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Betrayal and Forgiveness: How to Navigate the Turmoil and Learn to Trust Again
How Can I Recover from Betrayal?
You’ve been betrayed. Maybe your partner has cheated on you, or abused you, or ruined you financially, or failed to live up to their commitments to you. Or maybe a family member or close friend has lied about you, or insulted you, or disinherited you, or treated you in ways you just can’t overlook.
How do you get through the emotional turmoil? How can you get past the anger and learn to trust again? How do you decide what to do about your relationship with the one who betrayed you?
Dr. Bruce Chalmer’s Betrayal and Forgiveness shows you how. You’ll to get through the shock of betrayalWhy forgiveness is important—and when you shouldn’t forgiveThree steps to forgivenessWhy a mindset of faith—not necessarily religious—is a vital part of healingHow to learn to trust yourself againHow to decide if you want to rebuild trust with the one who betrayed youHow to move on, together or separately, and find joy and gratitude againHow to make amends and heal if you’re the one who betrayed someoneYou’ll meet twelve couples and follow their stories as they navigate the difficult journey from betrayal to resolution.
Betrayal and Forgiveness is for anyone who wants to heal, survive, and thrive after betrayal.
You’ve been betrayed. Maybe your partner has cheated on you, or abused you, or ruined you financially, or failed to live up to their commitments to you. Or maybe a family member or close friend has lied about you, or insulted you, or disinherited you, or treated you in ways you just can’t overlook.
How do you get through the emotional turmoil? How can you get past the anger and learn to trust again? How do you decide what to do about your relationship with the one who betrayed you?
Dr. Bruce Chalmer’s Betrayal and Forgiveness shows you how. You’ll to get through the shock of betrayalWhy forgiveness is important—and when you shouldn’t forgiveThree steps to forgivenessWhy a mindset of faith—not necessarily religious—is a vital part of healingHow to learn to trust yourself againHow to decide if you want to rebuild trust with the one who betrayed youHow to move on, together or separately, and find joy and gratitude againHow to make amends and heal if you’re the one who betrayed someoneYou’ll meet twelve couples and follow their stories as they navigate the difficult journey from betrayal to resolution.
Betrayal and Forgiveness is for anyone who wants to heal, survive, and thrive after betrayal.
201 pages, Kindle Edition
Published June 4, 2024
About the author
Bruce Chalmer
9 books3 followersDr. Bruce Chalmer has been helping couples for over thirty years. Through his teaching, consulting, and videos about relationships, his ideas have helped thousands of couples and their therapists.
Together with his wife, Judy Alexander, Dr. Chalmer is the host of the Couples Therapy in Seven Words podcast (https://ctin7.com).
Dr. Chalmer's website is https://brucechalmer.com.
Together with his wife, Judy Alexander, Dr. Chalmer is the host of the Couples Therapy in Seven Words podcast (https://ctin7.com).
Dr. Chalmer's website is https://brucechalmer.com.
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
January 15, 2026
Wow. Dr Bruce Chalmer understands betrayal, and doesnt down play it! He KNOWS the pain it can cause. He has seen it in his therapy sessions. It was almost a relief to know someone understands such betrayal and hurt.
Although this book is aimed at mostly infidelity, the lessons are the same. He talks about and understands the pain associated with betrayal, and his lessons on how to move past it are gold. I took away so much from this book - mostly about forgiveness....forgiveness means you give up hope of trying to change the past. You can't change it, and it doesn't absolve the betrayer of their responsibility in what happened - forgiving means you are free to get on with your life. The lessons on forgiveness are also powerful.
Another book i will read often.
Although this book is aimed at mostly infidelity, the lessons are the same. He talks about and understands the pain associated with betrayal, and his lessons on how to move past it are gold. I took away so much from this book - mostly about forgiveness....forgiveness means you give up hope of trying to change the past. You can't change it, and it doesn't absolve the betrayer of their responsibility in what happened - forgiving means you are free to get on with your life. The lessons on forgiveness are also powerful.
Another book i will read often.
July 16, 2024
This is a really good and important contribution to the topic of affair recovery & betrayal (although it talks about ALL kinds of betrayal). So many of the things Dr. Chalmer talks about in this book are crucial to this process. Note that this is not a Christian book even though it uses the word “faith” - Dr. Chalmer explains what he’s talking about with “God” and “faith” is more about trusting reality & the universe, or whatever you want to call it. There’s no religious perspective here. Definitely will be recommending this one to clients.
June 21, 2024
I can relate to at least two, maybe even three scenarios presented in this book. I think just about every human being has been betrayed, whether by a friend, a parent, a partner, a teacher or a child. Dr. Chalmer clearly goes through the steps of what exactly betrayal is, how to forgive (including yourself) and how to get past it. It really opened my eyes to what I was holding on to and how it was affecting me. He even includes a chapter for the betrayer (I might have to send out a few copies!). I loved the scenarios presented and liked how he told us what became of the folks who had been betrayed. I can't recommend it enough.
July 5, 2024
Dr. Chalmers writes beautifully and he has compassion for his readers and the couples he has helped over the years.
Through exploring the experiences of sample couples, the doctor is able to offer definitions of betrayal and forgiveness. What does it take to forgive? That is what the majority of the book is about. And about faith, our own and in God and in others.
The chapters end with some reflection questions to help you consider your feelings and where you are in your forgiveness journey.
Time well spent; the author gives the readers lots to consider.
Through exploring the experiences of sample couples, the doctor is able to offer definitions of betrayal and forgiveness. What does it take to forgive? That is what the majority of the book is about. And about faith, our own and in God and in others.
The chapters end with some reflection questions to help you consider your feelings and where you are in your forgiveness journey.
Time well spent; the author gives the readers lots to consider.
April 11, 2026
Not just marital betrayal. This book defines betrayal as a (serious) violation of expectations. Those expectations are in the mind of the “betrayed”, and might or might not be recognized by the “betrayer” as anything serious.
“ To betray someone is to fail, in an important way, to live up to what they expect of you based on your relationship with them.”
I read the book serially, but the beginning of some chapters gave me the feeling that the author didn’t expect chapters to be read sequential. This book is addressed to those who feel “betrayed.”
After finishing this book, I read the following which felt like it is related.
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/s...
“ To betray someone is to fail, in an important way, to live up to what they expect of you based on your relationship with them.”
I read the book serially, but the beginning of some chapters gave me the feeling that the author didn’t expect chapters to be read sequential. This book is addressed to those who feel “betrayed.”
After finishing this book, I read the following which felt like it is related.
https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/s...
December 5, 2024
Greta refresher on betrayal and forgiveness!
July 22, 2025
A simple not too deep to help book for anyone going through betrayal. The information he covers is very helpful! I would recommend this to anyone going through a betrayal!
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews