This review is based on an incomplete reading of Intertwine. I don't really like what I've read so far, so I'm not sure if I'll bother finishing it. But in the meantime, enjoy my thoughts so far...
I was really, really banking on loving Intertwine. I haven't read a good time-travel romance novel in ages, so I was really hankering for one as I scoured the internet, trying to find a worthy recommendation. I finally discovered Intertwine in the comments section of a list I found floating around, "11 Books to Read If You Love Outlander." I checked it out on Goodreads, it seemed like something I'd like (Time travel to Regency England? The Janeite in me was thrilled by that prospect!), so I hastily ordered it from Amazon.
The problems arose as soon as the book arrived. I mean, the cover was pretty, but the quality of the book had "self-published" written all over it. I later learned that Nichole Van owns Fiorenza Publishing. It so figures. A quick perusal on the inside publishing pages also revealed that the cover design and interior design are also copyrighted to Nichole Van. Alright folks, we've got a one-woman show here! Not that I'm saying that all self-published books are inherently bad... it's just that they very often could have used the benefit of an unbiased editor. And did this book ever.
So it starts out with Emme (Pronounced Em? Or Emmy? I was never sure.) finding some old-ass locket at some estate sale with [Insert Wacky Best Friend Who's Into Unconventional Sciences/Spirituality Here]. She then becomes straight-up obsessed with the 200-year-old portrait of the man inside... I mean, certifiably insane. She is literally in love with this portrait. This portrait has LITERALLY wrecked romantic relationships in her life. Her FAMILY knows about how badly she wants to fuck this Locket Man. (Seriously??? Like, maybe I could get behind playing at being in love with an old portrait of a handsome man, but she was so serious about this that she told her family about it!!! That's so bizarre!!! I just can't sympathize with a heroine who's quite so mental right out of the gate.) And the worst part is that Wacky Best Friend totally supports this! She is deadly serious as she encourages Emme to "find her destiny," or some shit, with Locket Man. We're never told just why Wacky Best Friend believes so firmly that Emme will find a way to be with Locket Man, or are given anything resembling a backstory or explanation for her; we're just expected to merely accept the fact that Wacky Best Friend is profoundly addlepated and sincerely believes this shit. Okay, I guess.
So Emme has been horny for Locket Man for, like, years, when she finally decides that it seems mentally healthy to travel to England to discover who Locket Man really is, in a convoluted-but-convenient-for-the-plot effort to "get over him." Meh. Whatever it takes to get this story moving, because it is fucking crawling.
Anyway, what happens next is, some epic lightning storm on May Day (we're led to believe that this day is significant from Wacky Best Friend, and she seems like a credible source to me!) strikes and somehow transports Emme back to the 19th century, where she is discovered by--get this!-A MAN WHO LOOKS JUST LIKE LOCKET MAN! His name is James, and he's the 21st century woman's wet dream version of a Regency gentleman--y'know, the kind who shies away from social norms and expectations of his day. He stumbles across Emme's unconscious body (conveniently, Emme has the tastes of an 80-year-old woman and wears floor-length white nighties to bed) and, being the unconventional sort-of gentleman that he is, takes her back to his manor home. Emme eventually wakes up, but it's discovered that she has amnesia! (Amnesia? Really? The last time I thought amnesia seemed like a realistic plot device I was in the fourth grade reading Megamorphs #1: the Andalite's Gift.)
So now we have amnesiac Emme (who now goes by "Emma," because, why not?) traipsing about Regency England, fucking up social situations by shaking hands with the gentlemen (the horror!) and blathering on about ninjas and zombies. (Fucking shoot me now. This is like juvenile shit I wrote in high school.)
This is pretty much where I gave up. I may or may not subject myself to reading more of this disaster. I'll be sure to update this review if I do!