or someone who has a particular interest in language/linguistics. It isn't exactly groundbreaking though and you can find other books of a similar nature (I think 'Stuff That Brits Like' is very similar to this in format).
 
Not much more to say. I bought it cheap and am glad I did so. Otherwise I'd recommend the library but I wouldn't rush out to read it either.

[Lori · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cute little book explaining common British phrases and words. I’ve been reading a lot of UK based books lately so it was helpful. However many of the “British” words and phrases covered aren’t limited to use by the Brits, and are things I’ve said since I was a child (as an American).

[Mahesh Naidu · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's a good book for someone who is traveling to the big mighty aka Britain. It helps with the local slangs and peculiar English terms used in Britain. It is more like a dictionary of such words/terms

[Tandie · Rating 2 out of 5]

Almost nothing that wasn't common knowledge to Yanks. The meanings of Brit phrases and words were explained in a tedious, boooooring way.

[Eve · Rating 3 out of 5]

Charming little book. I love the paper and design, but I expect more of the content.

[Abhidev H M · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lot of surprises

[Janet · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had this on my To Read because it sounded interesting, I'm a borderline Anglophile and it was available at my library so decided to give it a go. Surprisingly, I use a fair amount of these on a regular basis which may be because I've picked them up from books, shows & movies set in the UK.

It was interesting to find out that POSH actually started as an acronym (like WHARF-ware house at river front) and meant Port out, starboard home. The phrase All Mouth and No Trousers is like one we use here in Texas, All Hat & No Cattle and they mean the same thing.

If you aren't familiar with the Britishisms then this is an informative little book to pick up. If you are familiar, then it's neat to see how these sayings/words came about.

[adie n · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was a very interesting and funny book! It offered a lot of insight into the meanings and history of some of the words and phrases that British people are often quoted for!

[Scott Haraburda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Goodreads First Reads Giveaway Book.

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How to Speak Brit: The Quintessential Guide to the King's English, Cockney Slang, and Other Flummoxing British Phrases is a fun quick read of a dictionary of common British phrases.

The book contains a brief description of linguistics and the history of Great Britain, along with complete definitions. I was expecting it to be list of unique phrases and words, along with their definitions and usages. Instead, it was a few, which demonstrated to me how our two countries' shared language differs. Nevertheless, I plan to add some to my lexicon.

The author is Christopher J. Moore, a writer, poet, translator and editor of both adult and children's books. He is known for writing In Other Words: A Language Lover's Guide to the Most Intriguing Words Around the Worldin 2004 and other books from across the pond.

How to Speak Brit is good addition to one’s Anglophile's library.

[Tom Donaghey · Rating 2 out of 5]

I won HOW TO SPEAK BRIT: THE QUINTESSENTIAL GUIDE TO THE KING’S ENGLISH, COCKNEY SLANG AND OTHER FLUMMOXING BRITISH PHRASES by Christopher J. Moore through Goodreads and found it amusing, informative and at times a bit droll, but no where did it come across as a true "How To" book your DIY guy or gal would use.
Here is a collection that is, by premise, words or phrases that should baffle the average American when confronted with same, but I didn’t feel challenged by the definitions by and large with the possible exceptions of Bluestocking, doolally, soppy and maybe Lollipop man and a few others. And I find it difficult to believe that doolally is used or know by most Brits.
Still there was a fair bit of amusing word play here and on the whole the definitions provided, as well as the history lessons, were enlightening and fun.
If you are traveling to Great Britain and want an essential guide to assist you through the journey, I suggest you find a good drinking mate and totter along with them to see you though. Find and attractive one and well, there you are or, as said in Brit-speak, Bob’s your uncle.

[Phair · Rating 3 out of 5]

Won an ARC of this in GR Giveaways. Not as good as I'd hoped. Arranged in thematic chapters w/ 20 or so words or phrases explained in each such as "send someone to Canterbury"' "semi-detached"' "elevenses"' "at sixes & sevens" . We get probable origins for the term, how it evolved to current meaning, etc. Maybe because I read a lot of British fiction and watch a lot of British TV I was familiar with many of the phrases some of which are also common in US so it had a been there already feel to it. Almost seemed aimed more at the British market rather than outsiders.
The ARC had horrible faded text which was also tiny. The B&W woodcut-like illus also seemed faded. There was a good opening chapter on language, society and changes to common usage. The book did frequently give some good historical context but overall it provided both too much and too little content to be satisfying. For a more fun look at British colloquialisms see the glossary in any of Louise Rennison's hilarious juvenile novels.

[Shelly Donaghey · Rating 4 out of 5]

How to Speak Brit is not a guide book to the language but more of a collection of interesting stories about some of the less common words and sayings within the English that is spoke in England. Some of the words are so very common that they have long ago jumped the ocean and are in everyday use here. Other entries intrigue the reader but the solution to the puzzling statements are clearly explained. The third type of entry are those obscure tidlings which I suspect the author had to work hard in tracking down, and not only the meaning of the thing but an actual living person who has used it in the past 20 years.
But the writing is light and breezy for the most part, some of the inclusions are either fun, head-scratching or suspect as to the veracity of the actual reality of the word. Nonetheless, an enjoyable read, NOT recommended as the end all or be all in the world of linguistics, but a nice read while riding the train.
I owe this book to a Goodreads win.

[Kathy Cohen · Rating 4 out of 5]

As someone who's fascinated with linguistics in general, I loved this book. Moore's light, airy, and amusing style of writing combined with his vast knowledge of linguistics and the history of Great Britain are wonderful. Here's a particular favorite: "Eavesdropper. Before gutters and street drains were in common use, houses had wide eaves to allow rain to fall far from the walls and windows. Going right back to Old English, this extended roof was known first as the eavesdrip, and later as eavesdrop. A passerby, standing under the eavesdrop, would be likely to hear conversations from within the house without the knowledge of those inside. Hence eavesdroppers were those who listened in to private conversations. In the British code of behavior, this simply isn't done, except of course, these days, in the interests of national security." The droll little observations Moore makes are great!

[Dakota · Rating 3 out of 5]

I actually enjoyed this book, with the exception of some things. I am going to England soon and thought this book would be helpful to use throughout England. Although I feel like some British people don't even know these words, so I sent a couple to my friends who lived in England and they didn't even know them! I think Britain has evolved enough to where they don't say a lot of these words. Another issue I had was that there were sexual terms in this book, I'm a more "younger" teen and I don't enjoy many of the sexual terms throughout I book I thought I was going to be in love with. I have a weird obsession with England a.k.a an Anglophile, but at least it got me in the spirit. Overall, this book is ok, I don't recommend reading it with a family with younger children (although you can just skip the words), but overall it was a decent reading experience, but at least the cover is cute!

[Rae · Rating 3 out of 5]

“Phrases” is the operative word here. The book contains a goodly number of them with accompanying explanations as to etymology and usage. Quite entertaining. I was pleasantly surprised to know of most of them.

[Ana Carolina · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was ironically written in North American grammar.

A fast read, interesting for foreigners and students of English, a good book of curiosities, may make you a bit hungry and wishing you could go to London. Although painfully aware of the still persistent class distinction in Britain.

[Whitney Terrell · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a birthday gift from a friend since I couldn't go to England for my 30th birthday. It was quick and informative, and now I know a few words and phrases that I can identify when I do go someday.

[Una Rose · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great and fun but left me wanting more. Still interesting and very worth reading.

[Dipra Lahiri · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quick and amusing read, but nothing that the readers will not know. Word origins where provided are interesting.

[Steve · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cute little book to give someone as a gift.

[Nikita Nautiyal · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some interesting facts - the expression ‘ Blighty ‘ originated from the Hindi word ‘ vilayati ‘ !