Over a Barrel and Down a Peg

by Vera Valentine

When f*ckboy Tucker attempts to talk his new dating app girlfriend into doing something she's not keen on, the tables are about to turn on the pain-in-the-ass in a BIG way. Really, he ought to know better than to mutter poorly-worded wishes out loud on Saint Patrick's Day, particularly when two pairs of pointed ears are listening nearby. He's about to learn revenge is a dish best served over a barrel and down a peg, complete with a heaping side of hashbrown casserole.

***

Over a Barrel and Down a Peg is an MMF paranormal(ish) romance short story between two secretly-otherworldly creatures and one hapless human with some pretty vile idealogies rattling around in his brain. If you’re upset by hard right talking points and biases, please know that our MC has guzzled that particular unbranded colorful drink and starts the story entirely unrepentant and entitled. He’s not exactly “redeemed” by the end, but canonically he’s on his way there by the end with a little “help” from his new leprechaun friends.

Please This story contains a character with problematic ideologies (e.g. rampant misogyny, poor-bashing, leftist/liberal-bashing, homophobia, etc), sorta-dub-con (more self-delusion, magic doesn’t play a role in it!), bi awakening, pegging, decaf coffee, humiliation, cuckolding, cleanup on aisle FMC after said cuckolding, numerous OSHA and food safety violations, food used during spicytime (don’t worry nothing’s wasted), BDSM-esque power exchange/roles, physical coercion (one male pushing, holding, and shoving the other male around), and name calling. As always, if you have any questions or concerns about story content, you’re more than welcome to contact me (Vera Valentine) on social media for clari!cation. Your comfort is way more important to me than page reads!

Genres: Paranormal Romance, Novella, LGBT, Erotica, Romance, Smut, Short Stories

47 pages, Kindle Edition

Published March 4, 2024

Reviews

[Lori R. · Rating 4 out of 5]

short and fun and filthy

Of all days for me to have eaten hash-browns for breakfast. LOL

This book was recommended to me by one of my book besties - she’d never steer me wrong. All I can say is, it was filthy and magically delicious and I’m glad I read it. Because Vera Valentine.

[BigAzzReads · Rating 5 out of 5]

I admit that I’m biased. Im probably going to give 5 stars to anything that Vera Valentine writes because the creativity is just so out there that I have to admire it.

If you’re looking for a serious read? Don’t bother with this one. If you’re looking for some fun? Something that makes you go WTF? Read it. I’m hungry for hash browns now 😂

[Alix · Rating 4 out of 5]

Uh what the fuck did I just read

[Monica · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have some...feelings...about the MMC Tucker. He would have instantly made my "no fuck" list, even if he would eventually indulge my pegging fantasy. Lots of his internal dialog made me cringe, but plenty of it made me laugh too. Ben Shapiro reacting to WAP vibes, if you get my drift. Turns out that his girlfriend Dawna has a plan for him that makes putting up with his BS the last couple months worthwhile. Tucker gets Dawna's interpretation of what he wished for, which turns out to be what he actually wanted anyway. Dawna and her actual boyfriend find that their instincts about him were right and they put Tucker in his place.

Oh yeah, Dawna and Robin are leprechauns with golden fluids. They have some magic, but it doesn't play a big role here. It doesn't take magic to convince Tucker to give in to his own fantasies. Overall a good read, though you may never look at hashbrowns the same way again.

[T Rojo · Rating 4 out of 5]

VERA! Omg wth lololol

[Victoria Bush · Rating 5 out of 5]

Vera Valentine. YES. Chef’s kiss. I never thought I would enjoy leprechauns like that, but for some reason, it reminded me of Jennifer Aniston in Office Space. Can’t beat that.

[Taylor Dawicke · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love Vera Valentine! This book was hilarious and I was so happy seeing stupid, selfish Tucker get what he had coming.

[Courtney]

Not the Cracker Barrel hashbrown casserole

[tysephine · Rating 3 out of 5]

Glad I read this *after* I went to Cracker Barrel on Sunday and not before.

[Abby · Rating 1 out of 5]

why did they have to get the hash browns involved :(

[Ania · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 ⭐️
3.75/5 🌶

WOW. What can I say about this story except, glorious. The entire time I was reading this I was curling my toes. You just gotta read it.

[christy - pr0bablyreadingsmut · Rating 5 out of 5]

nothing like seeing a strong “alpha” male get turned into a slutty lil subby boy.

five stars

[Maria Louisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

wtf but like in a good way??? I honestly don’t know and I’m concerned about myself

[Gnome Patronus · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Mm. We really are magically delicious, Bella. He’s a lucky little plaything”

You know that TikTok, the one with a cute Meow and then a deep voice “I told you, we need more glitter!”

That is this book.

Why did I wait so long to read this little Novella. If you like the short smut but non-con or dub-con is a no go for you. Well, this book is a green flag for you. With the amount of smut I was pleasantly surprised to see the amount of consent that was layered in.
I am a dark romance girl, so these are not triggers for me, but it is hard to find good books to recommend to my friends who are not dark. I laughed, my brows were raised and I LOVED the “alpha male”…I am still laughing at that one as I write this (a day after I finished reading)

[Biblio · Rating 5 out of 5]

WOO SHE A PEGGA. Loved this country fresh leprechaun tale. Vera never misses. Tucker is a "alpha" male with a baddd attitude (and personality let's be real) and gets more than he asked for with his st. paddy's day wish, plus some.... There's peg.. games, old timey photos and objects, gold fluids, misuse of hashbrown casserole, leprechauns and so much more. Buckle up and strap o... in.

[Iyabo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read this for St Patrick’s Day because y’all know I love a holiday themed story. First of all, I was reading the CW and was FLABBERGASTED at how Vera could fit SO MUCH in 40 pages. I knew I’d have my work cut out for me. It was quite literally over a barrel and down a peg and it was glorious. Gold??? Magically delicious??? Vera really thinks of everything. The only thing that was missing was a rainbow. Nothing will ever beat Thanksgiving or the 4th of July dragons but I quite enjoyed my evil smutty Leprechauns. Cheers.

[Alex · Rating 5 out of 5]

An alphahole gets dicked down by two leprechauns in this parody novella.

Well. This was a ride. From the inner monologue of our MAGA hero, to eating his cum coated hashbrowns, to leprechauns coming gold, I feel like this entry into Vera’s catalogue was meant for laughs. And I did laugh. Vera is unhinged as usual and I am here for it.

Fast burn with food play, strap, and spit-roast.

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Spice: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️
POV: Solo 1st

[Kelli Santistevan · Rating 1 out of 5]

Over a Barrel and Down a Peg is an MMF paranormal(ish) romance short story between two secretly-otherworldly creatures and one hapless human with some pretty vile idealogies rattling around in his brain.

I read this book on Kindle Unlimited. I didn’t really like it. It didn’t do anything for me and I thought the food play during the sex scenes that involved the hash-browns was gross. I like hash-browns but I won’t be eating hash-browns for a while.

[Hades · Rating 4 out of 5]

another masterpiece from Ms. Valentine. What she can do in 45 pages, other authors waste 300 pages attempting to do.

the characters: well-thought out. complex. not all likable.

the plot: plotting. a full 3 act arc + spice. a resolution that isn’t entirely expected.

the spice: hotter & wetter than a sauna. (with a surprising amount of breakfast food involved)

a masterclass in succinct & entertaining writing. if this premise isn’t for you, i highly suggest any of her books.

[ladybreww · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cracker Barrel romance?

Well I'll be damned. That was interesting. At first I was concerned, but I trusted the process and Vera did not do me dirty. They sure taught him a lesson. A lesson it seems he quite enjoyed. This is quite dirty. 5 out of 5 on the spice scale. Just don't think about the breakfast foods too much.

[Bookish Babe Jenn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stunned.. LOL

If you could see my face post-read right now.. LOL!! Like.. wtf did I just read?! Hahaha! Vera has done it again with an absolutely FILTHY book about two very naughty leprechauns and the jerky guy they make their play-thing on St. Patrick's Day!! I loved it.. another short, dirty, holiday-themed erotica to add to the bookshelf!

[Wandering Seal · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been thinking a while on how to rate this - I try to meet a book where its at and in terms of restaurant parody smut I don't think I could in good conscience give this less than 5 stars. It achieves all its goals. The writing is solid. The fluids are golden.

I will never think of hash browns the same way again.

[Lynn_G · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious and deliciously naughty. Leprechauns and a b!-cur!ous bottom in serious denial, all set in a giant highway-adjacent chain restaurant that closely resembles the ubiquitous classic down to the gold starred brown aprons and fireside checkers tables. A pegging good time is had by all, after a fashion.

[Amriel (Harli) Bang · Rating 5 out of 5]

Vera hasn't done me wrong yet 🥰🥰

I loved most everything about this from the spice to the pegging. (That decaf coffee was scarey though😩😩)

I loved it entirely and hope to see more of Robin.

Just a fun little spicy novella. 💗💗

[Barbara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Magically delicious!

Ah Vera, you never disappoint. A quick, dirty fling never sounded so good. Why am I hungry for well stuffed hashbrowns? The mystery continues. Highly recommend!

[Miranda Jo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Luck be with you

It's definitely magically delicious! A short and highly entertaining read about leprechauns, pegging and food play. Highly recommend for a quick and funny spicy story.

[Maggie Forte · Rating 2 out of 5]

This one didn't do it for me... it felt more mean-spirited than the others I've read by this author.

I don't really know how to describe the vibe other than it felt like a hate-fuck between the author and your average reddit chud.

[Yara flores · Rating 1 out of 5]

Definitivamente no es para mi

[APB · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very fun read.

[Samantha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Insane, unhinged, dirty and hilarious. Peak Vera. Check TWs before reading, just in case.