Everything Flirts: Philosophical Romances

by Sharon Wahl

At the heart of the stories in Everything Flirts are some of life’s trickiest questions: Why is it so hard to make the first move on a date? How do we find the person we will love? If you finally find a person to love, how do you convince them to love you back?

With a mixture of humor and reverence, Sharon Wahl hijacks classic works of philosophy and turns their focus to love. The philosopher Wittgenstein helps us consider the limits of language: Does there exist an argument, a logical deduction, that will cause another person to love us? The philosopher Zeno’s laws of motion stipulate that we can only ever cross half of any distance. This principle is applied to a first date, where making a first move becomes more and more impossible because the movie this couple goes to see is a depressing mood-killer. A woman afraid of love applies Bentham’s utilitarian principles to find her perfect match, testing every man she meets until she finds one who aces every one of her tests. Nonetheless, she wonders: Is he right for her? Is she ready to fall in love forever? The sublime and the ridiculous come together to playfully examine why love just might be a topic too hard for philosophers to explain.

Genres: Short Stories

172 pages, Paperback

Published November 5, 2024

Reviews

[Veronique · Rating 3 out of 5]

Took me a while to get through the short stories that are part of the collection. My biggest contention is that every single one of the narrators sounds the same even though they have different names so I had a hard time differentiating the different storylines/romances.

[J Earl · Rating 5 out of 5]

Everything Flirts by Sharon Wahl is a collection of linked stories that seem like it might be auto-fiction. Like any introspective fiction this will likely appeal very much to some readers while not at all to others. I happen to have been able to relate to a lot of the feelings and, more important for me, the manner in which the character understands and reflects on what is happening.

I want to talk a little about the "philosophical" element of the stories. I talked with a couple friends who read a few of the stories and came to the realization that those with some formal philosophy education will fall into two distinct camps. In thinking back, I realized that this was true when I was both a student and when I later taught some of these thinkers. One group generally keeps philosophy in a narrow lane, often with comments about whether a specific philosopher would or wouldn't have thought something. For these, philosophy is an academic pursuit and even though it has affected that person's way of thinking it has done so unconsciously. The person doesn't think back to what Nietzsche wrote when something comes up in life unless it can hold an almost one-to-one correspondence. The other camp often thinks about what a philosopher may have written and applies the germ of that thought to events and feelings that have no direct correspondence. The philosophy for these people become part of a toolbox for understanding their lives and the world around them. Both types made excellent students, so it isn't about "knowing" the philosophy. It is more about whether the texts and ideas are only in conversation with the tradition it responds to or whether it is alive and well in conversation with our current lived lives. I think the second type will enjoy this book far more than the first.

I actually started the book twice; I came to the first story unsure what to expect and overthought what I was reading. I put it aside for a few days then came back with my usual fiction mindset; what are the characters experiencing and how well am I understanding and relating to their lives. From that point on I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. I actually revisited some of the philosophy to help me better appreciate how the protagonist internalized the ideas. Which, of course, gave me more perspectives from which to incorporate their thought into my life.

I will caution some readers, it is counter-productive to try to decide whether Wittgenstein, for example, meant what the character took from his writing. This is a look at how his writing and thought became a part of the character's way of thinking. As such, it is less about a "proper" understanding and more about the dialogue between that philosopher and this character. You're eavesdropping, so don't sit as judge and jury, just try to understand and empathize.

Reviewed from a copy made available by the publisher via NetGalley.

[Matt Leibel · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Men are not sentences. I like to pretend they are, to think of them as things I can take apart and rearrange, but they are not. They have to be right all along. If you must edit, follow another one.” I’m delighted (but not surprised) that this collection from my friend and former MFA-mate Sharon is terrific. Just the right combination of brainy, irreverent, imaginative, and brave. The collection lives up to its title with stories that involve Zeno’s paradox and a first date, Zarathustra on The Dating Game, the love lives (or lack thereof) of philosophers from Leibniz to Bertrand Russell to the fascinating case of Charles Fourier, who in 19th century France organized orgies under the doctrine that every mature man and woman should be guaranteed a “satisfying minimum of sexual pleasure.” One story about a relationship with an academic is written in the form of a proof a la Wittgenstein. Philosophical questions around the nature and value of love dovetail with stories from the narrators’ own love lives, including loves with modern philosophers (one of whom I may have met a version of in real life?).

[Kate · Rating 3 out of 5]

When you were fifteen, did you practice telepathy and see ghosts? Did you tote Bertrand Russell around in your pocket and rub simple things smooth while praying for love? If so, check out Everything Flirts, a collection of brief “philosophical romances” by Harper’s contributor and documentary film producer Sharon Wahl. “Play dice with the gods at their table, the earth” and carve open your heart while you think, therefore, are.

[Spenser James · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this was really pretty. I read these stories over my lunch breaks at work, and their gentle depth softened my days. This book wasn’t quite cozy, but by a thread it was (to borrow a phrase I picked up from a friend).

[Candy :) · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting read, felt like I was feeling things from a distance, a bit too much of a distance for my liking, but nonetheless a nice way to look at romance. I liked the mini stories but, like someone else said, it was hard to distinguish between the different perspectives.

[Frank Garretson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Imaginative, linguistically stunning, structurally inventive, stylistically brilliant: in short, a masterpiece.

[Will · Rating 4 out of 5]

“distance” is crazy

[Lindsey Z]

DNF @20%

Huh?

[victoria marie]

Longlisted for the 2025 Carol Shields Prize for Fiction