The Confession

by James E. McGreevey

In August 2004, Governor James E. McGreevey of New Jersey made history when he stepped before microphones, declared "My truth is that I am a gay American," and announced his resignation. The story made international headlines—but what led to that moment was a human and political drama more complex and fascinating than anyone knew. Now, in this extraordinarily candid memoir, McGreevey shares his story of a life of ambition, moral compromise, and redemption. From childhood, McGreevey lived a kind of idealized American life. The son of working-class Irish Catholic parents, named for an uncle who died at Iwo Jima, he strove to exceed expectations in everything he did, meeting each new challenge as though his "future rode on every move." As a young man he was tempted by the priesthood, yet it was another calling—politics—that he found irresistible. Plunging early into the dangerous waters of New Jersey politics, he won three elections by the age of thirty-six, and soon thereafter nearly toppled the state's popular governor, Christie Todd Whitman, in a photo-finish election. Four years later, he won the governorship by a landslide. Throughout his adult life, however, Jim McGreevey had been forced to suppress a fundamental truth about that he was gay. He knew at once that the only clear path to his dreams was to live a straight life, and so he split in two, accepting the traditional role of family man while denying his deepest emotions. And he discovered, to his surprise, that becoming a political player demanded ethical shortcuts that became as corrosive as living in the closet. In the cutthroat culture of political bosses, backroom deals, and the insidious practice known as "pay-to-play," he writes, "political compromises came easy to me because I'd learned how to keep a part of myself innocent of them." His policy triumphs as governor were tempered by scandal, as the transgressions of his staff came back to haunt him. Yet only when a former lover threatened to expose him did he finally confront his divided soul, and find the authentic self that had always eluded him. More than a coming-out memoir, The Confession is the story of one man's quest to repair the rift between his public and private selves, at a time in our culture when the personal and political have become tangled like frayed electric cables. Teeming with larger-than-life characters, written with honesty, grace, and rare insight into what it means to negotiate the minefields of American public life, it may be among the most honest political memoirs ever written.

Genres: Nonfiction, Biography, Memoir, Politics, LGBT, Autobiography

384 pages, Paperback

First published September 19, 2006

About the author

James Edward "Jim" McGreevey is an American Democratic politician. He served as the 52nd Governor of New Jersey from January 15, 2002, until November 15, 2004, when he left office three months after admitting that he had had an extramarital affair with a male employee. Upon publicly revealing his homosexuality on August 12, 2004, McGreevey became the first and, to date, the only openly gay state governor in United States history.

Reviews

[Carrie Solinger · Rating 1 out of 5]

I saw an episode of "Who the Bleep Did I Marry?" involving the scandal involving New Jersey's 51st Governor, Jim McGreevey. As the "wronged" spouse, Dina Matos McGreevey provided her perspective on how she discovered, and how she reacted, when her husband turned out to be something completed different than what her portrayed to the world and her.

I was intrigued. I remotely remember this scandal when it became national and international headlines for the same reasons that all scandals become salacious fodder eager audiences: politics, power, greed, sex, and money. New Jersey's 51st Governor, James E. McGreevey, announced his decision not run for reelection, his choice to resign his post within 3 months on November 15, oh, and that he was and always has been "a gay American."

So, I went straight to my public library and reserved Jim McGreevey's memoir, "The Confession," and this book, Dina Matos McGreevey's "Silent Partner: A Memoir of My Marriage." I chose to read them in the order they were published. So, I read Jim McGreevey's book first.

I remember seeing the televised announcement, and it did briefly catch my attention. This was more due to the fact that I lived in SF and have many LGBT friends, so interest in this topic was peaked in my circle of friends. Other than a few passing conversations, the topic drifted under the radar.

Now, finally, to the review:
I really wanted to like this book. I really wanted to be moved by the difficulties this man faced his entire life as he struggled with his inner demons before being forced out-of-the-closet. Despite my personal opinions, with regards to McGreevey's own role in putting himself in this position, I still do not believe anyone should feel forced to either payoff blackmail threats or announce their sexual orientation.

Giving some credit to McGreevey, he did address the duality of his life and even goes on to express how terrible he feels for the pain he caused, blah, blah, blah. Still, the overall impression I garner from this book is that is first and foremost self-serving. While McGreevey provides "explanations" for his action, they often come off as excuses and overly defensive justifications. He is not hesitant, in the least to pat himself on the back for his many hard fought and won accomplishments; or attach names to details of New Jersey's corrupt politics and politicians.

Overall, I think this book was less of a "confession," and more of way to justify his dubious actions. Even when McGreevey accepts responsibility for his actions, he is quick to blame the socio-culutural and political environments as forcing his hand and choices. McGreevey props himself up with a method common among high school bullies; he lauds his feats while demeaning his "enemies."

This book lacked authenticity and level of maturity and insight that makes this a disappointing read for any audience.

[Chepita · Rating 4 out of 5]

After reading this book I felt sadness for him and glad that he finally found the courage to be himself. The years he had to live a lie and hide his sexual orientation were sad and painful. It taught me that sometimes as parents we automatically assume our children are going to like/love the opposite sex, but we don't know. I learned how to better approach the subject of homosexuallity and sex in general with my children. I don't wish the pain and suffering he felt growing up on anyone. It's a very graphic portrayal of politics and the behind the scenes of what America does not see of our politicians. Especially when they have something to hide. It always manages to come out.

[Vincent Solomeno · Rating 4 out of 5]

Former New Jersey Governor James McGreevey's "The Confession" shares the one time rising star's tortured struggle with his sexuality. A fast read, Mr. McGreevey effectively paints a picture of New Jersey's byzantine political scene at the turn of the twenty-first century. In a way, the memoir serves as a "mea culpa" to all those he deceived during the course of his career. Recommended reading.

[Don · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a fascinating look at the rise and fall of one of the most complex political figures of the early 2000s. I ended with a much better understanding of the life and motivations of Governor McGreevy than when I began.

[Jeffrey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thought it was an honest from the heart story. Was proud to see how he outed himself to the public and took responsibility. It was a sad day to see him resign as governor when it shouldn't have made any difference in his professional duties. Voted for him in the election!

[Louise · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a personal narrative and a description of New Jersey politics. It's sad that the circumstances of McGreevey's life forced this resignation, because the list of his achievements (early childhood education, insurance reform, tax redistribution, land conservation, and in the end, campaign finance reform) shows that he provided good governance within the realm of the possible.

McGreevey gives insight into the life of a statewide political leader. None of your life, nor that of your spouse, is yours. Day and night you're shaking hands and talking about water and potholes. I have been to a few rubber chicken dinners but have no idea what it is like to enjoy them as Jim McGreevey did. Despite a $100K+ income, the cost of appearances means he had almost no savings, but was accused of profiting from his office anyway.

He also gives insight into how one becomes a governor in NJ. He tells how the north and south Democratic organizations pick their statewide candidates and how key leaders need to be visited and convinced. He explains the code words that keep candidates from crossing legal lines when their staffs line up contributions. He shows how the Governor's office is not a safe pinnacle. Knives come at you from everywhere including the US Justice Department where the prosecutor uses his office as a tool to damage McGreevey's reputation to clear the way for his own run for office.

So, why did McGreevey (or anyone for that matter) choose such a stressful career? He gives insight into his childhood, his coming of age, his need for approval. He writes about the need to integrate the self he created with the natural person who was penned up inside.

I was one of the many people who at one time shook his hand. He impressed me a super clean highly disciplined person who had a secret.

[Roxanne Reyes · Rating 4 out of 5]

An honest and revealing look at the political games played by all parties involved. So glad that ex-governor McGreevey prior to resigning his term of office signed an Executive Order putting an end to the pay to play system, prohibiting donors from receiving significant state contracts if they had given money to a winning gubernatorial candidate, the ruling state party or the ruling county party boss within 18 months of the contract disbursement. Talk about sweeping campaign finance reform! The story also addresses the personal torment faced by James McGreevey prior to becoming the Governor of New Jersey. I thought it was nicely written, surprised at how candid he was especially during his sexual escapades at parks and other public places. I think the story was more than a coming out memoir, describing in detail the political system, dirty deals behind closed doors, and his journey to redemption and forgiveness. Definitely recommended!

[Iris Robinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really interesting! I vaguely remember McGreevey's on-air confession, wayyyy before equality became a mainstream issue. It was enlightening to listen to his story, written in 2006, 7 years later. It shows you how far society has come in terms of LGBT rights and our views on it. Back in 2004, this was a BIG deal. A confession of an affair is of course still a big deal, but now there are many politicians who were openly gay when elected.

I felt more sympathy for McGreevey concerning his particular situation. The secret of his sexuality didn't justify his affair, but it would have been different if he would have been with another woman.

The details of the political aspect was a little mundane to me, but I understand that it was pertinent to the story.

[AuthorsOnTourLive! · Rating 5 out of 5]

In August 2004, New Jersey Governor James McGreevey made history when he stepped before microphones and declared, "My truth is that I am a gay American," and announced his resignation. The story made international headlines - but what led to that moment was a human and political drama more complex and fascinating than anyone knew. Now, in this extraordinarily candid memoir, McGreevey shares his story of a life of ambition, moral compromise and redemption.

