What do you think?
Help Your Child Succeed in School
In a completely revised and updated edition of his classic parenting guide, nationally recognized expert John Rosemond offers practical advice and methods for setting your kids on the path to success in school as early as age three.
For more than forty years and counting, family psychologist and best-selling author John Rosemond has been counseling parents about how to help children do their best in school. This new book draws on all of that knowledge and experience so that parents can set their kids on the path to success in education, even at age three. Dealing with common problems like how much and what kind of help to give with homework, what to do when a child misbehaves in school, and how to deal with academic performance that consistently falls below a child’s ability level, Rosemond addresses every issue with time-tested advice and methods.  Other books on schoolwork encourage lots of parental involvement. Not this one. Rosemond’s approach will help parents disengage from homework and other hassles as they manage their children to even greater success in the classroom.
 
Describing his behavior management strategies that are used by school systems all over the country, he writes with an entertaining, compelling style that will keep parents reading the valuable, helpful information in Help Your Child Succeed in School, and the book promises to earn high marks for both parents and children.
For more than forty years and counting, family psychologist and best-selling author John Rosemond has been counseling parents about how to help children do their best in school. This new book draws on all of that knowledge and experience so that parents can set their kids on the path to success in education, even at age three. Dealing with common problems like how much and what kind of help to give with homework, what to do when a child misbehaves in school, and how to deal with academic performance that consistently falls below a child’s ability level, Rosemond addresses every issue with time-tested advice and methods.  Other books on schoolwork encourage lots of parental involvement. Not this one. Rosemond’s approach will help parents disengage from homework and other hassles as they manage their children to even greater success in the classroom.
 
Describing his behavior management strategies that are used by school systems all over the country, he writes with an entertaining, compelling style that will keep parents reading the valuable, helpful information in Help Your Child Succeed in School, and the book promises to earn high marks for both parents and children.
- GenresParenting
224 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 5, 2014
About the author
John Rosemond
52 books74 followersJohn Rosemond has worked with families, children, and parents since 1971 in the field of family psychology. In 1971, John earned his masters in psychology from Western Illinois University and was elected to the Phi Kappa Phi National Honor Society. In 1999, his alma mater conferred upon John the Distinguished Alumni Award, given only once per year. Upon acceptance, he gave the commencement address.
From 1971-1979, he worked as a psychologist in Illinois and North Carolina and directed several mental-health programs for children.
From 1980-1990. John was in full-time practice as a family psychologist with Piedmont Psychological Associates in Gastonia.
Presently, his time is devoted to speaking and writing. John is syndicated in approximately 225 newspapers nationwide. He has written eleven best-selling parenting books. He is also one of America’s busiest and most popular speakers and most certainly the busiest and most popular in his field. He’s known for his sound advice, humor and easy, relaxed, engaging style.
In the past few years, John has appeared on numerous national television programs including 20/20, Good Morning America, The View, The Today Show, CNN, and CBS Later Today, as well as numerous print interviews.
All of his professional accomplishments aside, John is quick to remind folks that his real qualifications are that he’s been married to the same woman for over forty years, is the father of two successful adults, and the grandfather of seven children…make that seven well-behaved grandchildren.
From 1971-1979, he worked as a psychologist in Illinois and North Carolina and directed several mental-health programs for children.
From 1980-1990. John was in full-time practice as a family psychologist with Piedmont Psychological Associates in Gastonia.
Presently, his time is devoted to speaking and writing. John is syndicated in approximately 225 newspapers nationwide. He has written eleven best-selling parenting books. He is also one of America’s busiest and most popular speakers and most certainly the busiest and most popular in his field. He’s known for his sound advice, humor and easy, relaxed, engaging style.
In the past few years, John has appeared on numerous national television programs including 20/20, Good Morning America, The View, The Today Show, CNN, and CBS Later Today, as well as numerous print interviews.
All of his professional accomplishments aside, John is quick to remind folks that his real qualifications are that he’s been married to the same woman for over forty years, is the father of two successful adults, and the grandfather of seven children…make that seven well-behaved grandchildren.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
April 24, 2018
I'll keep this book in mind for when Squirt really gets into the thick of things at school. Some good advice, I think. I'll have to test it out to be sure. Basic commonsense stuff. Rosemond's point seems mainly to be that we are to help our children be capable and responsible for themselves, to feel the consequences of their choices and learn the skills to fend for themselves and feel the competence and self-regard that comes from having done something independently. Sounds reasonable to me.
