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Redeeming Sex in Marriage: How the Gospel Rescues Sex, Transforms Marriage, and Reveals the Glory of God
Discover the God-given nature of your sexuality and the magnitude of Christ’s power to redeem it in this honest, winsome resource for married couples. Biblical counselor and pastor Scott Mehl explores truths about God’s beautiful purposes for sex that will empower you to put godly sexuality into practice—living a life of sexual fulfillment and wholeness like never before.
Endorsements“[Scott] speaks as a soul physician who ministers the Word to some of the most culturally relevant questions facing us today.”
—Ernie Baker, Pastor of Counseling Supervision, First Baptist Church, Jacksonville, Florida
“Grounded in sound theology and biblical exegesis while also being most practical. It answers the hard, awkward questions directly but discreetly.”
—Jim Newhesier, Executive Director, The Institute for Biblical Counseling and Discipleship
“Clarifies God’s design for sex and how to joyfully experience it in our marriages. . . . Not just for pastors or counselors but for every married couple in the church.”
—Shauna Van Dyke, Founder and Biblical Counselor, Truth Renewed Ministries
“I’m so thankful for Scott Mehl and his desire to speak pastorally and humbly about a topic so fraught with land mines. . . . I joyfully recommend this book!”
—Elyse Fitzpatrick, Author, Jesus and Gender
“The author is an ideal a very experienced pastor who is open, warm, and comfortable with the topic.”
—Edward T. Welch, Faculty and Counselor, Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation
Endorsements“[Scott] speaks as a soul physician who ministers the Word to some of the most culturally relevant questions facing us today.”
—Ernie Baker, Pastor of Counseling Supervision, First Baptist Church, Jacksonville, Florida
“Grounded in sound theology and biblical exegesis while also being most practical. It answers the hard, awkward questions directly but discreetly.”
—Jim Newhesier, Executive Director, The Institute for Biblical Counseling and Discipleship
“Clarifies God’s design for sex and how to joyfully experience it in our marriages. . . . Not just for pastors or counselors but for every married couple in the church.”
—Shauna Van Dyke, Founder and Biblical Counselor, Truth Renewed Ministries
“I’m so thankful for Scott Mehl and his desire to speak pastorally and humbly about a topic so fraught with land mines. . . . I joyfully recommend this book!”
—Elyse Fitzpatrick, Author, Jesus and Gender
“The author is an ideal a very experienced pastor who is open, warm, and comfortable with the topic.”
—Edward T. Welch, Faculty and Counselor, Christian Counseling & Educational Foundation
218 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 22, 2024
39 people are currently reading
115 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
December 17, 2024
A must-read. For everyone.
July 28, 2024
Some Christian books on sex are all theological and not practical. Some are the other way around. And some of the practical ones share way too much weird and/or unhelpful information (and diagrams!). Redeeming Sex in Marriage is a gift to the church since Dr. Scott Mehl is able to present a faithful (and glorious!) theology of sex as the foundation for practical principles.
Mehl frames his theology of sex with the question “Why did God create us as sexual beings?” before providing five reasons:
1. Sex is a means of covenantal union. (Essential/Relational purpose)
2. Sex is a means of mutual pleasure. (Essential/Relational purpose)
3. Sex is an expression of marital love. (Essential/Relational purpose)
4. Sex can bring new life. (Blessed purpose)
5. Sex is a shadow of our relationship with Christ, as his church. (Transcendent purpose)
One strength of Mehl’s book is his depth of understanding of the variety of problems we face and how the gospel speaks to these problems. The result is a realistic, but hopeful book that will drive readers to hope in God and cherish their spouses more.
I can see Redeeming Sex in Marriage being life-changing and life-giving for many couples trying to enjoy the wonderful (yet sometimes challenging!) gift of intimacy. I don’t do pre-marital counseling or marriage mentoring, but if I did, this would be on my short list of books to use.
Mehl frames his theology of sex with the question “Why did God create us as sexual beings?” before providing five reasons:
1. Sex is a means of covenantal union. (Essential/Relational purpose)
2. Sex is a means of mutual pleasure. (Essential/Relational purpose)
3. Sex is an expression of marital love. (Essential/Relational purpose)
4. Sex can bring new life. (Blessed purpose)
5. Sex is a shadow of our relationship with Christ, as his church. (Transcendent purpose)
One strength of Mehl’s book is his depth of understanding of the variety of problems we face and how the gospel speaks to these problems. The result is a realistic, but hopeful book that will drive readers to hope in God and cherish their spouses more.
I can see Redeeming Sex in Marriage being life-changing and life-giving for many couples trying to enjoy the wonderful (yet sometimes challenging!) gift of intimacy. I don’t do pre-marital counseling or marriage mentoring, but if I did, this would be on my short list of books to use.
February 1, 2025
I can’t say enough about this. You must read it as a married Christian. Don’t wait, don’t put it off, don’t say later, go buy it now and read it together! I wept and cried and loved my Lord more for the beauty of His love for us as husband and wife ❤️
February 7, 2025
Excellent book!!
December 22, 2024
This book is a must read for Christian married couples. It is by far the best book on the theology of sex in marriage, and based on that sound theology Pastor Mehl’s application is right on target! He says the things that need to be said that others are hesitant to say. Scott brings us truth from what the Bible says on sex accompanied by the grace of Christ.
This book has been a huge help in my marriage counseling cases. And I’m going to be gifting it to every premarital case I finish. If you are a married (or about to be), get this book asap. One day, I think you will give glory to God for reading Redeeming Sex in Marriage and applying what you learned. Highly recommended!
This book has been a huge help in my marriage counseling cases. And I’m going to be gifting it to every premarital case I finish. If you are a married (or about to be), get this book asap. One day, I think you will give glory to God for reading Redeeming Sex in Marriage and applying what you learned. Highly recommended!
May 10, 2025
Excellent!
July 8, 2024
Superb. Great blend of theology and practical help (all without the cringy language and diagrams!). Perhaps the best book on the topic I have read.
July 17, 2025
I have been searching for a book on sex for years that beautifully complements theology and practicality, and I have finally found it. I didn't expect to get teary eyed in this book... I can't think of a time I have reading Christian literature such as this, but I did. I have been married for 9 years, and even so Scott made so many statements that finally clicked and made sense.
His credentials as a husband, counselor and pastor make him the perfect candidate to speak into this subject, with years of personal and case wisdom. He gently and wisely considers those who are filled with incredible sexual shame, brokenness in their marriages, the weaponization of Scripture in abusive marriages, and the grief many couples have surrounding sex. He was not too heady, but made each chapter robustly applicable and saturated in Scripture.
If you're looking for a book that is not focused on what sex isn't, but what it is, how God beautifully created sex and continues to redeem it, that is richly practical and how you can find beauty and meaning in sex, this is it. This has enriched my marriage for the better, and will be a resource I refer to often in counseling. I wish this was a required reading for every engaged and married couple, and the first section required for every teen and single person to read. Endebted to Scott for this work!
His credentials as a husband, counselor and pastor make him the perfect candidate to speak into this subject, with years of personal and case wisdom. He gently and wisely considers those who are filled with incredible sexual shame, brokenness in their marriages, the weaponization of Scripture in abusive marriages, and the grief many couples have surrounding sex. He was not too heady, but made each chapter robustly applicable and saturated in Scripture.
If you're looking for a book that is not focused on what sex isn't, but what it is, how God beautifully created sex and continues to redeem it, that is richly practical and how you can find beauty and meaning in sex, this is it. This has enriched my marriage for the better, and will be a resource I refer to often in counseling. I wish this was a required reading for every engaged and married couple, and the first section required for every teen and single person to read. Endebted to Scott for this work!
September 10, 2024
What a fantastic resource. Mehl handles the topic of intimacy with great care and a high regard for what scripture says about sex. He begins with a robust theology of sex that prepares the reader for more practical information in the second half of the book. While he's direct and doesn't shy away from using actual anatomy terms, he is also not unnecessarily detailed. There's no uncomfortable diagrams or overly personal anecdotes. (Thankfully.) He corrects many of the stereotypes that are often found in Christian books on this topic and also delves into areas that are typically neglected.
While the information he presents isn't comprehensive enough to fully address every issue a couple might face, it provides a very solid foundation for seeing sex as more than just "God's gift to married people" and offers hope for almost any struggle. A must read for couples at any stage of marriage and for counselors.
While the information he presents isn't comprehensive enough to fully address every issue a couple might face, it provides a very solid foundation for seeing sex as more than just "God's gift to married people" and offers hope for almost any struggle. A must read for couples at any stage of marriage and for counselors.
June 10, 2024
4.5 Stars. One of the criteria for me to give a book 5 stars is that it needs to shape or change the way I view something. This book definitely did that. I'm giving 4.5 stars because it's more along the lines of personal growth than literature. This is by far the best book I have read on the topic of sex. Mehl outlines the truths around its purpose; and offers respectful answers to questions we'd never ask our pastor. He also confronts its abuses and offers compassionate words for victims. This book is not just for married people; singles will get a lot out of it as well. Highly recommend.
November 8, 2024
This might be the best book on God-honoring sex I've read. It's not a technique book but rather talks about more of the theology and intimacy of sex and how intimacy in sex reflects the intimacy we can have being created in the image of God. It also gives very practical advice about how to discuss sex with children and train and mentor in giving a wholesome, biblical, God-honoring view of sex. Great resource!
July 27, 2025
Wow! This book….wow! Between this and many many conversations with my wife I feel like I am just starting to understand sex rightly, and by rightly biblically! I think I need to read it again, starting now.
October 27, 2025
It’s been a min since I read a Christian sex book.
This one is worth it and I can recommend without caveat!
This one is worth it and I can recommend without caveat!
December 17, 2024
📚 Redeeming Sex in Marriage by Scott Mehl
“God’s Word is his revelation of not just the ‘what’ and the ‘how to’ of the world but also the ‘why’ behind all life and existence. It’s his revelation of himself, and it’s the only way we can truly understand life or experience godliness (see 2 Peter 1:3). That is why, regardless of our age, God’s Word ought to be the first place we look to answer the ‘why’ questions that nag our hearts and minds. It’s our ultimate authority, especially when it comes to the most complicated and difficult aspects of life. So, if we’re going to understand sex—and I mean really understand it—we need to begin with the Word of God…” 💍
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This book is the best book I’ve read on the subject of the marriage bed! Equal parts theology and guiding principles with a whole lot of gospel! This book is so important because it helps you work through what the bible says about sex in marriage and it helped me solidify truths and unlearn the lies from the world. I think everyone married and engaged would benefit from reading this book and I think it would also be helpful for a parent who is teaching their kids about God’s design. I also appreciated that the book discussed these topics in an appropriate, non-explicit way 🙌
*❗️: Part 1 suitable for anyone 17+ and parents wanting to teach their kids about the theology of the marriage bed
*❗️: Parts 1 & 2 suitable for married couples & engaged couples (I’d recommend the very end weeks of engagement)
*my personal opinion
#kyleesreads #redeemingsexinmarriage #scottmehl #christianmarriage #christiannonfiction #biblicalcounseling #christiancounseling #bookstagram #bookstagrammer #whatimreading #bookreview #bookish #reading #readersofinstagram #bookishlove #bookishlife #booklove #booklover #bookworm #bookcommunity
“God’s Word is his revelation of not just the ‘what’ and the ‘how to’ of the world but also the ‘why’ behind all life and existence. It’s his revelation of himself, and it’s the only way we can truly understand life or experience godliness (see 2 Peter 1:3). That is why, regardless of our age, God’s Word ought to be the first place we look to answer the ‘why’ questions that nag our hearts and minds. It’s our ultimate authority, especially when it comes to the most complicated and difficult aspects of life. So, if we’re going to understand sex—and I mean really understand it—we need to begin with the Word of God…” 💍
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This book is the best book I’ve read on the subject of the marriage bed! Equal parts theology and guiding principles with a whole lot of gospel! This book is so important because it helps you work through what the bible says about sex in marriage and it helped me solidify truths and unlearn the lies from the world. I think everyone married and engaged would benefit from reading this book and I think it would also be helpful for a parent who is teaching their kids about God’s design. I also appreciated that the book discussed these topics in an appropriate, non-explicit way 🙌
*❗️: Part 1 suitable for anyone 17+ and parents wanting to teach their kids about the theology of the marriage bed
*❗️: Parts 1 & 2 suitable for married couples & engaged couples (I’d recommend the very end weeks of engagement)
*my personal opinion
#kyleesreads #redeemingsexinmarriage #scottmehl #christianmarriage #christiannonfiction #biblicalcounseling #christiancounseling #bookstagram #bookstagrammer #whatimreading #bookreview #bookish #reading #readersofinstagram #bookishlove #bookishlife #booklove #booklover #bookworm #bookcommunity
June 12, 2024
Truly a fantastic book—useful for at least four types of readers. (1) Teens wanting to understand the why behind a Christian sexual ethic will find an inspiring vision for sex (and motivation to wait). (2) Mehl’s guiding definition and principles are especially useful for newlyweds as they build intimacy. He introduces a lot of important concepts that can preempt future struggles by opening lines of dialogue early. (3) Difficult topics like abuse, childlessness, and misuse of scripture are handled with tact and sensitivity, supporting struggling couples as they navigate specific challenges. And (4) even those who have been married a long time and are generally happy with their sex life will discover ways in which a richer theology of sex deepens both their relationship with each other and their worship.
Among some great books on this topic (and quite a few duds), this one stands out uniquely in its integration of both theology and practical guidance. Mehl takes the time to establish a rich and comprehensive picture of God’s design for sex that then becomes a foundation on which to build upon the joys of sexual experience and deconstruct its struggles. He smartly avoids tips and tricks, which could fall flat (or worse) for a portion of readers, but because his framing is so strong, there is still abundant immediate application. Mehl invites each couple to journey thoughtfully together, building an intimacy unique to their own marriage.
Among some great books on this topic (and quite a few duds), this one stands out uniquely in its integration of both theology and practical guidance. Mehl takes the time to establish a rich and comprehensive picture of God’s design for sex that then becomes a foundation on which to build upon the joys of sexual experience and deconstruct its struggles. He smartly avoids tips and tricks, which could fall flat (or worse) for a portion of readers, but because his framing is so strong, there is still abundant immediate application. Mehl invites each couple to journey thoughtfully together, building an intimacy unique to their own marriage.
August 23, 2024
In the Christian publishing world, there are a lot of unbiblical, unhelpful, and downright weird books on the topics of sex and marriage. There are also some very good ones, but this book was hands down the best book on the subject that I have read (and I’ve read quite a few). It was thoroughly biblical, hopeful, and encouraging. It also dispels some harmful myths that have come from the purity culture movement and other wacky movements in recent years. I listened to it on Audible, but it’s one that I will be purchasing in a hard copy as well. Note: As he says in the book, don’t skip the theological chapters that come first! This book should be read from cover to cover to get the right foundation for the later practical chapters. It is a short book, so it isn’t a big investment in time.
June 10, 2025
A theological perspective on sex and its right place. Every adult Christian whether married or unmarried, but especially married, needs this book. The author provides hope for those who have come from a past of sexual sin and/or those who are struggling sexually in their marriage. It’s a beautiful picture of how Christ loves us so intimately and how we should be bringing him glory at all times, even in our bedrooms with our spouse.
June 4, 2025
I would highly recommend this book to anyone, particularly the first half of this book talking about the theology of sex. He gave lots of great practical principles that can be applied in any marriage, as well as emphasized getting connected to other believes in a local church to address situation-specific questions. Great resource!
August 21, 2025
Wanted to learn more about the theology behind sex as I walk with young people and also friends. This topic isn’t discussed enough in the church and I think young people (and everyone) need to have more info and insight into the way God designed it. HIGHLY recommend
September 9, 2025
SUCH an excellent resource. There are not a lot of books out there like this, but this one was so well done. I could feel Mehl’s care and compassion through the pages!
September 17, 2025
Great resource for counseling difficult situations
October 19, 2024
Excellent. Must read. Great clarity, compassion, scriptural basis for arguments, doesn’t over share.
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews