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Fen
An indecent proposal leads to a future neither guy expected.
Fen is broken but does his best to hide the cracks. His life-changing condition might have stolen his first love—ballet, but he’s kind to old ladies, good at his job, and his mum loves him, even if his famous father refuses to acknowledge he exists.
Ripley’s a top flight barrister who’s used to winning. Mostly by fair means, occasionally not. He’s horrified when he learns his manipulative mother has sent family possessions to an auction house. On his way to retrieve them, he encounters Fen.
Cold, rain-soaked and hungry, struggling with his crutch and auction acquisitions, Fen just wants to get home. What he doesn’t want is to be drenched by a car and minutes later, confronted by the bad-tempered driver demanding he hand over his purchases. Hell no!
Ripley gets back his belongings but finds he wants more. Blue-eyed Fen has sparked something to life. Even as his barrister’s brain screams at him to be careful, he makes Fen an outrageous offer. Sleep with me for money. Fen should say no. Yet as he weighs his options, he realises turning Ripley down could be the biggest regret of his life.
In a tale where the pieces don’t always fit, can two imperfect men mend what’s broken in each other?
Warning
Main character with a life-limiting illness. Suicide of a character before story starts. Brief mention of rape and suicide of a man not in the story.
Fen is broken but does his best to hide the cracks. His life-changing condition might have stolen his first love—ballet, but he’s kind to old ladies, good at his job, and his mum loves him, even if his famous father refuses to acknowledge he exists.
Ripley’s a top flight barrister who’s used to winning. Mostly by fair means, occasionally not. He’s horrified when he learns his manipulative mother has sent family possessions to an auction house. On his way to retrieve them, he encounters Fen.
Cold, rain-soaked and hungry, struggling with his crutch and auction acquisitions, Fen just wants to get home. What he doesn’t want is to be drenched by a car and minutes later, confronted by the bad-tempered driver demanding he hand over his purchases. Hell no!
Ripley gets back his belongings but finds he wants more. Blue-eyed Fen has sparked something to life. Even as his barrister’s brain screams at him to be careful, he makes Fen an outrageous offer. Sleep with me for money. Fen should say no. Yet as he weighs his options, he realises turning Ripley down could be the biggest regret of his life.
In a tale where the pieces don’t always fit, can two imperfect men mend what’s broken in each other?
Warning
Main character with a life-limiting illness. Suicide of a character before story starts. Brief mention of rape and suicide of a man not in the story.
302 pages, Unknown Binding
First published May 2, 2024
220 people are currently reading
503 people want to read
About the author
Barbara Elsborg
100 books1,677 followersBarbara Elsborg lives in Kent in the south of England. She always wanted to be a spy, but having confessed to everyone without them even resorting to torture, she decided it was not for her. Volcanology scorched her feet. A morbid fear of sharks put paid to marine biology. So instead, she spent several years successfully selling cyanide.
After dragging up two rotten, ungrateful children and frustrating her sexy, devoted, wonderful husband (who can now stop twisting her arm) she finally has time to conduct an affair with an electrifying plugged-in male, her laptop.
Her books feature quirky heroines and bad boys, and she hopes they are as much fun to read as they are to write.
After dragging up two rotten, ungrateful children and frustrating her sexy, devoted, wonderful husband (who can now stop twisting her arm) she finally has time to conduct an affair with an electrifying plugged-in male, her laptop.
Her books feature quirky heroines and bad boys, and she hopes they are as much fun to read as they are to write.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 150 reviews
May 16, 2024
✰ 3.5 stars ✰
“We’re both broken in one way or another, but together we’re just about whole.”
When Ripley offered his proposition, I was as rattled as Fen was when he presented his terms and conditions. It is a credit to the writing that his reaction was described in such a visceral way that it evoked such a strong reaction from me. 💔 I mean, if they shared a mutual attraction, I understood why Fen was so confused as to why Ripley was making their relationship have a set time limit, complete with payment for the time spent with him. An indecent proposal that ultimately became something so much more meaningful than either of them had anticipated. 😢
For even after their ill-timed fated first meeting - which led to Ripley wanting more of him - as the story progressed, we get to learn why Ripley felt that he had to proceed with caution the way that he did. Why as Fen breaks down his walls and makes him feel more comfortable, more tolerant, more forgiving of not only the world around him, but of himself, does he woefully regret why he chose to treat Fen at an arm's length, when all he wants to do is keep him in his arms forever. 😔 And their scenes together were very sweet - very endearing and heartfelt - one that despite how poorly it began, it became a love they both felt so strongly about. 🫂
“I don’t mind being thought of as a piece of kintsugi. Broken but still useful.”
“I don’t see you as broken. You’re beautiful.”
It has been difficult, but I have accepted that there will always be a slight trace of Jonty in most of the characters that the author will bring to life; be it mannerisms or personalities or certain unique talents, they will be bound to make an appearance. 😣 But, that does not make them any less endearing; and I endeared to Fen. 😊 I endeared to how while he accepted Ripley's stipulations for their setup, it did not make him shy away from giving it all, knowing that 'too much happiness was dangerous.' Twenty-four-year-old Fen, who is a sweet and strong character that shined in all his brightest and darkest moments. 🤍🤍
To his resolute determination not to let his illness - muscular dystrophy - prevent him from living life to the full potential that he could, to his dauntless courage in standing up for himself against those who threatened to deface or demean him in any capacity against his better nature, and to his fierce comfort and compassion for Ripley in wanting to give him all the happiness and love that Ripley had lost feeling for himself - he was such a lovable and likeable character. the embodiment of imperfect perfection - that you couldn't help but feel for him. 🥺
“Everything is better with you,” Fen whispered. “You make me feel stronger. I know you’re there to catch me if I fall.”
“I’ll always be there to catch you. But promise not to break my heart.
Not now you’ve mended it.”
It took me a while to warm up to Riley, because I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt of why he behaved the way that he did. Even if you chalk it up to his role as a barrister that makes him view everything so critically, even I cringed at his approach and select choice of wording at times. 😐 But, as always, it is the past that haunts the present and seeing how deeply it affected his actions and behavior, making him act a lot more rough and closed off towards others. 'Ripley had come to accept that love, affection, and commitment were risks too big to take.' Seeing Fen be that person to help him heal the parts of himself that had been broken by his pain was really heartwarming. ❤️🩹
It is a complicated history - worsened by the troubling way in which he attempted to convey to Fen how much he desired him, but had to keep him at a distance to protect the part of him that was damaged. But the beauty of their dynamic also lies in how much of Fen's own personal life is now marred by the inevitable truth of his future, as well as the job he does as an antique restorer. 🥲 'You’re broken, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be mended.' And to see the two of them help and support each other in the smallest of ways that made the yearning in their intimate moments all the more palpable - I thought it was beautifully done and believably so. It is not smooth sailing entirely, but when it does settle in how deeply they care for each other, it was a romance that I found myself hoping would find a way to survive the test of time. 🥹🥹
“He found himself hugging Fen back and it felt as if for the first time in a long while, he could cope with someone showing him affection.
“Now I see a bit of the real you,” Fen whispered.
“I’m…trying.”
There is a real natural ease in which Elsborg writes - one that despite how I can pick up the slight traces of previous books, everything develops at such a seamless way - aided by sharp and witty repartee, heightened by her signature style of humor,and further enriched by compelling, if not amusing scenes that make the plot become whole. I like how she writes the romantic scenes - with a hint of quirky affection, but enough heat to spark a fire in both of them. 🥰 And despite a couple of horrid villainous characters that aggravated me to no end, there were a few side characters that were a delight; I would not mind if some of them had their own stories fleshed out. ☺️
There was one scene, however, that stood out for me - in a not so favorable way. I was not --- happy with Mateo's scene with Fen. I understand it was for the sake of the plot so that certain things could be cleared out, but I did not feel comfortable nor approve of Fen's actions there, despite how well-meaning his intentions were. 😕 I know it is a moot point of the story, but if I were in Ripley's position, I would have made quite a big deal out of it. I know it sounds petty and wrong, but it didn't quite sit right with me; but again, it is only my personal view, so. 🤷🏻♀️
“What I should have said was no one knows how long any of our lives will be.”