July 13, 2017
Having taught children from NZ Year 5 through to 11, I have had quite a bit of experience with children, parents and factors for success in school. In my experience, a child’s success comes down in a large extent to parenting. Some parents are more concerned with keeping their child happy than developing their character, so will go into bat for the child against the teacher when the teacher dares to mention issues of character. Other children come from homes where they have Mummy always sitting with them helping them with every little thing. They procrastinate and muck around and Mum becomes an enabler in this. Then the teacher gets blamed for ‘too much homework.’ So I tell you this book was like a breath of fresh air to me and I wish every parent of school age children would read it.
In the introduction, Rosemond points out that as parental involvement in homework has increased, student achievement across the demographic spectrum has declined. He argues that heavy parental involvement in a child’s homework is detrimental for a number of reasons. Firstly, it incentivises the child to not pay attention in class, second when responsibility for homework is shared, the child does not feel ownership and does not put in as much effort. Thirdly, the parent (usually mum) ends up being an enabler, by doing things the child is well capable of himself. Fourthly, the more this happens, the more the mother tends to personalise performance, making her more likely to complain about what she feels are unfair grades for her child.
The first chapter speaks about building strong foundations for educational success. Rosemond argues that the preschool years are important in forming the template that will determine the level of success a child experiences in school. He points to research that shows that the best thing parents can do to help their child succeed in school is to stay married, not IQ, demographics or whether you played Baby Mozart to your child in the womb. A marriage centred family (as opposed to a child centred one) provides a child the best chance of success. In addition to a strong marriage, family life also is a predictor of success for a child.
Simply put, students who pay attention, follow instructions and work hard do better. These traits are present in homes where parents discipline lovingly, yet authoritatively. Rosemond argues that to develop the necessary responsibility in school, parents need to require their children to be responsible for chores around the home from age 3 and up. Responsibility in the home leads to responsibility in school, leads to success. A child who has no responsibilities at home will not be a responsible student. So get your children doing jobs. This is more important than having them be a part of sports teams or extra-curricular activities. Manners are another important aspect of educational success as is obedience. Finally he points to the importance of helping your child develop resourcefulness, since school is a problem-solving environment.
So how does a parent develop resourcefulness? Rosemond gives a number of recommendations including, don’t become your child’s playmate (occasionally is fine, but the less you entertain, the more the child needs to become resourceful at entertaining himself), don’t buy your child too many toys, don’t let them be dependent on electronic media for entertainment (since these do not develop any competency skills and are addictive), and administer vitamin N (No) liberally.
Ultimately, argues Rosemond, a child’s performance in school reflects the degree to which his parents have succeeded in preparing him for the responsibilities his teachers expect from him. To help your child at school, build strong foundations for learning by teaching the three Rs of Respect, Responsibility, and Resourcefulness. Teachers can only capitalise on what parents have already accomplished and reinforce at home.
Unfortunately, when problems pop up in school, they usually stem from precedents that have been set in the family from before the child’s fourth birthday, particularly in the areas of responsibility and autonomy. Parents who pick up after their toddlers, feel it is their responsibility to entertain their little child or feel they are responsible for getting their child to sleep (rocking him, co-sleeping….) are setting their child up for difficulties at school. If a child has not learned to take responsibility in small areas at home, he will struggle at school, and when he brings home homework, guess who will end up having to take responsibility for that?!
Rosemond also tackles the issue of homework. Parents of less motivated students often complain to me about the amount of homework I set, and whether homework is valuable. But Rosemond argues that aside from strengthening academic skills, regular homework teaches students important life skills needed in adulthood. It teaches responsibility, autonomy, perseverance, time management, initiative, self-reliance and resourcefulness.
But this does not take away the stress of homework from a parents end. In the next chapter, called “Ending the Hassle” Rosemond looks at effective management of homework. He begins by comparing parent-participants with parent-consultants. Parent participants hover over their children trying to prevent mistakes. They assume responsibility for the homework, fostering dependence and sending negative messages to the child. In contrast, the parent-consultant is available, but allows the child to experience frustration and assigns the responsibility for homework to the child. This helps foster independence and send positive messages to the child.
The approach to homework is to be remembered by the mnemonic ABC. A stands for “all by myself”. A child should not work in the kitchen or the family area but in a private space where he has all the equipment he needs. This prevents a child from making his homework issues the family's issues in a nightly 'soap opera'. B stands for “back off”. The parent should not hover or help, or even determine when the homework should begin, but rather let the child work on his own. Help can be given if the child comes from his private work space to you with all his books and equipment. You should not go running up to him when he needs help. Help should only be given if it is legitimate – the child truly is stuck and has given things a go. Even in these instances, a parent should only help by clarifying directions, demonstrating or giving an example of a procedure or reviewing work for accuracy. Parent help should be brief, no more than 10 minutes per night, even if this means the child does not get all their homework completed. It should never provide a child with a shortcut, and should never involve an emotional exchange. If this is occurring the parent should tell the child they can sort it out tomorrow with the teacher, or ring a friend to get help. C stands for “Create Limits”. Parents should not help a child with every question or problem they have in homework realising that about 80% of the time when a child asks for help, he doesn’t need help at all, but is simply unwilling to expend the energy necessary to figure something out for himself when he has an easier option. Therefore, parents should follow the 20% rule. They should help for no more than 20% of the set homework. Furthermore, they should set upper limit on how long a child is permitted to do homework. No homework after a certain time at night helps teach a child time management. Ultimately the research backs up this approach. In the largest-ever study of the relationship between parental involvement and child achievement, researchers discovered that parental homework help did not correlate with high scores on standardised tests, and was likely to bring down a child’s overall achievement.
He does make comments about how much homework should be given, arguing for I think 30-45 minutes in primary years, and 2 hours ish in high school. He refers to studies that suggest it is best to distribute total learning time into a number of separate brief practice periods.
Another section of the book deals with ADHD where Rosemond argues that ADHD is not a verifiable physical disorder. Interestingly in this section he argues that none of the ADHD medications have ever reliably outperformed placebos in double-blind clinical trials. Rosemond suggests there are incentives to schools to diagnose children with ADHD. He refers to a book he has written on the subject. Definitely on my reading list.
The book contains some excellent case studies of parents dealing with children who are unwilling to exert themselves in homework or who have become dependent on a parent to help them in a nightly homework marathon, or who are not taking their responsibilities at school seriously for example not bringing necessary books home. While his approach may not be PC, it is effective. The only question I have in my mind is whether parents in such a pansy PC world would have the guts to follow through on his suggestions.
The question and answer section at the end of each chapter is interesting although a lot of the material is repeated. Overall a fabulous resource for parents and teachers.
In the introduction, Rosemond points out that as parental involvement in homework has increased, student achievement across the demographic spectrum has declined. He argues that heavy parental involvement in a child’s homework is detrimental for a number of reasons. Firstly, it incentivises the child to not pay attention in class, second when responsibility for homework is shared, the child does not feel ownership and does not put in as much effort. Thirdly, the parent (usually mum) ends up being an enabler, by doing things the child is well capable of himself. Fourthly, the more this happens, the more the mother tends to personalise performance, making her more likely to complain about what she feels are unfair grades for her child.
The first chapter speaks about building strong foundations for educational success. Rosemond argues that the preschool years are important in forming the template that will determine the level of success a child experiences in school. He points to research that shows that the best thing parents can do to help their child succeed in school is to stay married, not IQ, demographics or whether you played Baby Mozart to your child in the womb. A marriage centred family (as opposed to a child centred one) provides a child the best chance of success. In addition to a strong marriage, family life also is a predictor of success for a child.
Simply put, students who pay attention, follow instructions and work hard do better. These traits are present in homes where parents discipline lovingly, yet authoritatively. Rosemond argues that to develop the necessary responsibility in school, parents need to require their children to be responsible for chores around the home from age 3 and up. Responsibility in the home leads to responsibility in school, leads to success. A child who has no responsibilities at home will not be a responsible student. So get your children doing jobs. This is more important than having them be a part of sports teams or extra-curricular activities. Manners are another important aspect of educational success as is obedience. Finally he points to the importance of helping your child develop resourcefulness, since school is a problem-solving environment.
So how does a parent develop resourcefulness? Rosemond gives a number of recommendations including, don’t become your child’s playmate (occasionally is fine, but the less you entertain, the more the child needs to become resourceful at entertaining himself), don’t buy your child too many toys, don’t let them be dependent on electronic media for entertainment (since these do not develop any competency skills and are addictive), and administer vitamin N (No) liberally.
Ultimately, argues Rosemond, a child’s performance in school reflects the degree to which his parents have succeeded in preparing him for the responsibilities his teachers expect from him. To help your child at school, build strong foundations for learning by teaching the three Rs of Respect, Responsibility, and Resourcefulness. Teachers can only capitalise on what parents have already accomplished and reinforce at home.
Unfortunately, when problems pop up in school, they usually stem from precedents that have been set in the family from before the child’s fourth birthday, particularly in the areas of responsibility and autonomy. Parents who pick up after their toddlers, feel it is their responsibility to entertain their little child or feel they are responsible for getting their child to sleep (rocking him, co-sleeping….) are setting their child up for difficulties at school. If a child has not learned to take responsibility in small areas at home, he will struggle at school, and when he brings home homework, guess who will end up having to take responsibility for that?!
Rosemond also tackles the issue of homework. Parents of less motivated students often complain to me about the amount of homework I set, and whether homework is valuable. But Rosemond argues that aside from strengthening academic skills, regular homework teaches students important life skills needed in adulthood. It teaches responsibility, autonomy, perseverance, time management, initiative, self-reliance and resourcefulness.
But this does not take away the stress of homework from a parents end. In the next chapter, called “Ending the Hassle” Rosemond looks at effective management of homework. He begins by comparing parent-participants with parent-consultants. Parent participants hover over their children trying to prevent mistakes. They assume responsibility for the homework, fostering dependence and sending negative messages to the child. In contrast, the parent-consultant is available, but allows the child to experience frustration and assigns the responsibility for homework to the child. This helps foster independence and send positive messages to the child.
The approach to homework is to be remembered by the mnemonic ABC. A stands for “all by myself”. A child should not work in the kitchen or the family area but in a private space where he has all the equipment he needs. This prevents a child from making his homework issues the family's issues in a nightly 'soap opera'. B stands for “back off”. The parent should not hover or help, or even determine when the homework should begin, but rather let the child work on his own. Help can be given if the child comes from his private work space to you with all his books and equipment. You should not go running up to him when he needs help. Help should only be given if it is legitimate – the child truly is stuck and has given things a go. Even in these instances, a parent should only help by clarifying directions, demonstrating or giving an example of a procedure or reviewing work for accuracy. Parent help should be brief, no more than 10 minutes per night, even if this means the child does not get all their homework completed. It should never provide a child with a shortcut, and should never involve an emotional exchange. If this is occurring the parent should tell the child they can sort it out tomorrow with the teacher, or ring a friend to get help. C stands for “Create Limits”. Parents should not help a child with every question or problem they have in homework realising that about 80% of the time when a child asks for help, he doesn’t need help at all, but is simply unwilling to expend the energy necessary to figure something out for himself when he has an easier option. Therefore, parents should follow the 20% rule. They should help for no more than 20% of the set homework. Furthermore, they should set upper limit on how long a child is permitted to do homework. No homework after a certain time at night helps teach a child time management. Ultimately the research backs up this approach. In the largest-ever study of the relationship between parental involvement and child achievement, researchers discovered that parental homework help did not correlate with high scores on standardised tests, and was likely to bring down a child’s overall achievement.
He does make comments about how much homework should be given, arguing for I think 30-45 minutes in primary years, and 2 hours ish in high school. He refers to studies that suggest it is best to distribute total learning time into a number of separate brief practice periods.
Another section of the book deals with ADHD where Rosemond argues that ADHD is not a verifiable physical disorder. Interestingly in this section he argues that none of the ADHD medications have ever reliably outperformed placebos in double-blind clinical trials. Rosemond suggests there are incentives to schools to diagnose children with ADHD. He refers to a book he has written on the subject. Definitely on my reading list.
The book contains some excellent case studies of parents dealing with children who are unwilling to exert themselves in homework or who have become dependent on a parent to help them in a nightly homework marathon, or who are not taking their responsibilities at school seriously for example not bringing necessary books home. While his approach may not be PC, it is effective. The only question I have in my mind is whether parents in such a pansy PC world would have the guts to follow through on his suggestions.
The question and answer section at the end of each chapter is interesting although a lot of the material is repeated. Overall a fabulous resource for parents and teachers.
October 17, 2015
Great read - it gave me a lot to think about with my own children.
It made me realize that my husband and I are doing a lot of things right, but we have a lot we can improve on too.
It made me realize that my husband and I are doing a lot of things right, but we have a lot we can improve on too.
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews