Crazy: Memoir of a Mom Gone Mad

by Charise Jewell

When Charise Jewell decided to leave her career as a robotics engineer to pursue writing fiction, the 40-year old mother of three had no idea that she was embarking on a real life story beyond her wildest imagination. Without warning, and while preparing to celebrate Mother’s Day 2017, she rapidly descended into a severe mania, was hospitalized, and was given a devastating diagnosis: bipolar 1 mood disorder. Over the following three years, Charise and her family would experience the ups and downs of not only her manic depression, but also of the mental health care system, and the way that society at large treats people with mental illness. Crazy: Memoir of a Mom Gone Mad is a captivating, heartbreaking and ultimately inspiring journey through the pain and beauty of sanity, and insanity.

359 pages, Paperback

Published May 13, 2024

About the author

A voracious reader and aspiring writer since childhood, Charise Jewell was born in South Africa and immigrated to Canada when she was seven years old. She holds an Honours B.Eng. in mechanical engineering from McGill University, and worked as a robotics engineer for fifteen years before becoming a writer. Charise is the author of Crazy, Memoir of a Mom Gone Mad and Normal. She proudly lives with bipolar disorder and educates for the fair and dignified treatment of the mentally ill.

Reviews

[Joy Norstrom · Rating 5 out of 5]

Crazy: Memoir of a Mom Gone Mad is a compelling read that I highly recommend. The author, a former robotics engineer, mother and creative, shares a vivid and deeply intimate account of her experience with bipolar disorder. From illness to diagnosis to learning to live with a complex and often misunderstood condition, this memoir could not be written by anyone on the outside looking in.

Jewell’s story is both profound and compelling. She provides a searing account of the mental health care system in Canada while addressing the impacts of mental illness on her personal life and family connections.

While Jewell’s memoir confirmed my beliefs on systemic injustices experienced by those seeking treatment for mental illness, it also educated me on the beauty of family and resilience of humanity. I admire Jewell’s stark and dignified account of the trials and successes along her journey and believe Crazy: Memoir of a Mom Gone Mad should be required reading for all Canadians.

[Jacqueline Aubin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Charise Jewell is a beautiful storyteller. Her memoir, ‘Crazy’ flows like a compelling novel.

As a mother, wife, writer, and former robotics engineer, Jewell experienced her first manic episode and hospitalization at age forty. A rarity, when most with the disorder are diagnosed in early twenties.

Her self-awareness, intelligence, journals and detailed recollections leave her uniquely equipped to write such an informative, yet personal account of being diagnosed and living with bipolar.

Her drawings are fascinating, lending further insight to her experiences at various stages of mania. Even during a period of an inner chaos, there’s a certain precision to her drawings; clean symmetrical lines, circular themes, mathematical expressions, and her neat engineering penmanship remarkably remain intact. She is still present in her art, vibrantly shining through the temporary chaos.

Jewell handles her diagnosis with a level of grace, honesty, and humour that is inspiring. She also brings to light the stigma that mental illness still carries despite being a medical condition like any other. Her experiences with our mental health resources, facilities, hospitals and staff are heartbreaking; confirming that methods to how we care for people in crisis must be a priority for change in our health care system. And accountability for when that system fails is something that patients should be able to rely on.

In writing ‘Crazy: Memoir of a Mom Gone Mad’ Jewell has delivered an insightful gift for family and friends of those living with bipolar. This is a must-read for people touched by this condition and for anyone who aspires to better understand.

[Shaley Hoogendoorn · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a must read for anyone that has Bipolar Disorder and those that love someone living with it. Charise tells her story bravely and honestly. I appreciated all the care and detail put into her storytelling. I could see myself in so many parts of her story and I know others will too. I love how she doesn’t use toxic positivity or wrap the book up in a big “happy” bow. I think that all who read this book will get a clear understanding of what it can look and feels like to live with Bipolar Disorder. Charise’s advocacy is helping end stigma around Mental illness. This memoir was real, raw and captivating and I recommend it to all.

[MN · Rating 5 out of 5]

Charise Jewell gifts her readers with a riveting account of her journey with type 1 bipolar disorder. Jewell’s book is hard to put down as we’re led from her calm, suburban life into what quickly becomes an unexpected and life-altering storm.

What makes Crazy: Memoir of a Mom Gone Mad so effective is that Jewell herself is so incredibly relatable. When we first start reading, we are welcomed into the home and mind of a forty year-old individual doing typical household things: making dinner, chatting with family members, getting kids to set the table. We feel and relate to the monotony of this experience. As the story unfolds and takes us down the path of Jewell’s journey, we’re also led to feel the emotion, humour, creativity, and eventual vulnerability that Jewell experiences right alongside her. The truth is, she could be any one of us.

Crazy raises several important questions. None of us are immune to mental illness, so why does it continue to be so stigmatized? Why are patients who are being treated for mental illness in hospital treated so dismissively by staff and, in Jewell’s case, so brutally? Why would someone who doesn’t believe in the dignity of humans choose to work in the field of mental health and especially in a psychiatric facility? Jewell successfully brings to light some the flaws in the health care system when it comes to treating mental illness.

Sadly, bipolar disorder is frequently and stigmatized in both the media and society. Jewell reminds us that — like any chronic health condition requiring ongoing treatment — bipolar disorder can be managed with the right care and isn’t the stereotype or spectacle often seen in the media. She shares with us some of the adjustments someone living with bipolar disorder must make to stay healthy (taking medications that make them feel sluggish, among other life-altering side effects), the guilt they may feel for not being able to contribute in a way they once could, plus the anxiety-inducing need to tread lightly in order to seem stable.

When considering all that a person may experience throughout their diagnosis and ongoing treatment, we need to be treating those living with bipolar disorder with compassion and dignity, not judgement. In Crazy, Charise Jewell delivers a very compelling and powerful reminder of this.

[Dana Peterson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Charise’s memoir of her experience during two bipolar episodes is equally compelling and devastating as it is light hearted and humorous. This book is very relatable to any middle aged woman/mom/parent regardless of mental health diagnosis. Highly recommend!

[Krissy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Charise tells her story with unflinching honesty and bravery that will help bring light to what it’s really like to live with mental illness and how the mental healthcare system needs to be improved.

This book read so fluidly and kept me hooked the whole time, with beautiful storytelling that paints a clear picture of her symptoms and the events around her.

Thank you Charise for being vulnerable and sharing your story. It helps make others feel seen and less alone. 🩵

[Shannon Moroney · Rating 5 out of 5]

Charise Jewell is a brilliant writer who takes the reader behind her eyes to see and feel the terror—and the beauty—of living with mental illness. It does what the best memoirs do: comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable. A true must-read!