“That’s true and sort of the code I live by but that doesn’t factor in the effect of my illness on other people.”
“There’s one thing I know. My life would be better with you in it, whether that’s for five years or fifty.”
I have not read many stories that center on characters who struggle with muscular dystrophy, so I don't know for sure if how Fen balances his lifestyle with his condition is portrayed well enough. But, what I can say is that as much as it pained him to think that a future with Ripley may come with a price tag or even a time limit - without the necessary way in which they ended up together - I loved that he did not let it dictate his life or make him feel saddened by the limitations it put upon him. 😟 He lived life to the fullest - to the best of what he was capable of doing and I really admired that kind-hearted and generous part of him. There is a lot more that Fen has to deal with, which frustrated me at how horrid people were to him, but he never let that dampen his spirit; and I think that is just one of the many reasons why Ripley cared so strongly for him. 💞
And the prequel and sequel were both wonderful to read; when you see how integral both stories are to their character development, it makes their ending all the more satisfying, if not rewarding to see. It rounded up their story very well and made me so happy to see them get the happiness that they both deserved. 🫶🏻
“We’re both broken in one way or another, but together we’re just about whole.”
When Ripley offered his proposition, I was as rattled as Fen was when he presented his terms and conditions. It is a credit to the writing that his reaction was described in such a visceral way that it evoked such a strong reaction from me. 💔 I mean, if they shared a mutual attraction, I understood why Fen was so confused as to why Ripley was making their relationship have a set time limit, complete with payment for the time spent with him. An indecent proposal that ultimately became something so much more meaningful than either of them had anticipated. 😢
For even after their ill-timed fated first meeting - which led to Ripley wanting more of him - as the story progressed, we get to learn why Ripley felt that he had to proceed with caution the way that he did. Why as Fen breaks down his walls and makes him feel more comfortable, more tolerant, more forgiving of not only the world around him, but of himself, does he woefully regret why he chose to treat Fen at an arm's length, when all he wants to do is keep him in his arms forever. 😔 And their scenes together were very sweet - very endearing and heartfelt - one that despite how poorly it began, it became a love they both felt so strongly about. 🫂
“I don’t mind being thought of as a piece of kintsugi. Broken but still useful.”
“I don’t see you as broken. You’re beautiful.”
It has been difficult, but I have accepted that there will always be a slight trace of Jonty in most of the characters that the author will bring to life; be it mannerisms or personalities or certain unique talents, they will be bound to make an appearance. 😣 But, that does not make them any less endearing; and I endeared to Fen. 😊 I endeared to how while he accepted Ripley's stipulations for their setup, it did not make him shy away from giving it all, knowing that 'too much happiness was dangerous.' Twenty-four-year-old Fen, who is a sweet and strong character that shined in all his brightest and darkest moments. 🤍🤍
To his resolute determination not to let his illness - muscular dystrophy - prevent him from living life to the full potential that he could, to his dauntless courage in standing up for himself against those who threatened to deface or demean him in any capacity against his better nature, and to his fierce comfort and compassion for Ripley in wanting to give him all the happiness and love that Ripley had lost feeling for himself - he was such a lovable and likeable character. the embodiment of imperfect perfection - that you couldn't help but feel for him. 🥺
“Everything is better with you,” Fen whispered. “You make me feel stronger. I know you’re there to catch me if I fall.”
“I’ll always be there to catch you. But promise not to break my heart.
Not now you’ve mended it.”
It took me a while to warm up to Riley, because I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt of why he behaved the way that he did. Even if you chalk it up to his role as a barrister that makes him view everything so critically, even I cringed at his approach and select choice of wording at times. 😐 But, as always, it is the past that haunts the present and seeing how deeply it affected his actions and behavior, making him act a lot more rough and closed off towards others. 'Ripley had come to accept that love, affection, and commitment were risks too big to take.' Seeing Fen be that person to help him heal the parts of himself that had been broken by his pain was really heartwarming. ❤️🩹
It is a complicated history - worsened by the troubling way in which he attempted to convey to Fen how much he desired him, but had to keep him at a distance to protect the part of him that was damaged. But the beauty of their dynamic also lies in how much of Fen's own personal life is now marred by the inevitable truth of his future, as well as the job he does as an antique restorer. 🥲 'You’re broken, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be mended.' And to see the two of them help and support each other in the smallest of ways that made the yearning in their intimate moments all the more palpable - I thought it was beautifully done and believably so. It is not smooth sailing entirely, but when it does settle in how deeply they care for each other, it was a romance that I found myself hoping would find a way to survive the test of time. 🥹🥹
“He found himself hugging Fen back and it felt as if for the first time in a long while, he could cope with someone showing him affection.
“Now I see a bit of the real you,” Fen whispered.
“I’m…trying.”
There is a real natural ease in which Elsborg writes - one that despite how I can pick up the slight traces of previous books, everything develops at such a seamless way - aided by sharp and witty repartee, heightened by her signature style of humor,and further enriched by compelling, if not amusing scenes that make the plot become whole. I like how she writes the romantic scenes - with a hint of quirky affection, but enough heat to spark a fire in both of them. 🥰 And despite a couple of horrid villainous characters that aggravated me to no end, there were a few side characters that were a delight; I would not mind if some of them had their own stories fleshed out. ☺️
There was one scene, however, that stood out for me - in a not so favorable way. I was not --- happy with Mateo's scene with Fen. I understand it was for the sake of the plot so that certain things could be cleared out, but I did not feel comfortable nor approve of Fen's actions there, despite how well-meaning his intentions were. 😕 I know it is a moot point of the story, but if I were in Ripley's position, I would have made quite a big deal out of it. I know it sounds petty and wrong, but it didn't quite sit right with me; but again, it is only my personal view, so. 🤷🏻♀️
“What I should have said was no one knows how long any of our lives will be.”
“That’s true and sort of the code I live by but that doesn’t factor in the effect of my illness on other people.”
“There’s one thing I know. My life would be better with you in it, whether that’s for five years or fifty.”
I have not read many stories that center on characters who struggle with muscular dystrophy, so I don't know for sure if how Fen balances his lifestyle with his condition is portrayed well enough. But, what I can say is that as much as it pained him to think that a future with Ripley may come with a price tag or even a time limit - without the necessary way in which they ended up together - I loved that he did not let it dictate his life or make him feel saddened by the limitations it put upon him. 😟 He lived life to the fullest - to the best of what he was capable of doing and I really admired that kind-hearted and generous part of him. There is a lot more that Fen has to deal with, which frustrated me at how horrid people were to him, but he never let that dampen his spirit; and I think that is just one of the many reasons why Ripley cared so strongly for him. 💞
And the prequel and sequel were both wonderful to read; when you see how integral both stories are to their character development, it makes their ending all the more satisfying, if not rewarding to see. It rounded up their story very well and made me so happy to see them get the happiness that they both deserved. 🫶🏻
May 17, 2024
She keeps writing them;
I keep reading them. Jonty
formula again.
I keep reading them. Jonty
formula again.
Read
April 18, 2024I have written a prequel to this story - which is available to read for free on Book Funnel. This is the link
https://dl.bookfunnel.com/99gj2q5hy7
I've edited this comment to take into account a comment in the reviews below. I'm not able to respond directly to that person as they haven't enabled that facility but I don't want people to be put off reading Fen because they think he's going to die or that this is a sad story. No main character has ever died in one of my books.
Beckers Muscular Dystrophy is described by me and by online medical articles as life-limiting and not terminal which is why I used that term. The life expectancy varies from person to person.
https://dl.bookfunnel.com/99gj2q5hy7
I've edited this comment to take into account a comment in the reviews below. I'm not able to respond directly to that person as they haven't enabled that facility but I don't want people to be put off reading Fen because they think he's going to die or that this is a sad story. No main character has ever died in one of my books.
Beckers Muscular Dystrophy is described by me and by online medical articles as life-limiting and not terminal which is why I used that term. The life expectancy varies from person to person.
May 11, 2024
Barbara Elsborg’s latest novel Fen is a gorgeous, emotional male male romance which will bring you through all the highs and lows and back again. A hurt/comfort love story of the highest order, we fans know nobody does it better!
I don’t think there’s another author who can equal Elsborg’s skill at getting to the heart of her characters. The way she builds each man’s story - from the tragedies to the triumphs, and everything in between, Fen is simply stunning. Every bit of this novel gripped my attention. Regardless of the heartbreaking circumstances in Fen’s life, his eternal optimism gave me such inspiration. And watching Ripley’s heart, which had been frozen from tragedy, being slowly thawed by his interactions with Fen, was truly moving.
Barbara Elsborg’s fans will adore this novel, and if you’re unfamiliar with this amazing author, Fen is a marvelous place to start!
an arc of Fen was generously provided by the author for the purpose of my honest review, all opinions are my own
I don’t think there’s another author who can equal Elsborg’s skill at getting to the heart of her characters. The way she builds each man’s story - from the tragedies to the triumphs, and everything in between, Fen is simply stunning. Every bit of this novel gripped my attention. Regardless of the heartbreaking circumstances in Fen’s life, his eternal optimism gave me such inspiration. And watching Ripley’s heart, which had been frozen from tragedy, being slowly thawed by his interactions with Fen, was truly moving.
Barbara Elsborg’s fans will adore this novel, and if you’re unfamiliar with this amazing author, Fen is a marvelous place to start!
an arc of Fen was generously provided by the author for the purpose of my honest review, all opinions are my own
June 3, 2024
5+++ What an amazing story, I have no words to express the greatness of this book.
This author didn’t just write a story, she created the most momentous, compelling story.
How she developed Fen and Ripley’s layered characters and the journey they go through, was just magnificent.
Both men have a past and present that will blow your mind. My heart!
I loved Ripley’s flaws, man he was something special. And Fen, sweet, strong, witty Fen I hope you will love him as deeply as I do.
Both were, in their own specific way, soothing and healing for the other, and oh my goodness did they need that!
I don’t want to spoil the uniqueness of Fen and Ripley. Please read it yourself.
If you are familiar with this author you know you’ll get something special in your hands.
And this one was extraordinary from every angle! I laughed and cried with them.
Yes, this was a very Impressive story. All the stars and more!
Highly recommended!
This author didn’t just write a story, she created the most momentous, compelling story.
How she developed Fen and Ripley’s layered characters and the journey they go through, was just magnificent.
Both men have a past and present that will blow your mind. My heart!
I loved Ripley’s flaws, man he was something special. And Fen, sweet, strong, witty Fen I hope you will love him as deeply as I do.
Both were, in their own specific way, soothing and healing for the other, and oh my goodness did they need that!
I don’t want to spoil the uniqueness of Fen and Ripley. Please read it yourself.
If you are familiar with this author you know you’ll get something special in your hands.
And this one was extraordinary from every angle! I laughed and cried with them.
Yes, this was a very Impressive story. All the stars and more!
Highly recommended!
Read
August 31, 2024Fen Wood brings toned-down Jonty vibes -- difficult life, positive outlook, others have suffered more, etc. -- though he's less relentlessly bright-eyed than Jonty. I liked Fen, I did. Elsborg is good at snappy comebacks, so Fen made me laugh any number of times and his conversations with Ripley are convincingly flirty. I like the disability-horniness combination, too, what with being both disabled and horny myself.
And yet and yet and yet this book kept rubbing me the wrong way. "That’s one thing my mum told me when I was sad. To look around and imagine what pain others might be feeling. Not many of us go through life unscathed but we have to keep fighting.” OK, so if life hits you with a progressive, life-limiting disease that has made it impossible for you to do the work you were born for, and you feel sad about that, you should ... what? Set aside your sadness because other people have suffered too? Maybe that's not what Fen's mum and the author intend to say, but it sure comes close.
This bothered me, too: "... steering clear of any emotional attachment had led Ripley down a dangerous path for a while, experimenting in a dark world he’d eventually walked away from. He’d failed to see BDSM wasn’t the unemotional arrangement he’d imagined. It had its attractions, but it was not for him. Pain cured nothing. Not his nor anyone else’s." A dangerous path! A dark world! I want to tell myself that those phrases apply if someone's trying BDSM as a way to avoid feeling things and that they don't reflect an authorial judgment of kink in general, but ehhhhhhh that's a careless little passage. (Incidentally, pain isn't, in fact, a necessary component of all BDSM. Just saying, Barbara!)
Why, given later events, did the description of "a stranger with dirty blond hair, an ear full of piercings along with two nose studs and a bar in his eyebrow too" start looking like a characterization rather than a neutral physical description?
What shall I think when Ripley, who has been widowed by suicide (not really a spoiler: it becomes obvious early in the book if you've read the content notes at the end of the ad copy on GR), says, "I don't want to keep hurting," and Fen replies, "Well, that's up to you"? Yowza.
All these little off notes, none of them amounting to much taken in isolation, prime candidates for "yOU ArE Too sEnsITiVe" dismissal. But my Spidey-sense kept twanging.
And yet and yet and yet this book kept rubbing me the wrong way. "That’s one thing my mum told me when I was sad. To look around and imagine what pain others might be feeling. Not many of us go through life unscathed but we have to keep fighting.” OK, so if life hits you with a progressive, life-limiting disease that has made it impossible for you to do the work you were born for, and you feel sad about that, you should ... what? Set aside your sadness because other people have suffered too? Maybe that's not what Fen's mum and the author intend to say, but it sure comes close.
This bothered me, too: "... steering clear of any emotional attachment had led Ripley down a dangerous path for a while, experimenting in a dark world he’d eventually walked away from. He’d failed to see BDSM wasn’t the unemotional arrangement he’d imagined. It had its attractions, but it was not for him. Pain cured nothing. Not his nor anyone else’s." A dangerous path! A dark world! I want to tell myself that those phrases apply if someone's trying BDSM as a way to avoid feeling things and that they don't reflect an authorial judgment of kink in general, but ehhhhhhh that's a careless little passage. (Incidentally, pain isn't, in fact, a necessary component of all BDSM. Just saying, Barbara!)
Why, given later events, did the description of "a stranger with dirty blond hair, an ear full of piercings along with two nose studs and a bar in his eyebrow too" start looking like a characterization rather than a neutral physical description?
What shall I think when Ripley, who has been widowed by suicide (not really a spoiler: it becomes obvious early in the book if you've read the content notes at the end of the ad copy on GR), says, "I don't want to keep hurting," and Fen replies, "Well, that's up to you"? Yowza.
All these little off notes, none of them amounting to much taken in isolation, prime candidates for "yOU ArE Too sEnsITiVe" dismissal. But my Spidey-sense kept twanging.
May 13, 2024
Look, I can see why some people may like this book : if you love romance and don't mind like of plot beyond the romance (and terrible things happening) you may like this book.
The book is big, and not in a good way, I'm at 24.9% and the "proposal" in the blurb still didn't happen, yeah it's only 25% but it feels like 50% on a normal book (the book is that big) .
Basically I was bored, that's it, this book bored me.
The book is big, and not in a good way, I'm at 24.9% and the "proposal" in the blurb still didn't happen, yeah it's only 25% but it feels like 50% on a normal book (the book is that big) .
Basically I was bored, that's it, this book bored me.
May 16, 2024
This started so good and stayed good for a long time but then it started to drag. Then there was so much unnecessary drama. I loved Fen and I liked Ripley but then it seemed things were just too much. Very disappointing.
July 16, 2024
A- at AAR / 4.5 stars rounded up
I recently made a comment, on a review thread at AAR, about the fact that when I read contemporary romance, I generally stick to books by a handful of tried-and-tested authors, because I find so many novels in the genre are filled with the same stock-in-trade characters and the same tired tropes and plots that lack depth and emotion. Picking up a new contemporary by an author whose last book didn’t wow me could have backfired, but thankfully, Barbara Elsborg’s Fen delivered all the depth and emotional satisfaction I could have wished for. It’s one of those books I can only call ‘lovely’ - warm, funny, romantic and well-written, and I’m so very glad I decided to read it.
Twenty-four-year-old Fen Wood works as a repairer and restorer for a small antiques business. His boss is a bit of an arsehole, but Fen enjoys the work and it is, at least, a job he can do given the physical limitations he lives with as a consequence of Becker Muscular Dystrophy (BMD), a life-limiting illness. Fen has long since accepted he isn’t going to make old bones and is determined to live the best life he possibly can:
“… after the initial shock and his journey through every stage of grief, he’d understood there was no point in going through life miserable.”
And so he isn’t. Well, not too often. There are times when things get him down, but he’s incredibly strong and resilient, and he works hard to keep himself on an even keel, both mentally and physically.
Part of Fen’s job is attending auctions and bidding on items on behalf of the business, and on this particular day he also has his eye on one lot for himself. After the sale he’s slowly making his way (in the rain) towards the bus stop, struggling to manage the crutch he uses for balance and his purchases, when a posh car speeds past him, splashing him with dirty water. Great. The driver doesn’t stop or even appear to have noticed. A few minutes later, the same car pulls up alongside Fen; the man in the driver’s seat calls out that Fen has something that belongs to him and offers to pay him for the items he bought at the auction. Even though the offer is more than Fen paid, he doesn’t like the man’s unnecessarily aggressive attitude, says he isn’t interested and keeps walking. He’s wet and cold and just wants to get home.
Ripley Beaumont, a successful barrister, is furious when he learns that his mother has summarily sent a load of furniture and other items to be sold at auction. He doesn’t have a particular affection for the house he grew up in or any of the things in it; his annoyance is more to do with the fact that this is bound to be yet another of his mother’s attempts to get his attention – and he has no desire to play her games. The tragic death of his father when Ripley was just eight years old robbed him of the one person in his life who truly loved him; his mother was – and still is – a cold, manipulative and demanding woman who never told him she was proud of him or that she loved him. Ripley spent the rest of his childhood being ignored and quickly learned that the best way to avoid disappointment was never to become emotionally invested in anything. And the one time he did just reinforced Ripley’s conviction that he’s not cut out for relationships.
When he finds out that she included a box of stuff from his old bedroom in the things she sent out for auction, he’s even angrier. He races to the auction house to retrieve his possessions, only to find that they’ve already been sold – and as he finds out soon afterwards, “the bloody stroppy cute-looking guy” who bought them isn’t willing to sell them back to him. But he isn’t one to give up easily, and a few days later, goes to Winn’s Antiques hoping that perhaps he’ll be able to change the guy’s mind.
In the meantime, Fen has discovered that one of the items hidden in the puzzle box is a George Cross medal awarded to one Russell Belmont. He can’t possibly keep it, and isn’t going to sell it, even though it’s worth a lot of money; he plans to track down the owner and return it. So he isn’t completely surprised when Ripley shows up at the shop a few days after later. He explains about the medal – which Ripley had no idea was in the box – returns it, and rather surprises himself when he agrees to meet Ripley for a drink later that evening.
Ripley is smitten with Fen from almost the moment he sets eyes on him, and just can’t explain it. There’s something about him – he’s beautiful, yes, but it’s more than that. He’s got a smart mouth on him, he’s funny and passionate about the things he cares about… he’s also too young (Ripley is late thirties) and vulnerable and not at all Ripley’s type – yet is exactly what he wants. The chemistry between them sizzles right from the start, and the drink extends to an outing to an exhibition, then dinner and lively conversation – and a passionate kiss at the end of the evening.
After a maybe-date a few days later and frequent text exchanges while Ripley is away for a few days on a case, Fen is hoping they might be moving towards putting things between them on a firmer footing. Ripley has taken the trouble to find out about Fen’s condition and it hasn’t sent him running in the opposite direction; he cares about Fen’s comfort but isn’t overprotective; he’s funny and he listens, really listens, to what Fen has to say, whether it’s about his love for Japanese ceramics or his favourite books. When Ripley asks Fen to be his lover – to live with him, go places with him, travel with him - Fen thinks its an odd way to ask someone to go out with them. But then he realises that isn’t what Ripley asking for. He’s not looking for a relationship or love – he wants a companion and sexual partner he can simply walk away from in six month’s time, and he’s making sure Fen doesn’t get any ideas about happily ever after. And in return for six months of Fen’s time, he’ll pay him a large sum of money. The proposal leaves Fen deeply upset and very conflicted. He likes Ripley – a lot – and would happily be his boyfriend without the need for payment. Just once, after a life filled with rejection, he’d like to be with someone who sees him as worth keeping. On the other hand, the money Ripley is offering would give Fen the chance to do some of the things on his bucket list, things he’ll never get to do otherwise. And would it be so bad to get paid for doing something he wants to do anyway?
Its clear that Ripley is struggling with the strength of his feelings for Fen even as he makes his offer, and that turning it into a transaction is his way of trying to remain in control. It’s just as clear that he’s closed the stable door too late; he and Fen are perfect for each other but Ripley is so determined to eschew commitment – for truly heart-breaking reasons - that he refuses to let himself see it. Ripley believes he’s broken, that he’s not designed for love and affection, and I loved watching Fen, with his delightfully sassy humour, his indomitable spirit, his fierce determination never to let others demean or diminish him in any way, quickly burrowing his way into Ripley’s battered heart and proving him wrong.
Fen is a wonderful breath of fresh air – very honest about the way his condition is likely to go, but determined not to let it dictate the way he lives his life any more than it has to. The author has obviously done her homework about BMD and does a great job of showing how hard Fen works to maintain his mostly positive outlook. I had a couple of minor niggles that meant I couldn’t quite give the book a full-on A grade, but they are minor and didn’t impact my enjoyment of the story. Fen is funny and sweet and charming, but it packs quite the emotional punch. I’m happy to recommend it.
Note:
I recently made a comment, on a review thread at AAR, about the fact that when I read contemporary romance, I generally stick to books by a handful of tried-and-tested authors, because I find so many novels in the genre are filled with the same stock-in-trade characters and the same tired tropes and plots that lack depth and emotion. Picking up a new contemporary by an author whose last book didn’t wow me could have backfired, but thankfully, Barbara Elsborg’s Fen delivered all the depth and emotional satisfaction I could have wished for. It’s one of those books I can only call ‘lovely’ - warm, funny, romantic and well-written, and I’m so very glad I decided to read it.
Twenty-four-year-old Fen Wood works as a repairer and restorer for a small antiques business. His boss is a bit of an arsehole, but Fen enjoys the work and it is, at least, a job he can do given the physical limitations he lives with as a consequence of Becker Muscular Dystrophy (BMD), a life-limiting illness. Fen has long since accepted he isn’t going to make old bones and is determined to live the best life he possibly can:
“… after the initial shock and his journey through every stage of grief, he’d understood there was no point in going through life miserable.”
And so he isn’t. Well, not too often. There are times when things get him down, but he’s incredibly strong and resilient, and he works hard to keep himself on an even keel, both mentally and physically.
Part of Fen’s job is attending auctions and bidding on items on behalf of the business, and on this particular day he also has his eye on one lot for himself. After the sale he’s slowly making his way (in the rain) towards the bus stop, struggling to manage the crutch he uses for balance and his purchases, when a posh car speeds past him, splashing him with dirty water. Great. The driver doesn’t stop or even appear to have noticed. A few minutes later, the same car pulls up alongside Fen; the man in the driver’s seat calls out that Fen has something that belongs to him and offers to pay him for the items he bought at the auction. Even though the offer is more than Fen paid, he doesn’t like the man’s unnecessarily aggressive attitude, says he isn’t interested and keeps walking. He’s wet and cold and just wants to get home.
Ripley Beaumont, a successful barrister, is furious when he learns that his mother has summarily sent a load of furniture and other items to be sold at auction. He doesn’t have a particular affection for the house he grew up in or any of the things in it; his annoyance is more to do with the fact that this is bound to be yet another of his mother’s attempts to get his attention – and he has no desire to play her games. The tragic death of his father when Ripley was just eight years old robbed him of the one person in his life who truly loved him; his mother was – and still is – a cold, manipulative and demanding woman who never told him she was proud of him or that she loved him. Ripley spent the rest of his childhood being ignored and quickly learned that the best way to avoid disappointment was never to become emotionally invested in anything. And the one time he did just reinforced Ripley’s conviction that he’s not cut out for relationships.
