Bad Nature

by Ariel Courage

Armed with a terminal diagnosis, a grudge, and a rental car, forty-year-old Hester sets out to fulfill her lifelong dream of killing her father in this brilliantly subversive and bleakly funny novel.

It’s Hester’s fortieth birthday when she’s diagnosed with terminal cancer, and she knows immediately what she must abandon her possessions and drive to California to kill her estranged father. With no friends or family tying her to the life she’s built in New York City, she quits her wildly lucrative job in corporate law and sets off. She hasn’t made it far when she runs into John, an environmental activist in need of a ride to different superfund sites across the United States. From five-star Midwestern hotels to cultish Southwestern compounds, the two slowly make their way across the country. But will the revelations they make along the way dissuade Hester from her final goal?

Ragingly singular and surprisingly moving, Bad Nature is a novel of stunning detours and twists until its final destination. Part road trip novel, part revenge tale, part a lament of our ongoing ecological crisis, it’s ultimately a deft examination of the indulgence of holding grudges, moral ambivalence, and the eternal possibility of redemption.

Genres: Fiction, Contemporary, Literary Fiction, Audiobook, Mystery, Road Trip, Adult

287 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 1, 2025

Reviews

[MagretFume · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love unhinged heroines on a quest for revenge. 

This 40 years old has no one and nothing to loose, after avoiding relationships all her life and being diagnosed with only a few months to live. 
I liked the roadtrip format, and it gave a good pacing. 

I also liked the dark humour and the great honesty the main character has about herself and her shortcomings. I listened to the audiobook version and the narrator was really great and helped me a lot to get invested in the characters and the story. It really made the story better in my opinion. 

It was original and interesting, but but thought it liked something for me for me to get really immersed into the story, even though I'm not sure what. 

Thank you Macmillan audio!

[Sunny Lu · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. Dark, brutal, and beautiful in such a depressing way. So unsettling and sometimes darkly humorous, with lots of beautiful but not overwrought writing throughout. I didn’t think a revenge plot cross country America road trip story could be this compelling without feeling cheap, but here we are!

[Janie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Honest to the raw meat of existence, this book kept me captivated until the bittersweet end. The characters are genuine, and their views of the world and their isolation make them unique, each fitting into their own place in the universe. Deep sadness and balls like iron are interspersed with comic relief, which balances the reader's emotions. I am greatly looking forward to more of this author's creative and down to the roots of being writing.

[kimberly · Rating 3 out of 5]

When our narrator—40-years-old, relationshipless, childless, without family—receives a cancer diagnosis that promises only six months to live, she quits her job, packs a bag, and sets out on the road with one extreme plan: kill her father. “I was always going to kill my father… I knew I was going to kill him the same way you know that sooner or later it’s going to rain.”

Strapped with a decades-long resentment and a gun, Hester heads west from New York City, picking up a straggler along the way, and the two journey together, each on a different mission.

This book was so wildly different from what I thought it would be. I had expected a soft, forlorn tale about a woman and her acrimonious but tender relationship to her father. What I got instead was a truly unhinged woman on a quest for revenge. This wasn’t just a revenge tale though and there is still a lot of heart within these pages. From the start, Hester is very bitter and cynical and dismal. Readers can choose to view this as annoying or darkly comedic. I connected with the latter but Hester’s cynicism can definitely be grating at times. However, I think this was a very intentional move from the author as readers witness Hester’s growth and development as the novel goes on.

Courage’s prose cuts sharp as she uses her characters to explore the ongoing climate crisis, disease, trauma, morality, nature versus nurture, and the power of connection. Bad Nature is a smart and poignant novel that will entice and excite a wide variety of readers.

Thank you Henry Holt and Company for the early copy in exchange for an honest review! Available Apr. 1 2025
*Quotes are pulled from an advanced reader copy and are subject to change prior to publication*

[Jillian B · Rating 5 out of 5]

When Hester is diagnosed with terminal breast cancer at the age of 40, she makes a promise to herself. She will track down her estranged father…and kill him.

Yeah, this is not a feel-good road trip book. It’s a bitingly witty dark comedy with a borderline sociopathic main character—and I absolutely ate it up. Hester experiences a tremendous amount of growth over the course of the book, but she never loses her edge. Her inner monologue is often unkind and always hilarious. While this book’s premise is dark, the reading experience was pure joy. I highly, highly recommend this one.

Thank you to the publisher for gifting me a physical copy.

[Summer · Rating 4 out of 5]

An unhinged middle-aged woman going on a revenge mission is my kind of jam!

Bad Nature is an original and unique work. The first half is more of a slower, character-driven work that introduces you to the characters, and the second half is more of a Thelma and Louise type of story.

Hester is such an unforgettable character! She’s
nihilistic, impulsive, and darkly funny. John is almost the opposite and his character perfectly balances Hester’s. I enjoyed the duo’s road trip through America

I was very impressed with Arial’s smart writing. I love how she brilliantly woven together this tale and how John’s environmental stops were metaphorical to Hester’s cancer. Even though Bad Nature is funny and entertaining, it’s not an easy read. It touches on many dark subjects, such as trauma and the climate crisis, as well as Human connection and the nature vs. nurture debate.

Bad Nature by Ariel Courage will be available on April 1. Many thanks to Henry Holt Books for the gifted copy!

[Melki · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was always going to kill my father.

There will be no heartwarming father and child reunion when Hester finally sees her dad again.

This was the plan: drive west, find Dad, kill Dad, then self.

Unless you believe that happiness is a warm gun.

I occasionally looked him up to confirm he was still alive and therefore killable.

Yes, Hester is pretty darned single-minded when it comes to her quest for vengeance.

I'd promised Mom to pursue happiness, but technically killing Dad would make me happy.

This is a strange road trip tale filled with strange bedfellows on strange missions. Despite the premise, and the above quotes, the novel is rather humorous, whimsical, almost, as Murphy's Law manages to keep tossing obstacles in the way of Hester's plans.

I mostly enjoyed the ride, though I was ready for the journey to end.

Thanks to NetGalley and Henry Holt and Co. for the read.

[Jodi C · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love a good "woman unleashes righteous vengeance on someone who wronged them" type of tale. That is what Bad Nature sets itself up to be as we start this journey.

Our potential vengeance unleasher, Hester, has just been told she has terminal breast cancer. She decides to quit her job, leave her old life behind, and set out on a cross-country road trip to kill her father.

Why does Hester want to kill her father? Well, I kept waiting to find out. The repetition of her desire to kill him was frequent, and yet there was only the hint here and there of what this father had done to deserve to die. It was so vague; I ended up suspecting that maybe Hester is just a bitch.

Hester picks up a travel companion, John, who is passionate about the environment and is on a mission to document Superfund sites across the country. This partnership was an interesting start to this book, and I was hoping for a Thelma and Louise type of thing.

The beginning of this road trip is where the book shines.

The second half of this story turned into Thelma and Louise… umm… Hester and John… visiting various Superfund sites and environmental concerns took center stage. It left me feeling a little lost trying to mesh the environment and its desecration to a revenge tale.

It just didn’t work for me in the way I started out thinking it would, and believe me when I tell you, I love the environment and weep for the wrongs perpetrated upon it. In the end, this felt like two different books meshed together. I liked both of them, just not at the same time.

Still a solid start from this author, and I hope to meet John again someday in a story of his own!

[jocelyn • coolgalreading · Rating 4 out of 5]

im in my women over 40 going through it era

[Ashley · Rating 3 out of 5]

(2.5/5, rounded up)
This started out so strong that it backfired. When I'd expect some sort of build up, we'd already plateaued. The tension that is built, then comes crumbling down anyway with that ending. I have never written and will never write a book so you'd think I'd have no room to talk- but unfortunately the task at hand is reviewing this book soo... That ending made me really aggravated, I spent all this time reading...for what? The premise is so strong, ugh.

This especially breaks my heart because narrator Cia Court is possibly my #1 fav. She did a great job as always.

