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Timber Creek Academy #1
Promises of Forever
Life can change on a dime.
Childhood tragedy left Koa Burgard with many scars. Reclusive and still healing, he is sent to summer camp, where the other kids tease and bully. All except the outgoing, popular boy from his cabin. A boy who dreams about being a hockey star. A tentative friendship forms. Every summer, they reconnect for adventure. Every winter, they write letters back and forth.
Promises are made, and promises are shattered.
Thirty years later, the sudden death of his parents brings Jersey Reid home. Rotten things keep happening. His life has been full of torment and pain, and he can’t remember a time when he was happy.
Will it ever stop?
Cleaning out his deceased parents’ house, he uncovers his and Koa’s pen pal letters. Can Jersey recapture the happiness and innocence of youth by reconnecting with the strange, quirky boy he befriended at camp so long ago? Or will the mistakes he made before be a barrier?
Although Koa is now a respectable English teacher at an elite boarding school, Jersey quickly learns that the boy with dark secrets from camp is more troubled than ever.
Koa has given up on happiness. His views on life are bleak and disturbing, and he’s learned it’s better to be alone in an unforgiving world.
Jersey’s return offsets Koa’s balance and brings the past back into focus. A past he’s spent a lifetime trying to forget.
But Jersey was his savior once. He was kind when no one else was. Jersey made him feel safe in an unsafe world.
Until he broke a promise.
And promises are supposed to be for forever.
** Promises of Forever is an angsty MM romance with the following themes. Second chance love, hurt / comfort, jock and nerd dynamic, opposites attract, mental health. **
Childhood tragedy left Koa Burgard with many scars. Reclusive and still healing, he is sent to summer camp, where the other kids tease and bully. All except the outgoing, popular boy from his cabin. A boy who dreams about being a hockey star. A tentative friendship forms. Every summer, they reconnect for adventure. Every winter, they write letters back and forth.
Promises are made, and promises are shattered.
Thirty years later, the sudden death of his parents brings Jersey Reid home. Rotten things keep happening. His life has been full of torment and pain, and he can’t remember a time when he was happy.
Will it ever stop?
Cleaning out his deceased parents’ house, he uncovers his and Koa’s pen pal letters. Can Jersey recapture the happiness and innocence of youth by reconnecting with the strange, quirky boy he befriended at camp so long ago? Or will the mistakes he made before be a barrier?
Although Koa is now a respectable English teacher at an elite boarding school, Jersey quickly learns that the boy with dark secrets from camp is more troubled than ever.
Koa has given up on happiness. His views on life are bleak and disturbing, and he’s learned it’s better to be alone in an unforgiving world.
Jersey’s return offsets Koa’s balance and brings the past back into focus. A past he’s spent a lifetime trying to forget.
But Jersey was his savior once. He was kind when no one else was. Jersey made him feel safe in an unsafe world.
Until he broke a promise.
And promises are supposed to be for forever.
** Promises of Forever is an angsty MM romance with the following themes. Second chance love, hurt / comfort, jock and nerd dynamic, opposites attract, mental health. **
11 pages, Audible Audio
First published February 29, 2024
301 people are currently reading
1081 people want to read
About the author
Nicky James
75 books2,238 followersI live in the small town of Petrolia, Ontario, Canada and I am a mother to a wonderful teenage boy (didn't think those words could be typed together...surprise) and wife to a truly supportive and understanding husband, who thankfully doesn't think I'm crazy.
I have always had two profound dreams in life. To fall back hundreds of years in time and live in a simpler world, not bogged down by technology and to write novels. Since only one of these was a possibility I decided to make the other come alive on paper.
I write mm romance novels that take place in fantastical medieval type settings and love to use the challenges of the times to give my stories and characters life.
I have always had two profound dreams in life. To fall back hundreds of years in time and live in a simpler world, not bogged down by technology and to write novels. Since only one of these was a possibility I decided to make the other come alive on paper.
I write mm romance novels that take place in fantastical medieval type settings and love to use the challenges of the times to give my stories and characters life.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 217 reviews
February 15, 2025
I expected angst and pain. What I didn't expect is the prevailing sadness, the nihilistic outlook. I wasn't sure I could get through this story. The first 40% or so was slow going.
Jersey and Koa were childhood friends. They hung out for several seasons at a boys' summer camp, where Jersey was the popular athlete and Koa the sensitive, awkward freak who screamed in his sleep and had fits of rage.
Some thirty years later, Jersey is a retired hockey player and physical therapist, and Koa is a successful doctor of philosophy who teaches at a prestigious boarding school. Jersey has been through the wringer: pain med addiction, divorce, estranged son, deceased parents with whom he never made amends.
But Koa ... Koa struggles with deeper demons. Something happened to Noah before he went to live with his cruel, religious grandfather. It's not difficult to approximate the tragedy in your mind, but we aren't privy to the reveal until the very end, when Koa shares a box of newspaper clippings with Jersey.
Jersey is determined to reconnect with Koa, but Jersey broke a promise and Koa's heart and Koa is none too eager to rekindle a relationship of any kind.
I skimmed most of the chapters that took place at summer camp in the late 80s/early 90s. I don't find flashbacks compelling, and there were so many here.
The tone of the book is gloomy and heavy, devoid of sunshine. Koa doesn't believe life has meaning or that happiness is real. Why be happy when life is meaningless? He's a hard-core atheist, a morose philosopher, with only his cat and one-time lover, Niles, for company.
Jersey works hard to break down Koa's barriers, but Koa feels nothing.
The last few chapters really turned the story around for me. I connected more with the MCs, especially Koa and trusted that they'd be okay. But it's a long road to get there.
I adored Niles and am glad that he's getting his own story; god knows he deserves it for his loyalty to Koa and selflessness in letting Koa go.
In terms of the reveal about Koa's past, I wanted to know The point of the story is the AFTER, not the before, but I needed more to understand Koa.
I struggled with how to rate this book. I can't say I enjoyed it, but that's not always the point of literature. In the end, I decided on 4 stars because The Promises of Forever is evocative, beautifully written, and has stayed with me through days or rumination.
Jersey and Koa were childhood friends. They hung out for several seasons at a boys' summer camp, where Jersey was the popular athlete and Koa the sensitive, awkward freak who screamed in his sleep and had fits of rage.
Some thirty years later, Jersey is a retired hockey player and physical therapist, and Koa is a successful doctor of philosophy who teaches at a prestigious boarding school. Jersey has been through the wringer: pain med addiction, divorce, estranged son, deceased parents with whom he never made amends.
But Koa ... Koa struggles with deeper demons. Something happened to Noah before he went to live with his cruel, religious grandfather. It's not difficult to approximate the tragedy in your mind, but we aren't privy to the reveal until the very end, when Koa shares a box of newspaper clippings with Jersey.
Jersey is determined to reconnect with Koa, but Jersey broke a promise and Koa's heart and Koa is none too eager to rekindle a relationship of any kind.
I skimmed most of the chapters that took place at summer camp in the late 80s/early 90s. I don't find flashbacks compelling, and there were so many here.
The tone of the book is gloomy and heavy, devoid of sunshine. Koa doesn't believe life has meaning or that happiness is real. Why be happy when life is meaningless? He's a hard-core atheist, a morose philosopher, with only his cat and one-time lover, Niles, for company.
Jersey works hard to break down Koa's barriers, but Koa feels nothing.
The last few chapters really turned the story around for me. I connected more with the MCs, especially Koa and trusted that they'd be okay. But it's a long road to get there.
I adored Niles and am glad that he's getting his own story; god knows he deserves it for his loyalty to Koa and selflessness in letting Koa go.
In terms of the reveal about Koa's past, I wanted to know The point of the story is the AFTER, not the before, but I needed more to understand Koa.
I struggled with how to rate this book. I can't say I enjoyed it, but that's not always the point of literature. In the end, I decided on 4 stars because The Promises of Forever is evocative, beautifully written, and has stayed with me through days or rumination.
February 20, 2024
Wow!!!! Promises of Forever is a powerfully emotional slow-burn second-chance romance. I felt so much for these characters, their journey, and their eventual reconciliation. Jersey and Koa are two complicated guys who shared four summers at camp when they were children and reconnected thirty years later. In thirty years many life-changing moments occurred, but what remained was their affection and fondness for one another.
In a fated moment, Jersey decides to reconnect with his long-lost childhood pen pal, which begins one of the most heartfelt second-chance romances I have ever read. They are both haunted by their past, but together they finally feel connected to another person. I loved seeing their relationship develop and grow in a sincere way, which made for a fantastic romance.
Overall I cannot say enough amazing things about this story. It grabbed me with its premise and kept me hooked with the characters, their history, and their deep emotional bond making for an intense and tear-inducing story. I never thought a bracelet would cue the waterworks, but my goodness that passage was so beautifully stated I could not get enough of these two together.
*** I reviewed a complimentary copy of this story.***
In a fated moment, Jersey decides to reconnect with his long-lost childhood pen pal, which begins one of the most heartfelt second-chance romances I have ever read. They are both haunted by their past, but together they finally feel connected to another person. I loved seeing their relationship develop and grow in a sincere way, which made for a fantastic romance.
Overall I cannot say enough amazing things about this story. It grabbed me with its premise and kept me hooked with the characters, their history, and their deep emotional bond making for an intense and tear-inducing story. I never thought a bracelet would cue the waterworks, but my goodness that passage was so beautifully stated I could not get enough of these two together.