When he finds out that she included a box of stuff from his old bedroom in the things she sent out for auction, he’s even angrier. He races to the auction house to retrieve his possessions, only to find that they’ve already been sold – and as he finds out soon afterwards, “the bloody stroppy cute-looking guy” who bought them isn’t willing to sell them back to him. But he isn’t one to give up easily, and a few days later, goes to Winn’s Antiques hoping that perhaps he’ll be able to change the guy’s mind.
In the meantime, Fen has discovered that one of the items hidden in the puzzle box is a George Cross medal awarded to one Russell Belmont. He can’t possibly keep it, and isn’t going to sell it, even though it’s worth a lot of money; he plans to track down the owner and return it. So he isn’t completely surprised when Ripley shows up at the shop a few days after later. He explains about the medal – which Ripley had no idea was in the box – returns it, and rather surprises himself when he agrees to meet Ripley for a drink later that evening.
Ripley is smitten with Fen from almost the moment he sets eyes on him, and just can’t explain it. There’s something about him – he’s beautiful, yes, but it’s more than that. He’s got a smart mouth on him, he’s funny and passionate about the things he cares about… he’s also too young (Ripley is late thirties) and vulnerable and not at all Ripley’s type – yet is exactly what he wants. The chemistry between them sizzles right from the start, and the drink extends to an outing to an exhibition, then dinner and lively conversation – and a passionate kiss at the end of the evening.
After a maybe-date a few days later and frequent text exchanges while Ripley is away for a few days on a case, Fen is hoping they might be moving towards putting things between them on a firmer footing. Ripley has taken the trouble to find out about Fen’s condition and it hasn’t sent him running in the opposite direction; he cares about Fen’s comfort but isn’t overprotective; he’s funny and he listens, really listens, to what Fen has to say, whether it’s about his love for Japanese ceramics or his favourite books. When Ripley asks Fen to be his lover – to live with him, go places with him, travel with him - Fen thinks its an odd way to ask someone to go out with them. But then he realises that isn’t what Ripley asking for. He’s not looking for a relationship or love – he wants a companion and sexual partner he can simply walk away from in six month’s time, and he’s making sure Fen doesn’t get any ideas about happily ever after. And in return for six months of Fen’s time, he’ll pay him a large sum of money. The proposal leaves Fen deeply upset and very conflicted. He likes Ripley – a lot – and would happily be his boyfriend without the need for payment. Just once, after a life filled with rejection, he’d like to be with someone who sees him as worth keeping. On the other hand, the money Ripley is offering would give Fen the chance to do some of the things on his bucket list, things he’ll never get to do otherwise. And would it be so bad to get paid for doing something he wants to do anyway?
Its clear that Ripley is struggling with the strength of his feelings for Fen even as he makes his offer, and that turning it into a transaction is his way of trying to remain in control. It’s just as clear that he’s closed the stable door too late; he and Fen are perfect for each other but Ripley is so determined to eschew commitment – for truly heart-breaking reasons - that he refuses to let himself see it. Ripley believes he’s broken, that he’s not designed for love and affection, and I loved watching Fen, with his delightfully sassy humour, his indomitable spirit, his fierce determination never to let others demean or diminish him in any way, quickly burrowing his way into Ripley’s battered heart and proving him wrong.
Fen is a wonderful breath of fresh air – very honest about the way his condition is likely to go, but determined not to let it dictate the way he lives his life any more than it has to. The author has obviously done her homework about BMD and does a great job of showing how hard Fen works to maintain his mostly positive outlook. I had a couple of minor niggles that meant I couldn’t quite give the book a full-on A grade, but they are minor and didn’t impact my enjoyment of the story. Fen is funny and sweet and charming, but it packs quite the emotional punch. I’m happy to recommend it.
Note:
May 4, 2024
2.5⭐️ I really loved the premise of this story and small bits and pieces, mainly Fen and how he dealt with his illness. I hurt for him so much but it really became bizarre and unrealistic how many terrible things happened to him.
We didn’t get enough of Ripley until later in the book, which was past the point of me caring. I just couldn’t like him.
Also, this was 100 pages too long. The first 25% was boring and dragged, and the end was outrageously unrealistic. Overall, not Barbara’s best work.
We didn’t get enough of Ripley until later in the book, which was past the point of me caring. I just couldn’t like him.
Also, this was 100 pages too long. The first 25% was boring and dragged, and the end was outrageously unrealistic. Overall, not Barbara’s best work.
Read
May 13, 2024DNF 15%
I really do not like Ripley, or the grey cloud over the story. I like Fen a lot and he deserves some soft, gentle, romance and I can tell this won’t be it so I’m out.
I’m sad as I do typically love this author but I knew it likely wouldn’t be for me as I don’t love the sex for money trope.
I really do not like Ripley, or the grey cloud over the story. I like Fen a lot and he deserves some soft, gentle, romance and I can tell this won’t be it so I’m out.
I’m sad as I do typically love this author but I knew it likely wouldn’t be for me as I don’t love the sex for money trope.
May 8, 2024
I really enjoyed reading Ren, just like all the other books by Barbara Elsborg that I’ve read her characters are consuming that have you laughing one minute to getting in your feels the next.
Also the way Barbara deals with difficult subjects such as disabilities and suicide is handled in such a sensitive and careful manner that you don’t always witness.
Fen has been dealt a short hand after being diagnosed with a type of muscular dystrophy and abandoned by his famous father however things start to turn around once he meets a brooding Barrister with a difficult past.
I definitely recommend giving this book a read you won’t regret it.
Also the way Barbara deals with difficult subjects such as disabilities and suicide is handled in such a sensitive and careful manner that you don’t always witness.
Fen has been dealt a short hand after being diagnosed with a type of muscular dystrophy and abandoned by his famous father however things start to turn around once he meets a brooding Barrister with a difficult past.
I definitely recommend giving this book a read you won’t regret it.
January 5, 2025
5 stars. Excellent. There is alot packed into this book, a fantastic number of complications, secrets, twists and turns. Rich/poor age gap story is giving Pretty Woman vibes. While not a sex worker, there is a temporary romantic arrangement with a begin/end date that gives it that “hired” feeling.
The couple is great and the obstacles are done well, contemporary city setting. Christmas time and holiday grief a major aspect of the story. The past hurts can get heavy, with mild/medium angst, medium drama and suicide of a past lover. There is immense beauty buried in the story, about using the time we’re given. One man desperate for more time, but medical fate cruelly putting a limit to his time on earth and one man who seemed to have all the time in the world, but ended it by his own hand. One greedy for more time, one unable to tolerate one more second. Beautifully complicated.
Inclusivity, different-abled, muscular dystrophy, suicide of past lover, m/m, barrister, antique restoration, age gap, rich/poor, Pretty Woman, arrangement, contemporary, UK, Christmas, high spice, t/b roles.
The couple is great and the obstacles are done well, contemporary city setting. Christmas time and holiday grief a major aspect of the story. The past hurts can get heavy, with mild/medium angst, medium drama and suicide of a past lover. There is immense beauty buried in the story, about using the time we’re given. One man desperate for more time, but medical fate cruelly putting a limit to his time on earth and one man who seemed to have all the time in the world, but ended it by his own hand. One greedy for more time, one unable to tolerate one more second. Beautifully complicated.
Inclusivity, different-abled, muscular dystrophy, suicide of past lover, m/m, barrister, antique restoration, age gap, rich/poor, Pretty Woman, arrangement, contemporary, UK, Christmas, high spice, t/b roles.
April 10, 2024
ARC review.
Utterly gorgeous new addition from the pen of the incredibly talented Barbara Elsborg.
I don’t write many reviews, but the coming together of two such shattered souls and their subsequent journey towards love deserves all the kudos.
Barbara Elsborg writes with such heart and humour, it’s almost impossible not to live and breathe her characters’ lives with all their ups — and so many awful downs — before she puts them back together for the most satisfying of HEAs.
Now I have to limit myself to not rereading until release day, when I shall once again immerse myself in their world, and enjoy it all over again.
Utterly gorgeous new addition from the pen of the incredibly talented Barbara Elsborg.
I don’t write many reviews, but the coming together of two such shattered souls and their subsequent journey towards love deserves all the kudos.
Barbara Elsborg writes with such heart and humour, it’s almost impossible not to live and breathe her characters’ lives with all their ups — and so many awful downs — before she puts them back together for the most satisfying of HEAs.
Now I have to limit myself to not rereading until release day, when I shall once again immerse myself in their world, and enjoy it all over again.
September 14, 2024
An unlikely (ridiculous) premise, lots (too much) thrown into the mix, and a saintly MC (St Fen). And that’s before you even get to the horrible disease that’s going to shorten his life.
April 24, 2024
An All Feels Story
This story takes place after Taking a Risk a prequel 6 years before the main book introducing Fen’s story.
In the prequel Fen was 18 years old, along with his friends, Morgan and Seth planning to enter a gay club. He mets a Master, he as Oskar, will never forget.
Now Fen, 24, worked at an antiques shop for Charles attending an auction in the rain. That was where he picked up a wooden box, and finding the owner wanted it back. Fen was disabled with a disease that was killing him.
Ripley was a barrister who wasnt happy with his mother auctioning things off that he had to recover.
I didnt like Ripley in this at the start as I thought he was kinda a jerk the way he treats Fen.
The story progresses with them becoming closer especially after Fen confesses his illness.
Drama scenes happen which gives them both a scare. This was a slow romance from the start, which progressed into a special arrangement. I wasn't sure about the 6 months offer especially when Fen already had a job, it just felt wrong for Fen. But then things got worse for him as a few dramas playout.
Fen was dying and he had a bucket list he wanted to do.
Ripley had baggage from the past where he’d been hurt, but it seemed to me he was setting himself up again knowing Fen would be gone, maybe😉
This is a big story for them with scenes tugging the heartstrings.
Includes both povs for an HEA ending.
This story takes place after Taking a Risk a prequel 6 years before the main book introducing Fen’s story.
In the prequel Fen was 18 years old, along with his friends, Morgan and Seth planning to enter a gay club. He mets a Master, he as Oskar, will never forget.
Now Fen, 24, worked at an antiques shop for Charles attending an auction in the rain. That was where he picked up a wooden box, and finding the owner wanted it back. Fen was disabled with a disease that was killing him.
Ripley was a barrister who wasnt happy with his mother auctioning things off that he had to recover.
I didnt like Ripley in this at the start as I thought he was kinda a jerk the way he treats Fen.
The story progresses with them becoming closer especially after Fen confesses his illness.
Drama scenes happen which gives them both a scare. This was a slow romance from the start, which progressed into a special arrangement. I wasn't sure about the 6 months offer especially when Fen already had a job, it just felt wrong for Fen. But then things got worse for him as a few dramas playout.
Fen was dying and he had a bucket list he wanted to do.
Ripley had baggage from the past where he’d been hurt, but it seemed to me he was setting himself up again knowing Fen would be gone, maybe😉
This is a big story for them with scenes tugging the heartstrings.
Includes both povs for an HEA ending.
May 5, 2024
A beautifully rendered hot, sexy, intimate, and rewarding love story
Oh, my heart, this one got me, as do so many of Barbara Elsborg’s stories. Her Jonty Bloom books are my favorites, but this might be a new one along with them. I loved Fen so much! I should note there is a free prequel (the author links to it on her page, you can find it on Bookfunnel) that I thought was not safe for me but thanks to an amazing thing, it was and I loved it, and how it connects to this read. That's titled Taking a Risk, check it out. I hear there is also a bonus extra story available through the author's newsletter, which I'll be looking for.
Fen himself makes the book. Living with muscular dystrophy, he could see life as a big loss—of his talent for ballet, of his physicality, of potential. But instead he’s getting on with things, doing activities that help him stay healthy, living his life with what he’s been given and owning it. I adored him. He’s one of those characters with such a strong moral compass that you just root for him out of the gate and want to wrap him in bubble wrap and keep him happy.
Alas, to get to the happy, we must have conflict!
And the conflict! Along comes Ripley. Older, jaded, cynical, a barrister, but with a heart under there somewhere, his actions should have bruised and broken Fen, but somehow, with Fen, he makes mistakes but even he himself knows something’s off about his usual approach and that he’s screwing up, because he’s clearly acting as he would with most people but also realizing…Fen isn’t most people, and he comes to value and cherish Fen for who Fen is as a human and not just someone he wants to date for a limited time. Ripley is kicking and screaming inside, trying to avoid those potentially painful ties and emotions, yes, but, you can see Fen capture him long before Ripley even realizes it, and you know Ripley’s ridiculous dumb proposition and actions are going to bite him in the butt. The tension fills the pages with anticipation and kept me flipping them to see what he’d screw up next and how Fen would Show him how he messed up (just by being himself, not because he’s trying to) while making him fall even harder.
The situation is poignant and heartbreaking and heart-healing and really well done, full of banter and sexiness, and heartache and oh, to have to see them go through the mess of their own making is rough but so rewarding. There is a real plot, with Fen’s job and how it intersects with Ripley’s life and gets screwed up, and Fen’s big parental secret has a spectacular blowup toward the end but still feels woven in and I loved how it worked out.
Terrific read, Barbara Elsborg!
HEA, hard fought, hero living with a disability (BMD), age-gap, grumpy sort of wistful sunshine, rich-not-so-rich, no cheating or any others at all (thank you author!). Highly recommended, as is everything I’ve ever read from this author. She’s terrific.
Oh, my heart, this one got me, as do so many of Barbara Elsborg’s stories. Her Jonty Bloom books are my favorites, but this might be a new one along with them. I loved Fen so much! I should note there is a free prequel (the author links to it on her page, you can find it on Bookfunnel) that I thought was not safe for me but thanks to an amazing thing, it was and I loved it, and how it connects to this read. That's titled Taking a Risk, check it out. I hear there is also a bonus extra story available through the author's newsletter, which I'll be looking for.
Fen himself makes the book. Living with muscular dystrophy, he could see life as a big loss—of his talent for ballet, of his physicality, of potential. But instead he’s getting on with things, doing activities that help him stay healthy, living his life with what he’s been given and owning it. I adored him. He’s one of those characters with such a strong moral compass that you just root for him out of the gate and want to wrap him in bubble wrap and keep him happy.
Alas, to get to the happy, we must have conflict!
And the conflict! Along comes Ripley. Older, jaded, cynical, a barrister, but with a heart under there somewhere, his actions should have bruised and broken Fen, but somehow, with Fen, he makes mistakes but even he himself knows something’s off about his usual approach and that he’s screwing up, because he’s clearly acting as he would with most people but also realizing…Fen isn’t most people, and he comes to value and cherish Fen for who Fen is as a human and not just someone he wants to date for a limited time. Ripley is kicking and screaming inside, trying to avoid those potentially painful ties and emotions, yes, but, you can see Fen capture him long before Ripley even realizes it, and you know Ripley’s ridiculous dumb proposition and actions are going to bite him in the butt. The tension fills the pages with anticipation and kept me flipping them to see what he’d screw up next and how Fen would Show him how he messed up (just by being himself, not because he’s trying to) while making him fall even harder.
The situation is poignant and heartbreaking and heart-healing and really well done, full of banter and sexiness, and heartache and oh, to have to see them go through the mess of their own making is rough but so rewarding. There is a real plot, with Fen’s job and how it intersects with Ripley’s life and gets screwed up, and Fen’s big parental secret has a spectacular blowup toward the end but still feels woven in and I loved how it worked out.
Terrific read, Barbara Elsborg!
HEA, hard fought, hero living with a disability (BMD), age-gap, grumpy sort of wistful sunshine, rich-not-so-rich, no cheating or any others at all (thank you author!). Highly recommended, as is everything I’ve ever read from this author. She’s terrific.
May 7, 2024
4.5 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⚡
Another fabulous read by Barbara Elsborg
As has become the norm with this author's books, I got sucked into the characters and the story which was full of emotion, drama and spice. I liked both main characters though they both had their flaws each man could see past them and fell for the other, baggage and all. A lot goes on once Fen and Ripley meet and there's a fair bit of drama hanging around them both. There were a few times I wished they'd talked more about how they were feeling, but I know how hard talking about difficult things can be so I understood their reticence to do so.
I didn't know much about BDM or Becker Muscular Dystrophy, I didn't even know there were different types of Muscular Dystrophy. Seeing how this affected Fen day to day and how it had destroyed his dreams of being a dancer and how he didn't want to be a burden to anyone, especially Ripley, made my heart ache and knowing that people are going through this every day made me appreciate my own reasonably healthy body.
Losing someone to suicide is a terrible thing to go through and deal with emotionally, and my heart broke for Ripley when I learned of what he'd lost and his struggle to get past it. Fen and his beautiful heart were made to help Ripley heal and move forward even if there were a few bumps along the way.
A great read, this author is a definite one click.
Another fabulous read by Barbara Elsborg
As has become the norm with this author's books, I got sucked into the characters and the story which was full of emotion, drama and spice. I liked both main characters though they both had their flaws each man could see past them and fell for the other, baggage and all. A lot goes on once Fen and Ripley meet and there's a fair bit of drama hanging around them both. There were a few times I wished they'd talked more about how they were feeling, but I know how hard talking about difficult things can be so I understood their reticence to do so.
I didn't know much about BDM or Becker Muscular Dystrophy, I didn't even know there were different types of Muscular Dystrophy. Seeing how this affected Fen day to day and how it had destroyed his dreams of being a dancer and how he didn't want to be a burden to anyone, especially Ripley, made my heart ache and knowing that people are going through this every day made me appreciate my own reasonably healthy body.
Losing someone to suicide is a terrible thing to go through and deal with emotionally, and my heart broke for Ripley when I learned of what he'd lost and his struggle to get past it. Fen and his beautiful heart were made to help Ripley heal and move forward even if there were a few bumps along the way.
A great read, this author is a definite one click.
June 13, 2024
A Joyfully Jay review.
5 stars
Fen is a contemporary get-together story by Barbara Elsborg. It’s set in the UK and includes themes like age-gap, income gap, and colossal misunderstandings. Fen and Ripley are a little sunshine/grump respectively, but more than anything, I feel like these two are star-crossed and not sure what to do about it. The “I’ll pay you to be my boyfriend” is very Pretty Woman, but I liked how this device was very up-front and how Fen and Ripley kept mulling over what the offer actually means to and for them.
Overall, if you enjoy witty MCs with amazing chemistry or you like the Pretty Woman trope, I think you’ll love this story. I was enthralled with Fen and Ripley who felt incredibly well developed and interesting as individuals, and together seemed almost unstoppable.
Read Camille’s review in its entirety here.
5 stars
Fen is a contemporary get-together story by Barbara Elsborg. It’s set in the UK and includes themes like age-gap, income gap, and colossal misunderstandings. Fen and Ripley are a little sunshine/grump respectively, but more than anything, I feel like these two are star-crossed and not sure what to do about it. The “I’ll pay you to be my boyfriend” is very Pretty Woman, but I liked how this device was very up-front and how Fen and Ripley kept mulling over what the offer actually means to and for them.
Overall, if you enjoy witty MCs with amazing chemistry or you like the Pretty Woman trope, I think you’ll love this story. I was enthralled with Fen and Ripley who felt incredibly well developed and interesting as individuals, and together seemed almost unstoppable.
Read Camille’s review in its entirety here.
May 17, 2024
4.5 stars rounded up.
Fen and Ripley, MC's in this very heart warming story by Barbara Elsborg. Both have a great deal of baggage, Ripley hates Christmas because the man he loved died during this time two years ago, and Fen, who has a crippling and potential fatal disease who had to give up his dream of ballet and has to fight every day to lead a somewhat normal life.
This book was funny, poignant, sad but ultimately very uplifting. Just my cup of tea.
Fen and Ripley, MC's in this very heart warming story by Barbara Elsborg. Both have a great deal of baggage, Ripley hates Christmas because the man he loved died during this time two years ago, and Fen, who has a crippling and potential fatal disease who had to give up his dream of ballet and has to fight every day to lead a somewhat normal life.
This book was funny, poignant, sad but ultimately very uplifting. Just my cup of tea.
April 12, 2024
I didn’t just love Fen Wood, I flipping worship him. I just can’t even say how adorable he is.
He’s the sweetest, kindest guy. The sort that will give the last penny out of his pocket to a homeless person on the street. He’d probably give them his shoes too. He’s noble, he’s clever, he’s so talented. I want to love him forever and take all of his woes away.
Barbara Elsborg has enchanted me once again with her boys.
I needed Ripley Belmont to be the best guy in the world if he was going to be good enough for my boy Fen. Then he may have pulled off a blinder, because he is as perfect for Fen as he could possibly be - once you get past the secrets.
“We’re both broken in one way or another, but together we’re just about whole.”
I am completely smitten with the both of them. I loved the story and where it took them. I love the strength of Fen. His disability does not contain him, he rises above it because life really is too short to stay sad.
Great book. Absolutely deserves my 5 stars.
He’s the sweetest, kindest guy. The sort that will give the last penny out of his pocket to a homeless person on the street. He’d probably give them his shoes too. He’s noble, he’s clever, he’s so talented. I want to love him forever and take all of his woes away.
Barbara Elsborg has enchanted me once again with her boys.
I needed Ripley Belmont to be the best guy in the world if he was going to be good enough for my boy Fen. Then he may have pulled off a blinder, because he is as perfect for Fen as he could possibly be - once you get past the secrets.
“We’re both broken in one way or another, but together we’re just about whole.”
I am completely smitten with the both of them. I loved the story and where it took them. I love the strength of Fen. His disability does not contain him, he rises above it because life really is too short to stay sad.
Great book. Absolutely deserves my 5 stars.
December 29, 2025
This is really just a note to self:
There were elements of this story that I loved and for those, I can see myself reading this one again. Future me, go ahead and do it.
On the other hand, there were elements that I disliked (Ripley’s offer to pay Fen especially, I’m super over that trope and it felt cringy and edging on problematic). That said, the stronger elements of the story kept me invested, so much so that I found it hard to put this book down. I ended up enjoying it despite the details I disliked and the fact that Elsborg’s brand/the Jonty vibe has staled for me.
The parts I loved would get 4-5 stars but honestly, I can’t bring myself to give this one more than 3 overall.
There were elements of this story that I loved and for those, I can see myself reading this one again. Future me, go ahead and do it.
On the other hand, there were elements that I disliked (Ripley’s offer to pay Fen especially, I’m super over that trope and it felt cringy and edging on problematic). That said, the stronger elements of the story kept me invested, so much so that I found it hard to put this book down. I ended up enjoying it despite the details I disliked and the fact that Elsborg’s brand/the Jonty vibe has staled for me.
The parts I loved would get 4-5 stars but honestly, I can’t bring myself to give this one more than 3 overall.
November 16, 2024
MM - 🎶 Money Can’t Buy Me Love 🎵
Fen’s story had me crying so much. My heart was breaking for him, for the hardships he had suffered without a father, inheriting a life limiting disease passed down through his mother, plus the looks and comments from people that impacted him every day of his life, particularly where he worked.
He loved the work he did repairing and restoring antique furniture and other items, and he adored ceramics in particular.
Through this work he met with Ripley when Fen bought an old box at an auction intending to restore it. The box and a lot of other items were given by Ripley’s mother to be sold, against Ripley’s wishes. In his efforts to get them back he started tracking down Fen. I’ll say no more in case I end up with spoilers.
I enjoyed this book so much, the various characters were so well developed in their varying roles and the storyline was so interesting in its setting and build up. There were so many different threads that kept this book so exciting and interesting right up to the end.
Most of all though, Fen, I just wanted something of a miracle to happen for him. He was such a positive ray of sunshine despite all he went through, I loved his sassiness and sense of humour.
Ripley annoyed me so much at times especially his reasoning around some of his decisions and how they impacted Fen.
If you have possible triggers I suggest checking the authors warnings as there is mention of death of parent, a graphic description of suicide by a side character.
I like this authors storytelling and I want to read more from her.
Fen’s story had me crying so much. My heart was breaking for him, for the hardships he had suffered without a father, inheriting a life limiting disease passed down through his mother, plus the looks and comments from people that impacted him every day of his life, particularly where he worked.
He loved the work he did repairing and restoring antique furniture and other items, and he adored ceramics in particular.
Through this work he met with Ripley when Fen bought an old box at an auction intending to restore it. The box and a lot of other items were given by Ripley’s mother to be sold, against Ripley’s wishes. In his efforts to get them back he started tracking down Fen. I’ll say no more in case I end up with spoilers.
I enjoyed this book so much, the various characters were so well developed in their varying roles and the storyline was so interesting in its setting and build up. There were so many different threads that kept this book so exciting and interesting right up to the end.
Most of all though, Fen, I just wanted something of a miracle to happen for him. He was such a positive ray of sunshine despite all he went through, I loved his sassiness and sense of humour.
Ripley annoyed me so much at times especially his reasoning around some of his decisions and how they impacted Fen.
If you have possible triggers I suggest checking the authors warnings as there is mention of death of parent, a graphic description of suicide by a side character.
I like this authors storytelling and I want to read more from her.
June 18, 2024
3,75 stars
I hadn’t read anything by this author for a while, and ‘Fen’ caught my attention for the interesting blurb. Tbh, for some reason this book leaves me tongue-tied, so I’ll try to get to the main points (in no particular order 😂) …
.) It took me a while to get into the book. I found the first third a little bit tedious but enjoyed the rest a lot more.
.) I liked Fen. The way he copes with his illness is admirable. He is open, honest and straightforward. And he is not scared to hope, despite it all.
.) While Ripley is clearly a nice guy, I never quite understood him 100%, and as a result I felt detached from him rather than rooting for him.
.) I’m not sure if the relationship between Fen and Ripley really knocked me off my socks. It left me marginally underwhelmed. Mainly, I missed some more intense feelings. And the plotline about 'paying Fen for sex' fell a bit sideways.
.) The plot felt a little bit over-dramatic in parts.
It’s not often you get an epilogue 20 years on. It was perfect here and the only thing that really gripped my heart.
All in all an enjoyable read with informative insights into muscular dystrophy.
I hadn’t read anything by this author for a while, and ‘Fen’ caught my attention for the interesting blurb. Tbh, for some reason this book leaves me tongue-tied, so I’ll try to get to the main points (in no particular order 😂) …
.) It took me a while to get into the book. I found the first third a little bit tedious but enjoyed the rest a lot more.
.) I liked Fen. The way he copes with his illness is admirable. He is open, honest and straightforward. And he is not scared to hope, despite it all.
.) While Ripley is clearly a nice guy, I never quite understood him 100%, and as a result I felt detached from him rather than rooting for him.
.) I’m not sure if the relationship between Fen and Ripley really knocked me off my socks. It left me marginally underwhelmed. Mainly, I missed some more intense feelings. And the plotline about 'paying Fen for sex' fell a bit sideways.
.) The plot felt a little bit over-dramatic in parts.
It’s not often you get an epilogue 20 years on. It was perfect here and the only thing that really gripped my heart.
All in all an enjoyable read with informative insights into muscular dystrophy.
April 11, 2024
Just brilliant!
I really don’t think I have the words or the eloquence to tell you how this book touched my soul.
Fen and Ripley are individually “broken” in their own ways but together are perfect. Fen is quirky, sassy , cheerful and utterly intriguing. Ripley is the epitome of a person with repressed emotions who lives behind a carefully constructed mask leading a rather lonely life. Circumstances have them coming into each other’s lives, making agreements and falling in lust (featuring plenty of steam mixed with pure tenderness) before love captures their hearts.
The author weaves together a beautiful tale of romance and heartache with two strong complex characters that fight for their well deserved HEA. I laughed, sighed and cried my way through this utterly endearing and engaging read and just let the waves of emotions wash through me as I knew the story telling ability of Barbara Elsborg would leave my heart full and happy at the end.
I really don’t think I have the words or the eloquence to tell you how this book touched my soul.
Fen and Ripley are individually “broken” in their own ways but together are perfect. Fen is quirky, sassy , cheerful and utterly intriguing. Ripley is the epitome of a person with repressed emotions who lives behind a carefully constructed mask leading a rather lonely life. Circumstances have them coming into each other’s lives, making agreements and falling in lust (featuring plenty of steam mixed with pure tenderness) before love captures their hearts.
The author weaves together a beautiful tale of romance and heartache with two strong complex characters that fight for their well deserved HEA. I laughed, sighed and cried my way through this utterly endearing and engaging read and just let the waves of emotions wash through me as I knew the story telling ability of Barbara Elsborg would leave my heart full and happy at the end.
August 9, 2024
4.5*
I loved how Fen stood up for himself when meeting Ripley and turned his world upside down. Yes, Ripley's proposition was a dick move to cheapen everything developing between them. But he realised soon enough that it didn't do anything to protect his heart from getting hurt. Instead of putting everything out there, they tiptoed around the elephant in the room, keeping secrets and caused a lot of hurt because of it. After the framing for theft by Scott, the neglect by his sperm donor and the accusations for leaking to the press, Fen really found happiness with Ripley. Together they started living again. Fen's wit, open and adventurous mindset is exactly what Ripley needed to break free from his stifling existence. This was only confirmed by the epilogue.
Definitely want to read more of this author even when I didn't find all aspects that believable.
I loved how Fen stood up for himself when meeting Ripley and turned his world upside down. Yes, Ripley's proposition was a dick move to cheapen everything developing between them. But he realised soon enough that it didn't do anything to protect his heart from getting hurt. Instead of putting everything out there, they tiptoed around the elephant in the room, keeping secrets and caused a lot of hurt because of it. After the framing for theft by Scott, the neglect by his sperm donor and the accusations for leaking to the press, Fen really found happiness with Ripley. Together they started living again. Fen's wit, open and adventurous mindset is exactly what Ripley needed to break free from his stifling existence. This was only confirmed by the epilogue.
Definitely want to read more of this author even when I didn't find all aspects that believable.
May 12, 2024
"Taking A Risk", which is the prequel to the book "Fen". "Fen" is a beautiful story about two men who have overcome great sadness in their lives, and how they find each other in the midst of it all. The main character, Fen, has gone through a lot of tough times, but he still manages to keep pushing forward.
Ripley needed Fen and their journey together is written beautifully, I couldn't stop ready as Barbara Elsborg’s writing drew me into Fen and Ripley’s lives from the beginning and how their story unfolds is amazing.
The book cover is awesome.
What a wonderful book that deserves more than five stars….
Ripley needed Fen and their journey together is written beautifully, I couldn't stop ready as Barbara Elsborg’s writing drew me into Fen and Ripley’s lives from the beginning and how their story unfolds is amazing.
The book cover is awesome.
What a wonderful book that deserves more than five stars….
April 10, 2024
Once I started, I abandoned everything I had to do and just kept reading.
Yes, Ms Elsborg has done it again. And dare I say, I might love Fen and Ripley more than almost any of her other characters. I say might, because there are so many contenders for my favourite book couple of hers.
Fen is quite broken. Ripley is, in my opinion, even more broken. And then they meet.
And that’s all I’ve got until I’ve slept on it, dried my eyes and allowed my tsunami of emotions to settle down.
Six stars. Fabulous. Read it.
Yes, Ms Elsborg has done it again. And dare I say, I might love Fen and Ripley more than almost any of her other characters. I say might, because there are so many contenders for my favourite book couple of hers.
Fen is quite broken. Ripley is, in my opinion, even more broken. And then they meet.
And that’s all I’ve got until I’ve slept on it, dried my eyes and allowed my tsunami of emotions to settle down.
Six stars. Fabulous. Read it.
May 17, 2024
❤️❤️❤️ loved!
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