You actually cannot begin to imagine how much I hate Jolene. I gave this book 2 stars* because I did really like the concept of being given access to everyone's communications at work, quite a funny and interesting plot-I wanted to know everyone's little work secrets! But that's literally the only good part about this book. I'd give it negative 9275438 stars for everything else. I wrote a whole essay on my notes app as I was reading this book just to air my grievances (something I have never done for any other book, ever!!), but I will shorten things up here.
First and foremost, I hate Jolene. She is a terrible person in every single way. You cannot convince me she has a kind bone in her body. Any nice thing she did in the book was out of the ulterior motive of not getting fired. This is evident from how she treated her young neighbor.
Anyway, Jolene couldn’t make a good decision if her life depended on it. Every single opportunity she has to be a normal person, she makes a sharp left turn into some fuckery. I wanted to scream into her ear to grow up and get a life! Anxiety is not an excuse to be a piece of shit! Jolene is so, so tactless. A coworker requests donations for his mother who is dying of cancer, and she responds in SUCH a crass and careless manner. It doesn't matter if you're dirt poor and can't afford to donate any money, you can still respond with kindness. She is such a self-centered and tactless loser who was seemingly never taught manners (high possibility, judging by the fact that her mom has no boundaries or concern for basic decorum. Apple doesn't fall far blah blah) or just chose to ignore them. I mean sorry, you’re 33! It's time to grow up!!!! Every fucking sentence that comes out of her mouth is MEAN and she does nothing to fix it. She just constantly makes excuses for herself presumably to shirk accountability? She says ridiculous things like “I'm such a problem! I shouldn’t ever speak!” instead of just...owning up to her mistakes. Like yeah, you should absolutely shut up forever, but you should also just go to therapy! I acknowledge that she does eventually go to therapy, but it's about 15 years too late.
I genuinely feel like even sociopaths have better emotional function than Jolene. She is so deeply inconsiderate, emotionally stunted, and immature. And she seems to know it?? She makes comments about it constantly? Like she's soooo self pitying that I actually just started to agree with her. “I’m such a bad friend” “I don’t deserve an answer” “I’m not a good person” YAH! AGREED! Have you considered putting in even an ounce of effort to fix that about yourself? No? Just going to wallow and drink instead? She just does not know how to take accountability and cannot articulate even the most basic fucking feelings. She doesn't even consider the consequences of letting her mom and Armin's family book venues and food!! She just lets it happen! You're telling me you can't even find an excuse to get your mom to postpone things a bit? Even after Armin asked you to help him manage the parents?? They are wasting their money on non-refundable deposits?? You careless buffoon!!
Also, she is so fucking mean to a CHILD! A kid who's being raised by a pretty neglectful single mother! She knows Miley wants to talk to people and make friends and be loved and liked, but Jolene never ever tries to be remotely nice to her. God forbid you invite this girl into your home or speak to her with decency and kindness. God forbid you ask her some questions about herself or show any interest! We get it, you’re poor, but apparently so is Miley and her mom if they're living in the same building and there's TWO mouths to feed with one salary?? If you can afford all that liquor then you can spare some change to do something to cheer up this poor kid. I know it's not her responsibility but she's not even sort of nice to Miley. In fact, she's so rude! The same way she's rude to everyone! And then she has the audacity to be mean and then say "this is how it really is" (to herself, of course, she would never dare take an ounce of responsibility for her horrendous behavior). You're trying to teach her a lesson that the world is horrible by being horrible to her? Are you quite all right? (She's not!!!!!)
I cannot believe, cannot even remotely fathom that Cliff liked her! From the start! She is so awful I cannot imagine liking any part of her. If you like someone THAT awful, inconsiderate, snarky, and duplicitous, then you need some help!! Maybe they belong together after all.