*** I reviewed a complimentary copy of this story.***
March 1, 2024
[3.9] oh how i love a second-chance, hurt-comfort story stemming from an estranged friendship.
i'm not usually one for flashbacks, particularly chapters alternating timelines, but i loved their inclusion here (and confession: i almost preferred the glimpses of their past to the present - I KNOW, GASP 🫣). not only are their scenes together at the camp pivotal in understanding their origins, but there's something special about seeing them be kids, when the trauma hasn't quite settled in with the kind of permanency it often takes in adulthood, going on adventures and (re)capturing the innocence and joy of their youth.
the tone of the story is melancholy to the tune of so much hurt and loss. Koa's pov is especially brutal to read: brusquely bleak and funereal. a mind that deems everything meaningless. he's comforted by a lack of feeling, untouched by the world and unbothered by not having an active part in it as a consequence.
that is, until Jersey's reappearance reignites the flicker of hope inside him.
i did find the story falling short with their first meeting and the rebuilding of their relationship. the lead up was great and the in-between correspondence to break the ice so endearingly gentle, but the act itself felt somewhat anticlimactic (which could very well have been the point to demonstrate upfront the chasm formed by years of distance, so i could look past that). then, where i would've preferred talks of friendship to take center stage longer, Jersey came across persistent enough about them giving a romantic relationship a try for me to notice. i never got the impression that he would force it on Koa, so that's a point in his favor, but (1) i found it a bit strange that he'd want to leap into dating so soon after not having given Koa much thought until he saw the letters again (devil’s advocate: i could see the lost years as something that compelled him to make a move so history wouldn’t repeat itself), and (2) for two people at a place where they don't have much else in their lives to rely on, it didn't have as strong of a sense of purposeful reciprocity that i’m an absolute sucker for. because it was more so Koa going along to prove Jersey wrong (while also grasping on to the romantic connection like an emergency float in a subconscious hope that it'd pull him out of the shadows), there was a good bit of repetition to their relationship beats that could’ve been drawn with more impact rather than the arguably sudden change of heart toward the end.
but don’t get me and my sleep-deprived opinions wrong - regardless of my niggles, i still really enjoyed the opposites attract angle, NJ's use of symbolism, their texts / letters, and dare i say one of my new favorite side characters? i'm decidedly partial to Niles, Koa’s ex and friend who is more than worthy of the Most Amazing Human Being award for his endless support. without him, these two wouldn't be. i'm begging on my knees that he gets his own HEA and that it be written with all the sparkle and applause he deserves, because what a superstar!
Thank you to the author for providing a complimentary copy of this book; this is my honest review :)
----initial reaction to reveal----
excuse me, did i hear OLD-SCHOOL NICKY ANGST?? EVERYONE, CALM DOWN. THIS IS NOT A DRILL *hyperventilates*
i'm not usually one for flashbacks, particularly chapters alternating timelines, but i loved their inclusion here (and confession: i almost preferred the glimpses of their past to the present - I KNOW, GASP 🫣). not only are their scenes together at the camp pivotal in understanding their origins, but there's something special about seeing them be kids, when the trauma hasn't quite settled in with the kind of permanency it often takes in adulthood, going on adventures and (re)capturing the innocence and joy of their youth.
the tone of the story is melancholy to the tune of so much hurt and loss. Koa's pov is especially brutal to read: brusquely bleak and funereal. a mind that deems everything meaningless. he's comforted by a lack of feeling, untouched by the world and unbothered by not having an active part in it as a consequence.
that is, until Jersey's reappearance reignites the flicker of hope inside him.
i did find the story falling short with their first meeting and the rebuilding of their relationship. the lead up was great and the in-between correspondence to break the ice so endearingly gentle, but the act itself felt somewhat anticlimactic (which could very well have been the point to demonstrate upfront the chasm formed by years of distance, so i could look past that). then, where i would've preferred talks of friendship to take center stage longer, Jersey came across persistent enough about them giving a romantic relationship a try for me to notice. i never got the impression that he would force it on Koa, so that's a point in his favor, but (1) i found it a bit strange that he'd want to leap into dating so soon after not having given Koa much thought until he saw the letters again (devil’s advocate: i could see the lost years as something that compelled him to make a move so history wouldn’t repeat itself), and (2) for two people at a place where they don't have much else in their lives to rely on, it didn't have as strong of a sense of purposeful reciprocity that i’m an absolute sucker for. because it was more so Koa going along to prove Jersey wrong (while also grasping on to the romantic connection like an emergency float in a subconscious hope that it'd pull him out of the shadows), there was a good bit of repetition to their relationship beats that could’ve been drawn with more impact rather than the arguably sudden change of heart toward the end.
but don’t get me and my sleep-deprived opinions wrong - regardless of my niggles, i still really enjoyed the opposites attract angle, NJ's use of symbolism, their texts / letters, and dare i say one of my new favorite side characters? i'm decidedly partial to Niles, Koa’s ex and friend who is more than worthy of the Most Amazing Human Being award for his endless support. without him, these two wouldn't be. i'm begging on my knees that he gets his own HEA and that it be written with all the sparkle and applause he deserves, because what a superstar!
Thank you to the author for providing a complimentary copy of this book; this is my honest review :)
----initial reaction to reveal----
excuse me, did i hear OLD-SCHOOL NICKY ANGST?? EVERYONE, CALM DOWN. THIS IS NOT A DRILL *hyperventilates*
March 2, 2024
Audio: 5 stars, Nick J Russo killed it!
Book: 3-3.5 stars
While this was addictive and I couldn’t put it down once I started, I felt like the relationship at the end of the book was rushed, and that something’s were missing to make this a higher rated book for me.
Don’t get me wrong, the writing was typical Nicky James, it was like I said above addictive, something about how she writes damaged characters makes you feel all their heartache and you want to reach out and comfort them as well. Koa and Jersey went through a lot, you see their friendship in their flashbacks to how that is now the basis of their rekindling relationship 30ish years later.
I do love how understanding Jersey was with Koa and how he didn’t push when he knew it would cause more harm. But the reveal for Koa’s trauma, while kinda predictable in what happens to him, was rushed at the end. I was hoping that it was more fleshed out or something, but maybe it’s my mood, but it didn’t feel like it was given the page time it deserved from how much it affected Koa throughout the whole book.
Also Jerseys son/ex wife just felt like an afterthought they weren’t needed to make the book better, could have done without them lol.
And lastly I wanted the epilogue to be longer or a little farther in the future.
Either way this book was good for what it was, I can see myself possibly rereading it in the future, but in reality I want to see where Nicky James goes for Nile’s book!
Book: 3-3.5 stars
While this was addictive and I couldn’t put it down once I started, I felt like the relationship at the end of the book was rushed, and that something’s were missing to make this a higher rated book for me.
Don’t get me wrong, the writing was typical Nicky James, it was like I said above addictive, something about how she writes damaged characters makes you feel all their heartache and you want to reach out and comfort them as well. Koa and Jersey went through a lot, you see their friendship in their flashbacks to how that is now the basis of their rekindling relationship 30ish years later.
I do love how understanding Jersey was with Koa and how he didn’t push when he knew it would cause more harm. But the reveal for Koa’s trauma, while kinda predictable in what happens to him, was rushed at the end. I was hoping that it was more fleshed out or something, but maybe it’s my mood, but it didn’t feel like it was given the page time it deserved from how much it affected Koa throughout the whole book.
Also Jerseys son/ex wife just felt like an afterthought they weren’t needed to make the book better, could have done without them lol.
And lastly I wanted the epilogue to be longer or a little farther in the future.
Either way this book was good for what it was, I can see myself possibly rereading it in the future, but in reality I want to see where Nicky James goes for Nile’s book!
March 8, 2024
”I did everything in my power to forget you, Jersey.”
His smile dimmed, and he washed a hand over his trimmed beard.
“I deserve that.”
There’s a deep sense of melancholy within both main characters that permeates the whole book. Highly sensitive issues are written about with great care and compassion. And as I usually am, I was so impressed and enthralled with Nicky’s story telling abilities. I’d urge fans of Nicky’s The Endless Road To Sunshine to check this one out. We have dual timelines going on. One timeline follows Koa and Jersey becoming closer friends at camp as kids while another is in the present where they have slowly started to reunite. Jersey was the only kid that showed Koa any empathy at camp. His only friend. His guiding light through the darkness. A shield against the cruelty of 11 year old bullies. An escape from a home life of hell. How does anyone move on from that?
The more we played, the more Koa laughed. The more he laughed, the happier I got.
There was an incident and they haven’t spoken in 30 years but Jersey is determined to make things right and as for Koa? He’s determined to keep on with the decades long silent treatment even if his heart craves something else. This isn’t a light read at all. It’s a hard fought second chance romance where both men are fighting their own battles.
”The world really was unkind to you, wasn’t it?”
“I won’t discuss the past, Jersey. Kindly leave it, or I’ll walk out the door.”
Koa especially spoke to me. He’s nihilistic. He’s hurting but hiding in his profession. In his books. He’s a cat lover that believes solitude is easier. People are complicated. He’s still holding a torch for Jersey while at the same time trying to blow it out whenever he gets the chance. People are complicated but Jersey is easy. Jersey has always been easy. Again, how does anyone move on from that? They’ve both experienced a lot of hardship and their pain comes off the page. I felt so deeply for Koa and Jersey. I wanted all the good things for them. All of them!
A few things I look forward to when reading a Nicky book: the sense of place, how well researched and unique each book or each character is and how clearly I can feel what the characters are feeling. Details but not in excess. Attention to the small things. This was certainly a hard read at times but so very worthwhile. I found myself constantly wanting to return to this book and thinking about these guys when I dare do something else. I especially enjoyed the intrigue. What actually happened in 1989? And what will happen next? Because Koa is so guarded and his walls so high up, a romance between them felt almost impossible at times. How will we get to point B when we haven’t even gotten to point A!!! I recommend having patience with this book and these characters. They do not reveal themselves very easily. Especially Koa. This is a slow burn. A simmer, really. Look forward to yearning & groveling. Coming of age adventures & personal journeys. Characters with strong narrative voices. Pain. Joy. Resilience. Bravery. Monologues about love that are a little like confessions. It’s always been you. It’s always been you. It’s always been you.
”Please stay.” And what could I do? In that moment, Koa wasn’t a forty-four year old, unreadable man. He was an eleven year old boy reaching out to me in the dark, begging me to stay by his side and fight the demons only he could see. I’d stayed then, and I would stay now.
This story reminds me of My Blood by Twenty One Pilots🖤
When everyone you thought you knew deserts your fight / I’ll go with you / You’re facing down a dark hall / I’ll grab my light and go with you / Surrounded and up against a wall / I’ll shred them all and go with you / No, you don’t need to run / Stay with me, my blood / Do they know I was grown with you? / If you find yourself in a lion’s den, I’ll jump right in
His smile dimmed, and he washed a hand over his trimmed beard.
“I deserve that.”
There’s a deep sense of melancholy within both main characters that permeates the whole book. Highly sensitive issues are written about with great care and compassion. And as I usually am, I was so impressed and enthralled with Nicky’s story telling abilities. I’d urge fans of Nicky’s The Endless Road To Sunshine to check this one out. We have dual timelines going on. One timeline follows Koa and Jersey becoming closer friends at camp as kids while another is in the present where they have slowly started to reunite. Jersey was the only kid that showed Koa any empathy at camp. His only friend. His guiding light through the darkness. A shield against the cruelty of 11 year old bullies. An escape from a home life of hell. How does anyone move on from that?
The more we played, the more Koa laughed. The more he laughed, the happier I got.
There was an incident and they haven’t spoken in 30 years but Jersey is determined to make things right and as for Koa? He’s determined to keep on with the decades long silent treatment even if his heart craves something else. This isn’t a light read at all. It’s a hard fought second chance romance where both men are fighting their own battles.
”The world really was unkind to you, wasn’t it?”
“I won’t discuss the past, Jersey. Kindly leave it, or I’ll walk out the door.”
Koa especially spoke to me. He’s nihilistic. He’s hurting but hiding in his profession. In his books. He’s a cat lover that believes solitude is easier. People are complicated. He’s still holding a torch for Jersey while at the same time trying to blow it out whenever he gets the chance. People are complicated but Jersey is easy. Jersey has always been easy. Again, how does anyone move on from that? They’ve both experienced a lot of hardship and their pain comes off the page. I felt so deeply for Koa and Jersey. I wanted all the good things for them. All of them!
A few things I look forward to when reading a Nicky book: the sense of place, how well researched and unique each book or each character is and how clearly I can feel what the characters are feeling. Details but not in excess. Attention to the small things. This was certainly a hard read at times but so very worthwhile. I found myself constantly wanting to return to this book and thinking about these guys when I dare do something else. I especially enjoyed the intrigue. What actually happened in 1989? And what will happen next? Because Koa is so guarded and his walls so high up, a romance between them felt almost impossible at times. How will we get to point B when we haven’t even gotten to point A!!! I recommend having patience with this book and these characters. They do not reveal themselves very easily. Especially Koa. This is a slow burn. A simmer, really. Look forward to yearning & groveling. Coming of age adventures & personal journeys. Characters with strong narrative voices. Pain. Joy. Resilience. Bravery. Monologues about love that are a little like confessions. It’s always been you. It’s always been you. It’s always been you.
”Please stay.” And what could I do? In that moment, Koa wasn’t a forty-four year old, unreadable man. He was an eleven year old boy reaching out to me in the dark, begging me to stay by his side and fight the demons only he could see. I’d stayed then, and I would stay now.
This story reminds me of My Blood by Twenty One Pilots🖤
When everyone you thought you knew deserts your fight / I’ll go with you / You’re facing down a dark hall / I’ll grab my light and go with you / Surrounded and up against a wall / I’ll shred them all and go with you / No, you don’t need to run / Stay with me, my blood / Do they know I was grown with you? / If you find yourself in a lion’s den, I’ll jump right in
March 8, 2024
I’m very conflicted about this book. I have to take some time to think about how to rate.
So, here goes...
When Nicky James announced she was writing a new book, an old-fashioned style Nicky James high angst story, I was thrilled, because I love her for writing those books that devastate me, that make me feel so much. The ones that make me cry and feel the pain of the main characters, those are the ones that stick with me.
The book that immediately came to mind was The Devil Inside, my absolute favorite by her, with two of my most cherished broken characters. And with that book in mind, I started reading this one.
And that's what might be my main mistake. Because of that, I probably didn't go into this one open minded. My expectations might have been unreasonably high, which is quite unfair to the author.
But having said that, Nicky James is one of my very favorite authors in the MM genre and so, for the life of me, I couldn't go into one of her books without these high expectations.
This book sounded so right up my alley. A broken character, another character who dealt with his own problems. Two men who were childhood friends and who needed to heal together. Is it any wonder that after reading the blurb, I had to think of The devil inside?
When I started reading, I had a hard time connecting to Koa. Maybe that's what the author meant to happen, with how closed off he was to the world around him, to the people around him, the high walls he erected due to his past trauma. But it bothered me. I couldn't get him. And I think that's because we only learn about the facts and details about his trauma late in the book. Maybe if I had known earlier what exactly had happened to him, I would have felt more for him. I would have understood him better.
As for Jersey, he was quite a distant character for me as well, but it's harder to point out exactly why I couldn't connect with him either. I had a hard time feeling their connection, even when they were still young kids at the camp where they first met. Maybe the years for them to reconnect were too long in between to make it believable to me? Sometimes it's frustrating when you're unable to point out exactly why a book didn't work, but seeing as so many other readers were devastated by this book, it's safe to say that it's all me and not the book.
So yes, I was disappointed, but, as I pointed out, most if it had to do with me comparing this book to The devil inside. My brain just didn't let go of that while reading this book. I continued to compare, realizing as I went, that nor Koa, nor Jersey had any resemblance to Oakland or Jameson, they couldn't come near how deeply these 2 affected me and broke my heart. (As if to find some proof, I'm re-reading that book, and it still hurts as hell, so it still stands as one of the most heartbreaking books I ever read.)
My ratings are always mirroring the way a book touched me. How deeply my feelings and emotions were involved. How deeply these characters got under my skin. I wouldn't know how to rate differently. So when I rate this book 3 stars, it doesn't exactly mean it's a bad book, it just shows it didn't touch me the way I hoped it would. So, if you consider reading this book because the blurb speaks to you, by all means, don't let my review keep you from doing so. Read other reviews as well, because it's clear that it's all me and not this book. But it pains me to rate a Nicky James book with only 3 stars, I don't think that has ever happened before. And it hurts even more because this book sounded so promising, so much like the kind of books I search for and long to read. And then it just wasn't...
I kindly received an advanced copy from the author and this is my honest, unbiased opinion.
So, here goes...
When Nicky James announced she was writing a new book, an old-fashioned style Nicky James high angst story, I was thrilled, because I love her for writing those books that devastate me, that make me feel so much. The ones that make me cry and feel the pain of the main characters, those are the ones that stick with me.
The book that immediately came to mind was The Devil Inside, my absolute favorite by her, with two of my most cherished broken characters. And with that book in mind, I started reading this one.
And that's what might be my main mistake. Because of that, I probably didn't go into this one open minded. My expectations might have been unreasonably high, which is quite unfair to the author.
But having said that, Nicky James is one of my very favorite authors in the MM genre and so, for the life of me, I couldn't go into one of her books without these high expectations.
This book sounded so right up my alley. A broken character, another character who dealt with his own problems. Two men who were childhood friends and who needed to heal together. Is it any wonder that after reading the blurb, I had to think of The devil inside?
When I started reading, I had a hard time connecting to Koa. Maybe that's what the author meant to happen, with how closed off he was to the world around him, to the people around him, the high walls he erected due to his past trauma. But it bothered me. I couldn't get him. And I think that's because we only learn about the facts and details about his trauma late in the book. Maybe if I had known earlier what exactly had happened to him, I would have felt more for him. I would have understood him better.
As for Jersey, he was quite a distant character for me as well, but it's harder to point out exactly why I couldn't connect with him either. I had a hard time feeling their connection, even when they were still young kids at the camp where they first met. Maybe the years for them to reconnect were too long in between to make it believable to me? Sometimes it's frustrating when you're unable to point out exactly why a book didn't work, but seeing as so many other readers were devastated by this book, it's safe to say that it's all me and not the book.
So yes, I was disappointed, but, as I pointed out, most if it had to do with me comparing this book to The devil inside. My brain just didn't let go of that while reading this book. I continued to compare, realizing as I went, that nor Koa, nor Jersey had any resemblance to Oakland or Jameson, they couldn't come near how deeply these 2 affected me and broke my heart. (As if to find some proof, I'm re-reading that book, and it still hurts as hell, so it still stands as one of the most heartbreaking books I ever read.)
My ratings are always mirroring the way a book touched me. How deeply my feelings and emotions were involved. How deeply these characters got under my skin. I wouldn't know how to rate differently. So when I rate this book 3 stars, it doesn't exactly mean it's a bad book, it just shows it didn't touch me the way I hoped it would. So, if you consider reading this book because the blurb speaks to you, by all means, don't let my review keep you from doing so. Read other reviews as well, because it's clear that it's all me and not this book. But it pains me to rate a Nicky James book with only 3 stars, I don't think that has ever happened before. And it hurts even more because this book sounded so promising, so much like the kind of books I search for and long to read. And then it just wasn't...
I kindly received an advanced copy from the author and this is my honest, unbiased opinion.
December 14, 2024
3,5* rounded up
God how I wish this book was a five-star. Because for the first half, it looked like a new favorite, I'm not even kidding. The story is great, incredibly well-written in dual POV (which I normally don't enjoy but damn I did) and two different timelines, sucked me in right from the start and I was immediately invested.
And the characters, oh. Mainly Koa, he stole my heart and I don't think I'm getting it back. He went through something terribly traumatic as a child (for almost the whole book we don't even know what, you just know you maybe don't even want to know) and it formed his entire personality, as it's a given. Despite that, he was so relatable and I saw so much of myself in him. Then there's Jersey, a retired hockey player (due to an injury) who fucked up a lot in life and is kind of drifting... until he meets Koa again. After thirty years. Both characters are complex and even when I didn't agree with some of their actions, I understood the motivations.
Big kudos to Niles, Koa's ex and best friend. I worried he would be written in a typical way so we would hate him BUT it's not the case! He was amazing and I loved him which is a nice change, I'm tired of evil ex-partners who are there only to stir up trouble and drama.
So. In the first half of the book, I fell in love. In the third quarter, at times I struggled with understanding Koa's and Jersey's developing relationship, but I'm ready to believe that was intentional - and quite fitting. These two knew each other as kids for four years, then they parted (not amiably) and reconnected after THIRTY YEARS (under not ideal circumstances). Not a recipe for an easy relationship. And I admit I'm still hard-pressed to connect emotionally to them as a couple.
What I can't bring myself to like was the ending.
The book will certainly stay in my mind for a while and I just wish the ending wasn't so rushed. The story deserved better. Koa deserved better. But I still liked it overall and I definitely recommend it. AND Niles is getting his own book, yay!!!
God how I wish this book was a five-star. Because for the first half, it looked like a new favorite, I'm not even kidding. The story is great, incredibly well-written in dual POV (which I normally don't enjoy but damn I did) and two different timelines, sucked me in right from the start and I was immediately invested.
And the characters, oh. Mainly Koa, he stole my heart and I don't think I'm getting it back. He went through something terribly traumatic as a child (for almost the whole book we don't even know what, you just know you maybe don't even want to know) and it formed his entire personality, as it's a given. Despite that, he was so relatable and I saw so much of myself in him. Then there's Jersey, a retired hockey player (due to an injury) who fucked up a lot in life and is kind of drifting... until he meets Koa again. After thirty years. Both characters are complex and even when I didn't agree with some of their actions, I understood the motivations.
Big kudos to Niles, Koa's ex and best friend. I worried he would be written in a typical way so we would hate him BUT it's not the case! He was amazing and I loved him which is a nice change, I'm tired of evil ex-partners who are there only to stir up trouble and drama.
So. In the first half of the book, I fell in love. In the third quarter, at times I struggled with understanding Koa's and Jersey's developing relationship, but I'm ready to believe that was intentional - and quite fitting. These two knew each other as kids for four years, then they parted (not amiably) and reconnected after THIRTY YEARS (under not ideal circumstances). Not a recipe for an easy relationship. And I admit I'm still hard-pressed to connect emotionally to them as a couple.
What I can't bring myself to like was the ending.
The book will certainly stay in my mind for a while and I just wish the ending wasn't so rushed. The story deserved better. Koa deserved better. But I still liked it overall and I definitely recommend it. AND Niles is getting his own book, yay!!!
March 8, 2024
“The mystery of human existence lies not in just staying alive, but in finding something to live for.“
This quote by Dostoyevsky pretty much sums what this book is about: it’s the story of Koa, who lived through a truly traumatic incident when he’s been 8 years old, only to be raised by his very much unlikable grandfather afterwards. During summer camp, he meets Jersey, who’s his complete opposite, only to lose him, too, at the age of 14, despite the fact that they promised each other to be there for each other.
30 years again, they meet again. Both older, both having lived through their share of life, only that now, Jersey is reaching out, wanting to apologise to Koa for the way he behaved all this time ago.
And they reconnect, become a couple, despite the fact that Koa still feels like he’s unable to love - his trauma still there, but hidden better than as a child/teen.
There are a lot of TW: death of a parent/close relative, bullying, (internalised) homophobia and many more. Nevertheless, the book is mostly positive, beautiful, tender and loving.
What I’m never a huge fan of: time jumps. The book switches from episodes that took place in the summer camp to present day, and while I understand why the author chose to interweave both time strands, I would have loved it more if we had a “before” and an “present day” part.
On the other hand - what made me stick to it despite the occasional flaws was the narration by Nick J. Russo, who gave so much life to all the characters that they became alive, and I couldn’t put it down before their HEA.
And another thing I loved: there's no sugarcoating when it comes to Koa's mental health issues. There's no magic potion that makes everything dissapear, but there's a lot of love and understanding on both sides, combined with the will to make the relationship work.
3.5 rounded up because of the NJR bonus ❤️
This quote by Dostoyevsky pretty much sums what this book is about: it’s the story of Koa, who lived through a truly traumatic incident when he’s been 8 years old, only to be raised by his very much unlikable grandfather afterwards. During summer camp, he meets Jersey, who’s his complete opposite, only to lose him, too, at the age of 14, despite the fact that they promised each other to be there for each other.
30 years again, they meet again. Both older, both having lived through their share of life, only that now, Jersey is reaching out, wanting to apologise to Koa for the way he behaved all this time ago.
And they reconnect, become a couple, despite the fact that Koa still feels like he’s unable to love - his trauma still there, but hidden better than as a child/teen.
There are a lot of TW: death of a parent/close relative, bullying, (internalised) homophobia and many more. Nevertheless, the book is mostly positive, beautiful, tender and loving.
What I’m never a huge fan of: time jumps. The book switches from episodes that took place in the summer camp to present day, and while I understand why the author chose to interweave both time strands, I would have loved it more if we had a “before” and an “present day” part.
On the other hand - what made me stick to it despite the occasional flaws was the narration by Nick J. Russo, who gave so much life to all the characters that they became alive, and I couldn’t put it down before their HEA.
And another thing I loved: there's no sugarcoating when it comes to Koa's mental health issues. There's no magic potion that makes everything dissapear, but there's a lot of love and understanding on both sides, combined with the will to make the relationship work.
3.5 rounded up because of the NJR bonus ❤️
March 5, 2024
For those who have been waiting for one of Nicky James' trademark angst-filled romance with grief and mental health representation, wait no more. Promises of Forever is a slow-burn, friends to estranged to lovers second-chance romance.
The story is dual POV with flashbacks to the MCs' childhood at the camp where they met and became friends. In the present, they're both in their 40s. Koa's a professor, and his best - and only - friend is his ex. Jersey's NHL career ended a decade ago with an injury that led to addiction, which in turn ended his marriage and cost him his son as well. The sudden death of both his parents takes him back to his childhood home to deal with their estate. All these events have given both MCs have enough baggage to support a theater troupe.
Koa, though, has real trauma he's repressed for over 30 years. Jersey knows and respects that, though it's not easy watching someone you love struggle.
Typically I'm not a fan of flashbacks used throughout a book, but in Promises of Forever, the past and present are interwoven, so it works better here to me than having a large portion of the beginning set in the past. Much of what and who the MCs are now lies in those early years, and alternating between past and present rachets up the tension in both time periods with each successive chapter, like a rubber band being pulled taut. I kept waiting for it to either snap or break; the angst builds as much as in any of Nicky's mystery-suspense books. Just waiting for *that* moment, the breaking point.
Then *it* happens, and it's exactly as impactful as I expected. The denouement helps bring emotions back into a semblance of control, and in the end, my heart hurt as much for Jersey as for Koa. To say their HEA is hard-won is an understatement.
The story is dual POV with flashbacks to the MCs' childhood at the camp where they met and became friends. In the present, they're both in their 40s. Koa's a professor, and his best - and only - friend is his ex. Jersey's NHL career ended a decade ago with an injury that led to addiction, which in turn ended his marriage and cost him his son as well. The sudden death of both his parents takes him back to his childhood home to deal with their estate. All these events have given both MCs have enough baggage to support a theater troupe.
Koa, though, has real trauma he's repressed for over 30 years. Jersey knows and respects that, though it's not easy watching someone you love struggle.
Typically I'm not a fan of flashbacks used throughout a book, but in Promises of Forever, the past and present are interwoven, so it works better here to me than having a large portion of the beginning set in the past. Much of what and who the MCs are now lies in those early years, and alternating between past and present rachets up the tension in both time periods with each successive chapter, like a rubber band being pulled taut. I kept waiting for it to either snap or break; the angst builds as much as in any of Nicky's mystery-suspense books. Just waiting for *that* moment, the breaking point.
Then *it* happens, and it's exactly as impactful as I expected. The denouement helps bring emotions back into a semblance of control, and in the end, my heart hurt as much for Jersey as for Koa. To say their HEA is hard-won is an understatement.
March 7, 2024
❝ I wish I could live at camp forever. I don't even care if people make fun of me. I would live there even if it snowed. I'd sleep in our tree like a hibernating bear. I like it at camp because you're there, and you make me feel safe. You help me stop the nightmares when they come. ❞
I don’t know. I’m simply confused because I didn’t loved it but I was so invested. I was so attached to the characters, their past campy days and their present ones. The constant push and pull between Koa and Jersey was maddening but I just couldn’t look away. This book overall was exhausting to me but I just can’t give it anything lower than this rating. I was hooked. The epilogue made everything worth it. Will always be a Nicky James defender.
June 14, 2024
5 stars to an exceptional book! The lyrical writing moved me to tears. But this was not an enjoyable book.. it was melancholy and depressing. So why the 5 stars? Well because of the immersive experience.. an experience that was heavy with regrets, poignant with nostalgia, hurt by people and yet cautiously optimistic about the future. 🫶 It’s hard to summarize this book so I won’t; trope-wise one can say it is a grown up romance with both MCs in their forties given a second chance to rekindle a 30 year old friendship/affection into something more. Their main obstacles are their past mistakes and inner demons.. and it will take more than love to conquer them.
“Like shadows, my sorrows lie at my feet. Chained and bound. An infinite defeat. Stretching long, bleeding pools of sadness. I weep, unable to get free. For if thy heart knew such pain, you shan’t share my woes. You’d fight. You’d tell me, son, remember, shadows cannot exist without light.”
This book is not easy.. but its beauty is in the storytelling. I loved it, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to re-read it. However I will recommend it to all M/M romance readers who are looking for something more than just steam and romance. ❤️
“Like shadows, my sorrows lie at my feet. Chained and bound. An infinite defeat. Stretching long, bleeding pools of sadness. I weep, unable to get free. For if thy heart knew such pain, you shan’t share my woes. You’d fight. You’d tell me, son, remember, shadows cannot exist without light.”
This book is not easy.. but its beauty is in the storytelling. I loved it, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to re-read it. However I will recommend it to all M/M romance readers who are looking for something more than just steam and romance. ❤️
September 7, 2024
Audio - 4 Stars
Story - 2.5 Stars
Story - 2.5 Stars
March 5, 2024
3.5⭐️ I had a very difficult time with this book and I’m still on the fence as to whether I like it or not.
I found it quite beautiful in its own way, Nicky James is obviously very smart and a good writer, and I certainly appreciated parts of it. But it’s so tragically morose and depressing that I can’t really say I enjoyed myself. It felt like trudging through the swamp of sadness with the characters’ constant thoughts and discussions of the meaninglessness of life, paired with Koa’s intense apathy and mental illness.
I honestly had such a hard time connecting with Koa, but I think that was part of the point of the story. He’s so closed off and emotionally shut down due to his childhood trauma, and yet Jersey and his best friend, Niles, both loved him unconditionally—and there is beauty in that, in being worthy of love when you have absolutely nothing to give and are unable to reciprocate that love.
The romance was so very slow and there was just so much philosophical talk, which made sense since Koa was a philosophy professor, but it felt tedious at times. What kept me reading was the hope that Koa could turn things around and come to love Jersey in his own way, and also wanting to find out what actually happened to him in his past to cause so much debilitating trauma. Unfortunately, I didn’t quite feel satisfied with amount of romance we were given in exchange for all the hardship and sadness we had to slog through. Things didn’t really come together until 95% and I was left wanting more of them together and happy.
I will say, I did love Niles. He wins the award for the most supportive and selfless best friend, and I will definitely read his book.
I found it quite beautiful in its own way, Nicky James is obviously very smart and a good writer, and I certainly appreciated parts of it. But it’s so tragically morose and depressing that I can’t really say I enjoyed myself. It felt like trudging through the swamp of sadness with the characters’ constant thoughts and discussions of the meaninglessness of life, paired with Koa’s intense apathy and mental illness.
I honestly had such a hard time connecting with Koa, but I think that was part of the point of the story. He’s so closed off and emotionally shut down due to his childhood trauma, and yet Jersey and his best friend, Niles, both loved him unconditionally—and there is beauty in that, in being worthy of love when you have absolutely nothing to give and are unable to reciprocate that love.
The romance was so very slow and there was just so much philosophical talk, which made sense since Koa was a philosophy professor, but it felt tedious at times. What kept me reading was the hope that Koa could turn things around and come to love Jersey in his own way, and also wanting to find out what actually happened to him in his past to cause so much debilitating trauma. Unfortunately, I didn’t quite feel satisfied with amount of romance we were given in exchange for all the hardship and sadness we had to slog through. Things didn’t really come together until 95% and I was left wanting more of them together and happy.
I will say, I did love Niles. He wins the award for the most supportive and selfless best friend, and I will definitely read his book.
January 10, 2025
Book safety, content warnings, and tropes down below.
He smiled, and I was a child again, yearning for the attention of a boy who couldn’t give me what I needed.
This book had me all kinds of fucked up (still does, clearly), and even a few days later I’m still not sure how to rate it or what to say.
A lot of the basis for the current day plot and relationship is built on the fact that Jersey has made huge life improvements and changed, yet, because of this (plot spoilers), it didn’t feel that way:
Anyway. If you read that entire spoiler paragraph you might wonder how I could enjoy it at all, and there’s my problem. It was written beautifully, the concept was amazing, and Koa was a troubled yet amazing character. I adored all the chapters from the past at summer camp, and found myself wishing this was Koa’s story where he overcomes trauma and heals, and finds happiness on his own and with friends. Jersey didn’t feel completely right for him (for the most part, more on that later). Koa’s philosophical beliefs can be summed up with ‘life or death doesn’t matter and there’s no point in finding happiness’, and there really didn’t seem to be a future for this couple until the very end, which in some ways made sense but also felt unsatisfactory.
“I’m neither complicated nor straightforward. I am simply one insignificant being on a planet of many. I don’t ask anyone to understand me.” “And you don’t allow yourself to be understood.”
Now. Jersey. There’s opposites attract, and then there’s opposites god only knows why attracts. His reasons for contacting Koa after so many years felt selfish. In the long run it did help Koa in many ways, and he redeemed himself in many ways because of his (eventual) selfless love for Koa. He was willing to stay in any way Koa needed, forever, but his change from the start of the book to the end didn’t make sense to me. I don’t like it when the love interest is the catalyst for massive changes. His own child wasn’t enough to change things, but meeting a childhood friend he hadn’t even thought about in 30 years was? Nah bro.
I’m sooo fkn conflicted. I cried through the whole thing. I loved it. I hated it. I loved Koa. I hated him when he refused to actually participate in therapy. ‘But how can you hate someone for struggling after that kind of trauma??’ I DON’T KNOW, OKAY? And speaking of unspeakable trauma, it would’ve been nice to find out wtf it even was a smidge earlier.
Loved: that it wasn’t super sexually explicit. I mean, there was spice, but it was toned down and not erotic. Fit the book very well.
The ending felt like a mild HFN at best, considering I spent 90% of the book wondering why they would even want to be together or how it could possibly work long term.
Yeah, writing this review didn’t help at all lol. I still don’t know how I feel.
And Jersey is a stupid name for a (former) pro hockey player.
I wish I could live at camp forever. I don’t even care if people make fun of me. I would live there even if it snowed. I’d sleep in our tree like a hibernating bear. I like it at camp because you’re there, and you make me feel safe. You help me stop the nightmares when they come.
⬇️ Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & content tags ⚠️
Second chance ish
Past trauma
Childhood pen pals
Cat dad
Professor MC
Mental illness rep
Size difference
Former pro athlete
Slow burn
⚠️ Content warning ⚠️
Mentions of MC being a drug addict (past)
Death of parents (off page, prior to start of book)
Brief and vague mention of MC cheating on ex wife (past)
Alcohol consumption
MC no contact with child
Past teasing/bullying of MC (by other kids and MC)
Mention of past use of ableist slur against MC
On-page dissociation (past and present)
Grandparent with cancer
MC victim of physical child abuse (past)
Use of a homophobic slur
PTSD
Mentions of prescription drug use
Explicit sexual content
Death of grandparent
On-page self harm during mental health crisis (hitting things)
On-page intoxication
Mixing alcohol and Xanax
MC’s parents murdered by sibling (past, gunshots)
MC accidentally killing sibling in self defense (past)
Religious trauma
⚠️Book safety ⚠️
Cheating: No
Other person drama: No (Koa is close friends with his ex, but they’re only friends)
Breakup: No
POV: 1st person, dual
Genre: Contemporary romance
Pairing: M/M
Strict roles or versatile: Strict roles
Main characters’ age: 44 and 44
Series: Interconnected standalone
Kindle Unlimited: Yes
Pages: 360
Happy ending: Yes (HFN)
I’d studied endless philosophies, trying to discover the meaning of life because there had to be answers out there for why I’d been made to suffer.
People tended to move on a different plane of existence than me. I was a shadow, a grain of sand on a beach, a raindrop in a thunderstorm. The ability to flow fluidly, to combine our two worlds, seemed impossible. I would always remain too far out of reach. People grew frustrated and left. And I was so tired of hurting. I couldn’t risk bringing more pain into my life.
You can find most of my reviews on Instagram as well: https://www.instagram.com/booksafety?...
He smiled, and I was a child again, yearning for the attention of a boy who couldn’t give me what I needed.
This book had me all kinds of fucked up (still does, clearly), and even a few days later I’m still not sure how to rate it or what to say.
A lot of the basis for the current day plot and relationship is built on the fact that Jersey has made huge life improvements and changed, yet, because of this (plot spoilers), it didn’t feel that way:
Anyway. If you read that entire spoiler paragraph you might wonder how I could enjoy it at all, and there’s my problem. It was written beautifully, the concept was amazing, and Koa was a troubled yet amazing character. I adored all the chapters from the past at summer camp, and found myself wishing this was Koa’s story where he overcomes trauma and heals, and finds happiness on his own and with friends. Jersey didn’t feel completely right for him (for the most part, more on that later). Koa’s philosophical beliefs can be summed up with ‘life or death doesn’t matter and there’s no point in finding happiness’, and there really didn’t seem to be a future for this couple until the very end, which in some ways made sense but also felt unsatisfactory.
“I’m neither complicated nor straightforward. I am simply one insignificant being on a planet of many. I don’t ask anyone to understand me.” “And you don’t allow yourself to be understood.”
Now. Jersey. There’s opposites attract, and then there’s opposites god only knows why attracts. His reasons for contacting Koa after so many years felt selfish. In the long run it did help Koa in many ways, and he redeemed himself in many ways because of his (eventual) selfless love for Koa. He was willing to stay in any way Koa needed, forever, but his change from the start of the book to the end didn’t make sense to me. I don’t like it when the love interest is the catalyst for massive changes. His own child wasn’t enough to change things, but meeting a childhood friend he hadn’t even thought about in 30 years was? Nah bro.
I’m sooo fkn conflicted. I cried through the whole thing. I loved it. I hated it. I loved Koa. I hated him when he refused to actually participate in therapy. ‘But how can you hate someone for struggling after that kind of trauma??’ I DON’T KNOW, OKAY? And speaking of unspeakable trauma, it would’ve been nice to find out wtf it even was a smidge earlier.
Loved: that it wasn’t super sexually explicit. I mean, there was spice, but it was toned down and not erotic. Fit the book very well.
The ending felt like a mild HFN at best, considering I spent 90% of the book wondering why they would even want to be together or how it could possibly work long term.
Yeah, writing this review didn’t help at all lol. I still don’t know how I feel.
And Jersey is a stupid name for a (former) pro hockey player.
I wish I could live at camp forever. I don’t even care if people make fun of me. I would live there even if it snowed. I’d sleep in our tree like a hibernating bear. I like it at camp because you’re there, and you make me feel safe. You help me stop the nightmares when they come.
⬇️ Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & content tags ⚠️
Second chance ish
Past trauma
Childhood pen pals
Cat dad
Professor MC
Mental illness rep
Size difference
Former pro athlete
Slow burn
⚠️ Content warning ⚠️
Mentions of MC being a drug addict (past)
Death of parents (off page, prior to start of book)
Brief and vague mention of MC cheating on ex wife (past)
Alcohol consumption
MC no contact with child
Past teasing/bullying of MC (by other kids and MC)
Mention of past use of ableist slur against MC
On-page dissociation (past and present)
Grandparent with cancer
MC victim of physical child abuse (past)
Use of a homophobic slur
PTSD
Mentions of prescription drug use
Explicit sexual content
Death of grandparent
On-page self harm during mental health crisis (hitting things)
On-page intoxication
Mixing alcohol and Xanax
MC’s parents murdered by sibling (past, gunshots)
MC accidentally killing sibling in self defense (past)
Religious trauma
⚠️Book safety ⚠️
Cheating: No
Other person drama: No (Koa is close friends with his ex, but they’re only friends)
Breakup: No
POV: 1st person, dual
Genre: Contemporary romance
Pairing: M/M
Strict roles or versatile: Strict roles
Main characters’ age: 44 and 44
Series: Interconnected standalone
Kindle Unlimited: Yes
Pages: 360
Happy ending: Yes (HFN)
I’d studied endless philosophies, trying to discover the meaning of life because there had to be answers out there for why I’d been made to suffer.
People tended to move on a different plane of existence than me. I was a shadow, a grain of sand on a beach, a raindrop in a thunderstorm. The ability to flow fluidly, to combine our two worlds, seemed impossible. I would always remain too far out of reach. People grew frustrated and left. And I was so tired of hurting. I couldn’t risk bringing more pain into my life.
You can find most of my reviews on Instagram as well: https://www.instagram.com/booksafety?...
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 1, 2024
I think this is one of my favorite books by Nicky James. She seriously outdid herself with this one - I loved every single moment, and I honestly just didn’t want it to end. This is one HELL of a second chance romance.
I’m still a little bit of an emotional wreck and I wouldn’t change a thing.
This book had me in a chokehold from the start and never let go. These two were so perfectly imperfect I can’t stop thinking about them. And while you get little hints along the way to give you a piece of the picture of what happened to make Koa the man he is today, knowing just hits like a freight train. Especially the things you could never have guessed.
The audio, of course, was amazing by @nickj.russo - this author & narrator duo is an auto play for me.
-second chance
-extreme trauma
-mature men
-opposites attract
-hurt/comfort
I’m still a little bit of an emotional wreck and I wouldn’t change a thing.
This book had me in a chokehold from the start and never let go. These two were so perfectly imperfect I can’t stop thinking about them. And while you get little hints along the way to give you a piece of the picture of what happened to make Koa the man he is today, knowing just hits like a freight train. Especially the things you could never have guessed.
The audio, of course, was amazing by @nickj.russo - this author & narrator duo is an auto play for me.
-second chance
-extreme trauma
-mature men
-opposites attract
-hurt/comfort
February 19, 2024
Heart wrenching…. It’s been awhile since I read a book this angsty , Nicky James is up to her old tricks again ripping our hearts out and stomping on them… ;) Koa… My heart and all my hugs go to him, the tragedy and heartbreak he went through, also not being able to feel and be emotionless , I’m still crying here! I cried so much for him. Jersey… Sweetheart that went through some hard stuff and brought him back in Koa’s life and never gave up on him, thank goodness, they were meant for each other and helped each other, so glad Koa can feel now and be as happy as he can with Jersey back in his life and now as his boyfriend. So happy Jersey got his son back in his life, after reading what Koa went through it changed his perspective on life and he fought for him back. Loved the book even through the ugly crying and hoping Niles will get a book of his own, he needs his happy and is a very good friend to Koa. Definitely A Must Recommended Read! 5 Heart Shattering Stars
April 5, 2024
I've given this an A at AAR.
Taking a short break from the world of romantic suspense, Nicky James returns to the arena of contemporary romance for her latest novel, Promises of Forever. If you, like me, yearn for angsty romances you can really get your teeth into, then you need look no further because this story delivers on both counts; it’s a heartbreaking and intensely emotional slow-burn romance between two childhood friends who reconnect thirty years after they last saw one another, and it’s a compelling read that prompted sighs, smiles and more than one or two tears.
Former pro-hockey player Jersey Reid returns home for the first time in fifteen years after his parents are killed in a car accident. Full of grief and guilt at his long absence – for a multidue of what he now realises were stupid reasons - he reluctantly begins the task of sorting through their possessions, and is surprised when he comes across a box of the letters he exchanged with his pen pal, Koa, thirty years before.
Jersey and Koa met at summer camp when they were ten-years-old. It’s clear from the start that Koa is… different from the other boys – he’s quiet and reserved, spends most of his time with his imaginary friend and often has what Jersey comes to call “blank fits” where he just withdraws from the world around him and stares off into space. Even though Jersey would kind of like to be his friend, he’s worried that hanging out with the weird kid will cause his friends to turn on him, so while he doesn’t join in with their bullying and taunts, he doesn’t do anything to stop them, either. But something about the other boy draws him in, and when his friends aren’t around, Jersey secretly seeks Koa out and friendship blossoms. At Koa’s suggestion, they become pen pals, and write to each other faithfully throughout the winters until summer comes around and they go to camp – although their friendship remains a secret from everyone else. Over the years, they develop an incredibly strong bond – until the day an unthinking action drives them apart.
Re-reading those letters, so full of childhood innocence and hope and affection, tugs at Jersey’s heart and kind of wakes him up, bringing in its wake a kind of clarity he hasn’t experienced for the past fifteen years. After his hockey career ended – due to injury – he became addicted to painkillers and, bitter and miserable at the unfairness of it all, pushed everyone away. His marriage broke down and his wife left, taking their two-year-old son with her – and when his parents tried to encourage him to seek help, he cut them out of his life as well. He hasn’t seen Koa – or even thought about him - in three decades but the letters touch him deeply, reminding him of a simpler time and of a friendship he wishes he’d held onto. He looks Koa up online and discovers that he now teaches classic literature and philosophy at an elite boarding school, which, remembering that Koa had once said he wanted to be a teacher, makes him smile. Even though he knows it might not be the best idea to intrude upon the life of a man he hasn’t seen in thirty years, and fully prepared for rejection, Jersey decides to write to Koa and suggest that maybe they could get together for a drink or coffee to “take a walk down memory lane” – because Jersey needs to apologise for the mistake he made that caused the abrupt end to their friendship, and, perhaps to try to regain something he’s lost.
Dr. Koa Bugard has forged a very carefully constructed and tightly controlled life for himself in the years since he and Jersey parted, a life built on a deeply-ingrained cynicism and nihilistic outlook that has no place for emotion or even happiness – because the only way he can live with his past is to lock away all feeling. He lives for his job, looks after his cat, and is content with his solitary existence - although he tried a relationship once, with Niles, the music teacher at the school, but it didn’t work out. Niles wanted to more from Koa than he was prepared or able to give, wanted them to make an emotional connection, and broke things off when he realised that was never going to happen. They’re still friends, though – Niles is a good guy and is determined not to let Koa opt out of social interaction completely, and it’s he who encourages him not to dismiss Jersey’s overture of friendship out of hand.
Their initial meeting is certainly awkward. Koa’s preference is to live in the present and not look back, but he decides to meet with Jersey – once – to hear what he has to say, and then that will be it. But even two weeks afterwards, Koa can’t put Jersey back into the box in his mind and forget about him, which is very frustrating. Niles encourages him to invite Jersey out to dinner – talking about Jersey’s letter and their meeting is the first time Niles has seen Koa have a strong reaction to anything so there’s clearly something there – and from then, Jersey and Koa begin seeing each other regularly. Koa tries to warn Jersey that he’ll eventually become frustrated by his perpetual indifference and what Niles calls his icy heart, but Jersey is determined not to ask more of Koa than he’s prepared to give.
Adult Jersey recognises what his teenaged self could not – that Koa must have suffered some kind of serious trauma in childhood that led to what Jersey, back then, just saw as weird behaviour. Now, though, he can see that whatever happened continues to haunt Koa and is the basis for his insistent belief that life is essentially meaningless and his inability – or unwillingness – to allow himself to feel. Jersey respects Koa’s decision to keep it to himself and makes it clear he doesn’t want to know anything Koa doesn’t want him to; he’s prepared to never know what happened if Koa doesn’t want to tell him, but he also knows that keeping it all so tightly locked away can’t be good for him. The longer their new relationship goes on, the more he begins to worry for the man he’s come to love. It’s not just that Koa can’t or won’t connect with him emotionally, it’s that his whole outlook on life is so profoundly unhealthy – and when events cause Koa’s carefully constructed walls to shatter so completely that he starts to shut down, Jersey fears he may go away and never come back.
I’m always in the market for a romance between people in mid-life, people who have been around the block a few times and for whom life hasn’t always been a bed of roses. This is so very true for Jersey and Koa; they’ve had to work incredibly hard to keep themselves on track, even if, in Koa’s case, that work hasn’t always been in his own best interest. But the love story that unfolds here is just beautiful – the author shows us the beginnings of Jersey and Koa in a series of flashbacks placed throughout the book, and then skilfully charts the development of a deep emotional bond between them in the present day. My heart broke over and over for Koa – knowing that something absolutely terrible must have happened to affect him so profoundly (although not what it was until very near the end) – and for Jersey, too, an essentially decent man who made some poor choices, who has worked hard to get his life back on track and who absolutely deserves all the love and affection in the world. I liked his gentle persistence with Koa - he’s so patient and supportive – and watching them opening up to each other and sharing things they’ve never shared with anybody was incredibly moving and statisfying.
Jersey and Koa are well-rounded, complex characters, very different in so many ways (a middle-aged jock and nerd pairing!) but who are nonetheless perfect for each other. There are only a handful of secondary characters in the story, the most vibrant of whom is Niles, who is generous and funny and kind, very protective of Koa and has his best interests at heart. He’s quickly become a reader favourite and the author has confirmed he’ll be getting a book of his own at some point. Nicky James tackles some difficult issues in the story (see her website for a full list of warnings), and her research into the effect of trauma on mental health has clearly been extensive (anyone who has read her Trials of Fear series will already know that she always takes care to be both realistic and respectful when writing about mental health issues.)
I was captivated by Jersey and Koa’s love story and their eventual, hard-won HEA brought all the feels. Promises of Forever is one of my favourite reads of 2024 so far.
This review originally appeared at All About Romance .
Taking a short break from the world of romantic suspense, Nicky James returns to the arena of contemporary romance for her latest novel, Promises of Forever. If you, like me, yearn for angsty romances you can really get your teeth into, then you need look no further because this story delivers on both counts; it’s a heartbreaking and intensely emotional slow-burn romance between two childhood friends who reconnect thirty years after they last saw one another, and it’s a compelling read that prompted sighs, smiles and more than one or two tears.
Former pro-hockey player Jersey Reid returns home for the first time in fifteen years after his parents are killed in a car accident. Full of grief and guilt at his long absence – for a multidue of what he now realises were stupid reasons - he reluctantly begins the task of sorting through their possessions, and is surprised when he comes across a box of the letters he exchanged with his pen pal, Koa, thirty years before.
Jersey and Koa met at summer camp when they were ten-years-old. It’s clear from the start that Koa is… different from the other boys – he’s quiet and reserved, spends most of his time with his imaginary friend and often has what Jersey comes to call “blank fits” where he just withdraws from the world around him and stares off into space. Even though Jersey would kind of like to be his friend, he’s worried that hanging out with the weird kid will cause his friends to turn on him, so while he doesn’t join in with their bullying and taunts, he doesn’t do anything to stop them, either. But something about the other boy draws him in, and when his friends aren’t around, Jersey secretly seeks Koa out and friendship blossoms. At Koa’s suggestion, they become pen pals, and write to each other faithfully throughout the winters until summer comes around and they go to camp – although their friendship remains a secret from everyone else. Over the years, they develop an incredibly strong bond – until the day an unthinking action drives them apart.
Re-reading those letters, so full of childhood innocence and hope and affection, tugs at Jersey’s heart and kind of wakes him up, bringing in its wake a kind of clarity he hasn’t experienced for the past fifteen years. After his hockey career ended – due to injury – he became addicted to painkillers and, bitter and miserable at the unfairness of it all, pushed everyone away. His marriage broke down and his wife left, taking their two-year-old son with her – and when his parents tried to encourage him to seek help, he cut them out of his life as well. He hasn’t seen Koa – or even thought about him - in three decades but the letters touch him deeply, reminding him of a simpler time and of a friendship he wishes he’d held onto. He looks Koa up online and discovers that he now teaches classic literature and philosophy at an elite boarding school, which, remembering that Koa had once said he wanted to be a teacher, makes him smile. Even though he knows it might not be the best idea to intrude upon the life of a man he hasn’t seen in thirty years, and fully prepared for rejection, Jersey decides to write to Koa and suggest that maybe they could get together for a drink or coffee to “take a walk down memory lane” – because Jersey needs to apologise for the mistake he made that caused the abrupt end to their friendship, and, perhaps to try to regain something he’s lost.
Dr. Koa Bugard has forged a very carefully constructed and tightly controlled life for himself in the years since he and Jersey parted, a life built on a deeply-ingrained cynicism and nihilistic outlook that has no place for emotion or even happiness – because the only way he can live with his past is to lock away all feeling. He lives for his job, looks after his cat, and is content with his solitary existence - although he tried a relationship once, with Niles, the music teacher at the school, but it didn’t work out. Niles wanted to more from Koa than he was prepared or able to give, wanted them to make an emotional connection, and broke things off when he realised that was never going to happen. They’re still friends, though – Niles is a good guy and is determined not to let Koa opt out of social interaction completely, and it’s he who encourages him not to dismiss Jersey’s overture of friendship out of hand.
Their initial meeting is certainly awkward. Koa’s preference is to live in the present and not look back, but he decides to meet with Jersey – once – to hear what he has to say, and then that will be it. But even two weeks afterwards, Koa can’t put Jersey back into the box in his mind and forget about him, which is very frustrating. Niles encourages him to invite Jersey out to dinner – talking about Jersey’s letter and their meeting is the first time Niles has seen Koa have a strong reaction to anything so there’s clearly something there – and from then, Jersey and Koa begin seeing each other regularly. Koa tries to warn Jersey that he’ll eventually become frustrated by his perpetual indifference and what Niles calls his icy heart, but Jersey is determined not to ask more of Koa than he’s prepared to give.
Adult Jersey recognises what his teenaged self could not – that Koa must have suffered some kind of serious trauma in childhood that led to what Jersey, back then, just saw as weird behaviour. Now, though, he can see that whatever happened continues to haunt Koa and is the basis for his insistent belief that life is essentially meaningless and his inability – or unwillingness – to allow himself to feel. Jersey respects Koa’s decision to keep it to himself and makes it clear he doesn’t want to know anything Koa doesn’t want him to; he’s prepared to never know what happened if Koa doesn’t want to tell him, but he also knows that keeping it all so tightly locked away can’t be good for him. The longer their new relationship goes on, the more he begins to worry for the man he’s come to love. It’s not just that Koa can’t or won’t connect with him emotionally, it’s that his whole outlook on life is so profoundly unhealthy – and when events cause Koa’s carefully constructed walls to shatter so completely that he starts to shut down, Jersey fears he may go away and never come back.
I’m always in the market for a romance between people in mid-life, people who have been around the block a few times and for whom life hasn’t always been a bed of roses. This is so very true for Jersey and Koa; they’ve had to work incredibly hard to keep themselves on track, even if, in Koa’s case, that work hasn’t always been in his own best interest. But the love story that unfolds here is just beautiful – the author shows us the beginnings of Jersey and Koa in a series of flashbacks placed throughout the book, and then skilfully charts the development of a deep emotional bond between them in the present day. My heart broke over and over for Koa – knowing that something absolutely terrible must have happened to affect him so profoundly (although not what it was until very near the end) – and for Jersey, too, an essentially decent man who made some poor choices, who has worked hard to get his life back on track and who absolutely deserves all the love and affection in the world. I liked his gentle persistence with Koa - he’s so patient and supportive – and watching them opening up to each other and sharing things they’ve never shared with anybody was incredibly moving and statisfying.
Jersey and Koa are well-rounded, complex characters, very different in so many ways (a middle-aged jock and nerd pairing!) but who are nonetheless perfect for each other. There are only a handful of secondary characters in the story, the most vibrant of whom is Niles, who is generous and funny and kind, very protective of Koa and has his best interests at heart. He’s quickly become a reader favourite and the author has confirmed he’ll be getting a book of his own at some point. Nicky James tackles some difficult issues in the story (see her website for a full list of warnings), and her research into the effect of trauma on mental health has clearly been extensive (anyone who has read her Trials of Fear series will already know that she always takes care to be both realistic and respectful when writing about mental health issues.)
I was captivated by Jersey and Koa’s love story and their eventual, hard-won HEA brought all the feels. Promises of Forever is one of my favourite reads of 2024 so far.
This review originally appeared at All About Romance .
March 27, 2024
This was a really good book. Did I enjoy myself? Not really. This book is fucking sad. But I could not put it down!! Koa was so intriguing and really doing his best. Jersey was…there. I really wanted Koa to find happiness. I just didn’t feel like the payoff when things finally started working out lasted long enough considering how SAD most of the book was.
Huge credit to Jersey for being the perfect guy for Koa…he was so supportive. And huge credit to Niles for being the absolute best friend in the world - I can’t wait to read his story when it’s written!
I am a bit tired of reading about main characters who support their horrible family members, but the resolution of Koa and his Grandpa was something I actually really appreciated. Also, I loved Koa’s thoughts on religion. I really appreciated having a character like that.
I also just think Nicky James is an incredible writer. Even drowning in sadness, her writing is fantastic. I also want to note her use of a “green bill of health” rather than a “clean bill of health.” I see you and I appreciate you for that Nicky James!
Huge credit to Jersey for being the perfect guy for Koa…he was so supportive. And huge credit to Niles for being the absolute best friend in the world - I can’t wait to read his story when it’s written!
I am a bit tired of reading about main characters who support their horrible family members, but the resolution of Koa and his Grandpa was something I actually really appreciated. Also, I loved Koa’s thoughts on religion. I really appreciated having a character like that.
I also just think Nicky James is an incredible writer. Even drowning in sadness, her writing is fantastic. I also want to note her use of a “green bill of health” rather than a “clean bill of health.” I see you and I appreciate you for that Nicky James!
March 14, 2024
4.5 stars for Nick Russo's narrating. He does a solid job distinguishing the voices of the main MCs not just as adults but through their younger years too. His best piece of narrating comes in chapter 29 during Koa's tangent about life, death, things ending, etc. The anger and passion in it really shines through.
As to the story see original review.
As to the story see original review.
March 4, 2024
Reader, grab the tissues because Nicky James is back with all the angst you’ve been missing. If you’ve read her books before you know that she writes mental health in a way that so few do. The emotions in Koa and Jersey’s story pack an emotional punch that it was hard to put the book down. We get to know Koa and Jersey after they reconnect 30 years down the road. Koa will pull at your heart strings, and Jersey was the supportive person Koa needed in his life. The story is woven between their life as kids at camp, and present time and it felt so seamless the story wouldn’t have worked any other way. Their story was wonderful and the bond they shared could be felt coming off the page. I don’t want to spoil their story but it was a moving and emotional story that will stay with me for a long time. Highly recommend!
May 25, 2024
I am not sure about the four star rating because of the last chapters.
I admired the full development of both characters and was, for once, captivated by both story lines. Often I dislike one of the story lines as it interrupts the one I like most.
Now, about my pet peeves. I am highly disgruntled when people decide for someone else that the feelings the other has is a lesser kind of love. How dare you! I am glad the therapist in this novel did not say this, although they hinted in a good relationship you have to disclose everything, including trauma's that are better left alone. The notion survivors have to talk to heal, are more nuanced in modern medicine. It may satisfy the sensational lust of the audience, and NJ did try to balance realistic behavior of her character with the curiosity of the reader.
I disliked the whole epiphany of what happiness is and living a whole life and sharing trust and feeling true love. It is IMO different for every human being and cultural consensus makes a lot of authors write cliché endings. Add to that the hastily reconnecting with blood relatives and the ending suffers twice.
I admired the full development of both characters and was, for once, captivated by both story lines. Often I dislike one of the story lines as it interrupts the one I like most.
Now, about my pet peeves. I am highly disgruntled when people decide for someone else that the feelings the other has is a lesser kind of love. How dare you! I am glad the therapist in this novel did not say this, although they hinted in a good relationship you have to disclose everything, including trauma's that are better left alone. The notion survivors have to talk to heal, are more nuanced in modern medicine. It may satisfy the sensational lust of the audience, and NJ did try to balance realistic behavior of her character with the curiosity of the reader.
I disliked the whole epiphany of what happiness is and living a whole life and sharing trust and feeling true love. It is IMO different for every human being and cultural consensus makes a lot of authors write cliché endings. Add to that the hastily reconnecting with blood relatives and the ending suffers twice.
May 20, 2024
4.5 stars: narration by Nick J. Russo is on point as always. ❤️The story itself is heartbreaking, all the feels for Koa and Jersey (and for Niles, he’s such a good friend). 😭😭 The resolution at the end was a bit too swift for me: I would have liked to see a longer time frame, especially given how traumatic the events of the past were.
March 9, 2024
3.85 ⭐️ rounded up
I did like this book. I love the writing, the poetic nature of it, and I do think it's a truly beautiful story. But I think it was probably too dark for me in a few ways, and some bits hit a bit too close when I really didn't expect them to (not a fault of the book at all).
I am excited for Niles' story!
I did like this book. I love the writing, the poetic nature of it, and I do think it's a truly beautiful story. But I think it was probably too dark for me in a few ways, and some bits hit a bit too close when I really didn't expect them to (not a fault of the book at all).
I am excited for Niles' story!
March 26, 2024
I really like that this book made me think, and I saw so much of myself in Koa and how he thinks about things.
It's funny what major trauma and PTSD will do to your brain and how it completely changes your outlook on life, and even though this book was bleak and morbid more often than not, I actually found it very comforting to finally see a character with a very similar mindset to my own.
It's funny what major trauma and PTSD will do to your brain and how it completely changes your outlook on life, and even though this book was bleak and morbid more often than not, I actually found it very comforting to finally see a character with a very similar mindset to my own.
June 19, 2024
Very sad but beautiful second chance love story. The ending was perfect.
June 18, 2024
This one was very difficult to rate. It's well written, but I didn't really connect with it.
What I liked:
* While I don't always like flashback scenes, here I loved them, and they kind of saved the book for me. They were some much needed pages that, while still full of trauma, felt a lot lighter than the rest of the book.
* I liked the idea of summercamp childhood friends to adult lovers.
* Niles was a very good friend to Koa.
What I liked less:
* This was so, so bleak. I wouldn't necessarily call it angsty, because basically all the bad things happen off page and there's no big break-up in the present timeline, but man, it made me depressed. And I get it, I can totally see why Koa was the way he was, but it took so, so long to get him to a place where he could feel something and even then it was very tentative and mostly in roundabout ways that he showed Jersey.
* Which brings me to pacing. For me the 'I don't want to feel anything, life is meaningless' phase took way too long and the book basically stops when Koa finally lets Jersey in. I wanted to see more of them being in an equal and happy relationship.
* I didn't understand why Jersey decided to pursue a relationship with Koa after not communicating with each other for 30 years, just after reading the letters they wrote when they were teens. And then Koa was less than inviting for half the book, so what was in it for Jersey? The focus of the whole book is on Koa, but it's not like Jersey never had anything bad happen to him. Why include that, when it's never explored? The whole situation with his son is not coming up for almost the whole book and then suddenly they have a relationship again. I'm not buying it and I wish he would have put the amount of time / support he gave Koa to his son too. I think I would have liked it better if Koa and Jersey had both been in their late twenties, so there would have been a 10-year gap, instead of 30 years and Jersey had just kicked addiction and only lost a fiancee or something, no kid.
* The language was too flowery / wordy for me. In Koa's case I understood, it fit the character. But in Jersey's pov it was annoying, because he just wasn't that kind of guy. And while it made sense in Koa's character, it didn't make me like him more. He came across as pretentious too often for me.
So, I'm going to give it 3 stars, which is the middle of 2 stars for enjoyment, 4 stars for the writing quality.
What I liked:
* While I don't always like flashback scenes, here I loved them, and they kind of saved the book for me. They were some much needed pages that, while still full of trauma, felt a lot lighter than the rest of the book.
* I liked the idea of summercamp childhood friends to adult lovers.
* Niles was a very good friend to Koa.
What I liked less:
* This was so, so bleak. I wouldn't necessarily call it angsty, because basically all the bad things happen off page and there's no big break-up in the present timeline, but man, it made me depressed. And I get it, I can totally see why Koa was the way he was, but it took so, so long to get him to a place where he could feel something and even then it was very tentative and mostly in roundabout ways that he showed Jersey.
* Which brings me to pacing. For me the 'I don't want to feel anything, life is meaningless' phase took way too long and the book basically stops when Koa finally lets Jersey in. I wanted to see more of them being in an equal and happy relationship.
* I didn't understand why Jersey decided to pursue a relationship with Koa after not communicating with each other for 30 years, just after reading the letters they wrote when they were teens. And then Koa was less than inviting for half the book, so what was in it for Jersey? The focus of the whole book is on Koa, but it's not like Jersey never had anything bad happen to him. Why include that, when it's never explored? The whole situation with his son is not coming up for almost the whole book and then suddenly they have a relationship again. I'm not buying it and I wish he would have put the amount of time / support he gave Koa to his son too. I think I would have liked it better if Koa and Jersey had both been in their late twenties, so there would have been a 10-year gap, instead of 30 years and Jersey had just kicked addiction and only lost a fiancee or something, no kid.
* The language was too flowery / wordy for me. In Koa's case I understood, it fit the character. But in Jersey's pov it was annoying, because he just wasn't that kind of guy. And while it made sense in Koa's character, it didn't make me like him more. He came across as pretentious too often for me.
So, I'm going to give it 3 stars, which is the middle of 2 stars for enjoyment, 4 stars for the writing quality.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
October 5, 2024
It’s more like 3.5 rounded up. Kinda slow. Very melancholy, like Koa.
BTW, what kind of name is Jersey and Derby????
Anyway… not a lot of steam either. But the writing is fine.
BTW, what kind of name is Jersey and Derby????
Anyway… not a lot of steam either. But the writing is fine.
March 3, 2024
I usually buy NJ’s books upon release and love them. I just didn’t enjoy the story or characters of this one. One total loser who abandoned his entire family for 15 years and never bothered to try to reconnect with his kid or parents and another who was emotionless and unavailable after severe childhood trauma.
I was very bored.
I was very bored.
March 1, 2024
My first read for 2024, and what a great way to start!!
This story takes place 30 years after 10-year-old Koa and Jersey first met at summer camp.
Koa was the odd kid, who played with his imaginary friend. He was the kid that got teased because of his strange behaviour. Jersey was the popular kid. A jock in the making.
Somehow, they became friends, exchanging hand-written letters when not at camp.
Until they weren't.
30 years later, Jersey finds a box of treasures his mom stored away. A box full of memories. A box full of regrets. He decides to reconnect with his long-lost friend, Koa, hoping to right wrongs.
This is the beginning of a heartfelt, heartbreaking, second chance romance.
This book is a perfect example of what Nicky James does best. She promised us "old-school Nicky, back to higher angst and touching on some heavier mental health topics", and she delivered.
As expected, this book, along with her other mental health books are so very well written and with the utmost respect.
Koa has my heart. For most of the book, we don't know the "what" in Koa's past that shaped his life, but all his hurt is on full display. He needs all the love, and Jersey is just the man for the job. Jersey is the man to help keep the demons at bay.
Promises of Forever isn't an easy read, it will pull at your heartstrings and break your heart. The journey to their HEA is hard-fought. If you're a sucker like me for a great story with characters of substance, then I would definitely suggest this book.
This story takes place 30 years after 10-year-old Koa and Jersey first met at summer camp.
Koa was the odd kid, who played with his imaginary friend. He was the kid that got teased because of his strange behaviour. Jersey was the popular kid. A jock in the making.
Somehow, they became friends, exchanging hand-written letters when not at camp.
Until they weren't.
30 years later, Jersey finds a box of treasures his mom stored away. A box full of memories. A box full of regrets. He decides to reconnect with his long-lost friend, Koa, hoping to right wrongs.
This is the beginning of a heartfelt, heartbreaking, second chance romance.
This book is a perfect example of what Nicky James does best. She promised us "old-school Nicky, back to higher angst and touching on some heavier mental health topics", and she delivered.
As expected, this book, along with her other mental health books are so very well written and with the utmost respect.
Koa has my heart. For most of the book, we don't know the "what" in Koa's past that shaped his life, but all his hurt is on full display. He needs all the love, and Jersey is just the man for the job. Jersey is the man to help keep the demons at bay.
Promises of Forever isn't an easy read, it will pull at your heartstrings and break your heart. The journey to their HEA is hard-fought. If you're a sucker like me for a great story with characters of substance, then I would definitely suggest this book.
February 29, 2024
3.5 stars
I was pretty excited by this book, but it just wasn't for me. It was well written and descriptive, and it could translate emotions really well. I just wasn't into the whole traumatic past and emotionally disconnection. I expected a hurt/comfort book, and it was full of angst and apathy. I totally understand why that was necessary for the hero. It just wasn't my cup of tea.
I really liked the flashbacks to camp. They were really cute at that age, and it was great to see them slowly discover their feelings.
I did feel like the end was somewhat rushed. For a while I though this might go into a second book, because I didn't know how they could wrap it up in less than 50 pages, when there had been little progress in the previous 200 pages. There wasn't any kind of progress going on in Koa opening up, and suddenly, he does, and everything is fixed?
Anyway, if you are into angst and slowly chipping at someone's walls, you might like it.
I was pretty excited by this book, but it just wasn't for me. It was well written and descriptive, and it could translate emotions really well. I just wasn't into the whole traumatic past and emotionally disconnection. I expected a hurt/comfort book, and it was full of angst and apathy. I totally understand why that was necessary for the hero. It just wasn't my cup of tea.
I really liked the flashbacks to camp. They were really cute at that age, and it was great to see them slowly discover their feelings.
I did feel like the end was somewhat rushed. For a while I though this might go into a second book, because I didn't know how they could wrap it up in less than 50 pages, when there had been little progress in the previous 200 pages. There wasn't any kind of progress going on in Koa opening up, and suddenly, he does, and everything is fixed?
Anyway, if you are into angst and slowly chipping at someone's walls, you might like it.
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