{Thank you bunches to NetGalley, Ariel Courage, Macmillan Audio and Henry Holt & Company for the ALC in exchange for my honest review! PUB DATE: 4/1/25}

[Allen Richard · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you were terminally ill, what would you do with your last months? For our main character Hester, the answer is going on a road trip to kill her father.

I was hooked by the concept. I love a story of female rage and revenge. I was intrigued at the beginning of this novel by our main character, her motivations, and her interactions with other characters, but my intrigue waned through the first half. I wanted to know more about why Hester wanted to kill her father, and I felt we didn’t really get to see their relationship and her memories of childhood until halfway through. I appreciated the ending and was overall satisfied with the read, but I wanted more of the why throughout. 3.5

Thank you to NetGalley for an advance copy of this in exchange for an honest review.

[Andrea Gagne · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book and it's dark humor will definitely stay with me!

When forty-year-old Hester gets the news that she's terminally ill, she decides to set off on a cross-country road trip to kill her father. Embarking from NY to California with the goal of shooting him and then killing herself.

There is so much to unpack with this book. First, I have to say that the writing was incredible. Sharp, darkly witty, insightful, descriptive - this was a meticulously crafted novel with so much care and attention to detail.

The settings of small town America, seen through the eyes of a cynical dying New Yorker, were so visual and resonant. And the character development was so strong - Hester truly felt real in all her complexity. She is intentionally unlikeable, at times fully unhinged, but as you get to know and understand her more deeply, you can forgive her for that. It also helps that we also got to see her through the lens of her friendship with John, a hitchhiker she picks up who is a genuinely good person traveling the country photographing Superfund sites - locations in America that have been contaminated by toxic pollutants.

I thought the Superfund sites, which looked normal but were toxic right below the surface, were a poignant metaphor for the cancer spreading through Hester underneath her skin - and her refusal to cope with what was happening to her.

This is a dark book. I would stress that though there is a humor to the writing, it is not at all a light book. It also felt like the road trip was maybe a little slow at times - though I don't think I can really stand behind saying that, because every scene contributed to us getting to know Hester in one way or another a little more deeply.

Thank you to NetGalley and Henry Holt & Co for this ARC to read and review.

[Vartika · Rating 3 out of 5]

Driven more by anger than discernment and fervour than an actual agenda, out 40-year-old terminally ill protagonist sets across the country to exact revenge from the abusive father she hasn't seen or heard from in three decades.

What would killing him accomplish? Nothing, mostly. Then again, neither would letting him live.

This is one of the rare instances where I actually do see the comparisons with Ottessa Moshfegh (though these have come thus far only from the blurbers): Ariel Courage's Hester, like the unnamed narrator from My Year of Rest and Relaxation , is also a wealthy, detached, and attractive woman with no real relationships, friendly or otherwise; she too is supremely self-aware but not remotely soul-searching or reflexive, with a similarly acerbic wit, deep-set cynicism, and a dark sense of humour. This last bit is important because it is really what keeps us tethered to following the story of an otherwise frankly unlikable, unhinged character. 


Though Hester is determined to take her father out before her own time is up, her narrative doesn't dwell on the why. We are given brief glimpses into her relationship with her father and the trauma he left her mother with, but are largely spared the specifics of both past and future. Only the present exists, told in the form of a road trip with murder as its destination. A more pressing sense of 'the sins of the father' comes from John, a young, renegade environmental activist Hester runs into and bands with early into her journey. 


John is also travelling across the country, but towards different ends: he is in pursuit of contaminated 'superfund sites' where he hopes to document environmental crimes, occassionally also choosing to draw attention to them through acts of ecotage. He's a brilliant foil to his apolitical, dismal travelling companion, particularly since Hester used to be a lawyer defending some of the very forces he seeks to oppose. But while Courage does a decent job of underlining the seriousness of ecological destruction at hand – it here seems to advance in tandem with Hester's tumour, which she nicknames Beryl – and why a radical approach is crucial, I couldn't help but feel that her research into how someone like John might talk simply involved miming what radical ecological activists have been saying online, without adding more depth or insight. Still, John's recognition of a systemic fault and his approach to 'placing blame' is valuable in a genre whose readers may not be socio-politically engaged, and further serves to complicate the idea of both the classic road trip and the revenge story. Indeed, as Hester says

I don't know why revenge plots are so commonly accepted. These simple stories by the lazy and uninspired.

Bad Nature definitely has the briskness of a revenge thriller – I couldn't put it down – but it also meanders and goes into places such books normally don't with its ambiguity towards the point of acting on a long-held grudge. Courage is refreshingly brilliant at ensuring the reader can't guess her next move, but this is ultimately at some cost to the story's momentum. Unlike other early readers, I found the ending well-suited, but I did think that Hester's unravelling comes somewhat strangely: the scene in the barn feels somewhat inexplicably at odds with the writing elsewhere, as if it belongs in a different book. 


Overall, this is a commendable debut from a promising writer. I don't suspect it will hold up to the cult success of Ottessa Moshfegh's works, but do appreciate it for trying something new both within and outside that comparison, and for being as gripping as it was despite its imperfections.

[Stay Fetters · Rating 3 out of 5]

"I wish you’d stayed, I would’ve let you ruin my whole life."

If you received horrible news with only months to live, what would you want to do with the rest of your time on this earth? What you would do and what Hester wants to do are two different things but I like to believe that there is a little Hester in all of us.

Hester is the character we all love to hate. She has everything at her fingertips and always gets what she wants—until a diagnosis changes her life and shifts her perspective completely. This is where the story takes a wild turn. Hester becomes determined to kill the man who brought her into this world. In this situation, we listen and we don't judge.

I was really excited to read this book because it's not every day that you come across a story about someone wanting to take out a parent. The anticipation I felt was immense. However, that excitement was short-lived, as the book turned out to be a very slow read. Some parts were interesting, but not enough for me to devour the book as I had hoped.

'Bad Nature' was an okay read. More of a one-and-done type of book. While I had high hopes for this book, it just didn't impress me like I thought it would. Also, be leery of who you pick up from the roadside.

[bella · Rating 2 out of 5]

2 ⭐️
This was a pretty hard book to get though and now to review. For having such a strong premise, I was really excited to start this one, and very happy to receive it as an arc. Bu after only a few chapters, I knew it wasn't a book for me.

Bad Nature follows a woman who is diagnosed with terminal cancer on her fortieth birthday. Having nothing and no one tying her to her life in New York, she quits her job and decides to drive to California with one goal in mind: to kill her estranged father. But on her way to California, she picks up a hitchhiker ecoactivist and tags along on his missions.

There is nothing I love more than a scorned woman on a mission. Our main character, Hester, seems to be on a path of self-destruction as well as revenge. I found this book to be boring and hard to get through. It was monologue after monologue of Hester's extreme cynicism, and her constant pissing and moaning about the world and her past. I kept waiting for things to spin around and for Hester o have some self-reflection or possible redemption, but unfortunately that never happened. She only continued on this path with her hitchhiker, making pitstops to see people that played a role in her depressing life and joining this environmental warrior on his path. Everything they do turns out to be pointless in the end. No part of her journey led Hester do to anything but just double down on her original feelings and thoughts when the book began. When so many things happened in this book and there was so much leading up to the ending, it was incredibly unsatisfying to see no change whatsoever.

I felt like I was getting myself through this story and feeling zero emotions about what was happening. I can usually get behind an unlikable characters, but Hester purely horrible with no redeeming qualities or any character growth. I had to force myself to gt through this one and I really wish it had lived up to the exciting promise of the premise.

Thank you NetGalley, Ariel Courage, and Henry Holt and Company for the arc in exchange for an honest review.

[Jenna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ty to NetGalley and publishers for the ARC!

Read if you like...
Cancer stories
UNHINGED FMC
Adventure & road trips
Revenge plots

Wow, I feel like I need a minute after the last few chapters. This book has me up at 2 A.M., dying to finish it to see if Hester actually kills her dad or not (spoiler free review) While chasing l'appel du vide or what the French call: “the call of the void”.

This was absolutely gritty and dark and edge-of-your seat exciting.

Hester is a forty year old woman recently diagnosed with breast cancer, who sets out on a road trip to kill her dad and met an unexpected friend acquaintance along the way named "John". The author had to have done SO much research for John's character.

Hester was COMPLETELY freaking unhinged, and I was here for every minute of it. She was gritty, rude, impulsive, daring, dark and I really enjoyed seeing who she was through memories as well as on her road trip with John.

The only complaint I have is the ending, maybe. It kind of felt like the ending of a chapter and not a book.

I still loved reading this one. It was quite the wild ride!

[Kip Gire · Rating 3 out of 5]

A darker themed travel book based around an end of life vigilante adventure that tries for humor but comes up short. It's too dark to be funny, not funny enough to be ironic, but written well enough to keep you moving thru to the end. 

[Lizz · Rating 4 out of 5]

received ARC from netgalley ~

a book about a terminally ill woman with an estranged and volatile relationship with her father combined with a spontaneous cross-country roadtrip was immediately interesting to me.

the author’s writing style and the dark satire throughout the story really sets the tone for the strange end-of-life journey the protagonist finds herself on.

this is one of those books that kind of feel like an A24 film.

[Cynthia · Rating 3 out of 5]

I don’t expect a terminally ill character who is taking a road trip to murder her father to be likeable. But I think it’s fair to expect her to be amusing, or somewhat entertaining, at least. The narrator of Bad Nature was not that, though. In fact, I found Hester quite dull.

If not for John, the environmental activist she picks up on her journey, I might have rated this lower, but I did think he was an interesting character. Otherwise, I felt pretty indifferent to this story, although I liked the basic concept of making this the antithesis of a heartwarming journey (which we can find in plenty of other novels that would also probably bore me).

I am immensely grateful to Macmillan Audio for my copy. All opinions are my own.

[Jayna · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was expecting a dying woman making self discoveries on a road trip. There was a little of that, but I feel the environmental plot line overshadowed it. There was far too much of that. I was disappointed. And bored through most of the book. Definitely not for me- and maybe part of the problem was my expectations.

Cia Court narrates. I really have nothing to say- I was too busy hoping the book would get better.

I received an advance audio copy in exchange for an honest review.

[akacya ❦ · Rating 3 out of 5]

2025 reads: 106/300

i received a complimentary audio copy from the publisher as part of their influencer program. this did not affect my rating.

content warnings: cancer, suicidal ideation, domestic abuse, murder, death of parent

on her fortieth birthday, hester receives a terminal cancer diagnosis. she promptly quits her job and leaves new york city, heading toward where her father lives in california. hester’s diagnosis has finally given her the opportunity to do what she’s always wanted to do: kill her father.

this book’s plot summary was so interesting, i just had to give this a try. i enjoyed how the story unfolded, from the present road trip to the previous events that led hester to this point. there was also a lot of discussions regarding the climate crisis, which i didn’t expect going in, but appreciated. with all that said, this book was just okay to me. it didn’t quite captivate me as much as i’d hoped. still, i would be interested in looking into whatever’s next from ariel courage.

narration: cia court narrated this audiobook, and i found myself better immersed into the story thanks to her narration. i’d recommend the audiobook to those interested in this story.

[Christina | readingthroughatlanta · Rating 3 out of 5]

A woman sets out to kill her estranged father after being diagnosed with terminal cancer.

The blurb initially pulled me into this one immediately. The execution is where it lost me a bit.

Firstly, the main character is unlikable. She is intense, and there's no real growth, but I can appreciate how self aware she is about herself and her shortcoming but also not. She is relatively successful, but has no one and is broken in some regards. And the life she's lived thus far and this journey speaks to her destructive nature, utter sadness, and the foolishness she gets involved in. But it does make it hard to empathize at times.

Ultimately, this is a road trip book. The cross country road trip slows down the pace a bit with the mishaps and flashbacks that took me out of the store a bit. Stolen cars, self aware ex boyfriends, hitch hikers, and random hooks made for some funny moments, but also felt sometimes felt out of place. And like girl you're dying?? Have a sense of urgency??

The ending was unexpected but slightly rushed and I don't know if we leave her better than we found her...

Thank you to the publisher for my ALC in exchange for my honest review.

[Megan Rang · Rating 5 out of 5]

*****I received this free audiobook from NetGalley and the publisher for my honest review.

When faced with the knowledge of having been diagnosed with an incurable cancer with only a short time to life Hester decides she has had enough. All her adult life she has despised her father. He beat her mother and ruined her childhood shaping her into the woman she has become. She goes on a journey intent on ending her father’s life before the cancer can take hers.

[Daniel · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

A strange, terse road trip story told by a woman who, after receiving a terminal cancer diagnosis, decides to drive across the country to kill her abusive, estranged father.

Hester is a liability in so many ways: she does not feel regret, nor does she spend time investing in people or their feelings. She's a highly-paid defence attorney at a large corporate law firm with few friends and no romantic entanglements. Everything is once removed, abstracted, so she can better cope with the traumas she experienced at the hands of her father as a child.

The story begins at a terminal cancer diagnosis and a decision to take out her dad before she herself parts this life. On the road she meets a cavalcade of interesting characters, including John, a so-called eco-activist, and they form something of a maternal bond (the less I say about this the better, though; it's one of the best parts of the book). Through John we discover the parallel message told in Bad Nature about climate change and the government's neglect of the environment.

Hester's narrative is told in the first person but at a remove, and it's difficult to trust her or what she sees. While she's not a likeable protagonist in the traditional sense, Courage writes her with plenty of empathy, and that comes across as we read it. She may not be likeable, but we understand how she arrived at her place, and her difficult decision, and we respect it.

A solid first effort.

[Kerstin | mommyandme.bookclub]

Thank you Macmillan Audio and Henry Holt for the gifted copies.

Unfortunately, I DNF at 19%.

This felt so flat to me. I tandem listened to the audio while reading a physical copy, and I just could not bring myself to connect or really care for the MC.

[Quinty · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5⭐️ “Let’s go on a roadtrip and kill my dad.” Count me in.

[PhattandyPDX · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hester’s journey across the contemporary USA involves being propositioned for oral sex from a drug addict living with incapacitated grandparents, traveling with a monkey-wrenching hitchhiker, and dropping in unannounced to people she has not seen in over 20 years. The desperate American message celebrating god and steeped in poverty is seen on billboards through multiple towns.

“The harshness of the landscape accelerated the aging of the people who lived in it, fraying everyone like rope. John had me stop to take pictures of sinkholes that had formed near abandoned oil fields. The place seemed afflicted with a lack of belief… faith in God, but skepticism for everything else.”

It’s a journey through her own personal heart of darkness as she travels to have a reckoning with her father. This book was really well written and engrossing; Hester reminded me of Captain Willard in Apocalypse Now: “Never get out of the boat; absolutely god damn right, unless you are going all the way.”

Can’t wait to read more from this writer.

[Ananya T · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book attempts to be a deep and insightful look at the unpredictability of the human experience but fails miserably. I was actually quite willing to look over the whole “cold-hearted bitch” copy paste archetype due to the multitude of complex characters, but as it progressed, the main character seemed to lose the edge that made her interesting in the first place (read: woman becomes soft, because that’s the only method of female character development).

I also was just frustrated with the plethora of random twists at the end (some sort of nod to life’s unpredictability? I don’t know. Weird.) which just made me angry. So now I’m writing this review, and I’m going to emphasize the people who read novels like this and term them “true insight into the human mind” or some garbage are Colleen Hoover enjoyers and should not be allowed to review books.

[Poppy✨ · Rating 3 out of 5]

There isn’t much to say for me about this. This book is ok, it’s one of those books people describe as dark and twisted. I don’t really know if it packed the punch it wanted to for me. I found her insufferable at times, not redeeming in the way I think the author wanted her to be. I think it had a lot to say about childhood, relationships and also climate change. The climate change thing didn’t really add anything for me. I’m sure it’s really poignant for others. I think the ending is lacklustre and it squanders all the good buildup for it to deflate. Hester deserved some bang.

[Myranda Hoffman · Rating 4 out of 5]

An unhinged female on a mission💥