A Black Girl in the Middle: Essays on (Allegedly) Figuring It All Out

by Shenequa Golding

A blazingly honest essay collection from a refreshing new voice exploring the in-between moments for Black women and girls, and what it means to simply exist

“At thirty-seven years old I can say Shenequa is a big name and I’m a big, bold woman.”

Shenequa Golding doesn’t aim to speak for all Black women. We’re too vast, too vibrant, and too complicated. As an adult, Golding begins to own her boldness, but growing up, she found herself “kind of in the middle,” fluctuating between not being the fly kid or the overachiever. Her debut collection of essays, A Black Girl in the Middle taps into life’s wins and losses, representing the middle ground for Black girls and women.

Golding packs humor, curiosity, honesty, anger, and ultimately acceptance in 12 essays spanning her life in Queens, NY, as a first generation Jamaican American. She breaks down the 10 levels of Black Girl Math, from the hard glare to responses reserved for unfaithful boyfriends. She comes to terms with and heals from fraught relationships with her father, friends, and romantic partners. She takes the devastating news that she’s a Black girl with a “flat ass” in stride, and adds squats to her routine, eventually. From a harrowing encounter in a hotel room leading her to explore celibacy (for now) to embracing rather than fearing the “Milli Vanilli” of emotions in hurt and anger, Golding embraces everything she’s learned with wit, heart, and humility.


A Black Girl in the Middle is both an acknowledgment of the complexity and pride of not always fitting in and validation of what Black girlhood and womanhood can be.

Genres: Essays, Nonfiction, Race, Memoir

200 pages, Paperback

First published May 7, 2024

Reviews

[Tamela Gordon · Rating 5 out of 5]

First of all, she funny.

Black Girl in the Middle is the perfect read for Black girls who love coffee, conversation, and we’ll thought-out opinions. In a world that lacks nuance, Shanequa graces readers with clever, sometimes heartbreaking reflections she pulls from her past, her culture, and her relationships.

I didn’t always agree with her (I think she was a bit too hard on a friend and coffee will always come second in my world), but that was honestly part of the fun in reading. Her ideas and opinions aren’t for the sake of being a provocateur, she’s just a smart Black girl who’s bold enough to speak on life as she lives it.

Black Girl in the Middle is engaging and comforting, especially for those of us who are dating, working, and a-okay with not swinging with either side of the millennial pendulum.

[Joyce B · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a wonderful surprise of a book! Didn’t know what to expect but I am very glad I won a copy on Goodreads. This book is perfect for ANY young woman just starting out in life. The only chapter that is unique to Black girls is the first, though I think there are lessons to be learned by anyone. My daughter is in her 40’s and I gave her a copy and encouraged her to read it.
I like Ms Golding’s writing style. She writes as if she is in conversation with her reader. She includes humor appropriately. What I really love is how she describes her growth, admitting her failures and acknowledging when she hasn’t made as much progress as she wants. This lends authenticity to the book. I wish I had something like this to read when I was in my 20’s. I have already recommended it to several people.

[Beverly · Rating 3 out of 5]

Many thanks to Beacon Press for the ARC. I am not a woman of color but found much to connect and empathize with in these thoughtful and thought-provoking essays. Recommended.

[Kari · Rating 4 out of 5]

Many thanks to Beacon Press for sending me a free copy of this book to read and review. I found this book full of essays to be relatable in some areas. I am not a woman of color but I could resonate with how she was feeling in aspects of her life. When she is talking about growing up and navigating her teenage years, I could really feel that. I believe we are around the same age, so listening to her talk about the styles at that time, and flats versus heels, going home versus staying out late, I totally get that. I have recommended this book to friends of mine, even before I had even finished it. I think they can all relate to parts of it like it did.

[Alcian · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a read!! If you’ve ever found yourself navigating life’s many twists and turns as a Black women in our 30s, A Black Girl in the Middle will resonate with you deeply—especially if you’ve been balancing the rollercoaster ride of self-discovery, career growth, and personal evolution.

This book is the companion I didn’t know I needed but secretly hoping for ‼️‼️ filled with all the laughs, epiphanies, and "Aha!" moments.

If you're looking for a book that feels like a chat with your closest friend who gets it, this is it.

