Tending the Bones: Reclaiming Pleasure after Transgenerational Sexual Trauma

by Pavini Moray

A 13-month guided pathway for healing transgenerational sexual trauma

Body-based practices, ancestral connection rituals, and reflective empowerment exercises to integrate trauma, build resilience, center pleasure, and reclaim wholeness

Healing from sexual trauma is deep, transformative, and life-changing work. And when we begin the journey to address not just our own traumas but those borne by our ancestors, we heal across generations—finding wholeness and reclaiming erotic wellness for ourselves while lovingly tending the harm and trauma carried in our lineages.

From altars to reverence practices, resilience plans to somatic resourcing, Tending the Bones holds you in care and power. Pavini Moray, PhD invites you to reconnect to the profound wisdom of your body—and your ancestors.

Part Build Inner Resources offers skills, practices, and resilience tools essential to healing the wounds of transgenerational sexual trauma
Part Heal Trauma helps you acknowledge and integrate traumatic experiences and invites you to explore what justice means to you.
Part Savor shows you how to connect and work with ancestral guides. It also explores principles of somatic sexuality for recovering wholeness and pleasure after sexual trauma.

Guided by the 13 lunar cycles of the year, each module includes a ritual, prayer, poem, daily practice, and worksheet for reflection and healing. With chapters like “Blessing Moon,” “Ancestor Moon,” “Sovereign Moon,” “Integration Moon,” and more, Tending the Bones takes a holistic, multidisciplinary approach to healing from sexual trauma and provides a safe container and solid foundation to explore this deep transformational work.

Engaging, warm, and authentic, Tending the Bones centers your experiences as a reader and survivor, whether you’ve experienced sexual trauma, are living the embodied impacts of your ancestors’ trauma, or both.

809 pages, Kindle Edition

Published January 28, 2025

Reviews

[Donna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Many of us have ancestors who've experienced sexual harm and likely some who've caused sexual harm. It can flow down a family line, touching each generation or skipping some entirely. Other times, the sexual harm repeatedly comes from outside of the family. There are mixtures of both.

Survivors who are working on healing know how challenging and lonely the journey can be. What if you can ask your ancestors for help? What if your healing goes beyond personal benefits and heals those who came before you? If you know that it's possible to make a difference for yourself and for others, would you do so?

If you want to heal yourself and ancestors, I encourage you to pick up a copy of this book. Take the time to do the activities. I read through the book once and am now working my way month by month through the activities. I already feel more of a connection to my ancestors.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC! I purchased a hardcopy of this book because I needed to have my own and do all of the exercises.

[Kira K · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily. First of all, I loved the dedication and it is a great start to this sort of book with an important but rarely discussed topic. I like the way the work was split up into months and personally looked at the design on the first page of each month as it’s beautiful and starts each month off well. I appreciated the workbooks in the appendix and liked the broad range of resources provided at the end with podcasts, books and videos being provided as well as resources specifically provided to accompany the book and some physicians.