"It took two decades, but I wouldn’t change a single thing."
This was my first Elizabeth O’Roark book. Based on this one, I want to go back and read everything she’s ever written.
This book will break your heart, but the ending will ease the pain.
"The same boy who was consistently kind to me at a point in my life when no one else was. He doesn’t scare me, even if he should."
Caleb is an asshole CEO who doesn’t seem to really care about anything other than advancing his company. He’s a workaholic. He’s so far up his own ass that he doesn’t want or need a woman—why would he, anyway? He’s had enough of that.
On the inside, though? He’s a wonderful, broken man.
"Yeah, Lucie, I definitely saw. You grew up. Jesus, did you grow up. And I need to know why I suddenly can’t seem to get away from you."
Lucie was too close to me—I just don’t have kids. She married a guy who was supposed to love and care for her, until he didn’t. Her ex made her feel worthless, and it will take strength and courage to go back to who she was. In the meantime, she has two wonderful kids who depend on her. And she’s not going to let them down.
"Who are you, Caleb Lowell? What happened to the boy you once were? Because it sort of seems like one of us should be trying to find him."
They’d met before, when Lucie lived in the house beside Caleb’s. She watched him from afar, wondering if he could ever be her prince charming. Wishing for it. But the chance never came, and they went their separate ways. Now, fate is throwing them a bone.
"Every time I see her, I want to see her again, and every time she smiles, I want to be the one who put that smile there."
Lucie is alone with her kids. She left her husband, doesn’t have a job, and is trying to do what’s best for them. They come first. The only thing she’s got is her aunt’s house, where she used to live as a kid. Where she used to see Caleb. But that was in another lifetime, and she needs to focus on the present.
Which is why it’s… complicated when she realizes he’s her new boss. And her neighbor. Again.
"Why are you so sure I won’t make a difference?"
"I just am. Take the next two weeks to job hunt. You can even stay three if you must."
Gone is the kind boy she knew. In his place is a real asshole who doesn’t care if she’s there—in fact, he wants her gone ASAP. It’s not that he thinks she’s useless or not able to do her job. He’s the one who may not be able to resist having her this close.
"I thought men cared about other things a lot more than smiles."
"I’m pretty sure they care about lots of things. You’re not lacking any of them."
Lucie doesn’t give up. She feels like she wants to at times (and that was so real), but she can’t. So she tries, she learns, she deals with whatever is thrown at her. She actually excels at a job she was sure she wouldn’t know how to do. But it’s her empathy that makes her an asset.
It’s her kind heart that starts making a dent in the walls Caleb’s erected around himself.
"Because you don’t want candlelight and rose petals, though you clearly think you do. You want someone so fucking eager to be inside you that he can’t wait long enough to take you home, to light those candles or scatter rose petals."
And Caleb? It’s annoying for him to have her around all the time. At the office, at home. He doesn’t want her, or her kids, close. Because it’s easier when no one depends on you. When no one loves you. Then you can fuck up all you want, and it’s fine.
But her small family starts coming closer, and you start seeing a side of Caleb he doesn’t usually show.
"Lucie," he says, his voice a low growl, "be very careful with what you say to me. I have a lot less self-control than you think."
Lucie hasn’t been with a lot of men in her life, and she feels… inadequate. But she wants him. She’s always wanted him, even before she truly knew what it meant. So when they start getting too close, the tension is EVERYTHING!
I was squealing when it finally happened!
"I wasn’t broken, some stunned voice in my head whispers. I was never broken. It was just never like this."
So many things are going on at the same time. Her ex doesn't let up, and I wanted to punch him so many times. Caleb is still unwilling to let people get too close, and his company is going through tough times, so he needs to work more. And Lucie wants the fairy tale—after the nightmare, she wants to be wanted, she wants someone who can be there for her and the kids, who can put them first. Because they’re a package deal. And anyone who wants to be with her better not forget that.
"You think I don’t know which room is yours? My day doesn’t end until I see your bedroom light go out."
There’s so much feeling in this book, and that’s what got to me. The villain here is life. Life pushes you around, hurts you, makes you feel less than and inadequate. Life tells you you can never be happy, and you can never make someone happy.
If you can’t truly be who someone needs, why bother?
"We have everything in common. Fucking everything that matters."
I can tell you right now that Caleb messes up. Big time. But I couldn’t fault him for it because… damn it, there was one specific scene that got me bawling. No spoilers. But you’ll know what it is when you get there, and if you don’t understand and/or love the man after you read it, you never will.
"It turns out what means everything was sitting next door, waiting for me."
They care about each other deeply, maybe more than they realize, and that’s heartbreaking. Because you see it even when they don’t. But they’ll need to face their demons. They need to take a leap and realize this is the right timing for them.
"ICWTMY"
"ICWTSY"
Sometimes you think you want a fairy tale when you actually want something—someone—who is very real. They both needed to belong, not to a place, but to someone. And when push comes to shove, this was the summer they saved each other.