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Made to Be She: Reclaiming God's Plan for Fearless Femininity

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What does it mean to be a woman? What makes her her? Why are there differences between men and women? What do we lose as progressive movements try to erase those differences? And where do we go from here?With insight and passion, the founders of Girl Defined Ministries confront the confusion of our culture and the conflicting voices of the feminist movement in order to bring clarity to the biblical womanhood found in God's Word. This book will help you sort through the noise to develop a clear understanding of who God made you to be so you can stand firm and fearless despite the shifting winds of our society.With a discussion guide at the end of each chapter to help you dig deeper, this book makes an excellent choice for women's book clubs and Bible study groups or the perfect read to share with a friend over coffee.

272 pages, Paperback

Published November 12, 2024

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About the author

Kristen Clark

13 books209 followers
Kristen Clark is married to her high school sweetheart, Zack, and has a background in Biblical counseling, young women's ministry, teen mentoring, online blogging, and is the co-founder of GirlDefined Ministries. She and her sister, Bethany, are passionate about fighting feminism, embracing gender distinctions, and empowering young women to live out their God defined purpose. You can read her weekly blog posts at girldefined.com or follow her on Facebook at facebook.com/girldefined.

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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
Profile Image for Erin Cataldi.
2,552 reviews66 followers
October 23, 2025
This is a complicated review to write. There were a lot of areas I wholeheartedly agreed with and areas that I was appalled at. As a Catholic, one of the things I try to do most, is love thy neighbor. It's easy to judge others, but easy isn't right and we are not the judge, only God is. This book held a lot of judgment toward others - working mothers, divorced women, transgender individuals, non-Christian women, and more. It ruined a lot of the good message the authors were trying to get across. I love that they discussed the harm that the purity culture movement caused, the snares of the beauty industry, and falling into religious ditches. As another reviewer mentioned, some of those chapters could have been greatly expanded and been whole books. The authors chose to dedicate a lot of time however on transgendered men and women and casting judgement their way. Trans women existing doesn't diminish me as a woman. I love that I am a woman. Trans women aren't trying to take my rights away, but you know who is... men. All the time. Another chapter talked about how important it was to be a mother and to stay at home with your children. Well wouldn't that be nice. But in this economy... Come on. Nowhere in that chapter did the authors talk about the rising cost of housing or food. They mention how sad they felt for single mothers ONCE. The rest of the chapter was lamenting how much moms are missing out on by working. What about the dads? They are missing those moments too! If we are called to go forth and procreate in this awful American economy then most mothers will have to work. We unfortunately live in a time that demands that both parents work. We CAN'T have it all. Most women I know would love to stay home but can't. Most women I know would love to have more kids but can't afford to. The authors mention none of that. Another point I took issue with was that the authors villainized every wave of feminism and gave an awful over simplified view of them all. No mention of the benefits we got, only the negative downsides. We can own property, we can have credit cards, we can get custody of our children. They mentioned women getting the right to vote like it was a bad thing because the men should get the vote of the household... but even if that were the case what about unmarried or widowed women?! The final thing I take issue with is the oversimplified science of sex. According to the authors there are only males and females with absolutely NO VARIATIONS WHATSOEVER. However, intersex variations and hermaphroditism demonstrate that sex exists on a spectrum, and in some species, individuals do not fit neatly into a simple male/female binary. So I guess people born intersex can go jump off a cliff? I mean, what the heck. They are people too. Sorry they don't fit neatly in your little box. Not everything is black and white. Love one another. So actually now that I've typed all this out... maybe there wasn't that much good in here.
Profile Image for Corey.
426 reviews2 followers
January 13, 2025
So this is a nightmare.

Apparently when your marriage is falling apart what you do about that as a Christian woman is write a bizarre rambling tirade of a book that is 300 pages of misogyny, fundamental misunderstandings of societal issues, and weird fetishisation of motherhood. Also the book is transphobic for extra spice. The authors (and people like them) want to be oppressed for having the dominant cultural viewpoint of the entire western world and will just make up fake nonsense to feel that they are. When the book isn't spewing misinformation or outright bigotry it's ignoring important cultural context in order to demonize complex historical figures. Also Marilyn Monroe was famously abused and the fact that she was famously abused likely played a much larger role in her untimely death than any lack of "godliness" ever could.
Profile Image for Grace J.
83 reviews1 follower
August 31, 2025
I believe the authors of this book had the best of intentions. From what I've heard, they are godly women who have a passion for defending Biblical truths, and I was grateful for a number of things they discussed in this book.

That being said, this book unfortunately was a disappointment for a number of reasons.

My overarching problem with the book was that it tried to cover too many topics. Instead of dealing in-depth with any one topic, the book just skims over many different ones.

Also, the book claims to be about what it means to be a woman according to the Bible, but the book doesn't dive deeply into any Biblical passages (no discussion of alternating viewpoints, very little scholarly interpretation, etc.). The only large Bible passages discussed are Genesis 2 and Ephesians 5, and the analysis consisted mostly of the authors' thoughts. The Bible has 1,189 chapters with female characters as varied as you can imagine. You cannot use 2, maybe 4, passages to determine what a woman should be like.

Below is my break-down for each chapter.

Chapter 1: Seduced by the Cosmo Girl
An introduction - no thoughts.

Chapter 2: The Ditch of Feminist Womanhood
What I liked: I appreciated the emphasis on how some feminists create a men vs. women mentality, when in reality it should be us vs. sin.

What I disliked: This could have been an entire book. Instead, a couple hundred years of American history is boiled down into 15ish pages. The result is a summary that lacks nuance and important details. and paints a wholly negative view of all 4 waves of feminism. There is no discussion of any of the benefits that came with some of the waves of feminism (such as the changes in women's property rights, custody rights, etc.). I'm not what the authors would consider a feminist--but even I would say their explanation of feminism was overly-simplistic and unfair.

Chapter 3: The Ditch of Religious Womanhood
What I liked: I appreciated that they called out at least some of the negative aspects of purity culture, such as how it created pride and/or shame instead of a focus on God. (I wish they'd gone farther in addressing the harmful effects of purity culture, though, as discussed in books like "She Deserves Better".) They do touch a little bit on the Christian tendency to idolize the roles of wife and mother (though I would argue that, though they explicitly call it out, they really don't discuss what alternatives there are).

What I disliked: Rather than discussing the nuances and differing ideas in Christian circles regarding Christian womanhood, the authors assume one position is correct and criticize all others. For example, the authors clearly disagree with egalitarianism and paint it in a very negative light. They clearly agree with complementarianism and say outright that the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood was "a much-needed movement that helped bring clarity to the Christian church." There isn't much room for a reader who doesn't fit their camp--a reader like me who isn't quite a complementarian or an egalitarian.

Chapter 4: When Being a Royal Isn't Enough
What I liked: This chapter starts out really well. It emphasizes that "gospel-redeemed womanhood" begins not with what you do but whose you are.

What I disliked: I was disappointed that the list of virtues seen in a "gospel-redeemed" woman were drawn solely from Proverbs 31 and Titus 2. I'm not saying these are bad passages--but women are called to more virtues than just those found in those two chapters. Women and men are called to be patient, courageous, kind, strong, kind, hardworking, respectful, just, etc.

Chapter 5: Rejecting Weak and Wimpy Womanhood
I appreciated this chapter and its discussion of the need for women to really study the Bible, not just skim it or pick out their favorite verses.

Chapter 6: Made to Be He and She
What I liked: The authors at least brought up the fact that "ezer" in Genesis 2:18 is used elsewhere in the Bible to describe the Lord. (Complaint: though the authors discuss "ezer", they don't even mention "kenegdo", which is half of the phrase translated "helper").

What I disliked: I honestly really took issue with this chapter. The authors discuss Genesis 2 and draw 12 principles out, 6 for men and 6 for men. This should have been a whole book wherein the authors dive deep into the original language, discuss different viewpoints, and provide ample scholarly research. It was not. It was primarily based on the writers' own interpretations of the story.
For the men, they argue the following: men are the providers and leaders...
- because Adam was created first
- because Adam was created outside of the garden and brought into it
- because God gave Adam his commands and told Adam to pass them along to Eve
- because Adam was created to "work [the garden] and keep it,"
- because Adam was told to name all things.
For the women, they argue the following: essentially, women are defined by their relation to men...
- women are those who produce life by responding to the man's pursuit
- women are the soft partners that "[respond] favorably to a man's strength and protection,"
- women respond to godly leadership
- a woman's identity is found in "how well she connects in her relationships,"
- a woman's purpose is to help men glorify God.
Complaint 1: these principles, especially for men, are primarily based on analogies--not actually scholarly research.
Complaint 2: you can argue that these principles apply in marriage, but the authors go a step further and argue that these 6 principles are true of all men and women. Not only is a wife is meant to be her husband's helper, but women are meant to be men's helpers. The whole sex of women exists to help the whole sex of men glorify God. All men are those who go out into the world to work, provide for the home, spiritually lead, and exercise leadership. All women are those who respond to men, are led, and are those who exist to help men. The authors explicitly state that these principles are "at the core of God's design for womanhood". I take major issue with this claim. What about unmarried women? Women who can't have children? Outspoken, determined women? A woman who owns a company?
These are dangerous, harmful ideas--and, I would argue, unbiblical. 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 clearly states that an unmarried woman's focus is on serving the Lord, not on helping the sex of men to serve the Lord. Yes, that is different in marriage--but the authors nowhere make that distinction. They apply these principles to all men and women, never distinguishing between married and single.

Chapter 7: God's Radical Design for Marriage and Sex
This chapter should have been a whole book. Also, I think the authors would have benefited from reading "Beyond Authority and Submission" before they boiled wives' purposes down to submission, receiving, reflecting, and responding.

Chapter 8: When She Decides to Become He
Not a bad chapter, but, again, could have been an entire book.

Chapter 9: Falling for the Birth Control Pill
This chapter was waaaaayyy too broad and vague. I'm not sure what the chapter was arguing--Margaret Sanger was crazy? All contraceptives are wrong? The birth control pill is wrong? Abortion is wrong? Not wanting to be a mother is wrong? This chapter could so easily confuse and mislead girls. In the authors' good desire to protest a bad thing, they end up muddling their arguments and don't clearly define what they are criticizing. It made me think of some of the messages Jinger Duggar had to work through, as discussed in "Becoming Free Indeed".

Chapter 10: Trading in Motherhood for a Career
Essentially, the argument in this chapter is that women belong in the home with the kids, not out in a career. The authors make vague, scary claims about how mothers who trade motherhood for a career harm their children's emotional development and miss out on their children's milestones. But, clearly some careers are okay (both women are speakers, authors, and run an organization). Even more: not once in this whole chapter is the father mentioned. Isn't the father also missing out on his children's milestones? Why is that more okay for the father to miss than the mothers? I'm sure the authors have an answer to that question, but they never give it.
Also, arguments are primarily drawn from Titus 2:3-5--three verses. You should not be convincing women to rework their entire life based on three Bible verses when you haven't even discussed scholarly interpretation or cultural context.
Also, the authors would have done well to have considered whether their idea that women belong at home is based in the Bible or cultural traditions (such as the Cult of Domesticity, Greek/Roman ideas about women belonging at home--see "Beyond Submission and Authority").

Chapter 11: Chasing Beauty at All Costs
Not a bad chapter, but, again, could have been an entire book.

Chapter 12: I'm a W.O.M.A.N.
Something of a conclusion to the book.

Chapter 13: Living Out Fearless Femininity
Conclusion
Profile Image for Kristi Drillien.
Author 4 books25 followers
January 29, 2025
In today's culture, lines of gender and sexuality appear to be blurred, but that comes as no surprise at a time when truth is seen as relative and each person is told to follow his or her heart wherever it leads. But there is an absolute authority on truth, including a distinct line between man and woman. That absolute authority is the Creator of man and woman—and the entire universe—and He has given us everything we need to know about life, including the two different genders, in His written word (the Bible). In Made to Be She sisters Kristen Clark and Bethany Beal stand on that firm foundation as they share insight into how to sort through the noise and confusion to get to the truth of the question of what it really means to be female.

The first, and probably most important, thing I want to say about this book is that it is, indeed, completely biblically grounded. I really appreciate the authors' commitment to the truth, unashamedly taking what will undoubtedly be an unpopular stand about gender, biology, and femininity. I believe this book could be a great resource for Christian women who don't quite know how to respond to today's culture or aren't even sure what they should believe. I do not have any confusion about these matters myself, but I did still gain some valuable insight.