I cannot wait to unpack this with you all

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ read for me!

[Yvette · Rating 4 out of 5]

I won this book from a giveaway! Overall, I really enjoyed this collection of essays and am glad I got a chance to read them. I found some of the experiences to be very relatable and others to be super insightful. Highly recommend this book!

[Abigail Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this is definitely gonna be a reread, for me.

[lisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was marketed to me "For readers of Morgan Jerkins and Zeba Blay". I love Morgan Jerkins, and am only so-so on Zeba Blay, and this book leaned more toward Zeba Blay, so it was only ok. I think Shenequa Golding made some good points about things. I had never thought much about the burden of name like Shenequa so that chapter was pretty interesting, and her chapter about her awkward relationship with her father was really well written. I loved how she talked about how her love of coffee is partially about the comfort and trust she knows it offers, that she can be assured a good cup of coffee in a way that she cannot be assured that she will be treated well by men.

However there was a lot in this book that was pretty lackluster and dull. There was a lot of complaints about Golding's friends, and unfortunately, I found myself sympathetic to the ones whom Golding felt wronged her. Part of this was because the emails she sent to them (which are reprinted in this very book) seemed so self-righteous and intense. You could clearly see the recipients of these emails reading these snippy missives in pure confusion, unable to form a response to something so obviously overblown. One of them literally LOLs in Golding's face, because what else can you do? This writer has not-so-smoothly written herself the hero of a story I am willing to bet had a very different side to it. There is also a lot of writing about Golding's life that was not compelling enough to keep me engaged. Also, I think sometimes she was trying to be funny, but the humor often missed the mark for me.

All in all, this was fine, but I would still recommend Morgan Jerkins over Shenequa Golding. Jerkin's is simply a better writer.

[Joan Osborne · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love her humor. She just lays herself out bare and out there. Her feelings about black girl math, black names, men, sex, work, friendships, make-up, bodies, Brazilian Butt Lifts, fathers, COVID time, etc, etc. I love how she writes about being comfortable indoors, at home; about being ready to leave the party earlier than others, spending time alone, recharging. Reading being life. As an introvert, we’re on the same page. I hear her, I’m with her and totally understand. She’s my kindred spirit. Yes, people don’t get us introverts.A little socialization is ok, but we have to have ‘me time’, which is precious. And yes, taking vacations by yourself is a thing. The essays felt like a conversation. Easy to read, natural and fun.

[Courtney Hogue · Rating 5 out of 5]

A transparent and highly relatable memoir about the coming of age of a professional Black woman in America, highlighting her struggles with race, relationships and releasing projections placed on her throughout her journey to womanhood.

[Sarah Easton · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was GREAT!! The author is funny. My type of funny...corny!! I read via Libby app and was confused why the author didn't narrate but it was very well written, short and all too relatable. 👏🏾 👏🏾 👏🏾

[Alda · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a Latina I found many layers of my lived experiences overlapping to the author's life. She wrote her feelings beautifully with a hefty shaking of humor that did not leave me thinking she was deflecting, but that she genuinely is a funny human.

[Keundrea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love. Love. LOVED this book!! Every single chapter resonated with me in some way! I listened to the audiobook, which in my opinion made the book even better, but I plan to buy a physical copy because I can see myself going back to this one! 5 STARS!!

[Uzoamaka · Rating 3 out of 5]

The authors shares her life in various topics/ headings though I can’t help comment that most occurred during or post pandemic c2020 which made it seem like the context or regular setting. Quite a lot of personal stuff shared and it made sense when acknowledgement included the therapist.

[Laura · Rating 1 out of 5]

Never even received, so I can't review...

[Bre · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great read!

[Gail · Rating 2 out of 5]

Didn't like this book - didn't finish.

[Ari · Rating 4 out of 5]

somewhere between a 3 and 3.5, a few good essays but the rest are hard for me to remember. Lots of potential though and I'd read Golding's other books

[kozzy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love an honest and raw description of feelings and experiences. Such an easy and captivating read full of growth and acceptance. 👏🏻

[Baldwin Gittens · Rating 4 out of 5]

Felt validating to read a story like this but wish it was longer. A bit triggering to read about Covid but was a nice, short read! (3.8)

[Dessa Awadjie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quick and easy read. I found it relatable.