And also, even after being found out for spying on everyone and manipulating them, she’s still unable to humble herself!!! She says things like “I’m the shittiest friend” to herself, but never goes out of her way to express that to the people she's hurt along the way?? If you know you're a god awful excuse for a person, why don’t you improve? Why don't you apologize!!! Why aren't you ashamed!!! Why are OTHER people trying to make YOU feel better! Why is Cliff at your door telling you that you deserve good things! You don't!!!!! Why does Jolene get SO much grace while giving none of it back to anyone in return?
My feelings about Jolene's awful behavior are also triggered by the fact that we don’t learn anything significant about Ellie! In essence, she’s just a little filler character to move this insipid main character's story along. I have NO connection to Ellie and therefore don’t really give a shit that she died?? We learn that she was bullied (or they both were? but for what?? what's the backstory? where's the emotion behind it all? how were they even wronged? I mean Jolene crashed a party and dragged Ellie along (after lying to her) am I supposed to feel bad for her??). Honestly it seems like Jolene was fake, inconsiderate, and manipulative even back then. We learn nothing of significance about their actual friendship and apparent love that Jolene and Ellie shared, so I cannot understand why Jolene's whole life is sooo fucked up from Ellie’s death when it wasn't even her fault!!! I understand being sad and feeling traumatized but why are those emotions manifesting into being the worst person alive?? She makes her friend's death all about herself because some random bully made up some rumors that she killed her friend? She knows she didn't (because she explains as much to Caitlin), the news didn't report it as such, she didn't get arrested...?? I don't understand why it ruined her family's life soooo bad when there's no mention of Ellie's family blaming her or anyone else, really. It seems like her friend died, Jolene was nearby when it happened, her whole life somehow turned upside down as a result (though there is no actual explanation or evidence to suggest why), and now she's a deeply insecure and ill-mannered person who has a mental breakdown if someone even remotely suggests that she's weird (she literally falls apart, like it's sooo haunting and detrimental for her to hear that about herself, but we never find out why. Like sure it sucks to have someone call you that, but to be fair, you ARE a gigantic weirdo. Maybe work on that). There's just some rumors made up by a kid but you're telling me an entire town is going along with this story when there was never any truth to it? Why did her family have to leave town I mean this is so ridiculous!!! Generational losers! Get a backbone! (Also, if your mom lost all her friends bc of this, why aren't you a bit nicer to her lmao like what the fuck is wrong with you). I get the feeling Jolene was always a self-centered asshole which is why she lives in a perpetual sob story. Her friend's death cannot have made her a bad person because that literally does not make any sense.
And finally! You're telling me that Jolene becomes a YOUTH COUNSELOR? The same Jolene who lacks critical thinking skills, empathy, and common sense? That Jolene? Because THAT Jolene is such a piece of shit that she certainly shouldn’t be counseling anyone. What's she going to teach them? Here's a step-by-step guide on how to avoid accountability, shirk responsibility, and become the most selfish versions of yourself? She used the death of her friend as a crutch to be a deeply unpleasant person, she manipulated all of her coworkers to keep a job she hated, and did not even bother to apologize to the people who were affected by her selfish scheme. She is just such an absolutely terrible person but everyone in her life is still so nice to her and somehow understanding of her atrocious personality.
Anyway, I hate Jolene so much. I've never experienced such an insufferable character who has almost zero redeeming qualities. I know they try to make her out to be a bit of a selfless hero with trying to help Caitlin escape her toxic boyfriend (slash Jolene's former bully so like, is there an ulterior motive here?), but it just does not stick. I find it so deeply unbelievable that while she's losing her job, she's MORE focused on Caitlin's wellbeing. There's no character development to suggest she'd go this far for a coworker (who's a pretty shitty person too) that she absolutely despises when she does not even have this much consideration for Armin, Rhonda, or Cliff! The people who were genuinely kind to her! She seems to just continue to suck all the way to the end of the book. I do not wish for anything to find her well.
*After thinking about it, I'm changing my rating to 1 star. I really hate Jolene and I do not like this book.