It’s a shame that Dorothy Allison’s memoir Two or Three Things I Know for Sure will likely never receive the widespread reading it so richly deserves. The slim volume should be required reading. It is raw, filled with emotion which cuts to the bone. Tales of searing pain and loss, loss, even, of what one has never possessed. Ultimately, though, a book of hope, hope springing from the very fact that the book exists.
It is, I suppose, a book meant for other women, but one whose greatest potential lesson might be for men, could they somehow be persuaded to read it. For women, it lends the courage to say “You can’t break me…And you’re never going to touch me again.“ For men, it could show that every action has an effect, that each sexist act, however insignificant they may think it is, diminishes not only women, but men, as well. In a world where boys are raised to believe high school athletes can rape with impunity, it might shed light that the harm done goes far beyond one specific victim, that the damage is, in addition, to society itself. Though Allison never says the words, it might even show that “no” does, in fact, mean no, and that consent clouded by drugs or alcohol is not consent at all.
It’s also a tale of family, of revisited childhood, of learning that things aren’t always what they seem. Of salvation and escape in story. The use of created story to avoid telling the story the world tries to force upon her of life, not just hers, but, as she says, “my mother’s life, my sisters’, uncles’, cousins’, and lost girlfriends’ -- those are the stories that could destroy me, erase me, mock and deny me.” That is what rape is really about, not sex, but power, the male’s way of saying, “You’re nothing. I can do anything I want to you because you don’t matter.” OF forcing women to tell a story of defeat. Allison’s basic message is to expose that for the lie it is.
Again, it is a story filled with pain, rendered all the more stark by Allison's down-to-earth, conversational prose. In the end, though, a sense of uplift prevails, the feeling that woman have the potential to triumph over whatever adversity comes their way.