My Husband's a Woman Now: A Shared Journey of Transition and Love

by Leslie Hilburn Fabian

Nothing is more certain in life than change, and this change is bigger than most. In 2009, Leslie Fabian's husband, David-an orthopedic surgeon who'd been privately cross-dressing for most of his life-realized that brief forays into the world as Deborah would never be enough. This came as no surprise to Leslie. For two decades, cross-dressing had been a part of their lives; but she had witnessed her spouse's devastation each time he returned to his male persona. Once David finally realized he was "more than just a cross-dresser," Leslie encouraged him to become Deborah. My Husband's a Woman Now is the personal, heartfelt tale of a wife supporting her mate's transition to female, while grieving the loss of her male partner. It's a love story, abounding with tales of the Fabians' challenges, changes, and ultimate triumph over the radical upheaval of their lives...by their own choice. This story can and will inspire you, whether you're transgender, gay, straight-or anything in-between!

Genres: Nonfiction

238 pages, Paperback

First published February 26, 2014

Reviews

[Ann Evans]

If you ever wondered what it would be like if your husband transitioned to womanhood, this is an excellent book to read. It is a peek into a human experience that most people don't ever go through, but should know about.

It is a simply told tale featuring two good people dealing with a situation for which they have few role models or literary characters and little medical advice to guide them. They depend on their sense of right and wrong, good and bad. The deeper they get into Deborah's transition, the more company and support they find they have. In that sense, the book is uplifting—folks are generally willing to go along with another person's choices, with one caveat...the closer these folks are, the harder it is for them to accept a change of gender.

Watching these two good people make their way through this experience will hone your compassion, inform your mind, and strengthen your heart.

[Alyssabeth Jansen]

Having gone through the hardships of having a spouse transition I commend Leslie for writing her story. I especially enjoyed the last portion of the book that was focused on her journal entries from the year post-transition. Those felt the most relevant to me and made me feel as if I am not alone in my experiences when my partner began their transition.
I struggled with the first half of the book because of the way the author skipped around the timeline. I had trouble following where we were in her life. I also felt extreme discomfort surrounding the use of her spouse's former name and pronouns as I have learned that is a big no-no. Whether that was the case when this was written remains to be seen, but it really took me out of her story and made me feel extremely uncomfortable.

[Jim Thibeault]

A unique look on transgenderism

Fabian gives a unique perspective on transitioning that's often overlooked. By focusing on her views on her spouse's transition, as well as her own "transitioning" via acceptance, Fabian creates a narrative that's engrossing. Incredibly open and honest, Fabian does not hold back talking about the ups and downs about her spouse's transition. Highly recommended for those interested in reading literature on transgenderism.

[Francis X DuFour]

Transition Seen from the Other Side

An illuminating account of the trials and tribulations of a woman whose husband became a woman. Having friends who have transitioned, the book presents what it’s like to be on the other side of m-to-f transition. Very illuminating and thought provoking, I highly recommend this book. I learned a lot about the emotional reactions of the wife of a transgender.

[Bruce M]

Wonderfully written and right on the mark.

Read the book in almost one sitting. If you are trans, or the partner of one this is a must read. Walks you through the ups and downs of the psychological parts of the relationship. One of my favorite books in a long time.

[Alisha Roach]

I'm in a situation very similar to the author's. This book was so very helpful. I identified with much of what she went through. I'd recommend it to anyone who's partner/spouse is transitioning.

[Joanne]

I met Leslie at a Writers' Club and then, again at an author talk, on Pine Island Florida. We got talking, she described her book (really a love story), and I had to buy it. It's fascinating, brave, sensitive and well written. Transgender issues are in the news and this book helps us understand the subject from the non-trans partner's view. I appreciate Leslie's candor.

[Susan Conboy]

A true love story. Gut wrenching at times.
We were fortunate to have an opportunity to meet both of them at our library yesterday. They shared their story, and gave us an opportunity to ask questions. very informative! Both were very engaging. A true treat.

[Julia]

A lovely and compassionate true story of honesty to breakthrough change.

[A. Powers]

Amazing book! I absolutely loved it!

Officially read and reviewed for OnlineBookClub.org: http://forums.onlinebookclub.org/view...