New Zealand with a Hobbit Botherer

by John Gisby, Annette Gisby

What should you do if your spouse becomes addicted to the Lord of the Rings movies and swoons at the very mention of Orlando Bloom's name? (Thud. Quick, fetch the smelling salts.) How about taking the advice of a strange apparition that reveals itself in a dream? An apparition that looks remarkably like the director of the movies, Peter Jackson, but not quite remarkably enough to prompt legal action. An apparition that recommends touring New Zealand in an effort to prove that its sheep pastures aren't really filled by frolicking Hobbits. Just sheep and the occasional zorbing local. This is the hilarious tale of such a tour, featuring snow capped mountains and turquoise lakes, flightless birds and flying cattle, bungy jumping grannies and the carrot mafia, strange yellow eyes peering up from a road map and hotel receptionists always desperate to know "win you are living."

Genres: Travel, Nonfiction, Humor

253 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2006

Reviews

[Majanka · Rating 4 out of 5]

’ve never been to New Zealand before, but it’s one of my favorite must-see places, next to Egypt and China. So when I got the chance to read New Zealand with a Hobbit Botherer, which combines two of my favorite things, New Zealand and Lord of the Rings, I had to read it. The book is well out of my comfort zone: it’s the first travel book I’ve read to date. But I enjoyed reading it, and I might try out a few more travel books in the future. John and Annette have a quirky, intriguing writing style that hops from humorous to serious in a light-hearted way. It engaged me from the first page. I was afraid the book would be a dry ramble of everything that happened while they were visiting New Zealand, but I was completely wrong. It’s the voice that makes the book interesting and a pleasure to read.

But what also interested me was the locations they visited. They went from north to south during their journey, visiting all places related to Lord of the Rings and several other memorable spots. I loved the almost-constant references to Lord of the Rings, because those would be the kind of places I would want to see as well, from the spot where they walk on mountains during the movie to where they filmed parts of it, to the hobbit towns. The authors use vivid, detailed descriptions to paint the settings, all the while without losing their original, humorous voice.

I loved the chapter titles as well. They were original and fun. One of the chapters was titled “New Zealand’s G-spot” which made me laugh out loud. But the best title goes to the glossary at the end, “For People Who Think Lord of the Rings is an Artistic Jeweller”. I also liked how John kept referring to his wife, Annette, co-author of the book, as “The Hobbit Botherer”. It’s a great term for Lord of the Rings fanatics.

If you love New Zealand and/or hobbits, Orlando Blooom (although I personally admit I found him way hotter in the Three Musketeers than in Lord of the Rings) or any other character or actor of LOTR, then give this book a try. It made me wish I had enough funds to travel to New Zealand right away, but alas. But it was fun to travel there while reading, even if it’s not the real thing.

[Sally906 · Rating 3 out of 5]

John Gisby took his wife Annette (aka the Hobbit Botherer) to New Zealand to visit many of the places that were used for the settings in the ‘Lord of the Rings’ movies. I came across the book when doing an online search for books set in New Zealand to read before our holiday there – and as I have seen all 3 movies and swoon at the very mention of Orlando Bloom I got myself a copy. The Gisby’s started on the north island and then moved onto the south. We were only going to visit the south island but had visited the north island a few years back so thought I could do with a armchair trip down memory lane for the north, and maybe pick up some hints for places to see on the south.

Being an Australian it was great fun to see what the Brits thought of a country that is almost more British than the Brits. New Zealanders are a warm and welcoming bunch of people and there are many, many beautiful places to see and visit in the land of the long white cloud.

On the whole I enjoyed reading about the travel adventures of the Gisby’s, however, there are two main areas where I disagree with author John Gisby, firstly I don’t understand the problem he had with carrots – we have each had homemade pies in 3 different parts of the country and found no carrots whatever, the impression Gisby gave was that everything had carrots in it, mind you we are here now in winter, they were there in summer – maybe carrots are a summer vegetable? Secondly, we also have eaten the odd sausage and cannot understand his other constant complaint that New Zealanders can’t produce a decent sausage, ours have all been yummy and no there were no carrots with my sausages either. Maybe Australians have no taste either?

All that aside, NEW ZEALAND WITH A HOBBIT BOTHERER, is a very funny book most of the time, and a bit off the planet at other times, such as the strange little imaginary man Gisby keeps having conversations with – funny at first then just got plain weird. Even if you are not a ‘Lord of the Rings’ fan then this travel adventure is full of good information of sites to see and to avoid.

[Tami · Rating 5 out of 5]

Are you a Hobbit Botherer? Have you seen all three Lord of the Rings movies multiple times? Do you involuntarily scream "He's so hot!" when Orlando Bloom appears on the television set? Have you had fantasies about visiting Hobbiton, fighting a fierce band of Uruk-hai, or receiving a magical ring? Do you have a growing collection of DVDs starring Orlando Bloom, Viggo Mortenson, Sean Astin, and Elijah Wood? If so, you might be a Hobbit Botherer.

New Zealand with a Hobbit Botherer is the tale of the author as he tries to have a normal vacation in New Zealand with his Hobbit Botherer wife. As the couple enjoys the beautiful sights and rich culture of New Zealand, the author finds himself being dragged to old set locations, places where Elijah stood, and a variety of commercial venues using the Lord of the Rings related themes. The result is hilarious.

New Zealand with a Hobbit Botherer was a complete breath of fresh air. I laughed so hard, I could hardly breathe. Moreover, though I have always wanted to go to New Zealand, now I yearn to do so.

I have just one more thing to say to the author. We Hobbit Botherers know you are laughing at us about our infatuation but we really don't care. We are far too busy daydreaming about the track that the crew followed on their journey. Moreover, the sooner you realize that Hobbiton truly exists (you did find remnants didn't you?), the happier your life will be:).

[Dorothy Emry · Rating 3 out of 5]

Much of the fun in this book, for me, came from the fact that I got to view Kiwis through the eyes of the Brit author.

Though a bit slow in parts, Gisby gives a good overview of what it's like to drive around New Zealand's two islands. Very helpful in giving a heads up on the LOTR sights that are most enjoyable, as well as giving a glimpse of non-LOTR sights that are worth the trip.

The real gem of the book is the glossary "For People Who Think Lord Of The Rings Is An Aristocratic Jeweller," which contains fun definitions such as: "warg - A big ferocious hairy creature ridden into battle by Orcs, not to be confused with the small hairy creature called Gimli."

[Sheila · Rating 4 out of 5]

An amusing and useful account of a whistle-stop tour of New Zealand (mostly South Island).

[Nicole Normand · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book discounted on Amazon; this is my honest review
-I enjoyed every minute of this book. I didn’t notice I had Tolkien’s bio too (read and reviewed on this website Wyatt North J.R.R. Tolkien: A Life Inspired) so both together made a great pair. I was able to understand and “see” a lot from the books, and it was a fun ride. The vocabulary is totally Tolkien (Elves, Wizards, Hobbits, Uruk-hai, Orcs, Rangers, Dwarves, Rohirrim ...). Gisby also explain where they are in NZ compared to the books "This is the desolate and rocky place where...".
-Confession: I never read any of Tolkien's books or watched the movies but my brothers and my husband did - they're from a different generation and I was intrigued.
-I was only at 5% but I laughed at each paragraph - great start. The author has a great sense of humor and let's not forget all the side comments like he's telling you a secret. OMG - all those double entendre... Naughty.
-New Zealand's national obsession is interesting and we'll hear about it all through the book. I did not take offense when Gisby thought all Americans would give less than a week to visit a whole country. I'm from Canada and I'd like to think I'd take more time to visit and enjoy.
-Loved the bits about history facts; they were engaging and I love history.
-29% "How far did you get before you realised I was joking?" I believed every word you said!
-After that one above, I didn't know if this one was true but I don't care, it the context it's super funny: "secures the Colt at the side of the road, in between a Bronco and a Pony".
-Editing needs a serious pass. Frankly I didn't take off a star like I usually do - this is how much I enjoyed the book. Unfortunately, I don't know how to reach the author so I can't give him my list.

[Ali · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wanted to enjoy this more than I actually did, at times it was very funny at others the humour fell flat for me. Clever and often very on the point commentary about New Zealand but there was something about the style of writing that didn't work for me.

[Jane · Rating 4 out of 5]

An enjoyable light hearted account of touring New Zealand and being a Hobbit fan.

[Gita Madhu · Rating 3 out of 5]

I joined Story Cartel some months back, emboldened by the concept of Goodreads giveaways. Free books arriving fast and furious at my doorstep and relocation to a library friendly city had aroused greed. Some random surfing brought me to Story Cartel.

For months, common sense prevailed over a Smaug like desire to hoard all the freebies and I struggled to read a page here and a chapter there from a pile of books in both French and English. Story Cartel sought in vain to entice me with various Weekend lures but to no avail.

Until the lures turned more promising one fine day and with the chance to win a free kindle, I set forth to trudge through the amazing variety of books –free for reviewers.

And there I found this gem: New Zealand with a Hobbit Botherer by John Gisby and starring Annette Gisby as THB. A gem to me as I was once a hard core Lord of the Rings fan, spending the time of the day debating with the likeminded over various trivia such as “Did Gandalf really die when he fought the Balrog?”

I must admit I was a tad disappointed because this book is not for the above kind of fanatic so much as for the movie version fruit cakes. Still, there are overlaps which will do quite well, thank you very much.

Told with extremely warm humour, this is the tale of man who takes his wife, a Hobbit Botherer, to New Zealand to visit the locations of the film. A few lines from the book illustrate the kind of man he surely must be:

At this point Mark returned with a tall Belgian backpacker called Maya who folded herself into the 4WD’s back seat behind us. Maya’s boyfriend was paying for her to travel around the world without him. (At this point my female readership sighs wistfully and asks “Where can I find a boyfriend like that?” My male readership nods world-wearily and says “Yeah, I’ve had girlfriends like that.”)

And this seems exactly what John Gisby has done for his missus.

As the deadline for reviewing the book galloped towards me I did what I normally (as in always) do with books. I skipped to the end. And it was most unsettling! Rather like that thing that sometimes happens when you ask the mighty I Ching the same question again on the same day. Almost as bad as what it says when you ask the question for the third time. This is what I read there:

A final thought.

THB has a friend called Kyp who loves to read the end of a book first to get an idea if it is worth bothering with the rest. I don’t know if she’ll ever get around to reading this one, but just in case she does...

Hello Kyp. You should see what I said about you earlier on in the book.

She’ll have to read it now.

I thought that was eerily cute!

As if the wry and highly entertaining style were not enough, the author splatters sheep jokes for the unwary reader:

Do you want another sheep joke? All right, a quick one.

A farmer drops his watch into the sheep dip and when he retrieves it he finds it is no longer working. No ticks.

This is not the best of them but it may be the cleanest. New Zealand with a Hobbit Botherer is for those who do not fear breaking into a loud guffaw.

Now that I have laid the ground, let me proceed to tell you about this entertaining book. An almost travelogue about New Zealand, you need not be a diehard fan of Peter Jackson’s film or Tolkien’s book to enjoy the descriptions of what seems to have been a fabulous holiday.

When I began the book I thought: "The author might consider adding a glossary. My knowledge of British slang is growing with each page”. Imagine my surprise when I flipped to the end to find a fine glossary there-albeit one that is “For People Who Think Lord Of The Rings Is An Aristocratic Jeweller.”

Still, having to run to the Urban Dictionary every odd line or so was not as bothersome as all that considering the chuckles the writing excites every line or so. For example :

"This turned out to be more productive then dreaming of Lord of the Rings parties as he eventually designed and built an aquarium with a walk-through acrylic tunnel, the sides and roof of which allowed sharks, stingrays and a host of other sea creatures to be viewed. All that was missing really was a waiter to arrange for the one that you selected to be cooked and brought to a candlelit table."

And this is a good description of the book for it has all you ever need to know about New Zealand if you are a Hobbit Botherer. And if you aren’t then this book will do that for you, to you. It will turn you into a Hobbit Botherer and it will compel you to visit New Zealand.

[Lynn · Rating 1 out of 5]

This author has an amazing sense of humor, was nothing that I thought I would find. There was a drastic language barrier in trying to read this ---- did not enjoy at all and was just delighted when I finally finished the tale! I would not recommend to anyone I know! But was very thankful when I finished it!