We met James McGreevey when he visited the Tattered Cover Bookstore in Denver. You can listen to him talk about The Confession here:
http://www.authorsontourlive.com/?p=77

[Edgar · Rating 3 out of 5]

Comes. Full. Circle.

I started reading this biographic book back in November on and off, and finally, I've reached to the point of understanding on James McGreevey's plight this summer.

It's a testament to any individual facing obstacles in life compounded with hiding one's own true self. As a reader, you're placed in a sympathetic and less judgmental mindset. But we are all human and some of us tend to judge; I do. Fair enough.

Overall, it's an honest and poignant story given in a selective perspective of one's own life journey. It will be telling to see what he's up to these days if his life really comes full circle from his own past admission.

[Larry · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was not expecting to like this book and ended up being pleasantly surprised by it.The first part is very politically and religiously involved. He was a strong Catholic and really was politically driven.He talks about both his marriages,his children,his parents,his annonomous sex adventures,crushes,unrequited loves,his affair with golen,his road to recovery and search for happiness. Well written and I felt very honest.

[Hillary · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read his ex-wife's book, and thought I'd read his to get a balanced picture of what happened. Overall I thought the book was good. Gave a lot of the "backstory" into New Jersey politics, which was interesting. Someone else's review had said there weren't as many life lessons as they had hoped, and I would agree with that comment. That said, I am glad he is now living his own truth and hope he is enjoying life to its fullest.

[Therese · Rating 2 out of 5]

He remembers things differently than his wife did in her book. And, illumination, he barely mentions her in this book, as if she was furniture. Though he never really says anything bad about her.

I feel for him, how hard it was to choke back his real self his whole life, how scared he was. But he did SO much damage to other people, unneeded, selfish damage.


Yeah, he's still a dick. But now he's kind of a sad, pitiful dick.

[Phil Williams · Rating 3 out of 5]

There is a great deal of good explanation of pay-for-play politics and the book goes into great detail of what campaining is like for a politician in todays America. I had a hard time liking McGreevey though because of his self loathing which is because of his Catholic upbringing. Nothing spreads hate like religion and if he had of been raised in a less religious household he wouldn't have wasted 48 years learing to like himself.

[Pablo · Rating 4 out of 5]

With breathtaking honesty and detail, McGreevey tells a story that goes well beyond what the reader might at first expect. Reading his memoir has left me not only perplexed at an incredibly interesting, public coming out story but has also taught me much about the fascinating inside life of state politics.

[Yak · Rating 2 out of 5]

Interesting both from the perspective of politics at the state level, and of course McGreevey's struggles with himself as a devout Catholic and closeted gay man. Not worth reading again, but it should be interesting to New jersey residents and gays.

[Kevin · Rating 4 out of 5]

The former governor of New Jersey and his estrange wife are currently battling our their divorce in court. This is an insightful telling of how the desire to be someone we aren't causes many problems within our own and the lives of others.

[Drianne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very interesting read, although the apologetics for what were ultimately his own choices are a bit wearying. Still, a fascinating look at what ambition and fear can do to an otherwise decent person. Especially recommended for those interested in NJ politics.

[Cbernard3 · Rating 5 out of 5]

The political behind-the-scenes was vividly portrayed in this autobiography. I found myself cheering for Jim McGreevy when he was able to settle down with a husband. I hope he still keeps in tabs with the New Jersey political machine.

[Samantha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very personal & revealing.

[Matthew · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of information on campaigning and what its like to hold a powerful position as a closeted gay man. Not as many "life lessons" as I would have wanted out of a book like this, but still good.

[Jill deResendes · Rating 3 out of 5]

If you read Silent Partner then you must read his side.

[Florence Buchholz · Rating 3 out of 5]

What a pity that this man had to disguise his true nature in order to achieve the political career that he strived for.

[Keith · Rating 2 out of 5]

Definitely can relate to the storyline (DUH!), but found much of the "filler" regarding politics sooooo boring!

[Jean · Rating 5 out of 5]

True story of the former NJ Governor coming out as a gay man. Very interesting.

[C.J. Edmunds · Rating 5 out of 5]

Late perhaps as it may, this is how people are when they decide to live their life based on Truth.

Live it so. Because....IT gets Better!

[Bridget · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was an interesting book, but not enough personal anecdotes in it. Too professionally written, we want to see more emotion. Flat and boring at some points.

[Elaine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found Jim McGreevey inspiring and brave.

[Deborah Dietzler]

Listened to it on audio.