8-Bit Christmas

by Kevin Jakubowski

It’s 1980-something and all nine-year-old Jake Doyle wants for Christmas is a Nintendo Entertainment System. No Jose Canseco rookie card, no GI Joe hovercraft, no Teddy friggin’ Ruxpin—just Nintendo. But when a hyperactive Shih Tzu is accidentally crushed to death by a forty-two- inch television set and every parent in town blames Nintendo, it’s up to Jake to take matters into his own hands. The result is a Christmas quest of Super Mario Bros. proportions, filled with flaming wreaths, speeding minivans, lost retainers, fake Santas, hot teachers, snotty sisters, “Super Bowl Shuffles” and one very naked Cabbage Patch Kid. Told from a nostalgic adult perspective, 8-Bit Christmas is a hilarious and heartfelt look back at the kid pop culture of the 1980s.

Genres: Christmas, Fiction, Humor, Holiday, Historical Fiction, Video Games, Adult

288 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 1, 2013

About the author

A native of Batavia, Illinois, Kevin Jakubowski is a film and television writer best known for the Bruce Willis comedy Assassination of a High School President and for his work on the Comedy Central series Brickleberry. He has written and co-written scripts for Warner Brothers, Paramount, Lionsgate, Sony and Fox and is currently developing his own animated series at Nickelodeon. He lives in California with his wife and his Nintendo. 8-Bit Christmas is his first novel.

Reviews

[Yoly · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a child of the 80s I loved this! It feels like "A Christmas Story" for our generation :)

[Wendi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent Book!

Very nostalgic! As a child of the 1980s, the whole book was a trip down memory lane. Engaging and fun. I thoroughly enjoyed it. For those who were there, this book is an experience, and reminds us of a simpler time when video games were still new and kids played outside. Magnificent ending! Definitely recommend this book to anyone who grew up in the 80s, especially those who caught Nintendo fever!

[Ericka Stark · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book! Brings me straight back to my own 1980's childhood. Even better if you are a Wisconsinite as this IL native takes funny jabs at us through the whole book!

[Heather · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm a little too young to identify with the NES craze here - having been born midway through the NES console cycle - but dammit I wanted a Cabbage Patch and got one when I was 3 or 4 🤣

My parents had a Nintendo when I was growing up. I wasn't allowed to touch it except under supervision for fear that I'd screw up my mother's progress on Zelda.

Nonetheless, a cute Christmas story that was a walk down memory lane

[Trisha · Rating 4 out of 5]

***Thank you to NetGalley for providing this free ARC copy.

I put this on the "children's literature" shelf, even though it's narrated by an adult looking back on his Nintento-crazed childhood. But really I think it's a book adults would love more - particularly adults who were children of the '80s, like I was.

Story:
Narrator Jake is 9 years old when the first glorious grey Nintendo Entertainment System hits the market. The richest and most spoiled kid in town gets a Nintendo and all the other kids are suddenly swarming onto his front lawn, looking for new ways to suck up to him so they can have a turn on his NES. He only lets 10 kids in at a time on weekends, so the stakes are high and the competition fierce. Kids even go so far as to surrender some of their best toys just so they can go down to the basement and Nintendo-land.

All over town, kids are plotting how to get their parents to give them Nintendos for Christmas. But when disaster strikes - starting with a kid's tantrum, and leading to a falling TV and ultimately a squashed dog - the town's parents are up in arms about the evils of Nintendo. The only NES in town is no longer available for weekend tournaments, and the kids are getting desperate. The parents even go so nuts they arrange for local stores to stop stocking NESes on their shelves. All the kids in Jake's class are now kissing their dreams of owning a NES of their own goodbye. But Jake isn't giving up on his dream. A stroke of inspiration gives him a new plan for how to save the town from being Nintendoless forever.

My thoughts:
I LOVED this book. As a child of the '80s, but also has someone who can apparently appreciate Kevin Jakubowski's sense of humour, I was snorting with laughter at almost every turn of a page (so to speak, as I read this on Kindle). Some parts of the book seemed a bit odd to me, like some of the dialogue used - I'm not sure that today's slang was used back in the '80s, even though I was there at the time. I guess my memory is a bit rusty by now. But there were a few occasions when I frowned over a certain choice of word that seemed more suited to the current day than to the '80s. I also found myself disappointed with the fact that Jake didn't get a NES for Christmas - even though he got something seriously awesome instead (and no, I don't mean the Lite Brite. haha). But yeah, all in all I thought this was a hilarious read and I would recommend it to anyone who a) can relate to an obsessive love/fondness for Nintendo (I myself had a Super NES, and it was still beautifully lumpy and grey), b) loves the '80s, or c) wants to enjoy a large number of laughs (it's the best medicine after all).

[Desiree · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very funny story! At one point, I was laughing so hard that I had tears running down my cheeks! In fact, it is still making me laugh!

The author takes us back to the 1980's and tells the story of a nine year old boy whose only goal in life is to score a Nintendo Entertainment System. Sure, he likes his baseball cards, his teacher and other things, but nothing else comes close to the Nintendo. When the rich kid in town is the only owner of the brand new system, he lords it over the rest of the boys. They will do just about anything to play with him, or even watch him play.

After things turn tragic, all the adults end up hating the system, which only makes it worse. Nintendo-no-friendo! lol! Planning, scheming, bargaining and begging Santa are just some of the ways he thinks of to get his very own gaming machine!

I definitely recommend this lighthearted, fun and immensely enjoyable read, even if it is not Christmas time!

[Bryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 Stars Rounded Up.
What a delightful read. I loved the movie when I first saw it a few Christmases ago, and had always been curious about the book. Then "St Nick" brought it this year and I devoured it. Yea, the book is always better, but the movie is VERY true to its source material. If you are a fan of the movie, you will love this book. If you are a fan of 80s and 90s nostalgia, you will love this book. If you are a fan of the Holiday Season, you will love this book. If you want to laugh, and be moved all in the same, brief read, you will love this book.
I just think you should read it. I plan to more than once, and probably as soon as next Christmas.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Super fun fast read. Especially meaningful to Batavians as there are numerous references to our town. Between all the town references and all of the 80's references it was super fun.

[Bean · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5, A Christmas Story for the child of the 80s. It was warm nostalgia, had holiday spirit without being sickly sweet. Fast fun read.

[Travis · Rating 4 out of 5]

8-Bit Christmas Nostalgia.
I'm sure I've over done it. "Nintendo Christmas," as I call it. The Best Christmas, I can recall as a child, was the one I received a Nintendo Entertainment System. I continue to add to my "Nintendo Christmas Nostalgia" collection. I have a small tree dedicated to Mario. The family tree has Nintendo ornaments, I have Nintendo shirts, and now I have a Nintendo book AND the accompanying movie.
This season, I started with a borrowing this book from Kindle Unlimited. I then realized that I HAD to have the hard copy... and the movie. I also acquired an NES Christmas, full-zip hoodie, to wear during my Christmas break. Which I planned to finish the book during, and watch the movie. My plans are coming along swimmingly.
I'm looking forward to reading this again next year.
My only complaint is the language. I was a little startled to read the Lord's name in vain, in a CHRISTMAS book! Oh well, I'll black it out.
Merry Nintendo Christmas!

[Simon Lawrence · Rating 4 out of 5]

Packed full of 80s references that made me nostalgic, I really enjoyed the story even though it wasn’t Christmas-time. The ending, whilst clever, felt very abrupt but that’s my only gripe; as many other reviews point out, this is a story full of warmth and humour. It’s not just for Christmas! I need to watch the film version now to compare…

[Kari Kruchko · Rating 3 out of 5]

Growing up in the Midwest in the 80s , this was a very nostalgic read.

[Kate · Rating 3 out of 5]

My last book read of 2021! While parts of it were great (all the times with the dad driving just killed me), I do have to say the movie is better. I felt the same way about A Christmas Story, so I guess it's on trend for me?

This is still a fun Christmas read, and a bit of a nostalgic ride for me, as I too am a child of the 80s. I was not a huge gamer (and hey, we had Atari because my pops loved buying new tech- we had a Beta and a VCR!), but I did get a Nintendo Gameboy later on and it was awesome.

[Christine · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mostly amusing. I appreciated a lot of the nostalgia. Deducted a star for the excessive baseball.

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

such a fun holiday read full of 80s nostalgia. Laugh out loud moments, super relatable and a lot of fun!

[Seth Heasley · Rating 3 out of 5]

A Christmas Story meets 1980s nostalgia. A bit of RPO, a bit of The Music Man as well.

I enjoyed the nostalgia, since he was basically narrating my childhood. It's not a great book, but it's fun for a child of the 80s.

[BookSinArt · Rating 4 out of 5]

2022 Review:
~8-Bit Christmas by Kevin Jakubowski
eBook
Finished: 1.6.22
JSR: 📚📚📚📚

“If you grew up in the sixties, you probably remember where you were when you first saw the Beatles or where you were when the astronauts landed on the moon. Well, I grew up in the eighties. There wasn’t all that much to remember. The Challenger space shuttle disaster? I blocked that out years ago. The Berlin Wall? I’m pretty sure I was at a soccer practice making fart noises out of blades of grass when it went down. So really, my clearest, most vivid memory of the years 1982 to 1989 was watching Timmy Kleen unwrap the town’s first Nintendo Entertainment System.”

SynopsiSexxy: I LOVED this book! It is pure fun enjoyment. Wildly funny—literally LOL’d throughout the reading. The 80’s references were spot on, the nostalgia was heartwarming. Jakubowski’s witty snark is tremendously fun to read. The story is told in flashback through the protagonist, Jake Doyle.
Honestly this is A Christmas Story (movie) based in the 80’s with NES replacing Red Rider BB Gun. I specify “movie” b/c the A Christmas Story novel is way different than the movie. It’s told in flashback form as well, but not like the movie at all.
Reading 8-Bit felt like watching A Christmas Story. I even had Jean Shepard’s voice in my head while I was reading it. The book also encapsulates Xmas/holiday tropes we’ve come to expect from Xmas/holiday books/movies—that love, family, health, are far greater than the material objects we pine for. But it doesn’t do it in a schmaltzy cloyingly sweet way. It tickles your funny bone throughout and hugs your heart.
I especially felt emotional towards the end. When Jake gets an unexpected Xmas gift from “Santa”. It changes how he sees & feels about his dad. Growing up with little contact with my father—Saturday’s & holiday’s only, and even that was only for half a day, less if he just left us with our abuela y abuelo—I couldn’t relate to the love, admiration, and respect Jake came to have for his dad. I loved my father, he was my dad no matter what, but it never felt reciprocated. I thought of my kids. Am I a hero to them? Someone to respect and look up to? Will they think of me as Jake thinks of his dad? I hope so.
IDK if it was the absence of bonding with my father, or the anxiety of not being a good father myself that led to the emotional reaction. Probably both.
It’s a little crazy to be laughing throughout a book and then wham! feel bittersweet with tears welling up and threatening to spill over.
Overall: Well-written, great character development, familiar-but-solid-plot, funny, witty, snarky, emotional, and nostalgic. It has earned a spot on my annual re-read list.

“From that moment on, I saw my dad a little differently. He was more than a guy who drove too fast and could never quite finish remodeling the kitchen. He was a magician. He was a hero. He was Santa Claus.”

Though my father is not my hero, I hope I am to my kids.

💙🎄💙

2023 Revue:
Started: 12.8.23
Finished: 12.29.23
~8-Bit Christmas by Kevin Jakubowski | #ebook #Reread
#JayBookSexxy2023Boal Book.140
See 2022 review. It holds up.

[Medeia Sharif · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jake Doyle wants a Nintendo for Christmas. It’s the 80’s and all his friends have to line up outside Timmy Kleen’s house, fawning over and bribing him to be let inside since he has the neighborhood's only Nintendo. The game system is hypnotic. But when something wacky, unexpected, and dangerous happens, Nintendo is banned in their small town of Batavia, Illinois.

There’s no stopping Jake from trying to get his own system, though. He’ll help his sister get a Cabbage Patch Kid if she helps him get a Nintendo. He’ll attempt to sell the most Cub Scout wreaths for the chance to win the prize of a gaming system. He and his friends will make the utmost sacrifice to pool their money together to buy their own. Time after time, Jake and his friends face the frustrations of not being able to acquire a Nintendo. Christmas is nearing. Maybe Santa will grant Jake’s wish.

This book was laugh out loud funny. Also, I loved the suburban setting, Jake’s parents and other secondary characters, the nostalgia, and all the names of the candy, toys, and shows of the 80s. I recall many of the games mentioned, and yes they were addictive, so I completely understood where Jake was coming from. Great writing and a trip back in time made this a delight to read. I read this via NetGalley, courtesy of the publisher.

[Kevin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've had my eye on this book for a few years but was never able to track it down. Then came the movie version (with Neil Patrick Harris) and I scored a copy for Christmas. I saw the movie first, which meant I was able to read the book with Harris' voiceover firmly in mind (even though the framing of Harris telling the story isn't in the book). The movie was fun, and the book is as well. It's a longer, slightly different version, but still hits all the good points and a few more. It takes a few different turns than the movie, but all the 80s nostalgia and then some is there. Honestly, it probably could have benefited from some editing and been 50 or 100 pages shorter, but it's all good Christmas fun. It's like the Christmas Story for the 80s.

