Mom and Mum Are Getting Married!

by Ken Setterington, Alice Priestley (Illustrator)

When Rosie comes home to find her mom dancing alone in the living room—on a school day—she knows something wonderful is about to happen. So when one of her two mothers announces, "Your Mum and I are getting married!" they can't wait to start planning the big day. At this party, family, friends and fun come together for a joyous celebration of love in a changing world.

Genres: Picture Books, LGBT, Childrens, Queer, Fiction, Banned Books, Realistic Fiction

24 pages, Hardcover

First published September 30, 2004

Reviews

[Morris · Rating 4 out of 5]

It’s so wonderful to see a book about same-sex marriage that presents it to children as absolutely nothing other than a regular wedding… which it is. There are no judgmental family members and it’s a regular party after the simple wedding. Be aware that it is a bit wordy for a picture book so take that in consideration for your child’s attention span.

This unbiased review is based upon a complimentary copy provided by the publisher.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

'Mom and Mum are Getting Married', as expected from the title, is a story about a little girl whose two mothers are getting married. This book does a great job of normalising same sex relationships, as all Rosie is concnered about is whether she will have a role in the wedding, either as a flower girl or carrying the rings. I thought it was brilliant that this was the only focus, with no question of the fact that two mothers are getting married - exactly as it should be. The illustrations in this book are beautiful, done in such a way to look as if they've been done using colouring pencils. There are full page pictures which are fab, and white pages featuring the text. The text is well-spaced out with bits of dialogue made obvious, which makes it a good book for young readers that are just beginning to try out longer books. An all round 5-star book.

[Abigail · Rating 3 out of 5]

Coming home from school one day, Rosie discovers her mother dancing around the living room in pure joy, and learns that her Mom and Mum are getting married. As Rosie angles for a role in the wedding - bridesmaid? flower-girl? ring-bearer? - Mum makes it clear to an excited Nona and Pop that the two women just want a quiet, simple ceremony. Then the big day comes, and there is a mix-up with the rings! Luckily, Rosie and Uncle Peter are there to save the day...

Although I agree with some of my fellow reviewers in finding the narrative of Mom and Mum Are Getting Married somewhat stiff, my overall impressions were positive. I liked the fact that Mom and Mum's single-sex relationship was presented in a normal and matter-of-fact way, rather than as a problem or issue. As someone who supports the marriage rights of gay and lesbian people, it goes without saying that I approved of the storyline itself. I also really appreciated the subtle way that Setterington highlighted the common experiences of all couples (and their families) when involved in a wedding: the conflicts (very mild here) with parents about the type of ceremony to have, the role of young relatives, and the almost catastrophes of the day itself. Finally, I found Alice Priestley's illustrations very appealing, particularly the two-page spread at the end, where everyone is blowing bubbles!

There's nothing earth-shattering here, but as one of only a handful of books that sends a positive message about same-sex parents, marriage, and families, I highly recommend it to all!

[Carla · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a story about a little girl whose two mothers are getting married. I loved that this book makes this a normal situation and the daughter, Rosie, is only concerned about whether or not she can be a flower girl in the wedding. There are no judgmental characters or anyone that questions this as anything other than two people in love with children getting married. Rosie is a smart little girl and manages to convince her mom and mum that she and her brother can carry the rings and drop petals without any problems. The illustrations in this book are beautiful, done in such a way to look as if they've been done using coloured or watercolour pencils. There are full page pictures white pages featuring the text. The text is well-spaced out with bits of dialogue made obvious, which makes it a good book for young readers that are just beginning to try out longer books. There is a lot of text on some of the pages, but it should still hold the interest of children ages 4 and up. This would be a great book to read to children when they are learning about different types of families. The publisher generously provided me with a copy of this book via Netgalley.

[Ryan · Rating 2 out of 5]

A simple story of a little girl helping her mothers get married. The story was lovely. I hate the illustrations. They feel like and 80’s after school special. The book looks dated, and not the timely needed topic it is.

[Juso · Rating 4 out of 5]

This nonfiction narrative tells a story about a little girl, Rosie, who has two mothers, Mom and Mum, and a step-brother named Jack. Mom tells Rosie that her and Mum want to get married and have a small wedding. With persistence and determination, Rosie sets her sights on being the flower girl and the ring bearer, with Mom eventually allowing her to be the flower girl and ring bearer ("Well, maybe when you're carrying the rings, you could scatter a few petals, too"). As a literacy teacher, I would use this text in my classroom to teach about persuasion (ex."Why did the flower girl ride her bike to the wedding?...Because they needed lots of pedals. Get it? Pedals, petals"). The students could interact with the text by having them write about their personal experiences when they have had to use persuasion. I can appreciate the author, Ken Setterington, because as a gay male, living with a partner, he adds genuineness to the narrative. Throughout the story, the illustrator, Alice Priestley, does a great job of showing expressive emotions in her characters. The narrative depicts a diverse family that is composed of two mothers and their two kids.

[Sarah Perry · Rating 4 out of 5]

Rosie is so excited to find out her Mom and Mum will be getting married soon! She starts to wonder, what will it be like to be flower girl? What will her little brother Jack be doing in the wedding? What kind of dress will she get to wear?

This book celebrates the love between two people, no matter what their gender, and their families. This story follows Rosie and her family as they prepare for a small ceremony, and welcome their guests on their extra special day!

I found this book to be well-written, with soft, simple illustrations. It was the perfect, age-appropriate way to introduce my daughter to same sex couples. This is one that she reaches for every once in a while for bedtime, and I look forward to it gaining a deeper meaning as she grows older.

I received a copy of this book for review purposes. Opinions are honest and my own.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

My longtime partner (now wife) got married this past June. My daughter lives up in Vancouver, BC (Canada), and when she went through customs, they asked her why she was traveling. She explained that she was going to her moms' wedding. That seemed like an odd answer, so they asked her if she didn't think that was odd. She said that it had only become legal a year or so ago, so no, it wasn't odd.

I guess my point is that people seem to forget that Lesbian and Gay marriage only became legal about a year or so ago, in the United States, and only legal in Canada, in 2005, around the time this book was first published. That kids have grown up with parents that couldn't get legally married until they, the kids, were older, or completely grown up, as my daughter is.

And the reason I bring this up, is that, like all books, it is important to have books that show kids that what they are going through is normal. That is normal to have your mom and mum get married later in your life. That it is normal to have friends and family celebrate with you. And that it is normal to celebrate with your parents as they get married.

Back when my daughter was born, there were very few LGBTQ books out there, and the ones that were out there were not very good. I would change pronouns in books, such Home for a Bunny so that I could have a few LGBTQ books that weren't there.

So, this book is cute, normal, and I am hoping that kids who have lesbian and gay parents will take to it, and see themselves, and know that there are others out there like them.

Thanks to Netgalley for making this book available for an honest review.

[Jaimie · Rating 5 out of 5]

The protagonist in this story are the woman that are getting married. The antagonists are the children who must carry the rings. I loved this book because it shows a normal rainbow family and their journey to get married. This book would related to students in rainbow families. The illustrations are kind of old looking. I would use this for students at any age. The controversy is homophobic individuals. This is why it is hard for teachers to just place these in a library. Uneducated students may make a big deal out of it, some religious people see it as a sin, and I am just trying to educate well-rounded students.

[Dominika Romano · Rating 4 out of 5]

When Rosie finds out her two moms are getting married she really wants to be apart of the wedding in some way. When she finds out Mom wants a small wedding without the traditional components Rosie is disappointed but still determined. Her and Jack practice carrying rings and scattering flowers to ensure her moms have a special day. Perhaps Mom and Mum will let her be apart of the wedding!? What a special story!

[AmandaF · Rating 5 out of 5]

When Rosie finds out that her mothers are planning on getting married instead of being worried about what society or her friends might think, she is more worried about how she could help. Throughout the story, it takes the readers through different phases of throwing flower petals, carryings the rings, couple kissing, and braiding hair. This book is a great share of the LGBTQ community as it can impact many readers.

[Donna Maguire · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book will be ideal for families that have two moms or mums. It is a cute story about a little girl who really wants to be a flower girl at the wedding - I did find the idea that the focus of the book is on her wanting to be the flower girl and not the same sex marriage to be a great touch - the illustrations were ok but the book looks a bit dated from them - 3 stars

[Hope · Rating 4 out of 5]

What I think is great about this book is that, though the people getting married are both women, the focus is far more on the preparations for the wedding, and their children figuring out how to be a part of the ceremony. It shows a healthy, established relationship, and centers around a major time in that relationship. A great book, I enjoyed reading it.

[Emilie Liebert · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a bit longer, so it may be best suited for the older children. However, it's a story about a girl named Rosie attending her two mothers' wedding! It's a beautiful wedding, and everyone is happy for Rosie's family. It's a way to introduce same-sex marriage without the kids even realizing it. The illustrations are very realistic.

[Sirah · Rating 4 out of 5]

When Rosie's moms announce that they're having a wedding, Rosie really wants to be a bridesmaid, but it looks like the parents just want a little family gathering, not a fancy ceremony. Rosie is at first sad, but she finds ways to make the day special.

This book has a lot of text and a fun plot. I found the illustrations a bit uncanny, but I can still appreciate the concepts and joy.

[Dana · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a cute, simple picture book about a little girl who wants to be the flower girl in her parent's wedding. The book focuses on her involvement in the wedding, not on the fact that she has two moms.

[Cat · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kids who have two moms will appreciate this book! Cute story of a little girl who wants badly to be a flower girl at her two moms wedding. Illustrations were pretty and detailed.

[Andrea · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is so nice to see more and more children's books like this. It is lovely written but the illustrations feel a bit dated.

[Annburnett · Rating 4 out of 5]

It is a book showing love is love in this new world.

[Amy Nickolay · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mum and Mom are Getting Married is about a little girl who is excited to be a flower girl in her mother’s wedding. The book follows her thought process up until the day of the wedding, going through the details of planning, ring bearers, sharing the news with her grandparents and more. While at first her mother is hesitant to give her a major role in the wedding because of the great responsibility, the main character proves herself in a very creative way, leading the wedding to go very smoothly. The book does an excellent job of relaying a theme of normalcy despite the wedding being with two women instead of a man and a woman. Personally, I really appreciate this theme. Although my religious beliefs may or may not support alternative lifestyles, I value tolerance and acceptance a great deal. This book pushes no motives, it simply tells a wedding story through a child’s eyes, not highlighting anything different about the participants of the wedding. I think this would be a really good way of introducing kids to this topic, because it is so subtle, it would hopefully lead to a more blanket acceptance without too much controversy.

[Ms. D · Rating 2 out of 5]

This story is about a girl’s mothers getting married. This story is impressive in that the couple is accepted for who they are, and the relationship is seen as commonplace. The author does not make a big deal out of a lesbian couple having children and getting married. I think this is beneficial to expose children to different lifestyles at a young age because that way they will become used to these things, and this is exactly what this book can do.
The only thing I would criticize about this book is that the story is actually a little boring. However, I think a teacher could use this book simply by having it in the classroom library. As I said, exposing kids to different lifestyles is important. The teacher could have a little display with books about different types of families (i.e. divorce, gay couples, adopted children, children who live with their grandparents, etc.) set up to get the student’s attention about these families.

[Michelle Marcano · Rating 4 out of 5]

Setterington, Ken. Mom and Mum Are Getting Married. Toronto, Ontario, Canada: Second Story, 2005.

Subgroup: same sex parents

Genre: non fiction

Topic: Families, Same sex parents

Synopsis: This narrative tells the story about a little girl, Rosie, who has two mothers, Mom and Mum, and a step brother named Jack. One afternoon Rosie sees her mother dancing around in the living room full of happiness and excitement. When Rosie asks her mother what she is doing, her mother explains that her and her partner "mum" are getting married. This story takes it's readers through an exciting moment in a families lives as they celebrate the union of two people. Rosie convinces her moms to let her be the flower girl at their wedding while her step brother is the ring carrier. This story demonstrates how a family with two moms can be similar to a family with a mom and a dad.

[Mackenzie Loula · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mom and Mum Are Getting Married! by Ken Setterington is yet another great book that talks about same sex parents. This book tells the story of a cute little girl named Rosie who gets to celebrate the marriage of her two mothers. This book is a great way to introduce the topic of same sex marriage to young children, due to the upbeat and vibrate text and illustrations. Setterington does a great job introducing this topic in a fun and cute manner that children will enjoy and want to read again. Same-sex marriage is something that is seen in our society today more often than in the past, so I feel as if it is important for children to learn about it and become aware of it at a young age. This book could also help children with similar family types feel more comfortable and accepted in the classroom.

[Rick O'Connor · Rating 1 out of 5]

If you are looking for literature that deals with gay marriage, lesbian mothers, children of gay parents, gay relatives, etc, along with some nice illustrations, then this is your book. It's about a girl named Rosie, who is exited about the marriage and wants to be the flower girl (no flower girls allowed!...but mom eventually relents). She ends up working with her gay uncle to develop ways not to lose the wedding rings, which shows that the focus isn't about gay rights, but that gay characters are worrying about the same thing as everybody else. I would imagine if you are gay and you read this, you would feel good that you can relate to the characters and not have to read yet another book about traditional families, such as a man and a woman getting married. That's the point I think Setterington is going for with this book, and I think for the most part he succeeds.

[Susan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was surprised to see this book was published in 2004, and I'd never heard of it. A little girl comes home from school and discovers that her two mothers are going to get married.

I really rate it as 2.5 stars, but I'm rounding up because of its age.

The question of the original relationship of the two mothers -- how they happen to be living together, raising two kids who call them "Mom" and "Mum," but hadn't already gotten married -- is totally sidestepped. And the point of the marriage is stated as "We really want to celebrate how happy we are together." Really?

Nevertheless, there aren't enough books yet that celebrate alternative family structures, and in 2004 there were even fewer. So even though it has some flaws, I'm glad it's there.

[Ally · Rating 3 out of 5]

TEXT SET

A little girl, Rosie comes home from school one day to the news that her mothers are getting married. She is so excited for the ceremony, but when she finds out it is going to be small she worrries she won’t be able to be a flower girl. Her worries are washed away when she finds out she will be able to carry the rings with her brother, and the family celebrates a fun and loving wedding. Same-sex marriage is addressed in this book as if it is a normal part of everyday society and is not raised at all as an obstacle.

[Olivia · Rating 3 out of 5]

When Rosie finds out that her two mothers are getting married, she hopes to have a special part in their wedding.

Reading Practice


Book Level: 2.7

Interest Level: Lower Grades (LG K-3)

Fiction/Nonfiction: Fiction

Topic - Subtopic: Family Life-Homosexual Families; Family Life-Marriage

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

I actually really liked this. I appreciated that the plot was more about a girl wanting to be a flower girl and not focused fully on same-sex marriage. I think it is important because this is now just another book with characters living their lives. Hopefully this makes sense. Also, this is a bit of a longer book so no younger than grade 3 for sure.

[hhhhhhhhh · Rating 3 out of 5]

writing felt kinda stilted but maybe that's just me.

[Brittany · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a positive book on same-sex marriage and how the child is happy for couple getting married. This could be a good book on stereotype.