History of the feminist movements over the years is explored, and I found it interesting seeing how it plays a role in our modern culture, even when we don't realize that some of what we think has its roots in feminism. Particularly fascinating to me was the idea that religion can also skew our view of womanhood, for example the way "purity culture" (a big movement in the 90s when I was a teen) gave young women a mission without a heart change or a biblical understanding of why they were keeping themselves pure. The authors challenge their readers to examine their own beliefs and possible feminist attitudes or ideals they may have without even realizing it. 

The Bible is not silent or unclear on gender or gender roles, and Christian women should not be either. I can see this book being read in church groups or other similar settings, even possibly mothers reading it and discussing it with their teenage daughters—though be aware that the authors go into some depth about sex and sexuality, completely within a biblical context. I considered suggesting it to my daughter and discussing it with her as she read, but as she is only 14, by the time I finished reading the book, I knew I'd prefer to wait a few years on that. With that in mind, I do recommend this book to every Christian woman, especially those who are overwhelmed by today's tumultuous, truth-denying culture.

I received a free review copy from the publisher in exchange for my honest unedited feedback.
Profile Image for Bethel Grove.
Author 23 books6 followers
November 19, 2024
In their book Made to Be She, authors Kristen Clark and Bethany Beal dive deep into what it means to be created as a woman in the image of God. They start by addressing the ways in which our views of womanhood have gone wrong, explaining that there are not only pitfalls to believing in feminist womanhood to give you a satisfying identity, but also in religious womanhood that tends to rely on personal works and legalism rather than God’s grace and redemption. Both of these ditches (feminist womanhood and religious womanhood) are examined carefully through the movements that influenced their current state while helping readers see that the only way to find a fulfillment in your identity as a woman is to rely on the truth God reveals about your design through His Word, providing guidance on how to improve your biblical literacy and diving deep into six core traits that God designed into males and females respectively. The fallout of many difference aspects of feminist womanhood are explored, including transgender ideology, the birth control pill, and the normalizing of choosing a career over motherhood. Through it all, you are encouraged to find hope and confidence by reclaiming God’s timeless design so that you can live out fearless femininity.

This book is full of wisdom and inspiration for women of all ages. Kristen and Bethany tackle some difficult topics with clarity and bring biblical truths to areas that are often hidden beneath ideas that rely on feelings and human reasoning. They are honest about the aspects of womanhood and their faith that they got wrong so they can help others get it right. No matter where your views of womanhood are, you will hopefully find a fresh and must-needed perspective that will ground your identity in the truth of God’s Word. It’s a must-read for women who desire to find their identity as a redeemed daughter of the King of Kings.
3 reviews
May 25, 2025
I loved this book! Kristen and Bethany managed to share biblical truth in a bold, personal, loving and gospel-centered way while getting vulnerable and real with sharing personal stories. Wether you are new to faith and want to know how you can live as a woman of God or you’ve been a believer for decades and want to deepen your understanding of biblical womanhood, this book will be a blessing fot you!
236 reviews10 followers
December 14, 2025
Apparently, one woman single-handedly invented Feminism and then chose Cosmopolitan to spread it ☠️ and eugenics is only bad when leftists do it, Focus on The Family's connections to eugenicists are a-okay. Being a man is about being masculine and a leader, and femininity is being feminine 💩 Such a dull and stupid book.
4 reviews
November 22, 2025
I loved this book. A must read for christian women to find out where we do not root our female identity in christ. However if you are not a believer and do not even think it is possible, that God is your creator most of the points made will probably not make sense to you.
1 review
December 6, 2024
Excellent book

Truly inspirational and great guidance in how to live out biblical woman in 2024!

Highly recommend as well as all the other books by the authors.
Profile Image for Mk Call.
1 review
August 27, 2025
Honestly a great book, certain quotes could definitely be twisted but the overall big picture was amazingly informative
198 reviews
October 26, 2025
I like the fact that Bethany talked about being single in this book for so many years and I love her and about them playing basketball and I love the chapter about birth control and motherhood
Profile Image for Orem.
12 reviews18 followers
Read
October 3, 2025
I can forgive the insertanyphobia here, but I draw the line at still using "I (Bethany)" like.... girls get a better ghostwriter!!
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