[Clint Hannah-Lopez · Rating 4 out of 5]

I actually read this book after seeing the HBO Max film of the same name, which was actually also written by Mr. Jakubowski. While there were some changes made for the film, both gave me the same sense of sweet nostalgia. It's heavy on the 80's references, but it really captures that feeling of being a kid--wanting one gift, not wanting anyone to know you like your teacher, people not understanding how important the unimportant things are. I'm not sure all of the details will stick with me forever, but it was a really fun read.

[Hannah · Rating 4 out of 5]

A flashback in a book. I guess this is what our parents felt like when they watched A Christmas Story for the first time. All the little pop culture things that make you say "I remember that". This book was great, the banning of The Nintendo Entertainment System county wide, and all he wants for Christmas is a Nintendo. The schemes and the hijinks are hilarious, I hope they make a movie of this so I can watch A Christmas Story and this back to back.

[Marc Storey · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are a male (probably) and of a certain age (definitely) then this will appeal if you had a desire for a games console for Christmas-i did- and this is about this and as I write (December) is poignant, funny and one of the best books of the year. Only because it means so much but also the way Christmas Day and the building dis written about, would mean more to our American cousins but even to this brit meant a whole bunch......

[Mark Sidarous · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you grew up in Chicagoland in the 80s and loved pop-culture, particularly the Nintendo Entertainment System, this is a super narrow nostalgia trip. I fit neatly in that category, so I thoroughly enjoyed it. If you're not in that bin, it still might be worth a read as an 80s bildungsroman in the style of Sandlot, A Christmas Story, and Goonies.

[Kate Lantry · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious love story to the 80's!

I couldn't stop smiling the entire time I read this book! It's truly A Christmas Story for the 80's generation. A bucket load of nostalgia wrapped up in a trip down memory lane and topped with a bow. Hilarious escapades of a boy and his sister who just want Nintendo and a Cabbage Patch doll. What could possibly go wrong??

[Robert · Rating 4 out of 5]

While this book is certainly not the next 'A Christmas Carol,' it is definitely a unique work which manages to capture the spirit of the season. The characters are lovable, with all their quirks and are surely destined to bring back great memories from an era just as classic as Christmas itself.

[Kenya Starflight · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a child of the 80s, I'm always curious to see how media set in the 80s portrays the decade. Some works feel authentic, while others... not so much. It takes more than listing off pop-culture tidbits to make something feel authentic to its time period, after all. "8-Bit Christmas" is one of those works that actually pulls this off well... and as a bonus, gives us a hilarious and festive tale that will entertain those who consider "A Christmas Story" a classic.

It's the 80s, and just like every boy in his neighborhood, all Jake wants for Christmas is a Nintendo Entertainment System. But when a classmate accidently knocks a TV onto the family dog during a Nintendo freak out, it prompts the entire town to ban Nintendo! Jake is determined to get his coveted Nintendo, though... and gets up to some wild shenanigans in his quest. Whether it's a crush on an art teacher, the horror of wearing girl's snow boots to school, a Boy Scout fundraiser that turns into open warfare, or a back-alley Cabbage Patch salesman, there's no end of craziness this holiday season.

80s references litter this book, as you might expect -- from Transformers to Wham! to the Cold War to getting a free pizza for reading enough books (btw Pizza Hut, please make a grown-up version of Book It, thank you...). But they feel integrated into the plot and done in a way that feels authentic, instead of as a way to go "look how 80s we are!" People who grew up in this era will find something to relate to in this book... and people who didn't live through the 80s or don't remember much of it can still smile and nod at eccentric family members, small-town/suburban craziness, and holiday madness.

While this isn't a perfect read -- some plot threads don't feel tied up too well in the end -- it was still a hilarious book. Jake's antics and those of his family and friends had me howling. But there's also some thoughtful moments and an ultimately sweet closure to the story, despite everything. And for all their bratty flaws, the kids still feel earnest and wholly invested in what makes them passionate, whether it's baseball cards or Nintendo or Christmas.

If "A Christmas Story" had been filmed in the 80s, it would probably turn out much like this book. It was a fun festive ride, and makes me want to check out the movie now...

[Amber | afterthepages · Rating 4 out of 5]

NINTENDO….NINTENDO….NINTENDO!!!!!!

