Yearning to be Free

by Kerry Dashnaw

While in her teens Kerry Dashnaw meets a group of conservative Catholic nuns. Enamored by their long habits and mysterious lifestyle she joins the order after graduation from high school. Determined to get close to God she finds that life behind the convent walls is not what she had hoped or expected. Confronted with manipulation, abuse and finally disillusionment, the author relates how she navigated her life into her twenties and early thirties. Through the help of a psychotherapist, she regains a sense of purpose and creates a new life for herself. In this spiritual memoir we experience thevulnerability and emotional journey of a young woman who yearns to be free to make her own choices.

341 pages, Paperback

Published February 21, 2024

Reviews

[emma jordan · Rating 4 out of 5]

The memoir of the woman who was my first grade teacher! She tells the story of becoming a nun at 17, her experience in a strict and hypocritical environment, and the circumstances that eventually led her to leave the convent and Catholic faith altogether and come to a true, saving faith in Jesus.
A sad, though fascinating and impactful read that ultimately ends with true hope.

[Christina Haas · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been looking for books about former Catholics and what experiences they had to cause them to leave. I was grateful to find this book, and was hooked from the first chapter.

It must have taken the author a great deal of courage to relive her days as a nun in order to share this story. I am grateful that she did. Her honesty, strength and beauty shine through.

[Lynne Powell · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fascinating look into life in a convent. Kerry spent 14 years of her life in a very restrictive order. While this does not represent life in all Catholic orders, it is an in- depth look at this particular order. Well written and totally engrossing, it speaks to those trying to recreate themselves after trauma.

[Vicki Holt · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book follows the life of Kerry Dashnaw as she becomes a nun in a very strict order when she graduates from high school at age 17 until she left the order 14 years later. I was fortunate enough to get to hear Kerry and her husband Peter speak at a book gathering at my church. She changed the name of the order and people’s names for legal reasons but the events in the book are true. She went through a lot of psychological issues and needed therapy to help her adjust. I was amazed by what was allowed to happen. It is an excellent read.

[Deborah L Lee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read!!

Very interesting and informative account of life as a nun in this particular congregation during the time before the order made needed changes in its practices and treatment of members. Though a sincere effort is made to keep from identifying the specific order, I think it was probably the Carmelites based in the Los Angeles area.

[Debbie Levis · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was so honestly and well written. I could not stop reading it. For anyone growing up Catholic during the Vatican II era (as I was) it is so familiar and brings back many (not good) memories. The author has written an honest and relateable memoir

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I did not appreciate her reformation reference and insinuating that Catholics aren’t saved/going to heaven. Up until the last part I appreciated her experience and being vulnerable. She laid out well that other orders are joyful/peaceful which was a proper view but found (as a Jesus worshiping Catholic) the reformation slam at the end was incredibly insulting.