As a child of the 1980’s, this book took me down memory lane in so many ways:
• watching the movie “Harry and the Hendersons”
• watching the TV show “Inspector Gadget”
• collecting and trading “Garbage Pail Kids” cards (had tons of these things, wish I still had them)
• playing Super Mario Bros. (my fave game for the 8-bit entertainment system)
• playing Duck Hunt
• Tang (for those of you who may not know what this is, it’s a drink)
• Molly Ringwald
• The Beckett
• Art class (dressed in my dad’s backward-dress-shirt as a smock, to stay clean of course!)
• watching the TV show “Family Double Dare” (who remembers the game “Pick It” from this show? LOL)
• Pound Puppies (stuffed animal)
• watching the movie “The Goonies” (“Goonies never say die”….am I right?)
• Cabbage Patch dolls (those cute red-haired dolls)
• Teddy Ruxpin (had one of these, and loved it)
• “Choose Your Own Adventure” books (absolutely loved these as a kid)
• Wham (who still listens to their popular “Last Christmas” song”?)

In this cute Christmas-themed story, the author flashes back to the 1980’s. He tells the story of a young 9-year-old boy (Jake Doyle) who has only one goal for the holidays, and that’s to score a “NINTENDO”. The book takes you on an adventure that includes dog accidents, flaming wreaths, speeding minivans, lost retainers, exiting a school field trip, and so much more. If you love the movie “A Christmas Story”, you will love this book as it gives off similar vibes. This hilarious and festive tale makes you feel like a kid again.
*Sidenote: After reading the book, I watched the movie “8-Bit Christmas” that came out in 2021, and it was very similar to the book. There were some small differences, but nothing major. It was a cute movie.

[Zach Koenig · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pretty much everyone has seen "A Christmas Story", right? Well, swap out Ralphie's Red Ryder BB gun (1950s) for a Nintendo Entertainment System (1980s), and that is the gist of "8-Bit Christmas".

For a basic plot summary, this book tells the story of Jake Doyle a mid-80s grade schooler who wants a Nintendo more than anything else in the world. Of course, a series of events transpire against his one Christmas wish, leaving the fate of his NES quest undecided until the final pages.

Though I am actually "a bit old" for this novel (I was more of a "90s kid" than an "80s kid"), I was able to easily relate to its theme. I was a "Nintendo kid" growing up (NES, SNES, N64...you name it!), so I could sympathize with young Jake's plight! Author Kevin Jakubowski really is able to get inside the head of what it is like to be a grade school child.

Is "8-Bit Christmas" an all-time classic? Probably not. In all honesty, it is a bit too derivative of "A Christmas Story" to carve its own niche in holiday literature. Plus, I think Jakubowski made a couple of little blunders (3rd graders still potentially believing in Santa Claus?!) that sometimes strained credibility.

Overall, though, this was just a really fun read that brought me back to childhood. Isn't that what the Christmas season is all about?

[Arminzerella · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jake Doyle, 3rd grader/cub scout/baseball card collector, has to deal with school bullies, being forced to wear "girl" boots, unrequited love for his art teacher, and a younger sister who's quite possibly smarter than him. He's a pretty typical kid growing up in the 1980s in Batavia, Illinois. His world is turned upsidedown when Nintendo releases its first game system and the only kid in town that owns it is a volatile, hyperactive brat by the name of Kleen. Soon all the boys in their class are cozying up to Kleen to get playtime, and covering for Kleen so his parents will buy him new games for good behavior and grades. But each of them is fervently hoping to receive a Nintendo for Christmas, and they'll do almost anything to make their dreams come true.

Hilarious! This will bring back memories for anyone who grew up in the 80s when Nintendo and Cabbage Patch Kids were all the rage, and as kids you had to depend on Santa to make your dreams come true. A Christmas story for the 80s.

[Richard · Rating 3 out of 5]

This one's been sitting on my kindle for years, and I figured now was a good time to read it, especially with the film adaption now out. All the buzz I heard was "A Christmas Story in the 1980s" over and over, and after reading it, I can't help but think this was the blatant approach, because everything down to the sibling with the oversized snowsuit and getting your tongue frozen to something was here, just replace the Red Ryder Carbine Action 200-shot Range Model Air Rifle with a Nintendo Entertainment System, something I couldn't really relate to as a child because when I asked for mine for my 8th birthday, there was no backlash and every other kid in my town got theirs too. The book does get props for mostly staying accurate to the details, when so many other books would use the generic "Pac-Man 2600" sound effects, although one nitpick is Mega Man 2 would not be available to purchase in Chicago until the following year. It's an entertaining read, but you just can't help but draw comparisons throughout it. And oh god, that ending pissed me off....